The Christmas Episode!

I'm excited.

Yeah, what's going on?

We're about to do an episode serial Killers? Suddy?

What we're doing it?

Okay?

This this episode Christmas. No, I'm saying, welcome to Serial Killers.

This is episode sixty four. We start, Yeah, we started.

It smells like pea in here.

Oh, it smells like pee because we had mathel. Wait, this thing is so loud. I don't think anybody can hear us. I don't know how to shut it off. Oh oh I shut it off. Okay, wait, so we have to start. This is our Christmas episode?

Yeah?

So do we need to sing?

No?

We did that? All righty, let's just play this.

Serial were.

Guess when you Hannah jam cereal.

Milk is.

Okay? Now, only Danielle and I can appreciate that, because Andrew's like, what was that sound? I never even heard of that New body news with that ease.

Again, and when you start off a podcast like that, it sets us off on a really bad tone.

Thank you for letting me be a guest on this special edition.

Oh my god, to have you at the Christmas episode. I was so excited.

Really, yes, oh you.

Guys are so nice.

Yes, I'm saying, it's a holiday episode or were going fall in on Christmas?

I think Christmas because.

You're Jewish, so we doesn't want to start.

They're pretty they're pretty close this year they coincide, I believe this year.

So oh I saw it already.

What was it?

Elf on the Shelf cereal? But I didn't.

But it's not there. It's not there anymore because it is like.

The Help on the Shelf?

It disappeared.

What you're doing about there? Oh my god, I got him. I got Psycho who this guy sure moves around. He's always supposed to move around at middle of the night when it's dark. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got him. All right? So, hey, Elf on the Shelf cereal from Calloggs. It's brand new. It's the official cereal of the North Pole. Did you know that?

I didn't know that.

Yes, it's sugar cookie flavored cereal with marshmallows. Okay, so right off the bat, I'm like, my head is going to explode because I know it's gonna be five balls.

Are the marshmallows because it's from the North Pole made of whale blubber? What you know? Because it's North Pole approved, aren't there Polar Bear there?

Well?

No, I don't want to kill the polar bear. I'm saying the whale problem.

You want to kill whales. I don't understand.

I learned in your last episode that you save five bowls for marshmallows and chocolate, So this can't be five balls.

It's possible because sugar, cookies and marshmallows. So we'll see, you know, you never know.

He makes up his rules as he goes.

So it's the elusive Elf on the Shelf. And originally, when I had heard about the cereal a few months ago, it was supposed to only be released in Canada, and I was very nervous that I was going to have to drive north of the border to get a box of this cereal because I noticed on the box there it's an artificially flavored and there was a U in it, so I knew that it was some foreign crap because baseball flavored with a U.

Oh yeah.

And then I actually reached out to Elf on the Shelf himself, what are you doing.

I'm posing a video of us singing Christmas.

You're not a millennial. Get off your phone.

I'm so sorry.

So I reached out to Elf on the Shelf himself on Twitter and he responded to.

Me, which elf did you respond to?

My name is No, I don't know that at Elf on the shelf the real I follow that too. Yeah. Yeah. So I reached out to him and he told me that the cereal was coming and I asked her for a preview box and he's like, nope, So I got it myself.

Can I get it?

I ordered it. Yeah, they have it in Walmart.

But I feel like Elf on the Shelf is a recent thing that they're trying to say is classic because as a child, we never did Elf on the shelf. Who's saying it's classic, Well, I feel like elf on the shelf they try to market themselves, is like, oh, everyone used to do this tradition. Who did this tradition?

Not off on the shelf.

The tradition has been around in my house since my son was in first grade, and that is thirteen years ago. So we've been doing it in my house for thirteen years.

Oh so it's been a thing for a while. Someone's pulling on my shirt. Is it the Elf?

Is it the Elf?

What are you doing?

She is wearing a red coat like the elf.

So in my house, both both the mench on the bench and Elf on the shelf visit us and they hang out with each other.

We have a name for your elf.

No, you don't know the name of your alf on the shelf.

I have to ask Cooper. I don't know she would know.

I bet Amy knows. I'll text name, Okay, text her?

All right, So I'm gonna do the Scottie shape because there's marshmallows.

Why don't you yell at Daniel for using her phone.

Because she's texting my wife and I'm cool with that. So they're little star.

Pieces of your elf on the shelf.

Cooper's actually homesick right now. We should facetimer.

Ops.

She actually threw up in the nurse's garbage can. So you are red and green star pieces with marshmallows, and there's a whole Elf scene on the back, and come see the magic with the official cereal of the North Pole.

I'm so excited about this.

Let's check the ingredients corn flour, blend sugar. So there's a lot of sugar in here.

Yang all right, Chris miss, let's bust it open. I feel like diets just go downhill towards like the end of November.

If I told you what I ate this morning. If my breath is really bad, that's why.

Now let me tell you marshmallows everything else.

The marshmallows that are in here are the new baby marshmallows that are in the new Rice Krispy Trees formula. Ew I can tell they're the same marshmallows because it is Kellogg's.

He can tell, yeah, well, that's why he's our cereal senset.

Really, I am the same, say of Cereal.

I really want I.

Listened back to this podcast. I really am amazed at how much you know about Cereal. I'm like, how the heck is so cool?

Well, it's just something that I've loved my entire life, and now I get to talk about it.

He's made a career out of it that doesn't pay him.

That's right, Race as you do. I'm an intern on my own podcast. I make nothing.

Get Uncle Johnny in on one. He's the oldest intern on our show man all right.

He didn't wait, and Uncle Johnny actually asked us for a job because he needed to make money. He told us that he would file. We're like Johnny, nobody filed anymore. I see your butt crack when you bend down for the cereal sack.

So this is the bowl and basket the new milk from shop.

Right again, diets go downhill, the pants get a little tiner, the shirts go on bull and Scotty's butt crack comes out. You know it's getting towards Christmas.

When Scott, let's see what's in Scottie's book.

You know, I don't like these marshmallows. I'm just gonna say it.

Well, because because the marshmallows that ruined rice Krispies tree, So of course you don't like it.

This is stupid.

Why are they so small?

Yeah, you know what, they look bigger on the box where the box go.

He moved again, Scott, I'm not kidding. You probably put it on the floor.

He's gone dun.

You know you started eating already. Sorry, you never named your help on the shelf. According to your wife.

Ready, one two three Yeah, here we go one two three mm?

What okay?

It tastes like cake.

Wait, when you initially taste it, it's really good.

And then a second later, then the aftertaste is not good, and.

The consistency of the cereal is not good either, And you.

Can't taste the marshmallows because they're.

Two and there's very few of them. I give this one bowl, I'm sorry, bowling, a spoon and a spoon.

Yeah, it has an aftertaste like cardboard.

Damn it. I want them to like it so much.

Oh my god, that's so disgusting. The aftertaste is rancid that Do you.

Remember that song they had called time Bomb in the mid nineties Ramcid. No, Danielle, you remember it. Don't support him?

I'm sorry.

Hold on, Let's see what we have here in the system and see if Andrew knows any of them. Here's time Bomb, you already here we go.

Read kick it. No, No, there's a reason why people from black.

Coat, black hair, black hat, Cadillac. No. We did a Rancid show at Roseland in the city when I first started here, and we were the top forty station, but we were playing alternative music, so they were all like pose and they were lighting all the DJ's jackets on fire with their lighters. It was, oh my human newman, they lit his jacket on fire. I swear that was hilarious.

The way the milk tastes pretty good from this.

Let me try to make the sugar cooie milk.

I don't. I think I've just decided I don't like sugar cookies because that's like the taste almost was like butter cream, and it was too much.

However, it isn't a candle. The sugar Oh my god, you're right. The sugar cookie toast crunch was delicious. You loved it.

Yes, yes, it was different. I'm gonna eat candles new Yankee candle, all.

Right, candle cereal from cant.

Theyll brie for you and your belly. Christmas edition rolls on. I'm gonna go down to the cereal sack and get another one.

This one.

This is a classic cereal. It's been around for I don't know, one hundred years. But they color them differently for the holidays. You got us one for fourth of July.

I know what it is.

What it is, and the different holidays, different colors, same taste, sure.

Cinnabon, just kidding.

No, it's rice crispy.

Yeah, I knew that. Here's the thing.

They're gonna taste the same and rice krispies have no taste whatsoever.

They it's exactly this. But they are red and green and original color, which what would you call that? Tan? Beige. I don't know rice what colored? Like, what's this color? What's the rice? What's the color of rice crispy beige?

Yeah?

No, I have a question. So all rice chrispy is supposed.

To be healthier for you in your mind, yes, but because I'm thinking.

Maybe for people who don't like to give their kids cereal with like a lot of.

Sugar, second ingredient sugar. But I don't taste it. I don't know where it is.

It's no taste to it.

I think rice crispies are like a glorified bass for things like are you gonna make rice crispies like treats? Yes?

I mean here, smell. This smells like cardboard. There's just really no distinct smell. There's just no distinct smell. They're rice crispies.

I actually like rice krispies with banana. That's my favorite.

No, we don't put things in things.

Oh he doesn't like rice crispy and banana is delicious? Sorry purist. Ye, my mom used to make that for me every morning, and when I say make it, she poured a bowl of cereal and cut a banana.

Although when I was a kid, I used to put made. I used to put like full bowls of sugar in my rice crispies.

You put sugar in the rice crispy Oh yeah, spoonfuls.

A waffle, it's homemade. I put it in the toaster.

You put what in the toaster?

The homemade waffleys homemade on the box, so you can call it homemade. Hold on, hold on, hold on. They're crackling and popping and snapping.

No, it would be great if the whole microphone is in there.

Don't give me that one.

No, I'll have that one. Here you go.

Do you know how much like grossness is on that mic I didn't let it go in. This isn't very festive. This is like a holiday party gone wrong.

Yeah, but you know what this like this street.

This is one bowl not even no boring.

This is okay to make rice krispy treat with you to be colorful and nice.

I'm gonna get no taste. Hold but listen, you.

Don't have pop rops in your mouth.

You can hear them in your mouth.

Oh wow.

See, here's actually gonna be the test. Because we've done rice krispies now this is now the third time we've done rice Krispies because we did the regular, we did the red, white and blue ones, and now we do the holiday ones, and we probably raid them all differently. No, I'm talking about plain ones. Diamond as the executive force. Sir, you don't even know what you're talking.

About, the executive You don't even like to chew.

We've done three different varieties of regular original rice Crispies, and we've probably rated them. Yes, I did.

He's getting angry.

Come on, what do you write this one?

I give this three balls in a spoon. I likes me too.

Balls.

Okay, I don't mind this.

I'm actually, Danielle going to go back to the last episode where you did the red, white and blue ones and see what you rated that one, because it should be the same.

Did I take those with you?

You did? You brought it for USh? Remember? Yeah?

All right, so serial Killers. I'm noticing something though.

What there are.

Six cups left?

I just pulled him out.

That's depressing. I thought we were going to get more.

No, I only have one more holiday themed cereal?

Is it gingerbread?

Damn you? Andrew is shut up?

Jinks drinks?

Wait?

Where's gingerbread Cereals?

Back in town from life. Oh gingerbread spice.

That's gonna be good.

This comes out during the holidays almost every year for the last couple of years. You had I have not had it before because I'm not a fan of gingerbread. Same so before I did this podcast, I didn't need to try cereals for no reason. Now I do, so it's his job.

How many sponsors have you, guys, Gotte?

I'm sorry what you.

Still haven't got a sponsor?

Nothing?

That's ridiculous.

Nothing.

We chart on things now too.

No spoons, milk cereals, no balls, no supermarkets, no delivery services, no nothing.

Hey General Mills, remember when scary is doing the appearance? Have a nice day.

Hey Instacarte?

I love Instacart. I use it all the time too. I wish I could cereal killers.

However, I must tell you who supports us, because they follow us and they like us poop like a champion cereal. They're all about us. Post Cereals are all about us, and Grainberry Cereals they also follow us. Yeah, Post sent us the Twinkie US.

As if I hear of it.

You're our unofficial third member.

You know, we get we get the most responses when you're on people love you people. Oh I ripped the bag.

You people are really sweet, thank you very kindly? What oh forever both sides gott you did in the last episode too.

That's these cheap quaker bags. What are you doing?

He's getting angry.

Stop pulling Merry Christmas diamond.

Don't stop, all right, I'm very excited about this.

Hold on, Oh my god, last two I forgot.

Can you go ahead post edit?

No, no, I just do what he's doing.

No?

Any of this.

That's a ridiculous, stupid thing he does. There's no post show production. I don't add anything in.

He said to tell you your wife on text that we want a girl one. We have a boy one. Elf. Scotty said, go ahead and buy one.

No, Scotty said, we're not paying for any more Christmas craps.

I love Christmas.

I love Christmas too, and I'm glad that we get to celebrated in our house. But she just came home from home goods the other day with like three car loads worth of stuff. I'm like, dude, what is going on?

I would if I if like my apartment wasn't just you know, a one bedroom and I live by myself. I would totally decorate. You don't decorate and put up a little tree, because where am I really?

What am I going to do with it? Spreaking British guy, He's gonna come and kiss me all over my face and put British goo on me? Hi ra Hello, rob about nobody? Can nobody understands what you're saying? Anybody else's opinion? Would you like to try some gingerbread? Spice life?

Thank you?

Why bloody brit all right?

Chip chip cheerio, Merry Christmas.

You know I live with a bloody britt and he does not say chip chop.

Chip speaking of cheerios, chip chop all right?

This Christmas holiday is let's have some ginger bread.

You sound like that dead chef what's her name? Or missus doubtfire by you Ready? Here we go. It's disgusting.

It tastes like damn candles, like I'm eating a candle.

Excited.

Oh I do believe this box is terrible. I'm so mad.

I didn't like anything today.

Holy hell, that's discussion. That does How does that come back?

Can you give it a zero?

You give nothing nothing?

This is nothing. We've never done nothing.

Yes, we have look at the ratings and I sent you that you never posted.

Wait, let me taste it again, maybe a second time.

Okay, I'll go into I'm sweating. Did put the heat up again?

Nope?

Like try try, try try.

It tastes like the apple cinnamon candle. Right, yeah, but just like if I if I melted it and literally put a spoon and eat the wax better. Yeah, I agree excitedly.

They want you to make gingerbread crispy treats on the back. No, no, I'm so upset. I wasn't able to play this all right now.

We hate it. Should be ashamed of yourself, nicky.

I'm giving it, giving dry.

I give this two balls because it just tastes like life. When it mixes with the milk, it activates like this.

Terrible that's right, something or stuff in the middle.

I give it a spoon.

Yeah, I'm gonna give it nothing. I'm sorry.

I'm gonna give it one boneus spoon.

Don't you have something else under there in your sack?

I can, I mean, I can give you something else that you probably like, but I don't have anything else that's holiday related. I don't want to waste it.

I say, waste it, waste it, waste it, wasteick, waste it. I do believe we're just doing another bonus box.

Could you do two bonus boxes in one episode?

Okay, you know what, I'll do this one because a double bonus box. We never had a double bonus box.

You didn't have a jingle for that.

No, I don't double bonus box. So the reason with this kind of ties in to the whole Christmas thing is, you know you might make this Christmas morning. I mean, I know, pancakes, waffles, Cereal, French toast, is.

It Eggo Cereal?

No, that's coming back, but not yet. And Kellogg's is not our friends, so I don't think they're going to send us any preview boxes. Obviously, this cereal first came out I believe in nineteen ninety five. I'm sorry if I'm wrong, but I think it's ninety five. And guess who started baking it? Oh Wendel, Oh Cinnamon Toa's Grunch. Well kind of, it's a sister of it, Oh French Crunch. It is French toast. S It went away and by popular demand, came back in late twenty fourteen early twenty fifteen.

It is.

Yeah. Are you wait? Can Diamond have it?

No, Diamond can't have anything.

Can you have it?

Check the box Chrispy sweeten corn cereal? She cannot eat corn.

Diamond has something to say.

This is not ASMR. Get out of here, take the mic away from her place?

Do you already know this is a grosseral? Really good?

Up?

All right?

Wait? Can she have some?

No, there's corn and everything's stop it.

There's no corn on what she's eating though, No, but that she can have?

All right? All right? That smells a lot like syrup. Again, if I ate this and then made out with Amy, she would divorce me. No syrup. There's no syruple out in our house. The kids are not allowed to use syrup on pancakes and not allowed. And if we go to the diner, I don't like Cooper eat it because she'll get it on her shirt and then it goes back in the house and it contaminates the whole house.

About syrup.

She gags from the smell of syrup.

That's like me with mayo. Yeah, I understand.

So now I really don't eat syrup either. She's made me grow out of it.

I just wanted to let you know I'm here.

Name Simon, Oh dog with your mouthful diamond?

What do you do? What do you even do here?

I'm sorry? Excuse me? Are you kidding me?

I'm the star of this damn show.

God, there's so many cups. They don't even know that.

General Mills French toast crunch like Wendel made these especially for us. Here we go, Yes, five bowls? What?

No?

Yep?

Not five balls? Yep, three bowls in a spoon.

They're perfect.

I mean they actually really taste like a piece of French toast.

My mom never made French toast because every time she attempts it, she uses like the thinnest piece of toast possible, so it just melts.

And get calla French toast.

Well, we don't have kalla French toast.

Go to the diner they have it. I would think that there would be a little bit more maple taste than there is. That's good.

What did I give this three bowls in apoon? I'm giving it two bowls in taking back both.

I'm gonna do the three balls in a spoon. Andrew is five, Danielle two and a half a spoon.

I need to make this clear. People listening to this episode, listen to my review on this one.

You're one. Irot was going up. You're so angry.

Listen to me on this one. This is a delicious cereal. It is a welcome treat back.

It's a welcome tree from the other crap he just gave us.

I didn't true, I didn't say it wasn't good.

You gave it two bowls in spo. I gave it three balls in this Okay, then we could be friends. Danielle. On the other hand, I got to talk to you.

I mean, that's two balls in his Spoon's middle of the road.

It's the middle of the road. But it's a delicious tree.

But it's not as good as like Oreo.

I did not like the mega stuff Oreos.

Well, I think that was very exciting. Thank you for listening to the Christmas episode. Today's December? What Ninthember?

But then why are we shouldn't this be on December twenty fifth?

He doesn't even know what episode this is. He doesn't care, No.

It is it's episode sixty four. I know that in today's December ninth. I mean we could have done it later in the month because I want people to have a chance to go out and get these cereals for their Christmas breakfast table. Oh you're right, Oh, here we go, Diamond. You don't know what you're talking. You're like Andrew's little sister.

I have an older sister, and she's sweetie.

She reminds me of d from What's happening?

Right, She's never seen what's happening.

And Andrew's like, what what's happening? I don't know what that is?

Do you guys? Remember Chips episode six and season two.

That was a good one. That's what was That's when John Baker seven Mary three left the show and Nelson took over.

That.

That's the movie Eric, Yes, that's the episode where he crashed his motorcycle. I had to go to the hospit for real, and they did the whole series right around the actually in the bear. You know what I found out yesterday. This is like some insider stuff. You know. We're in Sagon, Aftra and Gregg. He's on the board of directors for Yes he is.

Hey, I used to love me. You know, I practiced kissing on my There was a hole in my v the Bear poster, there was a hole in the.

J McKay and his friend.

You know what it was about. It was about this trunk driver, hot truck driver, and he had a pet monkey, and he took the monkey with him and his name was Bear. The adventure. It was awesome.

It sounds like the eighties were a great time.

They were.

I so wish I could have seen this show.

It was a great show. You would have watched it.

You guys have like the season like a box.

I want to talk about Riverdale? I watched that too, I don't watch How about the Kardashi?

Oh god?

I love all things.

All right? Now, going to do the car as you did? You see that? Did you just fart?

I'm sorry, you're gonna take all the sound post production?

Probably, Hey, the mis soule tough.

I want to get to know.

No, here we go, come on, Andrew.

Jane m And there's not falling bear.

No that note. Thank you very much for listening to Serial Killers. It's episode sixty four. That's your boy, right there? No property shot?

Wait? Is Bear a monkey?

Bear?

A monkey? Why is this monkey called Bear?

Why do people name their dogs bear?

I mean, I guess you're right, this is a lames.

Yeah. Well the eighties there were theme songs for every show and these they don't do that anymore. This show left a couple.

Yeah, and that could give me a poster in my room.

Yeah. I really hope that there's a reboot of it and like coming out in the next couple of years.

Jamie Kain, here we go. Ready, Yeah, people in the truck, that's right.

Hey, do you remember when you were a kid used to do this to truckers? What are you talking about? We didn't do that. Who was hnging out with truckers?

Well, okay, that's a two part one one.

I would go like this and make the truck driver do it. But why are you hanging out in your truck driver stops?

You know, like when you're in a bus going somewhere in a bus you're doing.

Yes, every that's a thing. I was born in the nineties. I was born yesterday.

We gotta go.

I really hope Greg Evigan hears this. Maybe you'll be a guest on the podcast.

Did you breathe as a child? You weren't born in the AI. It's not a thing.

All right. Listen, I'm sweating. There's snot dripping out of my nose. We gotta go.

Did you guys have kids? Did you did you go swimming? Probably not?

Millennials, listen, Merry Christmas, everybody happy Hanakah and Kwanza and all those things. So enjoy your holidays with your family and eat some damn cereal. What do we say now, well, no, hold on, follow us please on social media? Serial Killers PC, that's cereal with the sea.

Sometimes Andrew will we'll comment.

Yeah. Every once in a while, I'll go on Facebook and do something I do. I saw you. You wrote back to that one girl, and I wrote back. I can't believe Andre actually did something.

You followed up to my message.

I sure check.

You are such an ass. I hope you get the coal for Hankah. Is that a thing? I hope we get eight days of coal?

Yes, yeah, we get coal. Yeah? All right, so idiot, yes, thank.

You very much.

Merry Christmas, Garretts.

Hold on Anthony now, Danielle.

I hope sad that brings you everything you want this Christmas.

Accept an appearance on Serial Killers, but until next time.

Such, oh my god, need a towel,