My Weight Loss Journey Pt. 1

know what he told me? He said. I was like, what up? Guys? Happy Monday. I am so glad to be in front of the mic today talking to you guys. I think this is an episode you guys will really enjoy because it's about something I think a lot of us have dealt or we'll deal with. I'm going to be opening up about how weight loss affects how we think, how we feel, and even how people treat us. It's just going to be meeting you today, so let's hop

into it. This Isy's and chill. So, as you guys probably know already, weight and body image is something I've dealt with my entire life, and as women, I think so many of us are taught that our value or self worth is tied up to our appearance. How pretty we are or how thin we are really matters in our culture and in society, and it's annoying. This episode is going to be divided into two parts. In this first part, I'm going to be talking about my journey

all the way from the beginning. So let's talk about it. As a kid, I was always a little bit overweight, since like I can remember, I was always thicker than the other girls in school. I always struggled with wine clothes. I think it started, like where I started really noticing was when I was ten years old and I would be made fun of and it was just it was tough. I want to say that it started when I realized that what was happening to me because I was sexually

abused by my dad was not right. Because it started when I was eight years old, and at ten, the conversations at school started changing with my friends, and I started realizing what sex is, and that's where, you know, fifth grade, they start talking about sex education and it just started like kind of tormenting me, and I started holding on to my weight, and that's where it just started, you know, spirallling out of control, and it just started, I think, getting worse as I got older. My period

came when I was twelve years old. My body started changing and then it just it's been a thing, you know what I mean. So I and I talked to my therapist about this and she said, yeah, it's because you weren't expressing certain things, so you were holding on to your weight as a form of protection. So AnyWho, it's something I've been dealing with forever. At home, it was always a conversation because my mom also struggled with her weight, and it could Yeah, it's it's hereditary, you

know what I mean. Like it's something that like I think comes from my grandfather's side. They're a little bit more on they're a little bit more on the heavier side. And so that's something my mom struggled with. And my grandpa would always tell her, and I know this because she would tell me. He would say, so, you know best, So if you don't lose weight, you're not gonna find a man like you. You can't be fat, you can't be a gorra, you know what I mean. And it

really did. It affected her and then she had me at fifteen. Imagine her little body because she was fairly like, you know, on the thinner side, I guess. Such at fifteen she had me, she got pregnant, and she gained eighty pounds. That's a lot, and and she just said, oh my god, you she would always say, you fucked up my body. But I'm like o, gage was like my stretch marks came, like she lost I'm sorry, she gained so much weight, and she was she was young.

And then four years later she had my sister, and you know what I mean. So it's something that she struggled with and she didn't want us to go through what she had gone through and how she felt. So at home, it was always like we were on every freaking diet that you can think of. It was the Zone diet, it was Adkins, it was you know, all

these things, and we couldn't have fun cereals. We would only have kicks because you know, back then we were like on you know, Wick and Welfare and food sam so it was like certain stuff that we can afford, and it was like, you know, at Wick they would give us kicks. So it was just a different type of childhood. Like my lunches were different, you know, and

we had to have non fat milk. I mean, imagine being freaking eleven twelve years old and it's like, oh, you have to have egg whites and tomatoes and a slice of a greate fruit the half of a great fruit and non fat milk when all your friends are having bacon and freaking pancakes. So it was like always a conversation, and it was always like you have to work out to the point where I think my sisters and I we all feel the same. Like Jackie always

talks about it. My sister Jackie always talks about how my mom sent her to school with her lunch in a brown bag and it was a can of green beans and some tuna and a fork, like that's what she had to eat. And she was so embarrassed. She didn't even put it like in a cute little tuble where she just put in a bag and said here, open it, and this is what you're going to have. And she even sent Jackie and even Jenica for a little bit to what they call fat camp literally it's

called fat camp to lose weight. So it was always a conversation and my mom would be like if I would eat something, she'd be like, oh my god, you know it's going to go straight to your thighs or things like that. So it was sticks so in my mind. Anyways, I mean, she she did help me lose weight. You know, there was a time when my mom and I weren't talking. She sent me to go live at my grandma's house.

And then when I came back to live with her, she put me on this like strict diet, dude, like strict diet, and I had to just dance my way every day, washing clothes in the garage. You know, I think I've told you guys the story before, but like to lose weight, and she and I did lose weight. She was a very good trainer. Like even I want to say, I was eleven twelve years old in our living room in Long Beach listening to Michael Jackson, and she would do like a freaking dance class. She was

so good at dancing. And we would sit there and do aerobics and her friends and her and I would do it and it was just like a thing. So it's something that like our whole family has struggled with, and it's been something that's been embedded in our in our brain. And you guys know that food is such a huge part of our culture. It's you go to your theas house, to your grandma's house, to anyone's house. Is like they want to feed you. And they don't

want to feed you a little bit. They want to feed you a lot because that's the way they show that they love you. And then if you don't eat it or you say no sofin, then they get kind of like hurt. So then you feel like, you know, I have to eat it. And well as a Mexican, as a Latina, you know, you have your beans and your rice and then your protein, and you have tortilla or sometimes you have bread. It's like it's a lot

of carbs, you know. So it's something that in our household, it's like here, this is how I'm going to show you my love. And also our culture loves to use manteka, you know what I mean, instead of using all oil. So it's like little things like that throughout the years that I've learned that, yeah, the beans are freaking refried beans are delicious with manteka, you know, with lard. But there are healthier ways of cooking them, you know. But it's it's in our culture, it's part of of us,

you know. And not only that, but I remember hearing from everyone in my family that it's like you have to finish everything on your plate because there are starving children in the world, and there are kids that don't have food, and you're so lucky, so you need to eat it all, you know what I mean. One time, I remember my mom made I think it was like, uh Pierre had chicken legs, and she made peas and carrots, and I think there was white rice, and I didn't

really like the bone, you know what I mean. Like I was more of like, you know, a chicken breast type of girl, but the chicken legs are like less expensive. So she would make that a lot. And one day I kind of like, I was like, I'm just gonna like pretend I, you know, I ate it, and I threw it in the trash ooh girl. She made me get it out of the trash can and eat it right in front of her. She's like, Nope, you're gonna eat it all, and you're gonna eat your peas and

your carrots. She made me get it out of the trash can. You guys's like, you're not gonna throw away food in this household. If you don't like it, then you need to move out, or you need to give me money, and the food is expensive and you're not gonna like And I was just saying, I'm like, oh my god, okay, you know what I mean. Like, I was like, I don't like it, said, oh, you can't pick and choose. So it was like a thing like it's like you eat when mom is making or you

don't eat it all. And sometimes I wouldn't eat because she's like, Okay, if you don't like what I'm making, then you're not gonna eat. I wouldn't eat till the next day dinner time. I don't know if I've ever said this out loud, or maybe I didn't in my book. I don't remember. It's been I have three books, you guys, but people always ask me, Okay, did you get liposuction? Have you gotten any cosmetic work done? And yes, I have.

Before I was a little bit more embarrassed to say because it was like frowned upon and it was like, oh my god, only celebrities do that. But I had my first liposuction when I was eighteen, almost nineteen years old, my mom took me to TJ with her doctor when brostro God rest his soul. He's no longer alive, but he did my mom's ypo section. And my mom was so like consumed with us looking good, and she's like, you're eighteen, you know, we need to like get you more of a waste. And so she took me at

nineteen years old. I had no choice. I mean, I guess I did have a choice. I could have said no, but it was kind of like no, it's gonna be good for you. It was like so celebrated. I guess that. I was like, okay, cool. Yeah, So we went and I got my first LiPo section and I loved it. I'm not gonna lie. I was like, oh damn all look good. You feel me Like it was like the

first one. So my body was a virgin. So it's like that's the best kind of like time I guess to have a LiPo section because it just comes out so much better. So it did help my self esteem. I did feel good. My waist was a lot smaller my arms. I think it did like a full like on my back and stuff like that. It was like a full like three sixty type of LiPo section. So I was very happy. The only thing thing is I

didn't take care of myself. And that's the thing people think, Oh, lipol suction is a forever fix, and that is not the case. If anything, you can ruin the shape of your body if you don't take care of yourself, because they're removing fat cells from your body that your body needs to survive. So if they remove it from your abdomen and your back and your arms, well guess what It's going to go to your legs. And that's exactly

what happened to me. I at eighteen nineteen, Like I was like, okay, whatever, Like you know, I was eating freely and yes, you know, my mom try to keep us on track, but I mean we're teenagers. I would go to school, I was driving, I would go to you know, fast food restaurants behind her back and all this stuff. So I wasn't taking care of myself and I felt comfortable and I felt just content with my body. So I'm like, okay, I can eat. So I started going to my fingers, to my neck, to my cheeks,

to my legs, so the fat will go somewhere. Trust me, your body is like, Okay, you need this amount of freaking fat in your body, I'm going to find a place to live. And it does even it'll go down to your toes. So that's what I learned throughout the years and after getting I don't know, I probably have gotten three LiPo sections, you guys, three okay throughout the years because it's like, oh my god, now the fat

went to my legs. Okay, I want to like kind of bring down my thighs now and you know, and oh my god, my arms got big again. Do it again. So it's like I've done liplo section, but it's like now I'm so turned off by LiPo section. Like people think that I did LiPo section now to lose weight, and I didn't. I'm cool whatever you want to do. I'm a huge advocate for like cosmetic surgery. Do it, do your thing, like whatever's going to make you happy.

But I did not this last time. And honestly, I try to just stay away from it because, like I said, it can really change your body. And I'm not mad at my mom for taking me to get plastic surgery so young, but I wish I would have waited to be honest. Until I educated myself a little bit more, I never really had an eating disorder. I mean, I'm the type of person that I eat if I'm happy, I eat if i'm sad. I love food. I'm a foodie. I love it. It's part of what makes me happy.

And now that I'm getting more mature, i'm getting older, I'm realizing that food should be something that just nourishes our body and not see it as something like that. I absolutely, yes, I need it, but it's more of like having a different type of relationship with food. I did start taking like I don't know if you guys remember, I think they still have them out there, but hydroxy cut because I saw it on a commercial, so I ordered it. And I started taking that at a very

young age. And that also, I think through my body and my system through a loop. I was so young. I was too young to take that stuff. I must have started at I don't know, like twenty nineteen something like that. I even took like breast growth pills that I saw on TV. Yes, I'm that girl the infomercials. I'm that girl that Yes, they always get me. So my mom would always make fun of me for that. So I would order all kinds of stuff and I'm not like, I think it really did. It fucked things up,

you know, in my hormones. I was taking estrogen for my loops to get bigger because I want to figure boobs, Like who does that? You know what I mean? Like, and it's all because of what we see on TV and all this stuff and now with social media. So it's like, I feel it's important for us to have these conversations, especially in our culture, about food and about educating ourselves before doing things because it can really affect us in the long run. I never made myself like

throw up or anything like that. I was just like taking pills and doing even fantramine. I did fenermin for a little bit, and all that stuff affects you. It really does. And once you stop taking it, like the hydroxy cut and the fentermine and all that stuff that helps you lose weight really quick, because we all want that magic pill that's going to do it like this,

you know, real fast. Once you stop taking it, you are going to be a lot heavier than you first started, you know what I mean, Like it's going you're gonna get bigger, you know what, I mean like it's just it just happens because your body's like, oh my god, where's that thing that drug that's helping me feel good and lose weight, and then in front of mein like ooh, let me tell you it made me feel so crazy jittery and well, anyways, that's all stuff that happened before

my singing career, you know what I mean. I did all this crazy stuff before my singing career. I think I did the first two light bul sections before I was twenty six, I think, and then I started singing at like what twenty seven, and that was a whole other situation. I never had an issue no matter how big I was or how small I was. I think the lightest I've ever been was when my mom put me on that diet when I was what fifteen, When I moved back with her, I was one hundred and

twenty eight pounds. That was like the lightest I've ever been, I think in my life. Besides when I was like six. The last time I was a size six was like when I was six years old. You guys, right now, I can tell you I'm a size six, but we'll get into that later. So AnyWho, I never had an

issue finding someone, you know. I always had a boyfriend or talking to someone, even when I was younger at school, you know, seventeen years old, and so I never really thought like, Okay, I know I'm a little thicker than everyone else around me, like a lot of girls my age. But when I really notice, oh man, okay, well I guess I'm a lot bigger than I think I am.

Because when I started singing and I started doing reality obviously television makes you gain at least ten pounds more, if not more than ten pounds, I just started getting a lot of criticism, like a lot of people just talking crap on television on social media, and it really just started affecting me, and I started, like, I started seeing myself differently. Like I've always loved myself. I've always

been pretty confident. I mean sometimes I was like, by myself, I think I'd probably be like, oh man, I wish this was a little different, you know what I mean or whatever. But the music career, it's like, especially you guys, that's another thing in our Latin culture. It's like the thinner you are, the prettier you are, the more accepted you are, you know, and it's like, if you are an artist, if you are an actress, like you need to be a certain freaking size, like and if you're not,

then it's like what are you teaching people. It's like, in order to be considered one of the beautiful people, like you need to be a certain size, especially because you're on TV. And that's what I would get all the time, like, oh my god, you have such a pretty face, but when are you gonna lose weight? Literally like that, I'll never forget them. Francisco. I don't know if you guys ever watched some Francisco Hiante. I went

to his show. We were on a break, we did a part of the interview, and then on the break he literally looked at me and he said, oh, okay, Gwanda the pissel kinse I just I just finished, like, actually I just lost fifteen pounds. You know what you told me? He said, he said, well, we can't really tell what I was like, So then the cameras turned back on and I'm just like, oh my god, I felt like crap. Dude, like literally looked at me like, oh, you can't tell that you just lost fifteen pounds, dude,

I'll never forget. I was just like, dude, I grew up watching you with my grandma, and now I'm like, dude,

you're not even that thin yourself. And then you find these people on social media talking crap and saying, oh, you're fat, you're this or that, and then you look at their profile picture and they're bigger than you, and I'm just like what, I was so confused, And I'm not gonna mention another person that has said that I'm big and that my legs are too big and stuff like that, like he's very big, extremely and that's fine,

whatever tickles your pickle, Like I don't care. I'm not one to go and judge people for their size or I will never call all your fat or like no, I just I cannot. But this person, this guy is really big, and he has and has had the audacity to say like, oh my god, her legs are just so fat, like and then it just sounds worse in Spanish like oh my god, so spirit and it's like,

oh my god, dude. It's been tough. It's been tough to just give people in the media sometimes the middle finger and just say you know what, if you guys and I've had to work through it because I'm like, no, you're not gonna break me. You are not going to break me. You're not going to stop me. I'm not going to give up because you think I should because I'm not the size you want me to be. No, absolutely not. So it's been it's been tough. It has

been tough. But thank goodness, amongst everything my mom taught me and yes, how to eat better and how to work out and everything. She also was a woman that was considered out of the norm completely for having five children, a single mother and not being a size too and a very successful singer. That she always taught me to be confident and to love myself and never had an

issue with finding someone to love her. So that's one thing I thank her for so much, because no matter what, no matter how much, it was like a conversation, and the biggest topic in our household was losing weight, it was also about self love. So I think that's what got me through because I was like, well, my mom went through it. They talked about her a lot, and she became the biggest regional Mexican artist, So we're gonna be all right, So thank God and shout out to Jenny,

I love you, Mom. But okay, guys, so we're gonna stop this episode right here. Stay tuned for part two tomorrow because that's what I'm going to talk about, my weight loss and how it's affected me and how I'm treated. I'm also going to open up about my experience with ozembic. It's gonna be a good one. You're not gonna want to miss it, so make sure to listen. Ask the Manyana. This is a production of iHeartRadio and the micro Gurda

podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram at Michael Gourda Podcasts and follow me Cheeky's That's c h i q u i s. For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast, and check us out on YouTube.