Erin's Story - Moving Through Loss - EMDR - Part 2

motivational. I can't imagine what she went through the fact that she sought action, and put our plan into place, she was able to be free, free from her pain, free from the controlling thoughts and emotions of such a deep loss. Take a listen. The majority of people are great clients for EMDR. It moves through integrating where we want to be with our beliefs that hold us back from where we want to get to. And it's a type of therapy that integrates those

thought processes. And shifts our thinking very quickly. So most people would not do it then because I don't want to run, you know, recommend or suggest something without letting them know. Here's the disclaimer. Yeah, right. Right. Right. Right. Well, I think anybody could be assessed by a therapist for it. But I would say that like somebody, I would not do it as somebody, let's say who actively psychotic, like actively hallucinating in my office?

Somebody? Yeah, I would want to make sure they're stable, right?

Somebody who is actively under the influence. There's protocols to help with eating disorder. There's protocols to help with obsessive, obsessive compulsive disorder not know this. Yes. Yes, there. There's protocols for anxiety, panic disorder. There is protocols there. I mean, there's protocols for all kinds of mood disorder. There's protocols for there's past future present protocol protocols. That's typically where we start is Past, Present Future. Sorry. We have obsessive

compulsive protocols. We have typical depression protocols. We have 14 protocols, body dysmorphic protocols, 14, post partum protocols. I mean, there's just saying, yeah, yeah. So I mean, it just depends on what your birth trauma protocols. I had great success with somebody who is pregnant, and she had had a very traumatic previous delivery, and was having so much anxiety about her upcoming delivery. She had not intended on getting pregnant again. In fact, she had her

tubes tied, failed her. Yeah. Money Back. Doctor and say, Okay, write me a check for college challenges gonna say you can pay recall. Yes, she was so super sweet. And because it was such a surprise anyway. Because the last birth had been so traumatic. So we did a whole like we process the past. And then we did a lot of time on a future template of what is this going to look like? And what could we what

resourcing could we do? What could we, what could we work on installing as far as sights and sounds and smells that our husband could support her because she was having a plan C section. So you know, installing, how she could soothe herself and how she could picture it in the future tense thing for someone to have to be able to do to sort of, you know, like, redline it like, we're not, we're not carrying this anymore. The future is going to be brighter. And we're going to

actually draw the line here. And we're going to do we're going to actually do the work and we're going to change our future. For the better what a gift. Well, let me tell you, so I'm not even sure I've told you this Carrie, um, I'm not sure I've told you how I came to love EMDR. So, no, okay. So, the way I was introduced to EMDR was when I know I know, you know this story, but um, so my second daughter 15 months old, died in a drowning. And I was working in the ER, I was doing trauma work

at the time. And I found out 10 days later that I was pregnant. So with my middle daughter, My grace. So I was obviously all over my body. Yeah. My eye was a mess. I had to somehow handle my grades, get ready for a new baby. And I wanted to be the most present mom, I could, I had a three year old, a three and a half year old. Oh my goodness, I can't even imagine walking through that. It was a really, really dark

time. And thankfully, the therapist I saw I was seeing a psychiatrist after, after she passed away, I was referred to a psychiatrist. When I found out I was pregnant, I found. Let me tell you this. So the way I found out I was pregnant was I knew I wasn't sleeping. I knew I needed to go get something for sleep, because I hadn't slept and I don't know, eight days or something like that. Like we're not slept, I was a mess. And I knew I was already that late for

my period. And I was like, huh, a doctor is not going to prescribe me something if I'm pregnant. Right. So I need to do a pregnancy test because I know they're going to ask me when my last period was, and I'm already late. And I want to go get medicine. So I took a pregnancy test so that I could go get sleep medicine. That's how I felt that I was pregnant. And all the while you also have a three year old. Yeah. Yeah. That you haven't, you know, that's yours. Yeah, and the excitement, but also

Yes. Yet the terror and the fear of having another baby and then you was all of it? Yeah. So like had to be did it need to be, like, postponed a bit like compartmentalize like all this in nine months? Kind of a thing? Because I feel like that's where my brain would go would be like, Okay, I'm pregnant. But we're going to talk about this in nine months. I think I could do both.

Yeah, I don't think I even I honestly feel like I put off celebrating the pregnancy until I had dealt with my grief more. Because I had to, I was so conflicted. And I praise God and thank Him every day for my grace. She's one of the biggest blessings in my life. And I say I have a hard time with. Everything happens for a reason. Because I have a hard time making sense out of that loss in my life. Yeah, but I can say that we choose to bring reason to what happens in our life, for comfort sake.

Or, you know, just for our own personal meaning. I mean, what what happened from there was, I got EMDR and it changed my life. I mean, I couldn't look at the pool. I couldn't bathe my daughter I couldn't standing at the kitchen sink was horrifying for me because the running water in the pool and like none of that. And EMDR very quickly recovered me from that. How long did it take you? How many treatments did you go to? When you start feeling like you were having a benefit?

Oh, um, I want to say in less than 10 treatments. I had my daughter Emma back at swim lessons. Oh, you're kidding. I thought like you're gonna say in 10 treatments. I started to turn a corner like intention. It's like you're back at the pool. Yeah, no, I was able to have I mean, I wasn't in the water. But I was able to get around it. And I was able to sit and lobby and swim lessons. And, you know, I had grace. And then two and a half years later, I

had Bridget. And Grace did infant survival swim lessons. And by Bridget, I trained and then I was an infant survival swim teacher. For eight years. I taught tons and tons and tons of babies survival swimming. No, I have taught it out of my home. I tell them lots of babies. That is such a powerful Look at that. I mean, that's what I'm talking about Aaron, that's actually there. You've just turned it around and gave

back. Well, that's recovering from the what I imagined would be just the most intense trauma. I could fathom myself as a pet worst nightmare of yours. And then you literally go through this process. And this is what comes out on the other end and you're giving back and how many children you're potentially saving. But I mean, you're actually walking in the water and doing this is beyond like I can't even wrap my mind around that. You didn't just You're the hands and feet girl

that Jesus right there. That's hands and feet. It is well it's not just like recovering. I use that term loosely because I don't think it's probably the right one, but it's not processing what happened. And then moving on with your life, it's actually like, oh, my gosh, what you gave back through what you suffered. That's phenomenal. It hurts me, though to think, like you said, I don't, because I wouldn't dare want to say it happened for a

reason, either. Because reconciling loss like that, to me, minimizes the tragedy and or minimizes what was lost. So I struggle with that reconciliation, too. But on the flip side, how powerful for you to use this tool that allowed you to move forward in a powerful way.

There's a lot of people out there that say that happened to them, they would be angry for the rest of their life stuff, the fact that you went and sought treatment, and then you went to the pool, like, I'm not sure if I would have ever been around a pole again, and I'm just being real with you like just that. That's the power of that Shenzi? Are you had to choose it, you had to get on your shoes and go get MDR you had to get on your shoes in a bathing suit? Isn't that

everything they'll go do? And that's what you're saying? And I love that it's um, so you walk the walk

baby? Well, what I do believe is that we have to take control of choosing our life path. One thing I do say is that every choice is a choice, like, we're choosing to do something or we're choosing not to do something, but both our choice, and those will probably be hard. Yeah. And one thing I did feel strongly about was that I had to move forward. And having other small kids helped me a lot, you know, yeah. And the joy that they can bring and distraction on top of it.

Yeah. And I knew that I wanted their childhood memories to be more than that loss. So I was very committed to, you know, not living and my daughter's name was Sarah, but not feeling like their childhood was in her grief and her shadow. Yeah. Well, thank you so much. This has been amazing. And I can't wait so we can talk to you again. Yeah, I would like to get a list of resources from you. And we'll post it on our

website. Because I want to make sure we got all the right resources that we can give people can find how Yeah, they're just need. Yeah, don't know where to start. I was so happy when you were sharing started to share that story. Because you have so many amazing personal stories that you've been through that I know just those in and of itself will help so many people. So thank you for sharing that. Come on. Aaron. What am i You're like our Guru therapist guru.

She's the guru and it's not contributor, but you're like are at that it starts with an R in my head. Rabbi, yes. Rabbi, that's what we're gonna call her now. Your rabbi, will Allah. Yeah, we'll get you certified online. It's awesome. We love you. Is there anything they want us so much? Leave off with or say with anyone for this episode? No, I think that my heart just says, you know, choose your path and do something towards it. Yeah, that's right. Action. We're gonna help them do it.

Thank you so much. Everything, for me to here was so interesting and exciting. But I will tell you, your own personal story is it's gonna make me cry. It is not lost on me. The change that you were able to walk in, like to, to move through that. That's the key right there. Like yeah, it's, it's there's a problem identifying it and doing it, but having the ability to go from the darkest space and change actually, actually, truly, truly change and then be better for it on the other side.

That's gold. Are you Moses, or are you Sarah? Well, I was gonna say, Sarah, way is Sarah, who's Abraham and then check out isn't it? Yes, but I was thinking Moses his wife name. Well, thank you. We were gonna want to circle back if you're gonna want to circle back would be my privilege. I have an awesome day. Love you, Aaron, you guys. You're amazing.

Thank you for listening to chatterbox radio, unraveling the untold if you have a great story that you want to share to inspire courage or just reach out, please do email us at podcast at the chatterbox radio.com Until then, imagine breathing and all the love all the joy that you can possibly imagine building yourself up and go be a blessing to the people around you because they need you