Second Date Update Classic: Most Malone - podcast episode cover

Second Date Update Classic: Most Malone

Mar 30, 202416 min
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Episode description

One of our listeners has a closing move that was not only fun and flirtatious, it also comes with pizza. We guarantee guys are gonna try and steal this… and you can hear it in your Second Date podcast!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Speaker 1

Second date of date when someone tells you they went on the best date of their entire life.

Speaker 2

Oh, it's very exciting.

Speaker 1

But I could mean a lot of different things to different people.

Speaker 3

Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 2

Like for Brook, that's probably eating a corn dog in a porta potty after downing an entire bucket of sankria.

Speaker 3

Oh my god. Yeah, I'm not even with anyone myself there.

Speaker 2

For Jose, it would probably be staying at home one bowl of two spoons, playing Fortnite together while they take turns trash talking the preteens.

Speaker 3

Yea, yeah, and I'm sitting on her lap.

Speaker 1

But for one of our listeners, Zoe, she emailed saying she went on the best date of all time.

Speaker 4

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 3

So I'm so excited to talk to you.

Speaker 1

We're wanting to hear what this is.

Speaker 4

Welcome to the show, Zoe, Hi, thank you so much. I cannot wait to tell you about my day.

Speaker 1

It was so good.

Speaker 3

Listen to your voice. It had to have involved fuddel cake.

Speaker 1

Were you eating anything inside of a porta.

Speaker 5

No?

Speaker 4

But I went out with this guy named Miles okay, dating app and I just he looks like post Malone but like Buffer but with no tattoos.

Speaker 3

Okay, all right, that's a good look.

Speaker 1

We're having a hard time visualizing what I'm imagining.

Speaker 3

Like Toby Maguire, Now, I was excited for it. She's in that sing song voice anytime, you're just happy.

Speaker 4

He was so hot. If you saw him, you would understand it.

Speaker 1

Okay, hot, buff, post malone, no tattoos.

Speaker 4

Yeah, let's go exactly exactly. And so we, you know, texted back and forth. We hit it off online. So we decided to meet up for drinks.

Speaker 3

Right, Okay, were you this excited going into the date? Okay? And it sounds like you ride it on a high frequency already.

Speaker 1

Okay, so let's get into the date. How did that go?

Speaker 4

So we met up for drinks and he looked just like his picture, but even hotter.

Speaker 1

Okay, so he didn't take a post malone photo and photoshop it the way you want better. We're gonna call him most malone.

Speaker 4

That he was the perfect package. And so we're chatting and he's fun and creative, and then he like gets playful and he's like, you know what, let's play ice by And I'm like, what, okay.

Speaker 3

Wait, like the color game that I played with my kids.

Speaker 4

Well, you know, like, I fine, you say something. You see right, it's actually trees.

Speaker 1

The color gray assault shake. Yeah, how did romantic post Malone do it?

Speaker 4

Romantic Miles was he laid on the charm and he said, I by someone really cute.

Speaker 3

Oh you got jealous, and you were like your voice to it to just an optim that I think only dogs could hear.

Speaker 1

Just there.

Speaker 3

So he was talking about you, right, Well, I.

Speaker 4

Hope so, but I didn't want to be presemptuous, so you know, I said, is it the bartender? And then he was like no, And I'm like you, I'm like, is it me? And he's like like, oh, I mean yeah.

Speaker 2

You were not like turned off at all. The fact that it's a little bit cheesy.

Speaker 1

Maybe she are you?

Speaker 3

Are you listening to her?

Speaker 1

She's like, I can't believe it was me. I can't believe it took forty guesses to finally get there's no way. Okay, Well, if you liked it, that's great.

Speaker 5

I liked it.

Speaker 4

His charm worked for me.

Speaker 3

Okay, what happened next? It feels like you this is leading straight into a kiss.

Speaker 4

Well, we did get a little peck and then we decided, you know, what we should go. It's really late, and so I looked up Uber and they were like crazy expenses. Okay, I'm like, oh, maybe I could stay with him longer.

Speaker 2

Right, he didn't want He didn't want to pay for the expensive Uber the only.

Speaker 3

Person excited about search pricing.

Speaker 1

What do you do?

Speaker 4

Well, So once again he pulls out his creativity card and he's like, let's go to this pizza place I know up the street and then ask him if we order a large pizza, will the delivery driver take us home?

Speaker 1

That's so creative. Actually is I need to give him credit for that, but that is a good idea. They're going to drive your.

Speaker 3

House anyway, delivery driver be like next or twenty bucks, I'll take it.

Speaker 1

Ye did they do that?

Speaker 4

So we asked him and they said yes, Oh.

Speaker 2

You're gonna have to deliver forty other pizzas along the way.

Speaker 1

There.

Speaker 4

Luckily he did it. So the cool thing is we got to ride home and eat pizza and continue our conversation.

Speaker 3

With just like the pizza delivery guy sitting in the front seat.

Speaker 4

Yeah, it made his night interesting.

Speaker 1

True, So how did you guys leave it?

Speaker 4

Well? So he gave me a pet kiss because you know, we were kind of pizza covered and we both just slept on a high, or at least I did. And you know, we texted for a couple of days after that, and and then I haven't heard from him, and.

Speaker 1

Okay, weird.

Speaker 3

Do you know if he had like a really busy schedule or something.

Speaker 4

No, he didn't say that he did. And I'm just kind of worried that maybe he met somebody else on the dating app.

Speaker 1

Because he was such a catch, maybe he spied somebody even cuter.

Speaker 3

That's the backfire of the ice by game.

Speaker 1

Okay.

Speaker 4

I'm just hoping that you guys can call and see what's going on, because I don't want to this guy to get away, because he's like the perfect guy. It was like the best day.

Speaker 3

It sounds so fun, so fun.

Speaker 1

I'm honestly a little bit nervous to hear how excited he's going to be. If it's the same level of excitement, the speakers might explode each other. We'll find out, though, we'll come back. We'll call most Malone for you and try and get your second date update. Right after this second date update. If you're just joining us, we're talking to one of the least excited people ever had on this show.

Speaker 3

I see okay, boy down, yeah, real depresso.

Speaker 1

Yeah, Zoe is her name.

Speaker 3

Her name is even like.

Speaker 1

Zoey Zing. Her and guy named Miles met up for some drinks, played a pretty boring game of I Spy it sounded like, and then convinced the pizza place that if they bought a large pie they could ride home with the delivery guy in the back seat.

Speaker 3

So genius.

Speaker 1

I mean, look, I'll give her credit for a fun date, but her recap was just such low energy.

Speaker 3

Oh my god, and people are just tuning in again, just being.

Speaker 2

Wait, play the tape back and prove me wrong. Okay, okay, I'm just hoping. I'm hoping that Zoe can turn it up and not for this next part, shift out a neutral into first gear. Zoe, you need a coffee or something to perk up?

Speaker 4

No, no, no, I've had like four already. I'm good.

Speaker 3

Yeah, we can hear that maybe.

Speaker 1

You need four more or something.

Speaker 3

Yeah, Oh my god, I'm excited, you guys. This is member most Malone, the guy.

Speaker 1

Of at least one person is excited on this. I guess it's gonna have to be Brooke of us. Yeah, girl, I know to the depression. Yes, anyway, do.

Speaker 3

You one take we've never asked you is why do you think he's not calling back? Did you say that already?

Speaker 5

No?

Speaker 4

I don't know.

Speaker 5

I did you know?

Speaker 4

And that's why I've tried to like lay low and only text like twice a day. But you know, I'm not like over texting, but it's not helping.

Speaker 3

Wait are you texting twice a day without responses?

Speaker 5

Yeah? Is that bad?

Speaker 1

Yeah? Only twice. He's not gonna know. He's not gonna know that you're into If you're only texting him twice.

Speaker 3

A girl text me at least fifty times, Zoe. That's also sarcasm. Okay, yeah, that's not usually a good thing. Well, too late now, So yeah, it's awful if.

Speaker 2

It's like high and then later in the day it's like, okay, we'll hope you're having a good day.

Speaker 3

And then has it heard from him in over a week?

Speaker 1

That is like what you said two days. It doesn't matter textings for suckers anyway. So we're just gonna call him. Get it done, Zoe, Yes, okay, never gonna get it up. So let's just do it.

Speaker 5

Here we go, Hello, this is Miles.

Speaker 1

Oh.

Speaker 3

Hey, very formal.

Speaker 1

You are formal, Miles.

Speaker 3

What's up, Miles?

Speaker 5

What's up?

Speaker 1

We're a radio show called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.

Speaker 5

Okay, yeah, all right, what's up Brook and Jeffrey.

Speaker 1

Wow, you're very casual.

Speaker 3

Well, he's all the things, jeff He's all the things. That's why he's most malowne.

Speaker 1

Yeah, we've heard a lot about you, Miles. Actually from one of our listeners that you went on a date with recently named Zoe.

Speaker 5

From Zoe huh yeah, yeah, huh.

Speaker 2

We're doing something called a second date update, trying to help her figure out why the two of you haven't met up for another date.

Speaker 5

Are you serious?

Speaker 3

Yeah? Isn't that fun?

Speaker 5

Yeah? Yeah, all right, that's funk.

Speaker 1

He's also being sarcastic.

Speaker 5

We have to take it that way.

Speaker 1

Tell us about We want to know more about Zoe and what she thought of her.

Speaker 5

Yeah, Zoe, So all right, this is a girl we met online and it was we had a very good time. I had a very good time on the dabe O.

Speaker 3

Hey, she said it was a great date.

Speaker 5

It sounds like I'm sure she did. I'm sure she did.

Speaker 1

What she is depressing on your data as she was when we talked to her.

Speaker 5

Yeah, no, no, no, not very very fun loving girl, that's for sure.

Speaker 3

Really okay, I don't know.

Speaker 5

And look, I was having fun too. We were having a good time. I was feeling loose. She's someone you can joke around with and stuff. She was. She was a good time. We were having a good time.

Speaker 1

If you have all these positive things to say about her, and she made you feel all these good ways, and you could be loose in yourself, then why not meet up with her one more time?

Speaker 5

I guess she told you about our date. She told you about the pizza delivery guy. I have them drive us home.

Speaker 3

Yeah the heck you did to get a cheap ride home instead of uber?

Speaker 5

Yeah yeah, And she was so cool about that too. I'll say that, like, not every woman would necessarily be super cool about that.

Speaker 3

Not every woman would get in the car of a complete stranger.

Speaker 1

Well, there's pizza in the back of that car, so I feel like.

Speaker 5

Anyway. Anyway, So during the ride home, if we're going home, we were laughing, we were having good time, and she said to me, I'm just having such a good time with you. You're so much fun. You're so great. I don't want anyone else to have you. I don't want anyone else to match with you. I'm going to report you on the app so that you can't talk to anyone. Yeah, And like she said it as she was laughing, and I'm laughing too, and I'm like, yeah, yeah, no, I'll report you first.

Speaker 1

Uh huh yeah, right, okay, funny.

Speaker 5

Sure enough. A couple of days later, I get a notification that I got reported on the app.

Speaker 1

Are you sure it was her?

Speaker 5

I mean, I'm not one hundred percent sure that it was her, but I haven't met up with anybody else. I didn't see anybody else.

Speaker 1

And are you doing anything inappropriate that would get you reported?

Speaker 5

Bro? No, No, I'm not doing anything inappropriate.

Speaker 3

Wouldn't you ask her about it? Like she said, you guys were.

Speaker 5

Texting and she no, she was texting, And then that came through and she said she was going to do that, so I figured it was her. Okay, okay, Look, I was pretty piffed when that came through.

Speaker 3

I was going to ask, is that a turnoff?

Speaker 5

The major turnoff to have a company tell you your being if you've been a creep. It's very disturbing and kind of frightening and very no way, it's kind of flattering. Yeah, no, I didn't. I didn't take it that way. I didn't think it was a good idea. I don't think it's a fun dating hack even know what you know, who knows what she could have reported me for?

Speaker 3

Well, well, that's a great question.

Speaker 1

Here's a fun dating hack. We're going to put the two of you together on the phone right now and let you guys talked about it.

Speaker 2

Yay find out because she's been listening on the other line this whole time, one to talk to you.

Speaker 5

You know, Hello, Zoe, Hi, I would do that.

Speaker 4

That was not me.

Speaker 5

That wasn't you. Really, that wasn't you.

Speaker 4

I would never do that. Didn't you know how much I liked you and how much fun we who?

Speaker 5

No? I did. I definitely did. And I definitely remember you saying that you were going to report me, and then I got reported. Oh do you want to just admit that it was you?

Speaker 1

No?

Speaker 4

No, don't you remember I was joking and we were laughing about it, and you joked back about it.

Speaker 5

I know it was so funny.

Speaker 3

Zoe, be honest, did you do it? Did you report him.

Speaker 4

I did not do that. I mean, I like this guy. I want to keep him around in my life, not.

Speaker 5

Push him out of it.

Speaker 1

It was a kind of a long pause before you continued your sentence. I believe her, So, Zoe, there's zero percent chance that you hit the report button. Your finger didn't slip and accidentally.

Speaker 4

I mean, the only way that could have happened if maybe I was like blackout drunk one night and I don't remember that. Yeah, I mean seriously, if I did do that, which I don't remember doing it, it would only be because I like Miles so much and I want to see him again.

Speaker 1

Miles.

Speaker 2

And she told us that she was texting you about twice a day. Was there any evening where she sent you like sixty texts?

Speaker 3

That's a good way to judge, Jeff.

Speaker 1

Was there one night that was kind of weird?

Speaker 5

Yeah, I'm looking at him right now. She sent a lot of gifts of penguins being lonely.

Speaker 1

Oh, I don't know, only penguin.

Speaker 3

Okay, See I remember that, Zoe.

Speaker 5

Those are red flags.

Speaker 4

Yeah, what happened to your fun funny spirit that you've showed me the other ninety Miles?

Speaker 5

It went away with the dating app membership you blocked me from.

Speaker 2

Well now you don't even have any other options to date.

Speaker 1

That's good.

Speaker 3

We don't have that service on this show. It's only with Zoe.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I gotta say no, she's not even admittigan. I know it was you, Zoe. I know it would.

Speaker 3

You're never gonna get unblocked.

Speaker 5

Now.

Speaker 1

I'm going to block your phone number now from our radio station.

Speaker 5

I'm reporting, that's fine. Please block me. I do not want to hear from a radio station again.

Speaker 1

Oh this is backfired, meaning I'm going to myself now. Jeffrey in the Morning

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