It's time for the b a q a A to b a q a which you say to be a q a Manda to be a q a with Tiff and.
A to b a q a A welcome around, a vision question and answers. You have questions, We have some answers.
But we're not your attorney, your doctor, your mama, your papa. Which is two super smart brown girls who know a thing or two about business, entrepreneurship, money, career and a little sprinkling of life or whatever.
You know. So if you have questions, you know, go ahead and ask us. But yeah, yes, but.
So this EPI, we're going to do a little bit of money and a little bit of money in your life, a little all. But I remember that's the I do remember a middle Yes, indeed, I don't remember who that was about how boys or something.
I don't remember two thousand and one, five thousand.
So I'm gonna do We're gonna do a half of business half a money question.
Let's start with.
This is not a specific business question that was in the You know, if you want to send us an email brand a Bishionpodcasts at gmail dot com, want to slide in the DMS on I g brand ambishon podcast or go to brandabision podcast dot com and click contact us. This is just something like because I just coach a lot of black and around women in business and this comes up a lot, So I figured i'd address it and you made it a talk through in and then we'll
answer money questions. Question what is the difference between leadership and management? This is good because whether you work, you know, a nine to five or regular career job, or you are a business owner, this comes up a lot because I find that a lot of people really struggle with leadership.
That this has come a lot.
One of my men tease, she has been struggling a lot actually in her job with leadership. This is kind of like not her first leadership role, but certainly you know, this is probably one of her more in depth leadership roles. And she's having a hard time because she didn't get to pick her team, which is not abnormal in leadership. Oftentimes, like if you own a business, you get to pick your team, but oftentimes if you're hired, the team is already there and the team is now really like her
that much. They muted and so how long it's been like just.
A few months.
Okay, you know, so to be to be fair, you know, my friend, she's not the warm and fuzzy type, and she's very much like I come here, I do my work. She's really smart, obviously, just really smart does her work. And so one of the reasons why they hired her is because they felt like, you know this, this particular department lacks structure, and she's very organized, very structured. Here's what we're going to do. All her ideas are amazing
and great. I was like, oh, this is great, but basically the team that she's been tasked to lead refuses to do any of her ideas, and she's not getting as much support from her supervisor as far as, like I guess.
I guess the support.
She's thinking of bringing the hammer down, being like you've got to do the things that she's saying. And I said, well, even if your supervisor did that, they would undermine you at every turn.
This every turn. So I said that it sounds like.
You are approaching it from a place of management and not from a place of leadership, and it sounds like you have a team that does not trust you, you know, And I said, what is the feedback that the team is giving you. And she was like, well, the feedback they kind of gave too about her through her supervisor is that like she's not she's not. She doesn't listen to like you know, our I is and our you know. And I said, okay, well it's that legitimate feedback, and
she was like, I guess. So she's like, not that I don't listen to the ideas, but I guess listening for the sake of just like a hah hah do what I said, or listening for the sake of integration into the solutions.
And I said, have you integrated any of their solutions?
She's like, not really, because if those things worked, they would been doing it before I got here.
So I can understand that perspective.
But the problem is is that like you're coming in with like, here are six new things we're going to do, and they're like, I don't want to do that. So anyway, my advice that I gave her is that you have to build trust first. And the way to build trust is this great book by Franklin Covey, and he talks about that you actually don't earn trust, you give trust
and then you receive it back. And so what it sounds like is that her team is like, it's clear that you don't value what we bring to the table, and it's clear that you don't trust us to do our jobs, and so we're not going to show up for you. And you know, at first she was kind of defiant, like, well, that's all right, because I'm the bulls.
I could do whatever, not realizing.
That if the team gets together, they are slowly pushing her out.
And it's worky.
That's feel like a common enemy to make you really get along with your colleagues. It's the best morale and the morales only because you guys have like something big and common and you're like, yeah, we all we all hate her, Okay.
Cool. You know when they're at the meeting and.
You know, the flag is like step while you while you're doing the meeting, especially, oh my god, don't let it be a virtual meeting. They are. They are.
The girls are waving, hey ba fan, We're gonna take a quick break and we'll be right back.
So now my friend is like, what do I do now?
I said, now, you have to do the work of leadership versus management, which is you have to start to build trust. You have to one. It's like, one, you can't bring in sick, new different things that people are going to do. That's overwhelming, you know any people, Yes, change that work girl, And then the change has to
be collectively decided on. You know. I said, like, one of the best things one of the tools that I use for the budget Neista is I'll say, here is the big overall goal, and I Am not going to make the decision of how we're going to get there, but here's the vision. Let's do just the brain dump or we all, based upon your expertise, kind of talk through.
Some of the ways we could reach this overall goal.
So we have an overall financial goal, for example, and I brought like my leads and some of my thought leaders on the team, and they were like, what about this? What about that? And everyone got to say, well, based upon like George is the head of financials, based upon the financials, that might make sense, and Tam is head of LRA, but l Ray is going to need this, like logan is all content well.
And content, So everybody got to kind of share.
And in the I kind of had in my head that the direction I thought we should go in in order to hit our income goal because since we fell so short last year, I had an idea in my head, but I told my I'm not sharing it into the end. And what we ended up with is not the idea I had in my head, not even ghosts. But it's way better and everyone's on board because we collectively decided
this together. So it's not a Tiffney plan, it's a team plan because one they felt heard, two they feel supported, and they're like, I feel valued because this ain't even a plan that Tifney thart. We're going to do the plan that we've decided together. And now everybody is like go, Like I can see the uptick and energy because everyone's like, go, go go.
We're working our plan.
And so that was a suggestion that I gave is that, like, you know, wipe everything away, say this is the you know, like our lead has picked this core goal.
For us to accomplish. How do you think we should accomplish it?
And create a collective team plan and then what part of the plan do you want.
To take team members?
And everybody kind of picks their part, and then you know you might infuse if you want to fuse some of these tactical components here is the sheet that I created for us to keep track of the plan that is your you know, because that's her thing, and she's like really like organized, and that's one of the organizational
tools she wants to introduce. So you can introduce this organizational tool into a team plan that's been collectively decided on and so yeah, So I just was like, so, I don't know, what are your thoughts, like, what have you seen this work in leadership versus management? And some mistakes maybe that you've made Mandy along the way.
Yeah, I think I turned into a really brilliant leader by the end of my time in corporate. I'm just gonna say it. I love the way that I led. My team loved me, I loved him. We had respect. I gained it all. However I was. I had so many different experiences. I went from being able to build my team to then inheriting like twelve new people and an acquisition who were already suspicious of everything that my
company was, including me. I've been younger than people that I've managed and you know, and dealt with that whole like age gap difference and building still managed to build respect in the way that I did it. I mean we don't have a ton of time to like go through all of that. But one of the first things that I the reason I asked, you know how long she's been there is you said about a few months
or so. The first few months as a manager, you should be doing nothing but listening, setting up one on ones, building rapport understanding, not assuming that they are the reason that there's no good system and they're not being efficient, but letting them tell you why things are the way that they are, how do things currently run? Do You can't go in and just hear a story from your
manager kind of summarizing everything. You need to like get in there in the trenches with them, and you can't make the assumption that they don't know what they're doing. They're already going to feel like you come in thinking
that they're dumb dumbs. It kind of reminds me of like if you're steeing like the whole trope of like the white teacher going to like an underprivileged school and they I bet they walk in and make assumptions like, oh, these kids probably can't read or whatever, and that already makes the kids feel like shit. They're like, hey, it's that we are not intelligent. It's because these textbooks are ten years old and we don't get resources and all that. So you need to go in there and start for
level of respect. They can earn it, but let's go ahead and give the benefit of the doubt. So going with trust, you have to also as far as a leader. Good leaders care about the ways that their employee's best work. And you may have workers who really don't care to be called on in a meeting for their feedback. They may want to think about feedback and write a team later. You have workers who are going to be the first
to raise their hand and speak out. But then you got the folks who are more quiet, who can be overlooked. So I say get people by themselves and really get to know what they're going through. Because you've already done some damage in your first few months, I think that the first thing you should do is to have a big meeting to apologize and say, hey, I take ownership for kind of coming in with, you know, guns blazing and trying to make some changes. I want to do
things differently and I need y'all's help. I'm gonna and tell them what you're going to do. I'm going to have you know, a half hour one on one with each of you guys individually. Then we're going to come and come together and have some touch points and have some meetings, and we are going to fix this as a team. I can't do it without you start from scratch, because you can't go back to your first impression. It was already a bad one. And you can't ask your
supervisor to lay a hammer down. You want them to all quit, Go ahead, try that's what's going to happen. Yes, you need to take ownership yourself as a leader. You can't go to your bandager and ask them to fix things for you. They didn't hire you for that. They hired you to fix the problem for them, you know what I mean. You have to make them look good by fixing it, and your team has to make you
look good, you know, implementing these new strategies. So that's your first Your first stop is your apology tour, and there's and you know what, it is not bad to apologize. I it's never You're not going to lose their respect by not by apologizing and showing weakness. It I think is a sign of strength that you can admit when you were wrong and just ask for a new beginning and do things different.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's not easy because I think people don't realize that, like, leadership is not a bad I said this.
It's like the reason why I was giggling is because it reminds me of me trying to like manage my four year old, Like he does not care to listen, and it's I try to you know, Me and Enrique were like dictators like no, you can't do that, No you can't do this, Sit here, sit there, And I'm like, now if when I'm really impatient, that's how I try to parent.
And it does not work.
Does not work because he's me and yeah, reincarnated as a four year old, and he's very stubborn and like, so I have to build his trust in other ways, like hey, let's yes first and then you know, so it's not unlike.
Leadership is collaborative.
That's the thing I think that you know, I think it's almost like it's almost like you know, when you're learning to like you think, well, you're gonna drive a car, You're you're steering, really think you go back and forth back or forth, back and forth. It's like, yeah, nobody drives a car like that. And so it's like some people think, like on the on the surface, if they see if I'm a far that leadership, they have a cartoon version of what they think leadership is, where it's like, oh,
I'm the boss, you just do what I say. And it's like, yeah, no, in real life, it actually doesn't work that way, or people just won't work for you, or you'll get people who will stay because they have no place else to go because they're not good, but the good people will be gone. And truly good leadership gets people like excited. They feel autonomous. They know that you don't care as much about the how as long
as it's done. You know, they feel like I'm collaboratively working with you to like get stuff done, and they're part of a larger goal, like there's a larger mission of foot in that and if they play a valuable role in making sure that mission happens. I'm reading like you know, like y'all know, I'm reading that ten X is greater than two. We's in chapter six it's all
about creating a self managing team. And there was like, you know, just really great feedback about like what does it look like to be a really good leader.
And so I had her.
I was like, girl, don't read the best and just skip to chapter six. Not so hopefully I'll be able to give some updates about how it's going for her. Fingers crossed.
That's the book.
Recommendation is Dare to Lead by Brene Brown, the First ninety Days by I don't know who, just google it. I was one of the books I read when I joined my team. And anyway, Oh, and ask your boss for some professional development. Yeah, fund, find a conference, find a seminar. You guys, we're gonna take a quick break, Tiffany, does that sound good?
And Dad have to plug in my computer because it's about to die, so in the.
Meantime put it on life support. We'll be right back, BA fan with one more Q and one more A. Okay, BA Fan, we are back with another ooh, mysterious anonymous question, and so let's jump into it. Hey, I'm new to the pod and I love y'all. This is probably a dumb question, but my husband and I fight about money all the time. It's miserable. We have credit card debt we're paying off. But once we pay the debt off, then what do we do. Oh, oh, okay, we have
credit card debt we're paying off. But once we pay it off, then what do we do? Combined? We make two hundred and fifty K a year, which I feel like is a lot of mone but we're constantly asking where does it all go when our debt is paid off? Do we get a CPA? Do we get a financial planner? We need help with everything from a budget to how much we should invest, to how much we should be saving. We need someone to tell it to us, like we're stupid. Where do we start when the debt is paid off? Thanks?
This is so real.
Yes, I love this. We need someone to tell like we're stupid.
Well, obviously you guys are not stupid, you know, but I remember maybe you were telling me, like a long time ago, when you had hired Helen and your financial planner. She was like the tie breaker, you were like, and sometimes she would side with the rika. You're like, oh wow, girl.
Sister planner. Yes, that's exactly what I was speaking.
It's fine once in a while, they're going to have to give the guy a win, you.
Know what I'm saying.
I think even she knew that. Let me let Enrique feel included, but you will get nowhere to get like you. I always have this analogy of like me and Rique. Sometimes it's like we are holding hands while we're each trying to go different directions at a crossroads, like we're constantly and we're just like yanking each other like this way, No, it's this way.
I know.
You know, you get absolutely nowhere. You just do you feel like dumb dumbs, which is how you feel, and that's how I've felt many times. Financial planners help so much because they are objective. Yea, yeah, objective, and they can help. It feels so much less like, so much less fraught and there's no blame. You know, they're just looking at the facts. And I think that would be completely helpful to you in addition to a financial planner, like reading books on your own, yeah, can be really
helpful for your education. Tiffany's book is like the foundation that I feel like it sounds like you need and you're part with money, Get it with money dot Com. Get that book, then get the workbook. You know, if you're anything like my husband or your husband's like mine, you're gonna be the one who wants to read books and he's like I'll red it stuff, read and find
out about investment. But you have your style. He has his just trust with the financial planner that it will help lead you guys in the right direction.
You go right And I say this that like yeah, so introducing someone to help kind of like God, just do it.
And here's the thing.
You don't have to wait until the debt is gone, like you can start next.
I know you said, what are we doing? We're debt free.
Since you don't have to wait, you can start to look for So I have I partner with this organization called wealth Ram.
I think it's called But if you go to is it your money match, I'll always forget.
So the way it works because a lot of people ask where do you find Well, there's a bunch of places, but I like the wealth Ramp your money match. Let me just make sure that that's what the name of the side is. Your money mets dot com.
Your money match dot com. Let's see if it comes.
Your money that's wealth Ramp.
Yes, I don't think it's your money match.
It's called money match.
I did so your money mess dot com is like, so if you go to your money mess dot com, I partner with this company that if you like, you fill out some like you know, questions that you and your your partner will fill out or you can do them by yourself or whatever, and they will match you based upon what you say to up to three different financial certified financial planners.
That was critical. That's why I partner with them.
Certified financial planners are the gold standard of financial planners, you know, So think about a financial advisor is a teacher. Lots of people can be a teacher, but a certified financial planner is a university tenured professor.
So it's like the gold standard of financial planners.
And they have to they have a fiduciary responsibility, mean where they got to put your interest first.
They have to have continued education.
There's a bunch of stuff that they have to do in order to become a certified financial planner.
And most financial advisors are not.
So one you're going to look for that and there the reason why I created a money match is because I give you all these tools that you can use to help that out the right financial planner. The tools are free. You know, Like here's something called like I call it your so called financial life where you kind of fill out this, like what.
Are all your finances?
So when you look for a financial planner, you can share it with them and they can see if they even are a match with you. But even questions to ask ustin financial planner, So that way before you bet the three people that they suggest to you, you know you are like fully like, Okay, this is a question that we're going to ask. We know exactly what we're
looking for and to make sure you find the right person. Yeah, yeah, because honestly, because I mean, we hired when Jerelle was still here, my late husband, we hired Angelie and it was so helpful. We didn't fight about money, but it allowed us to like like kind of get our goals out and say what do we need to do and have a professional guide.
Us along the path.
That was really helpful because it was like Drelle and I had talked about our goals, but it was kind of like how do we get there? I don't know. So Angelie helped to map out like kind of like this like year one, we're going to do this, Year two, you should do this, And it was really helpful. And you know, I personally where I look for a financial planner or anyone that's gonna teach me anything that'd be a good teacher.
Are they really patient?
Like? Literally, I tell Angelie, like, I know I'm the bunchets and ab girl, but I don't know nothing about all this. So I'm gonna ask you questions like I'm in fifth grade and so I have my notebook out and.
I'm like, so, explain what that word means.
So you want someone who's not condescending, who's really kind and easy to navigate.
Yeah, and so yeah, so that should be helpful.
You'll find your money match dot Com to find a financial planner, and your girls stop fighting with that need about money chat. I'll get somebody else to you know, in the mix.
In the mix good, right.
So if you like our show and we know that you do, we want you to leave a review or two A. If you're like a show and we know that you do, we want you to leave a review A two by. You know, I'm gonna forget that song next week, so don't expect me to remember it.
Many do we have any new reviews?
We do? I want to read your reading from Vicky seven four one two who loves to review just a couple of days ago. All right, she says, or he but she we know it's so she Get your life together and tune in is her review. This podcast has not only enhanced my life in the career and personal finance sector, but provided the space for my girl gang
to share knowledge and discussion. Thank you, Mandy and Tiffany your commitment to serving women of color, For your commitment to serving women of color in an authentic and vulnerable way.
Yes, girl gang, we love that, Bicky can't You could be like Vicki and get it shouted out too.
If you leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts, because it really helps to get our podcast out there and share the EPI, you know, especially be like, oh, this sounds like my sister needs this. Go ahead and press she girl, go keep it to yourself. Okay, So until next week, y'all.
Bye,