Honoring My Mother, Jenni Rivera

a really great start. If you're listening to me today, well I'm sure it will be. But thank you so much for tuning in. Today's episode is one that's near and dear to my heart. This podcast is very special to me for many reasons. I've talked about that before. It's a space where I can share very personal and intimate details with you, and that's exactly what I'm going to be doing today. It's dedicated to my mom. You guys, it's going to be nine years since my mother, Jenny Rivera,

left us. So grab some tequila, some coffee, probably some tequila, and let's do it. Let's get into checks and Chill. So this Friday marks nine years since my mom died. UM. December nine, my mom and six others died in a plane crash in northern Mexico, and that day, yes the world, we all lost her, and it was a very difficult day. Those of you that know me, that I have read my book, know that I lost my mom on October two. I lost her before everyone else did her and I

had a falling out, a misunderstanding. There were a lot of toxic voices around her at the time, and we weren't talking. This is a second time that she had done that to me. Um, she kind of just she was a woman that was very strong and said in her ways, so her lessons were always very tough. UM. So the first time she did that to me, and it was honestly two months as well, I was fourteen going into my to my fifteenth birthday. It was that

summer of when I was fourteen. Um, we were ending school and you know during that time, you know, like at the end ever, you're doing all the tests and stuff. So I'm I went with my friends. Instead of telling her, I got out early. I remember it was a Monday as well, and instead of telling her, hey, Mom, I got out early. I went with my friends to go have a cheeseburger and fries across the street. I just thought, okay, I'll tell her that I'm off, you know, at twelve

o'clock the rest of the week. So she thought I had lied to her. Well I kind of did in a way. So anyways, she kicked me out. It was a big thing. I explained all of it in my book Forgiveness or better than in Spanish. And she stopped talking to me for two months. And I'll never forget because for my fifteenth birthday I didn't get a call from her. Then later on, as I explained the book

as well, how we started talking. You know, she just grabbed my little long because I was staying in my grandma's house, and she said, you know, I think it's time for you to come home. You've you've you've had a very nice time here at your grandma's house eating, so it's time for you to come home. And she put me on a diet and she fixed my hair because she had cut it. It's just so much, you know. So anyways, the second time that ever happened was in October.

On October two, that was basically the last time I had heard from my mother in September, things got really weird. My mom was in a very weird place in her life um emotionally and mentally, I feel. And this is another thing that we've never talked about publicly because it was always just forbidden. But my mom wasn't wasn't doing too well, and I could tell, and all of us could tell, but no one could say anything because we were afraid to upset her. But things were getting kind

of weird. And on October two, I did get the email and the subject said lights on. I believe it was lights on. And it was a long, long email, which maybe one day I'll share with you guys, very strong email, and basically what it said was that all everything came together and the lights were now on, that she could see clearly that I had been sleeping with her husband Estevan at the time. And I remember being at a dinner and I just dropped my phone. I said what I was in disbelief. I drove to my

mom's house. I didn't even finished reading the entire email that night, but I drove to my mom's house. I had all the gate codes. Everything has changed, I remember, I don't know how I did it, but I pulled that gate open and I was knocking and on the door, banging on it. Everything was closed, the keys were changed on me. I was just like, what in the hell is going on? I fell to the floor. I was crying. I called my sister Jackie. I was confused. I was like,

what the heck is going on? I tried my very best to contact her, and every way, through email, through her Twitter, she blocked me. Everywhere. She changed her email, she changed her number. I mean, coming from having all the access in the world to her to having none was devastating. And then my siblings had to forcefully be on her side because if not, it was an issue.

So it was very hard for me. It was a woman that came into her life a couple of months before that started throwing Vaneno just evilness into her ear, and I don't know how just made up this whole store, and my mom again was not in the right place emotionally or mentally. Don't take my word for it. One day my siblings will talk and say the truth about what was going on during that time. I have actually on my evidence to show that that could have not happened.

The night that she thought it happened. I had the phone record showing that when in the cameras it said that, Okay, maybe I was gone in the room with a Stevan, That's completely false. You could see my head in another camera. I have phone calls that I was actually on the phone with my uncle Juan and my ex boyfriend for thirty minutes during the time that she thought I was gone and couldn't see me in the cameras. So it's

just I never had the opportunity. I tried to explain this to her many times, and to my aunt and everyone around tell her this, but she just wasn't She didn't want to listen. That's why it was so important to me to write Forgiveness and to explain this is my truth, for my future children, from my future husband, for the people my followers that knew me from chickens and control from chickens, and roxy from what I was

already starting. I did not do this that I to me, it's accusing me of doing something like that is killing is like killing someone, is murdering someone. And I would never do that to my mother, first of all, as a woman, I just wouldn't do it, And secondly, I would be too damn scared to do that to my mom. I mean, I know my mother, like, there's no way, you know what I mean. And I loved to Stepan as a stepfather, and I loved him because he loved my siblings, because he was so good to my mother.

So no, it's completely false. And I invite you guys to read Forgiveness so that you guys can understand the entire story in detail. That's why I wrote the book. But that was what happened, and that's what that was, a falling out between my mom and I. But I always had a faith that we were going to talk, that we were going to talk and sit down and clear it up and everything was gonna be fine. But again, there wasn't enough time, and that's when I lost my mom.

I remember going to therapy and the therapist told me, you know what, you are going to have to start living your life like if she was no longer here. And I remember saying, like, what do you mean. It was like, yeah, like if she had passed away. This was two weeks before December nine, and I'll never forget. And I looked and I looked at my therapist and I said, what it hit me and I cried and I cried and I said, you know what, Yes, I'm

dying slowly inside. I had suicidal thoughts. I didn't have everything and everyone, my siblings, my mother that were so important to me. But of course I didn't understand that then. Now that I look back, now that I know how God works and now I know everything that I went through had a reason. But during that time it was it was horrible. So when December nine came and the world lost her, I was already a few steps into the healing process, so I was able to be there

for my siblings. And like I said, everything does happen for a reason. God's plans are perfect. And it hurt me very much. Obviously I lost her twice. But who kept me alive were my siblings, all four of them, but more than anything, Johnny and Jensica. And my sister. Jennica was fifteen, she's now twenty three. Johnny was eleven, he's now about to be twenty one. So I took them under my wing and I said, I let's go. I'm going to take care of you. I'm not going

to leave your side. And I didn't and I haven't. And that's the way that I honor my mother every single day since she passed. And yes, I was disinherited because of this whole fallout and this misunderstanding, and by the way, I gathered up all of my evidence to show my mom what is being said is not true, and she just kept saying that she needed time and time and time. And look, you know then there wasn't. Time just took its course and God had other plans.

But anyways, I was disinherited. But I always say that the inheritance that my mother left me were my siblings. The most important and the biggest inheritance are my siblings. And that's how I honor her legacy every single day because I know how important her children. We're an art to her till this day. Because I feel her around, I feel her. I can't say because acio and that i've seen her. No, I've seen her twice in these

past nine years. I've seen her twice in my dreams, and I get so sad the next day and for a few days that I feel she's like, I don't want to do that to her, so she doesn't come around in my dreams. As much anymore, because I'm pretty sure knowing her, she's busy in heaven doing her thing. I always talk to her though I took her Mom, I don't know where you're at, but I need you. So I just know that that's how I'm honoring her.

And I know that her children. And she said in any interview, any Jenny Rivera fans out there know how important her children were to her. She said it any time and every time that she could, she said it, she said in her book. So to me, that's what I've done is I've done my best in every single way to be a good older sister, to be a good exam pulled to my siblings, to have their back, to keep us united. It's been tough sometimes because of outside noises, other toxic voices. It's made it a little

difficult to have a peaceful relationship. But I've always said, hey, wait a second, let's come together. This is what Mom wants. She's always wanted this. She always told me, no matter what, you are the oldest, and I'm sorry that God made you the oldest, but you are the oldest for a reason, and you are too. Always keep your siblings united. Do not allow you and your siblings to be what my siblings and I are. She told me that countless times countless,

and that's what I try to do. I do want to say that the day that I found out December that my mom was missing, because that's what it was at first, her plane was missing. It just disappeared out of the sky. I was in Las Vegas. We were celebrating my cousin Karina's wedding. She had gotten married on the eighth, so that was during the day and we all went to go eat, and then after we all went to go party, and I remember being at this roof top uh nightclub. I think it was called Voodoo,

and I was fine. I had already kind of said okay, I took my therapists advice and said, okay, I'm gonna start living like my mom is no longer here. And I was feeling a little bit better emotionally and mentally. And I had just seen Johnny for the first time in months, in a few weeks, should I say, they're at my cousin's wedding. And it was so hard because it was just a weird energy. So it was kind of eating me up inside. So that night we went out and my friends and I were dancing on the

dance floor. I was looking up at the sky and I felt this sadness come upon me that I can't explain that. I just felt like, oh, like I just I wanted to fall to the floor and I just started crying in the middle of the dance floor. I'm telling you, I was. We were on a rooftop, so I just said, you guys, I sat down and I was just bawling and bawling, like the sadness came over me and I didn't know why. So I remember just telling my friends, Hey, it was Gerald at the time

in Brianna, and um. I said, let's just go back to the room, and we did, and we got McDonald's because food just you know, I've had an issue with food my whole life, so when I'm sad, I just want fatty stuff, you know, so um or should I say starchy foods. So I we had McDonald's. We sat on the floor, we ate it, and I fell asleep and at ten am in the morning, I was woken up by a phone call from my cousin Karina, who was, like I said, always also in Vegas with me, and

she said, hey, cousin, we gotta go. I said, wait, well, we have plans to do. What do you mean we gotta go to They know we gotta go. My dad just called me and said it's an emergency. We have to drive down to Grandma's house like now. And I'm like what. She's like, yeah, have you seen Twitter? And I'm like no, And she says, well, I don't think you should look, but you know, apparently your mom's plane is missing. I'm like, what do you mean, Yeah, it's missing.

They can't find it. So when I started, of course, I packed my stuff. I was driving a Prius at the time. I don't know how I did, and I don't recommend anyone to do this, but I got from Vegas to Lakewood, California in less than three hours. I was going so fast. After I read on Twitter Jenny, the late Jenny Rivera, like just so many things, like she had already she was gone, like she had already disappeared, like she was you know, I was like, wait a second,

we don't even know what's going on. It was horrible. It was all over the radio. I couldn't listen to music. I was just in silence. The entire time crying and I'm like the whole time, Oh my god, you can't do this to me. No, you can't do this to me. Like that's what I kept just repeating. It felt like forever to get to my grandma's house, but I got there in less than three hours, which is crazy. I don't know how I did that. Again, I don't recommend

anyone to do that. I was just so like in the need of getting to my siblings because during that time, again, I hadn't gotten a phone call from Jenica or Johnny. And they called me and they said, Jennica, call SI sister, where are you. I need you here. And when she said that, I was like, oh my god, Yes, they need me. And I felt so uncomfortable because I hadn't talked to none of my family and I was like, hardly going to receive me. And at that moment when

I got that phone call, I didn't care. Everything you raced and I said, I have to be there for these kids. I don't care. I walked in there with my head held high and I got those kids and I'm like, these are my kids. I don't know what's going on with my mom. I still had a faith that my mom was going to come back. That was on a Sunday. I had faith Monday Tuesday until Wednesday. I got to my grandma's house. Like I said, I was like there for Johnny. We were sleeping on the floor.

I mean, it was. It was chaotic at my grandma's house. UM. But on Wednesday, I told my uncle's you guys need to go find my mom. You need to find my mom. You guys, sorry, I don't trust the authorities in Mexico. I need someone from us, from our side to go and look for my mom physically, go on that mountain, find my mom. I had faith that maybe, yes, the plane had fallen, maybe she survived. I was thinking all

kinds of things. But then when I saw some pictures on the internet that showed some of her remains, and I had asked Jenica, I said, Jenica, what now, polished? What color was Mom wearing? She says, oh, red? And I started looking at pictures and sure enough, yes, in her last concert at Monterey UM, because she was coming from Monterrey back to Mexico City to record lavos, she

wanted to leave. And I knew my mom, so that's why she left at three thirty in the morning, so that when I was feeling that on the rooftop at one thirty, it was I think when everything was happening, when my mom had left, and I think she came to visit all of us. That's what I personally believe, so it all made sense afterwards, you know. So at three thirty am is when her her plane disappeared. I think that we all felt her that night. So anyways,

I told my uncle's go find my mom. And that's when I asked Jessica about her nail polish and it was red and in her remains, I saw, like it's so tough to say this, but her toes and they were red, and I knew, like we lost her. And I know those feet because so many times when she was tired, I would put on her shoes, I would take them off. I would missage her feet and I said, these are my mom's feet, her toes, and um, that's when I knew, and I remember, I felt something in

my heart. I'll never forget my safe place at my grandma's house because every corner of my grandma's house was full of just people. They're trying to comfort us, and outside everywhere. There was just so many people, her fans, which I'm so grateful for. But my only safe place was the restroom. And I remember grabbing a picture that my grandma had in the living room. I grabbed it and I knew I hadn't told the kids yet. I

hadn't told anybody that I saw those pictures. I don't even know how I found them or who sent them to me, some evil person. I have no idea. But I went into the restroom and I held the picture tight, and I swear to you that I heard my mom's voice tell me you have to be strong for these kids. And from that moment, I was like okay, and I cried by myself, and I was like, okay, I'm gonna be strong, and I gotta tell them. I can't let them think anymore that she's here, because she's not. And

I knew it, and I told them. I said, Johnny, I sat down, Johnny, and I said, Mommy is not coming back. So I just knew I had to tell them. And that's when I something came upon me and said I have to be resilient. I have to be strong. That's when it all started like making sense, like this is why everything happened. Because my mom and I were

so close. We were sisters, we were husband and wife, we were so many things that if this hadn't happened, this interruption in our relationship, I wouldn't have been strong enough to sustain this pain. And I knew it was going to be hard because I would have to go out and defend and clean up my name in some way.

But the most important thing for me at that time or my siblings, and I think the best way and right now that we're talking about her, because yes, the anniversary's coming up, is the best way that I can honor her is to continue being here from my siblings and and doing my best to be successful. For me, it's everything I do. Everything that I do, I think about siblings. I think about, Yes, they're okay, maybe financially they're okay right now, but what if they're not one day.

I want them to know that their sister has their back, that they have a home that they can come to, that the doors will always be open. And it makes me just work harder, you know, which is why it makes me so sad. And this is the first time I talked about it. You guys, I'm going to talk about it with you. I haven't said in an interview,

I haven't written it thoroughly. In my book that's coming on in February, I mentioned it, but I want to say it here with you, guys, because another way of honoring my mother is by being honest, because that's how she was. My family and I are not okay my extended family. Should I say my siblings and I think goodness were good. We have our disagreement into we have our discussions or arguments, but we always come back to

each other. But there has always been issues in my family, unfortunately, because there are so many of us in the industry. Fortunately and unfortunately, I feel that we could have been a very successful dynasty together. But I feel like jealousy and ego and greed has ruined our family for years. And I'm now ready to say that, Yeah, I'm not okay, and I know some of my siblings, and I don't want to speak for them, are also not okay with

most of our family members. Today I'll speak about myself and what I feel and how I feel and why it makes me so sad because my mom was really the glue to our family. And although for many years. She was also disappointed, and we have emails and conversations, and everyone knows this. My mom was also very vocal about things that she disagreed with with certain family members. So a lot of people have wondered why I haven't followed my grandmother. I did. Maybe it's a little silly,

maybe it's childish. I didn't follow her on Instagram. I love my grandmother. I still honor her. I still thank her very much for everything she did for me, for helping raise me. I love her so much and I miss her. But it goes back to me honoring my mother and her legacy. And my siblings are the most important thing in my life, and when you hurt them,

you hurt me. And unfortunately, my grandma has said a few things publicly that I don't agree with that I'm very hurt by about my siblings, Johnny and Jessica, mainly some things about me that I just feel are unfair to say without first telling us, so I don't agree

with it being said publicly. So now I'm publicly stating that, yes, I have unfollowed her, and I'm okay with my decision, and I love her, and I still check up on her, but there are certain things on social media that I just don't want to see and I don't want them to hurt me. I could have muted her, yes, but I I decided to unfollow her because I'm also tired of pretending. I'm I'm ready for the world to know

that we're not okay. I also don't follow my uncle Juan, and I don't follow my aunt Rosie, and I'm sure to them it doesn't doesn't matter, but to me, it's just I'm ready to show the world that there are bigger issues. You know, we have always had some type of issue or tension in our family for years, because again,

we're all in the same industry. What really I think broke the camel's back, Como Lison, is when my brother Johnny, he had been asking me to do this since was sixteen years old, when he was still under my custody. Johnny asked me to look into the finances. He said,

you know what, I'm just a little worried. There's some certain things that worry me, and I just think that we should know I never did it, because I'm like, oh my god, I just I already know they're going to think that it's me, And of course I had my doubts. Don't get me wrong, I had my doubts about it, but I just didn't want to open up a kind of worms. I had a feeling it was going to start an issue. So when Johnny turned twenty,

he said, you need to help me. Actually, this January, he said, I need you to help me get an attorney. I really want to do this. And I said, okay, fine. I told him. He asked me in in November and I said, wait, give me a few months, let me pray about it. And when he came back in January, he said, okay, I want to do it and I'm sure, and I said, okay, I have your back. So I hooked him up with an attorney. He spoke to them. He's been dealing with it himself. I can't even talk

to the attorney without his permission. So it's all been him wanting to just know what's up with the estate, with the finances, with our trust, with the businesses, and it has caused chaos. It's caused so much, even more tension in our family, and I still don't know why. But that's the truth of the matter, and I want to clear that up because it's not an audit. An audit comes from it comes legally. We didn't audit anybody.

We just asked for an accounting. Johnny asked for an accounting, as as a beneficiary, he has the right to ask for an accounting and my aunt was supposed to give that to him annually and hasn't for the past nine years. So he asked for that, and it became this big ruckus. And I don't understand why this accounting was asked for in what month, Johnny. This accounting was asked for in April of this year, and everything has gone to ship

since then, worse than it it has been. I feel that we have the right to know how much money was in the account when my mom left, how much money has been made um how much money they have made for the enterprises, for my January River enterprises. We have a right, We have a right to ask how

much people are getting paid. And I include myself in this because yes, I was disinherited, but I'm still a daughter, I'm still the oldest, I'm still the one that helped my mom build this empire, and I still have the right as a sister to ask what's going on with my siblings, with their with their finances. So let me tell you the businesses. My mom's businesses are completely separate from the trust that's where my mom left for my siblings.

The accounting was delivered months later, literally Johnny's right here. So a hundred and ninety two days later they asked for extensions. For a while, we hadn't heard from them. I was like, wait, if we have everything in order, we have a good c p A for the company, we have a good financial advisor, why aren't we getting

these things in a time we matter. I just don't understand, and there's so many things that I can say, but I just I want to be respectful to my siblings and to still my family, because even though I love them and I love them from Afar, I wish them well. I'm better off without them, and I'm sure they are as well without us or without me. Should I say? And my heart is sad, my heart is hurt. But sometimes it's better to love people from Afar and not

be angry at them. Because I'm not angry, I'm disappointed. I'm disappointed because this didn't have to turn out this way. And I just felt that today talking about my mom. The best way I can honor her is by being honest. Again, I thought about this over and over about talking about this, but you know what, because I thought about my cousins, their children. I don't want to affect anybody in any way. Ever.

God knows my intentions. God knows that I wish with all my heart that we were okay with my family and that we could all just be united and be a strong force together. But that is not our case, that is not our truth. Sadly, and you know what, everyone kind of has to just own up two certain things. And it's sad because ever since my mom left the way Johnny says it, we've been living in hell. I see it a little different. It has been very difficult.

I have tried my very best to be okay with my family, to gain their approval, to show them, hey, I'm working, I'm doing my thing, like are you proud? You know, it's been very difficult to get that. And it's just sad when you lose such a strong pillar in your family, how things just start crumbling down. And now that I look back to these nine years, it's just we were in so much pain. We just trusted blindly.

We were too hurt and dealing with our pain and with life and how to live life without my mom, without parents In reality that we didn't really care much or not care, but we just didn't have the energy or the mental space to deal with all these things. And I feel like we finally woke up and we're like, oh, wait a second, what's going on? I feel like that them,

so what's the problem. You know? I wish with all my heart that we could spend this anniversary together as a family and Grandma's house, with my uncle's, with my aunt, with my cousins. It makes me sad, but I've accepted that this is my reality, my new reality, and I've

come to peace with it and moving forward. It's just really coming together as siblings is what we want to do once my sister Jackie becomes CEO, to just continue my mother's legacy, us having the control and as a team making decisions from my mom's brand, from my mother's music.

We want a movie. We have so many ideas that I think that the best now that we're a little more healed, we're a little more mature, I think we all can just come together and make it happen, and that's what I'm hopeful for, and I'm hopeful that this doesn't get any nastier and that we could just come together and coming to an agreement, maybe agree to disagree, for the sake of my mother and her legacy and all that she worked hard for, because she did for

her children mainly and mostly, and everyone that knows her, especially her family, knows that. So that's why I'm so confused today. I want to honor my mother and ask you all, if you haven't heard her music, if you have heard it, to just please listen to it every single day. Go to any app that you guys use to listen to music. That's the way we can keep her alive is by listening to her music and just honor her in that way. For me, it's the favor

that I ask you guys. And I'm little really looking forward to the future and doing this kind of being under the umbrella again of just helping, you know, because I can't be added to the will or anything, and nor do I want to. I want my siblings to be Okay. I'm working hard and I'm doing my thing, so I just want to be able to be a part of it again and really have a real say, you know, in my mom's stuff. And I know my

siblings feel the same way. We want a movie. Imagine a movie of Jenny Rivera's life in English with a little bit of Spanish or vice versa. I don't know. I just wanted to be like the real Jenny, you

know what I mean, what she was all about. A movie just telling the story of a woman that worked her ass off to leave the imprint that she has left forever, and what she did for her kids as a single mother, everything that she went through, things that you guys may not even know, things that we've never talked about that we're ready to talk about now. We want movies. We want just huge We have huge plans.

So I think it's to be beautiful to be together at a table with my siblings and discussing everything that we want to do for my mom and how we want her music to sound. I think we're ready. We're ready, and I'm excited for my sister Jackie, who is stepping up like no other. I admire her so much. I don't know how she juggles being a mother of four, a wife, a business owner, and now dealing with all of this with Jenny Rivera Enterprises, and I'm excited to

see her in this new position. And she does everything with such with such grace and so peacefully, and she has the best intentions and the best interests at heart for everyone. So I think she's gonna be an amazing CEO, and I can't wait to see that. It's nice to know that Mom and I started all of this, because it was really Mom and I we um. We started

from the ground up. I was at home with the kids, cleaning, cooking, making sure everything was good, pay in the bills, and then later on I helped her with the businesses and helped her build her empire, and every idea that she had, I did my best to execute it. And to know that it's become this and to know that now my sister is going to take over is awesome. And I also want to take this time in the space to thank my uncle and my aunt for everything they did.

I know that they tried their best, and I know that this was thrown on my aunt from one day to another, and she really didn't know and never wanted anything to do with the music industry. So I've always been very compassionate about that and understanding and for so long. She expressed that she wasn't happy in her position and that it has ruined her her her relationship with her kids, with her with her husband. My uncle Juan felt the same way, and again, my uncle Juan wasn't left in charge.

She just took that responsibility I and wanted to help. And I am grateful for that. Believe me, I appreciate everything that they did, but there are certain things that I just feel I don't agree with, but I am grateful and I do want them to be happy, and I want them to be okay with their family and live their best life. And I'm sorry if you know all of this has caused pain, you know, the way

that we think about their feelings and their life. I would love for them to take a moment and do the same for us, you know, And I know they have. I just don't know what happened throughout these nine years, and things have just gotten worse and worse, and it's just what happened, you know, we just asked questions. I want you guys to remember her for yes, her music,

because she definitely broke barriers. She has paved the path for all women, I think in general, especially in you know, the regional Mexican genre, but also for the woman for that lucona courageous, fearless woman that she was. She always said, if they close the door in my face, it's okay, I'm going to find a window and I'm going to crawl through it and I'm gonna make sure I get what I want. So she was just tenacious and so

strong and strong willed. I want you guys to remember her for that, for the single mother of five that didn't let anyone get in her way of feeding those children. For me, even if I wasn't her daughter, I would still be a fan of her music. I would still be a fan of the woman because she's definitely a woman that represents us so well, especially latinas that when there is a will, there is a way, easy said boy.

Then she's definitely that woman. And it really was who she was, really like the person that you saw on stage, the person that you saw on interviews, That was my mother off stage in her core, she was a very passionate woman and anything and everything that she did passionate. Loving. Um, she was moody, you know, but and when she was wrong, she would eventually come around and say, I apologize, I'm sorry I was wrong. It would take her a little bit of time, but she would. She would always come

around and and apologize. She was a woman that did her best to read the Bible every single day, at least averse to make sure she was honoring God and putting him first, something that to me is super important now because I saw it so much growing up, that woman that you guys know, it's really it wasn't It wasn't a facade. It was really her and the good and the bad. Like she would say, you know, flaws and all either fect those. She really did own it

in every aspect. And I am so proud and honored and it's such a privilege and a blessing to be her daughter, to be her firstborn. It's like, Wow, that's my mama. You know, she's a badass in every sense of the word. And it's crazy because I know this, but I think I'm so engulfed in doing what I gotta do and being the best example that I can to my siblings of doing working and that sometimes not that I forget, it's just now that I'm talking about her,

I'm just like Damn, that's my mom. It's so tight, you know, And I'm so grateful and I thank God, and I hope that one day, when I have a daughter, she could be half the woman my mother was. I'm gonna name her Jenny. It might be her middle name, but it has to be Jenny. And just the way I asked you guys to listen to her music, to my mother's music and honor her and you know, keep her alive, keep her legacy alive. I also do the same.

I listen to her music a lot, especially when I need that motivation or I'm gonna go I'm gonna walk into a meeting, or when I was going through a heartbreak, I would listen too, like all those songs. Usually, what we like to do on December nine is eat your favorite foods. She liked the cookies, Nutter butters, she loved Diet coke, she loved pork rinds, and just sit there and watch her favorite movies, one of them being Life. The movie Life, if you guys haven't watched today, highly recommended.

It's super funny. Um So that's what we're gonna do. Hopefully we can be together. It's gone to a point where now. I respect my siblings are a lot older, so if they feel like they need to be alone, especially Mikey, he's the one that's always like, you know what, I want to take my time. I want to do

this by myself. I respect that I would love for all of us to be together in my new home hopefully, but if not, then I'm going to do my best to do what I do and listen to her music loud and proud, and and just remember her because I do miss her very much. It doesn't matter how old I get, I still need my mom's hugs. I still need her kisses. I still she had the best hugs ever. She was the best hugger. She always smells so good. She had this certain cent that I'm never going to forget,

and her advice. I just I need her, you know, I still need her to me. It's yeah, it's been nine years, it's gonna be ten, but it still feels like it was yesterday. And if I can give you guys a piece of advice before um we go and we close up, is honor your parents. Don't wait for a special holiday for their birthday, for Christmas, for Mother's Day, for Father's Day, to say hi, I love you, to send them flowers randomly. You just never know what will happen.

You never know when you won't see them again. So that's my advice to you guys, to appreciate and value your loved ones, to take the time to spend time with them, to call them now and then. I still do with my grandma, even though I'm hurt. If she's sick, I call her, I send her text messages. I want to make sure she knows that I'm there because I'm still grateful for everything she did for me. Things have

just changed. But that's my advice to you guys. Take care of those that you love and keep their legacy alive once they're gone. So, guys, sorry for it's a very touchy subject. It's something that I thought I was not going to talk about everything that we talked about here, but this is a safe place and a way for me to express myself and share with you guys on a deeper level, like my thoughts, my heart and my mind,

my soul, everything that I go through. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode and again December nine, let's not be sad. Yes, we miss her, but all the Jenny Rivera fans out there. Let's celebrate her life and what she taught us. Thank you guys so much. I will talk to you next week and have a beautiful, wonderful, productive week. This is a production of I Heart Radio

and Michael podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram at Michael da Podcasts and follow me checks that's c h i q u i s. For more podcasts from my heart, visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.