Andy's New Scotty Voice

All right, it should be red. Nope, it's red record and you want to record things that should be red.

Okay, Right, Trouble took it in with.

Welcome to Serial Killers. Fat Scary in the other studio, Andrew Scotti in here. Uh, this is the podcast where we talk about cereal. We eat it, we try it, we rate it, and you make your decisions based on that. Sure, we'll think inside the box for you.

Okay. Right, it's been five years. I don't know if it's ever going to catch on.

It caught on with me.

Yeah to you, I enjoy it. Okay. Uh yeah, Live from the Farmland Fresh Dairy Studios, this is Serial Killers.

And I guess it's officially Easter Monday. Is that a thing?

Yeah? I mean not for I don't know. I mean on the calendar it says Easter Monday. I don't remember ever having off for Easter Monday. Right, you'd always get off like that Friday. Good for eighty Thursday.

Oh wait, hold on, there's a bunch.

Let me Sunday.

The Jew in the room, let me go through. Let me tell me, tell me if I'm right. The Jew in the room will tell you.

Sure.

First of all, I know I don't know what it is. But we had ascension Thursday. Is that anywhere around here?

Uh uh?

We had good Friday. Yeah, Palm Sunday, Easter Sunday.

So Palm Sunday is like earlier. Okay, that's when you get your ashes and them. No, that's that's Wednesday. That's ashy.

Okay.

So there's Palm Sunday where you get a palm. There's ash Wednesday where you get the ash.

They saw the palms in the shop right right now. I just saw it.

That's great. Yeah, But Palm Easter Sunday is this Sunday.

And that's when like, no, that we just passed. It was yesterday.

Oh yeah, for today's today's Easter Monday. Yeah, got it, got it?

Got it?

So yeah, but we used to do Stations of the Cross at Catholic school.

What's that?

No, it's like the different stages of Jesus getting crucified, which is very very How could I put this dark? When you're in like sixth seventh grade, I've been watching like Jesus get tortured on across and it's you're like in seventh grade, and it's like a tone for your sins and It's like, what did I do? I went to e BOM's World. I know that was a bad website.

Hilarious, So yeah, fun, we have tone also, that's you, Kapoor.

I don't mind the thing of a toning. It's just we had to get ours. It was reconciliation. That was the sacrament you got in fifth grade. Yeah, and again, what are you confessing in fifth grade? Is that when you go in the box and talk to the crippy old man the priest. Oh yeah, so the priest okay, and then they buy law apparently can't blab about anything. It's like a therapist almost.

Oh they tell that's just like doctors, you know what after the doctor's appointment there, Hey, this guy that came in. You should have seen the chunk that he had on his butt, you know, I mean yeah, I mean they go out and they drink and they talk. Is there like doctor to doctor unhipified. I don't know. They just don't say names. I guess, yeah this guy.

That's true because I know some doctors who told me stuff like oh you want to believe, but they just don't say the name, right right right? Yeah?

Anyway, why do we eat some cereal? That'll liven it up. Sure, yeah, and then.

Let's do a twelve Do you know it was also an hour to do the Stations of the Cross because you have to do each one where it was like and then Jesus left, stop then they'd read and so you kids must love that for our presentation of it. You it was literally like.

Did you have to make a dialectram?

No, but I remember John Carnivale was Jesus Christ.

Oh yeah, yep.

They And it was crazy too because they like, they're like then they hang him up and all this other stuff, and it really is like, why in seventh grade are we doing Stations of the Cross with these twelve year olds? Sorry, I'm just I'm just speaking out loud here.

No, I get it. I just don't understand why somebody put beer in the Farmland fresh Ari's fridge. That's not very kosher.

Okay, Well, these are gonna sit here for the next six months.

Take the film of disgusting. Now, let's talk about all this on bull Chat, which will be coming soon. Right now, let's eat some cereal pals. Great, so this one is new and uh right, I repent, Thank you, Secret squirrel, Joel pointed, this one out to me at the shop right where they have the palms. It's new from Cashi Andrew. This is organic cocoa clusters. Okay, I think it's gonna be pretty good. Oh yeah, it's cocoa flavored clusters and

Fine.

You know, black and white cookies are so good. I still say that that's mainly a Northeast New York thing, Okay. You know, you don't really see and if you see them in other parts of the country, they usually package like Justin's, you know, like black and white cookies in the cellophane at the gas station, not really in the fresh bakery.

Yeah.

So it smells nice, it does. It smells like a black and white milkshake.

Oh yeah, does smell nice, right. I like the fluffiness of the cookie on a black and white cookie. That's the secret to me.

And you know, now, because some people are like, I don't like the black part and something they make full white ones, or I don't like the white part and they make full chocolate ones.

That's just a cookie.

It's just a cookie with the frosting ears.

Yeah you know, yeah, I will say some times the coating of the cookie frosting is almost like a sticker you can just peel off, like fondant. Fondant right, you are fond right. Anyway, she used the spoons that I got.

I don't like those. Plus Cooper touched it, and she's probably sick. What I don't know. Kids are always sick, right.

Like when they're in first grade, and then by the time they get to like fifth grade, everybody is all good.

Kids always have boogers in that I forgot.

She's training diaper still or moving anyway.

So form the fresh air is organic two percent produced fat milk. When you're at the dairy case, look for the cow face. Oo Hey, yeah, there we go. So we're gonna get that on the Kashi. Oh what, I just dropped it on my pants organic cocoa cluster.

It's because I have to sit so freaking close to this stupid microphone that's in my face.

We should get a proper studio. I would love that, like the old one we have with the big Cereal library behind us.

Crazy is that in this whole building full of studio, they didn't make room for podcasts.

Hmmm mmm, pretty good that my thinking.

I think four bowls.

Yeah, I like that.

I enjoyed.

I'm enjoying the crunch of the flakes. There was just a hint of vanilla to them, you know, then a little cocoa clusters. It's good. It's good cocoa.

It's a nice little pleasant cereal.

Yeah, pleasant, pleasant. Yeah. I think it's tasty, and I always hate it when mom said that. My mom would take tasty and I would cringe. I have a certain trigger words. Tasty was always one of them. Okay, I guess maybe I got over that one because I just said it. It's good though. I'm gonna also give it four balls. Andrew. That's nice.

But men don't seek therapy, they just start cereal podcasts.

That's right. Yeah, mmmm this.

I always hated that word, but I guess I just said it. So you're welcome.

Yeah. Well, we talked all about something on the show this morning that things that drive me nuts.

Everything does.

No, there are just some things and I can't help it. You on per can No, I can't like when people slurp. It just goes through me like like nails on a talkboard.

You realize whenever you're anxious to go like this, you do happy hands.

I don't know. It was a good cereal.

You're applauding and sign language.

Find it all the way to the right, all the way to the left of all the other cereals. This is like the healthy cut type stuff. You know.

Yeah, that was good.

Kashi's more mainstream now it used to be Cosha used to be like all the healthy stuff. Now there's so much stuff.

Yeah. Don't they make bars too? They do?

They make everything? Yeah, Kashi, I don't know. Ooly, actually, I don't know if they make bars anymore. Okay, they might not. Okay, So why don't we move on to cereal number two? And these next two cereals came from our friend Matt. You know, thank god for Matt. If it weren't for Matt, we'd be low.

You're the best, Matt. We love you.

He's pretty good the best, but he's good.

We love you, Matt. Thank you.

He sends me pictures from the story. He's like, hey, man, you need this, And by the time I get back to him, he's left the store, like, you know, three days ago. So he just buys it anyway. So he sent us a big old giant box. And in that big old giant box is what Well, here's one of them. It's very heavy.

Goodness.

My only problem is the flap is open. Do you think he injected the bag with like cyanide or something.

If it did, I welcome the sweet release of death.

Well, uh, it's a family size Millville frosted flakes. Now Millville. Can you tell me what store that's sold in? Andrew? That is somebody's brand in come on in Perkins.

That's a restaurant that's sold in the Pickley Wiggly.

No, it isn't.

That is sold in shop right, don't even that is sold in Aldi All d yes, I know how he should have known.

That side and the generic polar Bear on the front, they are good. That's Smedley, Smedley. I don't actually the Captain Crunch Cronies has a Smedley in it. Oh look, frosted flakes are generally just frosted flakes of corn. Does does this one say of corn?

It says sweetened flakes of corn cereal.

Look, grab a pencil it you got a character kid on the back there you can make creatures.

Oh god, this is very heavy, actually, creature creator.

Okay, so look, for the most part, your store brand frosted flakes, raisin bran, any of that stuff, and they're all basically the same. So I have a feeling it's gonna be pretty highly rated. Our Farmland Fresh Airy is two percent organic milk. There you go, Andrew your spoons right there.

Thank you.

Smells like corn flakes. Let's see, it's quite sweet. You're very sweet.

Mmm.

I feel like it's almost sweeter than your average frosted flake. You love it? Yeah, I have a bi bowler for me. Wow.

I always love frosted fleas. You really can't mess it up, although some people have can't go wrong.

Okay, yeah, So would you say that froster Flakes is kind of like your go to?

I would?

Yeah.

Really, it's like if it's there between that. My mom always has frosted flakes or crunchberries.

Is that your top dog frosted flakes.

Topdog law dot com?

No, we don't give them stuff here, seriously, they don't pay yet. This is good four balls, Andrew, because frosted flakes are just always across the board pretty good.

Yeah, you can't go wrong, you really can't.

I love the creatures on there.

That's cool. Yeah, yeah, anyway, again, this is Aldie.

You know you got the Aldie and you got the Leedle. Yeah. They are the competitors from the from the Germany over there, from the Germany. Yeah, what is it Europe? They're over there, that's where they started.

Great, all the and legal are not the same.

No, they're not.

And they're not even friends.

That's correct. They're enemies.

Oh wow, okay, I always thought it was just like you and I. Oh really, why are we enemies?

Well, you know we think differently.

Is it because we're two guys who love cereal? Scott has extensive cereal knowledge and Andrew to crunch and learn. They are two longtime co workers, and together we'll give you their comical review of one classic and one brand new serial in each episode.

Wow, we had to change that. That's old.

Were hardly scientific rating system? Oh holtho if I read that wrong.

We really need to change that.

There are two longtime co workers that together will give you their comical review of one classic and one brand new serial in each episode dot dot dot with their hardly scientific rating system. Grab a box, bowl and spoon and come along for the ride.

We definitely need to update that. That's from the very beginning. Remember we used to only do two. Yeah, maybe we should go back to that model.

You tried that, remember, yeah, very like two episodes what five episodes ago? You were like, we're doing two again, just to pad it out, and then all of a sudden you came back and you're like, here's another one, perfectly cure writer.

Well, because Matt keeps sending these massive action car writer complain, we'll be back right after this what happened, and we're back true racial coodlat Listen, you have seventeen different voices for me. I love them all, but I mean that that one's like that's a muppet voice.

Or it sounds like the something from pee Wee's Playhouse.

I love pee Wee's Playhouse.

Yeah, Jackie, that was her favorite and fun fact, she had a doll with the string and it was pee Wee. Yeah, he would laugh, yep, terrifying. We buried it in the house across the street from us, and to this day, yes, because they were building a house on top of it and we were like, let's put the doll in there and then maybe it'll like haunt them.

Are you serious? Yeah, that's a horror movie. Yeah, that's so cool. Is it still there? Do you think?

I hope so. I mean the bulldozers and stuff.

Really, how far down did you put them? Six feet?

I mean it was like a mound of dirt, Like when I tell you, it was like a mountain of dirt that was at least like a story high. And we used to like roll down the mountain. It was disgusting. I don't know why her parents let us play in dirt like that.

I used to go time my Tonka truck when they were doing the dig doing the sewers in the street. I was outside with my Tonka truck just playing over.

We would just like roll down the dirt mound. That's not great. But anyway, we put the TV Herman in there and now maybe in the floorboards at that person's house.

That's very interesting. And then maybe they hear could you imagine if someone pulled the string?

Oh god?

Anyway, Uh, here's another one for Matt. This is from Kiggins. This is your store brand that is in some stores. It's not uh well, this one, this particular one is from Say and Save a Lot, you know, but I believe that they're in more than one store. Kiggins is kind of like Cisco ish, you know, where they go to a lot of different stores. Yeah, it's just it's kind of like a generic It's a generic brand that you might see in more than one store, you know.

Yeah, Cisco. Okay, enter the dragon Thong song.

Thought that was the name of the album. Wow, look at you, I know the album. Oh I'm burping up like some Italian food from earlier.

How much did you have? How much did you have?

I didn't have all that much? Actually, okay, so this is honeypuffs? He's it gonna be your smacks or your you know, sugar crisp.

Or do you really have to try hard to f up? Because I love these types of serials.

What's that bear's name? Oh Butcher? What butchy?

Butcher? Butcher the buyer? Why do they always have Southern accents for me?

Because they look like that. They just look like they look at they're like rednecks.

Got these room the gold Bawd.

And moments later he's going to be shot by a bowhunter. See he's all excited. Now what what? I don't know?

Well, this episode is taken on a grim. It started with the stations of the Cross and truly it's gone south ever since anyway.

So honeypuffs from Kiggins.

Carnie Bowl use the box as a stage to create your own side show.

Farmland fresh areas two percent reduced fat milk.

They are really really trying hard with this.

It's ultra pasteurized.

Andy, who's setting this up at the stage while they're eating cereal with their honeypuffs.

Look, they got to give him something to do otherwise, you know what. At least it's a little bit of effort rather than just putting the same on the front in the back that a lot of the boxes do. Here you go, pal, No, you're right, the intern's got to do something. Yeah, true, hours don't here we.

Go hmmmm hmm.

Yeah, that's a nice tastes like a.

Smack five bulls. I love honey smacks really yeah hmm. It's pretty close to the original, which it is.

We've done a few of these lately. We did the Wegmans one.

Yeah, but they're bland. This has like the perfect amount of sweetness.

Pland do you remember what you gave those because I'll look it up right now.

M m m hmmm.

At Cereal KILLERSPC dot com. Get all the ratings. You gave it five right now this I'll give it four in a spoon. It's good cereal, solid, it's a good store brand of you know of a name brand accurate? I got yeah, me too. Sport anyway, he wins arbor day? Did we miss it?

Is that trees?

I want to plant a tree woodsy owl.

Okay, you have a hoot. Don't pollute.

I don't know if he says that anymore.

They changed, They changed a lot of their Are you watching the floor?

No firew that game with the floor falls out with what's his name?

That is not it? If you're about to see the game show called the floor the game show, yes, yes, but they don't fall through the floor whatever.

Same thing.

They lose the competition, they say, okay, you can leave now right right.

Did you see the Robb Blow thing in Hollywood where he walked out in the street and one of those tour buses had no idea who he was, and he was so angry all the passengers did with the tour guide had no clue. To hire people that are clueless, You know, I would have known Roblow. He remember he was here.

Any new celebrity you would be like, no, does it exist? Pass?

I just wouldn't know anyway. Thank you for listening to Serial Killers. Please check out our friends on Instagram at Farmland Fresh Dries.

We're serious that you should go on the floor.

Though, No, it's too much pressure.

The floor is fun, though.

I did chain reaction. That's about all I can handle.

Do you know what the show does? Though?

The lights are so hot?

Yeah, I mean you have to stand on the floor for like.

All eyes are on you. It's a lot of pressure, a lot of pressure. Okay, I'm not a pressure guy. I don't like it.

Okay, anyway, maybe you should have listened to Melon Robbins.

No, I don't go.

I don't go for that stuff. I love being anxious.

Yeah, it's pretty good, that's right. What is that on the screen there? Can they see that?

No? Okay, but if they could, they know that the call that's is there that never gets answered and it's right over my face.

So yes, thank you for listening to Serial Killers. Follow us, like us, subscribe and just gonna put the YouTube up of this. Yes, if you'd like to watch us, go to our YouTube channel and subscribe there too. Maybe we can make fifty cents tool.

And like our clips that we're uploading too.

I like I like your clips. I like when you do that. I think they're funny. I think they're cute. Most of them make me look stupid, but I don't care. Okay, you know what. It's all for the show.

It's all for the show. It's just a character. When the mics are off, I become Scott not Scottie.

I disagree, but okay, different man. Anyway, thank you for listening. We'll see you next week with another Serial Killers and uh stay tuned for a bowl chat on the way yay could be next.

Who knows, who knows?

Crunch