Happy Valentine’s Day!

the worst. I don't know how I was with him for four and a half years. Hello, my beautiful people, thank you for tuning into this week's episode of cheek Ease and Chill. Today is going to be a themed episode ahead of Valentine's Day. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day or Valentine And you know what, not all of us have a partner to share with. And that's totally okay, Okay, So yes, I have a boyfriend right now, but some of my favorite VALENTI and say, we're spent alone or

with friends or even with my sisters. So I want to dedicate today's episode to the most important kind of love, self love. I'm going to be sharing some of my favorite ways to shower yourself with love, and I might even share a couple of stories about my best and worst Valentine's Days. So let's get this episode started. This is chick ease and chill. People seem to either love

Valentine's Day or hate it. I personally like, maybe I wi you know what I mean, Like it's not like something that I look forward to, like for instance, Thanksgiving. I don't know. I want to say, like it's my least favorite holiday to be honest, but I don't mind celebrating it. Does that sound weird? I definitely don't hate it. I guess it's like the whole Valentine's Day like rush that I'm like kind of like, you know, I feel like we should celebrate love every single day, But that's

just me and I think most of us do. But I do like that we have a day that represents love and not only like love between like a significant other, but if not, like I meant that is friends. I do like that. It was so cute because my mom growing up, like when we were younger, she would always send us like flowers and cars, like if she was out of town or she would make us cute little baskets and get everything from like the nine nine cent

store and make us cute baskets. And she showed like us like we are her loves and she is our love, you know what I mean. And it was just so nice. So I'm so grateful that she did that, because it's not just like I said, about finding that one person. It's no, it's loving each other as a whole. Okay, so now that we talked about that, now let's talk about self love and ways that you can make yourself

feel extra special. First of all, there's nothing wrong with dating yourself, you guys, there's nothing wrong with taking yourself to dinner, to the movies. I feel like it takes an extra confidence to your person to do things by yourself and mind you. For a long time, I was just afraid of being alone and listening to my own thoughts. Until I've learned, well, I've healed through therapy. I've healed

a lot of things, abandonment issues, etcetera, etcetera. But I wish I would have known this in my twenties, where it's like, dude, just go to the park by yourself, like literally date yourself, like fall in love with yourself. I have gone literally on dates by myself. I have gotten dressed up, got my hair and makeup done, and I posted a picture once. It was when I was going through my divorce, and I literally got myself ready and I went to Morton's, Okay, a steakhouse, and I

had a beautiful dinner by myself. People thought I was dating someone else, and I swear to you, I did not go with anyone. It was a complete date by myself. Put that on like my mother's memory, I have no reason to lie. And it felt so empowering to sit there and people, of course stared because I was looking cute.

I had like a cute ass out fit, my hair, makeup was done, and I was sitting there just having a drink, having some wine by myself, had my steak, and people did stare because there was no one else by themselves. And it wasn't a special occasion. It wasn't Valentine's Day. It was just a random ass day that I wanted to take myself out. I've gone to the movies by myself. It's a little harder now that you know. I'm cheeky, as I guess you could say, and I

forget to be honest, Sauce. I just want to continue to do that stuff. So it's a little harder, but I still do it. Put on my beanie, that put on my hoodie. Even if I have a boyfriend. I think it's super important to still nurture that side of yourself and be okay with embracing those alone moments. So anyways, by yourself, flowers, I do that all the time, handy like, and not only that, if you feel like on Valentine's Day you don't have that person or you know, like

it's hey, I'm gonna go by myself an outfit. Okay, I'm gonna go buy myself a damn outfit. I want to look good. By yourself a gift. I love doing that. I love buying myself kiss I'm like, you know what, I worked hard this week. I'm gonna go get myself something special. This year, I'm working on being a little bit more frugal. You guys all like I'm trying to like invest it, so I'm trying not to do that as much. But there's nothing wrong with splurging on yourself.

You work hard, you deserve it, and it just makes you feel good, you know. I don't know. I mean, that's just that's my two cents. I think too many people are afraid and to like worried about finding that person that you're so worried about finding that person that you lose focus of like what's really important, like looking within.

And I think a lot of people, a lot of us, and I include myself, we are afraid of looking within because we're afraid of hearing what it is that we need to change, what it is that we need to be better at. And I think when you have those moments of silence is when you learn the most about yourself. And you should not be embarrassed. I'm telling you. It takes a badass bitch, even a guy, to go somewhere by themselves. Like it's like, yeah, I love myself that much.

I'm gonna walk in this bitch in this restaurant and I'm gonna sit here. I got this, And you never know, maybe some guys there with his friends and walks up to you. Just never know what can happen. The universe is always always working. Okay. Oh. Another thing that I love to do is if you don't want to go out, you don't have to go out, Like have a movie

night by yourself watching. There's so much stuff on Netflix right now, you guys like put on your pjs as one of the things I love to do is I put on my favorite comfy pjs order like in you know now they have like these pizzas that are like heart shape. If you're like into that, I think it's cute. I would do it. I'm very like that's so me, So I don't know. I mean, I think like having a bottle of wine, champagne, some tequila and a pizza,

watching your favorite movie and comfy as clothes. Dude, that sounds so delicious, Like, ah, do you know I might do that? Actually, that sounds really nice because it's like I like Valentine's. They don't get me wrong, but it's it's like sometimes I just want to chill, you know, Like I don't want to necessarily get dressed up all the time. I just want to like be lazy. And that's fun too. So don't I feel like you need to get dressed up and Invalentine's I gotta take a

picture for Instagram. It's just as cool to take a picture and post that I'm sitting here and enjoying my couch my home, this pizza. Okay. Another thing you can do is a spawn day. Spat days are always a good idea, even if it's not like a big spat, like a big name brand type of spall, like a Burke Williams. I love Berquilliams, but like it could be like one of those like those small boutique little like

massage places. I love the Asian ones. I always go to the Asian ones and it's very inexpensive and very good massages. So even like to get like an hour of just pampering yourself in that way. If you want to do a full lass spall day, then do it.

That's always nice. But I think that that's another way of pampering yourself of just like putting your phone away because a lot of spats don't allow you to have your phone and just being with yourself and just sitting there in the sauna or sitting in like the jipouzy and just giving yourself that gift of a nice facial, of a massage, or maybe not even getting a massage or official just using the amenities at the spa. I love that. Sometimes they're like twenty bucks just to use

the amenities. So it's like, you know, it's just like looking it. I always say that get up with it. Where there's a will, there's a way. It sounds clichet, you guys, but it's it's the truth. Or you can also draw a bath, put some like Epstein salt, relax the muscle, some like lavender oil, eucalyptus, put on some candles, like make something very romantic for yourself. Get a little glass of wine or a tea or whatever it is it's going to make you happy, and just sit there.

Sometimes I just like to put like meditation music in my bathroom light some candles, put my hair up, and just sit in some warm water. That's a beautiful way of also pampering yourself and enjoying Valentine's Day and not worried about being in the rush of Valentine's Day or just any day. That's part of self love, you guys. It's not just like people think, oh, self love, it's selfish. It's just you, you, you you, you, yes, and no self love.

It really starts with you. When you know how to be with yourself and love yourself and shower yourself with love, it's so much easier to give it to other people, but also with the balance of knowing, wait, I'm not giving too much of myself either. It's that balance, you guys. Everything, it's the ying and the yang of life. And I'm telling you it's just it's a game changer. So nice little bath once a week is awesome. Twice a week, relax, Like, honestly,

I think it's I need to do that more often. Actually, I really need to like take a bath maybe tonight. I've had, like I said earlier, I've had Galantine's Days where I've invited my friends over were all single, and

I did on on the reality show. Actually, um and I had all my friends over and we had a Valentine'sday party, a Galentine's Day party, and I got up being at that and at that time there was this guy that totally broke my heart and I was, of course, between like the drinks, I was crying, but I was also hidden being at that. I was happy to be

with my friends, so that was cool. And maybe through a little party, to you guys, you could have a little get together with your friends that are single, and even if they're not single, still like celebrate love, you know what I mean. So look it togethers are always fun. Okay. So those are just a few things that I feel you can do. If you don't have a significant other, you are your significant other. You are the best partner and the most loyal and committed partner that you're going

to have for the rest of your life. Just remember that. Okay. If you know no one is going anywhere in your life, it's you, So make sure you take care of you and pamper yourself. And hopefully those things helped and you know, some ideas out there. So now I want to tell you guys about my best and worst Valentine's Day. So all my Valentine's Day, honestly, they've been pretty good. I

can't necessarily pick one that's been like the best. I'm telling you because I spent a lot of Valentine's Day by myself, especially like I had a boyfriend that he was horrible, never like at least a little like edible arrangement or something like hey, like he it was just he was the worst. I don't know how. I was with him for four and a half years, so I had like that extreme of like Valentine's Day was just not important to him, and he would totally forget and

just wouldn't send me anything. I had to remind him, which is super embarrassing. And then there was another guy that was like super extravagant and over the top and said it not as in a bunch of flowers, and it was nice. So yeah, I've had nice Valentine's Day

alone and not alone. And my worst Valentine's Day going back to like the Galentine's Day that I had at my house, um, with my friends, it stemmed from this guy that I'm about to tell you guys, there's this guy and I want to say his name, but I was like totally head over heels for him. I was infatuated. It wasn't even love. We weren't even ever in a relationship. UM a lot older. He was like eleven years older

than me. When I met him at this club, Spanish club that I would go to and I would just go there because he was like the head of security guards. And anyways, I became friends with his sister and him. You know, his sister and I are still friends actually

to this day. So anyways, I was like head over heels for this guy for like two years and he would like, you know, streaming along and one ft in, one foot out, and it was like, no, I don't want a girlfriend and this and that, but I like you is that kind of thing, you know, And all while he was talking to this other girl who he's still with you guys, by the way, she's very pretty. She's younger than me. So anyways, that day that Valentine's Day, I was waiting like a mensa, thinking, oh my god,

he's gonna like ask me for valin Time's Day. And I remember telling my mom was like, you know, I might have plans tonight, you know, he might ask me. And I was like waiting and waiting. I'm like, oh my god, it's two o'clock he has and said anything. Oh my god, it's four p m. Hasn't said anything.

And then this girl like at night. Then by that time, by like when I was like, I realized he's not going to ask me to do anything on Valentine's Day because he always was that type of guy that would like try to like call me and text me at night. It was that kind of thing, you girls, you know what I'm talking about. He was like totally total boy. Anyways, I never got a text from him if anything. He

just said, like, yet that the happy Valentine's Day. I hope you have a beautiful when I was like what. So then I find out that night, like around ten pm, he had gone to dinner with a bunch of couples and took this girl. That's when I found out about this girl that he's still with. And one of the girls was like, Hey, I just want to tell you that you need to just drop this guy. He just got to dinner with all of us with this girl.

I was expecting you and he got to dinner with this other girl, and I was like, oh, I was heartbroken. I was like, I cannot with my life. I just thought my whole life was just gonna like be over. It was the worst. And I found out on Valentine's Day that he had been dating this girl at the same time and they're still together. And what he told me was, you're just you know, you're older, and I want a younger girl because I want to be able to mold her, and you have great things about you.

But because of course, I confronted him about it, and this is the spill that he gave me. So I was eleven years younger than him. You guys, but he still wanted someone younger than me so that he can control her. That's basically what he told me. Anyways, peace and loved to him. I know he wants this, he always will and I'm just kidding. But anyways, I was, I think the worse because it was on Valentine's. It was devastating and it hurt me for a long time,

like for a year. I think I was single after that for a year, and then the next Valentine's I was still crying about it. I was just like, so it had hurt my ego so much. You guys, That's when I had the whole get together with my friends because he would still try to talk to Hi. I'm like, oh, you have a girlfriend, stop go away. But anyways, I

just had to get that off my chest. So anyways, we're over that, and yeah, I just needed to share that because you guys, just like you, I'm sure a lot of us have had those moments, those weak moments, and from those moments, we learned and we grow and ain't no man ever gonna do that to me again. No, that's all I needed that one lesson. I learned my lesson. Anyways, we were talking about the best and the worst, and I was like, Okay, I can't really pick one of

the best. But last year, last year's Valentine's Day was so freaking beautiful, you guys. It was my first Valentine's Day with Emilia and he did like this whole thing in the living room and did like made this big ball, big tree of just a bunch of roses. It was so beautiful and I'll never forget because it was like

our first Valentine's Day. And I'm telling you, I'm not that girl that's like you have to do something fucking beautiful and extravagant in this whole thing for Valentine's Day, because I'm just like, I'm over that part of it. I get it. Like for a while I was that, but I'm no longer that. So anyways, I was just wasn't expecting it. It is so freaking beautiful. So now that I think about it, I'm like, I love that

Valentine's Day. So this year, we're gonna keep it more chill, Like we're gonna go to Fashion Week and probably do dinner. But I'm not expecting anything crazy, and I, you know what, don't feel the pressure. I personally, don't of like having to show, Oh, my partner did something huge or I did something huge, or we need to take cute little pictures for Instagram. Like that's another thing that I'm just

like so over like if it happens cool. I wanted to be organic, but I do see that a lot of people plan it just for social media, and that just doesn't feel authentic to me. So I'm just more of like being authentic and whatever happens in the moment, if I feel it in my heart, I'm going to

post it. If not, I'll keep it to myself. I've learned throughout the years to keep things to myself as well, to savor it a little bit more because I don't want everyone's opinions and it's just like, oh it wasn't big enough for it's too small, or it's people always have an opinion. So anyways, I don't know, maybe you guys will see I'll post something tomorrow. But any ways, I hope you guys enjoyed this episode, this Galantine's episode, and I hope you guys all have a beautiful Valentine's Day.

Remember it is for your friends. And yeah, I mean, love is such a beautiful thing. And I hope each and every one of you have a really special one like I really really do. It doesn't matter if you're in a relationship, if things are complicated, or if you're single. You're the most important person in your life. So show yourself some love, you guys, because you deserve it. You deserve it. Keep telling yourself that I am worthy, I

am receptive, I deserve it. Okay, So before we go, you know, we always end with a beautiful motivational quote. So I have a couple for you guys. First, one note to self. You don't have to be good enough for people to love you. Be good enough for yourself for you to love you. Wow, you don't have to be good enough for people to love you. Be good enough for yourself for you to love you. M M snappy snappy Okay. So one more taking care of your own means and not sacrificing your well being to please

others that self love you, guys. Not settling for less than you deserve. Not settling to settle. It's a very important one. So people just getting relationships just to settle, and they stay in them to settle because they want to settle. So anyways, self love, taking care of your own needs, and not sacrificing your well being to please others. Let's play it bueno. I'm wishing you all a very happy Valentine's Day. I love you also so so much, and I can't wait to talk to you guys next week.

And talking about next week, we have a very special guest on the pod and it's seriously one of my favorite episodes. You can't miss it. It's with my sister Jacqueline, so please listen to it. We cried, we laughed, it was just beautiful. So I'll see you then. Do you need advice on love of relationships, health, imas? I'm so excited to share with you that my Cheeks and Chill podcast will have an extra episode drop each week. I'll be answering all your questions. Just leave me a voice message.

All you have to do is go to speak pipe dot com slash Cheeks and Chill Podcast and record your questions. I can't wait to hear from you. This is a production of I Heart Radio and the Michael da podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram at Michael Dura Podcasts and follow me chicks. That's c h I q U I s. For more podcast from My Heart, visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast, and check us out on YouTube. The pup