Sue + Ava

I'm really looking forward to this. It should be fabulous. They're two fabulous ladies. A little girl, a teenager too fast. A little girl, You'll be a real pain to the ass. You'll go to school and act so cool and do all the teenage stuff. Little girl, you're not a little girl long a. This is too I'm not going to say her age, but she is fun. She's funky, very fresh. With Grammy, nothing can be described as boring. You know.

Sometimes I'd say things and do things just for the outrageousness of the pido, so we could get a lot out of it. Grammy has a photographic memory. If you give her the name of a song, she can sing a song that goes with that word should wed Grammy, alright, just don't embarrass me after that interruption. My best friend's name is Lily, Lily, Lily of the Valley, Lily Lily, Let's red BALLI zupp keep your eyes on the road, etcetera. I've been wearing the same perfume for forty years and

she always loved it. So before she went to camp, I took my perfume dad to a house and I sprated all over hot pillows that she was taking to camp. So when she got to camp, she would spell me. She is really funny. Everything she says is like, uh, there's always a joke because she's very musical. She's been a very very important part of my life. She's the best and I love her. Nobody has given me the joy and by life that Ava has given me. Growing up.

I guess they had a really small bladder. So we would wander into bathrooms and we made it like a game. It was like, oh does this I was really small, so it's the hook low enough that I could reach it. It never was are there flowers? Is it nice lighting? And then it just became a thing and we're like, yeah, we're going to write a book. On the best bathrooms in New York, the best bath and the worst, and we took notes and we rated them from one to ted. Yeah.

Grammy famously likes to kidnap me, so she would just capture me after school and we would like do debaucherous things. I would take Gavid during the day. We rode up to yachters and we this bathroom looked like it was over the bridge. Rebepperave it felt like you were on a ship in the middle of the river. Yeah, I mean it was gorgeous and the view was incredible. Grammy has kind of always been with me. We would do like cooking classes together. She would take me to dance lessons,

and we've always been extremely close. She taught me to play pick up six and jacks to make sure I went to camp with all of the necessary skills. We did all different things. We went to Butterfly World. We went to play a miniature golf. Yeah. But now in the pandemic, it's just helping the pandemic. I haven't sea. Yeah. Have I seen you once? I mean I've seen you since March, right. Yeah. Well, she came to the house twice this summer and she took a few things. She

wears some of my old Yeah, her old clothes. He has like these like old scars that will tie into talk. And I used to always wear a belt and a shirt with the collar up. I look like Rizzo from Greece. Terrific. And I love the relationship between the grandmother and that thing with the rating of the bathrooms. That's the funniest thing I ever heard. Every time she opens him out, I think to myself, as soon as this thing is over, I'm having her here for lunch. I mean, she is

just like, invite me, Allen, you're a good cook. Okay. I'm reading these part titles, and part one says Ellie Grammy Graham. I wonder what that is, Grammy. Her use of social media could possibly be characterized as her miss use of social media now that she's taken to Instagram and Facebook. Sometimes she accidentally live streams I'm like fun over a dress rewa. So the first time that happened, I get a text from my best friend Sam. She was like, get on Facebook right now, Grammy's live streaming.

So we're all on Facebook. All of my friends and my cousins were all texting. We're like, who's gonna tell her, I'm just hearing a baptist though. Yeah, you kept like tapping the button. It was like click click click. You were just sitting there and then you put like a filter on yourself. I was crying. I don't have any recollection that live. Same incident became the inspiration for Eli Grammy Graham, an Instagram account my cousins and I made

for a Grandma. It's all about the face, that's the trouble. It's all about the base that's the trouble. It's at at that the base that's the trouble. But told me, I mean, it was basically about my grandma, like all the ridiculous stuff she does and all of the accidental selfie she takes, and when she sings rap songs in the car to like melodies and niche is so confusing and it was really never meant to be anything past.

Like my family and my friends, it's kind of all those things that's like so quintessentially Grammy to everyone that just it makes you laugh or at least makes you smile a little bit. Even before we made her this account, all my friends knew Grammy, Like none of my friends call her Sue. Or Susan. It's all Grammy. It's like a nickname rather than being like my name for my grandma. It's like, oh, hey, Grammy is Oh Grammy's gonna pick you up. It's not like, oh, is your Grammy gonna

pick you up? She never knew I had a real name, but until a friend the Beryl's, asked her, do you know what Grammy's real name is? She said, Grabby. She had one friend that really thought I was a great mother. After my fourth grandchild was born, my husband, for her anniversary, got be a tennis bracelet when he had a little gold baby shoes. Attached to the bracelet at the bottom of the shoe said each kid's day with the date of birth. And Samantha looked at the bracelet. She said

to me, where's my name? And Avis said to it, you're not one of Grammy's children, no child's You're not one of Grammy's childs. That thing is so funny because when I'm answering an email with something, I'm not good. I don't hit the right keys, and my kids keep saying, what are the stupid things are you sending out? You know, we don't know what we're doing. So whatever happens happens, and it's funny. It was adorable, that's so cute. I think that when a child has a relationship like that

with a grandmother, it's like a gift. It really, absolutely, it's a gift. And I tried. I tried to create that kind of a relationship. Of course, my girls are much much younger, so it's better, you know what, because I feel now not that we're grandmother and grandshung with buddies with pounds. We love to be together. They get a kick out of me the stupid things I do. You know, there's there's an expression that we have in

our family. It's like this no no, that usually is involving anything that has to do with electronics, although I tried very hard. Next up, we have part two, the last olive, and the only thing that comes to my mind is a marketining. How would you compare yourself to your grandmother? What would you say is the biggest difference

between the two of you? She was cold as ice. Oh. We used to have dinner every night together, so you know, my mother always putting the olives, pickles, celery, carrots on the table, and there was one of olive left when I went to take it, she took it. My grandmother, if there is one thing left on the table at a restaurant, she always tells me to eat it. She's like, you go for it. I'm not going to take the last one. I never forgot that m after going through

the experience, have your grandmother taking the last olive? What do you think is the most important thing to convey to your own grandchildren? Just love them. I really never wanted to every time I came to the house, boy you something, and give you something, because I didn't want to be known for that. And I know plenty of my friends that with grandmothers, they every time they came to the house, you think that the child was interested in just what did you bring me? What did you

bring me? So I made sure I didn't do that. I mean, I certainly didn't suffer from lack of gifts, but I didn't make it an odd gooing. Uh an expectation? Right? Okay, say yea. Not only do you do that, you finish my sentences. You know, I have to say something about the last alive. They used to say, if a single girl each the last thing, she's gonna be an old maid? Did you ever hear that? But that's never hurt. You

never heard that? Oh big, you know, I tell you the decade between our soul and there's a lot of things that got lost anyway. But the relationship is so cute. It's really adorable, and it really is. And you hope for a relationship like that with granddaughters and she and she's right about not bring any gift every time. Don't you know a lot of grandmothers that say, I'm going to the grandchildren, I have to get something for No,

I do I know? Women. I have to tell you there's nothing I could buy my grandchildren that I would know that they want number one or that they don't have, which is unfortunate me. Listen, I have a granddaughter who's eleven who wants a broken leg. I think I'm gonna buy that. No, no, you have to get on a waiting list. Now, listen, don't go anywhere. We're gonna do a quick commercial and I know you're gonna come right back because we'll be looking for you. And there's nothing

like Jewish guilt. Next up is part three, Going her Own Way? So how did you meet Poppy? A friend of mine? When we graduated high school, went first summer job at this company answering phones, putting in orders and modeling the swimsuits. And she liked it so much, and she thought her bosses were so nice that she never

went to college. So I called them and my husband's partner, he was married, so he's the one that did the high you ring And I had met my husband yet you know, I would be on the spot to come in the following day his part Yeah, she had a rocking bod. And at that center clock, this dude struts in and he starts singing A foggy day in London Town. I said to myself, who is this? And there he was. Whenever I get to say, like, oh my grandma, Yeah

she was a bathing suit model. For like a little bit of time, we're like, she's a bathing suit model, I was like, yes, model bathing suits my grandpa made on then. I mean, who knew he'd be my future huts But I used to stay there because I had a crush on him, and I would take a later training back to Lord Beach on Friday afternoon so I could stay another twenty minutes to the office with him. One night, I stayed later to model some suits for them,

and then he took me for dinner. On the way out, I broke my heel of my shoe and he gave me, I think thirty dollars, so he said, his money, and go buy a pair of shoes because she's coming to work tomorrow. You need a pair of shoes. I had to think not to vomit. I was so nervous. He was a great combination of niceness and thoughtfulness and its sexy. It was a great combination. You know, it's like salt

but pepper. You know, it worked very well together. I felt that it was something real, but I didn't know what real really was. I was trying to fight it. They was thirteen a half years older than I was at nineteen, a man of thirty two and a half. I made my friends thought I was going out with my father. Yeah, she was nineteen, I mean to be exact, I was eighteen really when I met him, and he was in the garb and Center, and that it wasn't

a distinguished career like being a doctor a lawyer. You know, that's how people thought. You know. I was crazy about him, and his time went by, I was even more so, but I felt that there was no future there. I mean, I can't marry him. Makes that he's not marriage material for me. So what changed your mind then about Poppy being marriage material? I was going with him over two years, and I saw that I didn't like anybody else. Finally, my mother said to me that summer looks susan either ship.

We'll get up the pot. That's it. You can't keep going like this. You know, there wasn't the pill they got. My mother was scared at death. I would be coome pregnant. You know, you got married to January before your college graduation, and didn't your father make you get your maiden name on your diploma right because he thought the marriagement at last. So you never know, you know, And we had a very long, loving marriage, so you never can tell. Oh, he found like a really nice guy. And look how

generous he was. He gave him money for para shoes in those years of para shues for thirty dollars had to be Jimmy Choo, something really of I wasn't jump from a a s BEC. I don't know a few people remember that. God, I remember a s Bec. It was a shoe store chain and it was modern, comfortable shoes, but at thirty dollars, my god, you would have brought three pair and they expect So he was a generous guy. I say, these two Ava and Grahammy I'm enjoying this relationship.

And the grandmother is a funny lady. She's a lot of fun. She's a oh, I I haven't expression who you know what? Who did? She's a yeah, okay, I don't know. If you need a few young girls know what? Who did? It's like I still say that read it really yeah, okay, okay, Rida Part four us coming up. I see that it says making your own money. This is something all of them have to learn how to do.

When I got married, I still was in college and I was a speech in audiology major, and I really liked it that they gave us patience to take on the outside. We visited certain people at hospitals. Do ever see the movie Maudy with Ernest Borgnard. Well, his mother had a stroke and she was in Safe Vincent's hospital in the city, and she was one of my patients

that I had to go see. What's so we and I was offered a job at Rusk Institute and My husband did not want me to take the job because he was afraid I'd fall in love with a doctor. And he kept saying that to me, and and it was close to where we lived, and I really I studied hard and I really wanted to work at it. I said, I fell in love with you. Why would I fall in love with the doctor. He says, well, you've got to have a baby, sued, And that's how we thought. So I didn't say I'd have a baby

worked too, you know. So that was the end of my profession. I feel like it's definitely worth noting that all of the women in our family value education very highly. I'm the fourth generation to be going to college woman, and so I mean it's a pretty big deal. Like it's more about having the passion for learning. Grammy, you'll call me even at the beginning of every semester. What books are you reading in your classes? Like, I'm an English major, so it's all this stuff. It's a lot

of feminist literature that I've been reading recently. It wanted us something I really, uh, black the other side of the fence with this by day. What do you mean you're on the other side of the fence were already. So what does that mean? I don't know. I mean I believe in equal pay. Uh. My nephew graduated Harvard Law School about Ted's years ago, and more than half of those law students were wipid. Right really made me

feel good. It really wore my heart. Yeah, I think that Grammy as a woman, I think she's definitely more progressive than others in terms of like feminism. I don't think she would call herself necessarily a feminist, but I think that Grammy has always been someone to champion women doing what they want, not relying on a husband or a boyfriend to fulfill all of your needs. And I mean it was very deeply ingrained in my mom that

you work and you make your own money. And now I'm making a little bit of my own money, and it feels really good. Having money of your own gives you a sense of independence. You know. That reminds me of a story when I graduated from college and I got my first job teaching. My mother said to me, You're gonna have to pay rent now. And I was horrified, I'm going to live at home with you and Daddy and I have to pay rent. My mother said, it's

only fair you have to pay rent. And about a week before I got married, my mother came to me with an envelope and she said, this is yours, and I opened it up and there was a tremendous check in there. Then all the rent you pay, she says, I'm your mother, I know you, and I know where that money would have god, And we had a very nice little nest egg from that money for one one to do three three? What do I think? I'm believe we're gonna say time to go commercial, commercial and we'll

be right back. We can never sink I talked too fast. No, you were behind me? Read are you still there? Oh? Yeah? Part five is coming up. Grammy's Lessons something everyone should adhere to. Grammy. What's the difference between being a mother and a grandmother? For you? I don't have to worry every night. Did you do your homework? What's your homework? Where is your homework? What's this? To pick up your clothes? Put back your clothes? Did you go to the bathroom today?

I was always a big maxature. My kids went to the bathroom with that. You still do do that with me, By the way, Just to make that clear, that's not where the mother grandmother line is. It's not really worrying day by day. It's just it's like eating ice cream every day without having to eat the spinach. It's pure joy.

When I was growing up, she was always with me, like it was always she would pick me up from school, or she would take me somewhere and we would go to chuck e cheeses together or eat like ice cream sundays in bed. Eventually I was like, oh, this isn't normal. What was like? Oh yeah, like I saw Grammy today, like she brought me to a cooking class or something, And people like, oh yeah, Like I see my grandparents like once a year or like once every couple of months.

And I still don't know many kids whose grandparents are in there every day live. You know. I call her most of the time, but she does call me occasionally, And when I get those phone calls, it's like a girl waiting for a boyfriend that she's been dying for him to call her, slacked by hot skips beats when she calls me. By the way, I passed a chuck e cheese today. You did is a big chucky cheese. I swear to God, we never ate there. I just want to make that very clear that we never ate

at check e Cheeses. We just played the games. So we would go when I was little, and we would rack up tickets and we would just play like hours of ski ball and like hours of games in order to rack up as many points as we could. And we used to walk past the machines at kids left and the tickets would be hanging out. I got to take them. We've got a couple of hundred tickets every day, and so then we would collect them and how many tickets did we end up getting or something like that. Yeah, grammy,

do you still have the tickets? Yes, I do when I diecause they're in the desk of the left hip drawer. All right, thank you, not dad, I'll buy a chuck e cheese and name it Sue's Sue's plays. That's the cutest thing. I love that relationship. And as lucky and the grandmother was, the grand daughter is twice as lucky to have as a grandmother. I have to say. I once said to my husband, I envy my grandchildren the relationship that we have with them, because I never had

that with a grandparents. He he had, he had two very doting grandmothers. His grandmother came to stay with us for a week because she wanted to teach me how to cook. They were terrible cooks in that family. And she said to me, My murther always told me, before the husband comes home, vosh your face, put on a clean vest, and glean him at the dore me that kiss. I only greeted him at the door with a kiss, but I never you know, watch me, okay, were to

get ready. This is a part six learning to slow down and smell the roses because you're mad here forem a sweetheart. Do you think that the women in my generation are missing out on anything? I don't think they have time to step back and smell the flowers like we did. I think life is much more difficult today. The women today wanted all of the law that have to have more than what we had because they need to. It comes to the family, and there's a lot of

stress out there, really is. Yeah, I mean I agree with that. I think that the grammy never she always said that, like working seemed like such a fun kind of thing to do, and I think now that I'm working, I'm trying to step back at least a little bit more and realize that, like everything isn't moving so quickly, Like I'm twenty two now, and it's like, how am I twenty two? And so I'm trying to just like slow down a little bit and smell the roses for

like at least a second, you know. I think, though, it's some way that raising my children and being there and participating in their activities was like my career. Yeah, and then she got to do it double with me, but only the fun parts. Well, I fired you very smart, and I think you have very good common sense, and I think you're a fabulous person thinks. So I could ask you about style, and I could ask you about I really don't talk about Kaska Dustyevsky. We could. We have,

you know, an odgoing relationship. But we talked about a lot of things, and I just I just enjoy you aver fabulous, beyond fabulous. It's grammy. I know we're on the same page. He said. He loves all that we do. I have five grandchildren. I love five grandchildren. But there's always one that you have a little special relationship with. It's a friend, it's it's a loved one. It's not my mother's mother or my father's mother. It's my grandmother,

my friend, my buddy, my confidant. Call Your Grandmother is a production of I Heart Radio and SUPERB Entertainment. The hosts of the show are me Rida Kay and me Alan Bernstein. Grotsky. Created by Meryl Poster, produced and directed by Anasta, with producer Abu Zafar, An associate producer Emily Marinoff, managing producer Lizzy Hoffman, and executive producers are Meryl Poster, Nikki e Tor and Mandes and Mangeshti Okay, let me start again, al Hati Hatika, Door Music and master by

Hamilton Lighthouser and Anasta. Would you expect your grandmother and ninety to be on the podcast noway h