None. Hi, welcome to the latest episode of Mistress Mia's Dungeon. I'm your Hostess, Mistress Mia, and it's just me today with two fabulous people, the Griswolds. I've got Ellen and Clark, and we have been talking, we've been talking about the swinger lifestyle. We've been talking dirty about dirty poop holes and people passing out fucking and all sorts of weird, funny, crazy shit. So Yep, we're going to get down to business.
We're ready, we're ready. All right, so guys, how did you start in this lifestyle and why the fuck would you want to be a swinger? I will let Ellen answer that. All right. Got a wild hair at my ass I guess. Well, visiting the dungeon was a good start and after exploring some fun sexual time in the dungeon for two hours that first time, it just progressed from there and really enjoyed the the kinky side of it. And here we are today. So was it been two years now?
Two years now. Since we first met Mistress Mia. Which is is a weird thing. When people meet us, they're like, y'all like the first year, they're like, y'all have only been doing this for a year. We're like, yeah, They're like, really? Y'all were like old pros. Yeah, we were. Scared. Yeah. We were scared to death at first, but now, you know, really gotten through our groove. Yep, and the stories we have to tell y'all.
You know what I noticed it was like that, that first couple, it was kind of like you bonded with the first couple, yes, and you know, and they seem to like fit you and it was kind of like your great intro. Yes, they were a really good couple. Yeah, they were very patient with us because at first we did soft swap. We did a soft swap first. After. Explain the soft swap they some people don't know.
It that couple was super patient was because we, we even had like two or three dates before we even decided on soft swap. So with soft swap, we decided, we decided for that's where you do oral play and it can either be with just the guy or or the guy and girl. And that night we did guy and girl oral play. And then when it was time for sex, you have sex with your with your partner. So that's soft swap. Am I leaving out anything? With that, no, that's exactly it.
It's like it's oral and then when it comes to penetration, it's with your partner only. OK. And then right after that we had a really great time. And then that was my first time eating out a girl, which was, I don't know better. Yeah, like it's my first time not doing anything with a guy, so I didn't want to do that. And after that, the guy said, do you think you'll possibly do full swap next time? And you're like, yes, we yes. So we did full swap next time and the dungeon was our first.
In the dungeon, yes. Swap. Oh my God, was that the? No, that was that wasn't the incident. No. Are you sure? No, not the first I. Think it was no. That was like another time, but. Are you OK? Yeah, well. Why don't you just tell everybody? Oh, OK. All right. I mean, just just say it. They're not going to know your faces. OK, OK, so you're good. The incident that we are talking about is and and, and Ellen is
right. This was our second time in the dungeon of that couple, which they were a really good couple. They like they were so patient with this. They just, they just let us alone like little puppies because we were lost. Yeah, but so we were into the dungeon. We were. Can I can I just say something wrong? OK, so the cool thing about the husband of our first couple is it was super important for me to watch. But the other girl? Sorry. It's OK. We're going to go back to edit
that. So go ahead. Go ahead. I'm making mark in the the time. Sorry. That's why I put my phone out. Clark and Ellen. Clark and Ellen. You're the motherfucking bris balls. Look at me before you say my name. I'll go, Clark. Clark. This sign that says Clark, that's. What I need? OK, go back to the story there, Ellen do. You want me to start from? Where do you want to start from? You're. OK, you're right. So the guy, the husband of the couple. Yes, thanks for getting hot and
heavy. That was our first time with the full swap and it was important to me that I got to see that in action for the first time where my husband was fucking the other woman. So what I loved, what I loved about the the other husband was he stopped me and he turned me around. He said watch, just just watch them. And so he allowed me to just give all my attention to watching my husband give pleasure to that to the other woman.
It was one of the most memorable experiences so far that that we've had because watching your husband give pleasure to another woman is just an amazing experience, especially since, you know, you get to go home and take that back home. It's yours. You just, you're just letting the other person borrow it for a little while. So anyway I had to share that. OK. All right, that makes me feel bad. Like I'm like, no, I'm there to fuck her. I don't give a shit. Better do my job do do that
required. Very seriously all. Right. Well, good, baby. OK, All right, Well, back to the incident. Oh. Yeah, so. You're in the dungeon. We're in the dungeon and we have Ellen. We've been playing with him for about over an hour. We've been playing for like an hour, hour and a half. And we got Ellen, my wife Ellen, OK, She's over here pointing at her. Me. Did you watch a lot of Christmas Vacation? Fairly not really not.
But anyway, so we, we got her on, we got her on the examination table and things were going and I, I grabbed a butt plug. I do like butt plugs. And so I decided that. The door was open. Insert butt plug into Ellen wasn't thinking anything about it, just so we started playing with her. Well, the other partner, the other man that was there, when Ellen has an orgasm, they're really intense, like super intense. Like it's just like she curls up into a ball and so she has her orgasm.
Like an atomic bomb. Basically, yeah. So she has her orgasm and I'm looking up at, at the, at the other man. He's like, he's got like a, like he just like he just shot a chicken or killed a deer. He's like, uh oh. And I'm like, what's up? He's like, we got a problem. So I walk up and I'm like, what do you mean he goes, it's gone. Like what do you mean it's gone? He goes, no, it's gone. So I'm looking, I'm looking on the ground for this butt plug. I'm like, oh, she just, she spit
it out. And I'm just laying on the on the table, relaxed and in the wonderful ecstasy. So I'm sitting there and she's doing and I and I look over. I'm like, what do you mean it's gone? He goes. It's gone like up insider. He'll it's insider. I'm like oh shit. Clark's pointing upwards. And I'm like. I'm like, I'm like, are you serious? He goes, yeah. And so I walk over to Ellen. I'm like, hey, hey, sweetie, we got a little bit of a problem
here. You sucked up the butt plug and you were like, whatever, I'm cool, whatever. And I'm just like, OK, I said. But I'll tell you what, if we got to go to the emergency room, we're going to go to Alabama. Nobody knows this. Nobody. Knows this in Alabama and so but the other, the other the the woman I was with that she's over there freaking out.
She's pacing back and forth just like, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God. Well, me and the other gentleman we're, we're, I'm retired military and he was in the military for a hot minute. And I'm like, look, we can figure this out guy, what do you want to do? And so I go, baby, I got to reach up in here. So I stuck my finger up Ellen's butt and I could feel it. And it had turned sideways, guys. And I'm like Jesus, God darn. It like a baby.
Like a baby. And so I said, look man, I need you to take your fingers, insert them in her vagina, push down and I'm going to go 3 fingers deep up in there to. Get the bundle. Baby bundle boy down and I'm like, sweetie, you're going to feel a little pressure. And once again she's like, whatever. And so I'm like, all right, let's do it, man. So he gets his fingers in there and I dig my and I got pretty big hands and I get my fingers up in there and I can feel it.
And then he pushes down and I grab it and the damn thing is so slippery. But I, I get a hold and I get a hold of the flange. I'm like, Oh my God, I got it. And I'm like, oh shit, this has got to come out. And I'm like, hold on, baby. Popped that sucker out. Popped it out. Everything was good. And the other woman was, like I said, was patient, back and forth pace and back and forth. And she goes. And that's why I don't do butt stuff. Wow, now. How did that feel, Ellen?
What were you feeling there? I was so euphoric from the orgasm that I was so relaxed. It really wasn't bothering me. That was perfect. She didn't. She didn't move an edge. I was stunned but. Then we got a gift. We got a gift because of that situation. Oh my God, Yeah, you tell him that one. Oh well, it was my birthday. And if the birthday was, that was it Mia's dungeon. We're having a great time. And so that couple was at our birthday party and Mia gave us gave me a wonderful birthday
party. It was everything was just gorgeous and just it was so fun. But anyway, we opened up, I opened up my birthday present and it was a glow in the dark butt plug. And they gigantic blow in the dark butt plug that. Was about 3 inches. It wasn't. Too bad. The diameter, Yeah, yeah. Lengthwise, 3 inches. Girth wise, yeah. OK. And they had an and they had inscribed at the bottom of it the date that it happened and it and it said we have a problem.
We have a problem and that butt plug to this day sits up on our night stand right next to our TV. Yeah, with a with a picture. There's a cool part is that night, It's like a night light at night. When you turn the lights off, there's that butt plug going up there. It's like that commercial we keep, we keep the light on for. You keep the light on for you 'cause it is huge, people. That thing is huge. OK, so we talk about a lot about stuff.
OK, Ellen's gagging on her drink right now, but you know, you did some gagging yourself when when you all decided you're going to have a a little like kind of orgy. On the Oh the Saint, the Saint Patrick's Day Massacre. Yes, there you. Go the Saint Patrick's Day Massacre. There was 6. Of you that was at our house for Saint Patrick's. Day. Yep. So we basically had our first little, I guess we called it an orgy. Yeah, there is. There's an orgy 3. Couples.
Three couples, yeah. Massacre describes something really distinctive. It. Went great and that it ended bad. It ended bad and what happened was is we had some people that drank a lot and some people did edibles. Too much. Too many edibles and I guess when you do edibles, certain things happen to your bowels. And what happened was, is Ellen was going around the room servicing all the guys and just having her good old time. And I'm over there, I'm, I'm doing what I'm supposed to do.
And then one of the girls over there has an orgasm. And then the guy, I am cursed with a nose. I can smell things. And so I'm sitting here having sex with this one lady. And I'm like, what in God's name who shit themselves? And I'm. Like. But I kept on going. I'm like, I cannot be the only one that thinks this. I cannot be the one that smells this. And then so I get dumb. It's the one girl and I call Ellen over. I'm like, hey, come on over.
And Ellen comes over and she gets down to my Dick and she's like, whoa, come to the bathroom. And I'm like, what's wrong? She's like follow me to the bathroom. And so as I'm walking to the bathroom, guys, I look down at my arm and there is a fucking turd on my arm. And if anybody has ever seen that movie, a bachelor party where the guy goes running and screaming in the bathroom to take a shower, that was me. I was, I was like, Oh my God, get it off.
And I'm like, shit, no more. No shit. And then she she goes back out while I'm in the bathroom screaming. They're asking the guys are in the bedroom on our bed saying are you, are they OK in there? They were good. That's OK. You're OK. Oh my God. I. Can't. Sorry. Oh, pause it again. Clark, you're OK. Clark. Clark. Go ahead. Clark just needs a shower. Yeah, you, you said that I just just that need a little bit of time to myself to get things
straightened out and I did. I scrubbed from head to toe, head to toe, scrubbed the skin off my pecker. I'm not going to lie to. You. I really probably thought it was you. No. No, no. Well, it was a tie between which? Which girl it was. And we narrowed it down to we know who it was because when that other couple left, the other couple stayed and we played with her again. And really, if you were to do that, you wouldn't want no way to play with you again. Yeah.
Yeah, so, you know, we're saying all these, we don't want to scare everybody away from from playing around. There's a. Lot no no. Here's the rule. Don't be high and don't be drunk and don't shit on your other partners. And if you think you got to go, you need to go to the bathroom prior because. Yeah, I wonder if a butt plug would have helped. Or that thing could have shot like a Muslim puts his eye out. Seal the tank or. Seal the tank? Well, that person doesn't do
butt stuff, remember? There's benefits to the butt plugs. I don't know. All right, so we talked about stuff. Now we go back to great experiences with your first couple and you go over to their house. You're having a great afternoon in the hot. Tub. In the hot tub. Now I will say this because we talked about this before Ellen and I did over almost two years ago when you really started and you said to me, and I think we're out in the pool at this
point. You said, you know, I really wanted to get into, you know, seeing a woman fuck my husband. I really wanted to see that because I wanted to really explore my bisexuality. And here you were doing it after the age of 40 for the first time. Shit after the age of 40. Five. Yeah, Yeah. So I mean, it was kind of like probably mind blowing. You're like I finally get to do.
It yeah, it's been a lot of fun with that in that area too, with the the first couple was the first time we did, the first time I kissed a girl, first time I ate out a girl, getting any of that good stuff. You get real quiet when you the. First time I got to kiss and eat other girl and now she's just like no no no like she will pin. Like hi my name is Ellen can I eat your pussy? Fingers.
So before you came, Clark, we're sitting here talking, I said, you know, like all fucking swingers, they either got a hot tub, a boat or a or or a pool, you know, because it's all about water. And here's the thing. True. We ain't got no hot tub. We ain't got no boat. Yeah, and. What was the other one again? Yeah, we ain't got no damn pool. I was. Gonna say but you always get into. One, we will find people that have them. Yeah. And that's true. Yeah. Yes. They all.
Everybody. Oh my God, that. Oh my God. It's true. It's like the perverts come out because you're doing water play. That's. True. Oh my God, no, I have. It that way. Before I just blew my mind right there, the people we need to play with, one of them's got a boat and got a hot tub. Somebody got a freaking yeah tell a boat. Tell. The people about our hot tub experience that night. This was the best. Oh wait, this was the funny one. All right, so this.
Was great. This was so fucking great. I love the story. So we're, we're sitting there, we're hanging out in the hot tub and like see a hot tub is like 104° and so and. There's four of them. There's four of us in there and then Ellen and the other lady are getting straight and ready to start to make out and I look. Over we were. Making oh, wait until we were making and I look over at the other gentleman and he's eyes are starting to roll back into his head and I'm like he starts
wobbling. I'm like oh crap, man. So I jump up grab him and I'm just like trying to get him out of the hot tubs. Like dude, you're about to hit the heat exhaustion. You've got to get out of this now. So the girls stopped finally and they're like what's wrong? I'm like we've got to get him out. Quit playing. That's right. Thank God I was paying attention so. You were telling me you were like, yeah, they already started fingering pussy. And I'm sitting there trying to watch.
I just have to look over and go, oh, shit. And so we, I, we get him out and he's like, what are you doing? I'm like, dude, you're at heat exhaustion. I've seen this before in the military. You've got to get out. Can we? Just call him John so we can say John was like John Doe. John Doe slipping. In the hot tub at this point. So we we get him out, we get him upstairs and then I thought everything was done. I did because they had their
older children there. And the next thing I know, she's like, well, we, we can still do something. I'm like, no, no, we can't. Our friends said that our friends so we can still play if that's all right. And John Doe was laying down on the bed, resting. And I said, he can't. I was like, he needs to rest. I mean, he's he's at heat exhaustion, so he can't do anything. And I was like, are you OK with that? He's like, do it. You, you had two women to play with.
I know that was hard for. You it was hard. You know, it's harder than you think You got you got to spend time with one, make sure you're not like ignoring the other one. Go back to that one. You only. Have two hands. Only two hands, one little pack. One penis. I mean, we could do so much. That's that's you. Girls don't get it. I mean, for, for a guy, if you're doing a three-way and it's just you and two girls, you got to keep going.
You can't like ignore one, go back to the other one and then ignore the oh, now you're ignoring me and you're like, oh crap, what do I do? And then your pepper quits working and you're like, oh, shit. Next thing you know, they're just eating one another out. You're in the corner just sucking your thumb. But luckily it wasn't like that, no. We were having fun with our friend. Yeah, we were having fun. And then he has what's called equipment. John does.
Yes, he pulled it out from under the. Bed. Yeah, he's just like, underneath that bed is like just a suitcase of sex toys. It's hilarious. And he pulls out this vibrator. It's huge. I'm 6/1 and damn thing was as long as my arm. You said it was like a big old back. Massager. It was like a big old back massager. I mean, you can hit a home room with that sucker, It was that big. He plugged it in. I swear to God the light's dimmed. And so I said, dude, you, you cannot play John.
He's like, I know I'm good, I'm good. I'm I'll sit right here and watch so you. Got to jump start a motor. We're using it and, and we're we got it on Ellen and she has her orgasms and once again when Ellen has her orgasms, she forgets everything. So I'm back having sex with with the other lady and then Ellen is like picks up the the back massager and just slings it, just throws it and I'll say you hear what the hell, Ellen? And we look over and she comped him upside.
They have that jacket. I didn't mean to. He was behind us and I was watching you guys and I just got into the moment. You did. You almost knocked him out. So he had heat stroke and a concussion. And then I'm like, no way. And then that night he sends us a picture and yes, he had a bruise on his skull. And a little sad, but I gave. Him, you gave him aftercare. You did.
So basically you did BDSM to him, you beat him up, you gave him, gave him some aftercare, which is the cutest thing I've ever. Seen. Yeah, Ellen sent me a picture that day. And she's like, Mia, you won't believe what we did. And I'm like, what did you do, Ellen? And so she sent me this, and it was her and John Doe's face side by side. And it was the sad face. That was a cute picture. It was a really cute picture.
Yes. And I'm just like, my wife's going to kill the motherfucker here soon because Ellen doesn't pay attention to nothing when she starts doing things I don't. Just. Live in the moment. She lives in the moment. She lives in the moment, yeah. I was on, yeah. Well, you. Know what? What time? Oh God, no. One time. His arm was out of socket and he was, you know, he was having a hard. Time. OK, yeah, here's. I was. Here's another, Here's another funny story.
I tore all the ligaments out of my my right shoulder. I tore all of them off the bone so it would easily pop out of socket. Yeah. So we were playing with another couple. We were at another, another dungeon. And we were in there playing. And Ellen's on top of this, this her partner, and she's having a good time.
And I'm trying to get stupid. And I grabbed the lady's legs and I pin them back and my arm slipped and my shoulder came completely out of socket, like it was just dangling there. My wife Ellen does this. The the poor girl that I'm with, she's freaking out. She's like, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God. And so the Ellen's like, he's fine, Get his ass in the shower, get some hot water on him. I'm about to have my orgasm. He'll be just fucking fine. And so. And it's not fine either.
It's dangling out and we go in the bathroom and she's like, what do I do? I'm like, turn on the hot water and you can hear them in the room still fucking. And then and so I got the hot water on it and she's like, what are you going to do? I'm like, just turn away. And she turns away. And I popped my arm back over and I snapped it back into place. And the minute I snapped it, you hear a Oh my God.
And then we look and I'm like, well, she's had hers and we've been walking out and I'm like, I'm walking out and I'm looking at her and she goes, are you OK? I said, well, apparently you are. And she's like, I'm sorry, but I had to have mine. So Mama had hers. Wow. Helen. I know, right? I had to finish. I was focused on that Dick. And she was, she's on top, had a little vibrator where it was. And she's like fuck all y'all, I'm having mine, Mama wants hers, Mama's going to get hers.
I'm. With you, I'm with you. You know, the one thing men can't understand is that when a woman is so hyped, hypersensitive, and then they get all hyped up with sex and they're ready to have an orgasm and then it fucking stops. Oh. Well then she is pissed. Well, it's like a form of blue balls for us. It is. It sucks. It's. Horrible it does. But isn't it like easy for you guys to get like back there though? Not always. Normally it's because we're so fucking pissed. Off It's like we.
Want to punch somebody? It was like, I'm gonna fucking kill you, you know? Yeah. Yeah, I like it. You gave that look, yes. I will get mine. You go, pop your arm back in place and we'll be fine. That's not. I feel that you feel. That that's not the other time it's popped out. It's popped out before, yeah. You're you're falling. Apart so it's mixed now it doesn't pop out anymore thank God.
The day before my surgery to get it we went with met with a couple and I'm like what the fuck are we doing? I'm getting surgery tomorrow at 4:00 in the morning. We're up in Mobile, AL and what happens? That motherfucker popped out again. Oh. My gosh. You were horny sea bass. That's the big question. That's true. I was like, I got to get surgery. What are we doing? Oh, we're fucking OK. Sure. You're going to be all right, Clark. We're good. Yeah, we're good.
You're. Good, you don't need anything. You can get your nut tonight though, don't worry. No, I didn't. I didn't. That sucker popped out. I was like I'm done, I am done. That's the first time we did separate room play. Oh wow. That was the first time we did separate room play which I'm not a big fan of that but if that's what y'all like, do it but. Yeah, we we decided we don't really. We don't let. We don't let because you can't see what your partner's doing.
The fun part is like watching you and your partner. And like, if you are allowed to videotape you and the other couple having sex, it's fun for you to we'll go back home and we'll watch the video together. And it's fun to do that and get all excited again. And we'll watch that and have sex. Or get critiqued by your wife going. What were you doing right there? I do not. She does. She picks on me and goes what are you thinking?
Thinking with my penis. But yeah, but that story at that next day went back, got up at 4:00 in the morning and it got my shoulder it. Sure. Did I forgot about that God? Yeah, it's been a wild two years thanks to meeting Mia. Yep. Mia. What? What did you say, Mia? You were like within two months I'm gonna have her eating pussy. Yeah. Exactly. You're right. I was. I was. I called it. Damn. Yeah, good. I call it Yeah, I said.
I read people really, really well what they like sexually, and it's like I really have to block that out for my friends and family. I just can't do it. See. Yeah. I don't want to know. Yes. So my thing of it is, you know, you all, I always tell you, I said there's there's two types of swingers. There's people like you that just have sex with people, to have friends, to have fun, to enhance your life, you know, just to have fun, you know, going with emotions.
But then there's couples like we dealt with and I when I when I met that one couple that you all went and met them at the other dungeon and I said, hey, Clark, what's what's Ellen doing with that crossdresser? You know, yeah, it's like those are the people that are lost in their relationship and they're really having to seek other people to compensate how shitty the relationship really is. But I think you 2 have always
held it together. I know, I know, you'll have little spats over stupid shit, but ultimately it's all about good communication. I think that's what. Everyone has always. Said to me. Yeah, you have to talk to one. Another and it's hard to talk about. It's hard to talk about it. Sometimes to open up something that's bothering you, you need to talk about. Yeah, you better talk about it because if you let it build up, it's going to explode.
So you better if you guys have any kind of problems with anything talk. We've noticed the ones the couples who tend to want to play away, away from each other and without without the without their partner. Those are the ones that really have the the bad problems compared to us who have decided to all only play with together at the same time. Yeah, those that we've been with couples like they have like they separated and got back together and like they just prefer separate room.
Like we played with one couple and they were like, well, we prefer separate room. And I was like, well, sucks to be you. We like the same room. And so we we played in the same room. He had a little bit of problems performing and then. We, we've changed our, our rules over the past couple of years. At first we would only the first date was just a date and then we would think about playing. But there was this one couple, they were very, very sweet couple and we hit it off right
away with them. And we were thanks for going really good on the date. And we had been texting that week. So we kind of already felt like we knew them and we decided to go ahead and play with them that night, which was unusual for us. So we had a really that was a really fun night. It was a fun night that that was when we were like, you know what, like and like, she said. We texted and talked, but. We decided to break our rules. Together. We broke it together.
It wasn't like, hey, I'm going to do this. You got to suck it up. We both agreed to do it. Yeah. You know, I think that's a great place to end it. And I think that you guys are absolutely awesome and thank you for joining us today. And until then, may all your fantasies become realities.