Have you worried that your inability to moderate means that you're an alcoholic or that you somehow suck at having willpower or consistency? That's the old way of thinking. The new way is to recognize this problem for what it truly is. You're stuck on the Groundhog Day Cycle of Shame. In this episode, I'll breakdown the Cycle of Shame so you can self-diagnose if you're on it, and exactly which stage you're in. You don't want to miss: The 4 stages on the Groundhog Day Cycle of Shame The reason yo...
Oct 26, 2022•22 min•Ep. 51
Moderation is a myth. This is the first of four episodes dedicated to unlearning the myth of moderation and replacing it with a new way of having a healthy relationship with alcohol so you can easily and effortlessly take it or leave it. In this episode, we'll focus on the unlearning and why it's critical to see moderation in a new light. You don't want to miss: The reason moderation is the wrong way to change your relationship with alcohol. The questions you should be asking to determine the he...
Oct 25, 2022•21 min•Ep. 50
I debated for a while before writing and publishing this episode… but I feel pretty strongly about it… I think it's a must-listen for anyone doing Sober October (or any break from alcohol)! This episode is not about making Sober October sound bad. It's about making sure that anyone doing sober october gets the most out of it and avoids these common mistakes. You don't want to miss: The warnings about Sober October from a former Groundhog Day Drinker (and her clients). The painful results of my o...
Oct 12, 2022•26 min•Ep. 49
Getting right with alcohol is only the first step to truly fulfilling your purpose. Alcohol holds you back, but what happens AFTER? This week I got to reconnect with Jenn Linck after one year and we chat about life as an Optimized AFer. Jenn Linck is a personal trainer, healthy habit and accountability coach, a Chief Warrant Officer Three in the US Army Reserves, a champion collegiate rower, a former bodybuilder, mom, a wife, and a woman in recovery...but that's not the important part. The impor...
Sep 27, 2022•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 48
This episode is for everyone who is either drinking regularly without thinking about how it impacts your productivity OR everyone who is drinking regularly and wants to change the amount and/or frequency… ESPECIALLY if you're working on big goals for yourself! You don't want to miss: Why I prefer to talk about the benefits of being an AFer instead of the harms of alcohol The 6 areas of improved quality of life that people most often forget to acknowledge How these benefits are especially importa...
Sep 20, 2022•26 min•Ep. 47
If you're a self-made person, then you've likely encountered a few stumbling blocks along your path. Sometimes these are societal or cultural blocks, and often times, they are also deep brain blocks that hinder your progress. This is happening to you if you've had an idea or goal that you know "what to do" but taking action on it has just not happened at the rate you want it to. Growth feels slow, and you're telling yourself "it's supposed to be hard and take a long time, success doesn't happen ...
Sep 13, 2022•30 min•Ep. 46
Being an Optimized AFer doesn't mean never having moments of struggle. It means that you have the capacity to recognize struggles as symptoms of something that needs your attention. And sometimes those symptoms are showing you places where something is blocking you from full optimization (and if you're an over-thinker, you could really get into the weeds as to whether or not you're truly optimized if you still have a block…..but Optimization isn't a pinnacle we reach, and then light up our cigar...
Sep 06, 2022•21 min•Ep. 45
The days of either being an alcoholic or being a healthy drinker are long gone, if they ever truly existed in the first place. Now, we recognize that drinking habits can exist on a full spectrum, and whether or not you place on that spectrum is healthy includes defining your own boundaries for what is aligned with your goal lifestyle. Yes, there are critical markers for addiction, but what if you don't meet those markers and you're still unhappy with your relationship with alcohol? In this episo...
Aug 30, 2022•15 min•Ep. 43
There used to be a stigma (and practice) in which working on your mental and emotional wellbeing meant lying on a couch with a therapist behind you writing notes and judging your thoughts. Now, there are myriad ways mental wellness work might look. Chris McDonald works with counselors who feel passionate about bringing more holistic means of healing into the therapy room. She joins me today on the podcast to talk about her passion of holistic counseling. You don't want to miss: How Chris weaves ...
Aug 23, 2022•55 min•Ep. 44
Sometimes you might just want a plug-n-play manual to get you out of your funk. These six questions will help get your thinking brain focused in a new way, so you can more easily see why you're stuck and what you can do to get unstuck. Use these questions daily, weekly, or save them for difficult days where you're in your head and over-complicating. Make sure you download the free PDF journal of the questions to have on-hand anytime (without having to re-listen to the entire episode every time!)...
Aug 16, 2022•35 min•Ep. 42
If you're like most of my clients, you want to do things right the first time, because you want results sooner rather than later. But sometimes the tools we use for the Daily Support Pillar of the Trifecta of Change can actually cross over into the unhelpful category and end up keeping us more stuck! In this episode, I'll share three common mistakes that lead to a Value Lighthouse working against you instead of for you. You don't want to miss: The three common mistakes most perfectionists make w...
Jul 27, 2022•26 min•Ep. 41
You can't see your brain, so it can be a challenge to understand why things feel or react the way they do. Deborah Antinori has spent years studying the brain, especially from the perspective of why and how and where Brainspotting is working. In this interview, she shares her wealth of knowledge while also making something so seemingly invisible into something super relatable. You don't want to miss: The areas of your brain where thinking and stress response are happening, and why it's more bene...
Jul 12, 2022•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 40
As a high-achiever, you've probably heard the phrase "don't should on yourself," but then you've also been confused because there are times when action SHOULD be taken or else you'll never actually achieve your goals. It's confusing, so in this episode I break it down junior high style to simplify the decision about when to ignore a should and when to follow a should. You don't want to miss: The reason shoulds are confusing and have multiple meanings The trick to tell if a should is problematic ...
Jul 05, 2022•21 min•Ep. 39
How often does fear get in your way? If you're like most of my clients (and me!) then fear can have a bigger impact on your goals than you'd care to admit. In this episode, I'm joined by Nikki Maxwell to talk about her work on helping people befriend their fear. You don't want to miss: Nikki's take on spending time with the uncomfortable parts of ourselves How to overcome outdated beliefs and stories about ourselves The power of a supportive group of like-minded people PLUS, Nikki shares how she...
Jun 28, 2022•58 min•Ep. 38
If you've spent any time on the Groundhog Day Circle of Shame then you know it can feel defeating to have to start over and over again. But what if instead of starting over, you're actually moving through the stages of change and just don't realize it? But what ARE the stages of change? You don't want to miss: The traditional stages of change taught to professionals since the 70s My take on 3 additional stages unique to the journey of changing your relationship alcohol How to identify the exact ...
Jun 20, 2022•23 min•Ep. 37
If you've ever wondered why some people just seem more able than you to stick with a plan, even when you KNOW (in your adulty brain of course) that it's a solid plan. You find yourself slacking off, self-sabotaging, and then you feel ashamed because you couldn't even do the bare minimum to see results. In this episode, we'll explore why it's critical to understand your own value set before you take action, and how understanding it will also help you when things are difficult with your goal and y...
Jun 14, 2022•31 min•Ep. 36
Sometimes we self-sabotage without even noticing. Especially when it's disguised as being polite or flexible or having balance, even, sometimes, self-care! In this episode, I'll detail the red flags for each of the 4 types of self-sabotage, and then I'll tell you what to do when you notice them happening in your life. You don't want to miss: The red flags to clue you in that you're self-sabotaging The sneaky ways some self-sabotaging types can combine to confuse you into thinking you're on the r...
Jun 11, 2022•26 min•Ep. 35
Have you ever had a winning streak and then slipped up and thought "well sh*t, now I have to start all over again!"...or maybe you talked yourself into keeping your streak going but then had a nagging feeling inside that it "didn't really count"? We get messages about streaks from places like Peloton and Dry January, but is that really an effective strategy for seeing lasting habit change or is it a source of shame and self-sabotage? In this episode, we'll explore those questions. You don't want...
Jun 09, 2022•24 min•Ep. 34
If you've ever tried to change a habit only to find yourself back on groundhog day, or you've ever had a run of success and then noticed your old familiar friend of self-sabotage, then this episode is for you. In it, I'll dive into the 4 sneaky ways self-sabotage shows up. You don't want to miss: The 4 types of sneaky self-sabotage that are probably showing up right now with any goal you have Why some of these are actually protective and defensive responses from your subcortical brain How to rec...
Jun 07, 2022•31 min•Ep. 33
Do you have a coffee mug that sasyss , "this might be wine"? Do you look forward to that first pour of the evening when you can finally "relax" after a busy day momming? Do the messages you get as a parent make it feel like no one could possibly do this job if it weren't for alcohol? In this week's episode, I'm joined by Tessa Stuckey who shares her experience as a mom to 4 boys under 4 and being confronted with the reality that Mommy Wine Time wasn't doing her any favors. You don't want to miss...
May 31, 2022•53 min•Ep. 32
Have you ever broken down in frustrated tears (or anger) with the thought of "I just NEED A MINUTE TO REST!"? Or maybe you notice yourself trying to get everything done ahead of time so you can eventually rest without guilt, except there's always more to do. In this episode, I'll explain how sometimes the biggest barrier to Optimized Rest is your mindset. You don't want to miss: The lesson I learned the hard way about what happens in our bodies when we ignore the signs of stress and overwhelm Th...
May 24, 2022•41 min•Ep. 31
If you've been trying to change your relationship with alcohol for over one month, you've probably incorporated a few techniques. Maybe you've done programs with daily videos or exercises, maybe you've tried learning more about the science of alcohol. But if it still feels like something is missing, you might not have the full Trifecta of Change. In this episode I'll break down the Trifecta of Change so you can decide what might be the missing piece in your efforts. You don't want to miss: The 3...
May 16, 2022•28 min•Ep. 30
If you've been trying to change your relationship with alcohol for over one month, you probably have some feelings associated with the term "abstinence." In this episode, I'll explain why abstinence is not the goal if you're looking for a healthy relationship with alcohol, and how keeping it as your goal might actually be what's keeping you stuck You don't want to miss: What it means to your brain when you make abstinence your goal What if your goal IS to be fully alcohol-free? Isn't that abstin...
May 14, 2022•28 min•Ep. 29
We've upended the entire way you think about your relationship with alcohol! This third of five episodes in the Groundhog Day Drinking Mini-Series is going to blow your mind with the big AHA of why it's such an unrealistic goal to take a break and then stay stopped or moderated if you're a groundhog day drinker. You don't want to miss: The perspective-shifting AHA that will change the way you think about drinking and taking breaks The ACTUAL way to evaluate your own goals for alcohol What's comi...
May 12, 2022•26 min•Ep. 28
If you're like most of my listeners, you care about efficiency and getting things done as quickly and easily as possible. The truth is, alcohol will always make things less efficient… exactly HOW inefficient alcohol makes things depends on a person's exact relationship with alcohol. And the way we've been talking about a healthy relationship with alcohol is ALL WRONG. In this first episode of the Groundhog Day Drinking Mini-Series, I share the new and improved way to evaluate your relationship w...
May 10, 2022•39 min•Ep. 26
Maybe you know you want to have a different relationship with alcohol, but when you do dry challenges or take breaks, you end up feeling like you're right back at square one. You might be left wondering why what seems to work for everyone else isn't working for you. In this episode, I'll break down where the messages you get from the people around you when it comes to a healthy relationship with alcohol are probably only giving you partial information, and how to update the way you look at drink...
May 10, 2022•31 min•Ep. 27
Clint McAfoos, officially titled (by the two of us) as the Purveyor of Awesomeness, knows a little something about becoming Optimized AF by changing his relationship with alcohol. Clint is the leader of the Facebook Community "Peloton Blended AF." In this episode, Clint shares his own story about the process of defining his own healthy relationship with alcohol in a community dedicated to fitness and crushing goals. You don't want to miss: Clint's journey to being Optimized AF as a Dad and Faceb...
May 03, 2022•51 min•Ep. 25
If you're like me, you LOVE efficiency, and you LOVE when you can put as little time, energy, and dollars into something and get BIG returns on that investment. Maybe you love when you can help out a person who then learns how to help others in return. Maybe you love it when you can run all your errands in one smooth loop away from and back to home without any inconvenient stos and still returning with everything on your list. In this episode, I share what it means, and what it DOESN'T mean to b...
Apr 26, 2022•42 min•Ep. 24
If you're like me, life has been a bit of a whirlwind of things lately, and you've maybe also felt a bit chaotic at times. Between a move, an injury, and a new iteration of my program at work, I've had to turn to my trusty and reliable tool of self-brainspotting. In this episode I share about my experiences with self-brainspotting over the past 10 weeks. You don't want to miss: The 3 issues bringing up old stories in my subcortical brain and causing chaos in my daily life Which self-brainspottin...
Apr 22, 2022•33 min•Ep. 23
Have you had the same 3-4 tasks on your to do list for over 5 days? Have you bought at least 2 courses on business growth without finishing the work they recommend? Do you "know" what to do to move the needle on your business growth, but find yourself still in the startup stage of your work? If so, then you're probably a groundhog day entrepreneur. You don't want to miss: The red flags of a groundhog day entrepreneur Three of the mistakes you might be making that keep you stuck on groundhog day ...
Apr 07, 2022•15 min•Ep. 22
