We are approaching the end of the Tower of Nero… so naturally, it’s time for a full out battle. Apollo beats up some IT guys. All of New York can be destroyed with a single button. Nero gives another evil villain monologue, but this time it’s on Zoom. We wish this was written a few years later because Nero definitely would have had a funny background. Apollo confronts Nero in the throne room. Meg fights back, Nero can’t find his remote, and Nico once again comes to save the day. Also, Nero can’t...
Nov 13, 2023•53 min•Season 3Ep. 38
In these chapters, Apollo makes it to the titular Tower of Nero, and nothing goes according to plan. Nero’s tower is boring, and his plan is evil. He gives a brilliant villain monologue which begins with blaming his mother, and ends with him announcing his dream job: daddy to everyone! Then he makes a child cut off Lu’s hands. We discuss the surprisingly deep gender commentary about fathers. Then Apollo gets to spend some time dreaming in a fancy jail cell. Him and Lu actually bond and then enac...
Nov 06, 2023•45 min•Season 3Ep. 37
Trogs! Trogs! Trogs! This week we meet the Troglodytes. It’s also our Halloween episode! But first, we must fight the cows. Where’s Frank when you need him to murder cows?? Manasa makes the bold claim that all cows are socialists. Let us know if you understand her logic because Erin does not. Apollo and friends escape the cows and travel to the home of Nico’s new best friends, the Troglodytes, aka, the cave dwellers. Erin thinks that the Trogs should look like frogs. We get really sidetracked by...
Oct 30, 2023•51 min•Season 3Ep. 36
It’s time to go back to camp! Apollo and Meg take a ride with the gray ladies and end up back at Camp Half-Blood. Apollo invented the “honey he gay” meme according to Rick. We get to see our favorite goth son, Nico!! Mr. D and Nico are bros now. Apollo has some visions of Python, who apparently knows chess. He probably plays it with Nero. We also get a dramatic backstory about the arrow of Dodona, who is just a little branch with big dreams. Then, it’s time to go fetch our fav billionaire, Rache...
Oct 23, 2023•55 min•Season 3Ep. 35
We’re starting the fifth of final book of Trials of Apollo! It starts off strong with a train ride and murder. We don’t like Lu because she murdered an innocent snake man with a wife. Lu does help Apollo and Meg escape from Nero’s clutches, though, so we’ll give her that. We encourage the youth to talk about people behind their backs. Then, we get to see our favorite… the queen of our hearts… Sally Jackson. Who is THRIVING. Sally and Paul feed and clothe Apollo and Meg. Then Apollo gets to push ...
Oct 16, 2023•50 min•Season 3Ep. 34
We are joined by the infamous Sammie, our editor, who is also Erin’s little sister. She shares evidence that Erin was an evil child. Erin defends her behaviors because she was a budding actress. We go through lots of your Lightning bolt questions and sweet audio messages - thank you everyone always for your support! Topics this episode include: adopting demigods, typical CHP bloopers, optimal face placement, and sacrificing Jason for shoes. We also talk a bit about the SAG AFTRA strike and how w...
Oct 09, 2023•56 min
New band name dropped: Five Unicorns of the Apocalypse. This week, we’re wrapping up this book with the final battle. They have it out with Tarquin and, FINALLY, godly help shows up. Artemis/Diana is here to save the day, and also stop Apollo from turning into a zombie. Also, Frank is alive! We discuss the merits of Captain Underpants. Reyna quits her job and gets another job. Manasa comes down hard against Lavinia. We review the book as a whole, and Manasa makes some final predictions for the f...
Sep 25, 2023•1 hr 3 min•Season 3Ep. 33
A LOT is going on in these chapters. And in our brains. Manasa is ready to kill Rick for potentially killing Frank. Apollo and Meg make their way back to camp to fight in the battle. We think the triumvirate’s monsters are kind of lame. They’re all just lil guys. Yet still, things are not looking good for Camp Jupiter. Apollo meets up with Ella and Tyson to do the god-summoning ritual. Nothing happens. So instead, Apollo joins the battle. Frank challenges the emperors to a duel. Then…. he explod...
Sep 18, 2023•55 min•Season 3Ep. 32
Apollo, Reyna, and Meg climb up Sutro Tower, and we learn the tale of how Apollo really sucks. He had his ex murdered for cheating on him!! We provide you all with a deep dive on Dean Martin. He had a colorful divorce history. We learn that doves were the Twitter of Ancient Greece. We meet the god of silence, Harpocrates, a child that Apollo bullied. They manage to get what they came there for — they take Harpocrates’s last breath in the jar of the Sybil (apparently they were in love?). ————————...
Sep 11, 2023•58 min•Season 3Ep. 31
This week, Camp Jupiter prepares for battle, and Apollo heads out on his quest (for love?). Meg and Apollo have a sweet bonding moment. Apollo drools over Reyna some more. He sneaks out with Don and Lavinia to see some dryads and Peaches, and naturally, has to perform a remix of his hours-long Jason song (10 minute version…sad dryad version). Apollo, Reyna, and Meg head towards Sutro Tower and Apollo tries to ask Reyna out. It doesn’t go well for him. However, it goes great for Reyna, who laughs...
Sep 04, 2023•54 min•Season 3Ep. 30
Apollo’s memories are not a good look for him this episode. He remembers what he did to the Sybil. He’s also slowing dying from Zombie Scratch. Hazel, Lavinia, Meg, and Apollo make the worst group project. Tarquin is basically Skeletor. They get into Tarquin’s Tomb and see his huge undead army. Meg fully tries to take on Tarquin by herself. Lavinia’s manubalista is kind of annoying. We discover that Python has legs!!! We give you a deep dive on the etymology of the Python. We then answer some fu...
Aug 28, 2023•57 min•Season 3Ep. 29
We are in peak form this episode. Manasa blames the heat. Erin has AC, but she did have the plague while recording this. We reflect on how Apollo stopped climate change by giving the sun some therapy. Perhaps we should try that out. But it’s time for a funeral. Manasa thinks that we should be done grieving by now. Lester is an Aries. We meet up with Tyson and Ella. Ella does tattoos now. Then we go burn Jason!!! Wolf Mama shows up to have a chat with Apollo. Apollo takes a nap and we get some ba...
Aug 21, 2023•53 min•Season 3Ep. 28
Time to start a new book! Meg and Apollo are on their way to Camp Jupiter, with Jason’s coffin in tow. But of course, they have some run ins with monsters on their way. Namely, Zombie Gollem. We meet a new character, Lavinia, and reconnect with some old ones (remember Don the Faun?). They make it to camp, and Apollo has to break the news about Jason. He decides to do this in song form, singing the longest song ever. He really is Rachel Berry. At least it wasn’t a rap song, right? ———————————————...
Aug 14, 2023•56 min•Season 3Ep. 27
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, The Horse. You were our favorite. We will never know how you use a phone. We are joined by returning guest Robert of @TheDamMemePage to discuss the final chapters of The Burning Maze. These chapters are SAD. First, the horse dies. Then, we reunite with Leo. This is actually the saddest part of this book. We low key get choked up. And then proceed to make too-soon jokes and ruin it. We talk about all the Riordanverse deaths, and also water features in homes (it’s a no f...
Jul 31, 2023•1 hr 7 min•Season 3Ep. 26
These chapters are FULL of riddles and puzzles. Erin loves a good word puzzle. Manasa has strong feelings against Boggle. We start off with a fun audio message from our wonderful listener Coffee, who defends Southern California against Rick’s wrath. Then, Apollo, Meg, and Grover have to face the challenge of crossword puzzles. Apollo messes up and almost gets them all killed (classic). He has a nice little chat with Helios, who wants Medea dead. Now. Then, Medea shows up and is ready to kill the...
Jul 24, 2023•45 min•Season 3Ep. 25
Well, we did it. We kept the biggest Riordanverse spoiler from Manasa. She is SHOCKED in this one. We’re processing a lot of emotions. We’re joined by Darien and DJ from Muses of Mythology to witness Manasa read this for the first time. Jason, Apollo, Piper, and Meg face off with Caligula. Even The Horse can’t make these chapters fun. A prophecy is fulfilled, and Rick kills off his first main character. Somehow we end up talking about Bianca again in this, too. Be sure to check out Muses of Myth...
Jul 17, 2023•1 hr 13 min•Season 3Ep. 24
THE RETURN OF THE HORSE!!!! He has his own evil horse agenda!!! But we still don’t know how he talks on the phone. Jason, Piper, Meg, and Apollo sneak onto the yachts (and promptly get caught) (where are the orcas when you need them???). We lose the plot a little discussing the Pandai and their furriness. The team splits up, and unfortunately for everyone, there is more singing as combat thanks to Piper and Apollo. We get some more tea on the Piper/Jason breakup. Then, Apollo finds Caligula’s sp...
Jul 10, 2023•51 min•Season 3Ep. 23
Time to find Jason Grace! Piper, Apollo, and Meg make it out of the maze, nearly burned to death. Apollo dreams of Caligula. Caligula has killer outfits (or lack thereof). We learn a bit more about Meg’s heritage, and then discuss Caligula’s plan. Caligula and Commodus are both much funnier than Nero. Nero would have a boring PowerPoint presentation for his plan. They head on over to Jason’s school and get the TEA on him and Piper. Manasa is shocked to learn that Piper dumped Jason (good for her...
Jul 03, 2023•53 min•Season 3Ep. 22
Both Erin and Manasa cannot breathe thanks to allergies this week. Or is it that we’re method acting and are in the maze with Apollo? The burning maze was within us all along. Turns out tax evasion was what got Tristan McLean, not PTSD. With Piper’s help, they steal a car and then head over to the maze entrance. They meet a fun looking large ear creature. In the maze, the gang finds themselves with an old enemy - Medea!!! Girlboss! She has dragons and also the essence of her father, Helios. So t...
Jun 26, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 21
This week we meet Erin’s new favorite character: The Horse. Not just any horse, The Horse. He can talk on a phone. We’re not sure how. Apollo, Grover, and Hedge blow up Macro’s Military surplus store. Hedge broke the mold for satyrs. Why is he so violent?! We learn the name of the emperor, Caligula. Caligula probably had a mug that said “Horse Daddy” on it. Meg tells us more about her background, and Manasa is disappointed she’s not a time child. They meet up with Piper, who is clearly fighting ...
Jun 19, 2023•50 min•Season 3Ep. 20
HAPPY 100TH EPISODE! This one is a bit shorter as we’re just starting a new book, so if you want some more content go check out our 100th episode Instagram Live (@camphalfpod). It’s been so fun and we’re so lucky to have damaged your ears for 100 hours. We find Apollo, Meg, and Grover in the labyrinth, and it’s not going too well. They’re attacked by strixes, and then finally make it to Grover’s base camp and meet some dryads. We also learn that Coach Hedge’s first name is Gleeson, furthering th...
Jun 12, 2023•39 min•Season 3Ep. 19
Time to finish this book! We wrap our book up with final Commodus confrontation, and then a brand new prophecy in the form of a Shakespearean sonnet. Manasa gives us her own interpretation of the prophecy. Erin thinks that authors should stop killing animals and actually kill people instead (Justice for Heloise). The gang analyzes the prophecy, and then Leo sets off. Meg and Apollo have to summon a cloven guide for this trip west - and it’s none other than our old pal, Grover! ——————————————————...
May 29, 2023•47 min•Season 3Ep. 18
These are some intense chapters - Apollo and Meg confront Trophonious and receive a prophecy. They also trauma bond and it’s honestly really cute. Erin suggests that Trophonious is like Luke because of daddy issues and thievery. All Luke’s have daddy issues. Then Apollo murders Nannette. We mourn her presence. Peaches and his lil friends come to the rescue. They then return to the Waystation to find it under attack - Apollo charges into battle and ends up coming face to face with his lover-turne...
May 22, 2023•43 min•Season 3Ep. 17
Deja vu much? This week we’re joined by Monster Donut’s other half, Emily! She is a classics officionado, and we’re thrilled to ask her ALL the questions. We learn a lot about mystery cults, and just how absolutely bonkers the cave of Trophonious was. In these chapters, Apollo and Meg head off to the cave to get their prophecy. They encounter some evil Yales and then Apollo essentially gets drunk and plunges into the depths. Unfortunately, Apollo isn’t the one to get possessed by the prophecy gh...
May 15, 2023•1 hr 16 min•Season 3Ep. 16
We start off this one by welcoming you all to our mob. Thank you for your creative answers. This episode, chaos reigns!! Rick steals from Star Wars in this one. This is a quest with three Han Solos. Apollo comes down hard against slavery. Meg rides an ostrich. Peaches returns! Commodus brings out all the stops in the arena. These chapters are very violent. Georgina is rescued and gives us a new prophecy! Apollo learns he has more children than he thought. We discuss the portrayal of the Hunters ...
May 08, 2023•57 min•Season 3Ep. 15
This week we are joined by the amazing Phoebe from Monster Donut podcast!! We learn all about Heloise and Abelard, and their namesakes. We get to see the most iconic flashback of this book - Commodus’s death. Apollo commits what he believes is his first murder. Plagues don’t count. We rave about how good Commodus’s death scene is. Phoebe is way more knowledgeable about these books than us. Then, the most chaotic combo possible - Meg, Apollo, and Leo - set out on a quest to Commodus’s lair and tr...
May 01, 2023•1 hr 3 min•Season 3Ep. 14
This episode is brought to you by AI-generated haikus. In these chapters, we get some background on Trophonious and Agamethus (aka cheese ghost). We also learn about Commodus, the emperor bad guy of this book. He is confirmed as a furry, since he’s Roman and wears lion skin. Then, Calypso and Apollo head to the zoo to rescue some griffins. Manasa’s favorite character, the talking arrow, makes a return. We give you ostrich facts that you didn’t ask for. Meg and Apollo are reunited!! Choo choo. #F...
Apr 24, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 13
Ever wondered how to create an angry mob? Us too. We invite you all to join our mob. This week, we make the switch from 4 to 6 chapters at a time, and it’s great. Waystation is confirmed as a lesbian house. We learn about Georgina and all the strange happenings in Indianapolis. Cheese ghost is still here. Apollo is an oblivious king. Leo and Calypso are bickering, and the internet makes it sound worse than it is in the text. Except Leo’s dialogue - that’s definitely as bad as the internet thinks...
Apr 17, 2023•47 min•Season 3Ep. 12
This week we start a new book - The Dark Prophecy. Manasa makes some prophecies for the plot. Calypso, Leo, and Apollo are the new trio for this book. Rick has no love for the state of Indiana. Festus is still the problematic king we know and love. We learn about the headless blemmyaes. A headless ghost leads them to a magic house that is clearly owned by lesbians. There is too much interpretive dance in this book already. ————————————————————— SUPPORT US ON PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/camp...
Apr 10, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 11
Percy is here to save the day - by insulting villains (he’s just like us!). Apollo faces down a giant statue of himself. He was his own enemy, all along. He’s still a narcissist, though. We’re both not sure how we feel about this ending. Leo and Calypso finally make their return, and everyone punches Leo. Including Chiron. We talk about our favorite moments from this book, and our least favorite (two words: ant mama). Manasa makes some predictions for the next books and then we wrap up with some...
Mar 27, 2023•37 min•Season 3Ep. 10
