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[BRACKET!]

Solid Platinum Hit Machinewww.bracketpodcast.com
[BRACKET!] is a weekly podcast that uses the single greatest hierarchy method known to mankind (the Sweet 16 Bracket) to sort out the absolute best in all fields: movie quotes, periods of time, cereals, logos, philosphical concepts, and types of sharks. New episodes every Friday. We are funded by our generous Patrons, including Gabe Silva, Jeff Criswell, Andrew Whipple, AverageJonah, Evan Baumel, GX Barnett, AnarchyMarie, Lindsay, Mikey Hall, Oliver Beattie, Ringthane, Tom Nemcek, and Michael Zavala.
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Episodes

Episode #100 - Best Thing

For episode 100, we pulled out all the stops. We do our first ever THIRTY-TWO ENTRY bracket, and we did it live. What topic could possibly be so important to require 32 entries? Why, Best Thing. Of, like, everything. If something isn’t on this list, it isn’t truly one of the best things, and by the end of this episode, you’ll know the *actual best thing* that exists. Meanwhile John hates on anime as usual, Jesse votes AGAINST ghosts, and Greg gets mad at Dan who actually helped us out a lot with...

Jan 13, 20161 hr 31 min

Episode #099 - Best Breakfast Food

Special guest Janette Goering joins us to gruffle down some greasy goodness in Best Breakfast Food. Meanwhile Greg brings up the commonly misinterpreted dichotomy between hashbrowns and home fries, John contemplates the wonders of the fruit bowl, and Cullen shares a pretty disgusting story regarding partially fertilized egg. Buckle up.

Jan 06, 201658 min

Episode #098 - Best Ball

Special guest Abed Gheith joins us once again for...look, we'll be honest with you here. We picked Best Ball because we thought it was funny. And it is! This is a really good episode. I mean, yes, it's an episode about balls. Ball jokes happen. It happens. But it's a really good episode, I promise. Meanwhile Jesse explains his role as the reincarnation of a famous TV star, Cullen explains his lifelong obsession with Truck Nuts, and Greg discovers which came first: Boba Fett, or Boba Bubble Tea.

Dec 30, 20151 hr 7 min

Episode #097 - Best Christmas Movie

Special guest and friend of the show Santa Claus of the North Pole joins us once again to help determine the Best Christmas Movie. Meanwhile Greg inquires as to how accurate of a documentary The Santa Clause is, Cullen proposes a bracket for 16 Best Traps In Home Alone, and Janel introduces us to Prime Minister Garbage who loves traaaaash.

Dec 23, 201553 min

Episode #096 - Best Bird

Special guest Michael Zavala, our very own stat guy and writer for The Cart Driver joins us to fly sky high with Best Bird. Meanwhile Cullen explains the horrifying genetic mutations present in all turkeys, Jesse explains what exactly is the deal with Birdo, and we once again dive into the well of making characters with the introduction of Jeff Microsoft, the ghost trapped inside Skype.

Dec 16, 20151 hr 4 min

Episode #095 - Best Star Wars Vehicle

Special guest Barry Kidd of Noise.FM and Wakovia Bank Robbers joins us to hunt down your opinions and freeze them in carbonite with Best Star Wars Vehicle. Meanwhile Jesse explains the intricacies of Star Wars sound design, John takes an AT-ST for a ride, and Cullen drops his drawers for a toy.

Dec 09, 201548 min

Episode #094 - Best Alien

Coming in from Roswell, New Mexico, we have the first ever in-person episode of [BRACKET!]. We decide the best alien amongst the four of us, resulting in Jesse talking about his 24 Yodas, Cullen getting super mad Lord Zedd isn't on this bracket, and John once again claiming the hot seat.

Dec 02, 201557 min

Episode #093 - Best Thanksgiving Dish

Gather round as the whole [BRACKET!] family, save for John who has fallen victim to the long-absent buffalo stampede, debates the best thanksgivin' dishes. Meanwhile Dan defends his aluminum-eating habit, Cullen demands a ham jacket, and Janel tells us what celebrities correlate to which entries on the bracket.

Nov 25, 20151 hr 1 min

Episode #092 - Best Nintendo Property

Special guest Alex Jaffe, Editor-in-Chief of Comic Roulette joins us to fire-flower metroids and throw pokeballs at squidkids in Best Nintendo Property. Meanwhile Greg reveals his greatest 3DS-based shame, John explains why Splatoon is Nintendo's future, and Cullen just can't seem to pick a winning side.

Nov 18, 20151 hr 9 min

Episode #091 - Best Pizza Topping

Special guest Andrew WK, rock legend, self-help expert and party elemental, joins us to finally determine one of the first [BRACKET!] topics we ever thought of: Best Pizza Topping. Meanwhile Greg, Cullen and John take bets on which of these toppings Jesse has had on pizza before, Greg notes this may be our most high-brow show yet, and we repeatedly mention that vegetables leak water into your pizza, which seems unappetizing.

Nov 11, 20151 hr 3 min

Episode #090 - Best Fighting Tournament

Special guest Persia of Team Brokentier joins us to engage in hand-to-hand combat to determine the Best Fighting Tournament. Meanwhile Greg technically votes *against* a robot-centric entry, John discusses the things Unreal Tournament is more popular than, and Jesse introduces us to yet another beloved cold-open character, Coldstein Opalman.

Nov 04, 20151 hr 8 min

Episode #089 - Best Way to Die

Special guest Johnny Mac, Veto King of Big Brother 17 and Dentist Extraordinaire joins us to send Spookymonth to the grave with Best Way To Die. Meanwhile Dan McKenney suffers Greg's "game move," Cullen explains the similarities between hot tubs and volcanoes, and Janel SantaCruz establishes that TV is the future.

Oct 28, 201559 min

Episode #088 - Best Demon

Special guest Steve Yurko, illustrator and podcaster, joins us to continue Spookymonth and summon up an answer as to who is truly the Best Demon. Meanwhile Greg affirms his devotion to the True Queen of All Life and Death Lilith, Jesse tells an interesting piece of trivia about Raven from Teen Titans, and we meet Chaz Krampus of the Autobahn.

Oct 21, 20151 hr 19 min

Episode #087 - Best Vampire

Special guest Irene Koh, illustrator and artist for comics like TMNT and Batgirl, joins us to put a stake in the heart of the topic of Best Vampire. Meanwhile John reveals his horrifying cereal preferences, Cullen discusses his uncomfortable interviews with a vampire and also his grandparents, and everybody votes incorrectly the entire way through.

Oct 14, 201552 min

Episode #086 - Best Costume

Special guest Nell Bailey, prolific cosplayer and host of Transformers comics Lets Read podcast Sound.wav helps us open season 6 with Best Costume. Meanwhile Greg explains his Shia LaBeouf costume, Jesse reveals the absolute best way to get him back to your place for Netflix and chill, and the whole gang confuses the idea of "costume" with the actual entry. Also we introduce our new season 6 mechanic, the [BRACKET!] HOT SEAT.

Oct 07, 201558 min

Episode #085 - Tournament of Champions V

What a season, what a season. Tournament of Champions V puts a pretty bow on Season 5 with our first ever live episode, taking tiebreakers from audience decision. We also introduce Lady Groddga, the Poot Beer Scrote, and Imperator Daffiosa.

Sep 30, 201551 min

Episode #084 - Best Looney Tune

Special guest and friend of the show Open Mike Eagle of Secret Skin and Conversation Parade joins us once again to figure out which melody is merriest with Best Looney Tune. Meanwhile Cullen reveals his knowledge of leather jackets, John makes a fatal mistake in the pronunciation of the national park "Yosemite" and we have what is widely agreed to be the best finals we've ever had.

Sep 23, 201547 min

Episode #083 - Best Sport

Special guest, friend of the show and Rolling! DM Dan McKenney joins us to score for the home team with Best Sport. Meanwhile Uncle Joey from Full House briefly replaces Jesse, Greg makes a weird joke about a wooden maxi pad I can’t actually understand looking back on it now, and John just can’t get enough of the Snivley Hoot-Toots in his latest NatureBox.

Sep 16, 20151 hr 5 min

Episode #082 - Best Missing Hand

Special guest Fin Hickey, animator and illustrator, joins us once again to discuss the best fictional character who has less than the traditionally assumed number of hands. Meanwhile John discusses the aesthetics of beefy robotic arms, Cullen repeats the phrase “Candarian Demon” over and over, and Greg makes an amazing Natalie Imbruglia goof that goes totally unnoticed.

Sep 09, 20151 hr 1 min

Episode #081 - Best Frozen Treat

Special guest Aubrey Sitterson of Straight Shoot and SKALD joins us to close out the summer months with a scrumptious frozen treat. Meanwhile John invents the concept of a Float Sommelier, Cullen makes frozen banana with nuts dick jokes, and Greg complains a lot about the structure of this particular bracket (because it is WRONG).

Sep 02, 201552 min

Episode #080 - Best TV Dad

Special guest and go-to fifth bracketeer Janel Santacruz joins us once again to determine the dadliest of dads delivered by delevision. I mean television. Meanwhile we ponder the qualities of Herman Munster's dong, John makes a very specific request for fanart, and Greg and Jesse get emotional about Greg Universe and Goku.

Aug 26, 201558 min

Episode #079 - Best DC Villain

Special guest Steve Sickmen of Press A To Listen joins us once again to be part of our superstitious, cowardly lot. Meanwhile John ponders the name "Reverse-Flash," Cullen reveals how badly he wants to smooch the entire cast of Arrow, and Greg gets super frustrated from the get-go with pretty much every result, only to find there may yet be redemption in this world.

Aug 19, 201551 min

Episode #078 - Best Sound

Special guest Mila Pokorny, game designer and artist, joins us to present the Best Sounds directly into your ears. Meanwhile Greg explains what game has the worst menu sounds of all time, Cullen explains how someone truly earns a leather jacket, and we say "baby giggles" so much because it's really fun to say out loud.

Aug 12, 201551 min

Episode #077 - Best Female Pop Star

Special guest Abbie Maley joins us to...alright, look. I'm going to level with you, here: you're gonna get mad about this one. People you hold as idols are destroyed. Just remember, we're always correct and you should never question that. Meanwhile, Jesse reveals his first roller-rink moment with Cher, John reveals the only thing he ever argues with Cullen about, and the whole cast chooses not to discuss Gummo.

Aug 05, 20151 hr 3 min

Episode #076 - Best High School Clique

Special guest Sean Baptiste joins the show once again to relive all the painful memories of High School Cliques. Meanwhile Jesse helps us discover the Iron Man of Juggalos, Greg explains why he can’t be around theater people for five god damn minutes, and find out what anime character Cullen owns silk shirts of.

Jul 29, 20151 hr 10 min

Episode #075 - Best Podcast Advertiser

Special guest and friend of the show Dan McKenney, dungeon master of the Rolling! podcast, joins us to tear apart the most common podcast advertisers. Meanwhile Greg discovers how to get away with shitting his underwear every day, Dan assembles a LootCrate live on air, and we are introduced to the lovely Joey Hortada.

Jul 22, 201558 min

Episode #074 - Best Emoji

Special guest Michaela Dietz, voice of Amethyst on Steven Universe and friend of the show, joins us once again to discuss the hippest, coolest, dumbest, most cutting edge method of communication: Emoji. Meanwhile Greg writes a screenplay based on the life of Information Desk Person, Cullen forever corrupts the Person With Folded Hands emoji, and John once more brings about the eternal battle between Goth Cousin and Drunk Uncle.

Jul 15, 201554 min

Episode #073 - Best Castle

Special guest Zach Paez, writer for Gravity Falls and Community joins us to hold down the fort with Best Castle. Meanwhile Greg explains why he'd probably feel pretty uncomfortable at Hogwarts, Jesse gives the world the First Ever Moderately Interesting Pluto Nash Story, and Cullen wants to eat chicken straight out of the walls. It was in the walls dude, you probably shouldn't eat it! Could be, like, asbestos chicken.

Jul 08, 201553 min

Episode #072 - Best Party

Special guest Jessica Michelle Williams joins us to party down catering service with Best Party. Meanwhile Greg reveals his surefire legendary bachelor parties, Cullen reveals the best cake ever, and John is just especially cute in this one, I don't know, I just think he's cute. So is Jesse. We're all so fucking cute.

Jul 01, 201546 min

Episode #071 - Best Thing To Do With a Dollar

Special guest Abed Gheith, Rick and Morty writer and friend of the show, joins us to figure out the absolute best way to spend a single United States Dollar. Meanwhile Cullen admits to larceny on air, Bracket officially endorses the recreational use of a Schedule II controlled substance, and even sweet, dear Jesse talks about the crimes he has committed.

Jun 24, 20151 hr 1 min
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