Hey, hey, hey, we're back. We're black, We're brown. Ambitions.
How you feeling, Mandra feeling fine, feeling just fine, Feeling like everybody at work needs to stop mentioning the fact that it can be any name.
Now.
Oh you're getting close, aren't you? Thought I would send you this email? But let me know if I just send it to someone else. I know it's getting close. I'm like, leave me alone.
I know it must be so much.
If the green light is on slack, I'm here until further notice. When I'm not here, I won't be here.
You know.
It's like, I don't know. You feel bad for all the texts that you send your friends when they were expecting at the very end, and you're like, has it happened yet? Has it happened yet, because it's happening to me now, And I'm like, leave me alone. It hasn't happened yet. I'll let you know. But uh yeah, feeling feeling okay. I'm excited for I told you guys last week that we were getting a jump on like holiday decorating, and we had all of our friends come over and
decorate our house. Looks ridiculous because I realized that it's mid November and we have all of our lights up. We have a Christmas tree. That's nice though it is nice. I mean, realistically, it was the only way we were going to be able to, like we were going to have time the babies do December, like early December. We're going to have time to do it if we waited, and it was you know, before Thanksgiving and all that. So but it was it was a lot of fun.
But now I just feel so silly. I'm like, how do you keep a Christmas tree alive for a month and a half. I'll find out.
We'll see, Oh, you have one of the real Christmas trees. Yeah, we're not doing all that.
Husbig got super sentimental about it. He's like, maybe we should go chop down our own. I'm like, oh, let's just take it down. He's like, well, next year we can go with the baby and chop it down. I'm like, okay, all right. It's being very like Norman Rockwell, oh right now.
Yeah, You're like I've learned, like in wifing that like I say okay to the things that we're not doing, but you say it now because you're like, you know, when it gets to that time, we'll just make it clear it's not happening. But it doesn't make sense to fight a year in advance. I've learned that lesson.
That is true. You have to pick your battles, you know. Yes, the whole Tesla conversation I've managed to put off for about five years now. Unfortunately it hasn't died though, so I'm going to have to approach the battle line eventually, I'm gonna have to square off.
No, There's been so many things that I've learned that, like, because like Superman will go hard for something and I'm like, in my mind, I'm like, absolutely not. And then I realized, like, you know what, this is kind of like a temporary thing, so we can battle it out, only to find out
later he you know, it's not even that serious. So I've learned to be like, well, is the thing that he's saying we should do or have or by is it something that we're actually going to get right now, like within like a week or so or a month or so. No, if it's a year from now, six months from now, I'm like, one, it could fall off, he might not be as interested, and two, you know, something could have happened where it's just not something that
he's focused on. Because I used to battle over everything and I would always win, and then he'd be like mad about that, the fact that I was always winning, and I'm like, girl, you didn't even have to battle. He didn't even want it six months later, So I really learned to be like I would say something like huh okay, like not like a committing okay, but like I'm thinking about it, but really now it's not happening.
But yeah, I'm learning from all my I know, some of the men are like what the three men that listen, and I'm like, whatever, because here's the thing. Sometimes it's not anything like, you know, like she's wanting to paint a wall or something like that. Sometimes it'll be things that are doesn't make sense for our family. I'm like, we're not gonna get a third car. There's two adults here. I have a car. You have a car just because it snows in Jersey a few months out of the year.
I'm not getting a jeep. Like I don't even leave the house hardly, dude.
I'm only on the second car argument right now, and I'm like, there's just it's always something else. It's like if you say yes to one thing, it's like, oh, okay, well now it's this like there's a home right now, and now it's about like let's build a deck in the backyard, and like there's always something else. It feels like what I have tried to do is give him easy, like give me like take an l every once in a while that maybe it hurts my pride because I
like to win, but he he keeps score. Maybe it was just like the worst thing you can do right in marriage. But yeay, we're breaking all the rules. He's like you always, you know, you're whatever you say always goes and dah da da da dah. And I'm like, yeah, boo hoo, fine, why don't you choose where we're going to dinner tonight? Even though I think I choose better nobody.
I'm learning, Like because my friend Rihanna has been married, I think I think she's been with her husband. I want to say like fifteen, no, no, maybe like twenty years altogether, but married. I think like fifteen of the twenty years. And I really watched how she navigates. I'm like, oh, that's good girl. She's our girl. We ain't been married this long happily with us. She's like, I learned to
be like, you know what, let him have that. It's not even that serious, like because she's also most women like to win, and she's like, but I've learned that, Like, girl, it's not that serious. Because she was like, because when you have to really battle for something, you're gonna want it. So you know, if it's like, you know, like we really don't need extra Jordan's, but go ahead, or we really you know, I don't want to have you know, pizza for dinner tonight, but what is like it's it's
not worth it. Like for the house, it was really difficult because you know, I was like, how are we going to do this? Because I cannot battle you every day. So we came to a nice compromise where he could do whatever he wanted in his man cave, and he got even to expand his man cave and that it wasn't just like one room. It was true, we have an open space room in the basement and then a room that's like you know, behind a closed doors, so
he got the whole basement. It actually looks great. Like he was able to like get his like metallic swirly floor, which were not cheap. He was able to paint whatever color he wanted. So the rule was I had no say in the basement, but then I got to do the rest of the house. So it was when I tell you, that was the best rule we ever made, because whenever he came up it was like, we should do magenta. I'd be like, so, just referring back to our rule, I got the rest of the house, you get the basement.
Well, it's always annoying when they care about things that you didn't think they would care about. I'm like, oh, did.
You want to say in this like it's some of men like really like the fancies himself an interior designer. I'm like, sir, we lived in your colorful Matchla path for five years. We're not doing that. Like literally we had a green a green laundry room, and an orange kitchen, a magenta living room. I mean it was rainbow city up in that house. And I was like, I'm not doing that here. I want an adult space. Not that space was an adult, but it was very clearly his
like bachelor pattern. He thought he was doing something with all these colors, and I'm like, whatever, we're not doing that here, so but now he loves it now. He's like, you know, I didn't get it before, but I love it now. It's very adult and understated, but but elegant. So see at the end, when I win, we all win.
Is what I think. But it's hard to convince an independent man of that. I'm like, oh, I got the one that pushes back. It's annoying. My mom's so annoying. She's always like I like the way and riy Kue talks back. I'm like, shut up, whose side are you on?
Oh Man?
So Thanksgiving you are you're getting you said you're getting things, geting catered right, yes, but you're hosting at your house.
Yeah, for the first time. I'm excited. So it'll be Superman's family and my family, so we're gonna have a good old traditional Thanksgiving. I'm excited because Vondam, who did my birthday party and our wedding reception, is catering. Not that she'll be there like passing out food, but you know, we'll just go pick it up. But yeah, I'm excited because but her Drell's family, they're gonna bring food on
my side of the family as well. But so everybody will bring food, but I think like the base food, like you know, the macaroni and cheese, collar greens, candy, dam it's a turkey, Like we're gonna just have bodo making because I'm like, well, I'm not gonna do is stress about making my first Thanksgiving when I'm not even like like someone like I can cook. I think people think like that, ain't ever cooks Like I just made
dinner chili, white rice, saltate spinach. I mean, I can cook, but I'm not your throwdown in the kitchen like you know some women like get down, get down. I don't get down, get down. I just here's your food. It does taste good, but I'm not getting fancy. So I'm certainly not making Thanksgiving for the first time, not that I never will, but not this time around, not with his cook and throw down family coming because they cook fair enough.
Also, it's like there's there's pressure. Everyone's got their expectations of Thanksgiving, especially when you're like blending families the way that they've always done it, and you know, like it's I get a little especially because my family, my husband's family, doesn't have traditional Thanksgiving in their family like we did.
Like I did growing up, and it's just, yeah, it's easier. Like, honestly, I think we're going to his cousin's place, and I think we're just gonna like they're gonna get it catered from some you know, like I don't know some like what do you know, stew Lennards. Apparently people are obsessed with stew Lennards. It's like up there with Wegmans, which people are also weirdly obsessed with. People are so weird
about grocery stores. But whatever. Yeah, so they do a whole Thanksgiving dinner and I just agreed with the hostess. I was like, let's just get this thing catered. No one has to cook. I'm certainly not trying to cook, and then you know, the pressure's off and everyone can just enjoy and then if it's not great, you can blame it on whoever made it, not you know, not your family exactly.
And honestly, Vonma cooks really well. I mean obviously that's why she's catering, so it's gonna be delicious. I just kind of hope that there's enough, because both my family and his family are very much to go packers, so so much so that in their their group chat. He had to do like a gentle reminder that the goal packing plates will not be put out until the end of the evening. People will pack and I'm not gonna
lie I've done this. People will pack it to goal plate, put it up and hide it and then go get their regular plate. He wasn't gonna save that night. I said, let me type it for you, because what you're gonna say is not going to be very nice. And he was like, you don't know some of my family members. And I'm like, I know because I'm one of them, so I'm not here to be judging.
You pack it to go plate and hide it. That's so funny, yes, and.
Then they by regular plate like that. By the end of the night, some of the good food's gonna be gone. So I said, well, day, I guess I have to be a good I have to be a good hostess and not do that.
That's a real scarcity mindset to bring to the dinner table at Thanksgiving. I have survived in colonial times.
You put my food up, you know what I mean. First of all, it's terrible. You know, many times when when I'm at someone's house and I've done those Shenanigans and I'm looking for a hiding place for my food, only to see other people's food hidden. I'm like, oh, so we all get down like this. You're open like a cabinet and there's three places in there already.
I'm like, food, that's funny. Now, that's how it is with my dad cooks. It's like, come on, that's just the way it is. It's tradition, definitely, when you go to a party, like it's like the Dominican tradition. There are overlaps. There are overlaps between my Dominican family and my Atlanta Georgia family. That's all I'm going to say. And how they conduct themselves at family gatherings and the aluminum foil has to come out. And if people don't get to take a plate home, then did they really
have a good time? Yes, you get judged.
I'm a little nervous about that. I'm like, I don't know because I told Vonna to cook for forty, but I feel like we're legitimately going to have forty people. I'm like, is that going to be enough? Because you know, I feel like it's not a good Thanksgiving if you didn't get a good size to go, plate to go.
You know, so let's you're not like dead from being so full, like yeah, way of hungry.
Well hungry, and you have to go with to go play, like it's like it's mandatory. But I think that with like his side of the family and my side of the family also bringing additional food, we should be okay. But it's definitely something that I'm nervous about, Like is it gonna be a nuh well.
What else has gone besides the holidays? You're going to tape the real next week?
I sure am so today, Like you're no travel rule, I know, but it's my last it's the only travel that I have scheduled for the end of the year. But I honestly I have not gone anywhere. I think. I feel like the last place I went was maybe a month or so ago, I went to DC. So I honestly have not traveled much this year at all.
And if I have travel, it's been super local, like Philly, DC, you know, New York, Like I was in New York today taping some called an s m C And you know, one day we should talk on the podcast about like ways that folks can make money. I know, influencer is like a dirty word, but if done properly, you can be an influencer that makes a decent amount of money and maintain your integrity because I think there are ways that you can make money online that people are not
hip to. And Lynette cop Fonnie Cock's one of our faiths. She's one of my mentors. She hit me to the game. So I would love to hip our audience to the game of ways that I make money that you probably don't even realize that you know that don't require the super heavy lift. So I did one of those ways today called the SMT a satellite media tour. You make a lot of money in a short period of time and then you go back to your regularly scheduled shenanigains.
But yeah, I go back to the real and then honestly, these days not gonna lie. I just look the opportunities that there are coming. I'm just like not as interested as I used to be. I'm just tired. So maybe it could be the IVF medicine, because they have a new medicine and I think it's like wearing me out. I'm tired. I feel like I'm sleeping all the time.
Well, listen to your body.
Mm hm, that's what That's what someone told me today. I'm like, I'm sired.
I sound like my mom. I'm like, fine, yeah.
My body. You what's what's new with you?
Oh? That's all just prepping, just propping, getting out, trying to stay active, trying to tend like nothing at all is happening. Even though I'm walking around. I feel like I have like a ticking time bombs strapped to my chest and like at any moment it's going to go off. I just don't know when. That's pretty much how it feels.
You know. That's crazy. When you really think about it, You're like, yeah, any day, that's crazy. Even though you're like, I'm prepared, I've done this, I've done that, but I never thought about like what that must feel like. You're like, so we're here now, okay.
It's very I mean, you have to go to the doctor a lot and they like, you know, you get examined a lot, which is very uncomfortable, and they yeah, I guess, yeah, I have prepared a lot, but there's still the sense you haven't done enough and that you're not ready and I don't know how to I think
that's just normal. Like I'm just you know, anyone in this position, you just feel a little bit anxious and and then you I will say, my friends and family have done a really good job maintaining their own like managing their own anxiousness and their excitement, and not like putting that all on me, because that would just you know, stress me out. I got my own feelings to think about. But uh, yeah, no, I'm just I'm just hanging in there. It's nice that the holidays are coming up. I'm looking
forward to it, you know. But we'll see you doing a couple of weeks, man, Dick, Dick.
I will say this, don't do your baby dirty for Christmas, right because my sister, poor, my sister Carol, her birthday is the twenty first of December, so when she was younger, they ustill rolled it all together like your birthday Christmas present. She's like, yeah, no, that's not how that works.
So I don't think I can get away with that. He's too early enough that there's enough distance. If you've got more than two weeks, you can't do that.
No, but her birthday is just a few days before, and I remember that happening and looking at her like, ooh, they did your dirty girl.
Well.
And actually that's why her name is Carol. Are my parents corny Christmas Carol?
That's cute. Actually, don't even get me started on the name I the Lord have Mercy. We don't have a name picked out yet.
Oof.
All right, change is subject. Shall we do some questions?
Yeah? We should do some question Someone actually hit me in the They were like, love the podcast, have a question, but of course I can't find it. But if I find it, I would love to read her question because I know she would be geek if I read it. And I love when people hit me on on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram and we read their question and they're like, you read my question.
So that's always we do read them. We don't always send you messages to let you know, because you know, a lot happens, but we do do read them. Let's take one from the gram. This one comes from a listener who wants to remain anonymous, but has a bit of a predicament about helping her mother out. Good afternoon. She says, I'm in a bit of a panic. My mother and I are immigrants. She came here to allow me to go to school, thus she gave up all
her positions back home. I'm about to graduate next August. However, my mother was recently fired from her job because they said she wasn't learning at the pace they wanted. She's fifty seven years old and terrified she can't get a job because of her age. She put most of her money into my education, and she barely has any savings Right now. With my job, I'm working from four to eleven PM because I'm not fully certified. My pay is
barely minimum wage. I've got one more semester to graduate, but I'm wondering if i should just drop out and help her out. She's an accountant with at least ten years of experience. We're both a little terrified and not sure what to do next. Ah, my heart breaks for them. That's really difficult. I mean, take out the fact that her mother's not from this country originally, although she has
ten years of experience in the States. Working to be fired or let go in your late fifties, it is a vulnerable place to be, no matter how much we want to think that there are tons of opportunities. Agism in the workplace. Is it real? It's so so real. Whether it's intentional or unintentional. People do discriminate against people at that age. So it's a it's tricky, but it's
very tricky. But I feel like sacrificing your own career prospects may not be the And I'm also wondering if she were to drop out of school, what could she do to help, like get you know, for herself, like drop out and get a job maybe is higher paying, but then she puts her own career in hold. And I can't imagine her mom would want her to do that.
She wouldn't because she didn't sacrifice for that quite honestly.
Yeah, I'm wondering. I mean, if they're if you're in the US, I mean, with ten years of experience, she should qualify for unemployment benefits, right. I know that it's not I know it's not permanent. I know it's not obviously doesn't come with you know, health benefits that are super affordable. It may not be what she was making before, but it's something to make ends meet in the meantime.
Did she say if her mother's a citizen.
She doesn't say if she's a citizen or not, just that she has ten years of experience here I'm gonna guess she has some sort of residency, permanent residency or something like that if she's able to work.
And I know this might seem like, I mean, I don't know how super savvy your mother is with like online things, but the truth of the matter is one of the number one things that people ask me for, like my entrepreneur friends, is for an accountant. I'm wondering, you know how maybe your time would be best spent, you know, like going to school finishing, but seeing if you can find folks that are looking for an accountant,
because that's honestly the number one thing. Like I told you, Carlos, my accountant told me that I'm no longer allowed to say his name out loud, even though I just said it, because I have said so many people to him that he is inundated. He can't take on any new clients,
no matter who it is. I mean, there are people celebrities that have reached out to me and they're like, oh, please connect me to Carlos, And Carlos was like, I don't care if it's Oprah herself, well maybe Oprah, but yeah, but you know that he can't take on a new folks so what that lets me know is that somebody who is an accountant that there is money out there and folks are looking for an accountant. And so I don't know if that could give you a little hope
or like how you would connect. There's a group on Facebook called It's by Arsha Jones. It's called like build It, brand It, launch It something like that. Build brand launched by Arsha Jones, Rsha A r Sha and in it are so many new and established entrepreneurs and folks are
looking for an accountant. So that's potential. Like just recently, quite honestly, I was looking not for an accountant to replace Carlos, but I was looking for someone like because Carlos is my big accountant that I meet with quarterly. I was looking for someone on a day to day basis that would be able to help with that. So people are looking.
Yeah, you know, if she's good and you could maybe coach a little bit on establishing herself on the web, you're that's a really good tip. Just reaching out to maybe start locally, even if you guys go to church, or if there's like an online if there's a there's so many local Facebook groups now, you know, I'm in this group called moms of the city I live in, and they're constantly looking for do you guys have an accountant you love and everyone shares their account Do you
guys have a pediatrician? Everyone shares? Do you know where to do this? I'm looking to get furniture refinished, like a million different things. So if you were to join one of those groups and even just like you know, on your mom's behalfs and a message, see if people are looking for a part time accountant or you know, someone to just assist them with their bookkeeping. Yes, I imagine there's a lot of small business owners, entrepreneurs, independent
contractors who could use help. It's the end of year too, so I feel like people are getting their shit together for tax season. So you know, it may be an opportunity. It just may It just may be, you know, a little bit more legwork than going to job boards. I think being a little bit creative might be the answer exactly.
And that's really what I think, and especially like quite honestly, she's got a career that isn't high demand because there are so many new entrepreneurs. So even if it's not like straight out accounting work bookkeeping work. I mean, people are still are starting to understand the value of really having some sort of financial person on their team.
So yeah, help her figure out maybe what a good hourly rate is and to be. And the sad thing is that if you're doing it online, you're not seeing people in person. There's not a chance that your physical like physically like your image as an older woman, which it's sadly enough, could diminish your chances of getting like a second interview. Like online, there's a bit more, I don't know, a greater chance for anonymity at least, and
let your credentials speak for themselves first and foremost. And you know, as far as like trying to fight against ageism in the workplace, I'd love to hear from listeners if you feel like you've encountered or that, or if you have any tips there, because it's something I think about a lot even when I hire, like how to not let my own internal bias get in the way of you know, candidates, you have a ton of experience because you can tell yourself like, oh, they're so senior,
will they be happy in this role? You know they're so they have so much experience, can we afford them, and you may start questioning before you even get them in the door in the first place, and it's just you know, it's genuinely not fair to people. Or you're thinking, I'm not thinking this, but you may be thinking, like, oh, they're close to retirement, how long will they want to work for? Well, people are working into their seventies now,
you know, eighties in some cases. Bernie Anders hello, and half the presidential candidates. But it seems like anyway, yeah, so interesting, and I mean, I wish you guys all the best, But ultimately, I don't think either of us thinks you putting your own education and career on hold when you're so close graduating.
It's not I don't think that that's the because she didn't sacrifice for that, honestly, you know, yeah so and plus two, in the long run, you're going to be able to help her even more, you know, bye by doing what you're doing, which is finishing school.
All right, Anonymous, Well, thank you very much for your question. Let's see. Oh, here's a quick one. We have a listener who wants to know Tiffany mentioned something about her free saving challenge. Where can I sign up or get that information.
Well, you can go to l RC. That's the Live Riture Challenge Save dot com. So l r C save dot com. But if you're someone who's like, honestly, I have five live ritual challenges, I've done a series savings, credit, networth, home buying fundamentals, I think that's it. But if you are just looking for any of the challenges, take one at a time, do not sign up for all of them, or you're gonna get multiple emails all day and then you're gonna be cussing me out. You can go to
Live Richer Challenge dot com. That's for all of them or how so you can kind of pick the one that's best for you. But directly to the Savings challenge, it's lrcsave dot com.
Fabulous And when does it kick off? In January?
Yes, we haven't really started. I mean, like the truth is, I mean, lokey. They're automated, so you can start now if you wanted to. But if you're wanting to do it collectively with like thousands of thousands of women because we support each other, then I'm gonna be doing like a big push at the end of December to get
everyone signed up. So we can do. We could start the first Monday in January together, because literally every single day I'm there with you, holding your hand, making sure you're good, because sometimes you need, especially in the beginning of the year, some of that extra handholding. So so you can start it now, but if you'd like to do it with a with a group, then you can wait until the end of the year when I post and share it and I'll share it on brown Ambition when we're doing.
It perfect though it's not nat season without a Tiffany Liverature Challenge.
I know I almost didn't do it. Honestly, what I've learned, Like today I'm like, I feel like everything is falling apart. But then I was like, oh, that's right. I forgot that when things get hard, then that is a clear indication that I am leveling up. It's been like a little while i've been like at the level I'm actually doing it like the arm the armspring, love never love,
although I cannot dance very well. But so today I was thinking to myself, Wow, everything we're doing is like not doing I'm so used to like things going fairly smoothly, and I'm just like, why are there so many things that are not going so smooth, you know, and all the things I'm working on, not personally that's going great,
but professionally. And then I was like, oh, I forgot that whenever I am like, whenever I've kind of maximized all that I can do at this level, then it gets rough because it means that I've outgrown the tools and resources that this level can find useful. It took me a minute to remember that, like, Oh, these tools and resources, it's not that you're doing anything wrong, they just don't work. It's like it's almost like you know, like, Okay, you're thirteen and you're not wearing an eight and a
half shoe anymore. Is nothing wrong. It's just that you wear a nine shoe and until you get those size nines, it's going to feel uncomfortable. And so that's what's been happening. And today I realized that I addressed it with I had a marketing team call and it kind of had like the aha moment, like, oh, we have to navigate differently because the way we're navigating now is not working because we are we have outgrown those old ways. So that's just kind of a message to anyone who is like,
why is anything going wrong? It's a mercury in retrograde. Perhaps I think it is, But it also might mean that you've outgrown your current tools and resources and it's time to level up and time to adopt new ways to attack new challenges.
I was trying to remember the theme song for Growing Pains because I was going to be clever and sing it, but then I just like brain farted.
What is called page the song?
What is it?
Yeah? I don't know that.
The best is waiting to be But say with the nineties theme songs, they all end up sounding like each other. Like I'll start singing the step by step one end up singing family matters, and then I'm like into full house somehow they all like they all have the same common thread. All right, cool, all right, let's take one more. Since that was a quick question, Let's call this listener
who wants to remain an indomis do you brain fart? Ashley? Okay, Ashley says, And this might be a good question for you, Tiffany, since a little Bertie told me that you launched a business from scratch, She says, I'm a freelancer currently making about forty dollars an hour. My only expenses are living at home, paying two fifty in rent, and buying groceries. But I'm currently bootstrapping my online boutique business. I quit my job in Corporate America, so I know how so
I could do this business. Now. I have about thirty thousand dollars in student loans and about seventeen hundred dollars in credit card debt. The business is taking up the majority of my leftover money after rent and groceries. Do you guys have any advice on what I can do
to begin saving more? Thanks in advance. So she's wanted to bootstrap her business starting from scratch, quit her job has low expenses, which is good, yes, only making forty dollars an hour as a freelancer though, and feeling like she wants to build her business and save at the same time.
Sometimes those things actually are like oil and water. H Yeah, So when you're starting a business, sometimes you have to be okay with the fact that, yeah, Safians is not really gonna happen right now, and I have to be okay with that. Uh. I did not save for the first four or five years of business. It was just enough to be like, okay, head above water, ahead, above water, You're not gonna drown. I'm not gonna let you drown.
And that's what it's like. That's why entrepreneurship is difficult because like traditionally, you know, you work at a job, you make money, you know that you're gonna save, you're smart about it. But with entrepreneurship you kind of have to suspend what would normally be responsible behavior. In that I was like, yeah, so took this money out of my retirement account. Not a good idea, but I did it.
And yeah, I'm not saving right now, and I'm paying the minimum to everything and deferring on my student loans. Not the best idea when it comes to traditional personal finance, but I did it. It doesn't always work out, That's why it's not always a good idea. But if you're saving just even a little bit now, you are way ahead of the game because most folks in the beginning are not saving anything because truthfully, there you know, it's the beginning of their business. So I would say, be
okay with not saving as much. Make sure, like right now, keep your expenses as low as possible. You're like in the beginning stage normally, I don't believe in over sacrifice. There's those such thing as over sacrificed in the beginning stages, like we're not going on vacation, sis, guess what YouTube
could teach you how to do your nails. That's what it looks like in the beginning, until you can get stable income coming in and you get to a space where you're like, Okay, I'm making enough to cover more than just basic life and I'm able to save a little, and then you can rejoin the land of the living. But in the beginning, starting an entrepreneur, starting a business is really you're living alone amongst the dad. We're walking around here like zombies, just trying to make things work.
And here's here's what's going to help you with this feeling of not saving enough. You need to have other entrepreneur friends. Because when I tell you, when I spoke to my regular nine to five friends and I would share like, yeah, so Verizona ain't getting at this. Once, they'd be like clutching up parlativity. Well, when I spoke
to my entrepreneur friends, they're like either, okay. So what I learned is that having entrepreneur friends helped to normalize the craziness of entrepreneurship, and so I felt less crazy. I'm like, oh, you're late as well. Okay, Oh you're not saving okay. Oh you moved to a room, so did I. Oh you haven't driven your car because who has gas money? So you have to reset your expectation of what life is going to look like in the
beginning stages of your entrepreneurship journey. And it's going to help to have other friends who are also going through entrepreneurship because it will normalize what normally would not be normal.
All I would add to that is, so she already is doing so many right things. She's living at home, her expenses are super low, two fifteen rent, buying groceries, And when you think about the advice around how much to save for an emergency, you know, if you're living at home, you're you're risk is so much lower. You know, you don't have a full time job, right you're living at home already. It's not like if you were to lose your job you would have doesn't sound like you
have kids or a family relying on you. So the need for you to have this stockpile of cash for an emergency isn't quite as great right now, and you've given yourself the room that you need to start building your business. And even though you have thirty thousand dollars in student loans and what's seventeen hundred dollars in credit card debt? I would focus on paying that off as soon as you can, first and foremost, and look at that as a as a you know, form of saving
if you can. And then look at the way that you're living as a form of saving too, like what could you be spending if you didn't live at home?
You know?
So you are saving, You're just choosing to put your savings into your business. It sounds like which when you're young and just getting your start, that's acceptable. So I agree with TIF. Take the pressure off to have some big stockpile of cash and focus on what can you do to invest in your business to grow it so that you can fulfill you know, your ultimate goal, which is to be an independent business owner.
And I will the one thing I will say is that I it took me a while to understand this, but I wouldn't put all my emphasis on getting debt free, you know, And it took me, who is like super debt adverse to understand that that. I instead was like, okay,
I can put all because that's what I had. Student loan debt fifty thousand dollars and then I had credit card debt thirty five thousand dollars, and the first stages of when I started my business, I was adamant, like, I put all my extra funds and time and energy that I was making toward getting rid of this debt. So I paid off the credit card debt in like two and a half years. I was like, yes, and guess what, my business was doing nothing because I was
putting all that money into the credit card debt. And not that I shouldn't have paid it, but knowing what I know now, I should have been more moderate with my paydown plan and instead invested that money back into my business. Because then I said, Okay, I'm going to put all that same energy into paying off my student loan debt. And I started and I'm like, okay, you have three in your business and you're not making any money. Like, maybe let's rethink this instead. What if I put the
same energy and funds into the business. And I started to do so, and within the next three years, the business had made me enough that I had the fifty thousand dollars as a lump sum payment to make to the student loan debt. That's what I said about like business operation when it comes to your money is different than what I would normally suggest a regular person working at a regular job, Like normally i'd say go attack
that debt. But as an entrepreneur, I'm saying, have a debt paid down plan that's basically moderate, and you kind of set it and forget it, and then put your energy and money and funds into growing your business, because if you do so, you can potentially make the money to take care of that debt. Because I was I was credit card debt free, but I was still broke.
And by the time I paid off my student loan debt that I was a student loan debt free, but now I had money because I focused on the business. So but that was a hard lesson for me to learn. It took like three or four years of brokeness to realize, Like timply, you have to refocus your effort. If you're living home and you're making this sacrifice, make the full sacrifice like you should be beasting. Like the first year I was lazy with it. I was like, ooh, I
get to nab. I'm an entrepreneur, not being you know, like you should be beasting normally. I'm all for harmony and balance. Not in the beginning. You should be putting the like the best that you have into it to see is this something that could really work? Because the seed you plant now, this is the fruit that you're going to eat later. I have a whole orchard worth of fruit, and I look, it's not because I'm a super beast right now, but it's because I was a
super beast in the beginning. So I'm picking all that fruit now. So put in as much effort as you can see if this thing.
Can work, well said, and I'll just shut up because how can you follow that. I'm just trying to, you know, give you, give you the space that you need to shine. That's all that's all I do.
Sometimes, No, I honestly I feel like we have like an entpreneurshell because I like it's such a I mean, it's such a topic that depending what day you catch me, I'm like, don't get I was telling my sister the other day, like right for the hills, don't do it it's terrible over here, and the other days I'm like, what's cute here? I like it.
So it's the same on the other side. To believe me, it's the same.
On the other side, I have like insurance and security.
Oh, get out of here, everybody. The grass is always greener.
Yeah, this is true, because I was like, I miss having like a regular money come in and I have to worry about thirty people and how they gonna get paid and what the government said, and oh I forgot to send that letter in and now I owe three thousand dollars instead of three hundred, and I'm like, oh my god. Sometimes it's so much, and the other days I'm like, eh, okay, look at me out here doing it.
Like honestly, it's a roller coaster relationship. I feel like I'm just in a I'm in a crazy relationship with entrepreneurship.
I think it's going pretty well from my perspective for you anyway, all right, guys. Well, as a reminder, you can hit us up on Instagram at Brandonbisson Podcast with your questions or you can email us at Brandonbisson Podcast at gmail dot com. Booster break ah.
We gotta boost ah we gotta break. You've fend the booty, fend a break.
I'm gonna do a boost this week because I don't know how these companies make money. But if you're I love sending holiday cards, but I hate like the work. It sounds like a lot of work to get send out holiday cards, et cetera. And this is not a promotion for any one particular company, how you know, But I'm going to name a company. They're not a sponsor anything like that. But every year I just go to like either Shutterfly or Snapfish. I don't know how they
make money. They always have like eighty percent off promo codes and I managed to get like all you do is slap a picture they put like a holiday greeting on it. You can like upload your address list and get envelope with addresses printed on them. And it's so cheap to get like cards made. And it makes me feel like a real adult when I can send out holiday cards. And so shout out to those services and their promo codes, and I hope they don't go out of business ever.
Ever, ever, so I have never said howdy cards. I'm like, oh, that'd be so cute. Week, So what's the company's Shutterfly.
There's there's a bunch out there, so I usually I toggle between snapfish or Shutterfly. I just got like a bunch of thank you notes made for my baby shower on Snapfish. And of course I did it like three in the morning when I woke up, and it took me no time, and I think I got sixty percent off, and then I was able to get I got a whole I got a whole book, like a photo book made like a professional photography book, like where they take
your photos and blow them up and it's beautiful. And I got that made for like forty bucks and it has something like eighty pages. I don't know. There's just I don't know how that.
But all you have to do is Google.
If you're going to these sites, don't spend full price. There's just no excuse. They'll even have the promo code, like if you go to their they have like a discount page or or have it like at the bottom of the page or even at the top banner, you know, promoting it. Don't ask me how they make money, but I guess the margin's really good on these products, but it's really and then you'll get it within a week.
I feel like it always comes super fast. So don't do it old school and go to Papyrus and overspend on because I used to do that all the time. Go to Papyrus and like spend a ridiculous amount of money on you know, the physical cards because they can just do it for you. It's it's fabulous.
Yeah, that does sound fabulous.
What about you?
I am going to hmm, you know, I want to boost. This is how they see, so let's be positive. I'm gonna boost making connections. So one of my sisters is like really like into self improvement right now. She took one of those have you ever heard of like momentum. It's like it's like one of uh, there's another one that's a popular landmark. Have you ever heard a landmark?
It's like landmark, what.
It's if that's what it's called. It's like one of these, Like it's like a self improvement typically it's like a weekend and you get to learn more about yourself and you know, like things that you're doing that are that are in alignment with your desired outcome and things that are not. And one of like every time she came back,
she really enjoyed it. Every time she came back. We talked about some of the things that she learned, and one of the things that she said that she learned is like, really that relationships are everything, literally everything, and sometimes like for me, because sometimes I'm I feel so pulled and overwhelmed that when I get a moment, I
won't net with new people. So like, yeah, I hang out with my friends and obviously my family, but sometimes and someone's like, oh, I'd love to go out to lunch, I'm like, nah, girl, Like my default is like I'm gad now, let's still found call. And I had the
opportunity to do that yesterday. I'm working with this brand that I really like and they invited me to dinner, and my knee jerk was like, nah, girl, I'm good, Like I'm just gonna come do my thing tomorrow and you know, like y'all that's what y'all paying me for.
But then this other part of me remembered when I was speaking with my sister and she was like, you know, making the effort to connect with folks just for connecting sake, And so at first I said no, and then I was like, you know what, I will go to dinner and it was like such a good time. You know. It wasn't like I mean, we didn't talk about business. It was myself, my agent, the brand, and the brand's partner,
and I was just like wow. We talked about everything from motherhood to being a woman in business to being a woman of coloring. But like, it's just it was just such a good time. And I thought to myself, I would have missed out on this because you know, I get it. Sometimes it could be a lot that's going on, but how you alleviate the feeling of a lot that's going on, it's really through interpersonal connections. And it was just a good reminder that you know, everything's
not like a business transaction. Sometimes people are just wanting to connect to connect, and that connecting is really what it's what makes life worth living and that I don't want to jump from transactions to transaction. So just a boost to you know, interpersonal connecting and making that a priority and you know, saying yes to more in person connections because like I said, people ask all the time like oh my gosh, I'm gonna be in Jersey. I would love to connect and I'm like nope, They're like
you don't even know what I'm coming. I'm like nope, because I just sometimes, like I said, I feel so around. I'm like lunch or this bed, this bed, and I'm like, say, if any get the house. So if you're needing that kick in the butt, this is your sign. If you need a sign, get out of the house. Connect with folks. Everything is not a transactions. Sometimes it's just connecting for connecting sake. And what ended up happening is that the brand Liaison loved me so much that I could totally
tell they're going to use me again and again. And that wasn't the attention it was like but she was like, girl, you are amazing. Yesterday was so great hanging out with you. I cannot wait for us to work with you over and over again. I was like, what, okay, So, yeah, you don't know what you're missing out on when you when you don't connect with folks.
And especially because i mean just on a personal note, like it's the holidays and people, you know, depression is kind of higher during the holidays, and even just checking in with like friends and people even have talked to you in a while, you don't know what kind of impact you can be having just to catch up over coffee because some people it's a downtime for some people, or a stressful time and check in with loved ones. I'll add to that, but that was a yeah, that's excellent, good point.
Thank God.
Well, thank y'all for another great show. We will see y'all next week, one last show, and we'll maybe see you the week after. It'll depend on this little sir inside of me. I don't know.
Hello for me this side have a.
New boss, how I feel.
It sounds like hello for me this sid oh. I can't wait to meet you. So I know he's gonna be.
So he'd better be. Not a