The BA Q and A: The Truth About Imposter Syndrome

And if you want to have a chance at being shouted out by the show on IG, definitely go to iTunes leave us a five star review, Tell a friend, tell a friend, take a screenshot of the show, post it on ig and tag us at Brand and Mission Podcast. You can also tag me at Mandy Money. It really helps get the word out about the show and just lets everyone know that you are a part of the BA fan. All right, so let's shake up this mail bag and see what kind of questions y'all have this week.

I've got a really interesting mix. I'm loving all the career questions y'all, keep them coming. Also got a question about when's the right time to use credit unions. Got a question from a listener who's in the process of adopting a family member's child. So very interesting stuff this week again. If y'all want to send us a question, hit us up at Brandambisson Podcast at gmail dot com or go directly to IG at Brand Ambition Podcast and you can send us a DM with your question there.

Our first question comes from listener Ashley from the Gram. She says, Mandy, how do you manage new job jitters when you're moving into a corporate space as a career changer. What rituals have you developed to manage imposter syndrome? All right, Ashley? I feel this because I think anyone who's starting a new job, especially if you're starting a new job and you've switched career paths, or you're in a different industry, or even just joining a new company, it can be stressful.

But what I like to do is kind of turn it on its head and look at it this way. Nobody knows anything about Ashley. They don't know where you've been, they don't really know what you've done. They are getting the first impression of you right now, So really take that as like an opportunity, an opportunity for a fresh start, an opportunity to do things a little bit differently than

you did at your previous job. So sitting down and thinking through, you know, what are some of the things that I wish I had done at my previous job that I kind of want to do differently here. For me, a big one was boundaries. So setting boundaries when I started a new job, the first thirty days of your new job, that's when you really tell people, you know, here's how I like to work. Here is where I

keep my boundaries. And when I say boundaries, I mean are you going to be the person who's available at nine pm to answer emails or even later? Are you going to be the person who's you know, awake in the morning at five am and they're going to get a response from you. Those are little signals that you can send to your manager or your colleagues that's going to tell them, oh, you know, actually is available all

the time. So I should not feel any kind of way about hitting her up on Slack or texting her or sending her an email, you know, with an urgent, quote unquote urgent question. Whenever I want to so in those first thirty days, think about how you want to work and what kind of boundaries do you want to

set for me. It was really important to you know, establish Okay, I'm going to be available online between the hours of nine to let's say four thirty when that's my cutoff time for when I have to go pick up my kid, and making sure that everyone knows that and if I want to, you know, set aside an hour or two once the baby is down to answer some emails. That's fine, but really be careful about what signals you're sending to people in terms of how they

can communicate to you when you're starting a new job. Now, as far as imposter syndrome, no one really knows what's going on inside your head, which can kind of be some comfort. So when you show up, you know, no one is thinking, oh, Ashley is nervous. You know, Ashley is not sure if she can do this job. It's fine and it is normal to have those feelings of oh, crap, I'm in a new role. Am I actually gonna be

able to do this? Or is someone gonna tap me on the shoulder in a week and be like ooh, Ashley, I don't know if it's a good fit. That's probably not gonna happen. But I just want to normalize this idea of having imposter syndrome, and I would love to take this opportunity to If you guys haven't checked out this article in the Harvard Business Review, it is called why we have to stop telling women that they have

imposter syndrome. This is a wonderful article. It's actually the number one or one of the number one read articles in all of twenty twenty one for the Harvard Business Review. And I'm also gonna do a shout out for the author, one of the co authors, Rashika Tulshian, because she's actually joining Brown Ambission later this month and we're gonna talk all about this. So this is a little preview, but

I forget. I love this article, y'all because, first of all, it just sort of normalizes imposter syndrome, and it also turns it on its head because as women like, if you've ever gone to a women's focused event or a women's career event or a leadership conference, I guaran freaking to you that there was a session on imposter syndrome. But if you go to a conference like a general business conference or a corporate conference where it's majority you know, guys,

because that's just how the world works. I doubt there's gonna be a session on imposter syndrome, or if there is one, it's probably gonna have pink and purple colors and be targeting women. The fact of the matter is that both men and women have imposter syndrome because it's a freaking human response. It's a human response to being put into a new situation that you haven't proven yourself in yet and just kind of wondering, you know, can

I do this? So, first and foremost, imposter syndrome very normal women and men can deal with it, but you ask me, you know, what rituals have you developed to manage it? First and foremost, just acknowledge this as a normal set of emotion. I'm feeling this way because I am challenging myself and that is a good thing. If it is terrifying to show up to work on your first day because you are making a big leap or you have moved up into a new, more senior role,

that's how it's supposed to be. You know, you haven't been tested yet, so you're gonna feel a little bit nervous. One of my strategies for not so much getting rid of it, because like I said, you just have to learn to live with it. But kind of easing that is having sponsors, slash allies that I can turn to for advice. So if there was a hiring manager that brought you into the company, they obviously see potential in

you and they wanted you for a reason. So remind yourself that even if I don't know if I can do this, you know, Janis or whoever hired you, Richard, they believe in me. They think that I belong here, So let me go to them and ask questions. Asking questions is another really good tool to use and one

that you may be afraid to actually do because you're worried. Okay, well, if I'm asking questions and people may not think that I'm ready to do this, but your first thirty days in a job like this is that honeymoon phase when you can you can ask those questions. You can you know, make sure you know where the bathroom is, and on a larger scale, make sure you know how this system works or how that tool works. Ask all your questions,

ask all the questions. The worst thing you can do is walk into this role and pretend like you already know what's going on, and then just suffer in silence because you're like, oh, crap, I have no idea what anyone's talking about. I don't know what those acronyms mean.

Ask a lot of questions, and if you don't feel comfortable speaking out in you know, semi public settings like in a group meeting, that's when you turn to that sponsor, that mentor, that ally, the person who brought you in, the person who referred you, or your directs, your direk supervisor, and just ask them, hey, I've actually I've been here a few days and I've come up with a list of questions I would love to grab, you know, half an hour of your time and just walk through these

questions so that I feel more prepared to do the job that I'm here to do. Largely in companies, you know you're going to have a team there who's gonna want you to succeed, because if you don't succeed, then it makes them look bad. And you know people don't like to look bad, right, so they're going to want

to help you. Ask for help, Ask questions. Recognize that if you're feeling like a bit of an imposter, that's just a sign, girlfriend, that you are doing the right thing, that you are probably in the right place for yourself because you are growing. Okay, thank you so much for your question, Ashley. I'm going to put a link to that article I want you out. It's maybe it's some

homework before we get Rashika on the show. The co author of that article why we have to tell, why we have to stop telling women they have imposter syndrome. I'm going to post a link to that article from the Harvard Business Review in the show notes, and I cannot wait to have Rashika on later this month. Okay, next question, it comes from listener Kamiko. I love that name, so beautiful. Kamiko wants to know. I want to to

know what online counseling platform supports you guys. I've been trying to figure it out and my brain is just not recalling it. Okay, Kamiko, this is fine. Our show is supported by an online counseling service called Betterhelp b E T T E r h E l P. And what we love about Betterhelp and this is free advertising for them I guess right now, which is fine. But Betterhelp is an online counseling platform and I genuinely love

this platform. And I love that online therapy has become so normalized in the wake of the pandemic because we haven't been able to go and do the traditional you know, knock on a door in an office and awkwardly try not to make eye contact with other people in the waiting room and try not to think about what they think you're in there for, and set it calls from someone you know in a whole different space. Now we

can do it from the comfort of our home. I actually switched to online therapy, although I found my therapist several years ago and she specialized in new moms because I found the therapist because I is like, let me get my together before I had this kid, because I don't want my shit to hurt, to like, you know, roll down and to hinder him. But anyway, I love

online therapy. Betterhelp is the service go to betterhelp dot com slash brown Ambition, and we have some kind of promo with them right now, but I really encourage it. And I've got several friends and some close family members of mine who have been using online therapy services like Betterhelp,

and they are loving it. You get to log in from home, they match you with a therapist the same way that I was selective when I chose my therapist to be sure that I got a woman who was really comfortable and experienced working with new moms, new career driven moms. That was really important to me. And you can actually filter and make sure that you specify. You know what kind of therapist you're looking for, male, female, you know if they're LGBTQIA, plus all these different factors

so that you feel comfortable. So thank you for your question, Kimiko, and I hope that you are on the journey toward better mental health. I mean, that's what twenty twenty two should be all about. Right, we've all gone through the crap of the pandemic is still happening. It's time for us to take care of ourselves inside as well as outside. All Right, I'm just gonna take a little breaky break, I'm gonna get a sip of coffee, and I'll be

right back with more of your questions. This is brown ambition, Okay, Hey va, fam, I am back with our third and final question. Thank you so much for sending these in. This question comes from listener Amelia, who spells it with an AA, which I secretly love. All Right, Google is doing a twenty to one stock split in July. I want to start investing for my three year old to start his stock portfolio as a part of his financial

literacy journey. Which custodial account would you recommend? Okay, So I thought for a second you were going to ask me what I think about the twenty to one stock split happening in July from Google, But really you're just asking basically like, how do I get my three year old started investing? And I love that. I'm going to talk a little bit about Google because I think it's really exciting. I mean, a stock split basically makes it more possible because Google, what is Google stock? I don't

even know. It's really really expensive. So if you're someone who wants to buy a share of Google and you don't have enough money for a single share, unless you're using an app that allows or a tool or platform that allows you to invest in fractional shares, and a

fractional share is exactly what it sounds like. They're basically saying, Okay, if you don't have a thousand bucks to buy one single share of this company stock, We'll let you give us your little, you know, fifty bucks and we'll give you whatever percentage of that stock you know that amounts to, which is becoming more and more popular, which is kind

of great. But some companies, because their stock or one of the reasons they're doing this is because their stock has gotten you know, really really expensive, and they want to make it possible for more people to invest in their shares, they will do a stock split. We actually saw this happen earlier this year with Tesla as well, or actually last year with Tesla as well, which allowed

people to get some stock in that company. But when it comes to investing for your little one individual stock investing, whether it's for yourself or for children, I mean, if you listen to the show, y'all know how I kind of feel about that. I think it's great if you've got the time to do the research and you've got the time to dedicate to making your trades and really

deeply understanding the companies that you're investing in. But listen, you're a busy mom, and I'm a busy mom, so I'm gonna guess that you ain't got all the time for that. Okay, doesn't mean that you can't buy your son, you know, some shares in Google after they do their stock split in July. That absolutely is possible. But I actually recommend opening up a custodial account for your sons.

You can do this through any brokerage firm. I personally went to the same brokerage firm where I hold my investments, Vanguard, and opened a brokerage account. And it's a custodial account. Just means that you know, I the parent a managing it until I give over control of it to my kid after I have you know, coached him on how to handle it responsibly and all of that. And so what I actually invest in are mutual funds and index funds,

so I don't actually pick any one particular stock. And in fact, the account that I have for my son, they had an investment fund just called Socially Responsible Investing, and it's a mutual fund that basically has a bunch of different funds within it that are investing in companies that have you know, met some sort of like standard for social responsibility. And it's a pretty aggressive fund because

he's so young, and I know he's got time. And when I say aggressive, I just mean it's more heavily invested in stocks than things like cash and bonds because he's young, he's a baby, he's two years old. He's got time to bounce back, you know, if his stocks go down. So that's what I invest in. I opened up that account, and I think we could just contribute the same dollar amount, all know. I am all about

that automation. So I have an automatic debit from my checking account going directly into his brokerage account every month. So I truly set it and forget it, and I just recently checked it. I try it to check it too often, because again, I'm not like, I'm not trading. I just set it and forget it, right, But I recently checked it, and I was just like, damn, this kid is so far ahead of where I was geez. I mean even fifteen years ago, let alone when I

was a baby. So it made me feel really good as a parent that I am giving him this foundation

of financial success. And I think that's why it's such a beautiful thing, Amelia that you're considering doing for your son, because it's just going to make you feel like, especially those times when you're screaming at me because he wants the red popsicle and we only have orange and purple ones left, and he's really pissed off and he's screaming and the world is ending, and I want to clow my eyeballs out and go hide in the bathroom with

a bottle of wine and myself to death. It helps me think, Okay, listen, he's going to be okay, and he's going to be so grateful one day because at least I did this one thing right for him. Okay, I may not have the red popsicles when I have to have the red popsicles, but by god, this kid is going to have some investments. You know, he's going to have a little nest eck that he can start building wealth upon when he's old enough and ready to

get started. And I think that's just wonderful that you're going to give your son that same, you know, financial foundation. So I hope this was helpful as far as which accounts specifically, Like I said, I went to the same brokerage fund that I use, so Vanguard I've used ally invest in the past. I know there's people who've used

Charles Schwab Fidelity. I mean, there's all these options out there, but if you're happy with wherever you have your investments, you know, just for ease of only having one login to remember, you know, you could just start there. But I'm a big fan of those funds that are sort of pre selected and still at a relatively low cost. They don't have a ton of fees, but they're pre selected. All you gotta do is automatically deposit your money into it each month and you just let it rock from there.

So hopefully that was helpful. Thank you again so much, Amelia for your questions. Thank you all for your questions. Keep them coming. Hit us up Brownambition Podcast at gmail dot com, hit us up by email there, or go to at Brown Ambition Podcast on ig and slide into our DMS with your money questions. Don't forget to ask if you can be anonymous if you don't want your name out there, Otherwise I will put your name out there, and I don't want to get anyone in trouble, so

definitely hit us up. Thank you again for supporting the show. Don't forget to tell a friend about the show. Like I said at the top, take a picture, take a screenshot of this episode. Let people know that you're listening. Tag us at Brand Ambission podcast on Instagram. You can also tag me I'm at Mandy Money. That's Mandy with an I on ig as well, and thank y'all again. I will y'all next week for more B a Q and a