Hello, everyone, it's your girl Cheeky's and you've reached the voicemail box for Dear Cheeky's. I'm here to give you advice on anything and everything you need help with. Maybe you're going through a breakup, maybe you're having issues with your family, or maybe you need help figuring out how to balance your checkbook or how to start a business, whatever the cases, I want to hear from you. Remember
these are my thoughts and opinions. And if you're suffering from an issue or hardship, you should seek help from a qualified professional. All right, Now, go ahead and leave your question at the sound of the beat.
Hi, Cheeky's, I just wanted to ask you, how did you manage taking care of your siblings and raising them pretty much for your whole life. How did you balance your work life and your relationships while also taking care of your siblings. Because I am currently taking care of
my Thea, and she has breast cancer. And when I heard the news, and I was even given a dream that she was gonna be diagnosed with breast cancer, and I feel like it's been put on me by God to take care of her and kind of prepare me for this because of how close we are, but I'm starting to feel a little bit overwhelmed and just like the weight of her situation is all on me, and
I feel like I'm drowning. So I just wanted to ask, how did you manage to take care of your siblings and also keep your sanity and not feel so overwhelmed. I know that you have because I've watched your shows everything, But what tips can you give me to help relieve that or make it better?
Victoria? What a beautiful human being. Wow.
I know it's a difficult situation taking the responsibility for someone else's life like I did with my siblings. When I was in the moment living that, there were times of frustration and I was just like, why why am I the oldest? Why do I have such responsibility? Why can't I just be a normal sixteen year old that goes out with her friends. And I'm not going to say that I didn't complain about it. There were times that,
I mean I did, like a lot. You know now as years have passed and I understand Even then, I was like, I know I'm doing God's work. I know this is what I'm supposed to do. Like I felt what you feel like you're like, Okay, God wants me to do this, but that doesn't mean that everything that God wants us to do is going to be easy. First of all, what you're doing is beautiful and there's a big, huge blessing that's coming to your life. I
don't doubt that at all. But I know you are like in the middle of it, and and it's a lot. So I'm sending you a big hug first of all, a big, big hug full of light, because I can hear it and I can feel what you're feeling. I don't know if you work out, but that will definitely help. I know it sounds silly, but working out and sweating and releasing that's why I love boxing so much, because boxing has helped me just release frustration and tension and
stress just hitting something. I even told Johnny yesterday. My brother I was like, he was feeling fresh, and I said, go upstairs and hit the punching bag. You need to just let it out, go yell sometimes.
You know what I used to do that.
I used to go in my backyard and yell loud at like just let it out, and then you feel better. It's because you have a lot of tension in your body and that's okay. It's a lot that you're doing, but you also need to release. So what are positive ways of releasing? Yelling out loud by yourself in your backyard, outside, hitting a punching bag, working out, doing cardio, prayer. You guys know I'm a huge woman of faith. Leave in prayer and meditation and just quieting down your mind. Of course,
therapy to help you through the situation. But more than anything, knowing and telling yourself every day I am doing God's work. God, give me the strain, give me the wisdom, give me the courage to keep on doing this because what you're doing is a beautiful thing. You're being selfless and I know it's a lot, but I promise you just knowing that God has something amazing for you. And I know you're not doing it for that, but just know, just know that you're doing something good and that your thea
I'm sure absolutely appreciates it. So you are there because you're meant to be there. Tell yourself every single day and breathe deep intentional breathing helps Victoria. Wow, I hope like get to meet you and day Okay, sending you another big, big hugs. Thank you so much for your question, and I really hope that I was able to help. All right, So our next question comes from Cecilia.
Hi, Janee, congratulations on your engagement. I had a question though. You mentioned in your book as well as previous episodes that you felt unsure and easy, just something telling you that you were not making the right choice by marrying Lorenzo, and you just mentioned that you kind of were feeling the same thing about Emilio. Do you think this is a sign is it different? If so, how how do you know that it's not, you know, like that instinct
that is just not right. I'm honestly curious because I have a lot of things happening and I just I don't know how to differentiate between my gut instinct and just my anxiety or fear. Thank you, congrats again.
Hi Cecilia, thank you. I really like your question. I appreciate it very much. Here's the thing.
From the very beginning of my relationship with Zoe, I knew something was off. I felt it in my spirit. Sometimes what I do is I close my eyes and I ask myself, okay, do I have peace.
With this decision?
And I don't know how to explain it, and it's going to be very hard for me to verbalize it. But it's something that you just feel in your chest and you're tummy where you're just like you feel relaxed. When you ask yourself, do I have peace with this? And you feel tension and your chest tightens up and your tummy like doesn't feel right, that's when you know your spirit, your soul is telling you this isn't good
for you. And that's a thing with that relationship. Without taking anything away from it, because again, I learned so much from my past, and I'm grateful with my past. I just knew he wasn't ready, and that's okay. He wasn't ready, and I knew it.
I just knew.
I was like, I know that I'm ready to give my all and to make this work and to do things the right way. But I just know, I'm like, he's not. There are still things that he wants to do. He wants to still party and do things that I'm just not okay with. And I found myself having more sad days and more anxiety, and I was frustrated and irritated, and it was just so many negative emotions that I'm like, this isn't good. It's really really taking a toll on me.
And I just stood in the relationship for the lack of not being alone. I guess you could say that's a codependency thing that I've been working on my whole life, but it felt different now with Emilio. The only reason I thought of letting him go was because I felt that I wasn't being my best self. Maybe or I felt like I was being my best self, like I was doing everything and I could to make the relationship work, but I felt like maybe it's just not enough, and
I felt like, Okay, maybe I don't deserve him. But when he asked me to marry him, I felt like, oh my god, he's absolutely ready. I'm ready. You know I'm ready. We want the same things, like I know that he's not going to disappear on me at night and I can't get a hold of him for hours, like he doesn't do things like that, like he I don't know. I just have peace. And I asked myself and I'm like, I feel happy. I feel happy. I want to go look at venues like it's just so different.
Not that I wasn't excited before, but I just don't know how to explain it. And now I'm just like, oh my god, this feels just like happy and just bright and light and we're on the same page.
I don't know, he's just ready. And it's hard.
It's hard to answer your question because it's just a feeling that you get. But I would suggest for you to just ask yourself, do I have peace with this decision? Is this bringing me more happiness? Or is it bringing me more sadness, more anxiety, more tension in my chest. That's where you kind of have to weigh it out and write down the pros and the cons of what. I don't know the situation that you're going through. But
that's the best advice I can give you. So I hope it helps, and I hope I was able to answer your question. You know, hopefully that was clear. Okay, So our next question comes from Abel.
Hey Chieky's is me Abel from Houston, Texas, salus Hey. I want to know if it's true l alas shady Bay. I'm pretty sure a lot of people are asking you.
This, but jeez, man, Abel, I love it. We don't get a lot of guys on here, so Thank you so much. Shout out to h Town, Houston.
Thank you for your question.
Okay, guys, so what he's asking me is if I'm going to pay for a BBL for Shoddy Bay.
Shoddy Bay.
Y'all don't know who she is, go look her up on TikTok. She's huge on TikTok. But yeah, Shoddy is an influencer. She's so she's so funny. Honestly, she makes me laugh. She's just and she's so sweet. She's such a sweetheart.
But to answer your.
Question able is the bussy Olsah? I mean, if she wants me to, I definitely will. We did talk about it, and I just for me, it's important for her to get all her tests done, like her blood work, check her heart, make sure she's healthy and ready for it. But if that's what's going to make her happy and I can support her, I'm all about like if you want to get surgery, plastic surgery do y'all. Thanks so Able, you know it's all good. You're so funny. I love
your question, but yes I would. I got to talk to her actually about it. So thank you Able for your questions. Okay, So our last question comes from Yenni, what.
Do you see you struggled with the most growing up?
Oh, I like your questions straight up and just direct. Thank you, Yenni.
Okay, So, if I had to choose one thing, I think the biggest thing that I struggled with growing up was not speaking up. Damn that end is creating boundaries, like you know, knowing how to say no.
It was the biggest thing.
Like even when something didn't feel comfortable with my sexual abuse, you know, for my dad, or just certain things at school or boys were mean like I just things that I just wouldn't say anything, Like I wouldn't speak up because I didn't want to disappoint anyone. And that's the worst thing that we could do, because when we do that,
then we disappoint ourselves and we're unhappy. So now that I've gotten older and it took me a long time to be honest to speak up and feel strong enough, I guess, or brave enough to just say no, I don't like that, or that doesn't make me happy or I don't have peace with that decision. Now it feels good to be able to say, you know what, I don't like that, I'm okay, I can't go, or I
don't want to go. Or before it was like, let me try to make every event and let me try to do everything to make everyone happy, and it's just like, oh, how is a people pleaser?
That's probably what what it is. I struggled with being.
A people please their Oh my goodness, yes, well yeah, thank god, that ain't the case no more. But it's just we have so many influences when we're growing up. It's like, you know, we we want to fit in, We want to be part of the cool crowd. We don't want to disappoint. We want everyone's approval. So it's like the only approval and the most important one is yourself and you being happy and being at peace. And wow, if the faster and the sooner you learn that, you guys,
the better. So Yeahni, thank you for your question because you just made me reflect right now, like, oh, I'm on the right track.
I'm doing good.
Book at them, Cecilia. I love hearing from you guys. You guys make me so happy, and I hope I make you happy too. You can leave me your questions at speakpipe dot com. Slash Cheeky is in chill. I'll see you guys, on the next one, Los Pira Mucho. This is a production of iHeartRadio and the Microdura podcast Network.
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