Hey, hey, Hey, it's up.
I sound way more cheerful than I feel. I feel so run down.
It's that mid January, holidays are over. What's the lead to look forward to in life? Still getting dark at four pm and it's negative million degrees type of vibe? Is that what I'm feeling?
Yes?
Plus taxis it's coming. I paid taxes today and I was like, wait what. I had a big scare, but then turned I didn't know as much as I thought, but still it's like I can't even shake that big scare. It's almost like, you know, you think there's like a monster in your closet and your parents turns on the light. It's like there's no monster, but you're still looking at the clost like there was a monster. I just feel like, ah, I feel you.
I know, it's just uh.
And then I started my IVS, so I feel like I'm on an emotional roller coaster.
But it took me a while to realize. I'm like, why am I so wild?
Because you're being pumped full of hormones?
Right? Yes, it took me a minute to realize until until Superman was like, what is your deal?
I'm like nothing, nothing, And then I was like, wait, isn't the shots? And I was reading he was like, I'm pretty sure it's the shots. So yeah, so I was first of all, I was scared to death because I'm not scared of needles, like but I mean, no one says, yeah, a needle, right.
I mean you know, unless you know, I don't know, unless.
You're I did when I got milkshakes afterward, but no one gives me those anymore.
But like, so the way it works is that they have me on like these two types of medicine, so I have to take you have to be a chemist.
I'm like, oh my god.
I was so nervous about the first one. I actually drove to the doctor's office early morning to just do it in front of them, because you have to like mix the sailing mixture with just four vials of powder, like mix it yourself, wait really yes, and then pull it out like I mean you literally are like a chemist. And then after all of that, then you have to poke yourself. And so it was I'm not gonna lie.
Every morning I get a little bit of anxiety about doing the mixture right and then and then at night it's really easy, like the I guess whatever the medicine is like almost like in a pen pen form, so literally just kind of like put the pen against your stomach and push your medicine in the needles self actually doesn't really hurt. I would say on the scale of one to ten, it's a two. But just the fact of like you know, sticking a needle in your belly, it's like, yay, not fun.
Times kind of goes against that base human instincts not to impale oneself.
So yeah, but but yeah, so we'll see. So I guess from what I understand, which I probably should know more, but honestly, I just I'm tired that I think what this medicine is doing is actually lowering my hormones on purpose. So basically this medicine is pulling the rubber band back. And then I'm gonna take a slingshot medicine like you know, like I don't.
Know, like I don't know a week where it's actually.
Gonna like pop me forward, like you know, you let go of the yeah and then all of a sudden like because normally, as a woman, you know, you produce one egg a month, so the pop forward is to say.
Ovulate and then hopefully you produce a ton of eggs.
You know, I don't know anywhere from I don't know more than one to like ten fifteen.
I don't know how many women can produce.
So then from those eggs, so you know, at least for me, they'll you know, they'll teak the eggs out, you know, combine it with Superman his sperm, and then like hopefully embryos grow, and then they'll choose you know, up to two healthy embryos, because you still have the there's still a chance that one of them is not gonna make it, and they'll put two inside. Well, she's gonna put two, and then it may be twins, it may not.
You're gonna go for two, Okay.
Well she said, well not because she was like, honestly, I'm not trying to for it's not for you to have twins. It's just that there's a there's always a high likelihood of one not making it. So it's really so you can be guaranteed, like, you know, not guaranteed, but you have a you know, a higher chance of one making it.
But I don't hope it for twins, even though I'm kind of.
Not Oh my god, yeah, we're gonna have to cancel the show. If you have twins, I know you're gonna do that.
I'm gonna have to take like a month because not even a month month.
Okay, we'll cross that bridge it comes to.
And then from there so I don't know, I mean so what So typically what happens is so you go through the cycle of like shot shot shots, fulling shot, pull the eggs, you know, mix it with with with your partner's sperm, grow, grow, grow embryos, put one inside, hope it grows.
If it doesn't, then you start all over. Shot shot shot. So some people are like on their fifth or six, seventh, tenth cycle, you know.
That's what they consider like a round of ibs. It's from the hormones to the insemination and then like the incubating of the embryos.
Yeah for the most part, and so and then if it you know, if it doesn't, then you.
Go for another round. So that's a full round.
So this is my very So those of you who have been following my journey, you're like, you're just now getting to it. Yes, I had fibroids, and then I had so many that they removed them. It's called scar tissue and I had to have two surgeries to move that, and it was just all of this this full year
and some change. But I think I had my fibward search I want to say, like January, which like actually right like right about now, January twenty fifth, I think, And and now it's January twenty second, so literally almost a year to date.
So it took a.
Year of like preparing my uterus for to be able to carry babies. So that's why I'm just now getting because most people don't have to go through all this, like if they're getting IBF, they might not have a fiber issue, so they just kind of go and start the process.
But it's been a long time of preparation for me.
Man weill fingers no, and.
Who would have thought.
Meanwhile, you know, and when you're young, you're like, oh, please don't be PREGGI good, Please do't get pressure plae to get pregnant. Meanwhile, now it's like you bending over backwards doing hulu oups, you know.
To get pregnant. It's so strange how life happens, because you.
Know, you could be fifteen and you're like, no, I just looked at a penis and now I'm pregnant and as a thirty nine year old woman, I'm like, please come on, overes. So yeah, I mean, like I said, it's I didn't realize it's not until you start talking about IVA that you find out just how many women.
My doctor told me that that it.
Concerns the fertility industry that how how our fertility men and women has significantly dropped over the years, that it's much, yeah, much lower. Like there's a trend of it just going down, down, down, And I'm like, wow, why do you think that is?
She was like, I don't know.
Honestly, they don't know is it's stress, is a diet. They don't know why less and less women are fertile and less and less men honestly are fertile.
Because that's interesting, Like that's the first time I've heard fertility being down, because you hear like birth spain down, which I think is a symptom of just people getting married older and not wanting kids, in the economy and all kinds of stuff. But fertility, Wait, are we are we actually gonna be end up in the Handmaid's tail?
No?
Right, She was like, honestly, that you know that there's an overall fertility issue happening. And I don't know if she met in the United States or like worldwide, but yeah, so she was like, you know, more and more folks that you wouldn't expect to have, you know, a fertility issue are She's like, like, you two, like, I don't drink. I've never had. I don't smoke, I never have. You know, I exercised fairly, you know, I mean, well, let me
not lie. I don't but I don't drink it, I don't smoke, okay, but but yeah, so you know, I don't know.
I just feel I'm not gonna lie.
I am scared because I'm feeling overwhelmed by business right now, and I'm like, oh, how does the baby fitness all this?
Well I'm doing when you've got two of them in your arms, you just make room. You'll you'll do it. You're not the first working mom. You can do it. You can do it. You'll find a way. Yeah, you'll find me.
Williams can win a Grand Slam and have a baby.
Well, I mean, that's just don't compare yourself to her, because she seriously she's got Beyonce's nanny on speed dial. That's different.
Sure, but you.
Really, You've made me think about my own fertility. I need to you guys know, I need to see some doctors in my life. But I'm really it's not like it's an immediate plan, but I'm definitely i'd rather know now so I can because you know, I'm thirty one right now, and I feel like I'm at a point where I should at least see what's happening under the hood a little bit more than I have. It's been Yeah, it's been over a year since I went back to
the gynecologist. So that's not healthy. I'm going to do better.
It's good.
Like, you know, you don't want to find out you have fibroids from randomly like wait what and so or not you. But I'm just saying in general, like I never I never thought about checking my fertility, you know, like you just you know, as a woman, you just assume, like, well, of course I could have a baby, it's just whether
or not do I want to or not. But I never thought because I'm like, I'm one of five girls, you know, Like I was like, uh, I come from a fertile family, like my grandma had like you know, eight children or whatever, and so but that's not you know, one she didn't have them as late as I'm having my first, you know, so it sometimes there's a fertility issue that only that only comes up if you wait.
So like my my younger sister, she had two kids boom boom, you know, back to but like like she got married and literally within a year had her first and then a year later had her second. But she also had them in her like in her early thirties. So maybe if I would have, you know, had my first kid at thirty, it wouldn't I wouldn't have had an issue.
So but yeah, so it's just good to.
Know where you stay and like going if you're thinking that you might want to have kids in the future.
Because honestly, my doctor was like.
Uh, Tiffany, you know, like you like, she was like, you should have been here yesterday. I was like, oh, thanks, because apparently I guess what is it called?
Is it called follicles?
That's a word, but how are you using it?
I know, I'm like, there are I think, don't quote me. So anyway, like inside, like I guess attached to your you TuS, I want to say.
I'm probably wrong, but.
Right, So women have a number of follicles, So I think you can have like I don't know how many you can have on each side, you know, but each of those fonnicles produces an egg. But some women have like ten, you know. And so for me, I'm down to four. If you don't have any follicles, you cannot produce any egg, then you are truly you're truly not fertile.
No more eggs.
And so when I was like wow, when she said I was down the four, I didn't know if I was like, okay, so four compared to what And she was like, you know, I would have to go to see like the most women have. But she said, for example, women can have ten, and I was like okay. And for my age, although I'm thirty nine. At thirty nine, I guess a typical thirty nine year old would have more than four. So I don't know why it could
be hereditary. It could be, but see, like I wish if I would have known, I mean, I don't know that I would have been like, hey, Superman, let's get this baby pop in.
I don't know what I would have sided.
But let's just say I waited another two years, you know, and I lost two more follicles. You know, I don't know if I was born with a lot a little because I've never checked my follicles or whatever before. So when she said that, I was like wow. So basically, for me, time is of the essence. You know, men can have like kids until they're like, you know, one hundred and one.
But how do you mean?
Oh, sorry to interrupt, but I was going to ask how do you? And I wonder if other women listening have the same fear. But I've had friends, you've had miscarriages, and I almost feel like preparing to have a kid is also like mentally preparing for what can go wrong. I mean, I'm a natural pessimist and it's not always a good thing, but I wonder if that's crossed your mind, and if you have like a plan for how you might handle it, or if your doctor has talked about that possibility at all.
Well.
I haven't mentioned this before, but actually I had a miscarriage a year ago. That's how I found out that I had five words, and so it was like it was only I was only like two months in two and a half, so I knew I was having like crazy pains. It was like Superman and I had just gotten married. Not even it wasn't a year ago, it was you know, no, no, it was because I had the five words surgery not that long after, but I found out I was pregnant.
I was like, what, Okay, it's good.
But then like soon after, like you know, only like like a month or two in, I just was having like really terrible stomach pains and it was like, I don't know, I felt like I was getting kicked in the stomach, and so I went to the emergency room and.
And she was like, uh, are you shying? You're pregnant.
I'm like, well, I took like a number of test I had so many five boards they couldn't even see.
And I didn't even know that I had five words.
And I was like what And I lost the baby and I was I mean, it was like a mix between like I don't want to I felt like I felt it more after than during, because I was more shocked, like I have five woids, you know, and so but he.
Oh, I'm sorry, that's my IVF shot reminder.
Okay, I'm keeping that in you.
So, so what I what I learned was like I had so many five woords so here's the thing that even it was better for me to have had that mischaracter, like you know, I was like, like I said, a little under three months because my all the five boids combined were like the size of me being like four months pregnant, meaning that that those fibers are taking so much space the baby would not have been able to grow past six months, like as far as size, you know,
So imagine having a miscaracter at six months, you know.
So that's what I found out, and so of course I right away it was like, well I want to get rid of them.
I mean, there's all these natural remedies and things that you can you could try, but I was like I didn't want to wait like two years for something to work, and so you know, I decided to have the five word surgery. It actually went really really well. I had a really good doctor. My recovery was I mean, I thought everyone's five word surgery was kind of like that. And so a number of my friends had it after me, and they didn't have as their.
Recovery was much harder. For My recovery was really.
Like after a couple of days, I felt like almost myself again. I had to remind myself you have stitches like sit, you know, settle down. So the surgery was fine, but then I kept getting the scar tissue because I had so many fibers removed. And so finally I think I mentioned like in a previous episode they had to put with that the iud into me like the thing that you normally put in with Yeah, just basically the
whole by us open. And also I didn't realize and so I recently spoke to my doctor to release medicine so the five boids wouldn't grow back, because you know, five boards are not something that you can you can remove them, but they can come back. And since she knew I was gonna be recovering for a long time, I could a year later be back with five boids. So I don't have five boys and out.
Thank god.
I just got checked maybe like a week ago. But yeah, so now that's why for me, time is really of the essence. It's like Tiffany now, like everything has to be on hold. If you want to have a kid, you basically have to, you know, do it now. And so yeah, it's so, I mean, I can't say I'm prepared for a miscarag but I know that it's possible, and I don't know. I know people who are like on cycle seven. I don't know what that must feel like, where you try again and you.
You know, you go again and put the embrys. I don't know what that must feel like.
So I just you know, one cycle at a time, and you know, prayerfully that this is my this is it.
You know, I do this cycle.
It takes really well, and I don't have to do it like, you know, again and again. That's why I'm kind of hoping for twins because I'm not gonna lie. I do not want to go through this process again. And I think I really would like to have like more than one kid because we have Supergirl, but she's twelve, and I feel like there's nothing like growing up with
a sibling close in age. Yeah, and so I would like, you know, if I have the opportunity, I want to give that, you know, to my child because they'll have a sister. But you know, I know, like Lisa, I was nine when my baby sister, Lisa was born, so I was like, I'm an adult.
You know, we didn't actually grow up playing together, you know.
Yeah, I mean Supergirl's a lost cause anyway.
She is ready supergirls, like bring the baby.
Home for now, for now. You know when she when when you came home his wife, she reacted so well to that.
No, I know, yeah yeah, but yeah, so I mean.
Wait, do you need to do you need to go take shot or something? I heard that job.
No, I have, like I put it, you have a two hour window, so I have plenty. Okay, yeah, but I'm like, yeah, whenever I hear it, I'm.
Like, no, no more shot. It's something else being a woman, I tell you.
Listen. I was just complaining to my husband, like I haven't talked to my mother in law since Christmas. And I was adding, you know, a week after Christmas. I was like, well it's been a week. And now I'm thinking it's been a month and I haven't called her. And I was just like, man, you know, do you feel guilty for not talking to my dad or my mom? And am I? And He's like, what, I don't think he even texts either of them, Like, no one, there's no expectation for him to visit them or call them.
And I'm like, do you see what's happening here? Like I'm actually stressed out, and she's mad at me for not communicating more. And it's just like such a double standard. So I know that's it's different than you know, the fertility things, but yes, it is something being a woman. There's just such it's just such a different game, such a different game because.
You're expected to still like do everything.
It's like, oh, you took a shot, okay, so you're gonna show up and still come to work. Oh you like you know, Oh yeah, a miscarriage, oh you know, but you still have to like show up. And it's just like, oh, it's just.
What Superman going through? What's he up to?
For real? You know?
Like I mean honestly, I mean obviously we have amazing husbands, but it's not the same.
Like today, I literally was.
Like, like I came from the accountant. I was feeling so overwhelmed, and I was like, oh, man, like I have to make dinner when I come home, and then I have to take front of me.
So I came home and he saw my face. He's like, are you okay? I was like, what do you want with your chicken? He was like, man, I can make dinner. I was like, no, it's fine because it's said.
I'm gonna make dinner more often, you know, And he was like, honestly, I really I'm not.
I don't want to eat your dinner, right.
I'll just.
Take But it's like, you know cause I feel guilty about that too.
Because I'm like, oh, I don't make dinner as much as I should. And my good step mom, I feel like Supergirl still hates me half the time.
Some days she's like, hey, taping.
Other days I'm like, good morning, and it's crickd So I'm like, what have I done to you?
Oh, I'm just like and then I'm like, I want to be a good donner. You want to be a good friend.
You're starting Yeah, okay.
I know that.
Say, And to be fair, I'm like, yo, these shots are something else because I'm like, Tetha, you weren't wild like this before.
And it's not until I was talking to my best friend Drina. She was like, so I think the shots aren't and now I'm laughing. I am truly feeling crazy.
So yes, so if i'm you could feel free to really be on in because I know the shots definitely have me on a roller coaster ride.
No, well, I'm really happy that you're sharing, and I mean come on, we I think everyone listening can relate, at least in some parts what you're going through. So well, good vibes, nothing but good vibes, good baby vibes, and uh yeah, keep us posted.
We'll do now.
For my Debbie Downer segue, I feel like we need some kind of sad gong or something. Day thirty three of the government shut down. Yeah, my husband's contributing nothing to the household, and yet he's still having to go to work every day. It sucks. Like there's people who if you're if you're considered non essentially, you don't have to go to work, and yes, that sucks because you know you're not working, you're not getting paid. But he's considered essential, so he still has to go to work
and still isn't getting paid. And he's like it's never been busier, so he's still working late. He had to go to work on Saturday. Like, when is this madness gonna end? I read some article about a guy who's like making Star Wars figurines to make extra income and how people are trying to find side hustles just to just to kind of make ends meet, and I just I can't. I can't take it much longer.
No, you know, it's so crazy because having a government job was supposed to be like the safest job you can get, like that, you know, super secure, great insurance, and now it's like is it you know.
Yeah, tax sis is going to be interesting. You mentioned that earlier. I don't even know. I mean with the irs already being like kind of a shit show. Now when you consider the I mean, they're saying that they're going to do their best to get everything out on time per usual. But they're saying that, but I don't know if it all you know, things will actually happen, because what are we supposed to start getting w well, you don't know, but the end of Jenny right.
Right, yeah, yeah, and it even affects everyone, like I two of my companies, I switched from an ES Corp to a SA corp that's different that that means I'll be taxed differently.
Submitted this stuff in November through my account. Of course he did it December. They were like closed, and so now he's trying to call because we have to do our taxes and so we don't know how to file am I an escorp, am I a C Corp.
And there's nobody to ask. That's totally.
That's the difference is like tens of thousands of dollars in taxes because if they say no, we're not going to allow you to be a sea corp, then I owe more. And if they say yes, you could be a sea corp, than I owe less, and so you know it, even though well, yeah, no, oh, there's no there's no one to answer.
He's called and.
Yeah, because you have to be you know, you have to be approved. And he's like, well, we're gonna we're gonna move forward with the thinking that you're a CE corp. But they might come back and say otherwise, or they might say, hey, you could be a sea corp, but you can't. It can't be since January first. We'll only let you since when you're filed in November. So there's no it could be three different answers and so that
so it affects, It affects let's shut down. It's affecting everyone, even if you don't directly work for the federal government. And it's just I don't I don't like what's the end goal here? You know, well, I know what the end goal is.
But the wall chaos distraction. Well, it's also impacting people in the mortgage process. We've heard about that recently. So if you're like a federal worker and your bank is asking you for, you know, records of your payment in the middle of an underwriting phase. They don't just do that at the beginning of a loan application. They'll come
at the very end too. If you're like closing and do another check of all your records, and if all of a sudden you know you've been furloughed, that could that could you know, throw a wrench in your plan unless you kind of talk to your lender. But on the on the bright side, we did recently write a story about a bunch of banks kind of offering assistance
to federal workers who've been furloughed. So if you've got loan payments due, or you're going to miss your credit card payment or something like that, call up your bank and check out their website and see if they offer any kind of financial hardship program. They're typically used after like natural disasters. But it's been good to see banks doing the right thing and agreeing to work with workers, because this is seriously out of anybody's hands except for our elected officials.
Yeah. No, that has been really good to see.
I've seen a lot, and I've seen a lot of people giving and like restaurants like offering free lunches, and it's just you know, there's been a lot of just like heartwarming things.
But it would just be nice for people.
I honestly, I can't imagine, you know, when I was a preschool teacher.
Being like, oh, no check for no check for the whole month. I don't even know.
Yeah, that's crazy.
It's time for questions. I guess guess the song ah was it's time for questions?
I yeah, I don't do it again, but I don't.
Know, oh, because you know, I was trying to think, like, what's the second part of the melody?
Oh, I get a I went.
For those of you guests, I want you to tweet us at the BA podcast and let us know if you know what that tune is, the questions tune.
You can rewind it to hear it again, but don't actually do it again.
All right, so you could email us your questions.
Ask Brown Ambition Podcasts at gmail dot com.
I'm actually gonna dig into the Dreamcatchers group on Facebook Extreamcatchers, Colon Live Richer with a bunch Ofista. This question comes from Well, because this is a private group, I'm not going to say her her name. I'm going to say her name is Maria. Maria says, what are you?
What is your thought?
What are your thoughts on paying a credit prepare agency monthly to clean up your credit compared to doing it yourself? Also, is it better to dispute items or negotiate a settlement for deletion? So credit pair versus doing yourself dispute or negotiat a settlement for deletion?
This is Maria? What say you, Manadra?
Yeah?
Credit repair, I mean this is one of those topics that or one of those things that isn't necessarily nefarious or predatory but easily can get into that can get into that lane. So you have to really be careful when you're vetting, when you're vetting a credit repair firm, and make sure that your expectations of them are realistic and that the value of them taking the time to do something that you could do yourself is worth it to you to pay for it. That would be my warning.
So read reviews, you know, check see if there there have been complaints about them online. The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau still publishes a report where they track, you know, complaints against different financial institutions. Uh, you know, and and yeah, I just have a hard time saying it's it's it can help, and I think it can be helpful in certain situations, especially for people who just feel over whelmed. But it's not like it's not like the panacea to
all your problems. It won't solve everything. It's not a magic pill that'll remove all your debt and save all your woes. Like Tiffany always says, like, if poor credit histories on your report and it's true, it's it'll stay there.
You know.
Yeah, And that's the thing about when you're like this, uh Maria saying, dispute items and negotiate a settlement for deletion. But here's the thing, and this is the thing that sometimes the disreputable credit repair agencies do. And I hate that so honestly that sometimes dream catches that they've got you thinking that disputing true items is the way to
clean up your credit report. It's true, like when you dispute something, you're saying, hey, this is not true, but if you did indeed swipe your visa and oh, visa, that's true. So you're really not supposed to dispute that because and less visa says you owe five hundred when you know you only.
Owe two hundred. You know.
Yeah, So to me saying should you dispute items, will only dispute it if it's not true, or negotiate a settlement for a deletion. Now, negotiating a settlement, I mean to me, here's the thing. It really kind of depends on what it's worth to you. Now, if you owe fifty thousand dollars and you want to negotiate a settlement down to ten, it's going to be worth to me that's probably worth the hit to your credit report.
But no, that.
Because if basically they've forgiven forty thousand dollars worth of debt, you're likely going to have to pay taxes on what was not paid because what's not paid is considered income to the federal government, right, So that's one you have to keep that in mind. So you might have to pay, you know, twenty five thirty percent on that money that wasn't paid.
But sometimes that's still worth it to some folks.
But I've seen people settle, like, you know, five hundred dollars worth of debt, and it's not necessarily worth it if you can pay that off, because like having a settlement on your credit report can really give you a nasty thing. And I don't know that it's worth it for five hundred dollars, you know, So it's really up to you to decide.
Is that being like more painful than or worse for your credit than just the continuous you know, non payment of debt, like if you're not being able to make your payments and finally you just settle it.
Yeah, so I say this, So this is what was told to share it with me.
Like I remember I was deciding whether it's to settle, and I and had already not. This is like when my mortgage I had already not paid for a longer period of time, and my friend MICHAELA who's a lawyer, was like, we're here now, Tiffany.
Like I was like, oh no, no, I don't want it to because I was talking about foreclosure. And she's like, uh, you haven't paid your mortgage in a year.
It was basically like your credit score is already in the gutter. This is just you kicking the can in the gutter. I was like, okay, So so basically, yes, if you are behind for a long time, then settling is not a huge thing. But let's just say I wouldn't come out the gate settling if you don't have to unless you're really going to save a significant amount of money that's worth.
It because settling.
Think you have to think about this way which you're telling future lenders, is I don't pay back, Like, if you lends to me, there's a high likelihood that I'm only going to give you some of your money back, and no lender wants to see that.
Yeah, and when you settle too, like, lenders typically won't settle with you unless you're really delinquent already, Like you your months behind on payments, so I would you know, if you miss one payment or you know, a few months of your payments, a lender may not be prepared
to settle with you until it gets really bad. So you have to understand you maybe, like if you plan on settling, you you would have to have the stomach to watch your credit score tank because it takes a long time of non payment for them to be to consider settling that debt. But you know, and often with settling debt. Even if a credit repair gets you a debt settlement deal, which honestly you can do yourself simply by asking, you know, I can't pay ten, but I
have six. Even if they did, often they require a lump sum payment right away. So if you don't have the money up front, that can be bad. I mean, it can be worthless because yes, they've negotiated for you, but you don't have the money to pay it off, so you're back where you started. That's one of the reasons why we recommend reaching out to agencies like the
National Foundation for Credit Counseling. They have sort of a lift of you can they'll match you with a credit counselor and they can help you set aside money to pay off your debt and get you on a debt repayment plan through their system. And it's it can be I believe, like twenty five dollars a month to get that type of support from the NFCC. And they're a nonprofit and highly reputable, reputable, and I can I'm happy to share a link to their their site in the in the notes.
Yeah, I like them, And so it's a NFCC dot org.
Right, ORG, I believe, So let mean I can check, I'll send I'll put a link in the show notes.
Yep.
And then because to me, the only the only kind of entity that you can settle without taking like like this immediate hit that I've seen is like when I settled my my my hospital bill and so it didn't actually it went to like internal collections at the hospital, so they hadn't, like sad it to like the credit bureaus.
So I was able to settle.
But when I looked on my credit score, it didn't it didn't go on my credit report because they had not reported it yet that they sent it to their internal collections versus like the you know, the normal collections bureaus that report to you know, like Experience Equifacts, TransUnion, so hospital bills.
There's a lot more flexibility when it comes to settling.
Yeah, I've definitely settled some. It's not that I didn't pay. I just forgot I didn't they had sent a bill for like you know how you go the doctor and you get some lab tests and then yeah, you get bills from like these random labs and you forget what they are because it's like two months later anyway, that happened and I ended up just I just kept being so frustrated, and she was like, look, do you want to just get rid of this for forty dollars? And I was like sure, and that was that was easy.
So good question. Just watch out for credit repair firms up for instead a credit counseling nonprofit if you can start there.
We have a good question, do you want to I want to ask another one. This one is nice and light, so I'm gonna say. Her name is Tiara. Sierra says, what are your What are some of your financial goals for twenty nineteen? Mine is to start saving for a down payment for a house and to take this IT class and start making some real money. Okay, Tiara, So what are your financial goals for twenty nineteen?
Recover from home ownership in twenty eighteen. Yeah, rebuild back up my emergency fund to a place where I'm really happy and feeling confident. I would say, also, I know I have my own goals for my health. I think that's also tied up in financial wellness somehow. I mean I feel like if I'm not well and I can't work, then that puts my family at a disadvantage in my household at a disadvantage. So I'm working on that, yeah, And I I think career wise, I always think about
those types of goals. I'm fortunate to be in a position where I feel like every other month there's new challenges and new things to sink my teeth into it. I'm always feeling challenged by the work. And one of the things that I've recognized though in the last sort of few months or not a few months, but the last year, is that I could definitely learn some skills that other people that I work with know instead of having to rely on them to do things for me.
And it's not that I want to do their job, but I want to better educate myself about a particular strategy that feeds a lot of the direction of what
we do here. Andy. I've already set up kind of conversations with the person who leads the team that does this part of the strategy for our company, and he's going to help me learn so that I can sort of walk into meetings feeling more confident in my own knowledge about the subject matter and then be able to call people on their bs when they're not, you know, doing what they say they're going to do or they're not,
you know, giving us the direction that we need. And that's actually going to be a big game changer for me, I feel like in my career, because it'll make me even more valuable if I speak that, if I'm just multi lingual and other sort of types of strategies and conversations at the company smartiatti, I'm trying.
Mine, honestly.
I just I still feel like I'm not doing right by my retirement plan.
And so one of my that's one of my.
Big goals, is to one really feel comfortable like and like, Okay, this is my clear retirement plan. This is how much I'm going to have by this date, and you know, because right now I just feel like I'm throwing money in there and I'm like, I don't know what's happening.
I'm just making money as a budgetista. But I feel like on the back end, I'm not quite as secure, like I'm good at savings, yes, and you know, we invested by purchasing you know, our house in the way that we did, but I don't feel like I'm solid in my retirement planning. And two, I I've already had like to talk with my parents, but I really want to sit down and like.
Make sure that.
There you know that their will is where it's supposed to be, and you know their long term health care plans they're supposed to be. So thankfully we're in a space where, you know, after talking with them for like like about a year, they're really comfortable. They're like, yes, So a friend of mine who's a lawyer and she does this.
Is actually gonna come. I'm hoping by the beginning of February.
That's why I asked her, and she's going to sit down with my parents and start the process of just having these things together. My dad had a really bad cough the other day and it wasn't anything because crazy, But my dad has never been like he's not. He doesn't have high blood pressure, he doesn't have diabetes, he doesn't like the stuff that plagues older people. My dad's in his seventies, does not plague and he plays tennis
three times a week. I mean, I didn't even know what wheat bread was when I was a kid, but we just knew Daddy ate brown bread. That's what I used to call it, like, eh, brown bread. He's always been really, really healthy, so.
When he had a call old. We were all like, wait, why is daddy coughing? No. Meanwhile, the doctor was like, you know, we poor man. We took that man to the murderer. Your doctor, no im because we have never when I I'm never. I was like, we were like, we don't know what's wrong. They were like, he has a cold. He's gonna be fine. My dad was not happy with us, Like I told you, I was fine. I was like, but that we definite see you sick. And so yeah, he's more than fine. He had a cold.
They literally gave him like flow naise and like he's like allergies and a cold, flow naise and like us next.
And I was like, oh god, I know.
But what it made me think of though, because like I said, you know, my dad's in the mid seventies. What it made me think of is that are we you know, prepared prepared? You know, like I said, he's in really good health. And you know, the doctor was like because I was like, oh, but he's getting a little skinny and my dad's like my doctor was like, when's the last time you saw an obese.
You know, eighty year old. No. I was like, hmm, this is true.
He was like, people get a little CLIBBERTI but he's fine. He plays tennis, he's healthy, he's happy, nothing's wrong. But it did make me think about the future. So I'm having my attorney and my friend Tony come and drop some paper.
So that's like a big goal for me.
I've really been thinking about like future planning and future planning for my family, like myself, my husband, a bonus bonus daughter, and then also planning for like my parents and making sure that like their wishes are fully expressive.
We all know what that is, so that those are like, really my big main goals for twenty nineteen.
Stop harassing my poor father, Yo, you have no idea. When they when they told us flown AI's and mucinex, the look he gave.
I was like, They're like, thank you for giving us an opportunity to bill your insurance multiple thousands of dollars.
I know, I was like, yikes.
If I was like, darn it, if my dad ever really gets sick, he's never gonna want to go to the hospital.
But still I had to. We had ten now.
But it's just good to know that, like he's in great health, and it just goes to show you when you take care of yourself, you know, you know, if you're fortunate enough to live this to be a little older, that your body will take care of you.
Yeah, we should set some brown ambition goals.
Yeah we should.
I mean I think we need to be at Essence Fest recording this year. You always go without me because I always forget until it's like the week of essence Fest and you're like brown boosts and going to essence Fest.
But you know what to be all the way, honest, essence is extra brown.
And usually they're like, what are you doing tomorrow? I'm like, essence Fest, don't do this.
They're like, hopefully so we Yeah, so, I mean definitely we're gonna work. Like you know, Dreina, I've got the best publicist in the world, but every year she does definitely does push early, and it's always me.
I don't know, I don't know that it's like side come.
So hopefully we'll get like a little bit more notice. Well maybe we'll be able to go like a with a brand who's already going to be there, So.
We'll we'll work. We'll work both angles.
Oh yeah, I don't need like an invitation I'll just show up. All we need is, like, you know, a mic and a computer. We can just hang outside the front entrance and just pull people in. I'll be like Oprah Gale, turn down Ambition. What can go wrong? What can go wrong?
Yeah? So are we good on questions?
Hey?
Guys, did I forget ask your questions? Please? We love your questions.
Go ahead and email us at Brown Ambition Podcast at gmail dot com. You can also send us a message on Facebook, on Instagram, on Twitter. We're at the BA podcast on Twitter and Brown Ambition on Facebook.
Yes, now it's time for a booster break or booster break. I'm gonna go first, and I'm going to take a break. Have you seen I mean everyone's talking about it on the instagrams?
The fire Festival? Oh document, which one? So?
Yes, I've watched the one and I've yeah, I died it was so funny.
You if you've watched the Hulu you will love the Netflix. Watch both.
That's what I've heard. The Netflix one's supposed to be really good.
Yeah, it is beyond And I don't even know if I want to break it or boost it.
I don't know either way, you want to like boost the you want to like boost the poor people who were you know, the poor local Bahamians who were you know, left it broke by this whole festival, and then.
Like and poor not asn't poor as in like this in case they all start reading, that's like not poor, like no money poor poor, like this is an unfortunate thing that happened to them poor.
Just to be clear, money many people lost lots of money like I had. I heard one restaurant owner lost like tens of thousands of dollars, Like she took it out of her Yeah, out of her own nest egg. I'm totally just stomping all over your boost. Sorry, I'll stop.
No, it's no, no, you're right no, but the thank goodness.
So they had her do an actual go fund me go fund me that they're going to work to make sure it's really herd, that she's going to get it. Last time I checked it was upward. It was up to one fifty, but she put up fifty thousand. So for those of you who haven't watched, the Fire Festival was supposed to be this big, huge music so think Coachella, but upscale. It was supposed to take place in the Bahamas. But there's a scam artist named Billy.
I forget his last name, but anyway, he and jar Rule, which.
Is how random I know hip hop mogul.
Mogul is a stretch we'll just say former hip hop rapper or hip hop star.
So they got together and well, what was I didn't know this.
Originally Fire was an app so you can book like just like musical acts, and they wanted to promote the app, and someone suggested a festival, so they decided to have it in the Bahamas.
But from the very beginning it was clear that it was a scam.
So apparently this Billy guy is a master scammer that he's been scamming his whole life. And I don't think he thought that it would go as big because normally what he did would was that he scam and be able to easily keep the money because there was no
real recourse. But this grew so big, so many people wanted to go to the Fire festival that they paid a ton of money, and it just grew, and because of social media and people, you know, he had people come to other countries and so he got investors involved, and he was like forging wire transfers to tell people that they were he sent the money. It was just a whole bunch of stuff that he did. And so he's now saving serving six years in federal prison as
he should, if not longer. And yeah, so many people lost a ton of money or didn't get paid at all. But what it really was interesting was to see the power of social media and influencers, because that's why so many people like Kendall Jenner posted about fire, all these models posted about fire, and as a result, you know, it made.
Like, you know, all these people want to go.
But it's a really good like I would say, if it was me, I would say, hmm, watch the Hulu one first, because well maybe it depends because and the Holy one you get to really see how crazy this guy is.
But in the Netflix one, it is.
Both hilarious and ghastly.
It's they're both really good though, But I definitely spent like.
Two nights watching it, and I was just like, Wow, the audacity, the unmitigated goal of this guy.
And then even after that, Mandy, even.
After that he was out on bail and started a new scam while on bail.
That kind of is like a pathological liar. He needs to be in jail forever.
Yeah, and that's what they said, that they're a psychologist, was like, you know, he's someone who will always be scamming.
It's just part of him.
And so yeah, it was, like I said, it was really good. So it's kind of like a boost break. It was like, there were really interesting documentaries and everyone's been talking about it.
So I definitely highly recommend them both.
Highly recommend yeah to do i'mb you say you're gonna boost a break, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do a break and a boost. So the break, I mean, it's a break and a boost at the same time. But I I've been living under a rock. And there's this reporter in Mississippi, Jackson, Mississippi, who she claims was
told her natural hair was unprofessional she was wearing. She started wearing her hair natural on the air and her news director pulled her aside and said that it was unprofessional, aster to change it back, and then later on she was fired. And I'm brushing up on the details of the story, but it sounds like she's fouled a complaint with the EEOC. What does that stanforget? Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.
Okay EEOC, But anyhow, EEOC handles a lot of workplace litigation fouled by employees who have been wronged on you know, matters of inequality, so gender discrimination, race discrimination. So yeah, this story is really, uh, really shocking. I think it's not unusual because we've seen in the news lately, like you know, if you're a news reporter and a black woman as a news reporter, if you wear your her natural like, we've seen women get called out by callers,
like to the show. There was that one viral clip of some like a voicemail that some uh news viewer like left this poor reporter because you changed her hair. That was really racist, and people will flood the comments and leave for you know, racist remarks or whatever. I used to do videos at Yahoo, and when I started transitioning my hair, you get like hair comments in the in the comments. Yeah, it was just like par for the course. However, like to actually get fired, I thought
we were just beyond this. So it's just shocking to me to hear if these allegations are true that she might have been let go because of her appearance, and if her natural hair played a role in it, and she talks about how when she was hired, you know, she was wearing her hair straight and pressing it with flat iron, and you know what it takes, we all know, burning your hair to no end to get it to lay flat, and how you know, changing it halfway into her role or however long it was, you know, to
have that pushback from her manager. Like I just yeah, it's like some it's like some traditional corporate environments. It's still like you're stuck in nineteen, you know, fifteen, which is just super super sad. But she's getting a lot of attention. So hopefully something good comes of it.
Yeah, hopefully that would be honestly, yeah, because.
I just yea, it's just unfortunate, and I just can't imagine because, like you said, I need too Like I you know, when I taught preschool, I had a fro or once I'm like a little Michael Jackson afro. But I was teaching preschool, no one was like hey, you know, and then after that the fro, I had twists, I had braids. But as a teacher, especially of little ones, no one, and plus I taught in Newark, where you know the majority of the kids look like me, so parents weren't like, hey, what's that hair?
It's like you have the same hair as me, you know.
So then I became you know, I started a budgetista where I could do whatever, but I mean to be
all the way honest. I'm thinking to myself, if like my locks the way they are now, you know, they lay quote unquote neat, you know, so I don't know that I would be on TV with the fro, you know what I mean, like like the real and like the news and stuff that I don't know they would they would accept me or allow me to be on if I really think about it, Like I'm wearing my locks the way I'm wearing them now because I like them.
But you know, I mean I realize now that like you.
Know, it's it's in alignment what with like you know what, even though their locks they look really neat. I've heard people say that like, oh my gosh, like you hair are locks, but they're really neat, And I'm like, and you know, it's almost like code for they almost look like regular hair, you.
Know, pretty good for black hair exactly.
So the coded language.
Yeah, I mean it is and it's hard, because yeah, it's hard.
It is.
But I'll tell you one thing. You know, put me in the place of her news director, and it wouldn't have been an issue. Like, we need people who look like us and go, you know, identify with us to be in places of power, because then it becomes normal. It's unusual because and I'm not saying that we shouldn't have white people in leadership roles, like that's not at
all what I'm saying. I don't want to be misconmistry, but we need to have more people sitting around the table having those types of conversations.
Yeah, because people like you said, it must be really hard to walk the line when you're like, okay, so this is what she means by that.
Okay, So but it's also good.
Because I mean, I don't believe, I don't believe in coincidences, and that you.
Know who you are, who you came from.
All of those things are critical components of where you are now and your ability to be where you are because one, you know, like people can just look at you and be like, oh wow, man, it's in a position to power.
And she wears her hair like big and beautiful.
They don't always say that I will tell you people, but I will I will say one thing that I've struggled with. I haven't really struggled with anything on my team, but I do get people don't assume that I'm the boss sometimes and it's not like I let it bother me, but it does happen. I noticed the front desk person there was a new one recently, and she made a comment that led me to believe that, oh, she doesn't know that I run the whole team, you know, And
it's it's just interesting. You have to kind of clock those types of assumptions. It's it's like it's the same thing like if a black woman tells you she's going to be a character in a movie and she wants you to guess who she's going to be, a lot of times people might guess like, oh, you're the villain, or oh you're the you know, you're like the rookie or whatever. Would you guess that they're the main character of the movie, like the lead in the film. Yeah, it's just just interesting.
Yeah, it's very very very fascinating. That's code for it gets on my freaking.
Mare sometimes sometimes.
No, this has been awesome though, but yeah, well one last little boost. Did I talk about really want to see that movie Little with Marseilles.
Yes, first of all, Marseille Martin.
Right, it's a ray and is a Virginia King.
No, no, no.
It's Regina. I don't kill me black people.
I'm gonna claim fifty percent white right now. I'm leaving you under the under the bus. Bye, I forget.
Oh man, I'm like, it's the other Regina. Don't kill me, I know, just take my black card right now.
Regina Hall, Regina Hall, you know, Okay, okay.
You see you brought it back in. You brought it back in. So yeah, so that's just it just looks like a dope movie. And I just love all that black girl magic. So that's a nice little boost.
I love it. Yeah, it looks really cute. I'll definitely see it.
Ten husband, Wow, we went from everywhere. Isn't that so crazy?
I went from overwhelmy, so like, I swear, now I got to take another shot.
I'm like, I.
Can't, man, I can do this for the twyms tip.
My emotions are all over the place.
It's it's the worst when you don't even know that your emotions until you realize you're like, wait.
I'm not getting crazy. Oh okay, okay, okay.
So yeah, of course you are a vessel of life.
That's crazy.
Surround yourself in flowers and get it. Do a Beyonce photo shoot or something.
Just like I haven't listened to a indie irey lately. Oh,