I'm Overwhelmed

you even recognize when you're feeling overwhelmed? And I'm going to talk all about that today because I've been experiencing that a lot, so I want to talk about it. You know, Cheeky's and Chill is a space where I share everything with you guys, anything that's on my mind, So I am going to do that. And with that being said, I first want to thank you guys all

for coming onto my podcast, for listening. Whether you come just to see what I'm talking about, to tease me out, or to learn something, I hope you do learn something from me, So I just want to say thank you first and foremost. All Right, well, let's get this started, okay, So let me take a deep breath because today I'm feeling a little overwhelmed, and I think it's I've been feeling like that almost every day for the past month, maybe, And personally, I am overwhelmed because I have a lot

going on in my career. I have the launch of, you know, my new tour, the A Month Is Tour that same day the album comes out. Preparing for that, there are so many things that go into a tour, especially a tour of this magnitude, which is I think the biggest tour as of yet in my career. So there are a lot of like little ends that things that you're just like, oh my god, I forgot about that, and then I forgot about that, and then it's just like,

oh my god. And sometimes I just want to do everything myself because I feel like I just I'm going to get it done, and I know how I like things, and I don't want to run the risk of someone not doing it correctly. But then that's not fair to the other person. So I'm just like, and then it's not fair to me. So I've just been feeling that, not only that, in the midst of all of this going on, promoting the album, filming the podcast, doing everything

that I do. I'm planning a wedding, and then other surprises that have come into my life that are great, and it's okay. It is what it is. I am happy and I'm grateful. But the truth is that I've learned to say when people ask me, how are you, I'm honest. Now before i'd be like, I'm good, I just like put on that little like mask of I'm good. I'm good, I'm good and as positive as you want to be and as positive as I like to be.

The truth is it sometimes we're not okay, we're not good, and it's okay to say, you know what, I'm having an overwhelming day, I'm not feeling too good, and it's better to be honest. And I think that it's made me even feel better to say it out loud. And every day is a new day, and I try my best. And I woke up this morning and I meditated and I prayed and I said, everything's going to be okay, it's going to be a great day. And it was.

But then shit happens. Then life happens, and it's happening, and I do my best to just take time throughout the day and just breathe and say, you know what, everything I'm doing I'm grateful for and I love doing it. I love coming here and doing my podcasts, and I love going to rehearsals, and I love having meetings and planning, and I love planning my wedding and I am I

am happy to do everything. But the truth is that I have to be honest with myself, and sometimes I feel like I am spreading myself too thin, and I guess it goes back to me wanting to please people. And that's been an issue and I've talked about it

here on the podcast a lot. That's been something that I've been dealing with my whole life, and I've gotten so much better at it, being able to say no and learning the power of saying no. But sometimes I catch myself doing things not to disappoint people, to show myself I can do it, and yes, maybe I can do it, But should I do it? Is it good for me to do it? And That's where I'm at

right now, And I have to give myself grace. And the reason I'm speaking about this is because I'm sure a lot of you have felt this way or feel it and sometimes you don't even know if you are feeling overwhelmed, And for me, an indication is when I'm irritable. When I'm easily irritable, that is a sign to me that I'm like, Okay, I'm overwhelmed. I'm overworking myself and

I have to step back. And I've been taking days where I'm just like, I won't look at my phone for hours because then I'll be stuck on my phone and I'll add more to my plate, you know. So I'm learning to just take some time to myself on Sundays and just do nothing. But it's been a thing, you guys, it's been It's moments where I just want to cry. And I thought, you know what. I think it's because I named my album Ye month is, and I named you know, the tour, and you know, and

I've been saying this in every interview. I've been saying this. I say it all throughout the album, all throughout the tour. You know, how diamonds are created, and they're created under a lot of pressure, and it takes years for a diamond to be created, and we talked about this on an episode. So I think I'm definitely feeling it. Everyone's

feeling it. Everyone's feeling the pressure. But I know because I know, because I have so much faith, because I know how good this album is, and I know everything that we're planning for this tour that it's going to be great. So anyways, by this time, once you guys listen or hear this podcast, the tour already started, so all date you guys on that. But anyways, I'm going to look at my notes because that's how overwhelmed I am.

Usually I don't even really look at my notes, but I'm going to look at them because this is an important topic that I think that we need to speak about our mental health, our emotional health and be okay with speaking about it and not always trying to pretend like everything is okay. And I think that's part of healing, of getting better is recognizing like, hey, I'm feeling this way, I'm feeling stressed out, I'm feeling whatever. Now I'm okay with say, you know what, I'm not having a good

day to day. I'm a little irritable, so just don't mind me. I am a little snappy right now, and not try that's putting more pressure on yourself of just like pretending and wanting to pretend like everything is okay, because that's a lot like that takes up a lot of energy to just have to just in a way fake it, you know, like they say fake it till you make it. I'm just like, let it all hang

out like this, this is what it is. And I learned that that came with experience and time, and it didn't come very easily, you know, because I always want to be that positive person and as positive as I feel like I am. My brother Mikey always tells me, He's like, oh my god, you're just so annoying you and your positivety. But I just I'd rather live my life being positive and saying even though I say, hey, I'm having a bad day, in the back of my mind,

I'm like, okay, this is just the day. It's just a moment. I'm gonna be fine. That's just who I am. That's how I'm built. But the point is I'm better with speaking it, with voicing it. With voicing Hey, guys, I'm I'm not doing too good right now, and sometimes

I want to run away. I've had those moments you guys a lot these past few weeks where I'm just like, I just want to disappear, and not like disappear to heaven, but like disappear and go to like a mountain where there's no like Wi Fi or signal and just stay in a cabin and eat fruits and vegetables and just disappear where no one can find me, just me and me and just say, well, fuck it. I have no idea. She's just gone. Not Richard, not my manager, not anybody

can get a hold of me. I've had those moments where I'm like, I think, I just I want to just go away for a little bit, you know, because on top of all that, you guys, I have I feel like I'm complaining right now, but you know what, I'm just expressing to you guys, because I'm human at the end of the day, you know. So anyways, on top of all of that, I have my business partners, and then I have to promote my stuff and I want to sell my stuff, and I love my brands.

But I've even said, you know what, I'm going to chill on that right now. My focus is my tour and my album and I have to be okay with that. And even with that, I have learned to put my priority straight. So that is the whole thing here right now, setting our priorities straight, okay, Like making a list of priorities and being okay with saying if I don't get this, if I don't get to this secondary list today, it's okay, I'll get to it tomorrow. Before I'd set something like,

i'd love I love checking things off my list. It feels just so delicious. I'm just like, oh my god, I feel feeling. I love the feeling of feeling accomplished. So I would thrive off of that, but I'd put so much pressure on myself, like, oh my god, it's seven pm and I still have two more things to do on my list, and it's just like I'd put all this pressure on myself and it just caused me

so much stress and I'd be unhappy. So now what I do is like I do a list of priorities, my primary list, and then I have a secondary list, and I'm like, okay, I'll try to get to that, but if I can't get to that secondary list today, it's okay, It'll roll over to tomorrow. If God gives me life, you know, and if it's God's will. Basically, it's what I said, and that helps me and that's

helped me a lot. So I'm sure some of my business partners aren't the happiest with me right now, but I need to take care of my emotional and mental state. And I hope that through everything that I am sharing with you guys and i'm expressing, you guys can also learn to put yourself first in that aspect, you know, that's part of self care and self love, something we

talk about on the podcast a lot. Because as much as I tell you guys and I give you guys advice and everything, I am also human and I also have to keep myself accountable and I also have to work. It's not like, oh, you know, I know everything and I don't have bad days, and no I'm I'm wrong with you guys. I'm honest with you guys. And this is why I feel like it's so important to share all of these things and hopefully through my experiences, you

guys learn a thing or two. And touching on this like people pleaser thing that I can say, I'm recovering and it's going to be something I'm going to have to be intentional about, which is something that doesn't come easy. Remember we've talked about that being intentional, and it's something that I do. I want to make people happy. I love making people happy and for them to in a way of prove of me or not disappoint people. But it did. It was doing me no good, you know.

And I've learned little by little to say no. And I think sometimes I do feel like I need to say yes to certain things because especially in my professional life, to like my manager or my record label and stuff, because if I don't say yes. And I also feel that pressure of like other people are also depending on me, Like I don't only just think about myself. I think about everyone else and all the other families that need

to eat. And I'm like, well, maybe I can do that, even though a little part of me is like I don't have one hundred percent peace with that, but I'm gonna do it because I know other people are depending on me, you know. And also because I have this whole thing of like, oh, you know, Cheeky's can do it, or she's done it, and yes, I do want to be that example absolutely, like I'm like, Okay, if cheek is gonna do it, so can you. But sometimes I just like there's certain things that I just don't want

to do. And now I'm getting to that point where I'm like, even though it's gonna make me a lot of money and make us a lot of money, like my camp, my team, I'm not going to do it because things are changing in my life, you know, and I want to be healthy and I don't want to have another breakdown. And as i'm speaking to you guys right now, I'm realizing there are certain things and I'm making mental notes right now that I have to say no too. And people are going to be disappointed, but

I'm gonna be fine. And I don't mean to disturb anyone's life or hurt anyone, but if it's just too much right now, it's just too much. And then in my personal life, yes, I have been the head of my household and there are times, you guys, where I'm like, and I think I've mentioned it to you here that I've thought I'm gonna sell my house. That thought went away. It's slowly creeping back, and I'm like, I'm gonna sell it because and I love my house, or maybe I'm

gonna rent it out just because I think. Am I doing all of this and everything that I'm doing because financially. I need to do it to keep up with the lifestyle that I've created for myself, which I'm very proud of. I'm very proud of of what I've been able to create and build. But I also just I just happiness. I feel like it comes in so many different shapes and sizes that I don't necessarily like, I don't know,

Johnny moved out and all this stuff. So it's just so many things are coming to my mind and I'm unpacking it as I'm speaking to you guys right now. So I know that there's certain decisions that I need to make, and I have faith that or maybe I just need to save a little more. I don't know, but I do feel like that necessity of saying yes to certain things because I have to finance my life, you know, because it's me, and of course Emilio does

his part. But at the end of the day, it's like we're still not married, Like I can't expect him to like pay for certain things and to like, you know, we'll have that conversation once we're married and we'll figure that out, you know. But in reality, like just thinking of my life and what I've done, I don't think it should be anyone else's responsibility but my own. So I'm gonna I don't know, I guess I in some ways, I just want to go back to basics, you know.

And I'm going to give you guys a real life example. I don't know if if some of you may know this or not or whatever, but I was a judge on a show called and I did about I don't know, I think a few seasons, two or three seasons, and they wanted me to come back for the next season. And I had to say no because I realized, and this is another thing for you guys to to consider, is I started on the episodes while we were recording, I started just drinking, you know. I was like, oh yeah,

you know. Instead of my in my in my water cup, instead of water, there was Tekla And I was like, I'm gonna get through these because we would record like two or three episodes in one night, so was it were long, and the energy was just a little off.

And I was very grateful for the opportunity and it made us you know, it was good financially, but I just couldn't because my peace of mind and I just I wasn't there and I realized, I said, Okay, this isn't this is no longer fun for me because now I'm drinking and we're going back to twenty eighteen where I was drinking to get through it. And I'm like, okay. That was like an indication for me of like I need to say no and I need to put my foot down and even though people will be upset, I

got to do it's best for myself, you know. And I've done that in my personal life as well, you know, even with things with my siblings when sometimes they want something and I have to just say no because I just don't feel peace with it. It's actually making me feel better to talk about this because it reminds me of how grateful I am at the end of the day.

But the truth is that I need to go back to the drawing board and really set certain things straight within myself, within my career, business and everything to just make sure that I am happy, absolutely happy doing what I'm doing. Because I love to be productive, you guys, I think we all do. Again. I thrive off of feeling accomplished, but sometimes you just have to be. You just have to just be. The other day, I was trying to organize my closet, and I was like, Okay,

I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do that. I got to a section because that's another thing, like I need my home to be organized and to be clean and everything to put be put in its place, especially with the tour and stuff because I'm not going to be home a lot, so I like to do it myself. But literally, I sat there and I finished a section, and I looked everywhere else and I just I said, I can't do this, like I just I can't. And you know what I did. I didn't. I stopped doing it,

and I said, I have to delegate. I have to just have someone else do it. I literally for the rest of the day laid in bed, ordered some food because I didn't even want to cook, and I watch movies and that's what I did. And in my mind I had woken up that morning I said I'm going to organize my you know, my personal closet and my downstairs closet. And I ended up doing nothing, and I was fine. Before the old Gene would have been like, oh my god, I can't lay down like I would

beat myself up about it. I would like like I felt guilty resting. And I've learned again throughout the years since twenty eighteen after my meltdown, that rest is essential. You guys, if you are not feeling like you want to do something, don't do it. Don't do it just to please someone else. Don't do it just because if you can. Of course, there's certain things that we just

have to do, like going to work. I mean, we can't be calling off all the time, or if you've got to go to school, or there's just certain responsibilities like that we have to breathe through and like take deep breaths throughout the day. But if there's just certain things that aregist can wait, let them wait. And that's what I did, and I just I said, I'm gonna just do what I can today and that's helped me

a lot as well. And right now I know what my focus is, and the focus is doing my best at my concerts and memorizing all of my songs and that's it. And it makes me feel good to say this is the focus right now, and everything else will happen when it needs to happen. And I'm not going to pressure myself anymore, because yes, I love to do lists.

I love being productive. I love to say, oh I got all this done today, but it can wait, and it should wait for our mental health and our emotional health, you guys, because if we're not okay, then we're not going to do everything that we have to do with love, and we're not going to do it right. Most importantly, so this concludes our episode. Again, thank you so much for coming every week to listen to Cheeky's and chill

or Dear Cheeky's. I am profoundly grateful for you, and I hope that from this episode you could take something that will help you and you can learn from my experiences so that you don't have a meltdown of your own again. If you are overwhelmed, just know that this too, shell pass. You will get through it, and we will be fine. We will be fine. Where there's a will, there's a way. No, that's very cliche, but it's true.

Where there's a will, there's a way, and we have will, and we're strong and we're courageous and everything's gonna be good. Note to myself hashtag not to myself. To us, you guys, thank you so much. I love you, guys, very very much los Quiro, los Amo, and I will see you here on the next episode of Cheeky's and Show. This is a production of iHeartRadio and Mike Wura podcast Network.

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