Hello, everyone, it's your go Cheeky's and you've reached the voice mailbox for Dear Cheeky's. I'm here to give you advice on anything and everything you need help with. Maybe you're going through a breakup, maybe you're having issues with your family, or maybe you need help figuring out how to balance your checkbook or how to start a business. What arever the cases I want to hear from you.
Remember these are my thoughts and opinions, and if you're suffering from an issue or hardship, you should seek help from a qualified professional. All right, now, go ahead and leave your question at the sound of the beat.
Hi Cheekies, I am from Florida. I'm actually Brazilian. I'm not Mexican, but I love your music. I love your mom's music. She was actually the first person that I ever heard in the skin music world. I actually married him Mexican as well, so he's the one that kind of put me on. But my question to you is how can I embrace my feminine side. I feel like I'm just this big, tough girl that will woman because I was raised with my brother, you know, he taught
me how to be tough. My dad taught me how to be tough, and I just feel like I'm just so tough for I just want to be soft, Like I want to be that girly. I want to be more feminine. I want to be you know, very cute, very all this stuff and very aesthetic in a way. I just don't want to be this person that's all big and bad, you know, like I'm just I just want to be more feminine. And you know, I love getting my nails done, my hair is done. I just feel like there's there's more that I just don't know
how to lock in. And I mean, I have no problem being Jinoona as fun, but you know, like I just want to be more feminine too, you know, like I drive big trucks, I do all this stuff. I work in construction. I don't want that to overpower me and overpower my feminine So how can I change? Girl?
You are a badass, Melissa, first of all. And I really want to go to Brazil. Have you been to Brazil? I want to go to Brazil anyways, But I'm glad that you, you know, love the mexicanos. Okay, I think it's pretty bad ass that you drive a truck and that you work in construction girl, Like, whoa. I don't think there's anything wrong with a woman being I guess tomboyish for the lack of a better word. I think that that's attractive. You know. Yes, I understand that you
want to be more feminine. I get that. I had to learn because I would always step into like my masculine energy. And if you want to be in a relationship with a man, you have to learn to be a little more cutesy, you know, and de mirror with how you speak and certain things. So I've had to learn myself. I love the fact that you get your nils down, you love to get your hair done, all that good stuff. Do you wear dresses? Maybe we're high heels. Have you ever taken an etiquette class? I think an
etiquet class would be cool. I want to take one, actually, I think etiquet classes will definitely help with kind of being more in touch with that feminine side. But I think if you work around dudes all the time and everything, like, it's gonna be a little hard. But again, there's nothing wrong with that. I think that's actually, like I said, really sexy. But try etiquette classes. Another thing would be music, like very sexy music that's gonna make you like feel
like in touch with your like feminine side. Meditation too. You guys know, I'm a huge advocate for meditation and therapy, but medication could definitely help you, like if you are focusing on the feminine energy for it to be downloaded. It'll take some time because I think you are who you are and you shouldn't want to change that completely. But you can step into your feminine a little bit, for sure, But I don't know I'm going to look into that, but hopefully my advice helped a little bit
or helps a little bit keep us updated. I'd love to hear from you again, Melissa, but I think you sound like a pretty bad ass girl, so don't try to change too much. Okay. Next question comes from Chantell.
Hey, Cheeky's a Chantal. You've answered a few of my questions in the past, but I have a new question for you. So, I was going through TikTok and I saw that scene where your mom had her taco truck. First of all, that was so iconic. I think seeing you and your cousin and I think Johnny in the back almost falling while she was driving is just absolutely
hilarious and awesome. However, just hearing how all the fans were talking about how good the tacos were and how she like shut the people up in the radio saying that no, this isn't ever real taco because she had lettuce in them made me crave it. So my question is, would you and your siblings ever consider making a taco truck and your mom honor you know, seeing that you guys are her kids, you guys probably have the same saasle that she did. So I'm just curious because I'm
a foodie. Anyways, girl, love you keep doing you, sending love your way.
Hi. Oh you're still cute, Chantell. It's funny because when I read your name, I thought, I know that I've said this name a couple of times. So thank you so much for being a fan of Dear Cheeky's. We appreciate you very much. Round them applause for Chantelle. Guys please who It's like ten of us in here right now, So thank you Chantelle. And talking about tacos. Oh my gosh, dude, A lot of people don't know this. My mom was a pretty good cook. She didn't cook often, but when
she did, it was delicious. And I have the recipe to that salsa because the salsa on top of the tacos is what made the taco because yes, they were very, very different. It's like meat, lettuce, granma, a little bit of guesso, and then the salsa. Delicious. I've never thought about opening up that truck again, but it's not a bad idea. Maybe we should call it like a Jenny Taco or something like that, like if we I don't know, I have to talk to my siblings. But I definitely
I like the idea. I like the idea. I will definitely think about it. Said definitely three times, but definitely. I I like the question, so let me think. But they are really good. Those talkers were really good. I missed my mom's cooking. And the lintwer two was kind of like like grilled a little bit like not grilled, but like anyways, they're really good. So yeah, maybe I'll talk to my cousin. Maybe she'll do it. We'll see. Okay, thank you Chantelle again for your question. We love you
all right, So third question comes from Kate. Let's see what Kate has to say.
Hi, Tiki's I'm just gonna say my name's Kate to keep it kind of anonymous. First and foremost, I wanted to say that I love you and I love what you're doing, because I think it's hella inspirational to give people the opportunity to get advice from you. My first
question kind of relates to your book Bed Alone. I went through a similar situation as you did as a child from ages eight to sixteen, at the hands of my older brother's best friend, and nobody knew about it until I was forced to tell my mom when I was sixteen and struggling at school. I'm twenty three now and I still struggle a lot. But since it's super taboo in our culture to talk about things like that, me and my mom only talked about it that one
time and that was it. So now that I'm twenty three, I'm being pressured to be in relationships and stuff. My mom was always asking me, like why is your relationships failing? Why does it never last?
And stuff?
But I feel like when I get to the point of intimacy, I get scared, and you mentioned that in your book, so I was wondering how you got over that. Like even the word sex makes me uncomfortable. I feel like every man I'm ever talking to, that's all they want, even though half the time it's probably not. But I'm
always self sabotaging. And I just wanted to know how you got over that and your point of view from now from when you wrote the book, because I know you say how you got over it in the book, but I just wanted to know, like what you're thinking now, what's kind of like your view of it and stuff. But I don't know, I just feel really pressured and just wondering what you're thinking. But anyways, thank you so much. I love you.
Bye.
Kate. Thank you first of all for your question, and I understand do you change in your name? I totally get that. I respect it. You sound like a very very smart young lady. First of all, you're very young, so be patient with yourself, be compassionate with yourself. This is not something that is going to heal or maybe ever go away. I'm still dealing with it, you know. I just saw my dad for the first time and I don't know how many years, seventeen years, and I
thought I was over it, so it takes some time. Again, you're very young. Don't let anybody pressure you. I think you need to talk to your mom and tell her. Please, Mom, because you're still so young. Your twenties are when you're supposed to just really figure out who you are, what you want to do in life. There is absolutely no rush, and I think you need to tell your mom. Can you just in other words, lay off a little bit in a nice way, respectful way, of course, But I'm
not ready to date. I don't want a date. Do you remember? Maybe you shoul tell her mom? Do you remember what happened to me? I know you don't really like to talk about it, but that's something I'm still dealing with. So I would really appreciate if you would just have patience and give me the time that I need. I don't know if you've already started therapy, but therapy
is something that definitely helped me. And what you say about guys just wanting sex, that's for a long time what I thought I and that's why I went as far as like saying if girls was something that I wanted to do, and I tried that for a year and then I realized that I like guys. I think it's just also finding the right person. It took me so long to find the right person to make me feel comfortable and step into my sexuality. And you know,
it just it takes time. You have to hear be patient with yourself as well, and earlier I said to be compassionate, like this is a process. This is not something you could be like, oh, I'm over it. It's gonna take some time, so don't rush anything and wait until you will find that person that's going to make you feel comfortable. And it took me so many years. You know, I had to kiss a lot of froggies to finally get my prints. So you know, just take
your time and go to therapy. Do therapy. Therapy help me a lot life coaching. Therapy and life coaching are very different, so try therapy then life coaching, and that will definitely help you. And I know that SA affects all of us in different ways, so we can't compare ourselves to someone else's process, and you know, vice versa. It's just the first step is being self aware. And you sound very, very in tune with your feelings. You sound like a very smart young lady, so be proud
of that you're aware of what's happening. I think it's just you vocalizing to your mom and to anyone else that is pressuring you, because you shouldn't feel pressure to be in a relationship. Again, you're very young, so I think just putting that to the side and vocalizing it and letting people know where you are is going to give you power and that room and that space, that soul space to step into your own and to heal this because you can and you will.
You will.
I promise you. This will make you a stronger person and it will help you help other people. I think when you start looking at it from the outside in and saying, Okay, how can I with this experience when I went through something that was so traumatic and hurt me very much, how can I help others? That just changes things And that's what helped me as well, just
survive that from survivor to thriver, you know. So with all those things that I said, I hope that I was able to help you and just know that I'm with you. I understand what you're going through and not alone. Tell your mama. I think that's going to help you a lot, because we really care about what our parents say, and I think that that's probably what's really causing you and it's affecting you, So have the conversation with your mom bim and keep us updated. Please thank you everyone
for listening to Dear Cheeky's and for watching. We appreciate you very much and we will catch you on the next episode of Dear Cheeky's. If you have any questions of your own and you'd like to, you know, have me answer them, go ahead and go on speakpipe dot com. Slash chiekis in Chill podcast. That is speakpipe dot com. Slashiggis in Chill podcast. I love you guys, Peace and love peace, Peace and love what peace. This is a
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