I Just Need A Hug

is actually good. Also, I just want to throw in there, I don't mind, I don't mind reading, Okay, I just need for y'all to come punctual study literacy. I mean, I know a lot of y'all ain't been in school for a long time. I've been out of school since twenty ten. But it helps me get through your story

much better. It helps me. It helps me. That's why I haven't read a lot of stories that's being sent to me, because I can't make sense of all the run on sentences and how y'all misspelling stuff and all that. I'm not saying nobody is uneducated. I'm just saying y'all be rushing and shit, then y'all talk with slang and all that. I don't know how to decipher what y'all be talking about because a lot of y'all are not from Baltimore, So if it ain't Baltimore lingo, I don't

understand it, y'all. However, I do love you guys. And then also I see a lot of people have been getting confused on where to send audio because I haven't made the announcement in a while. Yes, you have to send your voice memos to the Carefully Reckless podcast page, not just Hilarious official not Reckless Discussions, because this is

not either of those, and not co Parenting Therapy. I notice a lot of you guys send voice notes to co Parenting that's for Rome and I. That's not for a carefully reckless that doesn't cater to carefully Reckless unless you want it to be read on the Carefully Reckless podcast.

But I'm under the impression when you guys send voice notes to co Parenting Therapy page that you guys want Rome and I to help you with something which we will be launching, relaunching another season where we actually sit down with people and talk with them and try to sort out their differences for cool parents and Okay, then let's jump straight on.

want somebody, and it's hard not having anybody. So I guess I don't even know if I'm asking a questions or if I'm just vincent, because I don't. It's hard trying to tell people that because when people will see you with five kids.

and it will be okay. It's hard sometimes I feel myself being a horrible parent because I can't poor love in my kids because I have none to poor man If you love me. You'll listen to this commercial and then we'll be right back. Well, listen, I'm going to start off by saying, I love that you are open enough to go into every part of it, you know, with me, because you could have very well, you know, held back. But as a result of holding back, people

get depressed. People often turn to drugs and suicide and other things like that. What you've gone through is definitely traumatic, especially for your baby.

he went to jail for domestic violence? And I'm going to assume that it was, you know, a case with you. He went to jail for hitting on you, beating on you, of course the first time. Why didn't you go the first time?

You know you met him when you were twelve. Then you're not even telling me how old he is, and if you did, I'm sorry I didn't catch that. So I'm imagining that he's much older than you because he prayed on you. You know, a lot of men pray on younger women, and a lot of older women pray on younger men. It's the same, you know, vice versa, and either are right. It doesn't make it better because it's a woman. It's not right. If a man can't do it, a woman should not either, you know. So, yeah,

he went to jail. You met him when you were twelve, Your parents kicked you out, You went to live with him a long way from home. Obviously, because you said that you were in a town where you didn't even know anybody. He went to jail for for beating you, you know, for putting his hands on you, domestic violence. You were pregnant, you had the first baby. Obviously, you're not gonna tell me that he ever stopped putting his hands on you. He never stopped putting his hands on you,

even when he came on from jail. He didn't you mean to tell me, As young as you were, you didn't realize that that was not a situation that a young woman should have to endure. Do you really mean to tell me that, you know? Because I feel you, baby, I feel your empathy. I do, I do, and I sympathize with you for your child, mostly because he molested his own daughter. Okay, so he belongs six feet fucking under, and I am very sorry to say that he deserved

the fucking electric chair. He deserves to go to jail, never come out. He deserves everything negative in life. He does not deserve to prosper at all. I don't care. I don't give a fuck what people say. People change, People change. You molested your child. You sent his children with him because you did point out that he was a great dad. He showed you that he was a ain't shit man, but that never stopped him from being

a good dad. And then you go on to tell me that your daughter went with him for a summer along with the other four kids that you two have together, and your daughter came back and you noticed that she was different, she was very different. That's sad, that's very very sad. And then later you found out that she

was molested. Of course you didn't see this coming. No mother in her right mind would send their child with a man, even with it being her biological father, if they had any inkling that he would touch her inappropriately in that way. What did you do for her? That's what I want to know when you found out, because you said you'd like to keep this a secret. That's

the problem in these black families as well. I can't speak for any other race because I am not any other race, but a problem in black households is we sweep shit under the rug and we keep going as if shit never fucking happened. Like you hear these stories about, you know, a child being ripped by our uncles for years and years, and the found out and just cut the unc just cut her brother off. She just cut the uncle off. She didn't take any type of legal action,

and they just swept in under the rug. And then you grow up. Then the child grows up all promiscuous and shit or thinking that this is regular because there was never any action taken against her uncle. You know what I'm saying, What did you do? Did you call the police? Did you get them locked up? What did you do? And then what did you do for her? You know, what did you do to really set an example to say this is not right? This is my baby, this is your child. You raped her. You gotta pay

for this shit. You understand what legal action was taking? And then also did you get her therapy? Do you talk to her? Is she allowed to open up about it around you? Because if you like to keep her a secret, I know, damn well, she ain't supposed to be saying nothing about it, you know? Is that how you raised her after that? Like, look, we don't talk

about this because that's wrong. You know, she may have issues for the rest of her life because of this, you know, and listen, I understand, you want love, you want friends. It's very hard being lonely, but with five children.

be in love. You want to get married, you want to, but that's gonna take a lot of work, honey, because there's been a lot of traumatic moments that led up to you being damaged. You are damaged, Your daughter is damaged, and I don't know about the rest of your four beautiful children. But who's to say that he didn't do that in front of them? Who's to say that you know?

We just don't know, okay, Because if you molest one child, and you treat one child like shit, or you put your hands on one child, the rest of them aren't exempt. You just have to assume that he's a danger to all of them. All of them are in danger around the fuck father. You understand what I'm saying, how is the relationship between you and your kids? You said, sometimes you feel like a horrible parent. Do you look at them and see him? Do you see them as a

product of him? And you know and you get disgusted with them? You know, because you need therapy. You need to heal tremendously before you make a decision to date somebody. Baby, This is not just gonna be a I date now all my problems are gone away. No, you have to connect with your children. Connect with them. Let them know what their father is. You need to let them know why you left their dad. You need to explain to them everything that you explained to me, because that's all

you got is your children. They ain't gonna never leave you. They'll never telling you, They'll never leave you. Hold up, hold up, I know this shit getting good, But listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen. Are you religious? Do you have do you pray? You know? Do you meditate? Do yoga? What do you do? You know? What are you doing for job? What do you do in your free time? You know? Do you not have one homegirl? Are you

close with your parents? Have you and your mom or dad, you know, reconvened. Since you left this man, you know, does he still contact you? I need to know. I need to know these things so I can tell you or advise you on how to move with your social life. But first you need to sit down and see somebody professionally. You and your babies. You need to do individual therapy, but you need a family therapist as well. That's what y'all need in that house. I don't care if you

don't think it's it's not gonna work. It works. Therapy works and it helps people. It does help. We are living in the times right now. Mental health is trending. People want to fix themselves. We didn't even know we had help for mental health until just recently, but now we do. We have all types of resources that can help you. I feel so bad for you and your babies. Yes I do, And it's the holidays now as well. Hold your baby tight, love on them. They are all

you have. They are all you have. It still could be worse because you could not have them. You could have lost them, CPS could have took them right the fuck up out of there. You understand, you got your babies, all five of them, all of them teenagers all the way down to six to a six year old. Take your babies, love on them. They're going to be your strength, and you on return have to be theirs because they are still the children they didn't next to be here.

You gotta put that big mommy head on, and you put your big girl panties on, and you got to pray. You know, I'm not trying to force a religion on you. I am a Christian woman, god fearing woman.

she's doing both. She's venting while still in a place where she doesn't know what to do. She feels lonely, you know, and she doesn't think a man is going to want her after having five kids. Let me tell you something, babe, it could be way worse for you in that dating pool with your kids. You could have

five different baby daddies. No shame to nobody else who does you know, But I'm saying it could be that thing, because then a man, a man will look at a woman and say, damn, you got five kids by five different niggas. Oh nah, I ain't fucking with this bit, you know what I'm saying. It goes the same way. My son's dad got five kids. It's certain women that will not mess with him because all five of his children don't belong to one woman. They belong to five

different women, you know, myself included. So it's like it would be his preference. If you do reveal that you got five kids, it'd be like, nah, but you know, all five of your children were produced early by one man. It doesn't make it better all around the board, per se, but it makes it better. All of your children. They you know, they have to left the same last name, the same dad.

You need a hug. You go hug them babies until you meet someone that will give you a genuine hug and that will will love you for you and love your babies as well. But I think you should go get your daughter some help, and I think you should get help as well. Don't make nothing a fucking secret because this shit is happening every day somewhere. So you're not the only person who went through this shit. Your baby is not the only person who was molested by

her father. And then, obviously with her being so young, what made her not tell you is he probably scared her into not telling you. You understand what I'm saying. Just think about every night she wanted to run away, or she wanted to come the fuck home, she wanted to call the police, she wanted to kill her father. She don't understand why her Why are you doing this

to me. Think of her, Think of how she was feeling the same way you were feeling when he was beating on your ass before you had four more children. Do you feel me. I'm not here to coddle you. I'm here to tell you you're stronger. You are a strong woman because you ain't on drugs, not that I know of it, but I'm gonna go ahead and say you ain't on no drugs. You are strong. You didn't give those children away. You did not give them, you know, put them in foster care. You could have gave them

up for adoption. You are strong and that's how I know that you are strong enough. You're strong enough to not give up right now because you want a man, you know, you want to marry somebody with a big family. All that shit will come. You have to get yourself together, you know, and your baby. So just check back in with me, because I really want to follow up with you. Oh my god, but we've come to the end of this episode because I don't even have time to read

another story. We've come to yet the conclusion of another episode of Carefully Reckless with your CIRL dressing. Hmm, my bad, y'all. I was eating a sandwich. The rest of my other half of my sandwich got cold, and shit, this story was so damn good. I'm like, damn man. I mean not good in a sense where it's like it's entertainment. I mean like this is some real life shit and I had to delve into it. I had to stop

biting all my saying. I got a bacon, egg and cheese on white toast with butter and jelly mm, and that was cold. You don't want to put no no breakfast sandwich in a microwave. So you know I love you, girl. You know I love you, And that's why I want you to update me on everything you've got going on from here on out, you know. And it doesn't have to be an update for Carefully Reckless. You can just update me anyway personally. You know what I'm san hand.

And if you don't want, you don't want the updates to be on the podcast, they don't have to be. I just want to make sure you're okay, all right, And that is the end, you guys. I'll see you next week. Peace Can't Fully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.