What Motivates Your Actions?

Welcome to the Buddhist Boot Camp Podcast. Our intention is to awaken, enlighten, enrich, and inspire a simple and uncomplicated life. Discover the benefits of mindful living with your host, Timber Hawkeye. As soon as I recorded the last podcast episode about the benefits of setting one intention to motivate all of our actions, I started noticing and actively questioning my own intentions throughout the day.

As you may know, we host monthly Buddhist Boot Camp Discussion Circles at various locations in California, and last week, while I was on my way to discuss the very topic of intention, I stopped at a gas station to refuel, and it was packed with other customers.

Cars were lined up three vehicles deep, one pump was out of order, and when it was finally my turn, I noticed the car on the other side of the pump didn't even have its gas cap open, and the driver wasn't filling up; he was just sitting in his car, talking on the phone. Instead of pulling up to one of the two empty parking spaces that were directly in front of him and making his phone call from there,

he just sat there next to the pump. With such a long line of cars behind him waiting for him to move, it was SO tempting to tap on his window, motion for him to move out of the way so other people can pull up, or point to the parking space ten feet in front of him with a look on my face that says, "Seriously!?" But I stopped myself. Mindfulness, to me, means the gap between impulse and action.

And, ideally, what we would do during that pause is perhaps contemplate whether what we're about to do is in line with our values; or if what we're about to say is true, necessary, and kind; or, in this case, I asked myself what was the intention behind

my proposed action? Well, I immediately started laughing because I was clearly trying to control the situation, tell people what to do, where to go, to direct traffic at the gas station so it's as efficient as possible according to the almighty me, how and where they should park... It was quite comical, actually. Yes, what I wanted to say in that moment was true, necessary, and kind, but when I asked myself if it needed to be said, if it needed to be said right away,

and if it needed to be said BY ME? That was the real kicker. I am no gas station attendant, after all, but... wait a minute, an attendant IS inside the store! I can go in there and tell him what's going on, and then HE could do something about it. I laughed at myself again, realizing I was still trying to control the situation, this time by thinking about telling the gas station attendant how to do his job.

And regardless of how good-hearted my intention to help all those other cars in line may have been, I still have no definitive answer as to what the best thing to have done in that circumstance would have been, other than to fill up as quickly as I could, and get out of the way. As we talked about this scenario in our discussion circle, I realized that one of the things that stopped me from turning into the traffic police was recognizing that I have

actually been that guy before. I have filled up gas and then left my car at the pump while going to use the station's restroom or buy a bag of pretzels without first moving my car out of the way. And let's face it, I have no idea with whom he was talking on the phone, what was going on in his life, if he was simply oblivious, downright rude,

or immobilized by something of which I was unaware. Perhaps all of that is irrelevant, because we can't ever know what other people are thinking, what's going on in their lives, or why they are the way they are. But what we CAN do is question our own intentions, and in this case, it was all about control. My ego's sneaky, little, sidekick wanted to shine, make itself known,

and perhaps even be the hero who saved the day. I still wonder, however, if not doing anything was equally cowardly, or if talking about it in group and now with you is enough. I honestly have no idea because there's no way to know how the other driver may have reacted. He could have apologized and moved out of the way, or he could have pulled out a gun. I may have escalated a simple situation, or people could simply fill up at the station across the street instead, or patiently wait their turn.

Would I have had a different impulse if the person behind the wheel was a teenager, elderly, disabled? What if the pump was giving him trouble and he was waiting for it to be solved? We have no idea. But isn't it interesting to question our intention behind how we would react in a situation like that? So I made a mental note to never do what he did, and I swiftly moved out of the way for others to get their turn. Perhaps that simple leading by example

was sufficient. Again, I don't know or pretend to know. I mean, people are motivated by very different things, you know? I live in a small town, but there is a university fifteen minutes away, and it was just their graduation weekend, which meant there were about 50,000 more people in town than usual. Many of them complained that local businesses didn't open until eleven in the morning on Sunday, for example, "They could have made so much more money

"if they opened early," they said. But not everyone is motivated by greed or money, I thought. Perhaps to those business owners, sleep is more important, or church, time with family, or a morning hike. Heck, a good friend of mine owns a business in town and he stayed closed despite it being a great opportunity to make good money, because he wanted to give his employees the time off work to attend the graduation festivities; not everyone is motivated by the same intention.

What would you say is YOUR motivation? And if you're not sure of the answer, there's a great quote by Gandhi that really brings the point home for me