007 The Thorned Grove Assault-Remastered

Music.

Welcome to Chaos Critters, a CritHippo podcast. We're currently working on two D&D podcasts with goals to expand into other genres. You can connect with us through multiple means, crithippo.com, C-R-I-T-H-I-P-P-O.com, or through our email, nat20hippo at gmail.com. If you go to our website or search for us through CritHippo or Nat20Hippo on any of the main social media websites, you'll be able to connect with us.

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Episode 7. He started rolling dice, and I panicked. We pick up with the Critters continuing to fight a resistance they ran across, made up of Fae. The plan was to search the home of their previous captors, but I guess they'll have to deal with this first. I think it's the star that's, like, dropping thunders into the bridge. Someone catch Shatter. Where's the Moonbeam? Becca catch Shatter. Becca catch Shatter. Where's my Moonbeam?

That's right. Your Moonbeam catched it through the center of the bed, but it was based on where I'm standing. Right. Yeah. I thought he was in it. No. I killed him. They wouldn't be in it. Never mind. Yeah, catch Shatter. I went off to the edge of it. He killed the thing that was in it. I did not go in. I'm going to bring some back. Move my thunder. Can you be a little funny? Are you waiting there? Yeah. What? What are we doing today?

They did blow them back. It was pretty bad. I stretched that one. I called it. I was going to stretch. Okay. What do they call it? I don't know. That's ludicrous that's a ludicrous lyric yeah but even the mayor all of you to assume that i listen to will be okay.

You can make you can make a couple of assumptions about my life are we going to book no it doesn't mean a lovely get started and i'll ride that moment Okay, this one's going to back up five feet. What were they again? Red cap. Okay. And then it's going to run ten feet and jump. And this one's going to run ten feet and jump. This one's going to run ten feet and jump. And one is actually right there. It's going to make a dexterity saving throw, which is the house.

And it's going to fall into the water. These two are going to chop at you. Do I have three keepers left, or do I use drop the points? What did you say? 14 and 17. No, 14 and 23. Uh, 23 hits. What about 14? No? I'm sure. So one of them hits you. Wait. I still don't have my pair of your feet. Oh, no. Look for it. Hey, since when did Becca turn into a set of lions? Oh, no, no. But she had feet the other day. Nah, she doesn't even have a head. She's a ditto. In fact, when she moved to me.

Wait. So, I don't think it can roll less than that. So, it rolls six plus four, eight, or ten. You can't groom Harvest yourself. All right, I'm knocked over and unconscious and bleeding out. And my vials still stay in my pouch. But one vial opens up. And somehow, it's not a big deal. You have to be a contemporary in there. Don't waste it. I have to be a contemporary in there. Don't waste a vial. Use it later. I have to find vials. Okay, that was that's turn.

Susan's turn. She does nothing. And you don't know why. Champion. I'm still bummed out. I would love a hot sec. Hey, champion. My son Bob goes down. Yeah, I was going to say, what kind of room make it?

How far would you say item from the two Inictimals. You can get to one with 50 feet. I will run 25 feet and then use my blink to teleport the rest of the way. That's what I assumed you would do. And I am going to I think cancer doesn't really work for me. Right? That's how you do it. I think I'm going to cast one of my sorcery points and twin spell my shocking rest, and bite them both. Electricity. So you can't reach one on the other side of them.

And you could barely reach Squirtle. I can't use this in Spell of the Queen. No. Okay, then I will just use Shock and Grasp.

I'm going to use that. I'm going to use that. I'm going to use that before I post it. I am going to actually cast Chaos Bolt as a second level and Quinn Spell that. Okay. So do you want to back up a little bit? Sorry, I'll do that. Yeah. Or we'll just put you on the side of the tent next to your best friend. I mean, I don't have these, like, spanked. I'm going to use the blank still.

Yeah. So, basically, that five feet was going to be five feet to the left, putting you between the two, but not close enough to touch them. But they're hanging around. I'm going to have two rolls. I'm going to use time to chaos on the first one. Thank God I didn't. 18 plus six. That hits. Second one. 18 plus 6. 10 to hit. Go ahead. Of course you can. Yeah, you can probably throw me now. Why don't you do it for me? Back when you had just an 8. Just an 8? Take it back.

That's an 8. No. 8 out of 6. I'm helping you. No. Come on, Kat. I rolled a 2 up to you. Do you do a bunch of damage? Do they have anything? Yeah. Nope. 10 plus 10. That's 20 damage for the first guy and he's dead. In the 11th, 17th, and I'm going to do it on the 2nd night. In the evening. Yeah! Well, I can't live to see that. That's one in the morning. Can I ride? There's one in the water. There you go. Can we sell it? What kind of damage was it? And do you want to kind of hide?

I don't really know how it works. I rolled two D8s. Okay, okay. So I see how it works. So the first one was poison. I sort of bite into him and throw out those. And just like poison seeps up his arm. And the other one was lightning. It's the same thing. It's a blade. It shoots up his vein and pops out of his eyes. You got a little. You got a little. A berry. And did you re-roll for your click? Oh, sorry. How long is it going to be until we can do 188 feet? 188 feet. Oh. I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm mad because I fell for it. He would have to run like 60 feet and then dash to 140 and then he would blink, I don't think a blink's going to get that far. Yeah, I'll give them a 42-foot blink and a 64-foot run speed. So are both of those ones there dead? Yes. The only living one is down in the water, which is about like a five-foot drop to the water, and it is in the water. So you're saying that my reach tablet, I can grab that?

The others would struggle to get it, but you'll reach it. I'm going to walk up to you and you'll feed the crap out of it. Mike, is that John? Not yet. Can it swim? There it is. There it is. It can't swim. It's dead. Wait. I've got to grapple it and pull down the water until it's down. You can. We'll sure do that. If I was another level higher, I'd get it. I might not. I'm going to do Emily. No. I'm going to do Habaki.

The water's, like, five foot deep. and this thing is not very tall and is wearing iron boots. Going down, down. So it is going to make me. Let's see. We're going to say a dex check to see if it can get the boots off. It's a disadvantage. That's an 18 to 19 plus one. It hits the boots off. So it's bobbing there. Yeah, I'm going to try I'm trying to grapple it and hold it down. I like to grab things. She's got me. Oh. It's going to be... It's not a strength check, right? It's just a...

Yours is a strength. It can choose strength. So it's not a strength saving throw. It's just a strength check. It's acrobatics. No, it's half-pipe. Cool. 18? 21. Dexy. Dexy boy. I'm going to backhand it with my martial arts. Okay cheer up so it's just chilling out in the water there chilling strong water it's just panicking a little, There's a Hellcat trying to draw on it, so like... I'm going to say, well, it looks like you got yourself into some hot water there. It's going to be a fireball.

Okay. And you're at 19 hits. 19 hits? No, I'm done. I've got like three blocks coming. Oh, good. One. One? Yeah. One damage or one? Day one. Yeah, well done. Okay. Timmy's base. I'm gonna try and get up. Can I summon my strength? You can make your death the same as your own. Did the druid have it to go? Not yet. You wanna add anything? No, it's just a straight V20 roll. Oh, I got this. You got this little orange thing, and this little sunny delight.

You know what it's paying for? And guess what? I'm going back to the good old days. Race! 20! No, I'm so sorry. That is a real good one. I don't think it's knock. Knock? No, no, I don't think so. Which one says 20? Is it the orange? What? Clear one? Yeah. Then I'm going to give it to her. Yes! You stand up with one hit point. You do what I do. I have 30 there. 20 on that thing? So now you have one hit point. It's your turn.

What are you going to do? Oh, no, I'm going to go into my immediate memory, and I'm going to drink that milk. I'm going to drink that milk. No, I'm drinking it. What's that mean? What is the violence? You have all of health, and all of your spell slots have returned to you. Cool. Taking it. And basically every benefit of a long wrap. Fantastic. Dang. Is it true? That's your action. Nothing. Do you have a bonus action? No. Then it's in the pack.

Honey, that's from kids. Can I see the guy that fell in the water? Not anywhere near him. You could jump into the water near you and probably see him fall. Would I have known that he was in the water? You would know he fell. Okay, then I'm just going to direct my landing where I think he fell. Okay, roll a d20. I'm going to make the save. Roll a d4. No. One is north, two is south, two is south. Well, now we know what happens to Susie Clareman. Susie Clareman.

You gotta go, you gotta go. That's just how important it was. Does it actually hurt? It would hurt, a friendly creature, yes. If this goes from here to here and here to here, we'd be past Susan. Oh, we don't want to go. We don't want to go. Also, Susan doesn't teleport. Doesn't teleport or doesn't swipe? Susan's in a tent, so it actually can't touch her because it's not a house pod. Then I'm going to use my 30 movement speed to run towards the tent. Hey guys, what's up?

Trying to beat this thing. There's a dude in a puddle. Trying to drown this dude in the water. Not going very well. We should probably, like, interrogate it, but okay. No one cares. Waterboard? I heard waterboard. We tried talking to them, didn't we? I heard waterboard. Yeah, but he kept getting flipped off. So, does it involve drowning him?

I'll do it. So, the red cap is going to try and climb out. This is going to be a decent test. We're going to say, like, 15, you know? End of the world with 25. Yeah, I can do it. Phew. Get out. It has a plus six athletic, so I rolled a 19. Not my plan, or it won't work. Way to go. What, are you eating it in the water, or I'll put it back in the water? Well, I don't... Can I have advantage?

Why what what it's so far to look too good and it says you you dirty beast whoa i am a monstrosity that's a smirk 13 23 and 17 i have so what's the disadvantage of all this oh so the first one 8 plus is 14. So 14. That beats it. So the rest of it also hits. Yeah. 4 hits. First hits 11. Are you guys? Yeah. I'm going to have to pass out y'all. Second hits 9. Okay. Third hit is 10. 11, 9, and 7? Yep. What?

Well, okay, I rolled a 1 and a 2 on that one. I know. You were going to say when the first one was 11, I'm like, we're not going to make it, folks. That's his terror. It is natural. Susan, sir. She again does nothing. Champion. She's caught in a tent. She's okay. Is he right on the bank of this? Presumably. Well, it's not really a bank. It was just caught in a mosquito net. You know on Super Smash Bros. The Donkey Tongue? How it's like up the Donkey Tongue?

The Donkey Tongue? The Donkey Tongue. It's basically like five feet off the water. Think of like a river or a village on the water.

Or on a bayou. Think of a village on a bayou. Like 50 feet off the water. That would ruin it. I'm gonna kiss. I'm assuming I can see a rock on the ground. That was a rock or a stone. If you look, let's say, well, I mean, there's a lot of rubble over here from when she's underway. Okay, I'm going to stare at that rock with my red cap. Okay. And that's a save? Second level. Yeah, it's 30 points. Ooh, 30 points. Listen, this guy is random. Who are you? The musician?

Pew. He's a little old guy. It takes, I'm saying it takes a... Probably yours. That's not yours. Hard to answer? Nothing. Okay. Yeah. I'll extract it. It's a bit distant, right? No, I'll... It doesn't read that. And it doesn't say, It says on a failed save, the object hits the target's top, and it says when the object hits the target, it takes that. Right, on a failed save, it hits the target. Right, so when you strike something, it's just going to keep going.

Yeah, it'll hit the tent. It'll hit the dodge on the failed. It'll hit the tent. So that rock went flying past, and then 3d8 to the tent. Oh, with a ricochet? No, well, like a dodge. Well, like a missed bullet doesn't just stop in the air. Right. Okay, well, nothing happens. I mean, you've cut that tunnel a little bit. There was already a hole on the side of the tunnel. Yeah, but now there's a hole on this side of the tunnel. There was a hole in there, because that's where I busted out of.

Yeah, I was investigating, and then I heard a fight, and it hung straight out the side. It is now... That was my Barry's turn. Barry's zero investigation. Barry? I don't have any... I have no healing anything. I'm just going to beat it. I'm not even going to... I'm not going to turn around.

I'm just going to beat it. Ten. Missed. Cool. I'm going to burn a key point and get it two more times. I'm going to... I'm going to buy it two more times. I was going to be at 19 and 14. Ten. All right. And now the book's going to be... B4. B4. Plus. All right. It's going to be... No. 12. Nope. Yes. 12. 3, 3, 3, 3, 12. Okay. It's not looking good. And then I have one of those days. It is now Kira's turn. Kira, I am looking very badly. Okay, kill it.

All right, then just go. Where's she going? I don't know what the... She turned blue last time. I don't know what the frick she can do. Oh, yeah, I've been casting, though. Yeah, I just... Yeah, um, so... I'm just weak. Can I look at the dead ones? Yeah. I'll see if you already... They're fire.

Yeah, that's the actual red hint. so put that down where, what'd you say okay pen does not hit and, the cantrip no no no he's rolling Mike's rolling for you on the wild magic table and Frank is protesting Frank is not mad that you did a cantrip, you are not the problematic person here so 20 gems I'm so loud I am so loud. Let me jam a shoot from the caster's fingertips. Each jam is worth... 20 gold. So bat fingertips. It's like shooting gems horizontally as you fly.

And she's pointing her feet towards the thing and all of a sudden 20 gems worth 20 gold a piece shoot out of her feet. The fingertips. Like that have the little, that have the little gravity. Yeah, but she can't, now she's casting her front of her hand while she's flying. Oh, maybe. Up in the air. Rob, I'm going to smash the bed. I'm not going to get whatever you just threw. What? 20 gems for a 20 gold apiece. Four of your gold pieces worth of gems.

That's what Adam was getting. That's crap, right?

Nah, see. I don't know what just happened. Or just have a side situation and just get nice gravy. And that's if you can recover, though. Great. Are they magic healing, Jeff? You can try one. Oh. You can't see my face, Becca, but it was a good one. Only about 5% land on the thing, since she was casting on that. The other 95% drop into the water. So one gem lands on it. Yep. Okay. I rolled a max. I rolled a V20. Not thinking that there were 20 gems.

And it was a natural 1. So we have a 1 gem. Translates quite easily. Can we say that the gem landed in Bob's pouch What's in that two-meter embrace? That's losing all. All right. Bob. Yes? Bob. Yes? Your turn.

Magic missile. Wait, hold on. Before I do that. Are we interrogating or just killing? Murder. All right. Leave it. You have the intelligence here, fam. What? No. That is true. All right. So, Janice, you want to tell me how this happens? Oh, of course. Because there's no way a magical temple can't hang. I know. I know. All right. Let's play it again. Pikachu? Yeah. The cutest thing. Oh, I'm on episode... I'm starting episode 17 of the episode. My favorite character is... On 11 points of damage.

All right. Davenport. Davenport. Davenport. Davenport. Davenport. Davenport. Davenport. Oh, damn it. Missile comes out the back. Missile comes from the belt. Okay. And then the message comes out of nowhere. Explodes his head. Explodes the crotch. And explodes the chest. On the left, it is deep, smoldering. So you basically buy for Casey, then, with Miss. Absolutely. And I say that, and then that's pretty much it.

Actually, then I say, hey, I'm going to try and go into that little puddle and try to get those arms loose because I'm accessorizing. Hey, honey? Yeah? Where are you? Well, it's good. So you guys see... Hold on, hold on. You guys see your kangaroo just split the two in half and immediately jump in the water. Okay, bye! Roll an investigation to see what you find, Emma. Because you reach 19.

You find the booze. Yeah. And you find all 19 of the other gems. Yay! And my mucus memory will go. But it's quite heavy, so you might want to do something about it. My lovely lady. Do you have any other minutes? Do you have any other minutes? I'm going to go tell the court. You guys want some gems? You can may as well have the one gem that you can see. You can't may as well have the gems underwater that you definitely can't see. But they're on my couch now. Okay.

Okay, well, that's what you also do. Music fills the air. Really? What's up? You know that picture song? No, you know that song, the Six Flags song? And it just is on repeat. Six Flags. What's that? What's that? 19 Jones. That's the worst, I'm going to drop my feet You guys want to try and eat these things?

Bob's having trouble getting out of the water She's definitely at the bottom of the water I think she's hopping That was a loud whistle I can't even whistle, She's hopping And she's moving at half feet I put some tentacles down for you to grab and pull up I'll give you a hand. It's real bloody. Roll strength check. Because there is no dex when you're just straight up lifting it. Well, that's real bad. Roll a dexterity save to see if you fall in. A dex save?

23? Okay. You basically go Spider-Man on the subway train and you stop yourself from falling in. Yay. And your friends kind of catch you like, Honestly, with a six strength instead of a 23, I'm picturing that I'm too slippery. I have two hit points, so I'm probably still bleeding a lot. Okay. So... Sorry.

Three. You look super... Do you want this vial, or no? I dropped it. I'm going to take the card. No, I'm kidding. I'm going to flip my head as well. Yeah. Yeah, she's that vile. Yeah, they came in with that good stuff. All right, I follow them. There is an eagle flying around. Actually. Walking. Oh, frick. You don't want much. Oh, frick. Did Susan get, Susan got frickin' on the guys? I think Susan is fine. But who the hell is that? What?

Was I trying to get her high? I just made a moonbeam. Did anybody look at you? What about you, champion? Do you think this is your magic? Yours seems to go haywire like mine. Yeah, I haven't really felt... You know how you get that weird tingle when it goes bad with your magic? Yeah. Yeah, I didn't really feel that in the last couple times. I don't know if that was something I did or something somebody forgot. I didn't really feel it, Eric. I don't think that's the reason why she's gone.

What happened to that? I'll be honest. We don't know Susan very well. She might just be... Janice, you're still drowning. He just goes. Can I just look another check to check? Your uncle and daughter were holding heavy metal. I tried. I am terrible. Oh. I'm going to cast Moldavere like that she's a mime. Yeah. And then just like move her up to the. Okay. I'll allow that. Let me move. Yeah. Sorry. I'm a little slippery right now. Are we like taking a nap?

I'm not going to drink this if we're taking a nap. It's all right. Yeah. Can we take a nap for a minute? Go ahead. Susan and I figure out what the hell we're doing, because I'm the one holding the damn gems, and there's no reason for it, so I'm just going to... I'm just going to take it. It's good. It's good, y'all. Oh, yeah. I'm back. I ended up back there. Bye. Susan, the eagle, the tent, and fly off. Okay, bye. Hey, America doesn't run. Oh, well.

Okay, Susan. I, I'm, I, I just... Don't look at me like that. So, I'm going to be good. Alright, bye, Susan. So, who's going to tell the lizard? What? At the end of the time. I'm still trying to make this look good, Joe. I've been trying to make it for a while. I don't think I'm going to do a scene like it. I don't think people agree. It's fine. I'll take first line. We're taking a nap, right? No, no, I just slammed that. We're going to do it after the nap. Sure. Okay, cool.

Freaking wire, let's go. These gems are pointless, right? I mean, maybe it'll make it sense. Okay, so I'm going to drop... I mean, they're not, like, heavy to keep them. Well, it's heavy in the high end. You think so? Or we could leave them, like, trails and, like, make some money. Ooh, ooh, yeah. Water and sand. Are we staying in this area, though? Because to leave a Hansel and Gretel situation... They're not heavy. We can use them later.

All right, I thought... You can keep the gems. All right, you know what I mean? They're really small gems. The heavy thing is your iron boot. That's why you couldn't get out of the water. It wasn't the gems. I don't have any boots. I don't have any boots. I don't have boots. Tangerine's big ass boots don't fit in these boots. I don't want to wear them. That iron goes in the shoes. You have all your ice clubs and your dashboards have to go up.

Open your other eye. It's not going to fit. Basically, either Champion or Barry could fit them on two of them.

Literally don't I would need a third you know we're dead redcaps I'm not sure you'd be trained out there alright I'm taking a look at those you're gonna have all six. I put on all six boots just because I can alright well nevermind I don't care so you think, that you ran really fast with these boots Let's say, something I've done before, go on, if you move up to your speed,

creature you can see and kick it with its iron boot. The target must make a 60 on a DC 14 deck saving throw or take 3d10 plus 4 bludgeoning damage and be knocked from. Does that multiply if I'm wearing six boots? No, no, no. You're wearing my boots. You're wearing my boots. No, they don't make you go faster. I keep going at full speed and you end up and front up someone and you You kick them. Basically, you fully run, drop kick. You will knock them for all.

Oh, like a famous donkey. And hit them hard. I'm sorry. Remind me, remind me how much. The Iron Pursuit. Yeah, I'm going to say something. You know the point. So, there you go, guys. Whoosh. Not a bad one. Three hair. You're good people. All right. Charlie Murphy boots. catch don't look at that but that Rick James Rick James when he kicked him out of that pain window however have eternal bleeding. So, can I armor strike people by taking them with a boop again?

Can I take the boop with an armor strike? Oh, it's a D5. Yeah. Armor strike. Even though it doesn't use the tentacle damage? Yeah. I'm going to put the boop down. The boop should be a different attack. Okay, got it. They would take your attack. At least someday it should go against. If you have them, you have to take the charge.

Pretty much. You have to. so please I'm gonna do this I'm gonna do it what are you doing.

She won't do that until level 8 now we're gonna level back up quick I thought you were already level 4 yeah yeah so level 5 would be the next level, level 3 level 4 are you good what alright cool I just got a bunch of boots hey back I mean uh that other gem that fell on the land can I just hold that in my mucus memory yeah You know what? Just let me hand it. Alright, so let me just put those things in my pouch. You may have handed one gem. No, I've been only, uh... Because the kangaroo

had already pouched them down in the water. Okay. Alright. Alright. My turn. I toss it. Drop it. Drop it. I toss it. I toss it. Man, I can't believe it. You can do your... What do you guys want to do from here? What do you think we should do? Should we look at other... Go to the other island? So this... Was there... There was a bridge out before. Can we, like, see anybody else? Is there anybody else around here? I don't figure out this place. Remember that time you committed genocide on

this island? Yeah. You don't feel much the same, but not as guilty. You don't feel like you've committed genocide. If anything, regional genocide. Yeah, we still have it. Specify it. Remember watching? Mr. Allman said we had to do this. I'm going to go over to the other island. Okay, I'm going to chop that one. I'm going to jump I'm going over there yeah I want to go over there, Are you sure? I see everybody going that way. I turn around and come back.

All right. Up there we go. Which is what? How far? Like strength? Yeah. What is your full strength? Strength? 17, 15, 14. So you can jump 17 feet. I'm going to prompt back this way. Wait, no. I'm going to... If they're going mid-barrier, you'll take up. Okay. All right. I was going to go over that other bridge. We've already been in that tent. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Oh, you were mourning your... You were. You were staring at that dead tree for a while. Uh, what are you bailing, Kara?

All right. Kara. I looked through it. What is that one? Okay. I can't mark my name for one. Yeah. I've been doing this for a long time. I didn't see anything in it. It's two over there and two over here. I think I'm going across the small island to the close to it already. Okay. What do you do? These are kind of two yet, right? Or huts? Yeah. One's like blown over. Yeah. I want to check the other two that are standing then. I mean, if there's any signs of what was going on there.

I'll let you choose one, because you also got to let your other friends do things, too. I'll let you talk about that one. Okay. I want to dig through the broken sense. Wow. Broken sense. The other one. Okay. Investigate. That from... It's all in minus two. That's why there's nothing like that. Yeah. Oh, I know you. But there actually is one. Oh, 20. Yeah, probably. I probably as an attorney, I'm like, that's a lot of people here. Okay. Leela, you want to go now for 20?

It is done. Point I'll note is before Susan flew away, she dropped her bow and the gnarled stick. I meant to ask about that when we dived in and saw her flying around. I don't know. That was the thing. She was pointing at boxes and they were just doing weird stuff. You find a ring. It's shiny. I'm going to cast a Technagic as a ritual. Okay. Okay. What did you roll? 30-20. 30-20? 30-B. Okay. You find a pair of furry boots. They seem to stretch. Okay.

No, no, I took them back somewhere. What's wrong with you? Three. You find nothing. Well done. That's right. Okay, and what are you two doing? I'm going to check out this tent. Okay. Barry told me there was nothing in here, and then we walked in, and there were a bunch of boxes. A lot of boxes. I don't trust the police. I'm going to look around. No, shouldn't you? Okay. We're all in an investigation. Can I, like, help him investigate instead of rolling my own check? Sure.

I'm going to help you investigate instead of rolling my own check. I'm rolling. What am I going to do? Eight to ten. I got a ten. A ten? You've noticed. You finally, from the front, you finally get a good look at this ground. It is made of gnarled wood. His favorite word for the day is gnarled. Oh, I'm sorry. All right. A wooded throne or a twisted and gnarled wood sits in the middle of the tent across from the opening. Chests and barrels sit on either side of the room, crowded into the corner.

A table sits in the middle of the room between the entrance and the throne, where the... That's that? That big one? Yep. And there were... So you already know there was an evil voice on the other side. Because it came out the back. Oh, thank you. Do you notice a carpet under this table? No. It, uh... I think you did not. I mean, that's just the last thing I'm gonna say. I have a tan intelligence. Craig, can you, um, move the table up the carpet, please? Yeah,

give it a shove. I'm going to grab the carpet with my teeth. It looks kind of intense pulling again. We need to be fighting, fellas. Not both. I will grab... I will also grab the carpet. I'm into it. You grab the other side of the carpet, and all of a sudden, the parts in your mouth are not the only parts off the ground, and it is pulling away from you, but the entire rug is in the air now. Is it flying? Are we rolling into the ringer?

No. I let go of my corner of the carpet. I didn't mean you to try to jump on it. Roll. Oh, I don't know. Deck? Yeah. Surfboard? Hmm. I don't know if it's a roll. I don't know. Well, you can't. I did. What'd you roll? Total of four. Ooh, okay. As you go to jump on it, it does a barrel roll and moves out of your way. A barrel roll. And then I laid back down on the ground. Like where it was? Well, underneath where it is now. Was there anything on the ground? No. I go and stand on it in my mind.

It lifts up and rolls everything in a bucket. That one wasn't mine. You ride it. You wrap your tentacles around it and have all six of your feet I got those iron boots probably helping. Yeah. And you think you're less of a jerk to this thing. You might be able to ride it. Do you feel like it's a whole new world? Ma'am. Ma'am. I would be a woman. Wow. All right. Do I really, with an intelligence of six, feel like I should be nicer to this thing?

Oh, no. Is that an insight thing? Because I do have insight. That's a thing I have. I try and... I brush some of those couples off. Well, it wouldn't be an intelligence. It would be probably a dexterity. Not a dexterity. I'm sorry. Wisdom. Insight? Wisdom. I have proficiency in insight. That's my question. Wisdom would probably be better than your insight. I have proficiency in insight. Fine. With your insight, you can probably recognize Iron Man.

Now that it's back up. Well, it will. Okay. Y'all ever seen the movie of the man who doesn't want to take his ass? It's riding. What I believe everyone can understand is a magic carpet. I'm trying to be nice to it. I like trying to brush some of the scum words out of it. Like, I've got the spikes on the inside and I use it to serve a comb. The comb and the fringe plot. I start making biscuits! I kick out of two of the boots I can use.

Well the carpet is like five foot by seven foot and it can carry six hundred pounds it has a fly speed of forty four nothing wait. They're going I mean she is pretty much quelled it right now how do I drive the road, well typically for a magic item you would need a magic word but if you want to strong arm it I really give you the chance go go webs every once in a while You will have to make a check to make sure you maintain it. That's if we can't figure out what the magic word is. Yeah. Oh,

shit. I don't want this situation. Is it go? If I say go. Came that way. Here we go. I say fly. Do we have any trees walking in common? Yes. I don't you can't hear language you have to move on right I only keep coming they said this yeah you also this rug was below the table that was always here you just did not ever come over here oh and we got one before yeah, I kind of try to urge the rug towards the exit make a persuasion nope never mind done What's that? Nat 1.

You can still make one if you hit a Nat 1. I'm not having 19. I think we should try to guess. What was Goblin? I think it was Goblin. 10. Okay. Goblin's favorite thing. Oh, the creator? So what are you three that were in the tent doing? I think Kira still had the Explorer. I did, but I was in three. So there was nothing there. All right. So you detect that the magic, the thing that you're holding, is abjuration magic, I believe? I don't know. Oh, what's that? Duration magic. Shielding? Yeah.

Add duration magic. Can I fit it on my box? It will. You know, it'll resize to whatever. Okay. Okay. And then I just admire it. You recognize that her? I don't know. Magic? Magic? Yes. Your of? Have. Ooh, I know. I know how to tell. I don't know what the spell is. I literally read it out loud. I don't know what it is. Don't mock the DM. He's got a new part, but he's going to try it for us. Transmutation. Transmutation. You recognize Transmutation. Be careful. Why?

It's our Transmutation. I'm so smart that I don't know what that means.

You're a wizard. You know what that means. It modifies me. Okay. Basically, the safety is 90% of all of me. You remember how long? I'm a guy in the Transfiguration class. So what are you doing? I'm hiring a hiring. Okay. Okay. On the other island. Oh, yeah. I go to, um, I go to Honey's 10th. I say, yo, what'd you find? I, I, we go to my What are you doing? Well done. I go to Kira's 10th. I say, hey, what'd you find? Nothing. What'd you guys find? Well, you need some help looking?

I mean, you can take a look, but I'm pretty sure that's not that bad. Yeah, so investigate. Rage! Hmm, Jax is 14. Well, that doesn't look good. She was bad at looking, but she was all good. All right, okay. I spot my little light. There's nothing in here. I hear it. Yeah. Well, you're a vet. Hi. I'm Matt. Anyhow, you go there. So I go towards that little ring. Over here? Yeah, that one. Okay, you see the wood. Yeah. Can I come back? Let's say, let's go join Barry and whatnot. Okay, yeah.

As they're doing that, before they go over, I would like to try to see if it's carpet. For the, the bus, the fleet ferry, the private carpet, try to do a... Do a persuasion check. Wait, the fleet ferry, the chaperone? Yeah, the persuasion of the carpet to do what you want. Is my check that is correct? Yeah, but you're not quite there. I mean, I just said it before, you guys. Oh. There you go. Do you persuade it? Do you float them out and meet them? And where do you go

with it? I was going to go over and pick up the puppet. Susan Lee Ruvus. You're on. Okay. So you see them come out of the tent on a flying carpet and enter the other tent. Now, it squeezed, it tacos you through the door. Very, very heavy. You go in through the door. You're going through the door and you see on the ground the bow that you knew Susan always carried and that stick she was using wildly. I won't reach it. Okay.

I assume by that point you start to arrive. You recognize the stick has transmutation magic and the bow is there. But you also recognize the carpet. I don't know what kind of magic. I thought it was going to be me a ride with someone that I was following and he was like, it doesn't seem to want to move. I was like, oh. I know that. I think it might also be transmutation. I googled fly, which is also transmutation. There's a lot of transmutation on the island. What were they possibly doing?

I don't know. There's a whole lot of magic in general. How far is the tech magic? 38. Okay, so that's all you. Uh-huh. We should check the other path that way. What about that burn? Did we look at that? No, we were fighting then. Okay. So, as you are going this way, you get to about here. And by holy sh- There's a blinding light of magic coming through. I look to my left. You see the opening into the tent, right?

So you see the wooden throne, and you see the table, and you see the blinding light coming from there. I wandered in and tried to figure it out. Okay. You see it coming from... Bully check that time. You see it coming from the throne. I looked real hard. I looked real hard. I looked real hard. Okay. Very much so. You, like, seemed to, like, emanate from... Honey, are you good? I investigate the throne. Okay. Probe investigation. I hear Bob yelling at Honey and I jump off the carpet.

Yeah, I get what's happening. Is there going to be a magical time bomb? They're not pointing, though. Yeah, only you can do it. You see. We work together. There's a mechanism to help teams on the throne. That if you were to sit on the throne in like a pushback, like you were in like some kind of reclining device, like a recliner. A lazy one. Pretty much. Okay. Basically, if you recline on this chair, a little compartment pops out back.

I sit in the chair, and I recline. And the light suddenly gets brighter. It might stand back up as it closes the compartment. I sit back up. The light. I recline. It breaks. Someone come in here! I'm waiting. I'm wandering. Okay, you wander in, and you see this drawer kind of sticking out the back of the throne as she reclines. and when she sits back up, it goes back into the chair. When she replies again, it comes back out. Can I take a look in the drawer while she's back? Let me take a look.

Let me see what's in here. There's a book. There's a book in the drawer. It's a book! Black book. Very immediately. I pick it up in my mouth. You're a tiny bat right now. You're not an actual giant bat yet. I don't think you're going to pick up much of anything. Someone bigger coming here. Barry goes back over, takes the book out, puts it down, and walks away again. Oh, you're a mage hand? Okay, don't worry about mine. What is it? What is it? I can't get the color off. I can't get the color off.

Is that your dog? So, suddenly, as she casts mage hand, she smells like a stump. Barry was already leaving, but Barry's leaving faster now. Well, I'm doing circles on the magic card. Ew! Honey kind of, like, looks up to see if she can see a stripe down the back. There is no stripe, but there is a stain. I think it's that back. Okay. I take the vote for Mage Hand. Okay. Okay. Do you still have Mage Hand out, Becca? Uh, no, I'm done. Okay, the smell disappears.

Oh, thank goodness. When Mage Hand disappears, the smell disappears. I kind of, like, shake my leg a little bit, like, what kind of magic is this? On the book, it's an everyday wizard. Like, if each type of magic was a different color, this would be Whiteside. Well, I have a feeling you should take this back to our druid friend.

You can take it back to your wizard friend. I mean, if we found it, maybe they know. Wait, you touched the book? Yeah, I have the book. I feel a tingling in your tummy. I need a good berry. No, she doesn't want to eat a good berry. What? I need a good berry. You feel full. Do I still feel tingly? A little bit. I need a moonbeam. Music. Yeah, it's possible. So you feel a tingle on your tongue. Really weird in here.

It's flying around thick. Yeah, the champion's riding it. I put the book on the rug. I have a go. Do you feel a tingle? I don't know if you put the book on the rug. It's a champion. It's a moving target. I set the book down. It's fast and furious. It's quiet, but I'm shaking my head. Yeah, it feels a little punchy. All right, I take the book back up. Okay. Let's go. You don't have a book. Do we have a book? Why don't I just stop?

Yeah, you just have to read your chosen one. Hide it. You want to go back to the douchebag? Maybe that. Was there anything off that other brand that way? I, uh, grow plants out of your mouth. I maintain eye contact with you. What do you think the carpet plot fee was? Do you remember? We didn't have a carpet plot fee. I didn't say it. Oh, you did. I just have no sense. Not like that. Carpet plot fee is $43. Yeah, pretty much. I don't think so. I want to put branches over this pit.

Somebody put a pit under these pitches. We'll head it out, Danny. We'll head it out. Where are we going to, Yus? Back to the... The grove. Remind me, why did we come here, Yus? The spike ring. We were trying to figure out where all the... Where all the... Uh, fey stuff came from. And we found a book. Cool. And killed every... Do I get to buy it as a find? Perfect. Good carry. Wow. Good carry. Good carry. Can carry us.

Here, I think they'll know. if you've got a bear and a large because Barry I think, she's still alive Barry is still bloody oh no no I'm good I popped that potion they send a I'm a bear they send someone telling they do not you know, I have a I'm not large I look around yeah whoever they've been sending out hasn't done like honey probably only like okay. I'm sorry did we determine where that ridge off the back was I know you did it was Oh, wait, in the carpet.

Hold on, did we ever get to this? Oh, yeah. No. No, you gotta go here. Okay. All aboard. All right, let's go. I get on the carpet. I jump on. Can you carry all of them? Apparently, we just had the conversation. Oh, my bad. I can carry everyone except Kira. Yeah. Yeah. All right, let's go. She's a man. I hopped on the carpet. We apparently all the way less than the carpet. She weighs four ounces. They're not split on the carpet.

I roll backwards onto my back and just hold my bottom feet and rock forward. It's five steps. Four more. Yeah. I think you're making biscuits. Let's get out of here, gang. Rolling around. Okay. So you return to Melchior? Melchior. Did we fly over the farms? Is that over? Yeah. You could go high enough to get over. You recognize the trees don't quite go all the way out to above the thorns, but there is kind of like an opening where you can just fly right out.

Oh, yeah, he said there was, so we can just pop in. Oh. Yeah, I think we should show them the most disrespect we can to their own moneylending. Honestly? Yeah. I could do it. Wait for us to do it every time we come in. How come these guys need to get the berry, and I'm like, we're going back to the We're going back to the douchebag's house and I get a flower out of my mouth. I think you ate that.

Yeah, that's true. But, like, that was more of an act of spite than, like, anything else. Yeah, no. Okay. I arrive in the grove. From the top, then. Yeah, from the top. And as you're coming in, landing, the fairy dragons eat cloaks. Can I go over to the leading deck to see if I can get the carpet half of it? Like, bend down and do a step. Oh, yeah, do a little step thing. Sure. Not funny. It then found its steps For you And you, Willow Why, Tyler? Yeah I walk down and I nuzzle Can I nuzzle back?

I, uh, I plump off in lines with all six of my iron boots And make like a real big divot in the fourth floor I jump off the couch I roll a perception check Oh, yeah, That's what I'm doing What? No! It's not eight, baby! Ten. Ten. And Kiera? Which one we're rolling? Perception? Yeah. Is it hearing? Actually, never mind. It probably doesn't matter because I roll a three. Oh wait, don't say what I'm saying. It's hearing. I mean, it's not really hearing, but since you're hearing it's blindsight,

it would be hearing for you. Okay. Like a nine. No. That looks better. That is a, uh, 14. Okay. We'll angle what I hear. 11. I love it. I see that. I see that. And only you can see this. I'm going to text you what I do. I love getting text. Thank you. You're very, very welcome. Thank you. You're welcome. You're so majestic. Time you texted me something, I heard you laugh. That's the wild text. Like, you open your text and you're like,

well, that's a small title. What? I actually did that. Last time I got a private text. I was like, that was fun. Right? Yeah. What, Doug? I mean, you're brave. I'm going to point out how to be a group. Wow, that was really good. He did that thing on a cat. Uh, I will point out that there are a bunch of arrows sticking out of trees. I don't want to cheer. Uh, I mean, we all have pretty good guns. Does anyone else smell the blood? No.

Sounds like a bunch of panties. Uh, what does the dragon do when it unmasks and saw blood and arrows everywhere? I don't think it has noticed yet. Now that you say that, it looks around and it looks horrified. And it immediately flies to the thorned rounds against the wall. I don't follow it. Like, in fear, it's just like retreating back. Like looking for daddy. I mean, not in such an entire way, but yeah. Okay. Uh... Shh. These guys look kind of... Does it look or does it smell? Yeah. Both.

But all... Like, the arrows are in... Like, they're not the most obvious. It's not like this was a hail of arrows. These were well placed. Everyone can see one of the Hutts. These people have it going in on their inside. Yeah. I'm following... I'm following the dragons. I'm following the dragons. Yes. Yes, as you approach the hut, you can hear noises. Good noises? Bad noises? A mixture. What does this sound like? Not really good noises. Liam and I have the same.

Just give him a roar. Someone speaking in a soothing tone, and you hear some grumbling. Okay, so not like there's murder happening in there, like maybe someone's injured in there. Fine.

You still have some of that music water? Yes, sir. Somebody's hurt over in that one. Well, I'm only holding the rest of everyone else's music water. I'm mad that I already ate my own. Well, that's fine. Can I get some more water? No. I am. I am going to Lincoln Center for all of these ones. You better get stabbed, boy! Why don't you turn up, do you think? You blink and dive, and you see the palmaro, tending to the wounds of the kenku. I don't know if you ever asked the kenku.

Right, do they see me? It's like they're blinking at you. Like, they see you pop in. It's not a very big hug, but, like, they're focused on what you're doing. Well, one's focused in pain. The other's focused on tending to the wounds. Now, is that the same plot the dragon went to? No, the dragon went to Maltheer's hut. Is Maltheer's hut all sealed off? It's a little larger, but yeah, it's still sealed off. I give it a nice dash with a tentacle and I look, hello?

Who's there? Your favorite abomination? Sorry, monstrosity. Oh, we'll cut you down in total view. Mm-hmm. Oh, Colberry. How does he look? You can call him Berth. He's, like, very sweaty, very tired. You can see he's fought long and hard. He's uninjured. But, like, you're not sure how long it was, unfortunately. Either he's terrified, or it was me. So, you didn't have as much success with the murder as we did. Right. Very ear-tackle and it's one of those... Milky, what happened?

I mean, that's about it, too. I didn't try to recite that. Milky, what happened? They're in fact... Who are they? Oh, we encountered a blinky dot... What is it? A quick ear... Quigley. There it is. Grand Cap. Were they Quigley? A couple of live trees. Or Fast and Furious. Morphay. Yeah. A lot of live trees. We found a book. Oh, yeah. book. I love her forward and I hold out the book. But it was in a cool recliner. Nah, she just grabbed it though. She's a bear. I don't know why I didn't ask.

It doesn't happen. What didn't happen? I was polite to ask. What didn't happen? I had you wondering. Cookie, what didn't happen? 10 minutes ago, I made an icon and I didn't even know. No, we didn't. What? What didn't happen? Are those your emails, Anthony? It feels like five seconds ago and it feels like hours ago. How did they get in here? Do you know? Did they come from the roof like we did? Did you invite them in? Where's that from? All of a sudden, an error just started. Then they all went

there. He hit Stonechip. Yeah, man. That's the game. That's what I'm going to do. That's what I'm going to do. All right. I reached in my fanny pack and I handed him a blueberry. He said, thank you. What? Okay, what do you want us to do? You look all fucked up and... I'm not. Okay, but... I'm just... Yeah, look emotionally. I am. So if that... Which is a lot for me. That's very promotional. I open my arms for a fair hug. Where is... I hold the tentacle down.

Where's who? Azariah. I didn't gather a lot of names when we were here. So... The elf...

Is Azariah. the dragon is for Sana I am Elkir I stick my head I stick my head out to everything clear and I'm like yo anyone see the Elf around here our sprite is Palmera yeah yeah Palmera got it, and the Tengu is Tung got it yeah I think I heard some groaning over there but I'm more interested in you know what he wants to do what's the third hut anybody go to that third hut yeah, I don't like to feel So since you had offered, I hugged you. And then I just... I'm going down.

She didn't heal you. Yeah, I like you enough that I don't get the point at the end of the tentacles. I really do. Oh, very. You're funny. She's too tired. Do you want to come out of your hut so we can reconvene? I go... Was the third hut closed? Nobody went to the third hut. Kira, did you go to the third hut? No, I did not. I'm gonna go out and go over to the third hut. Is that one also all closed up? It's open. Y'all, the elf's not here. Zariah says he's gone.

Azariah. Zariah says this is what I said. Azariah. I don't know if I have my trans-whisperer. Smells like a bunch of pennies indeed. The thorny grove has been attacked and one ally is missing. Who did this and what were they after? Music.