Time Is Something You Can't Get Back (BA Q&A)

if she should save or pay down debt. Okay. Paying the debt now though, would mean we would have to use our credit card to pay down on a used car next year. We're trying to get a second job. Okay. So queen, it's sounding like one, you have a lot of credit card debt that is stressing you out.

what it's all sounding like. Okay, so queen, first things first, it sounds like, and this is no judgment, that some of to your own admission, the credit card debt that you find yourself in is not for just day to day living, you know, because you share that like you've kind of like overspent, you know, and that happens, you know sometimes, you know, we don't always exercise the full

control that we have over our credit cards. So it sounds like you might need to just say, you know, we need to cut out the usage of these credit cards because it's gonna be very difficult to pay off credit cards if we are if you're currently using those credit cards. So unless you're using credit cards for like necessities like groceries or medicine or things you absolutely need, and I probably, honestly you will cut my credit cards up.

I would go as far as to call a credit card company to say lost my card or would like for you to change the number on my credit card so they're not saved on your computer and your phone like I'm sure they are currently.

give or take. But you're I'm sure your interest rates for your credit card debt twenty maybe even thirty percent. So if the credit cards are costing you twenty percent and savings is only going to make you four percent, then you're probably gonna want to put more money toward paying down that debt because it's costing you. It's that that is so expensive that it's costing you whatever savings

you would have saved. So I would focus most of my time and energy, certainly set aside a little something for emergencies, but most like if I had one hundred dollars, I might do like twenty dollars savings eighty dollars credit card debt, that kind of like mix, because your credit card debt is just costing you so so, so so so much, and getting a second job, you know, might

not be a bad idea. But before you get a second job, I want you to sit down and look at your budget to see, like do we actually make enough to cover what we need to cover? Because I would hate for you to take on additional work when

really it's a matter of budgeting, you know. So I would sit down and look at my budget and ask myself, like, okay, like the amount of money that we're making, you know, based upon like what we have to spend to maintain our lives, there's actually enough money here, it might be, and if not, then certainly you can look at you know, looking at additional income. And then my last final thing is is that, like I shared this on the Wednesday show, is that this year I have my annual Live with

Your Challenge. It starts January fourteenth, but sign up for the free challenge ends January. No, it starts January fifteenth, Monday, but sign up end January fourteenth. And so I encourage you and anybody who has any credit issues, Queen, to go to l r C Credit LRC credits dot com and sign up for the challenge. We already have three hundred thousand people plus signed up. You will not be alone. There will be other people struggling with credit. Week one

you learn how is your credit even calculated? Week two how to grow and your credit score, and week three how to maintain credit so you never find yourself in this position again. It's totally free. It's a three week like email course. It comes with an app that's free as well that we just built. And so I think that's going to help you as you navigate your credit journey, so you find yourself not in this business sit again. So LRC credit dot com. The link will be in

the show notes. But I wish you well clean anything I forgot Mandy, get.

you're getting saved transportation. And sometimes safety comes before logic and credit card bills, you know. And if you're in a situation where you might need to like consolidate debt if it's too much, if you're in over your head, you know, look for ways to consolidate debt, do a balanced transfer to make it a little bit less cumbersome, make it less stressful, less expensive, help you kind of

tackle it. But you gotta. Yeah, Like I agree with Tiff, and I think the thing with budgeting that's so scary when you have that kind of debt is like emptying out the drawer and looking at all the stuff that's in it. Ooof I think, yeah, that's that's gonna be the hard part. But lock arms with your partner and do it together, because you ain't going to get out of this you're doing it. You're getting into the hole together, but you're not going to get out without being together

if you're not both on the same page. So I wish you so much luck and thank you that question real quick.

At the time, Crossroad was looking for a job for over a year and said that she left her full time job due to racial incidents, you know, proliferate by her supervisor. Is that the right word? Proliferiding man done? Her supervisor was racist, and colleagues left her feeling unsafe. She had over a decade of full time work experience and currently yeah, and currently she's a full time PhD student and she's been working as a graduate assistant to

make ends meet. Now she's getting back into the job market and feeling like not only is she having trouble getting an offer, but because she's you know, a PhD graduate assistant. She's finding the pay is not matching her level of experience, and she was really trying to find a position. So her ultimate question is that should she find roles in her current field, the field that she had left because of the toxicity, or make a career switch and rebuild. Now we're in the future now and

Crossroads sent me an update. First, she said thank you to our advice. I guess we responded to two of her questions, and she says, I took your advice and I leaned into my network as I hadn't for quite some time in my search. To my surprise, well, a lot of folks didn't know I was looking for a job since I'm still in school. They were very helpful and I yielded several leads. I landed an interim role in a different field that lasted for two months through

the end of this year twenty twenty three. It was a great opportunity. I learned a lot in a short period of time, and it even sparked an entrepreneurial flame that I planned to invest in within the coming year. Twenty twenty four. Now has come with a bang, I receive. I have received two job offers within the first days, first few days of the new year. Both are what

I specifically prayed for, and I'm immensely grateful. My experience on the long term job search has taught me so much about myself and given me clarity on my career path moving forward. Thank you so much for both your answers and support for AFAR. You made me feel seen and understood during a time when I felt just the opposite. May God continue to bless you both. Your work on Brown Ambition is a ministry. This is the best part. Signed no longer at a crossroad.

what's going on? So is that like that's not even that bad really because I was going to say that, you know before you know, prior to this, you know, three four months maybe, but like, so is that typical that kind of like the higher you get in your career, the more education you get, that like replacing that job that you're seeing people take six months or longer to find replacement.

and now we're leveling out. The job market is really strong right now, but people don't really feel that way because it's taking a little bit harder, a little bit longer to find job, not a little bit a lot of bit longer to find jobs. It feels like there's a fewer of them out there, even though job numbers are still exceeding expectations and The reason is why this is kind of what a normal job market feels like.

I looked at this data for my book because I'm still doing that writing a book, and I think the average there's a stat the average. Let me just look it up real quick. Okay, so this is a stat I just cited in my book coming to a library in bookstore near you at some point in the future. I don't know, I got to write it first. How long it actually takes to find a job is about

five months? Really, yes, that's on average. Okay, So I think it's not to deter people from you know, being on the lookout, but this is I do know the trick, as Crossroads has found, of speeding up that timeline, working your network at all times. And I find that people who shelter in school or not shelter in school, but they're going back to school, they're getting an MBA, they're

getting a PhD, they're doing a certificate program. It feels like you're doing a thing for your career when you're in school and you are, you are elevating your skills, you're making yourself more attractive as a job candidate. But the worst thing you can do is also not engage with your network and keep them engaged. The minute that crossroads we just heard from her opened her mouth and said to her network, I am looking for work. She had a decade of a decade of experience. It's coming

back to me, not what I said for at the time. Like, with a decade of experience, you met so many people across that timeline. They need to know that they can help you, that you're looking for help. And yeah, so I would just say to anyone who's facing or you know, thinking about quitting or pivoting into a new field, or you know you've been let go unfortunately, Yeah, three to six months, I feel like is a safe That's why they say three to six months of your income save it.

But if you want the cheat code, the only cheek code I can think of when it comes, it ain't your resume. It sometimes isn't even the skills that you can attain. It is making great relationships over the course of your career, investing in them like seeds, seeds that you don't plan to sew until you absolutely need it, and there's no.

It worked for me too. And here's how, because I think it's great for people to hear that you know they're not alone, and then you know there is light at the end of the tunnel, so every tunnel.

but Kevin is our favorite. Kevin was a mail listener, I mean, is still a mail listener who We had him on the show because he used to write in the most incredible questions starting with his wife and his advice for her about her career, which we had to set him straight on. But I just love that budget Bro has listened and wants to be besties with Kevin because based on his question, I think they would get along just fine. All right, budget Bro says, I'm thirty one.

I work in the chemical refining industry as an analyst at an amazing company in Louisiana. I make about one thirty five a year, but I can add twenty k to that and make one fifty five, one hundred and fifty five thousand dollars a year with overtime. Right now. I'm married, we have two toddlers. Oh God, bless I don't have any debt aside from student loans. We own a home. I'm leaning in, he said. I am leaning into my middle aged, suburban dad era and I am excited. Yes, I love you, Budge bro.

in the same department, but it's more than project management side. However, this would mean a pay cut to about one hundred and twenty thousand dollars and I wouldn't be eligible to for overtime. So just to get back with the numbers, he's making one thirty five k base. He can get up to one fifty five K if he does overtime. This would be going down to one hundred and twenty k base. But here's the thing about the new role. The new role is a four day work week, no nights,

no weekends. Right now, he's doing shift work, which is a mix of days and nights, twelve hour shifts and about total about fifteen days a month. So he's going to be going from that to a four day work week if he takes this pay cut. He got two babies at home and two toddlers at home, Okay, he says, the money isn't really the issue, as we are living below our means as it is. I have also been able to get a lot of schoolwork done during my ten to fourteen days off a month, as well as

when I work nights. I would like to start an MBA program in the spring, and the new role would cut into that the time that he has okay, ooh, I missed this part right now, he's working like fifteen days a month, but they are twelve hour shifts, a mix of day and nights. Okay, So he's going from like an unusual hardcore schedule that's like fewer days a month. This would be more of like to you know, all day normal work day, but for four days a week.

He says, what should I do? Should I take this new role that would allow me to be home nightly with my wife and kids, or wait until I'm done with my MBA and apply for another role. Then I'm torn, Thank you, budget.

want to be you know, I don't know. Like for example, when we were kids, my dad got his master's his NBA economics or in finance, and then his bachelor's and economics or finance. Right, so he really wanted professionally to be on the stock market, like you know, But then my mom had one girl, two girls, three girls, five girls, and he had to make a decision based upon who

did he actually want to be. Certainly he wanted to be a stockbroker and make a ton of money, but he really also because he didn't have a present father, he wanted to be a present father, and so instead he took finance jobs that were nine to five. Ended up being like the CFO for a small nonprofit and then the CEO of that small nonprofit, and it didn't pay nearly as much because as nonprofits are opt not to do. But my dad used to take us to school in the morning, used to pick us up from

school because he got out at a reasonable time. He was super hands on, almost two hands on. I'm like, damn, daddy can agree, right. But he that decision because he said, with all these girls, he wanted to make sure they had a strong male figure in his life. And he decided that that this desired outcome outweighed the desired outcome for more money. So certainly we were because of that. You know, it was sometimes life was a little rough

because it was expensive raising five kids. So for you, Kevin, it's not Kevin, who's this?

we were able to have a very present father. And the truth is I am the budgetiesta as a result of the education my father gave me about personal finance, there wouldn't be no budget. Needs to imagine had he chosen the stock market and more money, you know, certainly I would be a girl with a lot more money, but not the knowledge that he imparted on me because

he was physically here. So that's what I just say, is that choose from that place and then align your job decisions and back to school with the life and how you want to show up as a man. You know.

I'm glad that you went ahead and applied for because I think a lot of people will just wait and think, well should I what if? What if? And I'm like, just apply so you have something to like, something real to compare to, like an actual, real life, concrete option that you can choose between rather than just the idea. So you're getting your MBA. You're going to put in your you know, you're going to put your hat in the ring for this position if you get it. Here's

what I will say to you. There's no wrong answer here. You can take the position. And I feel like in your field you have highly specialized skills. You're going to get an MBA. You you said that you're you know this, this job that you're doing now is more like you know, shift work, and it's it sounds to me almost like

you're a day laborer in the job. I know that you're not a day laborer, but just as like a you know, as an analogy, like sort of like a day laborer, you're paid for your time and for the specific skill that you have. And this like more management type operations, project management type role that could lead down, you know, a career path with more avenues and more branches on that tree. That makes a lot of sense. And if you want to pursue that, I feel like

you should. You're only thirty one. Go try it out, and then here's the thing that you have to think about, Like, Okay, so what if I don't like it? What if four day work weeks? You know, I think I get more time with my kids, but actually I preferred only working half a month, even though they were really rigorous shifts.

You get to try it out and then you can compare, and I feel like, because of your unique skill set, you can always go back to doing that fifteen hour, sorry, fifteen day like more the overtime, the hourly work that you were doing before. I don't think you need to. It doesn't mean that if you choose this path it has to be the forever path. But I do feel like you'd be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't take on a new opportunity and try something different and

get that experience. And like you said, I like that you're thinking about your career with the company that you're at. You love where you work. I mean, you got this great foundation for your life. I think you can afford to try something a little bit different, and I would say if you and again this goes back to what I was saying about crossroads and other career pivoters. When you're getting an MBA, I don't want you to wait until you get that degree to then start looking for

other opportunities. This could be a great way for you to get some project management experience while pursuing your MBA and then when you graduate, you don't have to go find a job if you want to do project management work and start from scratch, like they can say, well, you've got this great MBA, but do you have any project managements experience, because that is what very narrow minded recruiters and hiring managers will do when they get resumes.

But you can have that experience, you know, on your resume, and that can be not only, you know, a way to make you a more attractive candidate, but it can also give you an opportunity to make connections with people, build relationships through your program, you know, with hiring managers recruiters that can serve you down this you know, long fruitful career that you're you know, building for yourself. So I just want to give you permission to try it

out and see what happens. Hopefully your partner, your wife agrees with me because she's in this too. Yeah, and whatever you do, even though you're you know it would be a pay cut. I know you acknowledge that. But time is something you just can't get back. And having just white knuckled my way through seven months without consistent childcare, I wouldn't recommend it, but I kept doing it. I

don't know why. It's it's hard, but you have to like what I think about the time is I'm not going to get an opportunity like this again to be around my newborn, my baby, my infant, and my and be there for drop off and pick up with my son. And although homeboy I just told dad today his dad I was like my husband, I was like, We're gonna add an hour to Rio's pickup time because I'm really enjoying this be at home. He got mommy at four pm,

but let's try five. But anyway, that time is really great, and your kids will change, Your kids will grow, they're going to need you less and then maybe you can change your schedule according to that. But yeah, I love what Tiff you said about like building the career around the life that you have now and just know that

it can change. You're in charge of it, so you can change, you know, you change your mind down the line and make a different choice depending on what your family needs and what you need moving forward.

advice for everyone. And this is the advice I'm trying my heart is to lean into myself, is to determine the life that I want and to make everything else fit professionally, to make it fit, you know sometimes, you know, obviously you have to make some concessions, and that's normal, you know, but I don't want to be led by the business and the career and the you know, like

that that's the only place I make decisions from. I've done that, and although it's led to certainly a significant amount of success, but also a significant amount of stress. You know, I always think to myself, like, you know, you want success, but how will it meet you healthy, happy whole or stressed, like not even able to enjoy it, not being able to even physically enjoy it because you're in such a bad state. And so, yeah, so we

wish you well, Budget Bro. You know, Bro, any other bros you can write it.