The second date of.
One of our listeners, Jack emailed us saying he just went on the most unique first date he's ever had.
Oh I love hearing.
Even though he says he probably wouldn't ever do it again, he says he did have a good time, which is funny. It's what most guests say when they come on our show. That fun Yeah, probably never gonna do that again.
It once in a lifetime experience.
For the reason Jack, Welcome to what might be the most regrettable experience of your life.
Hey guys, attitude.
Yeah, yeah, we're gonna try and change that by the time if you leave us. But what was the name of the lady you went out with?
Her name was Nicole and we met on bumble cool.
Oh you met online?
Like before we get to whatever your date was. Lately, we've been asking people to tell us about what was on the person's profile if they met them online.
That the last time at backfire.
So we can only improve on what happened from before. All right, I like to get to know.
The people before we call them. So what was on Nicole's profile?
So her bio this is what her bio says. It says witty sarcastic and won't put up with your blank Yes, I.
Would assume I like her already. They don't wonder you swiped.
On her very important though.
Describe the picture to us, bro important to you?
Yeah, yeah, I know women like you. Yes, I know. It's because I know what to not look for.
So the first picture is that her, like, I guess she's on a hike or something.
It looks like it's toxic Brokas.
Like millions of people going hike exactly.
There's millions of toxic people out.
That just means that she's a little low maintenance. She likes to be outside first, about to hike once in five years.
Maybe talking about her picture isn't the best idea.
Let's get back to the bio. What else does she say about herself?
Oh, this was the funniest part. It says that she loves to celebrate minor holidays. Yeah, I had the same reaction. I message her about it, and she said, minor holidays like Jellybean Day, National compliment of Stranger.
Day, basics, there's one every day.
I think, what'd you guys end up doing for your date? That was so unique?
So I kind of like used that last set as an inspiration for our first date.
Oh really, that's cute.
Yeah. We decided which day we were going to meet up, and I looked on the calendar to figure out which minor holiday was on that day, and I found out it was that Thomas Crapper Day.
Thomas Crapper. Thomas Crapper.
So Thomas Crapper, he's the guy who invented like the modern toilet.
That's why we call it that.
Flusher.
Wait a second, though, what kind of date are you gonna do around Thomas Day? Are you sure you didn't she was a different day, different holidays.
Well, I looked it up, and there's actually the thing online where you can find like a list of top toilets in town. There's like this list of ten of like the most beautiful toilet. You can actually go to each one and visit it.
To visit the coolest restrooms in the city.
That's exactly what we did. That's what we did for our birth date.
Amazing Did she not fall in love with him?
Are you.
Think it's so funny?
Well?
I guess what? Did she think? She liked that idea?
I mean it seemed like she got a kick out of it. I think she thought it was really funny and and honestly, I could admit some of the toilets were beautiful, like some of the views were incredible.
Wow, did you spring this on her? Or did you tell her pre you know, like, did she know she was getting herself into that night?
I told her beforehand.
Okay, that's good, because that's not like that wouldn't be a good surprise.
And remember it's her like, so I'm sure she was into it. Is this a situation where you just go to all these different toilets and take a look?
Or are we actually what are we doing here? Look? Or leak?
We used a couple of them if the timing was right.
I don't like any of this, honestly.
We have some drinks.
Yeah, there were a couple of restaurants like bars. We were able to get a drink at a couple and like snack on some food as well, So there was some normal, you know, date activity going on as well. It wasn't just toilet viewing toilet talk.
Okay, well that sounds good. What about so how did it end?
Double flush?
It ended? Okay? I think I mean we were both really tired because we saw all ten all in the and walking to each one.
Yeah, oh god, too exhausted to get a little kiss in there.
Yeah, no kiss. She just gave me a quick hug and she said call me.
Yeah, I think you went to too many Oh too, man, I see what.
You did there.
Yeah.
Sometimes I really hate our own show.
But I see on your email here it says it's been a week since that date happens. So we're going to play a song, we'll come back. We're gonna call Nicole for you.
I can't wait to hear her review of this date.
And I want any more details than we've already done that.
But I think it's fascinating.
She's it's coming up with your second date update. Next update.
You're in the middle of a second date update update, and we're gonna find out how the couple is doing right after you here Part two, in the middle of.
A second date update with Jack, who went on a toilet tour of the city recently.
So funny because they.
Found the list online of the top ten toilets in the downtown area, went to all of them in honor of Thomas Crapper Day. Because there's date in Nicole like celebrating funny minor holidays, and that.
Happened to be the holiday that their date fell on.
But here's the thing, before we call on the coal I had a quick conversation with producer.
Boyd out in the hallway.
Yeah what And something that we actually do on this show, surprisingly is our due diligence. Before we call people, we double check and put their phone numbers into our database.
Do we do do that?
We do do it just to make sure you know we're not getting scammed or people are just trying to get free dinners off of us using our gift cards. And when we put in a Cole's number in, we got a match. She's been on the show with us before as someone asking us for a second date.
Shut up on second date before we have.
So, Jack, here's the deal. We're still gonna do this for you, but I'm just letting you know now it's gonna be different probably if she does pick up, because she's gonna know who we are.
And she's gonna remember that you're on the line. Jack.
Yeah, she'll know that you're there already.
Yeah that's a little odd.
Wait did she get a date when she was on? Was it like a successful one or a failed one? From what we found when she called us.
She thought she was going out with a guy who was from a really wealthy family, but when we called him turned out to be a different guy. She had googled someone who had the same.
Name, so she didn't want a date in mcamnon and I remember, Yeah, they didn't go out of the rich guy.
Yeah, so wait, are we going into this thinking she's shallow?
People are?
Okay, let's call Nicole and see if she answers and what she has to say.
You're ready to do this, Jack.
Yeah, yeah, let's see what happened.
All right, here we go, Hello and Nicole.
Yeah, her voice sounds really.
Hi, Nicole, it's your favorite morning show.
If you say the wrong name, it's going to be very upsetting.
Is this Ryan Secret?
Oh my god? Is this Jeff and Brooke?
Yeah?
That was going to be awkward.
What's up, friend, I'm still didn't quite get the name right.
It's close enough. Yeah. How you doing.
I'm good?
How are you?
How's your dating life?
Well that's it's been okay.
Yeah, better than the last time we chatted.
Really, so an improvement. That's a good sign.
We're not surprised to hear that, actually, because we heard about.
A date that you went on recently.
Wait what Yep, this is happening, Nicole. Somebody actually emailed us to get a hold of you.
Oh I'm on the other side now.
How does it feel.
Oh no, we really get like a frequent flyer card for this, a little punch card, a frequent failure card.
So I don't know if you know who would have emailed, but we're reaching out now on behalf of Jack.
Oh.
I like that, Nicole.
No, he's nice.
Duode.
Yeah, I'm dying to hear like your review of the date, the toilet date that you guys went on.
Yeah, yeah, exactly, well exactly. I love that he was creative and that he really read my profile and saw that I was really into celebrating little holidays and went out of his way to make a date that was tailored to that. So that totally won me over. There was super sweet, super cool.
We thought that was pretty thoughtful.
Yeah, and it was Thomas Crapper Day, which.
Very funny, very creative, but also kind of gross.
Yeah, it was.
Well, it's like you would think that if it was a list of the ten best toilets, they're all going to be really clean.
You know, they all like had candles and nice lighting and you know we're clean, okay.
And he said, you guys got to have drinks at different bars and maybe.
Yeah, you know, he had the whole thing mapped out, so there were like stopped for snacks and drinks and didn't you like, well, at one of the bars, they had those really big pretzels, and you know, we were trying to fit everything in, so.
The whole pretzel in your mouth.
Relate.
Well, he wanted to do like all ten places in one night, so okay, we also have like a you know, like.
Timing, right, But he's ambitious, so that's a good thing.
Right again, great stuff. But he hadn't finished the pretzel before we went to the next bathroom, so he brought the pretzel into the bathroom.
Ohel in the bathroom.
Chewing the pretzels.
I mean you were there, you could open all the doors. He didn't have to touch anything nasty in there.
Yeah. Toilet, that's where the most particles are all over the place.
Nobody was flushing toilets at the same time he was eating right the bathroom.
Yeah, but it got worse.
Okay, there's more.
Yeah, So the next one was next to an office building. Okay, so we had to go in an elevator and he brought a bowl of soup.
Soup, What what I mean soup? Like, where did you get the soup from?
So we had stopped at the next place. He was like, oh, this place was great soup. So we got soup, and I didn't realize, like we we walked out.
I turned around. We're in the.
Elevator and he's got a bowl of soup. And he brought the soup into the bathroom.
Wait, he's eating soup on the toilet.
It just in the bathroom.
Put it down on the urinals so we can take a selfie.
That's even just too far from me, that is bathroom.
Well, this is a new wrinkle to this story that we hadn't heard yet.
And I also kind of want to see the selfie of you next to a jurnal.
Actually I'm actually that too, but the hot bowl of chilis nicole.
You probably already know that Jack's been listening the whole time.
Oh yeah, why don't you hop in here with us and tell us what you were thinking in there?
I sorry, I'm a little I don't see this is weird. I don't understand that putting.
A bowl of soup on the urnal is weird.
Yeah, braw, but no one else is in there. No one was using the civilities that I wanted to take a picture.
I guess I could give you that if it's empty and it's not being No, I'm not giving him that. And Nicole, did you ever voice your concerns about the open bowl of soup?
No, I'm not going to say anything to this barbarian and brings a soup into the pooper.
Now he's a barbarian.
That's not much because I know I know for a fact, Brook eats burritos on her toilet at home.
But it's my home toilet. I know exactly how clean that place.
Brook, you should be on Jack's side here. You guys are kindred spirits.
Throws me out.
I mean, to be honest, I've always kind of done it. It's just like it's a very convenient place to like I eat most of my breakfast in the bathroom.
No, it's efficient, I guess, like aficient.
Especially on weekdays I'm getting ready for work, I'll just bring my oat meal or whatever I'm eating it to the.
Was doneom.
It's a fibrous meal. You guys, it's a fibrous meal.
How do we know Thomas Crapper didn't eat French onion soup while he was doing his meal?
Little career.
I'm assuming he's a French guy. I don't know.
I mean, I just it's not like it's not like he's going to the bathroom and not washing his hands, right, Thomas, you're washing afterwards?
Yeah, yeah, of course. I mean I observe all the bathroom, Meticutte, but sometimes I have some food in there with me. I don't honestly, I thought everyone did that from time to time.
Maybe not everybody, but a majority maybe. And Nicole, enough people, enough people.
It's a cirk. I mean, here's the thing. It's a quirk, Nicole.
Nicole, this is like a kind of a small thing that we should be able to get over. And if you can, we would send you out for another date on us.
As long as he promises not to bring any food in the bathroom, we can.
Have a second day.
Yeah, Jack, can you agree to do that?
All right? If it means getting another date with you, Nicole, owl, I will cut it out.
Be such a big ask, all right, Yes.
A gentleman Jesus, are you going to go out with this gentleman? Come on?
Okay, okay, Nicole, Yeah, that date didn't go down the crapper brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
It's been a few months since that call, but we've lined our entire studio with paper toilet seat covers because Jack and Nicole are back on with us again.
For an update update.
Oh my god, I can't wait to hear how many toilet dinners they've past.
What's up you too? Welcome back?
Hey, Hey, how's it going?
Okay, you're both there? Okay, where are you at in your relationship?
Well? Things are good.
We actually kept on dating and Jack moved in with me about a month ago.
Oh, how's that been.
It's good.
It's going really well.
Jack. Have you stopped your habit?
Yeah, I mean I kind of had a learn it, but I have been officially, I've been house trained not to eat in the bathroom anymore.
Good.
Yeah, yeah, No, she's been great. I mean, there was one time I caught him eating a possabola in there, which was a little weird.
But Jeah, did you just need to cool down or.
What I mean? It was like July, it was extremely hot.
He has to be like monitored in all times.
It's like, where are you bringing that in the kitchen?
Well, to be fair, since we're sharing stories, she has also some pretty weird bathroom habits as well.
Oh really, okay, here comes the fight later in the apartment.
Yeah, a lot of times I'll hear her singing when she's on the toilet. I'll hear her through the door singing.
Oh God, don't tell.
Him that that's not any worse than eating on the toilet. I don't think hearing like I came in like, women do not do that.
Hey, you know the bathroom has got acoustics.
What can I think?
That's always congratulations. Yeah, we're happy for you guys. Make sure you keep us updated on your relationship. Okay, thank you, that's your second date update update. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.