We've all lied to our parents before. Sometimes you have to. Yeah, like, no, Mom, the chicken wasn't too dry. Yeah, I love the electric nose hair tremmer for my birthday. I'm so glad you gave me that instead of a car.
Yeah.
I never even wanted to be cool anyway. But some lies are bigger than others. And one of our listeners today needs our help for that exact reason, because she's worried that her brother has been hiding something from her entire family for over two years. It's a big secret, and I can promise you this, it might lead to a huge family blowout if we don't step in right now.
Oh, I love family secrets. Let's step in.
We're gonna do it. Your awkward Tuesday phone call. Next, it's awkward.
It's Tuesday.
It's awkward Tuesday phone call. I've told you guys countless times about how awkward it is to hang out with my family. Yeah, hearing about it's one thing. Living it is a different experience because just this past weekend, my father angrily did dishes for a half hour. Why because nobody else was doing them at the time, so he was getting his hands wet cursing while violently shoving plates into the dishwasher, screaming about how he doesn't want to get food poisoning again.
All right, checks out.
So there just a normal family gathering for the debos, and one of our listeners, Lauren, is having your own issues with an upcoming family get together, apparently regarding her brother, Lauren, do you think maybe your brother wants to hang out and do dishes with my dad because it might actually solve both of our problems? Yeah?
I would love that, Okay, I mean, Jeff says that, but you know, he was in the other room being like, I know he's mad, but I really don't want to do him.
Yeah, he's like dad came down watching the music.
Don't judge me enough about my dad and his dishes. Anger. What about your brother? What's going on with them?
Oh?
Okay, So it's rather bizarre because my brother has been in a relationship with a girl for about two years now.
Okay, so they've been together for a while.
Yeah they have, They have two years. Especially for my brother, two years is a while because he's always been a super career oriented focused guy.
You know, I thought for sure that was not going to be followed by a compliment, and it was, well, you.
Thought he's gonna use a big loser?
Yeah, exactly, he's my brother and who'd want to be with him?
Okay, sister, Some people are like that though they don't get into a lot of relationships. Yeah, like me.
Right, yeah.
But the issue was that it's been two years and we've never met her.
What oh oh that sketch. That's a long time you've never met her.
Well, he's super secretive about her and like he won't tell us or show us photos, like he's showing me a couple of polaroids. Polaroid, I mean polaroids. I know he's he's vintage. What I think you can put him from your phone now?
Oh?
Yeah?
Right?
Do they live in another country or something?
Is that? What?
Like, I just they can't be close to you then, right, we.
Don't live super close. No, But whenever the opportunity for us to meet her comes up, all of a sudden, you either busy or sick, or something's come up, and it's you know, it's just getting super weird.
What do you think is happening in this situation? Do you think he's just ashamed of you and your family?
Oh, I thought it was the girlfriend.
That's where I went. That's that's why I didn't introduce anybody.
Yeah, I think there's always this pressure from my parents. So when are you going to settle down? You know, when are you going to get married and have a family. And part of me thinks he may have made her up just to get them off his back.
Oh she's real.
Oh, there's a realty.
Oh.
I had one of those girlfriends for years and that was kind of nice.
Yeah.
I'm just someone that you make up just to get your parents off your back.
Girl for fifteen years and thousand and third grade.
I told you, Sarah's just very shy.
Okay, okay, that would be one thing to make it up for your parents because they're putting pressure on you. But he would lie to you as well. You think you're his own sister about a girlfriend.
Yeah, I think that's.
Where you should be cool.
He might be embarrassed, you know, and I just want to let him know that if that's the case, he doesn't have to make someone up like he can be honest.
So we're just going to publicly call him out. I like it.
Yeah, I am confused. What is it that you want to do with your call here. You want to call your brother and.
Say what, I don't know what to say. That's why I'm calling you. Like, the big issue is that I have to do it this way because my parents said that they are going to confront him about it. Yes, I want to get to him and get the answers before they You.
Know, it's like a whole family discussion behind his back that everyone thinks his girlfriend's fake.
And I would say that.
Now after two years, You're like, okay.
Yeah, single time every years.
It does kind of geta Are you sure you don't want that to happen, just for like the good video that you could post.
No, I'm trying to save him before things get really ugly because there could be a huge fallout.
I didn't think about that. Maybe she is really ugly. You could be right about that. Is that what she's saying. I thought I heard her say she could be really ugly.
No, things could get really ugly and there could be a fallout.
Oh okay, but it still is a decent theory, right, Okay, that could be it. We'll find out, We're going to play a song, we'll come back, and we'll give you one.
Sorry.
Yeah, we're gonna play a song. We'll come back and we'll give you some advice and let you make your awkward Tuesday phone call to your brother to find out if his girlfriend is real or made up. We're gonna do it right after this.
All right, thank you?
All right?
Hold on, it's awkward.
It's Tuesday.
It's awkward Tuesday phone call. Today. We're on a mission, a mission to track down the invisible girlfriend. Is she real? We don't know. This is what we have. We have no social media posts of the two of them together, no family meetups, and two blurry polaroid photos that have been seen at a brother sister get together, along with a million excuses for why she can't ever meet the fan.
Oh my god, maybe she's bigfoot photos.
But here's my question. If she's invisible, how do we know she's not on the phone with us right now? Dana, are you here? Blink twice? If you're here, I'm not here hearing the blinks.
I prefer that.
But no, this is a real situation. We're not joking around. It's been two years and one of our listeners, Lauren, says she has still not met her brother's girlfriend and it's becoming a little bit of an issue in their family, so she's looking to get ahead of this before her parents get involved. What's your advice for Lauren before we call her brother.
Listen, the quickest way to bond with your sibling is to have a common enemy, and we all know that enemy is always your parents.
I'm right, okay.
So listen, you need to go to him and be like, oh my god, you are not going to believe what mom and dad are saying behind your back, and I don't even know how to respond. Under the bus, Yeah, no, yes, throw parents under the bus and.
Then hopefully he'll come clean and be honest with you.
Lauren, you liking that.
I do like that strategy. I do divide and conquered, divide parents.
So throw the parents under the bus. That's option one. Jose, what do you think?
I really like what you said towards the end of our last phone call, which was you are trying to save him, so so he knows like, Hey, I'm not just being a boss the older sister here. I'm truly trying to help, and I think that he'll matter.
Really, you don't care if he doesn't have a girlfriend, right, regardless.
Right, you're the hero here. In fact, call yourself a hero when you talk to me. You're gonna save his relationship with mom and dad. Are you ready to do this?
That's all I want for Christmas.
Okay, that's sweet. Here we go, family war, family division. All right, I'm gonna dial your brother's phone number. We're going to back away and let you talk to him, but we'll jump in when we feel like you need a little help.
Okay, okay, sounds good.
All right, here we go.
Hello, Hello, Jake, Lauren.
Yes, how are you?
I'm good. I didn't know what you call in. Your name didn't pop up.
Oh, I'm sorry about that. You know, sometimes gotta make it a surprise, right, got switch things up?
Yeah? What do you mean?
Well, I don't know.
Listen, listen.
So the holidays are right around the.
Corner, right, yeah, yeah, Mom and dad are really excited to get together as always, and they keep after me if we're gonna get to me Kana.
Uh, Well, I don't know. I mean, she's got a lot on our plate right now. So I'm I'm not sure if you'll have time.
I mean, maybe you're joking, right, What do you mean he's not gonna have time. It's yeah, it's been over two years now, Jake, we haven't met her.
Well yeah, I mean, I'm sorry, but timing's been off. Just hasn't been the right time.
I mean, Jake, timing's always been off. It's just is there something else going on?
I don't know what to tell you. I mean, she's just not ready, is it?
Dad?
Cream cheese and rantam because trust to me, I get it.
No, there's nothing to do with that. Okay.
Well, I'm your big sister, and mom and dad have been talking about this to me and I hate that. It's not good.
Well, so what I mean, it's not their business. I mean they can talk about it, it's not to me.
They think you're hiding something, Jake. And to be honest at this point, I kind of do too. Oh come on, Jake, just be honest. Okay, that she exists?
Is she real?
Is they not a real person? Because it's okay if she's not, like I guess the pressure I was there too before. I'm at Cooper.
Listen, she's real. I've already told you that. And honestly, that's crazy that you think I'm lying about it. It's kind of why what am.
I supposed to think? What am I supposed to think? There's no social media posts. I come over to your house and there's a few blurry polaroids.
You know.
It's it's just it's it's weird.
Look, I mean, I get it, but I can't do anything about it. She's not ready. We're not ready. It's just not the time.
What do you mean, We're not ready? Not ready for what? It's been two years?
Fine, we're not ready because Dana is her real name?
What are you talking about.
The real name is Claire and you know her.
What are you talking about right now? I don't I don't understand.
It's it's our stepsister. Okay? What that?
Oh my god?
Jake?
Hey what hey man? You're need a second over here?
My name is jeffreaking out.
Oh my god, Jake.
You're on a radio show right now. What don't worry. Not a lot of people listen to us, just a few million. But it is interesting to hear this. We we know a lot about some of your story from your sister.
Are you serious? It's Claire?
Okay? Please tell me.
It's like an adult stepsister, like you didn't grow up together?
Did you grow up together?
Yeah, we were like thirteen.
Okay, you're basically adults teenagers. Yeah, well, in the Jewish tradition, thirteen is adults. And I don't know what your religion is, but since you celebrate Christmas, it's probably not your stepsister, Lauren.
Lauren, I knew you'd react like this. This is why I don't tell you guys stuff. I mean, everyone is dutchmental.
This really does make a lot of sense.
That's not normal, Jake, that's not normal.
Why not? It's not like we're blood related. It's fine.
Happened?
Did this happen at at like another family holiday event?
Like?
Do you know what I'm saying?
Brook wants to take notes so she can make it happen for the organize it.
It happened way after our teenage years. I never thought this would happen. I just I don't know. We ended up hanging out and the notes and started falling for each other. I like her. I don't know. I don't care that point.
So wait, when we're.
Talking about your mom and dad, is it your mom and stepdad that we're talking like? Oh my, there's like a lot of family dynamics here.
Yeah, we can have at least acknowledge there's no blood relation.
Yeah, with her in high school. I lived with her in high school. You can't hate her.
Well, it's great, so that way, you've already met That was what the whole problem was. He said that you never met her so you know her.
Well, yeah, you should be happy because you have already met her and she's great.
Isn't she already at your family holiday stuff? You guys just aren't acting like a couple.
During it, Like, what is exactly? I mean, that's why I haven't made a big announce that she's already there.
So what do you do?
You have to wait until you guys get engaged to tell us break up?
What exactly was the plan here, Jake? Like when were you going to come forward and say what your relationship was?
I mean, this is the issue. I mean I get it, Like I know that it's maybe not the most normal thing, you know, to be attracted to your stepsister, but I just know I can't. I can't ignore my feelings with me, can she?
I Mean?
Look, we are a show that's all about love, right Brooke. Love is love and you have to.
Support this it But like the shock and if you were going to pull the band aid off. It would have helped, like two years ago. Now you have created all of this for two years.
They're going to be upset that he didn't say anything before.
And they're both they're both in the same room while people are asking him about girlfriends.
Okay, be honest, you guys.
Ever sneak away though, And I don't know.
I imagine it's like, oh, I know all those family vacations against are.
Oh, so now you guys get it right, Like why I have not totally?
Yeah, Oh, I can kind of understand why that would be difficult to tell mom and dad text I would have deleted it.
Yeah, I never thought I would say this, But maybe it's better not to tell mom and dad. And I'm going to cross my fingers and hope you break up by that.
I feel like she'll tell them for you.
It's not going to be horrible. Then if you don't tell him, then we can maybe even do closure call coming up or a second date update in the future like parents, No with Jake and his stepsister. Oh, it's the content that keeps on giving. That's what the segment is all about.
Why don't we just do a phone tap on the parents and see how they react and at.
The end we can go. It's a new recurring segment that we need.
I like it. Yeah, Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning