Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of Our Heart Radio and the Black Effect. Then asked back there, asked back there, oh ship, and just like that, we're back on the air. Welcome back to another episode of Carefully Recklessness. This episode ten, y'all, I'm loving this ship. Help me celebrate. Look story time. Alright, So my cousin Pie, all right, she was dating the god Dawn. Now we all loved Dawn. She was dating him a couple of years ago. Everything was good with them.
She had a good job, he had a good job. They moved together, they were living together, no kids, she never got pregnant or whatever. But my cousin has always wanted to get married. I'm talking about always. She's never cared to who or whatever. She is just all about getting married. She wants that fairy tale ending whatever whatever right to years went by. Don hasn't proposed, but they are still together. He seems happy. She's happy too. So me and my family is like to get together and
we like to do ship. So we had bowling one night, just the girls, she tells me and our other cousins. But she got until December to put a ring on my finger. So I'm like, fee what. She's like, Yeah, I've been with this nigga too long for him to have not proposed yet. I'm like two years. She's like, yeah, I feel like I've been with him too long not to be married, or him to even have popped the question or even to have thought about it yet. I say, if you ever talked to him about it? She's like,
all the time, that's all I talk about. So I was like, Okay, you don't think you maybe pushing him away? She like, bitch, I've been waiting for two years. Everything is good. I got good pussy, I can cook, I claim I do everything. I'm already like a wife. Only thing he gotta do is make me one. I said, well, ship, now listen. She had a mindset on that ship. Like I told y'all, she's always wanted to be married. Didn't matter what he wanted. So December comes, he does not propose.
She leaves him. She left this nigga sad as fuck, y'all, because he loved her. She loved him, He was in love with her. He loved fee man. I still keep in touch with Dawn. He cool at ship. In my opinion, he was the best guy for my cousin, so she leaves him, she gets with somebody else. He eventually gets with somebody else. He married the girl that he started dating after my cousin only after a year of dating.
He put a ring on somebody else's finger after only dating her for a year, And my cousin meanwhile still to this day, to this day, it's stuck dating niggas, pressuring niggas to marry her. Now, look, that's the end of that story, which brings me to the carefully reckless discussion. Now, the fact that Dawn married somebody else only a year after dating her. To me, I didn't feel it was wrong. When my cousin found out, she damn it killed hers. So she was fucked up, stressed out, and she was
with somebody else. Mind you a clown, asked nigga, if you will, But that's the whole point about it. She pressured him. When I asked, I said, if you talked to him about it, yeah, I thought I talked about Now. If y'all know my cousin and a lot of y'all who are listening, if y'all know me personally, y'all know Fee Fee is very impulsive. Fee will keep talking about some ship for days and days and days like yo, she'll never leave it alone. The nigga got tired of
hand that ship. Let him do that. Also, Fie is very controlling, not even only with the proposal ship, with everything. She wanted everything her way I'm talking about. She wanted the nigga to eat a certain way, sleep a certain way, walk a certain way, dress a certain way. She was very controlling, but she knew she wanted to get married. Now I've talked to Don. I asked on damn, yo, you're married shortly after one year? He said, Yo, it just happened organically, like I fell in love with her.
I knew I wanted to marry her six months in. I got my money together for the wedding and everything, as I wanted a quick turnaround time. I didn't want to propose to her and we'd be engaged for years and years and years. Now Black people they got the motherfucking had it, are doing that. My brother proposed to his baby mother like five six years ago and they
still ain't married and he ain't gonna marya. He just did that to show her to funk up, because she wanted to be a wife and she's still not a wife, she's just an engage. But he fell in love with this girl. Now her name is Stephanie. I like her, and my cousin doesn't like me anymore because I went to their wedding fuked up. But that's on youth. He let the girl love him, the girl let him love her, and it just happened. She made him want to marry her. He didn't make him want to marry her, and he
stayed with her for two years. But he did love her, and now he did. But he told me she was very controlling. He said, the straw that broke the camel's back for me was when she came into the room one night and was like, you got until Christmas to put a ring on my finger, nigga. He said, that's when he knew he definitely wasn't marrying her. Then he just didn't tell her no. Look, in my opinion, people get married for all the wrong reasons. My cousin wanted
to get married for all the wrong reasons. She just wanted to be able to say she was somebody's wife. She wanted the fairytale wedding. A lot of people do that, but it's a lot that goes into marriage man. And and that's fine. If you want to be a wife, that's cool. It's tradition. It's sort of fairytalers, you know what I mean. That's the way of life, that's the way it's supposed to be. But you don't want to get married just to get the voice. It's a lot of money and a lot of time and effort that
goes into that ship. I think you should get to know the person that you want to marry. I'm talking about knowing them inside and out. I think the only way that you should be able to get married is if you are able to say that's my best friend. You gotta build that foundation. You gotta know that person inside and out. I'm talking about little ship from little ship to big ship, because the little ship is what
mad is the most. If I'm walking around with an attitude but I don't say it, you already supposed to know why I got an attitude and what the funk are mad about? Why? Because you know me inside and out. Now, the most complicated thing in this world to figure out is a woman's mind. But the second most complicated thing to figure out in this world is a man's mind. But it's only two of us, a woman and a man,
and shift. If you're gonna jump that boom, you gotta be willing to do all the ship that helps you get there. Get to know your partner before you make them your spouse, because the last thing you want to do is get married and then find out some ship that you didn't know about the motherfucker after you marry them. You don't want to do that. Honestly, I don't think two years is long enough to be given a nigga an ultimatum. I don't think so. I think maybe three
or four years tops. A lot of women know what they want before men, Okay, and and that's true. Women mature faster and a lot of different areas on a lot of different levels before men. But you can't rush a guy into growing up. You can't rush a guy into marrying you. You can't. Marriage is a very serious covenant and our reality. It's a goddamn contract, and it's a contract. You don't want to jump quick the side, just like signing any motherfucking contract without reading the fine print.
Be careful, make sure that's something you want to do. In my opinion, don't rush, but don't be my boyfriend forever. You know what I'm saying. Now, Look, some people are okay with not being able to get married. Some people are okay with being boyfriend and girlfriend for years and years and years for decades. That runs in the black community as well. A lot of people don't get married,
but they'll stay together forever. Those other people who feel like they don't need rings and vowels and a big wedding and a reception to validate their love for one another. I get it. I know a lot of people like that to me personally, Yes, I want to get married. Yes, I want to have more children. No, I don't want to have more children until I get married. But I do want to get married. I would never pressure someone into marrying me, though it's up to you. But I'm
not gonna wait around forever, No, I'm not. Honestly, I can't say what I'll do in that situation now. If I'm with you for more than four years, you know, Alrightnigle, what we're doing, But it's not you better put a ring on my finger by this date on I'm gone, you know what I mean. That's just not how that ship should be. And then some women take it upon theirselves to propose. If a nigga wait too long, they're
gonna do the proposing. Like let me take your back to Love and Hip Hop Christie and Jim, Remember Chrissie wanted to get married very bad. They were together for a long time. You know what I mean. I don't know why the funk this niggad popped the question nither. I really wanted him to marry her. But nowadays she seems just over it. She seems like she don't give a funk anymore. But back then she really wanted to be married. All she wanted from this nigga was a commitment,
a ring, a wedding, marriage, children. I remember her saying she wanted children on Love and Hip Hop, and I felt as though that was one of the cutest couples ever. Unfortunately it hasn't happened me. I could never propose to a guy. I'm not supposed to be the one down on the knee. It ain't got nothing to do with tradition. Oh the guy is supposed to propose. No, I'm just not ever gonna get down on the knee, open up no box and say will you marry me? How? No,
what the unless I'm marrying a bit or something. I can't do that, nigga. What First of all, I got bad knees and I would never do that ship anyway. Then I'm not creasing No McQueen to ask and neg gonna marry me. It's not gonna happen. Hold up, Hold up, I know the ship getting good. But listen to just a couple of seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen, and that brings me to just fix my mess.
And I listen. I asked you all online ladies, in your opinion, when is the right time to get married? And is it a dealbreaker if he never proposes? Not like always, you'll always give me some good feedback and I'm gonna read off of you. Zalika McCrae says, funck getting married, dying, big single period. Um, bitch, what listen you You've been big hurt obviously. She's like, nah, nigga, I just see a lot of marriages failing. But you can't let that depict your future. You can't let that
control and dictate your situation. You don't know you might meet the man of your fucking dreams. Zalika, damn, just be easy, it'll come to you and if it don't, die big single like you said, I am her underscore. A Dare says, I mean they say a man should know if he wants to marry a woman within three months, not saying that you should get married within that time, but I think three years of a good relationship gives
you time to get to know a person. I agree with you somewhat, three years of a good relationship and that gives you time to get to know a person. I would say that, I say about three to five years, well three or four and a half. I don't know. I'm just I don't know. I don't like to put time and stipulations on that marriage ship. And because you know, listen, a nigga could propose to you and never marry you
like my brother. Remember I said that ship. He could propose to you just to shut you the funk up, but never marry you. Now, A Dare, I don't agree with this. I never heard this ship, she said. I mean they say a man should know if he wants to marry a woman within three months, who the fund is they and where they're at. Because I ain't never hear nobody say that they better get the funk out of here, not three months. First of all, I get side of niggas in three weeks, so I'm not sure.
You don't even know. You can not get the norm motherfucking three months. It's not gonna happen. Whoever they is been watching too many movies, h too much TV rereads zero zero zero to six says, damn, that sounds like a jail number. I need to hear answers on this one. I've been with my man for fourteen years. Actually we turned in fifteen next week and still waiting. Oh bit, you crazy fuck that when you got me fucked up now. It may not be that serious to her, Like I said,
some people actually really feel that is okay. It's okay not to get married as long as we together and we're happy. We're good to each his own. But it sounds like she she's a little mad about that ship. Like at the end of Little Bit, she's like, I'm still waiting. If you're still waiting, then bitch, maybe you need to propose them. Then go ahead and do it, chrissie, and see what happened. You never know because y'all been
together already for a decade and a half. If he ain't leave yet and ain't gonna leave now, so should just see pop the question to see what he say? Yo. Jim was like, I'm with you. What the fund does that mean? Yo? When Christy was like will you marry me? Jim said I'm with you. I would have smacked the brains off your head. I ain't even gonna lie. Hey, yo, he was as a bit too anyway. My bit Jade eight twenty says, oh my god, if he never proposed, do not give him an ultimatum, and please do not
marry someone who was quick to propose. True love is what it's about, and you only know if it's real if you're on the same page, wave level and compatibility, same love language. Love is love, no excuses. I love this, I love it. Do not give him an ultimatum, And don't marry somebody too quick. You don't want to do it, because as quick as you can get married is as quick as you can get the voiced. Nobody wants to do that ship. It's a lot of court fees and
a lot of dumb man ship to go through. Nobody wants to do that. Last one. I'm gonna read re underscore, Costa says, laughing my ass off. That ship really don't mean anything to me. But bitch, I'm giving you two years to know, three years to propose, and if we're not, we're still gonna be all good because I don't give a funk for real, Bitch, you definitely cared. Not bitch, I'm giving you two years to know, three years to propose, but I don't really give a funk for real. You
definitely give a fuck. So tell that nigga what it is, because you're really really stunting the ship and you don't got to read. You don't got to If you want to get married, that's fine. Don't let your pride be in a way, but don't chase anigo way. Even with the pride. Now, let's kick it over to a brief break, so to slide over the current news. I know y'all seen this ship. I've been thinking about it ever since. Now this is off the fucking topic. But Danny Lay
looks a little pregnant. She was in the shoe store and she was walking around and she was poking our stomach out. But it did look like a little baby. But now she wanted us to think she was pregnant, batter ship. Even if she's not, she wanted us to think that that that's like the most clowning ship ever, But it is what it is. If she is, congratulations the baby, you got a third baby on the way, and I guess we've got another song coming from me,
me and Danny Lay. Congratulate nations if you do have a button in the oven. But if you're not, you clown the funk out for sticking out your stomach because you already knew what the funk we was gonna say. And if it is the baby's baby, I hope they make it tied us in people having kids and not staying together. Honestly, that ship is clowned out as well. The Grammys and people finally get offensive this year. Was it appropriate? Was it inappropriate? M it's the Grammys. I
think the Grammys needed us. And when I say us, I mean black people for their fucking ratings this year. I think the Grammys is usually very fucking boring, not gonna lie a little inappropriate. Yeah, I mean if it was on b ET or VH one or you know what I'm saying, it would have been fine. It would have been suitable but not on like ABC, CBS and all that ship and Nah, I don't think all that explicitness should have been on there, But I mean whatever,
this is the new way of the motherfucker world. And the performances were great. I think Doja Cat killed that ship always. That's one talented bitch. I swear I love her. I love her. I tried not to love her, but I love it. I can't. You can't like you can't do not telling. The baby did great, Lord, baby always kills it. Cardi and Meghan they did good. They did good. They did good. Cardi did good, Megan did good. Now my thing is people found their Whop performance to be inappropriate.
What the funk did you think they were gonna do the name of the song is an acronym for wet ass pussy? What the funk did you think they was gonna do? Dance around and do a bunch of TikTok dances and ship in full and full outfits. Cardi was a fucking stripper, Megan is stripper inspiration. What the funk did you think was gonna come out of wet ass pussy? What the fuck? Calm the funk down. I've seen worse
we've all seen worse. Trust me. Now, listen, one thing I would never understand is the fact that Lord Wayne has no Grammys. Chris Brown has no Grammys. Nicki Minaje has no fucking Grammys. I didn't even know that. I had no idea. I just found that ship out this year. Now y'all know him in sicky fan I am. I am pissed off about that ship though. That bothers me, because what the funk. Listen, this woman has worked so fucking hard for years. She's been in a game for
more than ten years. She's worked hard as a bit. Let me tell you, y'all know this ship and has not earned one fucking Grammy. That ship pisses me off. Lord Wayne tweeted fuck the Grammys exactly he should have been. If there's any man that deserves Grammys, it is Lord Wayne. But I'm telling you all, this ship is ran by social media. It's all about views, it's all about popularity, you know what I mean. Everything feeds off of the Internet.
So yeah, it is different. It's fucked up, but it's different. I do congratulate all the nominees for being nominated. That's a big, big, big deal, and I do congratulate all of the winners. And that brings me to the end of this episode, episode number ten of Carefully Reckless. Y'all. Make sure y'all don't rush into these motherfucking marriages, and you don't give a nigga an ultimatum because one day
a nigga is gonna slap shit out. You don't ever walk in the room like my cousin Fie, who was listening right now, because I know she she regrets that ship bad at because that nigga was Stephanie. Now baby, he was stiffening and yo a ship. But don't ever walk in the room and be like you got until December to marry me, nigga, because if I'm that nigga, I'm gonna say pacal right across your motherfucking face. They're gonna make me my fucking sandwich. And that's on that.
I love y'all, and I know y'all love me back. I hope I fixed y'all mess because I'm just I see you next week. Ask back there, nice little asked back there, nice little ass back there, nice little bit, like just you got your ass, nigga, Shut the fucker. I've been out hit on my cash. Old, you bought my hustle. I've been stop. I don't give nofing getting running like it's nothing. He like, if you cut, I might just pop it. Got your bitch asking for pictures
if she ugly, I'm gonna crop it. I just left outside the office and I lay you made him like niggas with tattoos who careree gusn't And that's he lying. I'm lying. Hold me now, still back there, now, I still hold me. He'd be like, I'm lying, hold me, I'll be on the grammit or I do what's make them laugh? Now? They hear my songs and all they do what ship? They ask? The ship with crystal if you broke this piece on ask, I don't want your nigga because I heard his dick with trash or six,
I don't get tired. Seven days I did eight shows, real niggas on my side, and they don't move until I say show, and there rolls to them bank rolls. You're rolling to them. Pay So I talked it down and that's say my ship like, I'm like, hold me back, hold me can be like I'm like old mete a nice still as back still a Back Nice Still Carefully Reckless is a production of I heart Radio and The
Black Effect. For more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.