Second Date Update Classic: Mistah Secure

Second date of date.

This happens every so often, but sometimes a listener will do a second date update with us that doesn't end with a yes.

Often, But the thing is.

They're so impressed by us, specifically me and my efforts to jumpstart their love lives, that they're willing to call back and give it another go.

You know, you don't have to.

Do Mountain's mouth anymore with CPR, but.

I like that.

Yeah, that's why Justin has reached out to us once again. He was on a few months back, and last time the lady he went out with was not impressed cause she showed up an hour late to dinner, but said Justin wasn't man enough to be mad about it and cancel what?

Oh?

I think?

I remember that it was.

Really weird and that call definitely crashed and burned, but we promised to try and do better for Justin this time.

So Justin, welcome back.

Hey, thank you guys for having me.

Oh man, how long did you wait for your date to show up this time? Justin?

No, she actually came right on time. That side he.

Test, and you failed it?

Sure you're to get up and leave and make her way?

Yeah?

I think that shows improvement, And I heard that you've been actually doing a little bit of research since the last time you were on with us.

Yeah, I feel like the learning process never really ends. I'm always trying to better myself, you know.

So deep.

So Justice, I heard about this book called Attached. Have you guys, are you familiar with it?

Attached?

I don't.

Reading is not on the top of the list of hobbies for this group, so but tell us about it.

What is attached about?

So this book basically talked about how most people come into three different psychological categories while dating. Okay, secure, where you can communicate openly and like I could be like, hey, I know you're busy, but I just kind of get nervous when you don't text back. Could you text me? Just let me know, even if it's just like a little thumbs up or something.

Oh, it's like the type of communicator you are, exactly.

In the story groups, they're secure.

Yeah. The other two categories are anxious and avoidant. Good and anxious people are like the super needy ones where it's just like, no, you gotta text me, and if you don't hear a text back, you're texting them like twenty times, like where are you? Where are you?

Pose registered for you?

Oh if I'm necessarily anxious in that sense, but in real life I'm anxious a lot.

Yeah. And then what's the other one? Again?

The last one is avoidant, where like if things start getting real, they'll push apart a little bit, like they want distance. They don't want to be smothered or anything.

Okay, can you be more than one? Like I feel like i'm the first two combined.

You have to read the book and find out.

Oh no, I'm just going to wait for the movie to come out.

Yeah, that was really like a fun movie, Jess.

Yeah, if they can, don't.

Make it really short because my attentions fan isn't great. Okay, So which which one are you justin?

So I'm secure with traits of anxious and so you can be more than one?

Okay?

Okay, So how did that change dating?

I'm just really open and communicative about what I'm expecting, how I feel. No more games of like like you know, with the girl who was late, I could just be like, hey you're late, that made me feel this way? What's going on? You know, just talk about it?

So we did we go on a dat or we just hearing about how your love life has improved.

For everybody in the or Justin wrote this book and he's trying to sell exactly. Yeah, so how does all this relate to your your new and improved dating life?

So I put this on my dating profile where I said secure attachment styles only, and it didn't really get me any clicks. But then I put that smiley emoji with like the sweat drop coming on the forehead, you know, and that got me.

So who matched with your secure people only demand?

With this wonderful woman named Kelly. She's an interior designer, absolutely very very secure, and I kind of wanted to have her see what I did. I don't even know if we spoke about this last time. I'm a professional rapper, Like at least part time did not come up, because, like, you know, unless you're super duper famous, people just presume your craps.

You invited CALLI to what watch You wrap somewhere?

Yeah, to a show that I was doing, and we hung out before we got to know each other, and then it was time for me to go on stage. And I had a couple of songs that night, so I did those. The crowd was really into it. Like I was a little nervous, you know, sometimes the crowd might not be into it. But yeah, but when I got off States, she said it was awesome, Like people were coming up to me, just like taking photos and

I mean, you're a rap artist unless you're Will Smith.

Rapper.

Yeah, she did say it was awesome, but I remember, like there's a point where I made eye contact with her while I was wrapping, and I noticed her eyes were kind of big where she was like I don't know if she thought this, but my read was like she's like, what the hell did he just say?

Can you give a subject material? Like I get to know anything?

Some of it gets political, some of it is just, you know, like.

Democrats secure up in the building.

Well, okay, got your openers for you the next show.

I wanted to stay a little longer and hang out more, but like while the people were taking photos, she was just like, I gotta go. It was so great being you. And then yeah, I had a tough time getting another date, and I really really did like her, you know, way more than the girl all who made me wait an hour.

Yeah, by this time you kind of made her wait. Yeah, same thing.

Well, we'll see what Calli has to say, because we're gonna drop some beats right here just for you, and then we're gonna come back and get your second date update right after this.

All right, sounds great, All right, hold on, man.

Date.

He's smart, he's sexy, and he's totally secure. I'm talking about our listener, Justin, who's back doing a second date update for the second time on our show because we failed him the first go round. Yeah, but this time Justin went out with a woman named Calli, who he described as also secure and right.

That's their attachment or whatever it is.

It's a good thing.

Yeah, and she got to see him in his elements, spitting mad bars at a rap show.

Weird part was while.

He was taking photos with fans after his performance, Calli suddenly ducked out, said.

She had to go.

Yeah, and we don't know why. I'm sure Brooke has some theories for why.

I don't know.

Maybe she just was sick of me. I mean it's a long time to go to a rap show and then to sit and all the fans coming out.

Yeah, your date like being on stage and not with you. You say you're by yourself and then you're by yourself.

More literally like as a comedy and greed and your date is just watching. Yeah, boring.

I didn't get that at all. I mean, I didn't want to be rude to the people who come up. You know, I'm not like a Kanye West or anything. They came to the show, I'm gonna take a second to say hello back.

No, we're not saying that that's bad.

It's just that, like on a first date, that may be. You know, it kind of just sucks from her perspective, you know.

But everyone else gets time with you with her.

Real stars don't take photos with their fans because they're past that. And maybe it came across as kind of needy.

That you need your fans to seem cool. He said he was secure, but maybe this whole time, maybe, Yeah, what's the other ones anxious?

I have? Tracea's anxiousness. I said that it is maybe.

The anxiousness turned her off. But we're going to call her and find out. Let's style. Callie's number and see what she has to say.

All right, here we go. Hello, Hey, is this Cali?

This is her secure account?

No, excuse me, my.

Name is Jeff. I heard that you were secure. Sorry, my name is Jeff from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.

There it is, all right?

Which radio show?

I don't don't about it.

We have a podcast too, Maybe you listen to that.

I don't think i've heard of you guys. What's just about?

Well, we do a segment on this show called Second Date Update, and we're trying to help one of our listeners get a hold of you because you went out with him the other night and now you're avoiding him.

His name is Justin. Oh, well, you guys went to a rap show.

Yeah, I remember him. How much do you guys know?

Well, we know that he is an up and coming rap star and he took you to his show.

But he said you left while you were doing a meet and greet.

Yeah I did so. I didn't really enjoy him very much. Oh No, the show is fine. He's actually a really talented rapper. Like I didn't mind the show at all. I thought he's pretty good.

You liked him on stage, but you didn't like him.

He's on stage persona.

Yeah, he lost me, I mean before the rap, like you were talking about before the show. Oh he guy just kept going on about the book, the attachment theory book.

Was it too much for you?

He just wouldn't let it go, Like and on a first date, the first time I'm ever talking to him, he's like psychoanalyzing me and like we're trying to figure it out for our personalities match. And I'm like, I couldn't find out if I click with you th for

It's like people who won't date like other horoscope science.

Yeah yeah, and you didn't feel like, I mean you were interested. You knew from the beginning that you weren't going to give him another shot.

Well I knew after about thirty minutes of him talking about this over and over that I was.

Bored thirty Oh oh, he went on for thirty minutes of that attachment theory.

We talked to him for like five minutes about it, and it felt like a lot.

I know, thirty minutes of that conversation.

I mean, at least he's passionate about it. Passion is a good quality to have about things.

But he wouldn't let it go. And it was like a tedious breakdown of the book, like all the categories who they match with, and you know, deciding that Okay, I'm secure and he's secure. I was like, okay, but only one of us is boring.

Yeah, that really hurts.

It got to hurt to hear. I don't know.

Maybe Justin's secure enough to take it in stride, because cal I need to tell you he's on the other line listening right now and wants to talk to you.

You had him on the whole time, Yeah he did.

Justin, Hey, Kelly, hearing how secure he sounds, you could.

I didn't want to be mean to you. I just you need to know that this strategy doesn't work, Like women aren't into that.

It's not a strategy. I just really like the book I read, and I thought you were enjoying the conversation, like the vibe that I was getting. You know, I'm sorry I misread the situation. I didn't know. Maybe it was because I was pre show Jitters or something and I missed the signs.

But I don't think you were reading that situation right at all. And it's just not a good strategy, Like it's date one. We're supposed to just talk about, you know, all the trivial things likes and dislikes with pizza toppings you eat when Netflix shows you're currently binge watching.

Like he's talking about his favorite book. You know, it's not fifty Shades of Gray, but at least it's like adjacent.

I'm sorry, I'm not basic. I don't want to go much and talk about like pizza toppings, Like do you know how many girls I go out with? Like I'm trying to find somebody who's special.

Hey, some people can talk about pizza toppings for very very much. That just came off a little hot.

Yeah, came off confident.

I think the first nats get so repetitive. I thought we connected on something deeper, you know, but it sounds like.

You were listening to her. It sounds like you were just like monologuing about a book that you read.

I thought she was into it, and I apologized. I didn't mean to be boring. I gotta be work for you, and it's not boring. Wow, I'm a dope rapper. I'm one of the best to ever do it.

Okay, okay's happening.

I remember you're taking pictures of fans, and that's Jeffrey proved.

You don't see Kanye taking a picture of anybody.

Let's just pretend that you didn't hear him call you the other bee work.

Wow.

Can you see how it was maybe a little bit your fault because you were encouraging him. He says that she seemed interested.

Yeah, that can definitely not be blamed on me, just because I didn't step in and say, hey, stop talking about this, now, you're boring me, like that would have been That would have.

Been very helpful clue to him that he needs to change the.

Subject, and he was really secure.

Would have been fine with him.

He's not the best at reading people, because it was very clear that I was bored. And you know, when you say to somebody like, oh cool, like four times in a row. Yeah, luckily you're not really there.

Luckily, I'm very good at reading people and reading situations and sensing a vibe right here.

I am.

I'm feeling the love connection happening, and that's why I'd like to offer to send Cali out on another date with Justin.

We'll pay for it.

I'm going to stop you right there. I thought this girl was secure. I'm getting so much avoidant and anxious vibes from her. I don't think I'm ready for a second to you.

I'm still sensing some vibes going on.

I don't want to just I not only there's something we agree on.

Ok yeah, I not only misread that conversation, I misread her entire profile and who she was as a human being. So yeah, hard Pass.

So I'm getting a sense this is more of just a hook up one night thing. Oh okay, she's not going to stay the night. She's just going to be in and out before the sun even comes up.

Hard Pass the name of his album.

That's a good album.

I'm just trying really hard because I don't want to go oh for two with Justin here.

Listen, you, guys, this is not your fault. I mean, I love you, guys, I love the show. I love that you like are taking the time to help me you're, oh for one, batting five hundred.

It's pretty good.

Hey, I don't think I'm calling it fifty to fifty.

We have definitely never gotten on basis it's.

In victory in my book. Congratulations Justin. He just got hit by a pitch.

Jeffrey in the morning,