Hi everybody. It's me Katie asaurus pain. It's me. Hey good and we're in the same room. We are welcome to season two infinite Quest. Oh yeah baby it's official. It's officially season 2. I officially live in Georgia. Leases have been signed boxes have been moved. It's going down and we all had really all to all of you. So really, thank you so much with your support. Art during the move and your support while we were on the road stuck in Oklahoma and calling tow trucks and retin.
You all's, we could not have done it without you just thank you from the bottom of our hearts, really. But from here on out season 2 of The Quest is gonna be the first season where we do it completely together in the same room. Yeah. We don't have to send every file 2,500 miles just to see each other. It's it's it's going to be pretty nice.
Pretty excited about that. So this is our first live episode from play on con we About nerd versions in gaming and what gaming has done for us as our diversion people. And also, just as people, it was a really fun time. The crowd was very responsive. There's a brief Q&A section at the end where people have some really nice questions, but here's that episode and thank you so much again for everybody.
Thank you so much. Thank you so much to everybody at play on con for having us. It was just a lovely time, very hospitable just just delightful. Without further Ado, here is our very first live episode. Transition, son of a bitch. Hi everybody. It's me. Katie story. Hey it's me a good. And we are live and play on kind of mistake of looking at the audio and I just want to go Sorry in advance for this huge. Welcome to season two. Yeah, this is season.
The first-ever we didn't know I Seasons work, so we got to episode 50 up season one. And then we just decided 50s, a nice round number. We're gonna be a play on constantly go. And then we got trapped in Oklahoma. There really isn't a whole thing, it's a whole week, but we were trying to figure out what we wanted to talk about, and we've touched on this before we touched on it earlier during the Roundtable.
And we've talked about it together in certain contexts, but just over the last A couple days being in the car together for 34 hours straight. And thinking about being here, where I don't want to be for you Katie, but I've been slowly, like opening doors in my head and turning over rocks and realizing how much did the Rocks taste like fruit?
The rocks of Essex, like 40 pounds, baby, topically, hilarious, what I've been turning over and I've been realizing how the weird sometimes subtle sometimes not It always that gaming in general, whether it's LARPing video games which we've talked about on the podcast before tabletop gaming. Car gaming has in a lot of ways. Helped me illuminate, certain parts of my brain that I otherwise would have particularly when it comes to my ADHD and depression expound expel.
Oh well no this is a two-minute episode. I'm okay, that's good. Thanks for coming out everybody. Nice, nice, nice. Well, I was thinking earlier today and again we talked about this a bit of the Round Table. Hold on. I need a crinkle this bag into the my cute closer. There you go. Yeah, I'm leaving it all in. I'm leaving it in. See this is that's I just yeah it's fine. It's authentic its own aesthetic. Experience is what I was thinking earlier today about
How? When I'm let's say, I'm playing a boss monsters. One of my favorite card games, it's a dungeon building game. So you have you have Heroes that come out into in like Heroes that come out, each turn of the game and you build a dungeon such to kill those here. It's basically, you gain points from killing Heroes you lose points when they hurt you, it's awesome, highly recommend.
But the idea behind the game is you know there, there are certain cars that work well with other cards, you know, like a card game is and finding out what the best version of a play is given the I'll have one of my favorite things in the world. It's so satisfying to go all in a play this which doubles the value of this card, which and then I have this spellcard, I'm gonna be like bound to slap it on the table.
Like that's so satisfying to me. But because people with ADHD have working memory, akin to somebody who's very invades advanced in age. So we have that sort of slow. What was I? What was it again? Oh I thinking like we do that and so when I arrived at that conclusion, when I realize, this is how I want to play these
cards. This is how I'm going to win this game or this is Joke, I'm going to make when I play this whatever it is. I have to get there several times because every time I get there it fades away it's sort of like I'm trying to think of an analogy sort of like I don't know if you were to draw like a word on the beach and then the waves wash over it. And then come back and it's gone again but you can still kind of see it and then you can draw it
again and then you can still kind of I have to get there several times over and over until eventually it stays there for long enough to me to actually play a turn that goddamn game and play. And that can be very frustrating with other. People. And I used to be, and in some ways, still am. Very insecure about that because I feel like I'm taking away from the experience of other people in the game.
And I played with people who, like, get really mad at me and game and I play with people who are just extremely accommodating and very nice about it. And over the years, my acceptance of that, part of myself of like, oh I have this
disorder, it's a whole thing. One of the symptoms of that disorder is that my working memory is garbage and that's just is what it is. And I can Up strategies, to make that to alleviate that I can communicate with people hope they understand that, that kind of stuff is going to happen, and if that's not okay, then perhaps don't play blocks monster with me because that's what's gonna happen and learning to accept that and learning to just go. That's the way it is and that,
you know, that's who I am. And that's just fine. It kind of opens this weird door, that's kind of scared to approach of holy shit. What other areas of my life? Am I really insecure about that? I've been forcing myself to nor trying to not Cept my the entire 27 years of my life that I need to just go, you know, that's just the way it is. And if there's somebody who enters my life, who who can't deal with the way that I pack for a trip, or the way that I go
shopping. Sorry, that's what it is. You know, bold of you to call that packing. I also I also want this is nothing to do with anything but I just need to acknowledge that like five minutes ago. Yeah, you said yes I try to think of the best version of a play and And immediately I went well, is it the Ian McKellen Hamlet, or the, or the, or the David Tennant. And I have not list. I'm not a Tenon.
I say this with every piece of love that I have for you in my heart, I have not listened to a fucking word. You said, because I've been trying to decide what my favorite version of Hamlet is like, I was like, he's gonna stop talking at some point and I'm going to have to, like, make a joke or something, because he's gonna know that I wasn't listening, but he doesn't ended question. I was thinking about David Tennant, wearing a t-shirt for
one. I mean, I'm saying this to a person with two masters degrees and Shakespeare. So I got my already lost play, and I got really distracted. I'm sorry, it's play. It's in the name of the convention. Kitty. It is how you're gonna, you're gonna Fair? Well, yeah, maybe like, feeder, where you McKellen? My gosh. First off, it's got to be the David Tennant version because it's Patrick Stewart as a ghost. It's amazing. Oh my God, it is pretty good but also don't worry. Katie, I got you.
Thanks bud. I'm not ready for that. I really mean it. I'm not I'm not doing this. I'm I'm not know. Part of me is mad or insecure or many things. I trusted you too. Now Be sure to wrap because it's rabbit into something relevant buds being butts butts being buds but like genuinely. Like I I've had it. That's another thing. I've had a lot of people get mad at me for well they'll do like a whole thing. They'll like give me an
impassioned speech or something. But because a bus drove by that was exactly the color of my parent's car when I was a kid, suddenly I went on a whole thing, remembering the swimming trips to the YMCA, just off for 20 minutes and all of a sudden they like stop talking and are looking at me for an answer and I'm like, oh God man, I'm so sorry.
Like and I feel generally I feel like I've insulted that person and I and over the years after I've learned more about about ADHD and my ADHD and how it manifests for me. I've it's sort of in some ways sort of success like a litmus test. Yeah we're you know if you can't deal with that then perhaps we're not destined to be super close friends and that's fine. You don't have to be amazingly close friends with people but you should accept yourself and you can I don't think you should.
Deny who you are to just meld, I don't want to make too much larger of a point that I'm trying to make great, but I watched you dangerously beer beer, beer, yeah. Okay, so here's my question. Then friend, do you know, do you feel like, no? Sorry, cool. Thanks for coming out, everybody. Bye. I will do that joke nine more time. So feel free to laugh. Like every time I fake stop podcast because my favorite joke to make I do, it's like I do that.
And then I also That that same year olds action is going to come out and recruit us to The Avengers at the end of the podcast. That's also my second favorite joke to make you think you're the only superhero in the war. I know. I know. But whatever you say is, do you think that then like the action of like, not the action but like the way that gaming Works, do you think that it is highlighting your strengths bless you? Or do you think it is highlighting your insecurities or both?
Oh, I definitely think hard. To hitting questions goodies into those good. I definitely think both also bless you. Not because you sneeze just in general. You can't just throw up. I definitely think it's both. And I think and I think that's a good thing I do because gaming is gaming. If done in the way that I think gaming should be in a way that's like respectful and safe and and, and welcoming and accepting
great. It's It's a place that's it's a safe place to be able to forget something or to be able to have time Linus and not realize that you've taken ten minutes looking at your cards because they're a high State, their situations in your life, where that's a big deal, you know, if you're driving your car and you have a severe lack of working memory that like, oh, that's right. The stop lights on or whatever. There's situations where ADHD symptoms are dangerous.
Do you know if you wanted HD on average? Live 13, untreated HD, live 13 years less than people without it. I didn't know that you You know that I did shout out to DJ PJ, I'm gay. I'm good old Deidre Peters. Go follow a DJ P. JM D. On on tick, check, he's fantastic. But there are high stakes situations where we're testing yourself to see how good your memory is, or whatever is really bad or really danger? I don't say bad but it's dangerous, Thai sticks.
If you mess up, it's really bad. But in a gaming setting it's just it's just a game, the stakes are low. And if you're with people that you love and accept and who love and accept you, then it's okay to have. Those things in to explore those parts of your brain and figure out is this something I can get better at and develop strategies
about. Is this something that I have to accept, you just, I told you just did your I disagree with your face well here because because my, my initial risk my immediate initial response was no. The point is to win Eric and if you don't win, what's the pay like if you're not good because that's that's that's me.
That's that's my thing is, I is I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings but I do want to absolutely Destroy you and and just prove my dominance in like that's why I don't play Settlers of Catan anymore because I've lost too many friends because like that's because that's like my thing and I like, but I know that about myself and like, that's why I don't like play games with people. I don't know. Very well. Huh. Because like, my like weird, like burnt out gifted kid brain
is like, I must win it all kind. Never use that voice before, but that's what it looks like inside my head. How did you arrive? How did you arrive at that conclusion, that you, because of that, you Shouldn't play games with certain because it's because it's no fun to play with the jerk. Who's like, I must win at all cost, except that, I am going to apologize for everything at the same time because I don't want to hurt your feelings, which is
a very, it's, it's frustrating. It's frustrating to play games like that but also haha to take your point and to build upon it. Oh my God. I know is it? That is that's how I feel a lot about like just life in general. Is that my like my whole thing is Is like, I want to be the best, but also, I will apologize the entire time because I feel like I'm probably inconveniencing, you somewhat in my quest to do. So my infinite Quest, if you
will. Hey, There It Is. She said the name of the show in the show. Do you think you recognizing that that happens in a gaming setting? Do you think that I don't know what the term would be? If it's make better? Or do you think that remedy? I don't say remedies it makes it sound like it's an awful thing. Yeah. You think that makes this idea that you have to win at all costs but also you feel really bad about and have to apologize.
Do you think you noticing that in a gaming setting makes that again, I want to choose my words carefully but I also do want to just pause for 327 like 10, 10 s. Tensing was about but screw it. Did you think it makes it worse in real life having noticed that in gaming or do you think it's sort of different version of the question? You asked me? I built it. I did something different. I started playing D&D. Oh, she's you don't, you can't win. Oh yeah. Is that why?
I dear listeners and dear audience? Hello, we recently started playing Minecraft? Yeah. And I can tell that it does something to / for you. I don't know if it's like a good thing or a bad but it definitely is something's happening up there. I'm wondering because Minecraft isn't a traditional game where like you defeat the thing and then you're done like you can never beat Minecraft.
You're just always Billy. Also, I want you to know is like infinitely stressful to me that you can't because I have spent a lot. Like the amount of time that I've spent thinking about the fact that I will never find all the diamonds in Minecraft, like it. Physically hurts me on the inside of my brain, but I've accepted that and I've moved on with these are the things that I worry about in my life. I'm like, I'm never gonna find them all. It's like the opposite of
Pokémon, huh? But yeah, but that's why I like 2nd so much because there's no there's no like there's like you achieve a goal but you achieve a goal together run so and so but that's what I like. But then then like to sort of like I'm gonna keep making like a little sandwich of like the Fucking point. But then also then that becomes a conversation about managing minor divergency if you will at
the gaming table. She said you know but like use one that panel them but then that becomes that becomes the comp the the competition. The competition that becomes the conversation is it becomes like okay so I know that like I Deeply and fundamentally loathe playing Settlers of Catan, which I know is a very unpopular opinion but it's fine. I accept it. The Sabres. I refuse to play munchkins like Chris loves munchkins.
He loves it so much. We have like, every expansion at her house, I will not play that goddamn game. You could not pay me money to play that game. But like that I play D&D and it's like, okay, well there's no specific. Like it's a goal, it's an accomplishment that you're achieving together with whoever you're playing with, but then it's like, okay, but now I have to create a system. Where I can accomplish that.
I have to create the, the means by which to do that and then that becomes like the real-life sort of like I don't want to say the word Quest but like the the goal is like okay, because I know that like I can't do a five-hour DND session like I can't I can't do it. My brain, my brain can't people are like yes in the audience and then like on top of that, it's
like like at the table. It's like, I have to have something to do. I have to have a Inning wheel or something cool, you know, and, and, and that kind of thing. And so then it becomes like a gate, like not like a game but like a, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, I know, I did. I like to just Trail off. Well, that's that's great. Is it just a just like Dandy? You never like reach the thing? It just constantly. It's a dragon. What?
Why would ask like? So we're gonna do the I am a relatively new D&D player who are there to the majority of The people I've met in the last year or so and I'm like in real time having those experiences of like I can love playing Dean. It's like one of my favorite things to do but minor emergencies. My ADHD and my depression they get in the way free. My ADHD is like it's sort of like why am I thinking of analogies that don't need to exist, who cares? It's like it's slow.
Well oh God gaming analogy. Boom you know when you have like a boss that has a lot of health and Won't you don't have any like, really heavy hitting moves, so you just have to, like, pick away at it with arrows. You know, just slowly. Yeah, that's sort of what my ADHD does. Like the toolbox in the, in the logo that I never mind. It takes two.
Yeah, remember the Tyler. Yeah, the toolbox, that was a weird week and a half and we're streaming that game that was very weird and then, they just kind of, never mind, you know what don't? Anyway, let's play that game. If you're, if you're the people that made, it takes you, it's a beautiful game, totals Grand job but you You you need to go to therapy. I don't know who hurt you and why. But for fuck's sake? What an elephant ever do to you. She's okay.
Oh some people have played. Thanks to okay. Okay but it's my THC is sort of like that picking away thing where my depression is more like your big move that you get like one of every whatever. When you just, what is it going? I'm thinking this is. Look, you look like Matt Damon and the 1990s movie, okay, this better then, why did you Agent. That's valid. That's why I'm sorry. It's all I could focus a little change it again. You look like you were going to be really good at math.
Yeah. Yeah that's the one arun's whereabouts. I was going for Good. Will Hunting / rounders kind of scares you. You did look like you're going to try and scam me at poker later. Cool. All right, I gotcha. So anyway about that cool point that I'm sure you were making. I'm sure I'm sure it was cool but my ADHD was like the picking a Say where's my depression?
Is like a big like it's your. It's your why attack if you're a if you're an Xbox player or its you're trying to attack if you're a PlayStation player or whatever where my ADHD in like let's say a D&D session. Let's say a three hour one which is fucking long. If it each day long, it's long in general, but it's really long.
If you have any HD like I want to be able to play D&D for for three hours straight, but the entire time I ADHD is picking away from the outside just like you're forgetting that number that you needed to remember, you're forgetting what static correlates with you're forgetting. You know, is it was an animal handling or was it intimidation. You're all the whole time, none of them are catastrophic, but they're all just debilitating, just poking away. Poking away, poking away your fight.
Where's my depression? Is like the why we're at any moment? All the sudden, boom, health bar reduced to zero. I am done with this game and that happens to me all day. Every day of my life. We're like right now, as we're recording this, my ADHD is making me forget points. My ADHD is I'll think of the word that I need but then I was away but then it comes back with an it goes away again. And my depression is just behind the corner. Just waiting, just waiting MIT
just deciding whether or not. It's going to decide to come around while we're sitting here in front of these people. And that's fine. That's the reality that that we use in our diversion, people exist in, is that we live with those things. And that's just is what it is and gaming can serve as an amazing. I don't know if it's a canvas or or Arena, but that's not a bad.
I like thinking of my mental health as a battle but D and D is, I'm now in real time having that experience, overlaid onto the experience of playing ADHD, which I love. And I also play it with people that I love. So it's a very intimate, very important pointing experience. And it's almost like, I'm introducing my ADHD in my depression to this new, like I have a, this new, like girlfriend or something, who's, like, coming in. And I'm like, do you like I had a point, but you've had your
finger on your nose for a while. So, I'm curious. What was the question, okay. You know what I was gonna say is that I won. Things that I think is really interesting because I've played D&D for a really long time. Is the pressure that I feel to it.
Like, I notice a like conform Nan, but like, the pressure that I feel to, like, fit in at a table that is not built for me and like, and really like and I don't like I'm really nervous to tell the story because I know the person whoever it telling the story about listen to the podcast. But like I'm going to tell the story because I feel like it's
important. But so I play a couple of different games 15D D. And we were one of the people that I play with was talking about how frustrating it was to play the one of the games that I'm in, because we only ever stream for like an hour and we, you know, we play for an hour and and they're, they're saying that like, it's just so frustrating because I can't get anything done. And it's something that an hour short.
Yeah. And they're saying that an hour of short and they like and there's like a big like rant about it and stuff and I was sitting there and I was like I'm the reason why we only play for an hour. Because during session 0, like I looked at our DM and I was like, I can't do before our session like I can't, I cannot do it and so they made the decision like instead of just like recording for hours at a time, we would just do one at a time and it
would be fine. And so then and then everybody else dropped in and they were like, yeah, like it'd be so nice. I can we just please get more done. I was like oh cool I'm just gonna. Yeah, yeah, it's cool. And so then I was like well what it? Because I want to keep playing and I really like the game and I love the character but it's like II don't know how to mitigate like that conversation. When it's like, I'm the one
who's like? Well I can't because my brain gets itchy like well, I think I mean, it's like, embarrassing, you know. Yeah, I for one. I mean, I'm I don't know what it's worth, but I am genuinely proud of you for doing that. That's not easy. I really mean it and I'm sorry that it happened a little bit. He's okay. And you don't owe them an explanation. He just don't. What was your question that was like, 10 years ago?
But No, but I call my gosh it's happening in real time in front of people it's hey though it's fine. I'm on it. I don't care, it's cool. Normally when this happens when we're just recording together, I can just cut this part out but now it's like let's find the bear witness to Bear, witness. Yeah, thank you very much. We thought about editing or anything out like all of my like And then we're like, we don't have a 12 hours. Well, I was thinking I have this to those.
You're spinning prop game. Yeah, it's pretty strong hand. Prop game is just like, overnight that she had to those listening, my firt. My foot in explicably got hurt as his wants to happen with people with ADHD and so I'm walking around the cane and I'm loving it. I feel like I should be diagnosing people with like staphylococcus. There's something like that, you know. Yes the incredibly rare disease of Staff. That's not very so it's not that's the joke you're making. Yeah.
I'm kind of caught up. I got up. I'm like, I like I always say I'm like that little fish that swims beneath the shark, you know, pick her up because of all the scraps, you know, I'm a little behind you, when I'm there. No. But what I want to say, I think something that I would love for people to understand about ADHD. I remember the first time I heard someone say this was, it was Thomas C, Brown, who used to be the director of the Yale. It was the Yale was not program.
It was the Yale department or something like that for attention and Related Disorders, you know, as a private practice in California, by the way, But he said the important thing to understand about ADHD is one that everybody experiences the symptoms of ADHD. That is universal. Human Experience. We all forget things, we all misplace our keys. We all do something and we think it's only been a couple minutes when really?
It's been a very long time or we think it's been a very long time when it's actually been a very short time, we all do that, but the thing about ADHD is it happens all the time and really, really badly and importantly, not by choice. It's not a matter of I can play for Hours. But screw all of you. I'm putting my, you know, my needs in front of all or my wants in front of your needs. Like I'm deciding that I don't want to do this because I'm
selfish or something. I cannot like when I was a kid, I was trying to do the reading for class. I loved the subjects, I was studying, I would love to do the reading. I could not because I couldn't get more than a couple sentences before the sentence. It's that I had read had drifted away like smoke and the new ones were coming in and I think that's really important to understand. So in a DND context when you're saying like, Like I can only play for an hour.
I'm not saying like after an hour I'm gonna be like, I don't want to play after an hour. My brain is going to start to turn in on itself. Yeah, I'm going to start forgetting what your names are. I mean, why don't you speak for you? But for me, it's like, I'm gonna
start forgetting your name's. I'm going to start forgetting like what day it is. I'm going to start forgetting what time it is. And after three hours, like I'm going to just be sitting there like just grunting thinking I'm talking like it's not a matter of wants versus like it's I need
this. I'm not going to play if we get to I can't play and I think that's really important understands and I think and again in a gaming context it can be if done the way that I like to play games, it can be done in a place where it's safe to do that. We're be the people you're with or accepting and they're trying to elevate each other. Not just I mean it's like he's accompanying a lot of games are competitions are still trying to win. Yeah, but it's done in a way.
I like to play games in a way where you're safe and you're accepted. If you say those things and I think gaming can be can be A really amazing I get sort of thing to Overlay that on yeah you know because it's fun and it's whimsical in their bright colors and shipped. Without the question, I want to ask you is because since I'm coming to the DND world, like relatively new ish, my ADHD in my depression or interacting with ADHD and did my ADHD
depression in real time. And I'm, I'm found my, I'm finding myself and this Zone that I've been in so many times before when I start a new hobby or start reading a new thing or start trying to play new. Some music or something, where I have to develop new strategies to manage minor diversions. And so you lovely experienced player. I was wondering, I mean you were diagnosed with ADHD more recently than I but I was wondering, well, what do you do
during a DND session? Let's say you're the middle of it and you session and for whatever reason like you want to keep playing and you know, like, what are you, do you have strategies? I do. I have a lot. I have a lot of strategies. What and I think honestly like it ties into the fact that I was diagnosed so late because I didn't know what I was dealing with. I just know.
No, I just knew that if I wanted to do the thing that I fucking loved to do, I had to figure out ways to keep up with with everybody else. And so, like our three where I'm like, white-knuckling through, I still had to have a system, so I could participate because it but that was the thing is like I like I noticed my performance like as you know, as like time goes on but I mean a lot of them are like, this is the part where I go. We'll have you considered like
talking to each other. Like it's like the like really like No one class. But like I mean a lot of my stuff is really just 101 stuff. Like I take notes like weirdly copious notes but I also get like a very specific notebook. I have like a very specific notebook that I buy off at Amazon and it's laid out a very certain way and it's because there's like a bar and a bar and a box in a box.
And so, like my info goes here and my, like, my like play info goes here, and my doodles go here, because you got to have doodle space. That's like, Whole thing to hear it. The knotting, the not, I'm validation, but yeah, like and you know, but then also like that's a separate conversation. Like this is this is going to get really weird and conceptual really very quickly but like
they're like. Okay. So I have my little Dino, Dino fidget toy but like the dino fidget toys like step a of like BC and D because it's never just I have a dino toy, right? It's But I know toy. Hey DM, just so you know, like I'm gonna have a little dino toy because whatever. Now, I got to answer questions about the dino toy. Like now I got like, drove great, do you think? And so that's the thing. It's like. And I remember like so good when
hold on, I'm gonna get it back. Wait for it, wait for it. Okay, fuck was I talking about? Jenna told ABC. Ah, ha ha, thank you. Um, when I was in school, I used to get in trouble all the time for not paying attention because I was drawing and I was like, no, that's how I pay attention. Like, I have to be drawing something but like I will I draw
robots. Like that's the weird little Doodles that I do. I drew I make up little robot, guys, but as I'm drawing the robot, I'm like, listening to the thing and I'm going, okay, like so when I drew this robot like that was, when we were talking about, you know, I don't know, like, Woodrow Wilson and then like, okay, now like we're going like, you know, so like I associate what I'm doing but
like I always will I have ADHD. So I need to over explain Thing but to an outside Observer who like doesn't know what's going on, like how dare you bring you a spinning wheel to my gaming table you asshole? Like, you know what I mean? It's like, no, like that's just that you're passing the time, you've got something to do with your hands, you've got something to focus on and you can participate and you fucking
spinning world is badass. If you're not, if you're listening at home, I should mention there is a spinning wheel. I forgot to say that earlier, that's why I keep talking about spinning wheels. I'm not doing like a weird Rapunzel thing, right? Now that's fine. Sleeping Beauty. Total is wrong. That's wrong, wasn't it? It's fine. It doesn't matter. Moving on. But so that's the thing.
It's like, it's like, there's like the process of like having your system, but then, they're still bringing your system to the table. Whether it's like, I'm going to have a spinning wheel or going to have notes, or I'm going to have my little Dino fidget boy and like bringing that to the table can often times be the hardest part. And that's why Eric, that's why I'm passionate.
In about doing what I do because more often than not, like, I've been the person at the table who's, like, getting made fun of for like, having the spinning wheel, or I'm getting made fun of for like, oh my God, like, can't you pay attention or like why can't you know like oh we're going to go for 12 hours today.
Surprised. And I'm like fuck and so building awareness of like how easy it is to just let somebody have their Spinning Wheel. Let somebody doodle and let somebody have their fidget toys and not make it a thing and not make it a whole process where you have to, like, feel like you have to To justify the existence of your of your, you know, Dino
fidget. Like I think that's really important and that is why like I've started doing this thing because I just I think it's like it's it's it feels easy. It feels easy but it seems so hard and I don't, I don't know why why, when you brought up the doodling thing is I think II hate to use the word trauma. If I'm not certain about it because I don't want to, I don't want to to dilute the term.
But I think a lot of a lot of my own personal hesitancy to, with doing the things that I have to do to pay attention or to remember, or to listen, or whatever it is comes directly from being in school. All of it from preschool, all through high school and having the teacher Go, Eric, Eric, put it in stop, whether I'm doodling, or playing with something, or whatever in front of the whole class and eventually I think, At some point in high school.
I was like, screw 100% of that and I was just like, no, I'm going to keep doing like, look at my test words are like, I'm paying attention, you know. How also, how satisfying was it? I don't, I don't observe any, what a teacher would say like Eric, you know, pay attention? It was like, oh, I am. And they would say the my phone. Yeah, well what did I just say? And then he'll be like, Boo is right back at them and they just like all my teachers were Bulldogs.
Winston Churchill was not very churchillian of you that was not. But I remember this is this is also the case with reading and listening to music and video games and listening to podcast. But I associate the information that's coming in with the thing that I was doing at the time so if I was wrong a specific, you know, robot or something and they say like, Bilateral. Guide Andrew morphic hermaphroditism, or something like that. That's true story. I'll get to it.
You won't. I'll, I'll look, if I come across that robot doodle. Again, I'll medially go back that lateral got into a motor. That's why. That's why I that's the same thing. It's a yeah, I have like a recall button. It's not which was that realization to me was fasting because at first I thought it was like oh this is something that I have to do to just be like to just, you know, get my head above water, right? But no, this is actually a legit
strategy. Like this isn't just how What I need to do to be okay, like, this is actively making me good at studying and how I got through school. And if I listen to a podcast while playing, you know, Red Dead Redemption or something like that. Every time I pass it, this this church all remember, exactly what they were talking about, in the podcast, when I pass that church, there's the TV show Q. I was Stephen Fry. Although, I don't think he has any more highly recommend.
By the way, it's on BBC, they just bring up interesting facts, all the time, and I was playing GTA San Andreas, and I had the flying cars mon on, and I was trying to get to the top of like this tall building in GTA San Andreas. Reyes and Stephen Fry, bought up, the condition of bilateral guy named Andrew morphic hermaphroditism, which is when an animal is split directly down the center, right? And their, their sex, like their, their cellular sex is split like in a line down the sidewalk.
Yeah, frogs chickens and lobsters. It's most common in and I remember hearing this word as I was doing that and then the next day, I was playing GTA again. And I was turning in and it was like bilateral, got injured worker form, a freshman I was 10 years ago. Now, Eric I want a nice Remember the friggin work term. Yeah I'm going to say this and I'm gonna I'm gonna be filled with regret but I want you to know that I've decided that you know how I got you Ruth Goodman for your birthday.
Yeah, IMA get you Steve don't do that. I don't know what I would do. I would freak out hard? I've decided, I don't know, it's not my goal, give me some prep time for us, because I'm gonna know. I got to read everything he's ever written. I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna be like, hey, we have somebody coming on and then it's just going to be surprised Stephen Fry's. Its gonna be like, when Troy me, Eats meat. So. What's the guy's LeVar Burton and Community?
I only wanted a picture. It's once again. Remind you that. Like, if that ever, if you ever like LeVar Burton whirring, that's exactly what will happen. What if, what if, what if we do it on the same day? What if we log into the zoom call? And they're two extra boxes and Hasty Friday LeVar Burton. And Stephen Fry have a conversation on infant Quest and we're not there. Giggles, you guys we're kind of busy you guys. Mind, got our friends. Just I don't, what's your name again?
Stephen, Stephen and we've are going to be, so I was thinking about it and I was thinking that we have this whole room of people. Yeah, that I'm very pointedly not looking at because I'm so nervous. So if any like should we do like questions, what? Should we do? I'm down to do questions. I'm I'm still in this phase of doing the pockets were like, why the hell would people want to ask me questions to do just some dude? Like what I'm trying to get over
that it hand, instantly went. Oh, there you go. So okay, you got like be loud though, because we are lazy and we only set up on Mike's. Yeah. Hi crystals. That form a crystal. So I've been writing notes while you've been through this. Give yourself permission to Holy, be yourself and take up space. That nothing is wrong with you and you deserve to participate and be accepted. That is the whole idea. Like I love that question.
I love that question because that is that is absolutely what I mean especially I think with ADHD and D like yeah, that's what we're trying to do. Here's a secret announcement. I don't know if we I don't know if we told people this yet, I know you're talking we're going to be but we're like after. Play on con. We're going to be going to Gen Con and we're going to be, I know.
Yeah. And we're going to be actually teaching a workshop about accessibility in gaming and talking to like new game designers and talking about how to like bring in like different neuro types and like make your instructions accessible because there's nothing worse. I can't do. Then an instruction manual. Oh my God. That just dislike just words. You're just like, why are you do you hate us? How is the amount of times? I've been trying to get in on a game in the DM will just hand me.
The player's handbook and just go read this or like know, I'm sorry. I'm gonna what I'm gonna look at a 40 minute YouTube video. Crank It Up to 2x speed and watch though. That's yeah, perfect. And, and so, yeah, so I mean, like I, that's ever since all of this started that is, I think, for, I don't want to speak for Eric, but like that has been thing that we keep coming back to, is that the like I always thought, like, I always thought that I had to be this, like, version of myself.
Like, I had to be this like, perfect Kate. I had to be this like person who like had their shit. Together and like knew what was going on in whatever. But then, once I started talking about the difficulties, once I started being honest about the fact that like, I, it fucking sucks to not be able to play D and E for three hours. But like, I can't. And the more I started talking about that. The more like heads would start nodding and art digital audience if you will.
And so like, that's, I think kind of how we ended up here doing this is my like again, I don't talk for you, but like, that's what I wanted to do is That and I'm learning every day that like it's okay to not be able to play DOD for 3 hours. Like it's not a moral failing there, isn't anything inherently wrong with me. Just, that's how my brain works.
And so if your brain says, sorry you don't get 7 h d-- u d-- sessions cool like go find people who appreciate one-hour sessions and play with them you know like yeah that's a great question. Yeah, really I think one of the the things that I was really surprised most about when we started doing this was a lot of We would Katie and I would do an episode about something and we would immediately afterwards got that was fucking garbage. That was the worst thing we've
ever made. How dare we show this to people but you know it's our job and so we're like okay and we put it out and I'm always shocked this happens every time we'll get messages or emails from people saying it's just nice to hear people talk like we do and that fucking gets me. Fuck me happy because I my whole life I Especially in school, my whole life. I was told like you're great. If only if you could just be, you'd be amazing, such a good student, you're so smart. But yeah.
And that was my fucking fault and it took really until I met you. I think that I realized that not only is this not a moral failing or my fault who Writing these rules where I'm not allowed to be this way. Like who said, who says, that I can't do, who says, I can't stutter and change my train of thought four times. Perhaps, that's not the best way to be as if you're a podcaster.
Apparently it's okay. Perhaps if certain professions that doesn't lend itself well to but I don't give it I'm not a doctor or a podcast host or anything. I'm Eric, God damn it. And that's how I'm going to be and that's okay. And the question I guess to bring it To gaming. Does I play games in a certain
way? And I love games first for certain reasons and I try to find people that are accommodating to those ways and appreciate games for the same reasons that I do. And I've met people who have like changed my life profoundly for the better by deciding. Like, I'm going to be accommodating and respectful to others, but I'm also going to be myself, you know, I'm going to try not to hurt the pain people, of course, but I'm also going to be myself, or am I going to apologize for?
That's not to say that? I don't, that's, that's something that I aspire to, but, you know, I don't know. Another question, I have a point and a question. I'm not sure. Your bike is picking up and you've got to be meters off, and this is too long. Let me know. Fine, please, bye. I was diagnosed at 52 and live my whole freakin life with my ADHD. Not being recognized as anything
other than a than a failure. Yeah, yeah, I was right, you know, I went to school in the 70s and 80s and even though they knew what hyperactivity was they didn't. First and anything about, you know, like and I and then like, even when I started working, I would negotiate with my employers. I'm like, look, I'm going to be late, I'll do other people's side, do whatever it takes for you to forgive me being late. What can I do to compensate like
it? And I would sit there and negotiate how, and I self-diagnosed in ways that so don't ever like, I absolutely I'm in the big sad right now in my life because I'm having to look back over my history and go, if only people knew then what they know now, yeah, my life would have been infinitely better and you're growing up in a very, very better world than I did. I am so happy for you to thank you.
I mean it's that's when you said if we knew then what we know now I think that's we don't have like a mission statement, I think on our website or something like that, but I think our mission statement is like we want it to say the things that We wish somebody can said to us, when we were younger. Yeah. Like I think Katie I'm sorry, we just want like a really long time, writing a mission statement, and its really good. And we definitely have it was really funny. Go past Eric, and Katie.
I was able to hyper fixate on games. Hmm. And then why when you know was my ADHD started getting me distracted I would do things like go attack the snacks or not you know or do or I go into the book and start reading the rules to try to and like I read three books a week in high school during school. Hmm. You know what kind of things do you hyper fixate on that. Allow you to like enjoy the things you enjoy. You know, that's I've been what? What what what month is it changes?
I mean, I've done papermaking bookbinding palindrome writing. That's that's more of a long. Two pounds. Room writing is really fun. I make models out of coffee. Stirrers! I? What else? Oh, I like making wire sculptures, but none of those things alone. It's always something else, too. I'm always doing those things. While a podcast or a movie or documentary, or whatever is playing. So for me, personally, it's a lot. I like ending up with a physical product at the end of what I'm doing.
I like having a thing that I mean ever since I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do is to make a thing and go look at this thing. Like, hey, tell me, I'm smart and cool, you know, whatever. So for me, it's a lot of making stuff. It's a lot of making stuff and I get those. Jimmy's also somewhat for making like digital stuff editing, whatever building stuff in Minecraft, 3D modeling, whatever it is. But for me, it's a lot of physical things.
So I think somewhere deep down, I just, this is a whole different story, but just to just to just because it's really contextualizes who I am there is this gifted program in my elementary school called academically talented and I didn't get into it and for a bunch of reasons I won't get into, that was a massive deal to me. And so, from that point on, I just want people to tell me, I'm smart. Like, that's all I want.
And so, but not in the conventional way because they told me I couldn't do that because I'm not a conventional guy. They like, I'm not going to be the guy. Who gets the homework in early. I'm never going to be that guy, but I can be the guy who sits in a room with a bunch of coffee, stirrers and comes out with a boat five hours later, I can be that guy.
So I'm going to be really good at being that guy and the feeling that I get when I show somebody something and and a lot of some of it selfish because I want them to think I'm smart but also the look on their face when they go fuck like I didn't know you could do that with like in making their day a little better or a little more Vivid because of something I did. It's like I mean it's this is a little trite but it's not.
It's an honor. And I think what we're doing is is perhaps in some ways, an extension of that, I think. There is a question in the back. It was a long time. I was diagnosed with very young age very very supportive parents was medicated large part of my life and those teen years and
started. No. And then remember, specific specific moms were pretty much my life turnarounds, because I got back on litigation, figure it out that I didn't tell anybody took it and also I'm certain that this complements that doing so much better. You're paying attention about. How do you guys feel about medication helping with any kind of today?
Yeah I mean I always say this like medication is a tool, it's not a cure-all, it's not like a magical, fairy comes down and like your problems are so limited.
It's a tool. And for for some people it is a very very effective tool for Me like the story I always tell is I was I was diagnosed the day before my 30th birthday and on my 30th birthday I went and I got my prescription and I took it and 20 minutes later my life changed and I went oh that's what this could be like and and then dealing with like that whole Fallout of like what could have been in the resentment in the anger and the frustration and all of that aside, you know
but we have people ask us everyday. Like should I take medication or like Medication a bad thing or is going to turn me into a speed fiend and it's like, no, but it's a tool and it's a tool that is absolutely right for some people and for some people, like, it's all they need and for other people. It's in conversation with, you know, like therapy or life skills or coaching, or that kind of thing. But it's also not
one-size-fits-all. And, and one thing that I'm, and I don't mind sharing about it, but I like, I don't take medication on the weekends. And because that is just what works for me and works for my life and works for my brain. And a lot of people will. What do you mean? You don't take your medication all the time? And I'm like, well, yeah, because like, that's how it works for me and so, so yeah. I mean, my answer is always the same. It's, it's a tool if that tool
is right for you. Cool, you know, don't go steal your little brothers prescription and like try it out. And go don't do that but like supervise and you know, used appropriately, like it is a exceptionally powerful tool for a lot of People, but if you're able to manage without it, that's fine too. Yeah. I talk about medication, not as a medical professional is kind of a dangerous game, but one thing that I will say outright, is that taking medication is something that needs to be taken.
Seriously, it is not a light, especially ADHD medications because they're a bunch of different types of work in a bunch of different ways. It should be something that takes is, is taken very seriously. And I advocate for when you start taking medication, In to have auxiliary support systems. Now, when say auxiliary cousin plays with their extra, but having support systems around you because something that I, we hear this a lot, I certainly
experienced this. I think you certainly experienced this, there's a period of mourning that happens when you take medication medication for the first time.
Especially if you take it later in life because you're like, holy shit, all the Wasted Years spoiler alert, you didn't waste them, they happened in, you became the person that you are in your great, but that is the feeling that It's I remember the first time I took it easy medication was November 9th 2009. I remember the day all of it because that was the first day that I got to like the things that I liked. I got to sit in class and go fuck. This is interesting.
I'm going to read about it. This is I want to draw this drawing. I'm going to draw it. And that is, I mean, to the, the shock, wave from that, I still feel every day. When I take my medication, I just go God, I remember what it was like before this, and yeah. And I also, you know, like all tools tools can create be immensely useful, and wonderful, and they can create amazing things. They can also really hurt you really badly. And so again, whatever.
Some people are going to take medication. That's fine. Some people do take medication and Great. That's also fine but it's something that needs to be taken very seriously. And I also recommend taking a lot of notes while you're taking them and if you're not very good at taking notes, while you're having them, then they might not be working very well. It's kind of funny but it's true.
I mean, when I was at were first taken, I was taking notes, like, I noticed I would stop taking notes at a certain point of time of the day so I was like, oh they're wearing off at that point of the day because I fuck off from the notes. You know, I was my first F-bomb in this whole episode. I was gonna see if I can do it. Clean, what you gonna do? As I've I blew that for you like hours ago. I thought I saw another hand, but maybe.
Yeah, okay. So one of the things that I had to learn was that when talking about tools, the things that make tools useful, is they help you fit into the environment, you're in and our world is not built generally. Speaking for people with neurodivergent, yeah, like it's not built for people with various disabilities but Ways have you guys found to make your world your environment more accommodating for you? What what are some of the things that you have said? I'm not doing that anymore.
I'm going to do this differently. I put a face on a tablecloth. No, I mean that's a great question because I think oh man. I probably have an answer, hold on. Sure. You just I'm trying to decide you want me to go while you think of it or do you want a diamond either? One you go. You go. I'm gonna tear into the middle distance for a second. Sure. Well, I think we'll just to list off like a couple like immediate practical things when it comes
to storing things. For example, I do like modeling and so so much of tools. Keep them visible drawers. Can go f themselves. Yeah. Keep them visible. Like pal, use a pegboard. So having the whole wall up there, because Something. That is very common with ADHD is people often say people with ADHD struggle with object permanence but it's not challenge. Yes challenge. Yeah, I love you, I support you huh?
It's not the question you are talking about a system and our good friend Celestine is talking about ways that you have said instead of do almost anything Chanel. Yeah. Oh I don't know. I don't fold my laundry or my socks or my laundry anymore. Who said, who said I divide them but I don't fold them who says, um, I think something that's important is one's kind of ties into the medication. Question is we don't live in a world that was built for people with ADHD, or for people with
other version sees. It was built for people without those things. And so for a lot of people, one of the reasons they don't take medication is because for their line of work, or for the way that their life is their ABCs just fine. My dad is an example of those people here was a journalist and so he had to be able to switch from task to task and all that stuff. But some for some people, the things that they aspire to do are not do not lend themselves very well.
ADHD and what they have to not because anybody said they should because you know who they are, they want to be able to do this thing and I think. So when it comes to the world not being designed for people that HD I've oh my God, I lost it. I'm so sorry. That was such a shitty answer that question. I had like a whole thing and then I can you did you get to do it? Your thing, I did you go, please, please save me. It's I put my I put my underwear
and bins. I know that's dumb but it changed my life because because here's the thing, it's like my underwear. A symbolic don't don't because because that's the thing is like and it kind of ties back to your question as well because I spent so long just being like, there's something inherently wrong with me. There's something intrinsically wrong with me. Like, I'm a bad person because I can't use drawers, I can't fold
my laundry whatever. And then, the more I started like looking at my life and the more I started like looking at these places where I was like spending So much time, so much energy and so much just just effort just effort to like fucking match my socks. Like why why? Who cares? And one of the things that I started doing was instead of like putting shit away in the drawer, I just have pins and I go underwear. Haha binge, take that and people go.
Oh my God, like that. What are you what are you doing? What are you doing? But that led to then? Okay, well if I'm doing that that I don't have to match my socks and if I don't have To match my socks. Then maybe like all of my laundry can go in bins or like in a system that makes sense to me.
And if that's the case, well then maybe like my, you know, like my silverware drawer can be a certain way and if that's the case, then maybe like my whole kitchen, can be a certain way and if my whole kitchen to me a certain way, maybe my house can be covered in Star Wars shit and Muppets and no one is.
I'm an adult, I pay my taxes. You know, like that's fine and then maybe just maybe if I do that, there are other people in the world who I need to know that it's okay to put your underwear in a bin and so I started making tick-tocks and now I'm here. So somewhere along the line I learned something. I'm just not sure what it is and kind of along the lines with hers. It was about systems, which we kind of already talked about.
But another point is learning to be comfortable in your own skin. Yeah. And when that happened for you, I'm in a world that allows A certain amount of eccentricity air quotes is tolerated for results and in. So, yeah, you might have people who, you know, they don't work normal 9 to 5 even though it's 95 office, because they produce results and they don't care. But a lot of us, especially in
the world. I work in had to learn how to become comfortable in your own skin and head have systems or things, you know. So, What are some of the biggest you guys have a story or? How did you guys become comfortable off your own skin? To start a podcast to put your face on the tablecloth? I mean, like I can I answer this one? Well, mine is pretty short.
I'm not. Yeah, I was in the say I'm I mean I was going to say the exact same thing like I I've never once been comfortable in my own skin, like I like and I realize it's maybe like a really weird way of approaching it. It like I realized that like I at some point this started happening like all of this started happening and people, how do I, how do I, how do I say this?
Like I realized that like maybe not being comfortable in my own skin was just, as okay as being because I because because if the goal, if the goal is Is being completely and perfectly comfortable in my own skin, all the time. That's never going to happen because I have ADHD and I have depression and there are days, I don't want to bring the room down but like there are days when I look in the mirror and
I'm like, you should be dead. Like, you don't deserve to be here and that's not a comfortable feeling and that's not a fun feeling. And so what I realized was like, rather than trying to like go for this, like idealized version of self-acceptance, where one day I A cup like wake up and I got my hair looks amazing and I'm beautiful. And I don't notice that my arms go like this, when I flapping around like I just said, fuck it. Fuck it. Like I have something to say and
I feel like I should rephrase. Yeah, no. It's okay. When did, when did you guys figure out that it was okay to be uncomfortable? We've been being quite okay. Okay. On your own skin. I mean that You're okay with the fact that you're walking around in a certain level of discomfort in a room full of people who look like they're completely comfortable compared to like how you feel. Mmm, is that the better? You know, that's a good question. I think. I still know my answer. Yeah, I think.
Well, I'll try to be brief. I think you got something that I try to like, say to myself. A lot is says who you're supposed to sort your silverware and spoons and forks. Tonight says who why can't I just put them in the drawer? Altogether says, who I just want to match your socks as who you're supposed to be 100% comfortable in your skin at all times says who where did that come from? Why did we have this idea that that's the case.
And I think we'll part of, I think a lot in try to talk a lot about masculinity, because I'm a man person and it's there's a lot of well it's worth. It's necessary to talk about it. But I, when I was about 18 years old, it was a girl that I like she worked in the store next to me. And the co-workers that I worked with notice that I liked her and they kept begging me to let. Go ask her out. Go ask her, I'll go ask her out. And I kept saying, like, she
doesn't want me to ask her out. I don't want to ask her out. I just have a crush. That's what I was thinking but that's not what I was supposed to do. I was an 18 year old boy man, whatever you want to think of it as and we're supposed to we're not spoil alert, do stuff like that and so I did and she said no and that was the end of it but I remember thinking I didn't want to ask her. I liked having a crushing. Why is that not? Okay. Why is their version of what?
I'm supposed to do? The right version and mine, is it? And from, then on, I attempted to, I always Say that I'm attempting to oh I didn't feel like I've arrived anywhere but I started realizing that there is no correct version of things I think to borrow something Stephen Fry said to yeah to fuck me.
What do they call back? He said I think we all sort of feel like before we were born there was a class in which how to live, and how to be a person was taught, but we slept in that day, he didn't go. Everybody else went to that class. We Didn't there was no fucking class. There was no, nobody knows what we're doing. We're all just trying to make our lives something worth doing and that can look like a literally infinite amount of things.
And so I don't feel like I'm a million percent comfortable in my own skin. I hope I'm more comfortable in my own skin than I was a month ago or a year ago.
But I think the question for me is always do I accept this or do I change it and when it comes to who I am, Perhaps, I could change it, but I don't care to, you know, I want to be a better person in a kind person and a nice person when it comes to the way that, you know, my brain works of the things that I like to do with a hobbies that I have. Who says, who says, I have to be some other way. Why can't I just be this way? No, no.
That I like looking at you. Do you approve of it's much less serious and and nice than Eric's but I was a theater major in college and all I wanted to do from the time that I was very small to the time I was in college was I wanted to do theater and I wanted specifically to do musicals, I wanted to do musical theaters, but at the time I was a much.
Your person. And I went to one of those cool College Programs, where if you were a larger bodied person, you were, never going to get to play the aunjanue. You were never going to get to play the thing. And so, that taught me very quickly. Like they were some, that was, there was something inherently wrong with me. There is something inherently wrong with like, the physical space that I inhabited. And the body that I inhabited because I was never going to get
to be the lead. I was, I could be the funny neighbor. I could be, you know, could be the evil stepsister, but like you couldn't Fat people don't fall in love, it's not real. And so I in college that was when I learned like, okay, well, if that's the case, then I have to, I have to make do right? Which is very unhealthy.
Like I don't, I'm not pretending like, that's not, but then after college, I started doing Shakespeare and the company that I worked for the one of the first shows that I ever saw it was it was a production of Much Ado. Got nothing and the woman playing Beatrice and the guy playing Benedict were both larger body people.
They're both very big people and they were older, they were in their 40s and I remember going to see the show and I remember thinking she looks like me. She looks like me in a way that I've never seen anybody look at the for and I started like working with this company and what I realized and this it sounds, it's really trite. But basically what happened was is that I realized that it wasn't About how I looked or being comfortable. It was about what I did out.
What I did outwardly that was going to like make the difference because I could constantly apologize. It could constantly be like. I'm so sorry for the space that I'm taking up. But instead I said, you know what, I'm fucking great at Shakespeare and I deserve I deserve to play Beatrice, I deserve to placate, I deserve to play Lady Macbeth, and I have professionally over and over and over and over and over again because like that, that is What I was bringing to the table and like that.
Those were the stories that I wanted to tell. And so, somewhere in there, I was like, it doesn't matter that like internally, I think I'm always just like, are they gonna notice? Are they going to notice that I have a twitch in. My hair is poofy. Like, yeah, you probably all have, but like I really truly believe that like the stories that we tell and the words that we use, like they have worth, and they have meaning, and they
have power. And if I can sit behind this table, So with my poofy hair and my tick and you know, my flabby arms and go, you know what like everybody deserves love and everybody really matters, I don't know. I think that is cool. Hmm, thank you so much for being here. I broke my dinosaur. You can we have, you didn't break your dinosaur, you just made more fidget. I just I I was so scared. This is what I was doing or to the table the whole time.
So now that that's that's quality who everybody wants, buyer March. But thank you so much for being here. This is the first episode of our second season. I just moved across the country to do this. So, thank you so much for being here on the first of this whole thing. I don't know, just it really means a lot. Thank you so much and we'll see you tomorrow. And that's it. That's the end of this week's episode and the very beginning of season two.
Oh, yeah. I feel like the sun is rising on a brand new day in their Birds. Going tweedily dee deep, would, you know, Eric that there's also music. There's music in the air. Yeah, the hills are alive, it's terrifying. But with the sound of music, the problem being in the same room with you, you're just gonna keep doing dumb stuff on it hurt. The patreon song so much better. Patreon song quality upgrade this week.
We have a whole bunch of people to thank because we forgot for like three weeks while we were moving. Yes, we did. We forgot. To do the patreons you song, did you learn in and marlina and Nicola, and Jennifer and Megan, and Bobby. We couldn't have done it without you. Eric you wanted to sing. I did, I did, I did, and thank you, Nicole, and Kaitlyn, and Leah, and Lucas, and Lucas.
Was just one little kiss, but I needed one more name to sing in that measure, but I wanted to leave enough names for Katie to sing. Thank you. Ali had Nicole by the different Nicole, and Jennifer and Kaitlyn, and Cinco. Who is a Buckaroo buddy. I don't know why that matters. He's about Guru, but he's a boy. Buckaroo, buddy. He's a Buckaroo buddy. Had, if I go buddy, all you gotta do is go to patreon.com/scishow. Infinite Quest Shiva. Wait, give me a bigamy. A big G. Ready. Ready?
Ready. That's pretty good hours of rehearsal that we put. Yeah. Or they really showed I feel like Buddy, it is gonna get bigger, it is going to get better. It is gonna get weirder. It is gonna get just so much more. So from all of us here at infinite Quest. Thank you so much for your support. We are so excited for season 2 so yeah, we'll see you next week. So drink your water. Take your meds. Nailed it. It was dramatic pause. I was being all. Dramatic wasn't one of these.
Once again, has a neck, be kind to yourself. We love you. You forgot to say, be kind of their, she kind of others and for all of us should have been a quest. We love you. We're gonna get it Eric, see if season 2 now with 50% more blumpkin