Second Date Update Classic: Boat Fished

The second date update. You guys, feeling the warm breeze in your hair right now?

I'm not what I want to.

I mean, feel the sands stuck in your bikini bottoms, the wet splashes on your face of what I hope isn't contaminated lake water.

How are you making this dream?

And we're just going to get right to the second date today with one of our listeners, Alan, because he's one of the smart people, he took his date out to a place that was difficult to quickly escape from, out in the middle of the water. Isn't that right, Alan, I'm scared.

Yeah, that's absolutely correct.

Are you all trying to say you went boating? Is that what you're trying to say?

Yes, I did take my date on the lake.

Okay, okay? And what's your date's name?

Her name is Erica?

Okay, bombo, I'm bumble. I mean, how is your conversation?

It was great? Well, first of all, she's gorgeous, of course, and she's fun and she likes to have a good time. She's out doorsy, which is great because am I okay? All right?

Everything is matching up between you and Erica.

So we met up at the lake and we went kayaking.

Okay, that's fun.

So she shows up looking like a supermodel and her water higher, I mean, so hot.

It's such a fun date.

I love that you like planned and you you know, put some activities together.

You thought about what she liked. I mean, I bet she was.

Stoked, definitely, And I brought a couple of beers just to like relax, you know, because it's our first date. Yeah, we had a great conversation. We went on the kayak's the kayak for two, Okay, very romantic.

I don't know why. In my head I was picturing a kayak for two, like her sitting on top of his shoulders while they paddled like that sounds like a romantic type of activity, the fun type of kayaking. But do you feel like you were able to connect with her while you guys.

Are out there. We had great conversation, you know, I made a laugh, and you know, we were out there for about like an hour, and then her arms got tired, you know, so we went back again.

You just made her paddle the entire time, okay.

Like I was actually kind of happy, just because it was hot out and I was getting sumburned, so I didn't really mind. So then we took paddled to the shore. I mean, I'm sorry, we paddled to like, like, you know, we left the lake and.

Then okay, so.

Wherever the ground is, it's not a beach.

Okay, you found Alan.

I can tell just by your voice that you're sounding a little bit nervous right now, but it's okay. I mean you must have just really liked Erica a lot.

Yeah, I did. I really did like her, and I was hoping for like a second date.

How did you end it? I mean you said you paddled to the shore and then what.

So we paddled the shore and then I actually got stuck in my kayak, had drag the kayak and me out with who knows with her four star arms. That felt so bad out Yeah, like I was a dead fish. I can say.

That's not a sexy look to leave.

No, it was embarrassing at the start, but at the end we're like we both thought, had a really good laugh about it.

Okay, at least you were able to get on the same page. It's funny. I just I just picture her trying to put like canola oil all over your body, trying to like flip you out of your kayak hole.

It was actually olive oil.

You had some type of oil.

I always break some type of oil with me, good Man.

Actually, I can't tell you. I can't tell if Allan's joking or not.

You're joking, right, maybe, I don't know.

Yeah, So since that date happened, have you been keeping in touch with Erica? Like, how how's that been?

Well? I mean had texted her and no response, and then I went back on bumbball and I was trying to get hold of her but nothing. It's like dead silently. I don't think it was because she dragged me out. I was a person on baywatch.

Well, that's what I was going to ask. She had to pull you off physically. Was there any other physical contact? A hug, a high five, a kiss, anything. It'd be hard to do a hug with your so slippery with the oil slip right now.

No Cass, No Cassy, you know, because I was a gentleman. But we did get a hug. I couldn't get that close to her because my life jacket was bulky, but.

He kept the life jackets on for the hug.

The guy was actually pretty successful, even though it sounds like it might be an epic fail.

I feel like, yeah, maybe next time, like half hour of kayaking and then maybe go get food and a drink or something as well.

He brought two light beers with him I did.

I did a couple of like beers and a box of cheese. It's that we were like throwing at each other.

Nothing wrong with him box of soggy cheese.

Its you can't argue with that. So I don't know what's wrong with this girl, Erica. We're gonna call her and try and figure it out. We'll get to the bottom of it with your second date update, Next second date update. Oh I just I can't stop thinking about the awkward life vest Hug farms sick and the sound of wet cloth, plastic rubbish together. It's just a lot of squeaking, but two dolphins trying to French kiss. I mean, not the most romantic ending that we've ever heard on

I see what you did there.

Yeah, let's stop, Alan, How you doing man good?

You know, I was actually just thinking maybe when she pulled me up on shore, I might have looked less badly and I'm pretty badly.

So I'm pulling a guy in a life fest out of the kayak.

Doesn't sounds like Okay, come on, buddy, let's get you out of the kayak.

Nothing screams testosterone to me like being pulled out of a kayaki.

Yeah, it just sucks that that was like your last impression too. I mean, I know that you guys got to laugh about it, and that's cool, but like that.

I just checked my bumbo account and I can't find her. I think she blocked me or she just follow me.

Okay, well, we're just gonna really look forward to this.

Call from us.

Yeah, let's not speculate anymore. We're just gonna call Erica and see what she has to say. We'll ask her exactly how manly you were. Okay, all right, okay, okay, I'm gonna die her number right now. We'll see what you just say. Let's do. Hello, Hey is this Erica. It is hey Erica. My name is Jeff from the radio show Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. How are you doing?

Uh, I'm good, I'm sorry. Where are you from.

We're from a radio show. It's called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning on every morning.

Yep.

You can also get us on podcast on Spotify if you want to look us up there.

Oh okay, I'm what?

I sorry?

What do you want?

We want to ask you a little bit about a date that you went on recently with one of our listeners. Help our friend. Yeah, somebody do call a second date update? Do you remember going out recently with a guy named Alan?

Oh?

Alan, Alan's a liar.

That guy is the biggest liar.

What he's whoa you mean the manly man that you pulled out of the coin.

We didn't need to do that. Oh my god, that is such a I'm sorry.

I don't mean to interrupt Erica, but that is not what I think any of us expected. Like, we talked to Alan, and he was I didn't see liar written all over him, But I don't.

Think he could get away with a lot and humble, wholesome, humble hunk is how we yeah, how we read it.

Oh, so then he continues to lie to you guys, too, and he's totally fooled you that.

What is he like some player or something like? What are you saying?

No, I wouldn't go okay, what was your take? Okay?

Well, so on his profile, like he talked about, you know, his boat, how he's on his boat all the time.

Ye.

So like when we.

Started talking, he invited me out on his boat, okay, not a dumb kayak, which everyone.

I would go on a boat and I wouldn't want to kayak.

Wait, you thought he meant boat boat not man powered boat.

Yeah, of course, like a boat with a boater.

I mean, but why does that matter?

Like he's cute, right, why does it matter? For every reason possible? First of all, his picture is the way he like has them frame. It looks like he's on the water, but he kind of cuts out like I don't know the kayak part.

Oh okay, So you were expecting to be out on some like yacht.

Yeah I don't know.

I mean one where I don't have to paddle? Yeah?

Yeah, But I mean, were you able to get past that initial shock? Like he said, he brought some beers and you guys had a good time.

I didn't even be completely rude and like we're out there anyway. So I was like, okay, I'll get on this, like, we'll do it. And we're out there for like an hour and my arm there on fire. I didn't expect to be doing more workout this day. And finally we get back to the shore and he gets stuck.

Yeah. Yeah, he told us that part of the story. And I don't want to sound super judgmental here, but doesn't it seem a little bit superficial. No, that's the only thing that you're interested in. No, No, I'm saying.

You, Okay, I'm planning to have a fun summer, like not on a kayak.

You can work on a kayak, trust me, but you can pull it off.

Yeah, and you know it's like kayak was a no go.

Right from the beginning.

Yeah, of course.

Why wouldn't you just tell him that?

I don't know. He seemed very excited about the whole thing. I didn't want to like bursts his whole bubble, And I was like, look again, I mean then I don't have to work out later, So it just was fine.

Fortunately you didn't burst his bubble then, but you burst it now because he's on the other line listening wait what, Yeah, Alan's been there the whole time, wants to talk to you.

Are you saying you're not going to want to do with me because my kayak is not a boat technically, if we look up in the dictionary, a kayak is technically a boat.

Okay, Alan, have you been listening? She doesn't want the kayak.

I know, but I'm just saying technical terms. I wasn't lying kayak is considered a boat.

Is this the first time we've ever done a second date where somebody got boat fished?

I did get boat fish?

I want I don't know what we're talking about semantics. I want a guy with a boat like I don't want like a kid at.

The flash slash Erica. I just bought a boat, A twenty foot foot boat. Can call our thirty?

Did you just make up a bunch of words and then put boat at the beginning.

Of wait, you said it's the way it's at twenty You said it's a twenty four foot Bennington bolts are thirty boat.

Okay, is a half boat, half horse.

So I don't know the name, but I do know what it's twenty four feet. I bought it online. It's used, I said, caught a Beddington called Bault.

No, you don't. You don't have to keep pronouncing it makes me?

Are you serious, Alan, or were you just google searching boats for sale while you were listening to Erica?

I got one. The listing is pending, and I think that will be the highest bidder.

Oh, Erica, So he seemed to be boat owner.

As long as the bidding goes through the eBay sale.

Erica, picture picture yourself sitting on a Bennington Cult boat full. Yeah, thirty, doesn't that sound that is a big difference.

No, the mono number is an R thirty, not the size. You guys don't know anything about boat.

Excuse me, I forgot we were talking to the boat experts. Yeah, but Erica, I mean anything. You said that you only want to date a guy with a boat, and it sounds like he's about to own one.

Look first of all, like I know a little bit about boats, and I actually those those are real. That's a real boat.

Yeah. I just googled it and it says that boat gets all the hot chicks.

Oh, I didn't know they put that in the boat description.

It's a good selling.

Point, Erica.

It sounds to me like this is kind of a match. You know, you're you're looking for any man who owns a boat, and he is a man who owns technically two boats stringing together. Next thing, you know, you got a party in the back.

I mean, I say, if Erica doesn't say yes, I think a lexus.

Yeah, two choices, Erica has two choices. You can date a hero like me or a zero like the bumbo other people because they don't have a boat and I do it.

Okay, what do you say, Erica? You want to go out with the hero because we'll pay for it.

Look, I'm not just saying this because we were like out on the water. But this whole thing sounds fishy.

Boat puns.

Yeah, you don't believe them. Huh.

It sounds like while we were talking, he just jumped on eBay and put a bid on a boat.

But but how I got the boat? I'm getting one.

Yeah, he's a man who sees what you want and he gets it for you.

Try to deliver.

That's the type of person that you want to end up dating, a man that can get stuck in two boats.

Honestly, I can't wait to see him try to back that down.

But Erica, we need an answer. What do you say, will you give Alan one more chance?

I mean, if you throw in some like SPF fifty for Alan, I'm interested. I'm not promising i'll go on it, but I'll see it.

Salesman.

Congratulations on we got a woman within viewing sight of your It.

Took a lot of the effort and time. I thank you guys, but I think we got it yet, that.

It was.

Right now.

Yet, Okay, good for you, Brook. Jeffrey in the morning,