What's up Daddy Gang? It is your founding father back at it again for another episode of Call Her Daddy. Before I start this episode I need to preface this with a trigger warning. This interview contains references to abuse of a minor. Again this is a trigger warning and listener discretion is advised. If this episode is not for you, I love you and I will see you next week.
Okay, Daddy Gang. If you are familiar with today's guest you probably know them from the headline the media used to define them in 2011. Courtney Stodden, a 16 year old child bride, marries a man in his 50s. I was also 16 when this story was on the front cover of every fucking tabloid. This man was hired by Courtney's mom to be Courtney's acting coach.
It turned predatory. Courtney's parents knew and let it continue. And I remember when Courtney Stodden was signed away by their parents and granted permission to marry this dude in his 50s. At the time Courtney received endless online hate and negative media coverage. Again Courtney a child received death threats was stalked by the paparazzi sexual eye.
He was a 16 year old child. Meanwhile if you look back at all the media coverage it's like they forgot about the adults in the situation. The 50 year old fucking creep Courtney married Doug Hutchison. Next up actor would have been a pedophile if he had pursued a relationship with 16 year old Courtney. But instead Courtney's parents willingly welcomed Doug into their family and legally permitted the marriage.
After suffering abuse at the hands of countless adults and reality TV shows being exploited Courtney is now 27 gotten into therapy and started a recovery journey. Listen. I had not kept up with Courtney Stodden and sitting down with Courtney I realized the reality of how layered their story is.
And how deeply the media betrayed that 16 year old child. This is a story of child abuse that began 10 years ago. And after finalizing their divorce in 2020 Courtney is now beginning to process what it means to be a survivor. What is up daddy gang it is your founding father Alex Cooper. I will probably take five minutes to get comfortable. So sorry. I think it's just this large thing in front of my face that's giving me a little PTSD maybe.
I'm just like I'm like the same to me at this point. Okay let's drink our water. Would you prefer we were drinking actually. We could maybe get some drinks in here in a little bit. I am down. Okay. What do you like to your show? I'm down to drink. What kind of alcohol do you like? I'll just do whatever you have. I think vodka probably. I like that. It's like welcome to color daddy. It's noon on a Wednesday and we are popping the bottles open.
We were out like getting some like you know like a DVD and the entire place turned into a bar and like how long? In seconds. Yeah. Are we recording? Okay. Yeah. Maybe this will be the intro of us just summoning our drinks. We're like get me some fucking alcohol because it's about to get emotional. I think we're going to need it for this. I do too. Honestly. I do. Yeah. 45 minutes later Courtney and I have taken 12 shots. We fixed our flyaways. We've eaten the mic.
And I think we're ready for therapy. Cheers. Cheers. It's just so fun. I'm amazing to meet you. Yeah. We are the same age. And I remember seeing your story when I was like 15 16. I remember watching it kind of unfolding in the news and since then so much has happened in your life. And I really appreciate you sitting down with me. You live in LA? Yeah. I live in Brentwood. Oh area. Love that area. Yeah. How long have you lived there?
I've lived there probably for like a year and a half now and Kamala Harris is my neighbor. So. I was just really shocking because I'm in the middle of studying for my license finally a 20 freaking seven years old. Like finally you know past my permit like trying to get my license and I'm like trying to drive home and there is like so much traffic on this little street.
Couldn't figure it out and then I like I went too fast and one of these guys was like I don't know like a security card because you just slow down you know Kamala Harris is getting to try and go home and I'm just like what that. Well that's right there. That's also LA like how fucking just casual that you're just like neighbors with Kamala you're like what's up. So crazy. Have you ever seen her?
I've tried like since then I've kind of like been this like I've been driving really slow with my permit you know like looking over in her house like literally two miles an hour just like so crazy. Right I know but there's like security in front so I think they're starting to kind of look at me like why is this bitch like so far down. But it's just yeah it's amazing I mean I was the first time I ever voted in my adult life and I voted for Kamala and that's such a cool moment.
Yeah it comes full circle now you're just casually neighbors you must live in a nice neighborhood Courtney. You're like no comment absolutely. Did you always have aspirations to move to LA like when you were a little girl did you want to be like famous what did you want to be. I've always loved music I always wanted to pursue that at a really really young age and my mom she was always very supportive of it I think that she found a lot of.
Entertainment in supporting her daughter as well and so her and I just kind of like became this almost like a momager to me and then you know was that mindset of helping her daughter. When and why did your parents decide to homeschool you. My father wasn't involved in that situation he wasn't contributing at all to the decision to pull me out.
Norted he really know that I was being completely abused and bullied at school in sixth grade I was pulled out because I was bullied I mean I got a lot of like my old friends bullying me and you know my my arm was broken at one point. And I just was that kid that was really popular before I hit puberty and then when I hit puberty I was treated so differently and as a child like you really don't understand why you're being treated differently.
Assault emails that I was getting from the future middle school and staff you know they're going to knock my teeth down my face and you know they're going to. You know just it's just going to be a really horrible experience for me so my mom pulled me out because of that yeah at that time your dad was not in your life.
You know I think in looking back at it I feel like my father completely left me emotionally abandoned and I don't know if he's that type of man to be able to properly emotionally be there for their child. It just doesn't seem that way because history wouldn't have been the way it is for me like my life right but all kind of falls back to that relationship. So many young women go through that and then it directly affects their romantic relationships. Absolutely.
We were getting to you got married to a man in his 50s when you were 16. His name is Doug Hutchison. How did you meet Doug let's take Courtney's grabbing for the vodka we're like hold on let's take a sip of our drink. Here we go let's get into Doug. How did you meet Doug? Doug and I met through a mutual friend so the mutual friend manager introduced my family to Doug because Doug was teaching acting classes here.
I was in LA and I always kind of expressed interest also in seeing but in acting and that's how we connected through email. Email. So you got connected with him on email and what were the initial conversations you were having with him via email? I think I just need a little break. Yeah, take your time. What's coming up for you right now? I'm still healing from this. It's very very very fresh for me. I wore waterproof mascara specifically. I never wear waterproof.
But we met through a mutual friend. We started connecting through email and my mom and this you know, our mutual friend. His name is Tim Wilson. He didn't know about the exchanges that Doug was having with me. My mom did. She was aware. She was like over my shoulder the entire time practically or having me print out the emails and she was reading them.
And you know, nothing was sexual but it was definitely not about what it was supposed to be about which was about teaching me acting and you know, all of that stuff that you know, professionally you're supposed to be doing. And then as a child, I didn't really see it as anything predatory. I mean, I don't think children have that capacity to really see that especially if they don't feel like they have a proper relationship with their father.
You know, there were just questions like, you know, what's your favorite color and, you know, what, where do you see yourself in five years? And you know, let's play ten questions and then we're going to get to know each other that way first, you know, after that. Then I can kind of help teach you, you know, where I think you fall good in acting and just all of this BS.
Now I know in retrospect, right? It's just a way to to start figuring out the child and to get your claws in them and, you know, control them. Did he know what you looked like? Because you were only communicating on email. Did he know your age and did he know what you looked like? He knew what I looked like. My manager at the time sent him pictures and he was very much aware of what I looked like.
But he claims that, you know, he's never known my age. He never knew my age. It's not true. He did because my mom received a call from him and he said, you know, so I really want to start teaching your daughter acting and she goes, okay, well, you know, she's only, you know, she just turned 16. And he knew my age. Absolutely. He did. Did you know how old he was? I did. Yeah. Yeah.
So you were saying that your mom was like printing out the emails and looking over them with you. Do you remember your mom ever saying anything to be careful of or was it was she condoning this during the time too? My mom has always been a very protective mother. I mean, just just going back and kind of trying to shine a little light on my backstory a little bit.
My mom has gotten a lot of hate and I understand why. I mean, if you know, if I ever have a baby and I'm raising that baby, I, from my own experiences, I would never sign my kid off ever to an adult man. You know, 34 years old. There's just no way that would happen. But I think that she thought she was doing something that was going to make me happy truthfully.
I really believe that. But in retrospect, she knows it was the wrong decision. She's even, she's apologized to me so many times and has said, you know, if I could just do anything to do over, I would, I'm just so sorry when sign off on this. How long were the two of you speaking online before you met in person? We spoke online and on the phone for six months. And then I met him in person. He came to my hometown.
And what were the expectations of him coming? Like, what was the purpose of that trip? I believe it was obviously to see his child in person, verify the parents are on board. I'm not going to go to jail. And I can get that free pass to molester child. I just need that paperwork signed for me to get married because it's a loophole. Right. And then a week later, we got married. So I basically just met him in person one week and then a week later, I'm married.
But just to get context, so you had fully had a conversation of this is a relationship before you met in person. Like that was art now in the works fully and your mom was aware of it. I was already groomed before I met him. Yeah, he comes into town. What was that like with him meeting your parents and everything? Like, do you remember that week? I do, but there was a specific moment that really stands out to me after picking him up from the airport.
My father was driving. My mom was there, felt like I had support. My dad just said he needed to meet him in person. And then he could just sign off on it. Which in retrospect makes me extremely angry. He was in his very own fragile state of mind at that point in the marriage with my mother. My mother was in a very bad place with my father. So this was like a perfect, like, you know, grooming situation for someone like Doug.
I remember being, you know, picking Doug up from C-Tack, driving about an hour and a half to a cafe. And I thought maybe at least it would take the entire weekend for my father to then talk to me and say, you know, I don't know if you, you know. I feel like I really did want to marry Doug because I thought I was in love with him. But there was also something in me as a child that made me question if my father really loved me.
So it was like this, you know, dichotomy. And so when we got to that diner, we had a little lunch. My dad immediately before the 8th or lunch took Doug outside and said, you know what, you have my blessing. He didn't even see him for maybe an hour. They didn't talk. My dad was driving. Doug was in the back seat. And he gave Doug the blessing to take his child away from him.
You know, even if he did feel like, you know, his, his family was falling apart and all these things, like, I feel like he did choose himself. Did your dad ever pull you aside and ask how you were feeling? He did before we met Doug, but it was just like five minutes and my bedroom kind of took my hands as it is is what you want. I know he was, I know he was arguing with my mom. I could hear them screaming, you know, throughout the house. And he, he just, but I just think he gives up so quickly.
That's just the kind of person he is. He just kind of like runs away from issues and he's, so I mean, you know, it just makes sense why this happened. Right. And it happens to so many other children in the USA. I mean, about 300,000 children, underage children were married to adults between the, between the years of 2000 and 2018. And 86% of those children are girls. And it's in this country. We think of child bright as some foreign situation, but it is so, it's so prevalent in the USA.
Yeah. Right now. And it's terrifying. And some as young as 10 years old. Did Doug treat you like an adult or did he treat you like a child? I think that it's pretty obvious that he looked at me like a child, but wanted to treat me like some kind of object. How did he pitch you on getting married? Why couldn't you guys just date? I grew up in a really Christian family. And I was a virgin when I met Doug. And, you know, because of my mom's own, again, I mean, I'm going through this in therapy.
So I'm not yet healed from all of this. But, you know, she believed that this guy would really take care of me and really love me. And she was also in a position to feel like she could believe him. I mean, she really did. You know, I'm just going to say it. When I went through this divorce process with Doug, I found out that right after I left him, he started pursuing a 15-year-old girl in the UK.
And I have all of the proof. I have all of the emails. I got connected with an ex-assault victim. And he was doing the same thing to another 15-year-old girl while I was going through this process. Is there a tissue? I'm still working through all of this. So you're going through the divorce and you find out he's already on to his next victim.
Yes. I found out through a step-mother who reached out to me on Instagram. And I just, I can't tell you how much that broke me, like even after all of the control. I felt like I didn't even have control over my own body, my own finances. I couldn't sign any legal documents in that marriage. I couldn't sign off on my own marriage.
I was just so controlled. But then I think that there's this trauma bond that happens when you're that age. Right? You have like this. I don't want to say I had Stockholm Syndrome because I did.
There's this grooming. It's the effects and the mental effects of grooming. Right. Where I didn't want to believe, you know, right? I mean, few people reach out. I just didn't want to believe it. I just, you know, it's not what how he made me feel. He made me feel really, really special and unique. I just really believed him.
And then just finding out everything. It's just, it's just, you know, horrible. And then reading that, you know, that he's he's doing he's ready to marry another minor. I just helped with the attorneys there. Get this little girl away from him. Wow. It just became my mission because I know exactly what he was doing. I saw the emails. They were the same emails to me and they were the same letters because in 96 same letters he was writing and his handwriting to this other 15 year old girl.
It just clicked that I was with a predator. And I never, I never, I was just so groomed. I never wanted to believe it. Legally, how were you able to marry Doug? I was able to marry Doug because my mom signed off on the paperwork. Did your parents prior to that or any adult have a conversation with you of like, this is what's going to change in your life if you marry this man?
Did anybody have that conversation with me? Yeah. Like, hey, if you get, you're about to get married at 16 like, this is what's going to happen. No. No, I mean, I really didn't even know what was going to happen on the honeymoon. I had no idea really. You're wedding day. You're walking down that aisle. What do you remember feeling on that day? I was beyond nervous because I just wanted to play the part for him.
Like, I wanted him to be impressed with me. Like, I was a woman. I mean, I was a kid. So I feel like I was playing dress up in a sense, but I was so madly in love with him that I just like, I don't know, it was just this really strange feeling that I always carried with me. And I mean, the photo of my father walking me down the aisle is really interesting to me because he has this look on his face. I mean, you can Google it.
Like, he has this look on his face where he's just so angry, but he's still doing it, which was really, you know, it just, I don't know. How does it make you feel when you look at that photo? Angry. Yeah, I definitely know like the more awareness and therapy and the more I come to terms and like go through all of these things.
I'm seeing things so much more clearly. It's so hard to see something so clearly when you're the one who is in, you know, that spotlight and you get so much, you know, support, but hate and like all of that. Like, it's so hard to just make sure that you're listening to a healthy amount of it all, I believe, but like I just got to a place where I was just listening to so much negativity because that's, that's really, I mean, I really didn't have that much self worth.
Did you ever ask your dad seeing that photo? Like, why did you then walk me down the aisle? No. My father has completely disowned me. He texted me and said, you were not my daughter. This was about three years ago. So I don't have a relationship with that man. What triggered him disowning you? My marriage to Doug because I was obviously old enough to make that decision. My mother not wanting to be with my father because of my decision she wanted to go with me and that broke up their marriage.
He obviously hits the bottle pretty hard. I think he he's he runs away from a lot of things. Um, he's kind of always been like that. But he's really believed to like underneath it all he is a really scarred, amazing, gentle man. He just doesn't know how to deal with any of this properly. I mean, even, you know, even serial killer parents like never disown their.
It's a great way to say it. You mentioned that you were a virgin when you met Doug and you mentioned that you had no idea what the honeymoon was going to entail. Right. What do you recall about that night and losing your virginity and the whole experience? I mean, for that whole experience for me was so like insane. I mean, coming from a release like I grew up or Kurt Cobain grew up and it is like the most depressing freaking town like nobody does anything.
You know, like it's and so from that to being pulled a week later into this, I mean, I just I just shut down. I disassociated myself. I tried the best I could to put on that that role, you know, because that's what grooming is really. I, you know, came from really small town and then immediately like right up in the Hollywood Hills and, you know, the honeymoon is going to be scheduled at the Shotsomarmont penthouse.
And I remember running into the bathroom, shutting the door and just looking in the mirror and crying for, I don't know how long I was just crying. And I know I, I was feeling stuff that I wasn't necessarily letting myself process or I wasn't old enough to process or something. I don't know. I take my bra off. I was wearing those bombshell Victoria secret bras. Do you remember that? It was like two big cup sizes.
And then inside of that, I had a cutlet. So they were like, and I was so freaked out to undress because I'm like, he's just, he's not going to love me like this like he, like how like I look like a kid, like I looked like a 12 year old with my clothes off. Little did I know it was a fantastic night for him, but I was a complete nervous wreck. So you were petrified to get undressed petrified. Yeah.
Once you did, did you ever loosen up or did you feel uncomfortable the whole time? Like how did he handle calming you? Well, he gave me a little wine before when I went into the bathroom. So I had a little wine at 16 before you have sex for the first time. Just a little. Yeah. Were you, was that the first time you had had a drink?
I had a corona the day I arrived to Doug's house with my family. Before we got married before we all jetted off to Vegas the next day, I remember I opened his fridge and I'm like, I'm fucking emancipated. I'm having a corona. So it was like my first corona ever. So I started drinking when this. Yeah. So at 16 starting to drink, right. Being married, you go to this honeymoon afterwards. What was early marriage life like for the two of you?
I just remember waking up the morning after at the Chattamra mat. And I'd be, you know, I was growing up in such a religious household and I remember looking down at the sheets, the white sheets. And I was just, I was praying to God. I was like, please. And for some reason, I kind of felt like the one that wasn't good enough all the time.
Like, you know, I'm like, please, I pray to God that there's some cherry on there because if there's no freaking cherry, like I'm not, I am not going to be good enough for this man. Like literally how sick is that? Like, I mean, I'm not putting down anybody's beliefs, but like for me, I just look back at it and I just feel like it's so sick. And I, I, I saw it and I was like, I felt like, okay, so this is ordained by God. Like this isn't our dean situation.
How was he towards you after that first night together? I have never seen him so on top of the moon. I mean, I woke up and he had his little leg hat on. He was playing the piano. Like, you know, he, he just was, I mean, he just got to molest a child legally. With a 34 year difference between you and Doug back then, what was presented to you that you guys had in common?
He would, you know what, he would always answer this question. So whenever we would do like, you know, our media rounds or he would do an interview or I would do an interview, I would always kind of fall back on what he would tell everybody like my dad. I'm like, oh yeah, okay. So that's, that's how I answer this media question.
What do you have in common? We love I love Lucy. You know, we love the honey mooters. We love, you know, you know, AC DC and, you know, Jack White and all these like bands that we really love. And it's just so crazy how much we have in common. So that was like the how he would connect it for people to be like, you know what, I'm, I'm like a backdoor of life. She's like front door like we meet somewhere.
Yeah, with TV shows and you say, yeah. What were like dinners like between the two of you drinking all the time, drinking, drinking, drinking. And he condoned it. If anything, he pushed it on you. I mean, you said the first night he never told me no. Did you have to have sex with him like on his schedule? I still have scars on me. Physical scarring. So, yeah. When did you start to realize this may not be what I want to do forever?
When did you start to realize this may not be what I want to do forever with this man? I was way too young to be crying on the kitchen floor every freaking night with a bottle of wine and opening another one. I felt like I didn't have at that point in time like 17 years old.
I didn't feel like I had anybody in my corner. I felt like, you know, because I was being told to commit suicide at 16. I mean, every moment I would turn around, there'd be another hit piece, you know, in the grocery store, somewhere else. People talking about how I'm dressing or behaving and little did they know then that is a part of grooming. I was trying to be that part, right? And, yeah, that part really did a doozy on my self-worth, really.
When did you realize he had a drinking problem? Gradually. Because when he first was reaching out to me, you know, he was claiming that he was getting sober and he wanted to be sober and he was cleaning up his life and things like that. And I believed him. I don't know anything really about it anyway. I mean, I know my dad drank a little bit, but I wasn't really that close with him. So it wasn't some like alarming thing.
But it became an issue probably two months into our relationship when I started noticing like Jackal on hide. You know, like what was it like living as a child with an alcoholic adult in a house together? Which time? With my dad or dad? There are so many to count. I mean, it was almost every night. I mean, for years. And were you scared in the house? Yeah. There was a gun. I mean, yeah. I mean, you know, did he ever when he was drunk, take it out?
I don't want to legally talk about that right now. Yeah. Was Doug physically and verbally abusive? He was extremely emotionally abusive to me at times physical, but mostly emotionally and abusive because I think that that's the ultimate power a groomer has over a child is that emotional abuse and control. Yeah.
Were you always playing the part and then behind the scenes kind of trying to figure out at one point and escape plan? We separated a couple times, but every time we separated, I just felt like I couldn't live without him. I mean, I was raped a few times when I left him and it and I go back to him and he's just kind of like, well, what do you expect?
Yeah, you left me like, you know, I'm the one who loves you. I'm the one who takes care of you. And so that's why it took so long. You know, the media is always wondering why it takes so long. That's what was happening is this abuse, this emotional abuse. And I think too, like so many victims and survivors blame ourselves.
We blame ourselves because we think it's our fault, but the full picture is the the abuser is the one who is controlling that it's not your fault at all. And I wish I could have told myself these things in those moments. Yeah. This is a deep one. You're doing amazing. Seriously. I feel like I'm on Oprah right now. You did bring up during the Me Too movement.
Those sexual assaults. Can you explain what happened just more, more adult men exploiting either a minor or a very young teenage girl at that point in time. When you when this happened to you because you explain you were on a break with Doug. Like your initial reaction was to run back to him, which if people aren't educated, they'd be like, what the fuck that makes so much sense.
I got that a lot, you know, when I chose to go back with him the first time. I mean, even some celebrity friends were like, what the fuck are you doing? Like why in the hell are you doing that? And it's so hard to explain this to somebody who hasn't been through it. Now knowing, like what are some tangible red flags to look for. That indicate grooming. I feel like you can Google a sociopath and get the exact same definition, charming, intelligent, um,
an empath, someone who can disarm you, disarm your family. And that's the scary part. It's like you don't. How can you always, you know, spot that the public hate you were getting not only just from like random people like celebrities. You got Courtney love called you publicly. A whore Anderson Cooper shamed you on national television and Chrissy Teigen took it to a new level. She publicly wished you dead.
And at the time it seems like no one gave a fuck. No one saw anything wrong with it. Some of her tweets. I hate you. Go to sleep forever. What drugs make you do that with your mouth asking for a friend who really wants to know how to look like an idiot. Thanks to confirm have had you ever met Chrissy Teigen. Not have I only not met her but I've never spoken to her in my life.
Like and I actually really liked her like I followed her. I mean obviously I love John Legend like I love I just was like I was following them and then I started seeing this on my timeline. And I was like. But I love you I just had this feeling but I really like you but like other than that at that point in time because I was so young. I don't think I processed how deeply that led to my future depression.
I mean you're literally getting publicly shamed but at that point time as a kid I was just like I was just like oh she's she's sexualizing toddlers and she is like oh big deal because I was a kid right. I mean she was shaming Lindsey Lohan she was struggling with a lot of you know her own stuff and I just I just freaking love Lindsey like you know I think Chrissy was in a really she had to have been in a really dark ass place to tell.
These child children and women you know these things to I don't know make herself feel better about herself I know now you know she's she's saying she's doing the best she can and I really hope that she means it you know if that stuff continues we're just going to see more suicides unfortunately it's not going to help.
She those were public tweets did she she privately message you right she she privately messaged me a lot it was like sometimes it was like really late like two and the more like you know and I don't know what it was it wasn't just like one or two tweets you know like Courtney love you know just call me a horror big deal. Love you too but Chrissy it was like it was over wasn't it over like two years of her.
It was a really long time what was she privately messaging you she privately message me I specifically remembered this one because I was I was just like so shocked right. It was really early in the morning at some point this was a really I mean this was a freaking decade ago I know a lot of people can change in that time frame but I didn't hear from her when she apologize I was blocked from everything she messaged me I cannot wait for you to die.
And that was just one of them that I remember and then publicly she was saying you know dirt nap or something you know I can't wait for you to take a dirt nap and she was just obsessed with seeing me die. If you say something to Chrissy Teigen right now like what would you say to her if you saw her. I really don't have anything to say to her I don't need to speak to Regina George it's not something I need I don't need that I'm Lindsay. Like I will push you in front of a bash.
I think that's very mature of you. So you are on multiple reality shows. How did you make the decision to enter reality television? I didn't. My pedophile husband is the one who decided to sign me up for things because you know he needed the money. You know another misconception is people thought I was a gold digger I married him for money. I'm the one who was taking care of him. That's why I entered reality TV because I felt like I had to I mean he controlled the bank account.
I didn't even know how to write a check. So whenever I was sent into something it felt almost like a conservatorship right in a way. But yeah I was the one making the money and that's why I would do the shows. I would get so sick before the shows I know on mother daughter I was so underweight. I felt so anorexic before that. I mean I went on the show I was throwing up right when I got there. I was throwing up nothing. I didn't have anything to eat in a few days. I wasn't eating on set.
You know I just I got to a point where I was so freaking sick. And I was sent to the hospital on the show because of it because I just I was going to faint. Like I was so sick. But really Doug cared about me finishing it out and getting the money and then returning it to him. So you would get the money and then he would take care of the finances. Do you think that the amount of hate you were getting even bond did you more with Doug because it's like you?
Absolutely. We felt like Bonnie and Clyde. I mean that's what he would tell me. Yeah. You know he was like you know we're Bonnie and Clyde baby that's it. It's it's it's you and I and there were things that would bond us together right that only we would know and abuse of tactics that he would you know put into play throughout the 10 years of. Can you give an example. Was there anything he would say it got to a point where he would have to convince me just just to do it.
Like he would be pushing me like literally like pushing like the conservator. You have to go collect this money. You know you are the what did he call me something all the time. It called me the golden goose you're the golden goose you got you know we're going to you got to pay the rent you know that's that's that's what it is. And then he would guilt trip me if I didn't want to do it or if I said I was too sick or not mentally I can't you know I need a break.
You were on celebrity big brother when you were 18. This was the first time you were really apart from Doug. Yeah. Can you take us through what it was like moving into that house and what that experience was like. When we got to London I remember being on a hotel room in the room I'm just I have this trauma right now that I'm just even thinking about this. But he was standing there Doug was standing there and I was holding on to his legs.
And I was just crying my eyes out because I knew the producers were going to come pick me up I couldn't this was the first time I was ever like truly away from him. I couldn't breathe like being away from this man that's how groomed I was I didn't know how the hell I was going to get away from him and be away from him for a few weeks or month or whatever.
And I was so distraught and I was so depressed but then by the time I got on the show and by the time I you know became friends with Dustin diamond like he was the one who was in there that kind of made me realize some things in my relationship with Doug.
And by the time I ended the show I knew I didn't want to be with him anymore I knew there was something not up right like that that that wasn't right and by the time we got back to the US I told them I wanted a separation and that's when I finally felt free enough to get away from him strong enough to get away from him. I was assaulted and then I went back yeah that's a pretty big moment to realize what was helping you process that space.
I mean really space you know it kind of felt like college for me or something like I went away to college and I and it just made me realize I don't I don't need him controlling me outside of this like I don't I don't need that but at that point in time it felt completely impossible to get away from.
Your experience on celebrity big brother was the first moment you started to see like what life would be like without Doug then a few years later you wind up on another reality show that focuses on your relationship with your mom the mom and daughter experiment when you went on the show what was the status of your relationship with your mother at that point.
I hadn't spoken with my mom for two years it was such a really hard situation because Doug was isolating me from my entire family at that point in time so I blamed her for a lot and I was just in this really confused mindset so the producers kept my mother off of the first night off of the property everybody else could be on the property you know hiding Montaig's mom and you know Natalie Nans mom and you know.
Real housewife you know they could all be there but my mom couldn't be there because they knew of what a fragile situation it was and then the next episode the introduced her and it was just so.
It was so difficult for me to finish this the to finish I was completely underweight I was so sick I was taking too many things you know because my mom would be telling me one thing and then Doug would be telling me another and then the whole world and celebrities and strangers and friends would be telling me other things so I just.
Completely disassociated myself for myself and it made me really really sick so I'm surprised I got through that entire reality show to tell you the truth on the show we find out that your mom was having an emotional affair with Doug your husband at the time and that Doug had sexual fancies involving here we go with this. We find out that Doug had sexual fantasies involving the three of you what was your mom's relationship with Doug.
I'm still working on that therapy okay and do you know when you when those things were said on the show yes are they true. What I met Doug he would go up and kiss a friend of mine on the lips immediately what it wasn't anything that was like you know can you be like you know anything like that but he was very charming oh how are you and he's a nice you know and I've had so many people tell me that it just made them feel so uncomfortable they felt assaulted.
Right but in his head I would talk to him about it and in his head it's like what do you mean I'm just greeting them I'm greeting them oh yeah I'm sexually so you know you're right but it felt like that for a lot of women and he did the same thing to my mother did Doug talk about your mom in sexual ways never I never I personally never never heard that. So when you were addressing your mom on the show saying you know I know you're having an emotional affair with Doug.
Where did you hear that information from Doug again my mom has had her own experiences in life. I really you know seeing her fall in love with my husband through me so it was like this you know I don't know I mean she even told me you know we you and I are like I'm these twins whatever you feel I feel and so I was a kid and she was going along with her kid with the situation.
Right I'm still healing from this do you know if they ever had a sexual relationship you know what I I would never know you know usually I would say absolutely not you know that's crazy but my life has been I mean when I go to sleep my dreams are so normal I wake up my life is so freaking insane so I just like to sleep most of the day I got up early for this okay I'd be sleeping I appreciate that okay so you does it. Does it haunt you a little bit that you don't have that answer.
I'm haunted by a lot of shit it's not on the top of my agenda right now because I have so many other things that like I'm I'm I'm dealing with and going through and trying to make sense of. I definitely think eventually it's obviously I mean I'll get to it what impacted reality TV have on your body image.
I don't know if it was necessarily reality TV I think was mostly the media when I shot into like this cannonball like just like that was everywhere overnight I you know when your teenager you see yourself certain way near me right. You're listening to fucking trace songs right right. You're just like yeah damn good and then you know you see yourself every angle in the media and.
It completely shattered me so I had my breast done right when I turned 18 like that was something that I needed to do for myself because everybody already thought that I had these big boobs and you know I was already bullied for them and you know.
When I'm doctor drew that can we talk about that because I watch that clip I don't know how that just got passed everyone tell you when that's not watched it you're 16 years old you go on doctor drew show and quite literally my mouth dropped when I watched it this morning of you on a table in front of a live audience and they're basically doing like an ultra sound on your boobs to see if they're real because people didn't believe they were real at the time.
At like 16 right who made yes who made that decision for you to go on the show. I'm done did. And how would he present those ideas to you money at that point in time I completely was like oh okay I guess this is you know what I need to do I mean that was the thought of a child I feel like was you know it's kind of like that's that's what he wants me to do and I was so far in deep already that I just.
I just kind of like became that persona when you talk about getting your breasts on at 18 what was the decision to get them done I wanted to be the woman everybody expected me to be you know from strangers and media and everything else it just felt like I. I needed to put that persona on yeah right and Doug kind of.
Benefitted from that as well like you know look at me I'm not just with the kid you know she doesn't like a kid and so many people fell for that I am so ready to get them out I mean like I have so many messages every week I am in so much pain I loved having them I'm not against plastic surgery I think. Right if you want to do something to your body that is your freaking choice I don't have anything wrong with that at all but my back feels like a 90 year old woman. I'm so tired.
Things out of here. Yeah yeah so all of these shows I mean there's interviews on interviews with you and Doug and eventually the relationship ended. How did it end and how did you tell him you wanted it to end I just started shutting him out okay I just distance myself from him so much to the point where I I didn't let him in anymore I grew up and I started realizing what what what was happening to me I don't think I would be sitting here right now if I wouldn't have divorced him.
When did you tell him you wanted to divorce and how I don't know if I ever did okay I was at a place where you know I knew he was in such control I felt like I had great acquaintances but no one who I can really completely open up and trust right so I just I fell into myself and I was just always praying.
I was just praying that he would leave before it was too late for me I just remember praying and waiting and hoping he would leave which he eventually did he eventually left he went to Michigan moved in with his dad who was like freaking 80 or something and you know Doug didn't have anything and I felt like I was going to be a baby.
I felt responsible for that you know somehow made me feel responsible for that but I kept I I just kept my eye on the prize and that was my health setting good boundaries for myself being strong even in those moments where I didn't want to make it anymore I mean really I just you know there's so many times but then you would always have to put on that brave face for everybody because everybody would see me do.
So what have to really you know just like like a light like go into that character I mean anyone that has a fucking brain should have been like this girl needs help she's a child she doesn't know any better. But I also think society now like has changed so much I mean this marriage took place before me to before times up I feel like in this generation right now if this was so public I feel like an army of people would become like you know bang on my door dragon me out.
But then the scary part is to me too is it's still freaking happening to people who aren't as high profile as me and who don't have those resources what were the next few months of your life like trying to like figure out life without him because you'd been with him for over seven eight years.
It was ten years with the time our our divorce yeah wherever you go there you are right so my trust issues are so prevalent in my current relationship I'm engaged I mean but also with my friendships with my my family I just have these
severe severe severe severe trust issues with so many different people but it it definitely affects my my my ability to open up to people in a genuine way it's really hard for me to do that because I was so crushed at as as a child you know and especially so publicly publicly abused like you are a survivor
you are you came in and immediately we're like oh take my phone I don't I don't want Doug to call what can you explain what's going on I blocked him recently because he's been reaching out to me you know he knows that I'm moving on you know I'm I'm trying to and and you know I'm I'm happy and I'm happy
and I find moments of happiness and I'm finding myself and I mean the most recently thing you just reach out to me a few months ago asking me for his guitar that he wants back and it's almost like that ex calling and saying hey I left a sock in your
drawer about eight years ago do you think you can like maybe send it back to me you know but like it was just you know it's just so obvious that he is still trying to victim claim control you know even after just knowing that he was just doing this to a 15 year old girl less than a month and a half ago moving forward how are you going to handle that relationship with Doug I am never going to speaking him to God like again like ever
ever I I I will never let him in and I like I feel like I have a really good predator radar now like I am I am probably way too hypersensitive but like I can see someone that walks at a room and I can just I'm so hypersensitive I'm an empath and I just yeah yeah do you think that Doug should be in jail I think he should be looked into way more than he has been
yeah and that will determine whether he needs to be you know yeah but based on everything I've heard based on everything I mean yeah 15 year old that should be more than looked into what is as we wrap up everyone's going to see Courtney Stodden what is a misconception about you if people are listening that you would not even like to clear up that you're just like that this is not who I am this is who I am
because we've seen so much of you through your youth and it was obviously skewed yeah what do you want people to know I was not a child bride I was a child who was exploited I think that that is something that people should think about you're writing your book which we've heard about we're going to keep an eye out for it and you've talked about how you want to help through this book others that are going through anything similar to your your struggle
what do you hope readers when it does come out take from your book every detail like be very afraid you know who you are are you going to use names in your book good for you can you give us one you think so oh my god he's married sure you know her husband is not the best man just say that
and are you writing details about what happened how does it make you feel to it's like a reclaiming moment for you it is but I think that it's reality I am excited for the world to hear you in this light and through a new voice which is your voice it's not someone else's it's not skewed by an abuser
because you're your phenomenal and you're a survivor and you're incredible and you're smart and you have you have the rest of your life in front of you and the fact that you're in this therapy journey you're open about you know the hardships that you've been through but also the way you're so positively talking but also realistically talking like it's not easy some days I don't want to get at a bed it's so many women are going to relate to this story
and probably find the strength that you're talking about within themselves to like get through another day and just take a day by the end of the day that's the only reason why I'm doing this honestly like I don't think I could find the strength to do this for myself and so I mean we're so pro women now I think that is so important we always should have been
but it's so important right now and it's really the only reason why I find the strength to speak out and you're about us yourself so I felt so safe to sit down with you today so thank you thank you thank you for coming on color daddy thank you