Hey, you found us.
It's working Jeffrey in the morning and our Second Date podcast. Not like is that hard to find these days since we're charting on the top comedy charts every week on Spotify.
H yeah, welcome. Yeah. I go to beout it every night and I just stream it on five thousand different laptops.
You're the one that's.
I'm sorry, guys, but I'm tired of those ratings.
All right, Hey, thanks for being Aaron. Don't forget.
We do have forty five more minutes of this painful show if you can endure it over on our main feed. Just go to Brook and Jeffrey for that one. But right now, let's get to what you came forward. That's a second date.
Yes, second date updates. You know, the picture you see on someone's dating profile compared to what they look like in real life can be vastly different. Oh yeah, and just look at jose in his passport photo, which hasn't been updated in twenty seven years.
Wow, doesn't make any sense.
Still, he still has his baby teeth in his passport. No, I was like in my early twenty but.
They make you take a picture and send it in every time you're Okay, I'm not going to go down this road again.
Yeah.
The point is the photo compared to real life can be very, very shocking and different, and really that first moment when you finally see your date in person can be huge.
Yeah.
Apparently that was the case for one of our listeners, Kendrick, who needs our help today. Kendrick, Welcome to the show.
I'm going guys, Okay, your date was a good surprise or you were the bad surprise.
We want to tell us about this woman that you met. Where you met her.
I thought it was a good surprise when we matched online. Okay.
And what's her name?
Danielle?
Danielle.
Okay, So before we find out what she looks like, what did her dating profile look like?
Oh my gosh, she was gorgeous. Ye had all the right writing, the right pictures, all that.
Oh my god, I'm dead.
No way she was going to look like this in real life.
Right, you're even doubting it before you met her, right, Okay?
Set the expectationation's love for the in person meetup.
And this is kind of.
Funny because there's two things. They either look really good in their profile. There's no way they look at that in real life, or some people look way better in person, Like you see their profile and they're like, oh my gosh, like you look better.
In natural lighting.
I know that is what it's like hanging out with me. So tell us what did you do for your date? Kendrick? Where'd you guys go?
So we chose the meet up and we went to one of those big malls that you know has a restaurants shopping mall.
Yeah, okay, that's very old school, right, So.
We were going to walk around and then eventually grab a bike.
Well, you were there, but I want to know about the moment when you saw for the first time in real life, because that's the whole thing.
Right, Like you were you were shocked? Why were you shot?
Run us through that?
Oh yeah yeah yeah I got there first. So she walked in five minutes later, like right after me, right, and oh my god, I was like, bam. She looked like she just stepped out of a TV commercial. Ah TV. Her hair's just flowing.
She off side effects from yes.
She gives you two lawyers.
What do you mean like a TV commercial?
Well, you're not like a model, but I mean like she looks like somebody who could be like running on the beach, you know, in slow motion promoting yogurt.
A model.
That's literally she just had a TV commercial globe.
Okay, wow, okay, okay, So you were surprised she looks than her photos.
Okay, yeah, absolutely.
So it was a good first meeting then, But how did the rest of the day at the mall go?
So we're walking around the mall. I had a big smile on my face because I knew people were looking at us thinking, how did that guy get her? Oh?
And you like that?
Oh? I love it. I'll try not to stare at her a lot. I was making a lot of jokes too.
Wait, sorry, you said you were making a lot of jokes.
Yes, Like we went to one of those places that sells hats and I said to her, you know, like hats have headlights in them.
That's not a joke, my friend, that is a serious spear unlocked.
What is the joke?
Well, I don't really think it's ninety percent. I just made that up because it sounds funny.
The jokes is twenty one.
Did she laugh or was she happening? Yeah, she disgusted, I stand.
She probably didn't she laughed. It was more of an uncomfortable laugh, but she laughed a little bit.
Yeah, Okay, she always knew you were trying to joke.
Yeah, she slowly put the hat back.
Okay, so, okay, you're making jokes. You're comparing her just TV commercial ladies headline.
You gotta call her yogurt girl.
You're right, I'm calling her. You'll play princess. What what did you? And you play princess?
Dude?
From there?
So finally showed up at the seafood. They but we had to put our names in because there was a lot of people there. So there's a little bit of a wait. Okay, good way for it. I was a gentleman. I pulled her chair out, I gave her compliments, good nice. I walked her to her car afterwards, gave her a kiss.
Oh you got a kiss?
Got a kiss? You know, major is just a small little kiss. Okay. But the next day I get a weird text that says, I can't freaking believe you. I don't date low lives Cia.
Oh what did it say?
After lives?
Her name?
She said Celia Sea Like bye, oh God, But I don't know.
What she's talking about. I tried to call her, but she sends me straight to voicemail every time. So I'm turning to you guys, trying to figure out where I went from.
If she has headline and.
I didn't see any headlights when I got to kiss, I don't know.
I know that's how you check.
What a weird thing to say. I can't believe you, Like I don't date low lives. What could you have done? She has a piece of information.
I don't know what it is.
If she found something, Okay, saw something.
And here's the thing you have to know before where we call her. It's not gonna be good if she's calling you a lola.
Yeah, yeah, that's so I need to know what it is, all right.
Maybe it's like, maybe it's something she misunderstood.
I don't know.
I don't know. I'm not liking the tone of you'll play Princess right now, so we're gonna find out she sounds more like googurt Goddess's.
Animal.
Oh, we'll figure out what's wrong with this yogurt girl when we call her and get you your second date update.
Right after this.
Second date update, you'll play Princess dancing around the beach with her crown and television cameras following her all around. That wasn't the date. That's just what played in the head of our listener Kendrick when he saw Danielle for the very first time.
She was TV commercial pretty.
That's right, and they walk the mall together, almost got head lies trying on hats.
Okay, that's just a joke he made.
It was funny, and they ended up at a seafood buffet, had a really really nice time. It all sounds great, But since then, the only communication he's got was a very troubling text from Danielle. What did her text say, again, Kendrick.
I don't low like you so Fia, I also like the sea.
It sounds bad, but I've sent worse text to my mother before. She still want me, so there's a chance there's a good shot at redemption.
Okay, did we hear did you respond to her?
No? I just try to call her, but sheemail immediately.
You didn't like it or anything?
Okay, Yeah, let us do the dirty work for you. I feel you, man, So now we're going to try again, see if she picks up. I'm going to dial her number right now here we go, all right, hulluh, why'd you go.
I don't know, because she's not going to want to talk to us.
Is that text maybe the sigh? Hey is this Danielle?
Good morning?
Hello.
Yes, the whole radio show is on the phone right now, eager to talk to you. We're called Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
I'm a little nervous to tack to you, to be honest.
Why are you guys calling me?
Good question. We do this segment called a second date Update. I'm not sure if you're familiar with that, but it's where we help out our listeners who went out on a date with somebody and they're not getting a second one, to try and figure out why something went wrong, if there was a mistake that happened. We figured there must be some sort of thing that went wrong based on the text message that you sent to our friend Kendrick the other day.
Yeah, oh god, it was not hard to decipher. Yeah, well, I will tell you this. I don't want anything to do with him, so I don't.
Yeah.
I think that that's clear. I think he's just totally confused as to why.
Yes, well, I don't like people who go through my personal things and make.
Me feel uncomfortable and personal, say yeah, I'm not sure what exactly you mean by that.
Wow, I don't know what he's told you or whatever happened. But he was in my business, like literally in my bag, my wallet business?
What what?
What?
How did he go through your Yeah, your purse, your wallet?
What do you mean?
I had to use the restaurant, So I asked him, if you hold my stuff from me?
Were you seated already at this point or is this while you were waiting? Said there was a long wait.
Well we were waiting. I had went to the restaurant.
Oh while you were awaiting, you were like, not in the rest I mean maybe lobby or something gotcha.
Okay, So my purse was only out of my possession for a moment, but I think that's what. He one of my bags and snatched my stuff.
What's STUFFA Now you're accusing him of stealing something from your.
Bag, Well, it surely isn't there anymore, and it sounds minute, but for me, it's the principal.
What did he take my Joba juice car gift cards?
What was it loose or was it in your wallet?
It was in my wallet, right on the front of my wallet. Even go on my.
Walle did you did you see him go through your person take your card? Or are you just assuming that because you're in the bathroom.
I don't have to because how it's not going to jump out of my wallet?
I don't know. All the time, I swear things can jump out of it.
It's so weird to have such a specific thing be stolen, Like if he was going to steal from you, it'd be like, I don't know what credit card something?
And why would he call us to get you on the phone.
Hello.
That's why I'm trying to figure out.
He doesn't know that she knows okay, and you don't know that he knows that. He's been listening on the other line of this phone call the entire time, waiting to talk to you, you know what I mean?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, Hey, why are you saying all this stuff about me? I can't even defend myself.
That's now your chance to defend yourself. I need to hear this.
Yeah, sorry, he's been on the other line listening.
If that wasn't clear, which I mean, you need to tell him.
Like, well, first off, Hendrick, what were you doing in my purse? And why the hell would you take my job of juice.
Car. I don't like having my name drank through the mud like this. Will not be able to defend myself for safe say it? Yeah?
Yeah, Are you saying you're innocent that you didn't take it?
Well, no, I mean I did.
I did.
I took this O.
I thought you were about to like.
Just I knew what I told you.
God, Okay, you're right, Kendrick.
Dude, while and steal from her and then wonder.
Why you don't. I mean, you don't understand that I needed it for my ex.
Okay, power excuse.
All the low life and you couldn't connect this.
Okay, that's a weird statement, dude. Can you explain?
I was gonna give it back or reimburse her on the next day, but she wouldn't answer my calls.
What why do you just buy your own damn jump juice?
My dad? Does no one see that that's an issue that.
You can?
We ask you?
Why are you giving gifts back to your ex girlfriend?
Well, me and I actually aren't together, but we still celebrate our anniversary. We call it an extra versary.
So you what, you stole the gift.
Card for your I borrowed it. So here's our extroversary works, so we get each other a gift card or a card and it's like, no hard, hope you're doing well.
Okay, I don't know that we asked for all of.
This, So you that it's fine for you to celebrate your act by taking from me. And I'm not even with you yet, Like, you don't see anything wrong with that.
You were at the mall. You could have bought anything.
That tight. You probably should not have been going out with me, Kendrick.
You sound like a pickpocket or something.
Why are we even going through the person her wallet? Anybody?
Yeah, well, our extroversary was later that night, so she was taking forever in the bathroom. Right. I was bored.
You were shopping inside of her person.
It looks so weird.
I think you're lying because your height on your life and says that's your fire.
Your lives.
Okay, they're they're both not perfect people.
She is a perfect woman who belongs on the yogurt commercial on television.
The people in commercials tend not to be as tall as they appear on TV. Listen, Okay. The good point is Kendrick is very detail oriented. Because he looked at her license, he made sure that she is who she said.
Like, this is so that is Kendrick.
It sounds like that was a violation going through her stuff and then sounds like.
Yeah, wow, I borrowed. I'm gonna pay her back.
Okay, we're we're just going to back away because now that it's all out in the open, you can talk to Danielle and apologize or say whatever it is that you want to say to the mystery takeover try to win her back here.
Daniel I'm sorry, I got the extroversary day mixed up. I forgot it was later that night and I hadn't gotten her anything. So okay, I didn't want to violate you. I didn't want.
To for that.
Yeah, I mean, can we just which was that gift card?
Worth?
Can we reimburse her for the job?
Well Brook, it's not Danielle's extroversary, so that's not fair. The only thing that's fair to do is to offer Kendrick and Danielle a second date paid for by this.
Hole.
Yeah okay, daniel that was the most appropriate response ever.
Kendrick wants more gift cards. I know Kendrick's up for it, all right, So Danielle, that's a no from you. Absolutely no.
You know what we never heard is whether or not his ex was excited about the gift cards.
Okay, Kendrick, how did the gift go.
So that part worked out?
This one work, Kendrick, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Oh man. Extaversary is a new term that I did not know about it.
We're concentrated on here.
Yeah, help years do you think it's going to take before Webster's.
Picks that up?
Yeah, they've got he in the dictionary. Extaversary needs a spot in those pages. How long does an activersary last? A lifetime or ten years?
Nobody's doing this. No one is picking that up.
Stan anniversary celebrators.
Yeah, I still can't believe he was baffled when she called him a lowlife and.
Put it together.
But she went through her things for a good reason.
For someone else, for ex love.
Yes, yes, it's a good reminder to reach out to an ex and tell them no hard feelings. And I have a Jamba Juice gift card. And if you also need some help with your dating life, we can step in and do that for you. Call that person who's not calling you back. By the way, you can go check out all of our second dates. Wherever you get your podcasts, on Apple, on Spotify, all of it at Brook and
Jeffrey, Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning,