Welcome to Can't Flee Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio and the Black Effects.
Oh shit, be back on the air.
Welcome back to yet another carefully reckless episode with your girl Jess.
Hilarious.
I'm gonna be fixing the mess. Hold on, let me get this flm out my throat now, y'all took a vacation. I know a lot of y'all saw the vacation, the vacation that I went on. Yes, I had fun, and I work very very very very very hard, y'all, and I just wanted to enjoy the fruits of my labor last week. And I could have done a podcast from Mexico, but I just wanted to. It seemed like every time I go on vacation, that's all I do is work, because the industry that I'm in.
Is a little different. If you don't work, you don't make no goddamn money.
So you know, I can't take off and then still get paid for vacation leave, and shit, I work for myself, so I could have very well done that, but I knew that y'all would understand that even I have to clock out sometimes and not be just hilarious, but.
Be more of Jessicamore.
Y'all and I had the best time, but now it's time to get back to work because y'all been missing me. So we're about to jump right in now. This is someone who has an update. I'm gonna give y'all just a quick backstory on what she's updating us on. All right, So sometime last year, this lady had wrote this to me. My best friend been married for eleven years with a boyfriend of nine years who was married to his wife of over fifteen years. I've been in this friendship and
Saint it all play out very peaceful, non toxic. Both of the men.
Love that girl to death.
Her husband will kill her if he ever found out about the boyfriend that treats her like gold. I'm scared for her, and the one time I tell her about herself, we end up falling out and the wife gets a message about them. And I would have never done that, but she thought it was me that told her just because we fell out. Furthermore, I am married ten years, but her shit got me on my husband case all the time. Anyway, should I try to fix us or
say fuck us? For her to think that I told that woman that I got a pick of them, and I would want to tell her business like that.
All right.
So I don't know if y'all remember that, but I gave her some really, really really keen advice. Yeah, you might want to let that relationship go until she finished doing what she doing, because you don't want that to spell over into your marriage. And you already admitted that it has been doing that. I know our husband was probably like the fuck, what the fuck?
I knew, you know what I mean?
So and then also, I hope you didn't share that with your husband because your husband probably would be looking at you like, well, why are you still friends with this bitch? I mean, uh uh Wayne condoning that shit, you know what I mean? So I definitely get it. I would definitely I would have fallen back from her
as a friend. You know, that was just her guilty conscience, thinking that you automatically told the wife because she thought that she was just moving that slick for nine years and nobody was ever gonna find out about you messing with this other married man and you're a married woman as well. So this is what she has to say, guys. She's she came back and said, update on the love triangle and lost friendship.
Here it is, Hey, Jess, I just want to give you an update on the love triangle advice that you gave me about my friend of twenty years and all that good stuff and all her relationships. I didn't give you as much context. No, the husband of course didn't know. The boyfriend didn't know. As a matter of fact, he don't been in the husband face that I've been in my face. It's like a big old, r weird family
m craziest shit I ever seen. But just to update on that situation, me and her have not we have spoke about that situation, but I decided to move out her way. I can't be in a person life where there's standard there there are more rules. Is that fucked up? And and and don't have a conscience of what you're doing. You know, everybody don't. Ain't nobody perfect and everybody make mistakes, he all. I I have made some myself, But you know, I just can't live in no wrongdoing for years like
that to anybody. So it's like, I, she's just not my type of person anymore to deal with so far as a friendship is done, and I just love her
from a distance as far as the affairs. She stayed in as long as she could, up until I was held at gunpoint behind her saying she's with me, and she was with me, she was with the do and I'm at my house with a gun at me because of her husband knowing she played some kind of games and it was a mess, and I knew it was going to end up and something deadly or something really really horrific that will end up happening, and me just trying to tell her to stop is the one that
had a gun point at me. But long story short, she sat in her cake into the motherfucking cake, smushed in her own face because it's over. For that situation. The wife knows, everybody knows. She ended up being exposed in a terrible way and got super duper messy. But all I can do is just pray for But I just wanted to give you the heads up again for
that's what it was. She was in a relationship with this merried man for going on ten years and she was married for that long, and it was just a very disturbing situation that I just knew it was going to hit her in the face. Didn't want it to be as bad as it did. I don't want to put too much context out there, but just know she ain't got no fingers on the right hand. So yeah, why they love shit is real and if anybody hear it, just don't play with it because mos folks don't know
when they snap, they snap, they don't. Don't play with nobody's heart, and certainly don't be in a marriage for that long if you wanted to play with it. And she didn't even get the fingers, didn't even get snapped by the husband. The fingers got snapped by the boyfriend.
So yeah, God damn Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, heal us.
Oh oh my god, that's crazy.
Okay, So that that was a pretty detailed update.
So back to my listeners. Man, like she said, you can't play with love.
And you know how people just automatically always think, you know, women go crazy behind love, you know, and we do some crazy things. No, man, people put their heart. That's people periods. Some men that will really kill for their wives, is women that will kill for their husbands, and then it's people that will kill for their own heart. I put my heart on the line for you. I gave you my everything, and some people just can't take it.
They can't take betrayal of you know, they can't take heartbreak, they can't take a partner cheating on them. When you put your trust, your everything into someone and you feel like it's reciprocated and that person.
Would never do you wrong, and then they do, you know, some people snap.
Some people snap, and like she said, she was held at gunpoint because her friend was lying on her. You have to be careful these days, all days, but be careful. There's a lot of bold people out there and a lot of people who just don't give a fuck. And they feel like once they lost the love of their life,
they don't have anything else. They don't have anything to live for, especially when you put your everything in one person, because that's what you have to do for somebody to destroy you, you have to give them everything to destroy you. And I'm pretty sure that husband and boyfriend boyfriend both felt destroyed by her, like the girl who wrote me, Like she said in the first story, them men both loved her, both treated her like gold.
And her husband she really meant what she said.
Her husband will kill her if he found out, and she knows that first hand. Because he was ready to kill her, kill the friend because the wife then gave him a fucking alibi and he pulled up on a friend.
All right, shame with you. I got you at gunpoint. Now. You know what I'm saying. It's crazy as wrong as it is.
That's all the wife's fault. You know what I'm saying. Like, damn, y'all, that's the wife's fault. Love can make you crazy, man. It doesn't have to be that hard.
It doesn't.
All you how to do is say, look, I'm not happy, communicate. Let somebody know. When people are in love, they are in love. You gotta let somebody know if you ain't feeling the same. You always want to be on the same page in a marriage, Yes, in a relationship, but in a marriage, be on the same page. That's a covenant. That's a contract that y'all signed. That's a lot.
You know what I'm saying. Y'all are binded legally.
You can't just walk away from a marriage like you can walk away from a boyfriend, a relationship, a friendship. You understand what I'm saying. So y'all just be careful out there. That was That was a sad update. But I hope that this actually teaches her friend or her ex friend, you don't play with love next time. You could lose your life. Good thing that you lost one hand. You're walking around all nubby now, but you know what I'm saying, You could have lost your fucking life.
Hold up, hold up.
I know this shit getting good, but listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen. Cay moving on to the next story. Okay, this is not a voice, No, this is written. It says Jess. This isn't really mess, but more of a young and just asking for advice from somebody who's been through it. So I'm twenty three and I'm planning a
big move. I just got out of a long abusive relationship that lasted four years, and prior to that, I had been in three other relationships that lasted a year and a half, three years, and two years. So if that tells you anything, it should tell you I'm not the best at being alone. So that brings me to my question, how do I go about being alone and learning to love and accept myself. I plan on moving out of state by myself in an attempt to jumpstart my life and to stop being afraid of the world.
But yet again, I'm young and I've literally never done anything alone. I've lived in the same city, same state, my whole life. Thank you in advance, Jess.
I love you. I don't always like what you say, but damn you do.
Keep it real, and to be honest, I sure do be needing to hear it much respect. I've been a fan since I was too young to be watching you. By the way, yeah, girl, I've been and out of relationships since I was thirteen. You ain't gotta tell me. My mama already has. This is the reason I'm trying to run away. Okay, okay, wow, I tell you what you don't need to be doing running away. It's okay, okay. I love how you keep saying my whole life. You only have been here for twenty three years, girl, some
of my whole life. My whole life. Oh shit, you're a guy. My bad, because I'm trying to see something real quick.
I don't want to Oh no, okay, you're a girl. You're a girl, okay, all right, all right, all right, but you look like a tom girl. My bad, my bad, all right, Yeah, you're.
Only twenty three. Boo, you don't need to be running away looking for no damn love. That's not what you need to do. You want me to give you advice on how to be alone. You just have to learn how to love yourself, you know, because if you're always with somebody, you never get to know yourself. That's how I know you don't know yourself. You know you're trying to figure out right now how to be alone. And you're only twenty three. You know what I'm saying. You're
just the lover. That's what it is. You know, you're a hopeless romantic. If you don't know what that is. You know, you give romance a try, no matter what it is, who it is, what level you are in your life, the status that you are, whatever, You're always willing to give love a try, and you always see the good in people. You got to give me more clarity, though, Why are these relationships only lasting, you know, but so long?
And I honestly feel like the three year and the two year was all right, and then you know you got out of a four year. I mean, it ain't like you had that. If you add all that up, that's nine years. It ain't like you had nine relationships in nine years. You had three in nine years. You know, some people double your age been in thousands of relationships. Some people younger than you have been in thousands of relationships.
They can't even count on their hands how many people, how many partners they had, you know what I mean. So I think that you're being a little bit too hard on yourself, but you're also trying to grow up too fast, and you got your whole life ahead of you.
What do you want to do? What are your dreams? What are your goals?
Like?
Fuck love? Right now? Like what do you want to do?
Because the quicker you figure out what you want to do, which is something that you don't want to rush, but just put your focus there, you may fall into like your career or which your lifelong goal may be, and you may find your person in that journey, you know. So you have to focus on what you're going to do with the rest of your life other than love. You know what I'm saying, Because that shit gonna come.
It's gonna come, just like you shouldn't chase being rich, Never chase being rich, never chase love, you know what I'm saying, Because all that shit just comes when you're already doing everything right, you know, and what you're not doing right right now is self love. You're not loving on yourself. So that's just easy, babe. You just got to figure out what you want to do in your life. Talking about career wise, what are you good at, what's gonna make you like? What's your passion?
You know?
And if everything comes back to love, then you should be a goddamn therapist. You should do something that gears to love. You could be a love doctor. You could be like Hits. You could set people up, you know what I'm saying, and you can do that. You can be a relationship specialist.
You can do that.
You've been in three of them, one abusive. I don't know about the other two or how they ended, but I think you'll be fine.
I think you'll be great.
Don't think too hard about it, baby girl, Hit me back, update me love you. If you love me, you'll listen to this commercial and then we'll be right back. Okay, And before we end this episode today, we got one left one update.
This is actually one of my favorite stories. Man.
This girl was really stressed out about you know, she had married somebody, and she married you. Know, she was married to her wife for a while, and the wife cheated on her, made a baby with a guy who didn't want nothing to do with the baby, and then so she wanted to run back to our wife because she knew that this girl wouldn't let her be just out there with a baby by herself and just see her, you know, try to raise the baby on her own.
She loved the wife and the baby so much that she has taken on the role of the parent of the baby. You know, she's the baby's mom, and the girl cheated on her again, you know, just well, you know it. It was a very messy situation. She started using using her just for the baby and shit like that, you know what I'm saying. So it was definitely betrayal. And this is the update that she left us. Yo.
Just I couldn't type nothing because I'm driving to work this morning, but I wanted to say thank you dog.
Like this gonna sound kind of like out of box, but like, I really been feeling like I couldn't go to nobody with that shit for the longest time, and I just been kind of feeling like I'm in my own space with it, you know, and I've been holding that shit in so like it felt really good to get it out and to have you hear it and like genuinely care, like I appreciate that, and I know that you know, this podcast means a lot to a
lot of people. So I really just wanted to say thank you for hearing me, man, like I'm gonna cry dog for real and just making me feel like I'm not I'm not alone all the time and this shit, man.
Thank you damn it. Y'all know my ass is a cry baby too. I'm sitting there, I started fucking and this was a tear jerker before she even said she was about to cry. I really do appreciate you, baby girl, I really really do thank you for trusting me with
your story. You know what I'm saying, because this is a platform where you have to be strong enough to exposure you're you know, whatever you're going through, you know, because other people are listening, and we let people intell our lives into our lives, and you just never know what somebody can do with your information. So I always thank everybody for us for even trusting me to help fix their mess.
I love you too, I really love you, like seriously.
I love everybody who I help, you know, even the ones I can't help, I love them too, you know, because that's what everybody needs, you know, just just fucking love, love those big hugs.
Even the toughest people.
They need to just break down and cry and just scream, you know, just go in your yard and scream and then get it all out.
Everybody needs a release.
Man.
This world it could fuck you up if you let it. You know, it's cruel. This world ain't like what it used to be, you know. So I'm here. I'm always here, baby, So even if you want to, if you got some old mess, let me know. She also left us with this piece of great news. She typed this part. We just went today to officially fil for our divorce. The process would only take a few weeks and I'll be moving out of state for a month or so for work. Thank you, Jess for giving me support when I needed it.
I'm updating you like you my bestie or something. Look at my foolish ass, girls, stay blessed. You ain't foolish at all. No, you ain't foolish. You would be foolish if you was still in that marriage. And I'm proud of you, proud of you. I'll be loving how with my motherfucking people.
Man.
I love it, I love it, and I love you, and I love every listener. And make sure you tune into Carefully Reckless each and every Wednesday, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, iHeart make sure anywhere you get your podcast, that's where you can find me at And then my deepest Pam voice.
Peace.
Ta class Man.
Can't Fully Reckless is a production of iHeart Radio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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