Welcome to Can't Flee Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio and the Black Effects, And just like that, we're back with yet another Can'tfully Reckless episode with your girl just hilarious. Look, I got a special guests in the building, somebody who ain't been here in a long, long long time.
No, it's not Taylor, it's excuse me.
You got a little bit too much going on. You got you got, you got too much going on with the sound effects and the huffing and puffing like you're about to blow a house down and share the girl, say, what's up to my best friend?
That's my best friend period.
So she here today. We're gonna go over this mess and she's gonna help me fix y'all ship. Y'all listen, we got some holiday stories.
You tell me we was doing that. Yeah, we got some holidays. Hey, yo, yo, you got to help me fix these people masks. It's the holidays and people going through some ship y'all.
Right, come on, y'all, all right, don't come up here like doing all this.
Come on, I need more, all right.
So this was a long a story, but I had to basically summarize it. So this man started beefing with his girl around holidays every year around the holidays. Lay not yet, and she's starting to think it's on purpose to avoid getting her gifts. Yeah, so she asked me, what did she think she should do. She basically like, leave him or whatever, because this is the third year in the world that he's done this.
They've been together for four years. The first year, he didn't do this. Shit. The second year, yeah, it was a beef.
She just thought it was like a little quarrel, a little speed bump in a relationship. The third year, he went to go spend Christmas the New Year's at his mom's house without her, didn't even invite her, and she said they reconvened after the New Year and shit. And then this year he's starting to pick, like he's been picking with her since, you know, since Thanksgiving up. Okay, well, I've been through something similar before, but it was birthdays.
So the first birthday was in the beginning of the year, so they would get all that ship this the beginning of the year. My birthday in October, so come October we beefing every year.
And I'm like, wait a minute, and then roll back around to February. Uh, now shit.
Cool, shit cool because Valentine's Day, yeah, and then the birthday coming up, so it's like, you know, everything good, Okay, So yeah, I would say definitely I stayed longer than I should have.
But I would definitely say the book up out of it.
And now when you say you stayed longer than you should have, was it because everything else that was happening, like it was that like the only thing that was like the only thing was in love? Yeah, yeah, yeah, all niggas was in love and ship. Oh my god, anyway, please, I mean, so I loudly hellout, excuse.
Clean through, I got a little cool. Oh what the fuck are you doing in here sitting next to me? Shit, I got a fucking daughter who's going on four months. You can't trying to be six for sick for Christmas? Damn.
And I got two shows. So anyway, anyway, it's so wild sick right now, he's gonna send me the is something going around a way, He's something going around this country ship anyway. So all right, so you was in love? So maybe yeah, maybe she just in love too, because this is the third year that she said that he has actually picked like picked fights, like started like little beefs or whatever. And she caught on the second year,
but she didn't want to make it a thing. But this year is definitely a thing, and she wants to know what.
She should do.
I think you should sit down with that, nigga. I'm like, nah, no, nigga started of sitting down.
Niggas tied of sitting down.
Yeah, yeah, out of the baby will stand up ship, stand up and talk and walk out the door.
Don't be telling nobody to leave. It's like, and what a thing? Got Like, all right, what kind of work does he do? Like you do this year? And then next year in the gift of that Oh my no, where you put it like that?
It's like no, but she even gets to the bottom of it. He already put into He already does he did, he already started like three times.
All right, so it is the pattern. Yes, we do know.
I still all right, even if she don't, I think she should still sit down with him and talk some about it.
Let her let him know. Like, look, I'm sure she did this three times, she said.
The first time she didn't, the second time she ain't want to make it a big deal, and the third year she noticing it I'm at the point where I'm not I'm not doing no more repeating myself, you know. So I'm like this, look, you don't get it all right, maybe two times, but come on, yeah.
For this, how did I get it? She' I'm like, oh, she was. That's why I said they'd be leaving hell of met off the bone.
You know, I'm about to start putting a form on the website, like you have to be able to tell me a lot more about shit. We know something, but we don't know everything. We need to know how old y'all are, Like what kind of work he does? Because to be honest with you, listen, I can even sympathize with him if that's what that's I don't care.
No, no, no, I'm not going to start beefs. But as an adult, as a.
Thirty two year old woman, oh no, Christmas is very expensive and I'm like, everybody feel like they should get something.
Fuck no, I feel like if you ain't, if you.
Ain't my children, then now I barely got something for Chris baby, I barely got something for my mom and my dad.
Shit, y'all got me and my beautiful child.
Oh please please, Now you don't even have no house, you don't have no bills, you don't have nothing.
You need to get everybody something you don't want with all the moody shit, send me on a trip.
Shit, man, y'all these people don't went to Jamaica without me because I was stuck breastpeeding.
You know you were stuck at work.
Oh, baby, never been stuck at Yeah, you was big stuck because you had to come back after having that little baby. Yeah, the little baby that cried when she saw you.
Yeah. Yeah, because she's jealous of me. What she tried to steal my best friend all the baby. Oh damn, Hold up, hold up.
I know the ship getting good, But listen to just a couple of seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen anyway. Yeah, back to this the lady story. Talk to him, honey, I think you should talk to this man.
Because I mean, it's some some stories are just obvious. Some ship is just obvious. Like to me, it's just like you know, I love going through the struggle. I know, get you a woman, Okay.
Uh uh No, we are not pushing. We're not pushing the gay agenda. No, we are not pushing.
Don't do that. But yeah, I mean I feel but yeah, do something.
But all right, because I want to also know she needs to update me, because I want to also know do you get him gifts every year?
I mean not getting anything? Like is he not getting you shit? Doing everything? Okay?
Well yeah, or she wouldn't be writing me. But did you not get nothing for Christmas in the past three years?
Like is it just like.
Or is it like the bare minimum he's doing or is it just the fact that he's picking arguments to not have to spend time with you, or because you just said the thing about gifts, but the second year you said he went and spent Christmas with his parents and shit and didn't even invite you. What about other holidays and like, yeah, birthdays and things like that?
Do he shot up for you? Yeah?
So I think you need to like give us a little bit more you know, context around this or whatever, because I ain't trying to have you leave somebody when it can really just be a conversation, or I ain't trying to have you stayed with somebody when.
It's really downhill, like nah, it ain't.
Nothing else to say, it's like nah, yeah, nah, nah, that's that's petty we together, and we together, you can tell me if it's because you're struggling, nigga, open communication.
Let me know.
Look, I ain't got it with the ship that you want to be too expensive, so I don't know.
Or baby, every day is Christmas for you or every month is Christmas, so.
It's like yo, I mean, I ain't really got it this time, anything like there needs to be a communication.
You don't tell me you talk to him? No, not every year?
But what unless the man got another bit somewhere? Shit, because that seemed like that's what you are trying to hear that for three years straight. Oh baby, my pocket is no, I can't do it. Like no, nigga, what if I asked one of burking, what if she want to like you know what I'm saying, what yeah, what if she want something that this man cannot afford every year? What if she is you know, because the first year he had no problems, That's what did she said?
The first year? No, they was together four years.
The first year he you know, they bought each other gifts every day, spent Christmas together, everything was good. The next year she said, he picked a fight and you know he didn't get her anything for Christmas, yeah said, or anything and so updated, and I'm let us know what's going on on kind and by the time they updated,
she won't be here. So let me know what the fuck is going on, and we're gonna move on, all right, all kind, all right, So again I'm summarizing because I want to get It's three Christmas stories that I chose, and I think these are they all three of them are different. Yes the fuck this person doesn't get along with their family, but they want advice on keeping it cool on Christmas. Okay, so you don't get along with the whole family. Now this person did say the whole family.
She only gets along with her two aunts and her cousin. But they have a really really big family and they they the grandmother has a huge, huge, huge home and they all meet there. They all meet there for Christmas every year. But she has an issue with basically the whole family outside of her two aunts and her cousin, and but she wants to want advice on how she can keep it cool, just going in on fucking say shit, because obviously if everybody got a problem with she you the problem, she judge.
But that's all we're going on.
For Yeah, because if it's a big, big, big family. Now she said, it's about three full fucking are you sure she ain't say you more than that?
No? What that like her? Yeah? Just two aunts?
Oh no, she says she has a very problematic family. Everybody's toxic and they all have a problem with her. So don't sit down and say she's a problem So everybody niggas is weird. No, no, no, no, I'm not to believe everybody just got a problem with you. If they're problematic and toxic, then everybody shouldn't like each other.
You know what I'm saying. It should be more beefs than just with her.
No that it's only two aunts and a cousin that you fuck with, And I imagine these are the family members that.
That she comes for.
Like, because I wouldn't go, I don't family or not if I know y'alln't fuck with me, and I don't fuck with y'all, I'm.
Not showing up, said Jing Google and Google Bell Like, no, I don't give a fuck. We know, I'm trying to make a plate.
Not if everybody don't like you, and not if you don't like everybody, you're not eating my food.
Baby, never call.
My turkey if the fuck I don't like you, Yeah, all right for Christmas, I've never not liked you.
Make a turkey for I made up certain even thinks givings and you are any here because you ain't call me back? Why the fuck do I need to call you? She need you?
Listen, You're a pop up in my house even when I fuck, I'm not dead, I come home you on my pool, baby, So please, what the fuck do I need to call you back for? Because I called you whatever? And I live for yo, I lived so fucking far from her, but she drives and she a driver for her fucking career.
Baby, drive every day. So it's like, why you can't drive my house when I call you? Call me back? The point is what we're gonna tell this lady about this? Yeah?
So yeah, I can't do my podcast. You be not helping people. We fucking fussing each other. All right, just tell her? I mean all right, I'm telling you.
Okay to you don't even remember the story. She got a.
Problem with her family, Yeah, yeah, family met us. So try to work be with your to try to work it out whatever the issue is. You know, y'all gott to talk, y'all gott to come together, Yeah, and figure this thing out.
I need more information.
Yeah, like wow, now and listen and listen. I'm summarizing these but she really didn't give me much. She didn't say where the beef came from. She didn't say she did she she is thirty eight, so I feel like she's a little too old to be mean. She's a little bit too old to be dealing with this ship. Don't have Christmas by your damn self.
Yeah, she got kids.
She don't have children. Oh no, she's not. She don't have children. She's not married. Shane's saying she got a man or not, but she she don't have kids and she's not married. So this is and you know why, probably because she's fucking problematic and toxic on her way to forty just just just fucking everything up.
You know what I'm saying. That's crazy. You don't so you are inside? Why? Because man, your family don't like you even.
Excuse my family love me exactly, so you don't even know how I don't like them.
Hey, I'm joking. I'm joking.
I love my family, right, but I don't know I feel like she I'm going to encourage therapy, I will say, you know, I mean, because I mean and with like I said, I'm summarizing, But she did seem like she wanted to be around her family.
She did want like she.
Still wanted to be around them, because, like she said, family and fellowship during the holidays just goes together, and she just wanted to be around some love, you know what I'm saying.
She lives by herself and and cousins.
She yo she could be bipolar, she could be schizophrenic. She could like have an.
Issue with like I don't know.
I was ready to say she could just have an issue with everybody individually, but who knows, Like you don't just do that, like you know what I'm saying it.
But she could be an introvert.
She could be introvert, but introverts usually everybody still be liking introverse Like it ain't like she says, she don't get along with her family at all, none of them except for those three. So I think she needs to seek out therapy because I feel like she's the common denominator underlying it. Might, yeah, it might might most definitely be an underlying issue. Yeah, I think you should seek
out therapy definitely. And it's this pamphlet that like a little holiday book on grief miess for it's have a merry Little Grief Miness or whatever how people handle and navigate being alone and losses and just pain and trauma, like how they handle that during the holidays or whatever. And the author is Shanti Dies. She was up at breakfast club. And the pamphlet is like, I wish I knew the address, I would send it to you. I
would gift to you for free. But it's only about twelve or thirteen dollars and it just gives you healthy tips on how you can navigate through, you know, your emotions at a time like this. You know, it teaches you about recognizing your boundaries and recognizing you know, how pains of like different different trauma and stuff can haunt
you more. And then how it also is a part in there that tells you, like it helps you with like being on social media, because being on social media during the holidays and seeing people with their families and shit like that, and seeing people like with their parents and having fun and all that that can that can push you further into your depression or you know, I can stress you the fuck out, and you home already
alone and you know, lonely and shit. Because this girl said that she goes to our family even though they they don't fuck with her like that she don't fuck with them, she still goes there.
You know, what I'm saying shows that it shows that she's alone too. She says she lives alone.
No kids, no man, you know, I mean, no no marriage, like she's just that I'm not married and I don't have kids. So she didn't say, well, she had a boyfriend, girlfriend or whatever, but she obviously obviously is not socially where she wants to be. If you love me, you'll listen to this commercial and then we'll be right back. So I yeah, I do encourage therapy, and just keep me updated, bull and just you know, next time you
update me, update me with more detail. I mean, your story wasn't too long, but I still, for the sake of this only being a twenty minute episode that I wanted to drop on Christmas, I shortened it up. So I know I'm not leaving anything out, but I think you need to drop some more information. But happy holidays, bro, I try to get through that, all right.
We got one more story.
Like, Okay, now this person can't decide which family to spend the time I was cleaning my fucking throat.
So person, oh, I probably caught it from you, motherfucker. I ain't that quick shit. I don't know. Person ain't. No, no, you better know. So this person can't decide which family to spend time with. Got a baby mother right right now? He not with his baby mama.
Okay, they haven't been together in six years, but he never missed the usually he usually yes, you know, he's been with his girlfriend for a year and this will be their first Christmas together. Yeah, and well they not he said eight months, but after Christmas it'll be a year or whatever more into twenty twenty five. But like he he loves his girlfriend like there's no complaints, no nothing.
His baby mother don't give him problems.
His girlfriend is never beefed with the baby mom, but she has an issue that he wants.
To spend Christmas with his kids. They got two boys and the girl the girlfriend have an issue with that.
The girlfriend got yeah, because she's like, why do you have to spend the night over there? Yeah, So they do this thing where they do like it's like a whole Christmas Eve. They watch movies, they big cookies for Santa, They do the elf on the shelf thing. And she cool with the baby mother. She has met the baby mom and she because she has met his kids. Yeah, she's he said, the baby Mather is like not like beefing at all. He now with stuck out me. He said he don't think she has feelings for him.
Yeah, he said he don't think she do. He said, he moved.
He's not he don't have feelings for her, but he don't think that she got feelings for him usually you know when y'all yeah, yeah, and he said he would. He said that if his kids were weren't so young, it wouldn't be a problem. But his kids are three two and you know, they got like Stairstep kids, so they're pretty young.
Do the baby mother have a boyfriend? No, she does not.
M He said that she dates, but she don't bring She hasn't brought a man around the children.
A man has never been in the house to his knowledge. So I just feel like, WHOA.
Okay, So it's a different it's a couple of different ways to dissect this here. Because the girlfriend, while I do understand how she feels.
I understand that ship.
I mean, there's no way getting around even thinking like that, Like why the fuck do you need to go spend the night with them? Yeah, I don't think he needs I can go. Yeah, that's what I'm about to say. I would make it a family.
Especially if the baby mother cool with the girlfriend. That's what I was asking that.
Yeah, but I do believe because he said he don't think she's over him.
And where do you sleep after y'all put the kids to bed?
Do you sleep in the room with the kids or do you sleep on the couch?
Do you sleep with her? Like what?
I'm pretty sure all of this is going to go through the girlfriend's mind if you do still take it.
That's something he would have changed.
If he's if he's serious about this girlfriend and they're like everything's going good, he would have to really consider He got to consider her feelings absolutely, and he's gonna have to change all that spending the night. Now, I'm going over there as fire. You know, I would even enjoy going with him if I was the girlfriend.
They're cool like that way.
It makes you feel more comfortable and you're with their relationship as well. Because you have to deal with this person anyway, because that's his baby mother.
You're gonna have to deal with it.
Yes, So I would say, you know, make your rounds like old, stop past there with the kids, enjoy yourself with them, go with the girlfriend and you know, yeah yeah, and really bring people together.
If you're really serious about this young lady, then yeah, because I know you love your kids.
I know you love your kids, but a part of it is not really about the kids.
For the girlfriend.
The girlfriend is like, yo, y'a ain't been together in six years and you still spending you know what I'm saying.
But this is something that they've been doing for a few years now.
That's because he didn't I guess he was single before that, so this is like a a problem to him now. He hasn't talked to either one of them yet. He did say, but he was like, yo, I just want to know what I should do.
Now. That's advice on a girlfriend.
Now on the on the baby mom, you need to really sit with her and figure out all y'all done or not, Like if she thinks that y'all finished or whatever, y'all need to figure that shit out, okay, because you
can't be straddling the fence with that ship. You said you love your girlfriend, and you also don't want to confuse your children, you know what I'm saying, because if you don't live with them already, and daddy just come over, you know, and and and you play Santa Claus and then they wake up in the middle of the night and see mommy kids saying Santa Clans. You know what I'm saying that, But yeah, you need to sit down and be honest with yourself.
First.
I think you know your baby mother ain't over you. However, she has never given your girlfriend no problems. That ain't the problem. The problem would be your girlfriend sitting at home by herself wondering what the fuck is going on at night, you know what I'm saying. So that's gonna be that's gonna make her feel uneasy, and then that's going to create tension in your household. So you either take her or you tell your baby moms you can't spend the night. I can be there early Christmas morning
for my kids. I can be their lead at night Christmas Eve for my kids, but I can't stay the night.
Yeah, that's it. We can add and the kids gonna be fine. You can. You showed up. You showed up for them.
They're not gonna miss the be They won't even be worried about to stay in the night Parduct.
That's right. That nigga need to update us though, because I need to know what happened in the new year. And just like that, we've come down it and yeah we done. I got to go and do the news. Do you work?
Oh well, baby, you can record John goddamn podcast pitchaw.
I'll see y'all in the new year.
Can't Fully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.