Brooke Breaks You Up: Drop the Stanford Dropout

Well, we've got a new episode for you today. It's Brock and Jeffrey in the Morning. Oh God, our favorite segment and Brooks least favorite segment.

Yes, yes, love it breaks you.

Up when I help someone break up. And here's the thing, I don't think I've ever been as uncomfortable as I was today on this show.

It was weird. I like I I listen, Yeah, you'll hear it.

Yeah.

And Brooke doesn't want you to.

Will And we'll have a video coming up soon as well. How read her face gat Yeah on our YouTube page. So follow us on YouTube at Brook and Jeffrey. Yeah, we're just gonna skip comments to get right to it. It's like ripping a fan. I can't handle it right now, play the episode.

Only. Special segments on this show get the jeff Debo Gold Seal of Approval, and this one definitely gets my gold Star are because it's a fan favorite. Brook breaks you up. Everybody loves it, nobody more than Brook.

Yeah except for the people I'm dumping.

Who should be dumping today, a selfish billionaire CEO, a paraplegic with a wandering eyes, or somewhere in between, whoever it is. Brook is ready to cut him loose in the special, delicate yet brutally heartless way that only she

Because it's not that bad.

That's why it's so good. And of course, when you need to blindside your significant other by dumping those which is why we created this segment called Brooke Breaks you.

Uh, it's not mentally there today to do this.

Well, this is the uplifting thing that you need, because nothing brings Brook joy like shocking people by cutting them loose with no warning. Whether it's the child workers at one of her offshore factories or bad boyfriends who aren't pulling their weight. Which one is it gonna be today? Brooke can't wait for either one.

Jeff knows me so well.

Let's talk to our listener, Ashley, who's requested Brook services today. Ashley, Welcome to the show.

Hello, Hey, Hi, Ashley. It's just always like, why can't you do this on your own? Ashley, Like, why do you need me to do it?

That's a good question, Ashley. Tell us about the guy that you've been dating for a while, and what brought you to this decision today. What's his name?

Brian?

We haven't been dating that long.

Well, that makes this easier, I'll tell you that.

Yeah, what's not that long? Four years?

No, just like I a four months.

Yeah, yeah, at the end of the world. So we met at a party.

It was my friend's party, and I wasn't like really that interested, and he just kind of like kept pursuing me, like I would run into him, like at the gym, and he thought with some of my friends at one time, and like we exchanged numbers and he was texting me, and I really like loved the attention he gave me.

Oh there's there's some honesty right there.

Oh yeah.

It wasn't that he like won you over with his charm. It's that he just didn't give up.

Yeah, exactly, he didn't give up.

Okay, but he was charming.

But he's very charming as well.

But not charming enough to give in right away.

Yeah, I'm with you. It is really interesting. If he was so charismatic, why didn't you like him in the beginning.

I just like, I haven't been single for that long though, so I didn't want to have it be a rebound.

I so you weren't ready for relationship and that's why you were Yeah.

I was trying to just be smart and go slow, and I had a bad breakup before, and it was just yeah, I just didn't want to like jump right back in.

But I'm glad I didn't have to do the bad breakup, yeah, said.

So eventually you did give in and said yes to going out with him. What was the relationship like?

So I said, yeah, I was like, okay, this is great. And then it was kind of a weird date. We went to the horse chalk.

Oh, that's kind of fun.

The horse chuck?

Is that a track.

Horse chock?

Yeah?

He was betting on horses and he like did this research on these horses and was like trying to impress me and like look at the money I won.

And did that work for you? Obviously?

No, Okay, he was more interested in the actual race horses.

I just don't understand if you didn't have a great time on your first date, then you continued to date him for three to four months. Is that what we're hearing?

Yeah, I just got to know different things about him as we start and dating more, Like the whole horse track.

Thing was weird.

And I know that he likes to gamble a little bit.

Totally fine, Yeah, as long as it's a healthy amount exactly.

But he brags a lot, Like he apparently went to Stanford and he brags about it, but he didn't actually graduate, but he went still.

Getting accepted to Stanford. That's like.

He went to Stanford, Connecticut.

He didn't.

He went to a community college in Stanford, Connecticut. He didn't go to the Camford.

Omford with an M with an.

Is that what you're saying, is Stanford? You thought it was the Ivy League college and it turned out that a college, which is fine.

The way he presented it to me was an Ivy League school.

Okay, you stay with him for four months, you don't sound into.

Him at all. Memory yet, Like I guess we're getting right to the point of why.

But about him, he did give.

Me lots of it tension, and I love that. But then I realized another thing. I would hear him on the phone with his mom and he was really short with her and just kind of rude. And that's a sign. If a guy is rude to his mom, they're going to be rude to you eventually.

Okay, Well sometimes sometimes moms started with their son and you just can't you can't read into that one too much. I agree, it's agree it's not a good look, but there could be a reason behind it. Then he got me.

He got me flowers like I was going to break up with him, and I think he could tell, and so he got me flowers from the discount rapped. Now they're like four days old and they have a little discount setting on him.

It's kind of like the day old pastries.

Oh yeah, okay, And.

I totally don't mind. But it's like, why would you not take off the sticker?

Right?

Yeah, there's so many red flags.

Okay, So yes, we've gone on a long time, Brooke, You've heard a lot of the negative things about this guy. Do you feel like you have enough to go off of, Yeah, to dump him, to cut him loose.

I mean, I think you can.

Let's call him right now. I thought you said you were ready.

Sure, but usually I just get a little bit of more time. Well, let's call him, you know, let's call him. I'm ready this bandit.

Well, look, we're out of time. Your hesitation there. We were going to make that call, but I guess we have to go to break for a second, and then when we when we come back, we will dump this Stamford non graduate horse race, betting, rude to his mother but maybe justified all the terrible things, and make him your ex boyfriend when Brooke breaks you up. You ready for this, Ashley?

Yeah, you can't be sad.

She sounds like she misses him already. She's nervous.

No, this is gonna be one of those where you like change your mind at the end, Isn't it like, don't do that. We're going to do this. You need to admit to me. Are you listening? You need to commit to me that were breaking up with him?

Okay, all right, all right, bring that same fire when you come back and give it to the guy with Brooke breaks you up. Right after this, we're in the middle of Brook breaks you up, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning, and we've got a laundry list of reasons why our listener, Ashley does not want to date this guy Brian anymore. So let me just run down the list real quick. Apparently he buys her discount flowers while leaving the discounted sticker.

On I think it was her over the edge on.

Yeah, it was a really nasty part. He's short with his mother over the phone, bragged about going to Stamford when it turns out it was just a community college in Stamford, Connecticut, totally different place, and he didn't even graduate. And he loves to gamble and talk about gambling and always wants Ashley around to witness him gambling. So those were just a few of the ones that we had

I have?

And I think what we do is we convince him that he wants to dump you. I mean, if you think about it, this guy's super insecure, like he's bragging about an Ivy League school that he didn't go to. You know, he's like trying to show off winnings from gambling. Like that's yeah, come on, man, but it comes from a place of insecurity. So we'll build him up and show him that maybe he's better than you. Ashley.

Oh oh, I'm justity.

No, I don't even need that. I don't even need that.

What do you think about that strategy? Ashley?

I mean, I feel like, what kind of gaslighting? But that's okay.

But it's gas lighting for a good reason, because at the end of the day, our goal is to have you broken up with this.

It's better for him to.

Yeah, even if Brook has to tear you down in order for that to work, it light.

I think I just lift him up so high.

Yeah, yeah, I can't wait to see this. Yeah, Ashley, are you ready?

Yeah?

Remember you promised Brook?

Yes? Yeah?

Yeah, yeah yeah.

Yeah. Let's build up Brian to tear him down. Brook is about to break you up.

Here we go. I have one more question, I forget. Do you tell him why we're on the phone or am I just talking to him? We don't.

This is just you, This is Brooke breaks you up.

Well, I know, but like you know what, there are other stuff. We're all here, so this isn't I'm gonna let him know that you visit.

This is Brook smacks you down. So here we go. I'm gonna dob Brian right now. Ashley, just make sure you stay quiet in the background until Brooke does the deed.

Here you go.

Hello, Hey, is this Brian?

Yeah? Is this?

Oh well, Brian, you are a lucky man today. Uh this is Brooke. Yeah, this is uh well, you know, lifting them up. This is Brooke from Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. We're a radio show and Morning. Yes, we have had quite a great time talking about you.

Oh okay, one of my friends put you up to this.

Yeah I like that.

Yeah yeah, yeah, Well we'll get to that.

In a second.

What did you say your name was?

I'm Brooke again, I'm Brooke. Hi.

What's your last name?

It's Fox Brook Fox.

Box all right.

Yeah, I'm not taking questions from you, Jose. Okay, so listen, Brian. Are you curious about what we've heard about you?

I'm more curious what you look like. I'm looking you up right now.

Okay, that felt weird.

Just gonna let you know Brook from Brook and Jeffrey in the morning if you need to search that.

Brian, Well, nice, are you the Are you the one with glasses? He's like the kind of like little gnome one.

This will be the little gnome of glasses.

Call her a little pixie or something like, Wow, I've got the glasses, Brian.

Now they're both. They're both cute. I just want to know which one you.

Okay, Brian, we are getting off topic. This is about you. It's not about me.

Brook. She's blushing a little.

I don't know what to do with this guy.

I get what she needed.

Help.

Why do they get stuck on the radio. You should be on camera?

Okay, wow, we do have some cameras.

In here anyway talking about me?

Oh sorry, we don't want to ruin the chemistry that's happening on going.

There's no chemistry. I am a married woman, Brian. This is not about me. We have heard that you're very charming. Oh yeah, and we heard that you're pretty fun to hang out with.

You should try it sometimes.

Right, I am not calling to hang out with you. Can you're the chemistry I know, but that is not good that you're even saying this because I also you one.

Night in Vegas, We're gonna have a time of our lives.

Okay, that is rude, rude and not appropriate.

Yeah, she needs a check her schedule first.

Hold on, no, no, no, no, this is not happening.

But it is fun. Okay, so well it's not going well at all.

Letting Brook at any track, Brian, Brian, have you ever heard of a relationship where maybe you're really into that person and you're giving them lots of attention and you're making them feel really good, but then they're.

Not really appreciating it very much of what.

Brook's doing to you right now.

Yeah, like they just are kind of like taking it, taking it, taking and not giving.

Should I be honest with you, Brook, Fox, I was not listening to anything, he said.

Oh, he's just keeps getting lower. It's workings.

Listen, Brian, you can't talk to other women like this because right now you're in a relationship. And we know that because we actually talk to the woman you're dating.

Because I know she's been complimented like this in years, faring her face right now, look at the cameras.

Actually, Okay, wait, are you a friend of Ashley?

Yes?

Yes, and I'm calling to tell you it's not going to work out with you and Ashley. Yes, so you are you okay?

Yeah? I mean you want to offer a shoulder to cry on?

Are you taking this seriously? Listen to what you're saying, Brian.

I am calling because Ashley asked me to call. We do a segment on our show called Brooke breaks you Up when somebody needs help, because you are a very persuasive man, as you know, Thank you, and so she wanted to set a hard boundary that it's probably not it's not probably, it's definitely not a good idea that you guys see each other any longer. So are you hearing me?

Yeah? No, that's that's tough, that's not I know.

Sure, Okay, here's the thing. Here's the thing. The thing I feel like you should take from this is that we also heard that you're not very nice to your mom, just like for his mom's sake. I mean, you may not realize it because I'm sure you love your mother.

So okay, no, no, no, this is this is Brook breaks you up, not Brook repairs your familiar p therapy.

That maybe you're a little short with her when you talk to her and it could hurt her feelings. Just think about it.

I love my mom and I know she's gonna love you, So why don't we set something up?

Wow?

Okay, okay, that's the end. Can we just bring Ashley in?

We probably, yeah, we probably need to tell you this, Brian. But Ashley, your girlfriend now ex girlfriend, has been on the line during this entire time listening.

Hi.

Oh you're on right now?

Yeah, so she heard all that.

That was really nice. Uh yeah, you're you're quite the charmer over there.

Okay, well, maybe we talk about that off line.

No, you don't seem sad at all. You don't seem unhappy at all. I'm just really happy that I made this decision.

Okay, Well, I love making you happy.

That's pretty smooth.

Oh my god, that's ridiculous. That's a ridiculous thing to say. And sorry, Brooke is married.

So we were alone.

The nonnome looking one.

Ridiculous. I can't even believe this.

But I'm really really, like I said, really really happy that I did this. I was nervous and I was like, am I gonna be regretful?

Okay? No, actually, remember remember you're the one breaking up. You don't have to be upset.

No, no, no, it's Brook breaks you up. So Brooke is the one who comes out on top today.

So every everybody's leaving this situation happier, happy, and where they should be.

Yes, that's what everybody wants is a happy ending from this second.

So that yeah, I mean, yeah, yeah, I mean I just I just sort of we don't have to hang up though, right, like, yeah.

Yes we have to hang up. We're never going to talk again.

All right, you can hang up, but I've still got this picture on my phone, so.

That let's not do that. Come here, handle so I can block you.

Brook and Jeffrey in the morning, texting to seventy five nine, who says, Brook, you and Brian actually sounded like a good match. He had you smiling.

So uncomfortable for me.

I never blush like that.

I don't like that. I don't like attention like that. It just makes me uncomfi.

The video we did it's all on video, and Brooke is I don't know what emotions she's feeling, but.

I hate it now, even when you're just saying don't look at me.

Another text came in that says, which one is the gnome? I'm looking at the pictures and I can't figure it out.

The three of you.

Edit it?

Can he edit me into a home thing?

But at the end of the day, it was successful edition of Brooke Breaks You Up. Ashley and Brian are no more.

Well for the best for now.

Yeah, we might be doing this all over again.

I've never heard a guy so casually invite someone out to Vegas with him while bating.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure Ashley is probably not the only girlfriend.

He's cheated on her so many times. At sound almost impressed. Well, Brian's got options. It sounds like gnomes fly free on h I do, and you can apply free on our website. Or if you ever need help with your personal life, if you want Brooke to break you will, don't ask me, or just with an awkward situation, email the show and we can try to help you out. Go find our podcast wherever you get yours at Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.