Family Affairs

dealing with this guy. This is not too long ago. I was dealing with this dude, right, and I wanted to introduce him to my cousin. Now, my cousin, if you know me, y'all know, she like my sister, my best friend, my other half. She helps me run my company. She is my executive assistant. Yes, that's my girl, my baby London. All right, No, nigga, if I am fun it with you, and I'll tell you I'm gonna introduce you to my cousin, to London. That means you come

pretty far. You've got a lot of potential behind you. Brother. I set it up perfectly. Reservations at a nice restaurant. Me and her got there first, so we're awaiting this gentleman's arrival. As we're a waiting, I'm pumping him up. I'm boosting him up. Oh he does this for me, he does that for me. He's this type of guy. Oh he's great. He's great, leaving all the minor bad ship out because it's just like, okay, nobody's perfect. Okay, I can. I can deal with this little ship. So

I'd rather not speak on that then. By the way, just so you know, my cousin is very critical, as am I with her, So you know, as vice versa, I'm critical about who the fun she funk with. She critical about who I funk with. Okay, fine, we all want the best for each other. The gentleman arrives, he sits down. He's already drunk. Okay, hopefully he can handle his look at in front of my cousin. We ain't drunk yet, but we're getting there. So Hi, this is

my cousin London, My cousin London. This is such and such. Okay, everything is great. We get around the shots after we eat. Everything is cool. This nigga just start getting disrespectful out of his motherfucking mouth. And I don't mean calling me out my name. I don't mean calling her all her name, being rude to her or whatever. This is exactly what happened. I turned to London, who I was with when I

met the gentleman years ago. So London knows this gentleman from seeing him the first day I met him, didn't hear him after that until we just got reacquainted a couple of months ago, and she hasn't seen him since then. So I said, London, this man don't believe that the first time I met him was that time I was with you down the outdoors event and blah blah blah blah blah. So London says, sir, that is the first

time that you met her I ever called that. This motherfucker opens up his mouth and says, nah, I was sucking her before that. I said, sweetheart, we're not gonna do that like this. I understand you drunk, but you need to watch your motherfucking mouth. Okay, but for your mouth be on the floor. And that's all I'm gonna say. He get the giggling. I get the giggling, but I

get the back series real quick, Okay. I can see in London's face that that comment was very cringe e. So London says, no, no, no, no, no, let's just calm down. She starts rubbing my knee. She already know the type of bitch I am, and she already know that this ain't gonna go right period. Now I am embarrassed because I bought this nigga in the presence of my cousin, someone who sometimes I look for approval from. She my big cousin. You know what I'm saying. I

grew up with her. I don't have too many cousins that I look at like that. And my whole twenty nine years of living, I introduced London to three guys, three guys, and my roster a bit long, yeah, man, Like yeah, I'm talking about the history. It's like it's a bit long, you know what I mean. Like, so she only met three of those nigas. Okay, you see what type of importance she holds. I don't just bring anybody around her, You feel me. I started to regret

it immediately. He get up and go to the bathroom. I'm telling London, she trying to calm me down. I'm like, yo, I'm I feel like, I really feel that I'm gonna slap shut out this nigga before the night is over. Brosh like that. I really really feel that, So I bring on everywhere. I don't give a funk if it's a five star restaurant or McDonald's. Nigga, I'm playing on with you. If we're sitting down eating while we're waiting for a dessert and more shots to come, I'll pull

out on. Oh he already see how piste off I am. So I guess this is his way of trying to make me feel better. Now, we are very sexual with each other. We're sexually compatible, and I love it. But this man showed me his true colors that night. He can't hold his liquor at all. And this is how I know. He shuffood. I debt while I'm daling. I like to make bets for that. You know what I'm saying. Y'all know I like it. I win all the time,

So why wouldn't I bet As I'm dealing. This nigga looks up and he says, if I win, you're giving me some head to night right strike three? Now you're done. Needless to say, I don't feel the same about that motherfucker anymore. I'm telling you, yo, listen, it is so funny how you can love everything about a person right in the beginning, even in the middle. Fuck then you know what I mean, You can love everything about them to the point where you overlook minor ship because everybody

got something with them. You know, nobody's perfect. Isn't it amazing and shocking how fast all that ship can change within a blink of an eye. That motherfucker can do one thing and turn you completely off. Now I'm Innaquarius. I'm not really big on astrology, but I do embody some of the characteristics, and you know, some of the traits of what they say a true Aquarius is okay. And one of the things that I do notice that they say about my sign is once you're turned off,

you're turned off. That's completely the funk it because it happened that night. That's where he knew he fucked up. That was it. I ain't look at the motherfucker right since and this was just last week. It's like, once you start to give a motherfucker a lot of you, not even all of you. Because I'm very adamant about that, I don't want to give you all of me just yet. I want to used to be six months in before I give you all, you know, but I gave a lot,

goddamn me, a lot, a good seventy percent. You was waiting on that cool thirty you feel me, but you had seventy You know what what I made me, dropped that ship down to I don't look at him the same. Yeah, sometimes I still find myself missing the sex, but you can get good sex from anywhere. You got to have every type of quality to gain my interests and to keep it. That ain't how you keep me. And then another thing, ladies and gentlemen, When my cousin bought it

to this nigga's attention, he didn't apologize. When I bought it to this nigga's attention, after me calming down and and you know, getting myself together because y'all know how I can be, he did not apologize. In fact, he flipped the whole ship on me. That's the most toxic shit if I ever seen it. Listen, you can go, you can stay where the funk you at. Uh, actually, you can go back to whoever the funk you was with before, because that's probably why you ended up that

person's X anyway, You're dumbass nigga. So now you're fucked up. That's it. That's all you gotta do is disrespect me after I'm telling you to stop disrespecting me and then get done. Hold up, Hold up, I know the ship getting good. But listen to just a couple of seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen. That brings me to the carefully reckless discussion. Needless to say, my cousin, don't funk with the nigga, because I didn't funk with the nigga, And no, I did not expect

for her to funk with him after that. She didn't want to see him again the full a second time after that. This is what happens when you know your family, when you know yourself. You know what I'm saying. You pick up on ship early. Now. No, I did not post that nigga, never have never will now, you know that,

because it ain't gonna go in the whales now. And I was just like, we're in that stage where he trying to figure out my angle and not have already figured out that I was done, you know what I'm saying. So for him. It's like, oh, ship, Now I gotta try to do all this to get back. Now, I gotta try to. Now, I gotta try to. Now, I

gotta try to. But if you wasn't growing enough to realize that you were wrong and and that you immediately should have made a you turn and apologized and tried to de escalate what had escalated you was done, you should have known. You lost me, big fellow, You lost me, chap. And that's just what that is. That's how I feel

about the situation. So today's topic is that of your family not liking your woman or your man, and ship like your family having issues with the person you're dating, because that's exactly what happened in my world last week, y'all. Now you have to think about it. If this is going on with you and your significant other, you have to step back and realize what's going on. Why do they not like him? Why do they not like her? Is it's something that he or she has done and

the eyes of them. It could be many different reasons why your family don't get along with your boyfriend or your girlfriend, or your wife or your husband. It could be so many reasons. It could be something that that person is doing to you. My cousin London did not like the nigga because of how he disrespected me. Now listen, I'm also tell you that not the first time he did that ship to me. But I do notice it happens when he's drunk, so bing lightbulb. Don't fucking drink

around me or fall back on that ship. Get your ship together. I don't deserve that. I don't deserve that. As rough and tough as I am, I'm a good goddamn girl. I'm a great woman to a man, I'm a good goddamn girlfriend. I'm great. I'm wife the material nigga. That's what gods need to understand how to treat the right ones. I don't give a funk what happened in

your past. If you didn't let that go yet, you don't need to be here obviously, as you If you keep losing women, if you keep losing women all these but just keep then it ain't the bitch as baby as you. You need to figure yourself out, figure out what the funk you can do to be better, because this ain't it. Also, both men and women can attract the same type of people. I'm not gonna say wrong, but you know you, I'm gonna let you say that. You can. Y'all can say wrong if y'all want um.

But I hear a lot of people I keep attracting these same type of dudes. Da da da da. That was my problem for a long time. You know, like you have to work on yourself. You have to see what is it in me that keeps attracting these broken men or these broken women, These men who don't have it all together mentally, but they got it all together on the outside or vice versa. You know what I'm saying.

Women we nurture naturally. So if a man they got it all together, it's automatically in our DNA to help them with whatever, not do everything for them, not allow them to use us as not what I'm saying. That's two different things, but to help them with that encouragement, help them endure the ship that they go through. You know what I'm saying. We as women, that's why we represent the backbone of the man. That's where you hear that behind every man there's a strong woman, you know

what I'm saying. And if you want to get real technical, behind every man there's a strong black woman. I'll just lamed this lame. So there can be many different reasons, many different reasons. Sometimes the person might not even do nothing. You just gotta hate and mass family. You just got a messy ass family. You just got a family who like the next person better. There has been times where I've heard this ship before. Oh don't like my new

boyfriend because they liked Charles. Oh well, bitch, Charles ain't animals, so tell them gonna find Charles ship. You know what I'm saying. Only when you let your family's opinion of your boyfriend or girlfriend affect you to the point where it shows to your companion or your significant other, that's what it is, because then you're now showing that person that they can't even trust you. How the fun your family don't like me, and you're letting that ship rub

off on you. How the funk can't you put them in their place? Why can't you make me feel important? Because your family don't feel like I am? You know, that's when it becomes a problem. In my case, he did that ship to himself. He made my cousin not like him, and now I'm happy he did not meet the rest of my family because I got a lot of critical Motherfucker's not only London, trust me, it's a lot more. London is just my closest cousin, my closest family member, so she knows me in and out. Aim

as her. I know her in and out. You know, Now, you also have jealous family members. Okay, you may have a boyfriend or a girlfriend that you bring around your family and the females and your family may not like her because you're pretty. Now listen that that may sound stupid, but it's a lot of that bullshit out here. That's why a lot of females can't get along to this day, because if you're beautiful, you're automatically intimidating and people automatically

think you're stuck up ship like that. I see that ship in everyday life, so I know how it feels to be put in a category that you ain't even in, you know what I mean, just based off of your looks. A lot of times, ex girlfriends still get attached to family. Ex boyfriends are still attached to the family of their exes, so when the new person comes along, it's kind of hard to make space for that new person because that X is lingering still get rid of that motherfucker, or

get rid of your family. I know you'll like what how many get rid of my family? You will find a motherfucking way. If this new person is good for you, if this new person shows you something that you never felt before, if if they're not lacking, if they're you know, like I said, everybody got their ship. But if the good outweighs the bad, you need to stick with that person. Don't rob yourself of love because your family don't want it to happen. Because your family can't let go of

Shanisha and and your baby mother and ship like that. Whatever, you ain't with that person no more. So listen, I need you all to respectfully, respectfully stay out of my relationships, okay, because I'm trying to make it work with Christina over here, and y'all keep inviting Shanisha over here and ship. I'm not with that bitch no more. She doing her It's the reason why I ain't together, and vice versa. For women, a lot of moms get attached to boyfriends. That's what

I noticed. A lot of moms get attached to girlfriends. It would be to mom. Some of the dad's just you know, Dad's just let be whatever be. But you know, like moms are the ones, y'all got the break away, y'all got to break it off. When you break it off, you gotta tell your mother to break up too. I see a lot of that ship happening now. Just because in my situation, don't like the niggot. I don't. I

don't look at him the same. You know, I don't really funk with him like that anymore because of that, and then because of the aftermath of him not want to apologize. But that may not be the case for some of you. Some of you might have a guy who wants to redeem himself who immediately realized what he did was wrong and try to you turn it and come back and de escalate the situation. There are guys like that. There are guys willing to admit, oh shoot, I did funk that. Shut up, man, let me. I

can't lose out on her. She's a good thing, she's a good person. I want to make it work with her. You know, it's nothing wrong with that. Don't be quick to kick and Nigken to the curb, you know what I'm saying, Especially if you see that he's trying, and he's apologetic, and he knows what he got and he knows he don't want to lose it. That's what matters the most. If you love me, you'll listen to this

commercial and then we'll be right back. Now that brings me to just fix my mess now, y'all know I always always ask y'all about y'all life experiences as it relates to mine. So I want to Instagram and I post it. I said, hashtag carefully reckless your man slash woman's family ever not like you? How does it impact your relationship? If so be honest, go little dot paint of Heney on Instagram says it makes it hard to

be with each other. We can't spend holidays together and if my family don't like you, I just can't see us being together for long. It's uncomfortable. Okay, now, there are a few things I want to disagree with in your response a little paint of Heney, I just I feel like you're right. It does make ship uncomfortable, especially if you're a family person, if you are always around your family, if you're very family oriented. I do understand

how it can be uncomfortable for you. It could be kind of awkward, But like I said earlier in episode, don't walk around and miss out on a good thing and lose a good thing because your family's opinions matter more than your love for the person. You understand what I'm saying now. You didn't give me any clarity on on what you know, short he did or whatever this is a guy, what Shorty did or you know, I don't know, you know your sex for a purpose, but you didn't give me any type of clarity on it.

So I'm just gonna speak on what you gave me. Um, if it's uncomfortable for you, it depends on what the girl did. It depends on whoever you're dating. Did they do something for your family not to funk with them? If not, then you know you just like your damn family, you know what I'm saying. Then you always you always gonna let them be in a way, so they're gonna always be in a way. So that's it. How does it impact your relationship go Bi? But Rodriguez says it doesn't.

We remain cordial due to our love for him, me as wife, her as sister. We don't talk and it's not beef on site, But you're lucky if it's a high and buy. Okay. So she's very very straightforward with her ship. No, I ain't got no problems with you, but don't give me none either, Okay, I get it. It's more so we don't funk with each other, but we're very cold. You we can be in the same room. That's what it's given. She said, Hi, and by if you're lucky ho. But when you got fighting. Uh. But

you know what I'm saying, keep your distance. And I'm gonna keep mind because it's all about the love for him, all about the love for him. Now, what I got from that is he don't let his sister across the boundaries because the wife don't seem like she play okay, which is good, Which is good. That's a strong willed woman who ain't gonna let nobody funk with her. Okay. So I do respect that. That's good. As long as you can keep it cordial, you're good with me as

good for both sides, the family and the relationship. Mob Tie said, it don't this between me and you. I love them, but I love you and we are the future. Whether we'll accept it or not, it don't matter as long as me and you on the same page were golden. And that was from a guy. I want to give a shout out to the guys. Y'all have been coming through on a carefully reckless responses. I really really do. Although you need to learn some goddamn gramdmar sir, that

ship was harder ship reading that. But basically what he's saying is, I don't let my family talk about my girl, and I don't let my girl talk about my family. I love my family and I love my girl. And as long as me and my girl on the same page were golden, As long as me and my family on the same page were golden, it ot mad at who the fun y'all don't like? Because I love a period. I like that. That's the third guy. Oh, we're coming up on a woman, Adrian dot loves Jason. Oh she's

about to tell us about Jason. She says, the father of my children has a stupid bitch of a mother who is extremely jealous of the relationship that I had with her son. I say had because she is the main reason why we are in a physical relationship. This bitch acts like she's fucking her son. It's crazy and through the years has turned other people in his circle against me. All I have to say is Corona got a lot, but Mr Field, hold on, hold on, wait a minute, whold lot? Wait? Huh huh, Adrian, I'm at

to talk to you off site. Okay, I'm at to talk to you all off of offline. You know what I mean, like because oh my god. Now listen, she put that ship as co harder than she could. But you gotta understand more women go through this more often than not. I'm telling you this ship happens. I was dating guy that whose mother didn't like me either. No, I would wish Corona on it, but ship, you never know what that man's mother did to that woman. You know.

I do want to keep your my prayers and ship because I can see you you real violent like you reminds me of Remy. We we gotta keep you in our prayers. Little God, how'd your guns all right? T? Dot Riches says, if your woman slash man supports the family's behavior of not liking you, it impacts negatively and gravely, almost divorce level. I imagine it wouldn't be that bad if your woman slash man supports your outlook on it that's actually correct. Now, I don't have anything to say

about that, because that's exactly what I said before. If you support the idea of not liking your companion because of your family, then that's on you. That's on you. You will never be happy because you choose your family over your love life when they have nothing to do with that level of your life. Like, that's a different type of love. The love that I can make to my wife. I can't make love to my family. So you'all gonna need to stay on your side of the offence.

It's how I come over there for to cookout ship and the last one I'm gonna read shy baby, nin no one. It don't affect me. I ain't sucking his mama. And then I love it it, I love it, I love it, I love it now. Depending on how close the guy is with his mom, usually it does mess up the relationship because you got a lot of mama's boys out here. But then you just have men who genuinely respect their mother's but they're not gonna let their

mother step in. They're really not. At one point in time, I felt as if little Scrappy wasn't gonna make it with baby because of Mama d But that one episode where he stepped up and he told his mother, listen, Mom, I love you, but she wanted to stay the funk up on my relationships. You know what I'm saying, Like, I love this woman. I want to give her, I want to make on make a family with her, Like Okay, me and Erica didn't work, but look, you ain't gonna do what you did with me and Erica with me

and baby. This is my wife right here. I'm gonna marry this girl like blah blah blah blah blah. He stepped the funk up and he got it together. Now we knew a little scrapy was a mama's boy, but we really said until Loving hip Hop shout off the Love and hip Hop for for showcasing those types of situations, because that ship is real. That ship is real. And then vice versa. You had Rashida and Kirk going through the ship and then you had her mother, Rashida's mother.

I felt like she inserted herself a little bit too much in some of these situations, like especially when she ran over Kirk. Mike, you know what I'm saying, like, or you ain't your mother gonna have to pay for that ship, you know what I'm saying. But no, no, no, I realized that Rashida's mother played a big role in her life to the point where she was present for conversations she shouldn't even have been present for. You know what I'm saying. There's a grown woman. You're murried. You

know you got murried, you know you have sex. You made these babies by yourself. You need to tell Mama to sit back on a couple of little situations. Now, we've never been privy to the conversation between Rashida and her mother telling her mom, let me just have this. I don't know if there ever was an episode when she did that, and I missed it, but she could have done it off camera. But either way, Rashida and Kirk are still going strong and I love to see it.

I love to see it ray J and Princess. I felt like his mother had a little bit too much to do with the ship, honestly, I did. But that is a very tight knit family. We've seen that. We've seen it ever since some kids was younger, you know what I'm saying, ever since they was acting, ever since Moesia and the other show that reg had whatever. You know what I'm saying, like, they have a very tight knit family, and I know that their mother runs pretty

much runs their businesses. You know, she she acts as you know, but their manager, I think so, don't quote me, but she was also invested in Ray J's love life like extremely and we've seen how that made Princess feel all of that ship. You know, a lot of these franchises shows us Jim Jones mother, Oh my god, we see we don't even need to talk about that. We've seen how that affected Jim and Chrissy. But Chrissy was not to be played with. Jim loved Chrissie and Jim

loved his mama, and it didn't matter. As many times as Jim tried to put his mother in her place, it was just like, no, nigga, this what I'm gonna you came out of my poem. Poem, motherfucker, and just you're gonna respect this. She's gonna respect me, you know what I mean. Loving and hip hop over the years has shown us what that's like. And all I'm saying is, don't let it be you that brings me to the

end of my carefully Reckless episode. Y'all. Y'all right, me and my dam and tell me what I should do about this nigga. Should I just like stalk completely over with this nigga because I told you all that he only act like this when he drunk. Or should I just be back on the market because I don't really give a listen once you once you turned me off, I'm turning off, nigga. I'm turned off. And like I said,

you can find good dick anywhere. So tune in next Wednesday on hump Day and then my best Pam voice piece. Carefully Reckless is a production of I Heart Radio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from My Heart Radio, visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.