#65 - Bobby Talks About His Surprise Trip to Haiti

like well we were by other people. I don't feel that way now Amy has change my perspective and I and even now even more software going over there, my perspective changed. And not that anyone's value is more or less, but the whole they're supposed to be borders with poverty is weird to me, meaning everyone's like, you know, I'd

like to help people they're close. With that logic, if your neighbor was sick three houses down, but your next door neighbor was sick, that means you would only help your next door neighbor first before you went to the one three houses down. But who's closer to you? Matters. Apparently two people mostly like anything. Help help someone in your community, don't you know? It's like St. Jude's and Memphis and people go by. You know, I just help kids,

and you know, wherever I am, that's great. I think you should. But it shouldn't be an excuse not to help somewhere else, and it shouldn't be a reason for you to get angry. It's someone for helping somewhere wherever they go. It doesn't matter how far they are from you, doesnt matter where they live, they're ten miles. Is someone ten miles from you more important than someone three hundred

miles from you. That's a real question, and that's something that I've had to struggle and ask myself, because I too was like, I want all my money to say right here in my town, help my people. But then

you start to go out of town. And it started for me after traveling around the United States and playing at hospitals all over the country and then playing the Saint Jude to Memphis, Memphis, Tennessee radio shows, not there like I mean, I have no personal affiliation there until I went and realized that Saint Jude was a place where everybody comes for all over the world for free. I was like, oh, man, I didn't know this. I was just so uneducated. And um, I feel like I've

been able to educate myself in a lot of ways. Again. I go play hospital in Boston, I go play hospital in Dallas, a play hospital, and I don't say, like, look at all the hospitals I'm playing, But I'm just saying it doesn't really matter where people are. If people want to help someone else, like, that's great, that's it. That's just great because they could help nobody. People will get mad at Amy all the time, like why are you helping kids over me? Why doesn't what if she helped? No?

Would you rather help nobody? So my perspective change changed over the years. I maybe a thing here. Let's see, oh sleep number. You've heard me talking about my sleep number bed and how well I sleep. Sleep number setting is thirty and my partners is well dustin isn't is? It says here my partners is If I's married, I'm supposed to say what my partner sleep number is. My

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and I'll get to that. I guess my point was at the very beginning of this how many notes or anything, is that I would see people get angry at Amy first years ago, then at me later when I would help hospitals that weren't in the town I was living in our hospitals that people weren't in the town. Or it would be like, man, like I used to think, the same thing I would to be. I wouldn't be mad at them. I would just be like, man, I

wish you could see that humans just are human. You can help anybody that's awesome, Like there's not there shouldn't be a line or a body of water that you cross and all of a sudden they're not as important, or the further away they are, they're not as important, Like distance makes them less important. And so I credit one Amy first to open them my eyeballs to that absolutely, And secondly, a lot of great people that have said, hey, come to these hospitals. And so I've been lucky enough

to do that. I've done. I'm on and I'm on the National Board of Musicians on Call, which is a fantastic organization, and um, obviously we do a lot of Saint Jude. So I decided, let me just get to the guts of the story here. After that little soapbox, I decide that weeks ago I was gonna go to Haiti, and all of a suff you here on the ear over the past week was all just me stringing Amy into a bet already having it planned. You knew that, right.

And I had a lot of few people know how to call my doctor because I had to get I was like, what do I have to get shots at my penis? Like what I have to do? Because I was I was scared. I was scared for many reasons. Why because they have to take medicine just to go there, And it's scary to take medicine just to go somewhere. There are many places in your life where you have to take a month prescription just to step foot on the land. And so it's like, yeah, you have to

take a month of malaria medicine. And I'm like just to go there for a weekend that yeah, And so again it was important to Amy. So I was like, okay, because you can have crazy dreams and man, and I had to take it like the week before I went, and I'm still taking it crazy dreams. You and I would nake it about three out the last four nights, Mike, Yeah, I know, not really just a different scenario. So, um, I'll be serious. Uh two and a half weeks so ago,

I said, Okay, I'm going to Haiti. It was really the only weekend that I had off was this past weekend because I get back on the road and do some get back on the road doing stand up comedy, get back on the road doing um raging idiot stuff. So and so I let my doctor no, Mike new And I think at the that point that was just about it. And Mary Mary my friend, who um were you clothing together? Um? We do Pama joy together? You know it's me her and Amy do Pima joy um.

Because she'd been there, I need somebody because Amy's houseband couldn't go. He's his name to go and I would have taken I would have went with Amy. But she told me on the air right it I was about to book the trip that she could not go back. She said, the last time I left was the last time that I'm gonna be able to go until we get our kids because they expected to get their kids rather soon. And she was like, I can't go back because they were devastated that they came and then left again.

And so I was like, oh, whoa, that's crest. That's weird. So now I have to kind of go by myself, but I'm still gonna go committed to going. I mean, the best friends of the whole life. And so I'm like, all right. So Mary from California flew to Atlanta and I was nervous as nervous for a whole week beforehand, but I knew I was going, and I want her to lure Amy into something. And I was like, stuff, how went would get a tattoos? She was like yeah, because you know I wasn't gonna go secretly, I was

already planning, and so she agrees, and it's funny. I don't know what's gonna happen there, but um, I wanted to play music. I don't take my guitar and play with the orphans for kids and so called. Nikita, who is Australian, is singer songwriter in town and really good friend. She plays in The Raging Idiots, something she opens for me on stand up comedy x um. So I was like, hey, let's go to Haiti, and she was, you know, she strives like Haiti. Never been there. Okay, So then she

was like, I gotta take medicine for a month. I was like, yeah, I know. And so we you know, our plan was to fly down Friday morning, like like the flight was like nine thirty or something. I was going to leave the show a little bit early, and so you know, sometimes if I have to leave earlier, it's don all record the last thirty or forty five minutes the show. And so I recorded the last part of the show. I was ready to go, and then I got a note beforehand said, uh, your flight's been canceled.

I got a note canceled, not delayed, canceled, and I was like, how is it canceled? Kindly, some people get sick on the flight, and to people get sick, they couldn't fly it down to Atlanta. So that was the only option to get me there, to get me to Haiti, unless I took the one like an hour and a half before, which meant I had to record I don't know, the hour and half of the show really quickly. So I did, I Amy and I went in the studio. Bam bam bam, knocked it out. Luckily we had that

dance party. We knocked out the show. Jumped in the car, flat tire, stuck, so I'm like, it's not already slept in dog crab, flat tire. Like. Uh, got to the airport, couldn't get on that flight. So my normal flight was the delay like two and a half hours. Couldn't make it down to I got it on the next flight, made it under Atlanta, but I miss my connector to Haiti. One flight in Haiti, so I had to spend the

night in Atlanta at an hotel Atlanta. So what was gonna be all day Friday, a day, Saturday night, all day Saturday, all day Sunday. So we get to porta Prints which is in Haiti, and uh, I don't know what I was getting into. I've been to the Bahamas different and they're some they're kind of close. Bamas are a lot closer, but it's like the Bahamas and there's I was looking at the map because I don't know where I was, Like I was there and I really

had no idea where I was on the map. So I'm like Google in the map and it's like over the top of Cuba, which is past the Mahamas, because the Bahamas the right off Florida and I've been to the Bahamas before and I was looking at it and um, the land. We get off the plane and everyone you had to wear covered shoes and um. We met security there. Andy's husband who got a security because I was like, I don't care what it costs, I'll pay for security. I'm not. I don't want to get shot. I don't

I don't know what's happening. It's secured to that, and it was. It was Mayhem's Mayhem. It was at the airport, like I mean, there's just people are screaming everywhere, like they're not even lines. They're like, what's happening? And so I'm wide eyed. They lost my bags, so I'm looking for my bag. There there are bags just laying on the ground like they're just taking them and throw them off the car under the ground, and I'm like, man, there's like nothing I've ever been in before. So I'm

already spooked a little bit. Rat the bag finally found my back. Niki defines their bag and we get into the rental car. The roads there they're not. They're not American roads. There aren't two lanes, they have holes in the middle of them. They have huge drops like you think roads are bad in certain states because there's not enough taxes going into it. Ten time force in that here, and there are no stop signs, no traffic lights. There are four ways we used to haunk Kong Kong Kong,

Kong Kongong. Make sure abody looking at you go through. And there are people standing out in the middle of the road always it's weird. They're weird. Um, just I've never seen there'll be no rules like that. There are people outside of any kind of stores to go with the shotgun. Went to the grocery store at one point two guys with shotguns just standing right out tot of front of the store, just twelve games, shotguns, pumps just sitting there. When ms some groceries, but but stuff with

the kids, candy, cookie stuff like that. Um. I went to the orphanage for the first day and didn't really know what I was getting into again. Never been. But you have to go up to the nowk and this big metal gate and they opened it. It's like threefold. And the guy we're with is pretty well known around town. He's like, hey, it's me. So we're going to the orphanage. They shut that gate and there's another gate you get to that gate. It's to keep people from going in

and like robbing the place because they make bread in there. Um, so go in and you cant have the truck. And it's just kids everywhere, not not even in a not like warm nice kids everywhere. It's hot. It's obviously there's no air conditioning. There's just a a thing of the air conditioning. Even their beds aren't. There's no air conditioning ever, and so a bunch of kids in every room. They're like different age groups. One room had like through you know,

babies to three year olds, boys and girls. But then once they got older they started to split. No this age you know, different rooms, different little buildings, but all in rather a small area like three small buildings. Everything was was like that. All the kids just wanted to be held. Everybody wanted to be held, like they would just run up to you and just jump in your arms. And the first you were like, do they want something? But what they wanted it was just any sort of

affection at all because they don't get it. They have a few nannies there. They're watching. Amy said, seventy kids. All I saw three nannies watching seventy kids. So there's And another thing that I noticed was they had a bag and the bags had candy and cookies and the and they went into them and we were like boom. They were just grab a grab, grab, and I was like, oh boy, here we go. And they started passing about

to each other. Again, these are kids that don't have anything, and instead of grabbing and like stuffing in their pockets, are running away with it. They started making sure everybody had equal amounts immediately, like you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, And I was like, whoa, this is not like western groups of kids. This is not like me. I was a kid like at Oreos, I'll take seven. And so they all equally passed, and it was very much lookout

for each other, type of society inside of it. Even playing basketball, they passed the ball, no balls, there was no ball. Hog. Playing basket was amazing. I was they passed, they passed it right to me. Wow, So they're not that We're all lebron the cist, the cist, the cist they're crazy. Um, they love iPhones, like nineteen years old. They know how to use them. They don't have mirrors

the orphanage, so they never see themselves. So when you take a picture, they're like, oh, like they see themselves and the picture. That's the timely when they see each other, like they see themselves by looking at a picture you took. So they're fascinating with pictures, and so we took a watch selfies. This is what we did so they could look at themselves and look and be like oh and laugh. But as there, I saw one mirror the entire time,

and it was adult height. You couldn't see it if you were a kid, and it was for like the person whos running the orphanage. So there are no mirrors there. Um. I don't know if I ever saw like a water fountain. I'm sure they have water somehow, I don't know. They kept us away from the water because the water was

super clean there. Um. They shared the phones and the iPads because we all had our phones, and we let the kids play with them and they would play a game and when they would lose their pass it another kid and I was like, this is incredible. I've never seen anything like this. They play minecraft, not play it pass another kid? What mean they're not getting it back? They would just passing another kid. It was the most unselfish thing I've ever seen from eight year olds, from

eleven year old and they just wanted to play. They just wanted to be held. They wanted to They love music. We took a guitars to playing music and they knew when I grew up then then up bupp they would sing it. They loved the strom, the guitar with their hands. They just loved any anything UM where it felt like

you were giving them attention. And so the first day came and went and UM since we got their new niche, we didn't get a stay the whole time because they want you out of there by six not out of there, want you if you're not from there, going to be inside your wherever you're gonna be by like six pms what they said. At six seven, we went to dinner. UM we took security with us and head of the orphanage and we saw Anderson Cooper at dinner andson Cooper

walked in, which is crazy. And I went dinner with um Amy's kids and the head of the orphanage because since she wasn't there, he had to be there, which is fine with us. We just wanted to go. And her son dances like crazy, and it was it was weird to me because I've only seen them in videos and pictures. They were real life. It was like seeing a celebrity You've only seen him on TV forever and finally you're like, whoa Like John hamm is in the airplane next to me, Like you know Danny Gollecki from

is walking down the street from Big Bang Theory. You know, It's what I felt like. I've only seen that for years. I watched them grow up and now who they are. And so we go back to the second day. And by the second day, and I know a little bit of French, but French in French creole slightly different. So I had a kid translator who I could talk to other kids with and I would be like, hey do you say but I need to saying. I would repeating

a new numbers on dutoits. I knew um general expressions, bonsois, bonjours, I know all the easy stuff and so but I had a little translator. We I go and talk to the kids, talk to the orphan and they had the orphan engine. I was like, he, how do you get kids? He said, people should just drop them off the door. We would take and he said, we're packed right now, We're full. I can't take any more kids, he said,

but they have to go to the government now. So they go to the government and the government feeds them over and that's how they have kids. And they were maxed out at whatever the number they were maxed out there, and so uh, the second day we win, and we took a bunch of when I grew up, t shirts and markers and colored that, posted some pictures on the ground and play ball. And again, they just liked to do things. I know, it sounds like it's nothing like,

what's the thing it's like to do anything? Anything that's not every day? Just sitting outside and U when I was leaving, and it was really the only time that because the whole thing to me was just like, Wow, You've never seen anything like this. I've never I've never seen poverty at that level. I've seen poverty a lot of levels myself. When I was a kid um where I wouldn't always have three mills a day. We'd take a mill at school sometimes because you just want me.

The kid didn't have a meal, especially in high school, like junior high. Mostly high school was working. But it's it's nothing like this. They share clothes. It's like they get washed by the nannies and they just grab some clothes. They eat basically rice every day, so there's no protein, so it seems some of them are underdeveloped. Um, it was just from someone who grew up in a pretty

poor place. This is a different level. And in general they were happy and not happy because they had a lot, happy because their attitude was it was just different than what we have. We're very much a me me, me, me me society and there I let's all take care of each other. And they were they were they were happy kids. Some kids fell down and started crying, like seven kids. Remember to make sure it's okay, because I was like, whoa, this is not what happens in America.

And so when I was leaving, it was the time when it hit me. I was because I just like, I'm going to say as numb as possible, I know I'm gonna se Amy's kids in the next month, two months, three months, whenever, So I'm going to meet them and it was really for Amy. I owed it to her, and um, I was leaving, and I was like, this sucks because most of these kids will never have even the opportunity to have an opportunity. I didn't have opportunities, but I had an opportunity to get an opportunity. Like

nothing was given to me. I grew up. Yeah, food stamps, welfare, whatever you want to say, bah, then go to dinners and go doctor way way. But I had a school, had had a literal public school with teachers, and if I wanted to, I could study, and I can learn, and I can then take a c T. And I gut study and and I wanted to do good in the A s C. I could. I did. And I want to go to college. And you take out loans

or you get scholarship, you do. And then my parents, my mom even know where I went to college, Like I just want I just told her. I was like, hey, I'm going to I'm leaving to go to college tomorrow. She was like, where are you going? And I told her I just left. That was it. But I had that opportunity to do that. I want to college, I want to study. I go to college and study I want to get a job in my desired profession, which I go to that and then I can jump my

desired profession. And they don't have that opportunity, don't have the opportunity. They don't they they don't have even the most common basic things that we have. Multiple can have the shot to have that. And when I was leaving,

I felt terribly guilty. Was like, I'm gonna go back home and land my bed and tomorrow night I'll have it on nick and night watching TV land and m M. You know, for me, this was just a trip, just and it says their life like so yeah, it hit me and I didn't want it to and I tried to not make it hit me, but it did. Um not even it's the biggest part. There's very lit opportunity,

even to create an opportunity for yourself. I believe in this country a lot of people and some people have to work harder than others to get the same Some people have to work a lot harder than others to get the same thing, and but you still have the shot at it. And so we don't have the shot over there, and it's it sucks, and it takes so

long to help these kids. So that was I'm probably glossing over a hundred stories, but because it's still fresh, I took a lot of pictures videos posted them today. Some I don't want to post too many. Amy was freaked out. She was I talked to you after the show, and I was like, hey, it came mad at me for not taking you, and she wasn't, but I know she wished that she would have been there. But she told me, in a complete moment of sanity, that she did not want to go back because she couldn't. She

could not go back. She didn't say that in an emotional part. She said, I can't go back because it's not good for the kids or it's not good for me. And because she said that I didn't take her, and she if she'd have been like really emotional when she said, I would have went back to our talk to about but she was at a good point and ah, yeah, that was it. So I'll do this commercial her. Do you have anything you want to ask? Oh, like, what was the like the interaction you have with their kids

like talking to him. Well, there's a language barrier first, but they just want to hold your hand and hold your arm and they want you to hold them if they're small and they like candy. It's not like we're talking about outliers, you know, it's like any other kid. You know, your your language is basically affection and hugs and games and darna ball and that's what it is. And occasionally you'd have a kid it's like a really good English for for that and they're like, hey what

you know, what what are they saying? And the mayd always be something like hey, I want to go and play ball or something, But yeah, there were it was like it wasn't too different than young kids here because even though the language is different, listen, what do I know? What have I come with a kid? Like I'm always confused how to talk to kids like six year olds, like we're not even in common. Yeah, hey man, you cool um already talk about Wagwalker for a second, Like

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your first walk free. I love WAG walker says I'll be at work extra light and a WAG and they'll come walk to dog like from GPS, like Uber for dog walkers for good walkers. Anyway, I love wag walk wagwalk or wag or wag any other question Mike did an these kids like know you know not at all. No, they knew Mary because she's been there a bunch. Um. They warmed up to me really quickly, especially her son.

For me, I don't know what to talk about to a girl anyway, because like a ten year old, So it was a lot easier for me to talk to a six year old boy than a ten year old girl. But there were two girls, and so I talked to her a little bit, and she knew English a little bit, and so we would talking about little things. But I spent a lot of time with him because as a boy, it was just easier to play ball the boys and

I was really out. I felt like I was in their house and there I don't know, I don't want to do anything wrong in their eyes, all any of them. Like I just felt like I was in their house and I don't want to come. But yeah, now they don't know, but they don't care, and they just I mean Amy's daughter like with like the leader, grab stuff, pass it around, grabs up, passing around amazing son. Um, I'm tiny but pretty athletic to be so tiny. I can really really small. I can catch a ball and

throw a ball pretty well. I was like, wow, like you're a tiny little tot. But again, I think he's small because he hasn't developed yet. I think he's underdeveloped. I think he'll get bigger when he gets here. So yeah's that anything else? I think you know a lot of people on the show we're talking about going leaving on the scariest part for me was the airport on the way home, trying to get out of there because landing you just you're already, you're there. It's like you

just gotta get out of the airport. Going into the airport, you gotta get all your stuff and get your tickets. You gotta go. It was Mayhem. It was like something you see in a movie another part of the world. I don't even know. They were like five counters, just people yelling ah, like chickens running around, goats. I don't even know what was happening in the airport. And we were like, oh my goodness, we were and we waited first.

We were like hey, and they were like, oh um, we don't we need to call America make sure we have your tickets. Waited for like an hour the way to get there like two or three hours early way three hours really, and so got there, waited for like an hour at the desk, then went to there's no seating really in the like food court. We have food court. It's just a hallway with a couple of chairs. People sell on the floor everywhere, no air condition, no air condition,

doors are open, so everybody's miserable. It's a sauna in there. Were waiting there for an hour and a half and they're like, okay, get in line. We got in line, waited for an hour, just stood up and they go through and they check you, check your you know you're not. They go through every part of your bag, they check your body, everything. And then we got on a bus and got busted all the way through taxi like beat up runway. And got on an airplane, walked up the

steps on a big plane. We weren't even the airport anymore. I don't even know what what was happening. I was so happy to get on the airplane. Uh yeah, it was. It was nuts. But I didn't go out to the city. I was there for two days, you know, the Saturday and Sunday, but yeah, there's really one of those things where you see things and you go, man, I was so ignorant before because I was the person that was like, I want to make sure my money's kept right here

at home, and I think it's important to do that. Um, but I also think that to go, Hey, why are you worried about somebody in China? Are you worry about somebody in Ethiopia? Somebody's adopting from Uganda? Human beings. Man, you go over there and you look them in the eyeballs, your perspective will change completely. The only thing different about them they were born in different part of the worlds it. That's it. And they could use help too. So does

my experience, I'm sure. I mean, Amy had so many questions and she was like, I don't even know where to start. But yeah, the whole hiding up for her was crazy. And now I would live at Little Easter Eggs the whole time, because again Andrews Cooper and we're like, yeah, I now I would. I told her, so I'm doing a so how My story to her was have to go to Atlanta because I'm hosting an event for Dollar General.

It's a big corporate event. And as like I have to go talk to the Dollar General and I'm trying to convince them to, you know, hire me for this gig. And I already even hired, but it was my way to get down there. And I took my guitar and she's like, why do your guitar? I was like, oh, I got play songs. They have to know I'm like all around performer. And so I went down and even FaceTime to her as I was down there as better than I was an a tankist. They were doing was

like got dinner. It was a tank top beard, like my facial hair is grown out. She never thought thing about it, and little things like and if you don't want to Andrews the Cooper's Instagram right when I said I saw him, he was in Port pres Haiti. So there were little things that I did, um and the little bankas said to Amy when I was back to like, oh how did I put that together? Oh? And I knew she wouldn't. I hope she wouldn't, And I would text her pretty frequently be like hey, what up? You know?

I was all, you're doing a jump rope on Instagram and to see if she'd be like, hey, well, by the way, are you says she never had any idea, And this morning, when I played the audio back and me with kids at the orphanage, she thought, I just found some random kids in Atlanta. They were Haitian and they were like, I guess in her mind, I just found some kids. Were like, hey, you're Haitian like Amy. Kids lots to yell at Amy. She was so confused.

And then when I played the cup of her son and she's all picked her on my phone with them, she started crying and I, yeah, it was it was it was nuts. It was nuts. So people wanted me to talk about it. That's that's kind of what I know. I don't really know a lot I went. Would you go back, Yeah, I would go back. I'll go back with I'm gonna go back with security again. For sure. I'll go back with security again. But yeah, I would go back. It's just like, they're just a lot of places,

you see, and they need help. And the reason that I went was because I have so many close friends that that's important to them, Like Amy, the closest of my friends, it's very important to her. And if it's important to somebody's close to me, it is important to me, and I was selfish for not going, and man on Twitter, I was like, oh the bed, I'm not Amy been twenty times. You want to tell somebody that the best tell Amy? I knew crap. I did one of what

she's done, so it was good. And I I'm not even gonna say encourage you to go there, because I don't. I encourage you to find somebody or something that can use your help. I'll block down the road, get on the internet a hundred miles down the road, so another state. I wonder, you know what, somebody in Oklahoma less important

than somebody in Arkansas arcause that was closer. I just don't like those rules and want of any people will go, oh, I can't believe you're supporting Why don't you keep it domestic? That was a big thing for what long? It still is when you adopted it. She tried to adopt domestically, and if she hadn't, it's still none of your freaking business. Like she's helping a human and being good has no boundaries or time zones. You're helping out another human with

heart and lungs and a mind. So yeah, my admiration, FRAMI if it could get any bigger. It did, so anyway, there's that the end. I don't know if that was a good story or not, but that was my trip there. I lost the tooths, got a flat tire, stepped in dog crap, lost my bags, had to put up pictures of Atlanta even though it wasn't in Atlanta. And then for a while then I couldn't put up anything, and people were like, why are you have no stepchats for

a whole day? Why don't you have instance stories? And as watch I can post anything from the terror, So thank you very much. And that was just a little something there. And hope do you hear this and find your thing, whatever your thing is, because it's not money, it can be time. Time is more valuable money a lot of times. So I hope you find your thing, and I hope you stay consistent with your thing. I

get a priority if you can. So thank you very much, and tomorrow Karen Fair choked a little bit down about I hope that was something that you like. Okay, thank you