Combating your inner critic while overcoming pornography can be tough. That’s why Creed and Crishelle talked with Anthony Ennis this week on learning to love yourself so you can feel empowered to make the changes that lead to recovery. While studying neuroscience at BYU, Anthony worked with Dr. Scott Steffensen researching addiction and mental health problems. He is currently in the process of getting into medical school. The topic of pornography use hits close to home for him and he is looking ...
Sep 08, 2020•19 min•Season 1Ep. 38
No one is perfect. Not even our parents. And that is a great thing to remember when you evaluate the sex education your parents passed onto you. This week, Creed and Crishelle talk with Vauna Davis about how you can take your experience learning (or not) about sex from your parents and move beyond any embarassment or shame you may have inherited. In this episode: There is no “one size fits all” for sex education. Conversations about pornography and sex are awkward for your parents, too. Your par...
Sep 01, 2020•32 min•Season 1Ep. 37
Following through on commitments and holding yourself accountable to your partner is an important part of a trusting marriage. This week, Creed and Crishelle continue their conversation with Zachary and Rachel Andrews as they discuss how they make and follow boundaries involving pornography and other topics in their relationship. In this episode: Practicing good habits in all areas of your life can make for a happier marriage and aid in overcoming pornography. Establish accountability by creatin...
Aug 25, 2020•18 min•Season 1Ep. 36
Trust is essential in a relationship, whether you are first getting to know each other or have committed to be together forever. Creed and Crishelle talk with Zachary and Rachel Andrews about how they continue to work to create an understanding and trusting marriage even through issues with pornography. In this episode: The Andrews talk about their experience working through pornography issues at the beginning of their relationship. It’s ok to take time to think about your feelings before you tr...
Aug 18, 2020•20 min•Season 1Ep. 35
Have you wondered how to approach the subject of pornography at the beginning of a romantic relationship? In part 2 of this conversation, Creed and Crischelle talk with Karen Broadhead about how to know when a person is ready to date when recovering from pornography, and how to relate and heal with them. In this episode: Someone in recovery is able to be vulnerable in a relationship about their pornography use. Dating someone who is overcoming pornography requires willingness to understand and n...
Aug 11, 2020•17 min•Season 1Ep. 34
Whether you’re the one supporting someone recovering from a pornography addiction, or you’re receiving support in your own healing, there’s a lot to learn about relationships. Karen Broadhead, the founder of Mothers Who Know, discovered some important lessons as she supported her son in his recovery. Creed and Crishelle talked with her about what she learned as she and her son were searching for answers. Listen in to some great ideas that can help anyone navigate the challenges of relationships ...
Aug 04, 2020•21 min•Season 1Ep. 33
Shame, fear, and pornography addiction all create patterns of thought and behavior to meet subconscious needs. But those patterns can get in the way of the life we want. LaMonte Wilcox is a neuro mental health coach who has studied about our brains and how we can interrupt and change those patterns. Creed and Crishelle talk with him about understanding that process better. In this episode: Our brains run on a reward system, and it seeks to meet our needs. 95% of our decisions are made subconscio...
Jul 28, 2020•17 min•Season 1Ep. 32
What happens when you’re doing everything you know how to do to recover from using pornography, but you keep struggling and relapsing? For Maxwell Hill, feeling like he was drowning was the pathway to knowing that only Jesus Christ had the power to help him. Creed and Crishelle talked with him about how that lead to a deeper relationship with God the Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost. In this episode Maxwell’s experience with pornography as a young teenager and how his bishop and family re...
Jul 21, 2020•32 min•Season 1Ep. 31
Sexuality is talked about too much without the respect it deserves and not enough with the respect it deserves. When Marissah Hannig learned for herself what this meant, her desire to consume pornography began to disperse. She decided that she didn’t want to be someone who consumed pornography. Even when she felt that pull to view it, she would I think to herself “ That is not who I want to be. ” That same thought has helped her make other hard decisions. Listen in as Creed and Crishelle talk ab...
Jul 14, 2020•17 min•Season 1Ep. 30
For single members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and other religions, there can be some confusion about how to save sex for marriage and live your religious beliefs while also experiencing the sexual feelings that God gave you. Dr. Dean Busby, a professor at Brigham Young University, shares thoughts on navigating this challenge. You can hold boundaries without punishing yourself for being a sexual being. You can have a healthy sexual vision, accept that part of yourself, and...
Jul 07, 2020•22 min•Season 1Ep. 29
Living in recovery sounds nice, but what does it really mean? Our guest is a young husband and father who spent years entrenched in pornography and harmful sexual behavior until the day his wife discovered what was going on. That’s the day he calls the best day of his life. It was the first time he was ready to be fully honest. And even though it was traumatic for both he and his wife, it propelled them forward. He shares what his daily life is like now in order to live in freedom and honesty. H...
Jun 30, 2020•30 min•Season 1Ep. 28
Let's talk about relearning healthy sexuality after being exposed to harmful media, and overcoming the taboo on talking about sex! We continue the conversation with Laura Brotherson, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and Certified Sex Therapist (CST). You’ll love part 2 of her conversation with Creed and Crishelle about her insightful list of 20 characteristics of healthy and unhealthy sexuality. Show notes: Download the Raising the Bar on Intimate Relationships - 20 Characteristic...
Jun 23, 2020•26 min•Season 1Ep. 27
“Sex is God's wedding gift to a husband and wife.” That’s what Laura Brotherson believes! She’s a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and Certified Sex Therapist (CST). One of the best things any young adult can do to be ready to enjoy that divine gift is to see clearly the differences between sexual health and the unhealthy, distorted expectations and behavior that come from current media and culture. Don’t miss this first part of her conversation with Creed and Crishelle about her in...
Jun 16, 2020•27 min•Season 1Ep. 26
Our guest today is a young woman who has experienced two very different marriages - both times with young men who had some involvement with pornography. Hear how she realized she was in an abusive marriage and made the heart-breaking decision to leave. In time, she chose to marry again, even though her new husband had also struggled with pornography. Her new relationship and marriage has been wonderful. What made the difference? What are some signs of abusive or healthy relationships? Ultimately...
Jun 09, 2020•31 min•Season 1Ep. 25
We're all recovering from something on some level. Recovery is all about healing, growth, and change. It might be from a broken arm, a procrastination habit, or a pornography problem. Creed and Crishelle talk with Alex Theobald, a young therapist and PhD student at Texas Tech about using recovery principles to help us create the change we want. Alex encourages us to identify what we want in our life, what it looks like, and what actions will help us get there. Following recovery principles creat...
Jun 02, 2020•28 min•Season 1Ep. 24
Everyone can relate to that terrible feeling of wanting to shut down, disengage from people, and avoid situations because we messed up. Creed and Crishelle talk with Alex Theobald, a young therapist and PhD student at Texas Tech about being more resilient when we feel shame. He encourages us to be aware of when we feel shame. What are you learning about yourself? His top 3 steps to get past shame are to learn how to accept that you are experiencing shame. Then learn how to communicate that safel...
May 26, 2020•30 min•Season 1Ep. 23
Most of us grew up feeling awkward about saying the names of sexual body parts and how bodies respond sexually. Creed and Crishelle talk again with Harper Defreitas, a young woman who learned a lot while working for a leading sex therapist for LDS couples, Laura Brotherson. It's really important to be comfortable with these terms and know your body because you’re a sexual being - you’re in charge of your sexuality and your sexual experience. She says we need to get educated to know these differe...
May 19, 2020•27 min•Season 1Ep. 22
Some people wonder if it’s appropriate to get educated or talk about sexuality with single young adults who plan to save sexual relationships for marriage. Creed and Crishelle talk with Harper Defreitas about the benefits of learning about sexuality now. Harper is a young woman who learned a lot while working for a leading sex therapist for LDS couples, Laura Brotherson. She says education can lead to better decisions in dating, stronger self-mastery, and a healthy sexual mindset. It helps us de...
May 12, 2020•19 min•Season 1Ep. 21
Once you get started, how do you keep talking? Creed and Crishelle share some important principles for successful experiences. These conversations work best when it’s a two-sided discussion instead of a one-sided interrogation. You don’t have to make judgments immediately - work to be curious and learn about the other person. You can have dual emotions going on – compassion and fear, for example. Share your real emotions in an honest way, and be prepared to listen and accept how your partner is ...
May 05, 2020•18 min•Season 1Ep. 20
No need to worry about when to start talking about the issue of pornography – Creed and Crishelle share thoughts about how to know when it’s a good time depending on the phase of the relationship. And whenever that time is, it helps to give someone time to prepare for the conversation instead of just jumping in without warning. Show Notes: Get our Free Guide: How to Talk About Pornography When You’re Dating . Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here . Get transcripts and learn more ...
Apr 28, 2020•26 min•Season 1Ep. 19
Creed and Crishelle share 3 reasons why it’s important to talk about pornography with your romantic partner. It starts a pattern of open and honest communication in your relationship, you find out if your values are compatible, and you come to understand your significant other’s experiences and emotional context. Why does someone have the emotions they have? Some people have a ton of shame surrounding their pornography use. And on the other side, those who have been affected by friends or family...
Apr 21, 2020•17 min•Season 1Ep. 18
Weston shares how powerful it has been to confide in people about his problem with pornography. Starting with his mom, a good friend, a recovery group, and now with guests and listeners on his podcast. “What I've learned from having a community is that recovery is so much fun and it's so invigorating!” You’ll love this great conversation with Creed and Crishelle ranging from building community, to seeing true recovery as becoming excellent, to tips for staying strong during the COVID-19 quaranti...
Apr 14, 2020•27 min•Season 1Ep. 17
Alma and Karen Thurber return (together this time!) to share what they’ve learned about supporting each other's healing from the impact of pornography. Creed and Crishelle talk with them about how they carve out time for communication, how they make time for each other to do the things that help them keep progressing, and how inspiring it is to see your partner keep growing. They have a tradition of a weekly inventory, including praise and appreciation for the good things they’ve noticed about e...
Apr 07, 2020•21 min•Season 1Ep. 16
Creed and Crishelle talk with Jason McDonald, a 22-year-old student and former Reach 10 intern. Jason had a brief habit of using pornography when he was 13, and then decided it was making him feel terrible so he quit. However, pornography had distorted his beliefs about sexuality at that formative age. It influenced his thoughts and behavior with girls in his teen years. In time he talked with a friend in high school who was experiencing the same struggle. He found that connection can help ease ...
Mar 31, 2020•18 min•Season 1Ep. 15
Creed and Crishelle continue talking with Dr. Dean Busby, a professor at Brigham Young University in part 2 of this interview. He helps young adults understand some healthy approaches to sexuality, and what can get in their way. Research has shown there are 3 passion styles – either inhibited, harmonious, or obsessive. A harmonious style is balanced and in line with a person’s values. Also, some people adopt a sexual destiny mindset about their relationships – that if people are meant to be toge...
Mar 24, 2020•14 min•Season 1Ep. 14
If the sex education you got consisted of 2 things: 1. Don’t do pornography, and 2. Don’t be sexual before marriage, then this episode is for you. Creed and Crishelle talk with Dr. Dean Busby, a professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University, about getting past the DON’Ts of sexuality. He teaches that sexuality is the thing that uniquely defines marriage, and young couples shouldn’t have to figure it all out on their own. Education about what's normal, what bodies are like, a...
Mar 10, 2020•13 min•Season 1Ep. 13
Creed and Crishelle talk with Karen Thurber, a young wife, mom, and entrepreneur with her own flower business. She is learning to support her husband, Alma (see episode 11) in his recovery from pornography use, and continually working on her own healing as well. Karen shares 3 important tools that have helped her. First is self-care, second is communication in their marriage, and third is reaching out for support. You’ll hear about the power of boundaries, honesty, 12-step groups, and daily scri...
Mar 03, 2020•24 min•Season 1Ep. 12
Creed and Crishelle talk with Alma Thurber, a young husband, new father, and university student, about 3 of his top tools for recovery from compulsive pornography use. Hear his experience developing a growth mindset, setting good boundaries for himself, and building a support network. Alma shares the danger of a binary mindset (aka black and white thinking) and how it can get in the way of recovery. He shares examples of his boundaries to avoid triggering situations, and how he brought in more p...
Feb 25, 2020•18 min•Season 1Ep. 11
How are we being influenced by the sexual media that surrounds us? Creed and Crishelle talk with Bonnie Young, therapist & researcher, about the influence of sexual media on expectations of what sex should be like. Pornography shows the antithesis of healthy sexual relationships, and even subtle ideas that sneak into relationships can cause pain. Bonnie explains sexual scripts and encourages young adults to be aware and choose carefully what they believe. Click here for show notes with links...
Feb 18, 2020•19 min•Season 1Ep. 10
Start here if you're a first-time listener! Creed and Crishelle explain what Breaking the Silence is all about. All young adults have been affected by pornography in some way, but it's still hard to talk about. We're here to help! This is a safe and respectful place to share stories and ideas about overcoming the shame, silence and fear that keep people stuck in pornography. You'll also hear the positive side about building healthy sexuality. So subscribe and stay tuned, together we can break th...
Feb 09, 2020•6 min•Season 1Ep. 10
