Hey, hey, hey, we're back. We're black, We're brown ambition. I wish I could really just see, like how the moves did I bring to the table, because I feel like it's not fully appreciated without my moves.
I'm envisioning them. I've seen them. You're a very good dancer. I actually when I picture you is wrapped up in a comforter in your bed telling Superman to stop walking in during our podcast recording.
I'm like every time, and I just can't believe our door creaks here too. I'm like, I thought we outgrew the creaking door. No other door in the house creaks. It's like they know that we do a podcast here. It's like just a little creek.
How are you, mandra I can't complain. I can't complain, long day at work, but I am so excited about this weekend. I think we both have fun weekends coming up here. You're turning feisty forty.
I'm not.
We're both missing epic milestones in one another's lives.
I know it makes me sad you're having the baby shower and.
The baby shower, but I'm also I feel like in our alternate universes from each other. It's it's fun that we're both having these really exciting major yeah, yeah, major weekends.
Major Yes. How many people are you expecting?
I don't know. My sister and my mom have actually done a pretty good job managing everything, so probably between like forty and fifty. But we're doing, Like did I tell you we're doing a party?
Party?
We're not doing because listen, I love all my friends. They're beautiful, they have had beautiful children. I love all their children. But I have been to so many boring baby showers I and I can't. I don't even like people watching me open Christmas gifts, like to sit there in the middle of a room at noon with like little sandwiches ammosas and open gifts in front of people and pretend like the fifteenth onesie is just cuter than the you know, the twentieth onesie. Like, I cannot do that.
So I told my mom because you know, my husban's family's Dominican, and I've been to a couple of Dominican baby showers. They are lit lit, so they start in the evening, they go all night, and I was like, let me embrace my Dominican side, my new Dominican family and let's just have a party. So we are having the party in Inwood in his family's backyard, not their literal backyard, their neighborhood, in the neighborhood at a restaurant. And it should be really fun, open bar. I think
there might be a DJ. I don't know. I've been snooping a little bit, but it should be really really fun, should be a party.
Yeah, that sounds awesome and to see and that's why, well, you know, we're having the party because it's my forties, so we're back to get down with the giddwn So yeah, it should be a good time. We're expecting about forty to fifty people as well, so I'm excited.
I mean, if you guys, you know, want the after party, come to Inwood hop over the river and just come onto the baby shower after party.
Yeah, it could be a right. I feel like no one's going to leave the house, you know.
No, those are my favorite, especially when it's your house and you don't have to leave, like even to go home. That's the best party.
No, So I you know, honestly, I don't mind the one in my house either because it means that like, yeah, when it's all said and done. I mean, yes, there's clean up, but there's no driving.
Yeah, if we could fit forty people in my house, I would one hundred percent be having the party there. One hundred percent no, But I'm all. I mean, like, when you get past your thirties and for did I just burp? Did you hear that it was the baby? I can't cantrol it. My organs are shifting anyway, when you get past this, like your thirties and forties, like these are like you need to celebrate these big moments,
you know, milestone birthdays and baby showers. Like any time I can have a party, I'm like, let's do it. Because everyone's got such busy schedules and I and it's harder and harder to get together with the people that I love, and I will have I will take any excuse to plan a big party. So I'm so looking forward to it. I see my mom like twice a year, so she's coming into town and it should be should be fun.
Tomorrow's my birthday, like my official birthday, so by the time this comes out, it'll be today, So I expect a lot of ads at the budget LISTA happy birthday. Yeah, I want I want you guys to burn through my battery. That's just my little request. I want me tag zing zing zing happy birthday, have a birthday like I love when they folks take like the litse little mini recordings and then they play it back and they're like listening
to Brown Ambition and they tag us. So just make sure you do like a happy birthday, tax so I can be like, look, how many people? First of all, Mandy, eighty people apply to be my admin. I don't even know that many of y'all listen eight now amazing.
That's not even including the people that I haven't sent you who have gone to Instagram to ask about the job. And I was like, didn't follow instructions, so.
Oh my goodness. I was like wow. Like my CEO was like, what did you say? I'm like, I don't know, So we shall see. We're still kind of like wading through.
Isn't it funny that you talked about that epic trip that you take your team on every year and you got all those applications. It's so crazy why anyone want to work for you when you're doing free trips to where'd you go? Arizona and Spas and shit, I want to work for you.
Honestly, that is kind of crazy. But you're right though, because I definitely there were people who are like saw the trip, would love to work for you. And I'm like, in what capacity exists? You have sent me nothing other than can you take me on a trip? Which is crazy, and I'm like, okay, what are your skills? But yeah, so I think we're finally winding down with the house.
We I think I brought my last pillow, you know how, Like you know, I tell myself all the time, like this is the second time I've had like a big move, and I told myself last time, Tippy, you don't need to get everything right now, and then you start to rush to get everything right now. And I guess because I'm having a party slash house for me, I want everything to be perfect. So we're just winding out. Thanks
shout out to Rihanna of remain Home. She's been amazing to help me, like get the design, the core sattles, and so there's just a few curtains to be hung up and we are ready to party.
I want to see it. I have been asking for months, even holding out on us.
Yeah, it's now like like the house is complete, I mean outside from like you know, some curtains and stuff like that. But I left Verizon today for the second time, and we're back with Optimum, so I can actually use my internet. Sorry rise in no shade, but shird. So I feel so happy in this house. It feels like a home, it feels pretty, it feels like just it feels good.
I'm happy for you. You rank Yeah, well, we would be remiss. I had needed to share. I need to share this headline because we talk a lot about emergency savings and people get so caught up on the rules of thumb, like I need to have six months saved. I just had a meeting with my financial planner last week, and the numbers she gave me for what I need to
have saved, I was like, booh, hanging up on you. No, but the number gets bigger once you have like a kid, or you have you know, like a house and that kind of stuff. But and I think when the numbers are so huge and you don't break it down or even like look at word, like, some people just get hung up on the big numbers. If they take their income, you know, for six months, and they're like I can never save you know, ten thousand, fifteen thousand, however much
it is. But this recent study came out, they actually surveyed like hundreds and hundreds of hundreds of family household incomes and determine that really, people who have two thousand, this is the exact number, two thousand, four hundred and sixty seven dollars stored away, the probability of experiencing financial hardship in the next six months is super low. And saving every dollar saved over that doesn't really seem to help reduce that probability very much. And I like this because,
you know, two thousand bucks. Yeah, it's a lot of money, but it's attainable. And it kind of illustrates the point we're always saying, like most people are are not They're not dumb, they're not financially you know, they're not getting into credit card debt because they're stupid or they're reckless.
They just don't have that cushion. And it starts with that five hundred dollars car repair, or it starts with that thousand dollars deductible at your health you know, you're the hospital that you weren't expecting and because you don't have that in the bank, you end up in that debt cycle and it just snowballs and snowballs. And so for me, twenty four hundred dollars, it's just kind of
it's a small, attainable, smallish attainable goal. And sure, it's nice if you can save you know, six months worths of income whatever that means for you, or even twelve months or whatever. But by making that goal a lot smaller, it just seems like, Okay, I can wrap my head around this, I can save this much money, and you can start somewhere.
No, that's fine. And then so who did that study? Again?
It was a federal what is it called, the Federal Reserve Bank of Saint Louis, in conjunction with this professor at some university that I cannot find right now, but I'll post a link. I read this story in market Watch today, Oh, University of Colorado and an economist at the Federal Reserve Bank of Saint Louis.
Okay, I like that because I'm like, you know, it's good to know because if that seems very daunting, like I've got to say, fifty thousand dollars or twenty thousand dollars, like I'm just never going to get there, so to say something like that seems just so much more reasonable. And you always think to yourself, like, you know, sometimes where these rules of thumb come from? First of all, where did the rule of thumb? What's the thumb? And the rule of thumb? Like why do we even say that?
You know, sometimes I feel like we're all just regurgitating the same thing because someone said it, and very few people stop and say, well, why is that really true?
So I like that picture with like a a Bereton in a coffee shop with the latte, like, what is the thumb? And why does it have the rule? Fair question? Fair question? Obviously, you know, the elephant in the room and kind of the cloud that's been hanging over I don't know. All the news this week has beene what happened to the woman in Fort Worth who was killed minding her business playing video games with her son in her house? Tatiana Jefferson, Oh, her nephew, her nephew. Sorry,
So she was killed by a police officer. And I honestly, when I read the first inotionial report, you know, you wait for more information, but there it was shocking to me how careless and senseless this death was. And it just to happen so closely to the man who was killed inside his own damn apartment by the cop who barged in thinking it was her apartment. So in this case, of course, immediately there were protests. But today it came out earth was it last night? I forget last night?
Or today it came out that the officer who shot this woman, a Tatiana was actually charged with murder.
Good which I heard that he was, that he was he Well, that's what it seems like he was. He resigned before he before being fired.
I mean, I don't know how you could live after. I mean, how could you live with yourself. You'd have to be a sociopath to have done something like that and to not feel just crushed. I mean, his life will be forever changed, as it should be.
But like, who just shoots through a window, Like, I just don't.
Really poorly trained police officer? I read that, Yeah, he was new, like he had just graduated a year before from the police academy.
You're just shooting through a window like literally it could have been a kid who's just standing up, or or it just could have been It could have been a ground like I don't.
Yeah, I just yeah, So what's the advice? Just if you're black in America and don't want to get shot, you.
Can't even stay home. It's crazy, like he can't even stay home. Honestly, here's my advice for folks. Stop calling the police off black people.
Well, I don't know who the neighbor who called the police. It sounded in one report it sounded like he was potentially like a homeless person. And I don't know what his race is or anything like that. I don't think any I haven't read an article that identifies him, but it seemed like, I mean, he didn't call nine one one. He just called like the general hotline saying, Hey, I
passed by this house. I noticed her. Maybe he like, I think he might have known her and her nephew and was concerned and thought he would call the cops for help. And I mean he must be devastated because without that phone call, she could very well still be alive.
Yeah, but this police officer honestly was likely going to because if you react this way, he was going to react this way.
Again, No, that's that's true, And who the hell is training these officers, Like that's really yes, of course this person holds responsibility, but who are we try, Like, who's training these people on how to do these types of how to answer these types of calls. I would like to believe that a neighbor looking out for my house and see something suspicious calling the cops, that it would end okay, that they would be a wellness check or a welfare check or whatever, and that cops would be
able to execute those properly. But clearly in Fort Worth they are not training their people properly, And I feel like this needs to go beyond just the officer getting fired, but like turn upside down the entire system that put him in that position in the first place. This news is always really hard, and I think because it came so closely after the death of that man, or the trial and the verdict of the policewoman who was sentenced to ten years for murdering the man in his apartment,
just so back to back. I mean, it's just I don't know, I read the news, I have my feelings about it, but as far as like what can we do now, that's the part I always kind of struggle with. But I do think talking about it. We're ready. So it's been a few days when we're ready to finally talk about it, you know, acknowledge that it happened, acknowledge their names. That's at least a step in the right direction.
Yeah, it is. It's just wow.
Well instead of instead of jumping into questions, you know, because I just kind of we ended buzzworthy on it on the somber note, why don't we have a bit of a pick me up? And I have a perfect way to pick us up real quick. So last week
on our show, we talked about our wildest dreams. I'm still sweaty thinking about my wildest dream and like it's it's, you know, putting yourself out there saying what you want to do with your life or your your wildest dream And we asked you guys to share with us your wildest dreams. And you know, if if you had no limitations, what would you do? And we got dozens of messages on Instagram, We got a couple of emails, and I thought I could go through real quick and share some of them.
Ooh, I love that. Yeah, let's do that.
That's okay with you? Okay, So here we go. First, one comes from Instagram fan Air Vegan. She says, my dream is to no longer work in sales, but work for myself and grow a business that gets me out of debt and helps grow other businesses.
Love that, Yes, that is awesome.
Next one comes from at Neela Mack. Her dream is to retire in ten years and she looks pretty young. So listen, if you get there, write a book and I'll buy it.
Yeah, that's awesome. Okay, okay, keep in comment, and.
Mela Max says, by the way, Mandy, you're awesome. I can't wait to see your play. Oh, sweaty, sweaty okay. Next one comes from Instagram user butters one fifty eight. My hashtag my wildest dream. I would love to own my own professional soccer team in Europe and make them a worldwide brand.
That's awesome.
That is making my dream look like nothing.
No, and also I love how specific you are, which is always really good.
Let's see on Instagram too. Christy Dno says, listening to the podcast this morning, and I can one hundred percent see Mandy writing a play. You know how much you love Broadway. Please use your maternity leave to get it going. Okay, that's a lot of pressure.
It is because you know this is going to be a baby involved during maternity lead.
But like they sleep sometimes, right, I could write a play.
Well, you never know, honestly. I've heard some moms say, oh my gosh, girl twenty four hours, and some moms say there's a lot of downtime. So you just never know how it's going to go.
We'll see, we'll see. All right, Let's take one from email. So this is from a listener named Joy who emailed us and says she's twenty three, a single mom of a five year old girl who has severe cerebral palsy
and epilepsy. Her daughter's nonverbal, wheelchair bound, has a feeding tube, and she honestly had to step up and learned at twenty three years old how to take care of a daughter with special needs, didn't find any really good resources, got a ton of misinformation, and says that her biggest, craziest, wildest dream is to be a life coach or even start a boot camp for parents who have no idea what they're doing but have no other choice but to learn.
Ah, honestly would be amazing, especially if you honed in on parents new parents with special needs children. I don't think you really like I literally have never heard of like some sort of you know, like resource or tool. I just think that parents, you know, parents who just find out their kids are on the spectrum for autism, parents whose children you know, might have down syndrome, parents who I think that parenting to a special needs child takes another layer of love that I think most people
can never even imagine. And I think if you started it could be just starting as simple as a Facebook group and started from there, you'd be surprised. I say, go for it.
Yeah, a thousand percent. I mean one of the one of the commonalities with successful businesses is that you have a problem yourself that is a pain point for you, and you help solve that pain point for other people. But honestly, even if you just give advice to one person who's gone through what you went through, that is just a huge contribution and of itself. So that's beautiful. Thank you, Joy, Thank you guys for sharing your wildest dreams.
Send me more messages. We can read some on you know, I won't read them all, but we can on Today Show anyway, but we can read them next week and the week after that, hit us up at Brand Ambition Podcast on Instagram, email us at Brand Ambition Podcast at gmail dot com, or you can tweet us at the BA podcast on Twitter.
Now it's time for questions.
Let's do it. Hmm, so many good questions week. Honestly, you guys were on fire. I loves it. We're gonna save some. But let's take a question from the gram Let's see. Oh, this one's good. Okay, let's leave her anonymous. She says, Hey, Mandy and Tiffany, I'm searching for a new job and many of the posts ask about my salary expectation. I want to make more than I make in my current position. So should I ask for ten
percent more across the board? Or is there a website I should use to determine the salary range for each position that I'm applying for. Thank you, and I love the show.
Feel like this is your thing? Mandy. What do you say?
Yeah, so I think the idea. So it sounds like she's gonna be searching for jobs that are not all the same. So I do think it's smart for you to check out some sites like payscale dot com or glassdoor dot com and be location specific to whatever city you're applying for, because city does matter, and kind of get a sense of what salary ranges are. If you're working in a field right now that's not similar to what you're applying for, it's more difficult for you to judge.
You know, you can't just slap ten percent on your current pay and say, Okay, I'm gonna be made a reasonable salary. You know what if the job that you're going into has a whole different salary range for the area that you're in. So it sounds like research is definitely good. Would I would not advise anyone to put their expected salary on an application.
Skip it.
They they should not make it mandatory. I don't think any application can make it mandatory to answer that question. Skip it, because you know what happens. You know, I've hired a lot of people. When you put that number down, it gives us a starting place, and we may have a big budget, and if you're at the bottom end of that budget, we'll start negotiating from there. Like if you say, I'm I expect sixty five and the role you know is seventy five to eighty five range, we
might just say okay, sixty eight. You're excited, Yay, sixty eight. I got more than I asked for. But it's good for us because it's underneath our budget, under our budget, but bad for you. So I would I would put the ball as much as you can in the hiring
manager or the hr REPS court, dance around it. If you can't skirt the issue, try and make them give you a number for what they think the expectation is for the salary for that role, what they think the role is worth, and see what they come back with. But don't give them the benefit of firing. I can't think of the right analogy. I don't know, shooting the first hoop, I'm bad at this today, whatever, making the first move. As far as naming a number.
Yeah, no, I think that that's good advice on this because you just never know. I think even what i'm negotiating with, like people who want a sponsor or whatever something that I'm doing, I try to put the ball on their court to see like kind of like what number they give, and then then I push up from there because you'd be surprised. There's been times when I'm like, wait, what how much? I was gonna say half.
That, but okay, you know so, no exactly.
Yeah, that's good advice.
And I've seen too many people take the first offer too quickly, too quickly. I mean good again, good for us. I'm like playing two roles here. I love as a high are your manager. You want it to be an easy negotiation because it makes things move faster. There's less paperwork, there's less back and forth, you don't have to get
special approvals. But at the same time, I will never not negotiate myself, knowing what I know now being on this side of things, and I wish I could reach across the table to people, although I want in my position, I wouldn't do that if I were the one hiring and just say, please ask for more, just ask.
For more, just do it.
Make me work for it, make me work for it, you know.
So.
But excellent question, and good luck with the job search.
Yeah, so it's a good times the job search too. Because I didn't you say it's a good market. I'm not sure, like, because I know I'm hiring and we're always hired for something I feel like, But I feel like, is how is it out there in the general market, in the real world.
What are you trying to say with the with the commonas no, well, definitely, I mean, unemployment is still at record lows. But what's happening is you know, you know all that talk a couple of months ago was it of like the next recession. It feels like every two months as someone's like, this is it, guys, the recession's coming.
Well.
The reason that talk of one of the biggest reasons we were starting to have that fear crop up this past summer was because in a lot of public company reports, you know, they have to come out every quarter and say here's how we're doing, here's where we spent our money, here's how much debt we have, et cetera. The message that we were getting from a lot of big companies was they were pulling back their investment in labor, which
means they're pulling back new hires. You know, they see that they've been on like something of a hiring spree for the past year whatever, the past few years, and they're like, Okay, we're going to scale things back, and now is a signal that the labor market could be softening, that there aren't that many there won't be that there won't be that much investment in people in the future,
and that kind of cost them of the worry. That being said, though, there's still tons of jobs out there, Like there's some industries that are begging for people to apply because they can't find and I know, as it's anytime someone quits on my team, I'm just like, oh god, here it goes a two month process.
You know.
It's it's hard because a lot of people have jobs and it takes more time and longer to find them and poach them. Yep, but it does happen shockingly when they are unemployed and they're just you know, out there
waiting for you to pluck them up. So yeah, I still think it's a good market if you're employed, but just keep that in mind, Like companies are beginning to be a little bit more conservative, so you may not be getting you may not have quite as much leverage as you did, you know, even six months ago, a year ago when it comes to negotiating, if those companies are tightening up their purse strengths when it comes to the cost of labor.
But it's always good to like, I mean, you're out there getting looking for a job, Mandy's giving you good advice. Try to walk in confidence. Be really clear to me. You should be clear about what your strengths are, because that's what I look for, Like, you know, like what
do you feel your strengths are. I mean, we're all NERVERU storing an interview, but I'm looking to see if you know what your strengths are and like you're clear about what you can bring to the table, because yes, I know that there's something that I'm wanting, but I'm always looking for someone who's like, yes, I can do the one thing that you're hiring for, but do you know I also dot dot di And I'm like, really, I would honestly say most people that I've hired, they've
come with this extra set of skills and I'm like, oh, that's awesome, And in my mind, I'm thinking, you know, we could tap into that later, although I need you for this one thing.
No, exactly one hundred percent agree.
Okay, more question.
All right, let's take another career question. Also, this person hit hates on Atlanta, so we need to we need to have beef, all right. So Instagram user says, call me Nakia from Black Panther. Okay, got it, Nakia, I am seeking some career Advice. I'm twenty five years old and I live in Charlotte, North Carolina. Previously, I was
a mortgage loan officer making almost six figures. However, I wanted to get out of mortgage sales, so I transition into commercial lending and now have an analytical role where I'm actually making less. The money isn't the issue though. With the new job, I had to relocate to atl which was originally supposed to be temporary, but now it's looking like it may be permanent. I really enjoy my job, but the thing is I hate Atlanta. Sorry, Mandy, It's okay.
I mean Charlotte ain't that great, but whatever. My company is going through a merger and will now be offering a pension. If you were me, would you stick it out to get the pension in the city you hate, or would you accept an offer to go back into mortgage sales just to get back to Charlotte. For more context, I own a home in Charlotte. Plus my longtime boyfriend of three years is still in Charlotte. Uh, I feel
like go to Charlotte. I'm going to say that, like, I mean, a pension's nice, but it has you need to like work there for a long time to qualify for it. Probably, you know, they could, I don't know. It just seems like you have so much of a life in Charlotte.
Yeah, and also too, I mean this is I mean it's not common, but I definitely have heard of like cases where you know, a company has run out of money, so their pension has bank was bankrupt so they weren't able to pay out anymore. I would hate for you to wrap your whole life in choices around this pension
when there's nothing that's guaranteed. And I just think you should just go for the life that you want now, not necessarily like hopefully somehow maybe especially since you can just kind of create your own pension by having a retirement account that you put money into. Yeah.
Absolutely, And you know, a pension it almost for it's so old school. I'm surprised or even adding a pension now, it's very surprising to me. But it also I think it creates a sense of, oh, I'm loyal to the company, I'm gonna stay here because I have this pension, and you're kind of and TIFFs right, you can create your own pension easily by investing your own and you're on You're only twenty five, so.
Oh yeah, girl, you do not want that pension by the time, it's usually like twenty five years, So you're gonna stay in Atlanta for twenty five years. So you could be like, I've got a pench No boom right, you got should boo your house, your life. You don't like Atlanta. So you're super young. I don't want you to like make choices, especially when you're really young. You know, now is the time to make choices that are really in alignment with how you want to live your life.
As you get a little bit older and you have other responsibilities you have to take into account kids and maybe you know your your significant other as far as like marriage concerned and some other things. But when you're super young, you really have more flexibility to just be like, I just want to do it because that's what I feel like, like, take advantage of that, lean into that.
And I would just congratulate you on doing what you should do in your twenties, which is making a career pivot because you have such like you don't have strings attached right now, you don't have a family that you're dragging around with you you have the opportunity to shift and pivot, try something different because you realize, oh, this first job that I have I'm not happy with. So you're really brave to take this new opportunity and try
something different. And what if you learned you love your new job, you just don't love where you are. So let's pivot to a different location and see if you can get a job in Charlotte. I know you probably can. Like Charlotte's popping right now, there's the banking industry is huge in Charlotte. Actually, my company is based in Charlotte. There's so many financial institutions, Bank of America, allies in Charlotte. I mean, and they all got you know, I got
my mortgage through Ally. I know they offer mortgages. So maybe there is a job waiting for you in Charlotte that now that you know what you love doing, you can get everything you know, or at least a few things that you want. Get your booth, an, get your house, and get the job that you're really happy with in the place where your happiest.
Yeah, go back to Charlotte.
Go back to Charlotte.
So those are great questions. Honestly, I love when you guys ask us questions about career, about your home, about finances. Honestly, me and Mandy love answering all of them, so keep them coming. And now it's time boys and girls, well mostly girls, for that part of our segment where it's time to boost to break. Maybe are you going to boost or are you going to break?
There were so many personalities you just shifted through it. I did.
I was trying to decide if I was gonna break out the song.
And then I was like, you know what, No, I'm not gonna You went with like game show hosts, Okay, I want to do a boost. I want to do a boost real quick. Well a boost and a break again.
I just am so conflicted. So the boost is I discovered through my insurance plan because I was poking around the website for my insurance and looking really hard for like benefits for prenatal care or new parent care or anything like that, and I found out I could get a free two hundred dollars breast pump with a huge supply of bags, which I have heard from moms are very important. It's very important to have the bags. I don't know what they're for. I'm assuming to catch the
receptacle for the milk. But whatever, I'm learning, I just save two hundred dollars by getting this from through my insurance. And that's true, right, And I literally just call the number. It was through CBS care Mark. I was like, hello, I heard I could get a free breast pump. They were like, yes, you can, ma'am right, and they shipped it to me in less than a week. And I I'm like, do more people like if you are a new parent or I don't know, if you just look
at your insurance and see what freebies you have. I found out I can, I could. I could have gotten reimbursed for some of the prenatal yoga classes that I've done. So I'm trying to get that, uh, get that, get those wheels into motion. And then I found out that I can. I was about to sign up for a breastfeeding and lactation class. I can get I can get that reimbursed if I if I use the right kind
of consultant or whatever. Just like they don't send you a packet in the mail when you become pregnant with all this information. You have to really go digging for it. So the boost is for the freebies. The break is for they don't make it easy for you to find them. But as someone who has been paying for insurance for I don't know, over a decade now on my own and never like I never really use insurance, I don't really just stick that off and knock on wood. You know,
I don't go to the doctor that much. I just pay because it's smart to have it. And I'm like, Okay, finally I have reason to take advantage of full advantage of my benefits. And I'm just finding out that they don't always make it super easy for you to find that. But I encourage all of you guys to read that fine print and see what kind of.
Freebies you could have super smart. I knew about the breast pumpt is because my sister, I think, got one because she found out. Yeah, she found out through a friend of hers, and I was like, oh, that's really good. But you're right. There are a ton of resources that you can get if you would only know and lean in. Honestly, it's one of the things. I'm my best friend Linda.
She is a social worker, and when I tell you, so many people reach out to her because you know, maybe they've been told one thing or another, like she's had so many people get the resources that they're entitled through their insurance, I mean everything from I knew a woman who had steps, but she had she's had really bad diabetes, so she was in a wheelchair and literally her neighbors every time she wanted to leave the house, her neighbors, who were young guys, would have to carry
her down the steps for her to get to where she's going. She Linda was like, no, you get a ramp, got her a ramp, got her home, aid to take her food shopping, and got like some other resources that she was like, no, it comes along with your insurance, and so you just would be surprised. I wish And I told Helyn that one of the things I want to do is to like do some lives with her so she can share some of the things that you might qualify for that you don't even know because people
don't know to ask. And because she's, like I said, a social worker and she's worked in that environment for so long, she knows how to advocate on folks behind. But sometimes it's just it's just asking like hey, is there like is there a resource available? Oh? Sure, Like like, there's a resource my nephew. My sister uses a program for parents and it greatly reduced how much her how much she paid for your childcare, like significantly, almost in half,
And I didn't know. I was like, oh, wow, that's awesome. So there's just honestly, there's just so many awesome resources out there that you have available to you that you might not know. So typically, I just hit up Linda. I told her she needs to start a company and I already named it the on call Advocate. But Linda is so like, no, No'm I just helping. I'm like, Linda, start a company. People can call you and you can help walk them through the resources that they have available
to them. People would pay for that.
Find your Linda, people, find your Linda in your task in your town or city or state where you have state specific benefits. I found out stuff about New York City New York state disability benefits like might be more generous than I thought as far as covering my parental leave. And I was like, I'm figuring all that out. They
don't make it easy. I'm in Like I had to tell the person I talked from the phone about my I was trying to sign up for my short term disability benefits, you know, for when I'm on leave, and I got super confused, but she was like, we're gonna figure. I'm gonna I have another call with her. I have a call with my HR department to fix because I'm gonna get every penny I possibly possibly can. And I'll tell you, guys, how I make that happen.
Good.
We all need a Linda, Yeah, we do.
We do in so many ways. This is a good person in general.
I just have Google.
Yah, So I am actually gotta do a little bit about Booz. I'm trying to see if I can find the post. So I don't know if you saw this post circulating love. He actually had it in her in her stories, but it's like circulating everywhere. Okay, here it is. Snoop Dogg posted a picture of Gucci Man, who is a famous rapper if you're not aware, in his wife, who he married a year or so ago, a couple of years ago.
So anyway, he posted a picture of them, I guess at their wedding, and he wrote, he wrote, everyone wants this, but what y'all forget is she was with Wild Gucci on drugs, Gucci cheating, Gucci in jail, Gucci publicly with other women, Gucci. This is Gucci after therapy, rehabilitation, this is This is a street man, groomed in his thirties after he's been at his lowest point. The point is, she's a writer who knew what she signed up for.
Some of you women is with the next dude after a couple of fights, and I'm like, who wants drug Gucci cheating Gucci, jail, Gucci publicly with Gucci.
If I were this woman, I'd be like, uh, thank.
You, because you know what, it's so crazy how women it's like that that theory that women should ride or die? Why I got to die? Like why is that even on the table? That I just want that people stop telling women that they should and not just women, but I guess meant too that somehow you should put up with all of this toxic energy and the hopes that this person turns around, because that makes you a writer. So what if Gucci never got into jail? What if
Gucci died from drugs? What if? So, then what would have life have been? Yes, he turned it around, but honestly, the likely it wasn't in his favor. Let's be real, like to me, she put up with too much. That's too much. Like I just don't understand, and I don't understand how a man with daughters, because Snoop Dogg I believe has at least one daughter could share that. Is that what you want for your daughter to be with someone who is cheating, drug addicted goes to jail because
of poor choice? Is that what you're wanting for your daughter? Are you going to tell her? Hey, stick it out? The Snoop Dogg right like writes underneath it that something to the effect that, like, you know, I basically put my wife through something similar. She's my secret weapon because I remember, like I remember seeing how that that swoop dog like you know, he is like a whole separate house where he can keep his concubines, and that he cheats on his wife left and right. But what is
what is that? I just don't understand. Yeah, so that is my brown break. Sometime women to settle for the worst of the worst of the worst in hopes that maybe one day this man turns it around. Because guess what, there are men out there who don't cheat, who don't mistreat their wives, who don't who are not on drugs, who are who are not making choices that would place them in jail, who are not making choices that would place their wife or their significant other in harm's way.
You don't have to that's you don't have to settle for that, Like why because Gucci man has money? What
does that even mean? So? Yeah, it's just I'm so tired of that, of that that somehow, because especially geared toward women of color, especially black women, that narrative and as if somehow we don't support our men enough, if we don't put up with and it's one thing like you know, I believe it, you know, working it out with your significant other through like oh you maybe therapy, this is that, but not when it's like dangerous toxic behavior.
Since right, I will say, I mean, and how many of us are the friends of people that you've seen? Do you know, stay with people who treat them badly or you know, stay with people who are not ultimately good for them or contributing to their life. And it's really hard to be that friend, right, It's really hard to be that sister or that cousin because you're always in that awkward position.
Yes, And sometimes you just want to be like because you want to say like it's not good for you or this is not healthy, and it's hard when someone's like, you know, vacillating or they're just like, no, this is where I want to be. I just I just want that that's not what we teach our young women, our older women, our girls. I just want that, you know that you don't there really is. To me, there's a narrative out there that men are bad and then you just have to choose the lesser of the evils when
it comes to men. And I'm like, that's just not true. I know so many good men, you know. Yeah, Like I know so many good men, and I wish that that wasn't that wasn't the story that people put out there that Oh I was watching something like like you see, I'm so totally into like random pop culture. Recently, I was watching some interview with Kate Michelle and basically that's what she said, like, you know, men are bad. Men
are bad people. They cheat. You just gotta find one that doesn't cheat as much or that's not as obvious. And I'm like, that's not true. That's just not true. Yeah, yeah, it is, said I do. I honestly, I'm sad for people who feel that way, because you know, somebody might be like, well, girl, you wouldn't know Superman might cheat, and I'm like, and he'll be by himself. He knows very quickly. Girl, I could do bad, but my bad.
That my damn self. But honestly, I don't. I don't, Like, you know, I'm not someone who checks through phones or anything like that. But like you know, I think women have intuition. I don't. That is not that is not the experience I've experienced. I've seen Superman has a twin brother. When I tell you he's been with the same woman since he was fifteen and been so overhead and heels in love, I mean that's all I mean. Like even here at the house, I'm like, are you hungry? His
nickname is Nobby, Superman's twin, identical twin, You're hungry? No, my girl made food like you won't even eat no place else, Like just such a good dude and like so in love with her still to this day. They're nearly forty. So I just it just goes to show that, like that's just not true. That don't let that be your narrative. You don't have to settle for less. There
are men who are good out there. There's a lot of men working out there, just like there's a lot of women who are good out there, and that they don't have to settle for that. And you can draw a line in the sand and say no, I'm worthy of more. So. Yeah, So don't you know, I'm glad the Gucci man is in a good place. I might here to hate on Gucci, but child cheese, I am not riding and dying. Ride or die. I mean, we'll ride as long as there's no danger involved.
But you can let me out of this stop if we're approaching Cheatingville for drugs City.
Yeah.
But for all the women who are in those relationships, you know, I've known you, I've known people like you. I know how hard it is to get out. So I don't know, I respect for It's just so difficult because you can't judge people who are in those relationships.
I'm all shut up after this, but it's hard to judge them because they're so in it, and it's hard to convince them that's not right for them, and you just hope that they come out on the other side and they see the light and find something that is worthy of your time. So that was it a good break. I mean, maybe you don't go to Snoop Dogg to raise your to to you know, share lessons for your daughter future daughters out there, but it.
Was all over the social and I just I just got that. I love the stories, and I thought, how many young men and young women are going to look at this and say, yes, yes, agreed? You know?
And who's ky Michelle?
She just wanted like the Housewives. She's a signer too, but she's one of like is it the Housewives? No? No Love and hip hop?
Oh see now I don't have cable and I don't know whatever. Yeah, ky Michelle got it, got it. Got ITT's the way I can't listen to the read because the first thirty minutes of their show, I just am like, what.
That's I'm not gonna I love to read. That's one of my favorite shout out to read forgetting your own show. And yes, that's amazing. I see. I used to watch Kid Theory on on YouTube when he was in front of that salmon colored wall and he was hilarious then. So to see how far they've come honestly like, yeah, they are inspo for real, for real.
I love it except for what I have no idea what they're talking about. But you're right, I ain't to get with it.
That's why I get my stuff. I'm like, oh, what's happening in the world of ratchetness? Okay, thank you. Between and a little bit of Instagram here and there with something pops up with my tima, I'm like, oh, okay, dually noted.
I think our shows are the perfect, like you know, side by side, dual pack. You get your you know, you don't get your ratchetness from us, I mean not for me like for serve like please, but you know you get your financial advice and you've listened to the read like that's a good combo platter.
It is, it is. It's been an awesome show, as pretty used in sidebar shout out to Michelle from Home Depot and I don't even know what was that like, because she ran up to me and was like, I love your podcast. Tell Mandy. I said, Hi, I'm not gonna hug you, but I was like, go ahead, girls, just go ahead on. So she did, and so I'm just like, it's so I just love that I'm out in about and how you guys are shouting out the podcast. So I meant to just shout out Michelle from home
depot and in like Westfield or Summit. I don't know where that was, but yeah, just I was like, oh, that was nice, and she was just super excited. But I thought it was cute because as soon as she said I'm not gonna hug you, I mean, I'm like, you're listened to the podcast. She's like, I do it. But I took the hug anyway, and she was really nice.
Her husu Well, Happy fortieth birthday, everybody tweet Graham, text if you got her number Facebook, if you don't say happy birthday to Tip tomorrow, Happy fortieth, feisty forty. It's gonna be the year.
Yeah, this is gonna be the year.
I don't know how the hell you're gonna top the last decade, but good luck. And you set the bar very high.
So I'm okay with's slowing down. If I don't do nothing else, I feel like I'm good for life.
That's a beautiful place to be at forty. Let me just say that's my goal for forty. I'm gonna be okay with where I'm at? Yes, yes, all right, Well, enjoy and I will text you some baby shower pictures if you text me some party pictures, and I will be celebrating. I'll be celebrating you and my heart and my mind this weekend talk as well.