Hello and welcome to Big Gay Energy. I'm Caitlin. And I'm Fiora. Come along with us while we dive into the fun and nuances of queer media. Representation matters, and we're. Here to talk about it. Cheers queers. We have another special big Gay Book club episode. Today we are talking to Chloe Spencer, the talented author of Haunting Melody. Welcome to the podcast, Chloe. Hi, thanks for having me here. It's really exciting to be. We are so excited to talk to
you. I think your book has now become one of my favorite Paranormally books. It's one of my favorite things to read, so I was really glad that we got to read it. Oh, that's, that means that means the world to me. I wanted it to be like a very fun, like paranormal story that people could get into. And I, I love hearing that it's that it's connected with you. And I love hearing that it's connected with this.
A lot of readers so far. I was, I was really actually kind of surprised by that a little bit. But yeah. It's great. No, truly, you did an amazing job and in the book, one thing that we like as the Big Energy podcast is that you had a lot of representation in this book and you included it in a way that didn't make it the sole. Focus of the.
Story. So when you were crafting Haunting Melody, how did you figure out what to include to make people feel seen without, like, consuming the story? That's a really good question. I think that I was just trying to, I was trying to figure out like what these characters would be. Naturally. Cyrus was actually kind of based on somebody that they met at a lesbian bar one night who I unfortunately, she was very
lovely. I don't even remember this woman's name, but because I ran away to get tacos because I had been having a few drinks. So but like that, that particular woman that I met was a Butch woman. And so I was like, I, I remember doing a lot breeding over the past couple of years and particularly in the YA space, I was like, it doesn't feel like there's a lot of representation
for like mask and Butch people. And I'm, I'm very femme and I feel like I can speak, I, I feel like there's a lot of femme representation in sapphic literature, but I, and there's definitely like mask and Butch litter representation in literature, but I feel like it's harder to come across and harder to enter like the mainstream and everything.
So when it came to time to like sit down and write these characters, I, I knew that I could write from the experience of a femme by woman because that's that's what I am. And then when it came to, I wanted to have a Butch love interest in in the story because I thought that it was really important for kids to have that kind of representation. And then I think like from there, I really wanted to make it a very like a queer inclusive kind of little community on the
island. Because one of the things that I think that really frustrates me sometimes when I'm reading queer literature, in particular, if it's set in, like, I think that it's, it's frustrating when you like read about literature that's set in like rural communities, is that they kind of make it seem like it's very hard for queer people to thrive there or like queer people don't like exist there.
Speaking as somebody that grew up in the Midwest and people are like, there's queer culture here. And then I've also lived in the South where people are like, there's queer culture there. That's like people are still very surprised when I tell them that Atlanta is home to like one of the last like lesbian bars in the US. And so I wanted to just kind of make this as as queer as
possible. So I included the representation with Tomai. And then when it came to including other types of representation, I know that there's a polyamorous relationship that's in the story as well. And that actually is kind of more so like based on that actually is kind of more so based on these like just reflecting on some characters and another piece of media that inspired the work and kind of reimagining what that characters dynamic would have looked like.
So yeah. Yeah, when we got to that storyline, I was like. Oh, yay. 'Cause I have not, anything we've read previously has not included that. So I was so excited to finally get a book that included that. Yeah, I really loved, I've got polyamorous friends and polyamorous friends, a lot of
polyamorous friends. And so I was like, it's so weird that like we don't have a lot of representation, I think for like non normative families or like non nuclear families, even though like there's a lot of there's a lot of different types of families. And so one of the things that I thought was really cute about the book is that it has other representation of like a family that maybe just is not traditional. And I think that that's cool. It was a great addition. Yeah, definitely needed.
So thank you for that. Sorry, I had a dog issue. OK, so as I mentioned previously, paranormal supernatural books are one of my favorite things to read and they're always so different because it basically your imagination's free to create the world. So how did you develop the rules and ways of the supernatural world? Yeah, that that is an excellent question. So I think that I've always
really loved ghost stories. So I've loved things like Casper the friendly Ghost and like all those little Disney movies that came out when I was a kid. I also really loved Kendar Blakes and a Dress in Blood series. And then just a fan of like Ghostbusters. And then Danny Phantom was also another significant influence
for the book. I will that that's kind of, I think where like the polyamorous Rep came came from is because if you remember, if you remember like the show or if you know about the show at all, there's like Danny's parents and then there's like this one guy that is Vlad who is like their college friends and Vlad and Vlad has like this very like interesting relationship with them.
Like throughout the entire series where like he was kind of in love with the mom and then, you know, he was also, but he also like has a strong like relationship with the dad, even though he thinks the dad's kind of a loser. And I was like, this would be so interesting to explore and like, explore in like a healthy way where one person is not like a villain. I'm sorry, I went off on a
tangent there. So yes, so the, the other kind of representation, the other kind of influences came from things like Ghostbusters, Danny Phantom, things like that. And so when I sat down to sort of write this story, I wanted it to have a little bit of a component where it's about a girl that's sort of trying to break down her worldview or like the things that she was taught and trying to unlearn them. That's like a large part of the book.
But when I was writing it, I think I remember writing it before, like really incorporating those epigraphs that came at the beginning of each chapter. And I remember just thinking, there's a lot of lore that I want to put into this book that doesn't necessarily make sense to put in the context of the storyline. Like no one's going to sit down and necessarily explain.
One of the things that I think peeves me up like is a big pet peeve for me about like fantasy books and things like that is when there's like these long monologues about them just trying to explain something and it's like, but they already exist in this world. Why would why would we need to be explaining it? So then I realized that the epigraphs could be a really good way to kind of build in like that with the world and like those sources and things like
that. And that's like something I think that the epigraphs came to me. I, I really should think like Tiffany D Jackson, like the weight of blood because she's incorporated like in the weight of blood. If you ever read that one, it's got like podcast interviews and like transcriptions in it. How to Succeed in Witchcraft by Ashlyn Brophy also has like some of these epigraphs at the beginning.
And I was like, this is like a really excellent way to kind of build in a world and make it a very rich world without making it too dense. That's awesome. No, I agree. I love the effort like I was when I first got to the first epigraph. I was like, oh, this is intrigued because I'm like what is this tome like it? It already intrigues you because you're like, what is my first question was what is the war? What is this book mean? Like who wrote this?
And so I do like that you sprinkle that. I agree. I think that is a good way to keep the characters realistic because you're right in the world, why would they be having? It is great. Let me just briefly explain this thing. I knew my whole life, and you're right, right. Why are you telling? Me. This, you just know this. It's weird. So yeah, no, that was a great way to like it. Also kind of like keeps a bit of separation to show myself.
Like in your brain, 2 plots going on, you're like, what's the character doing? And then like, what is the bigger overarching pictures? Epigraph is a great way to do that. I love that a lot. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, I thought that it was also a really cool way in, in my mind when it comes to like the ghost hunting in the book and like the technologies that they use. Like I I kind of think that the technologies are. Am I allowed to swear on the podcast?
Oh, yes. OK. So I think that the technologies that actually a lot of the ghost hunters use are complete bullshit. And it's like a capitalistic scheme to like try to get people to invest in these things, like they succeed in getting the
ghosts in my, in my mind. And this is not explored in the, in the, the book explicitly, but in my mind, like people, like someone just made this company to sell like ghost hunting equipment to make it easier to get rid of ghosts instead of actually doing like the proper practices that the ghost hunters have been refining over like years and years and things like
that. And I was kind of, I was kind of like, how do I, I don't want like that to be necessarily illustrated in the story because there's already so much going on in the story as well. But the epigraphs there's like blinds and like conversations and things where they're kind of like Leorna Giles is sort of criticizing the use of like the equipment and things like that and trying to say that the ghost hunters are strayed from their path.
And that's not something that can fit in the book, but that I, I think that I think is something that can fit in kind of this background of, you know, Melody is trying to unlearn everything that she thinks that she knows about ghost hunting. And she's trying to challenge that because one way that she's been presented her whole life is not necessarily the right way or the only way or the correct way. But I think that it's able to do that without taking a huge focus in the story.
There was something in the beginning of the book and I think it was like either an illness disease where about something with ectoplasm like. Yes, ectitis. Yeah, yeah, ectoplasm. I don't know how I spell it, but yeah. My dumb ass thought this was a real thing and I was about to text theor and be like hey what is this and then luckily I googled it before texting theor. It's inflammation from ectoplasm.
I was like, damn, that was so clever because, yeah, like if you had, I love that because I, I work in medicine and I thought that was really clever because I'm like, yeah, if you had all these things, like you're going, people are going to have like reactions to have like diseases specific to this ghost. Honey, I love that detail. That was really a detail.
Like finally somebody did it. I was also thinking about how like ectoplasm is so wet I'm like there would be if ectoplasm was a real thing there would be so much mold. Like there is no way that like you can't convince me that someone wouldn't get sick from like working with ghosts at least at some at some point. No, for real. And I love the realism when you're like, you had like Melody walking through this house and it's just like, it's everywhere. And I was like, right, everywhere.
Like, yeah, it was very realistic. One thing I love that you did with the book, with the the ghost hunters is you kind of, you made them almost like you frame them almost as like this cultural entity versus this like job. Because a lot of times, like Ghostbusters, they're there. It's a job. They do. It's just a. Quirky job, but like they were like this.
It's almost like AI don't want to say like indigenous community, but it felt like it felt like this like really old timey, like community that's been passed on through generations and like I love that it it's a culture more so than less like a function. That was a twist. Yeah. Thank you. I wanted to. So I knew I won't spoil like who the villain was, but I knew when I sat down to write this book, when I knew I'd like, I knew the components were like ghost
music. And then the twist villain that's sort of at the and there I knew that I wanted to use like another like fantasy creature for that, but I was like it. I, I was just like, I don't think that it's going to make sense to have other fantasy creatures present in this world unless and, and just be like, well, ghost hunters are just not fantasy creature. It it, it felt like it wasn't going to vibe with like the world.
And so I was like, it would be interesting to kind of explore this from like a cultural perspective instead of just as a job, because who would want to be a ghost? I, I feel like if it's a cultural thing, more people would want to be like, feel compelled to be a ghost hunter. But if it's just a job, it's like, why would you volunteer yourself for that? Why would a lot of people, like, volunteer themselves for that? Yeah. That's that's fair. Yeah, no, definitely, definitely fair. OK.
So you you talked a little bit about like media that influenced you and crafting the book. Were there any other personal experience you had that influenced the creation of Haunting Melody? Yeah, So Haunting Melody is a book that centers on a teenage girl with PTSDI. Have PTSDI went through some very traumatic incidents like a few years, a few years back, one of which included a sexual assault, the other which included witnessing a shooting
at my apartment complex. And so these two events kind of happened in the time span of like less than six months. So it was just kind of multiple traumatic events that compounded to sort of LED, which kind of put me in this moment where I was sort of having a a breakdown. And I've had like depression and anxiety, like a lot of my life. I've, you know, I've had it since I was like in my teens.
So that was familiar to me. But PTSD was just this whole other different alienating ball game because in in some ways I felt like I was a stranger in my body. And in some ways, when you experience things like flashbacks, like I know I knew like written down, like what a flashback was. I didn't know what it was supposed to feel like. And it felt like I was being split in two, two different places at once.
And I was like, this is just such an alienating like disease to I I well, disorder, I should say. It's a disorder to live with and it's very, it changes your life in ways that I think that you you don't necessarily expect. Like I still can't necessarily like listen to. I live right next to a baseball stadium, which sometimes sets off fireworks. Sometimes I'm having flashbacks when there's fireworks going off. And I like I've never, it doesn't happen all the time now,
thank goodness. But I haven't gotten to a point where I feel, I guess there's this, there's this idea that PTSD is supposed to go away after a certain amount of time and not, that's not the case. Like it does get easier to manage in time. And so I was like, I'm not the only person in the world that has PTSD. Like it's actually it's a very, very common disorder to have. And I think that it's very easy to develop it.
So I think that with the the with that, I was like, there's got to be some kids out there in the world that maybe have PTSD that would mean to like see some kind of blueprint for what life looks like after developing this disorder. Because I remember being afraid to leave my house. I remember thinking nothing was ever going to be OK again.
And it was. I just had to put in a lot of work to do it. So I think that that's one major thing that that's like one major thing that's definitely influenced this book is that I wanted it to be more about sort of the recovery and like life after what that looks like. Because I think that when you first get diagnosed with the disorder, like you feel a deep, deep sense of hopelessness.
I'm. I'm very grateful that you're willing to share your personal story and that you have dealt with this in your art, basically. I. Have all of the above that you've talked about and poor Theora has to deal with my PTSD because a car accident. She has to play watch media for me sometimes because I'm like is there a car? She's like, stop, there's no car accidents in. There. But yeah, so it's just I love when people take pain and just that that really is what art is
about. Yeah. Was there a particular moment in Haunting Melody that felt cathartic or healing for you to write, given your personal experiences with trauma? Yeah, I think that what felt cathartic for me to write was definitely that kind of conversation that she and Cyrus have in like that little, like, Playhouse that's like out in the woods behind some behind, like Tomei's house. I think that that particular sort of moment is where she's just having this meltdown.
And she's just like, I can't get, I can't get my shit together. Like no matter what I do, I can't, I can't get it together. Like there's just going to be some part of my brain that is forever changed. There's some parts of my body that are forever changed. And I feel like she feels, I feel like with PTSD, there's a sense of like a loss of control. And with her, I think that it's, it's I, I think that what was cathartic for me is that she kind of tells all these things to Cyrus.
She kind of like dumps all this information on Cyrus. And Cyrus is this person that just like embraces all of these anxieties, like let's her get the matter of her system and then just kind of says, like, we have good bodies. We have good brains. That I think was really important for me in particular because I was just like, wow, my brain is broken. My body is never going to be the same. My brain is never going to be the same again. My body is never going to be the
same again. And yeah, maybe it's never going to be the same again. But it doesn't mean that it's broken. And it doesn't mean that I'm undeserving of love or that I can't move forward. It just might mean that I need some like more help sometimes And like remember the tools that I was given by like the therapist that I've spent time with. I I love all of that. Everything that you're saying is just so beautiful. And I love that. Thank you. You're able to communicate that
through this book. And I'm sure that people reading it, it's going to resonate with them if they've had these experiences well. But even for people who haven't, it's just really good reminder that there are people with experiences like that who may need a little guidance or understanding. Yeah. Yeah, I think that I think with PTSD, I think it's easy for people to get into this mindset of why can't someone get over it? And it's like your brain is
chemically changed. Like your brain has been biologic. Like you can't you, you can't like change it back. And it's an adjustment to try to figure out how it works. I know especially like when it comes to triggers, like I start to get triggered by very like random things. Like for me, I can watch gun violence on on television and a movie and I'm fine if I. Like hear a banging noise and I don't see where it's coming from. I'm not fine.
Which I'm like, that feels a little ridiculous, but I'm like, that's just how my brain works now. So yeah. Well, there's kind of like a little bit of unknown, like you can see exactly what's happening, but if you don't know where it is. Right. If you don't know where it is. And in that particular situation, I did not know what was going on until like I looked outside and I saw what was going on. So like that that I guess was just kind of something that was interesting for me to discover.
And I think that like Melody kind of discovers like small things throughout the book that like tend to trigger her and then she's like learning to adapt with that as well. Like if Cyrus tries to touch her, she gets a little overwhelmed. If she hears certain sounds, I think she also gets like a little bit overwhelmed. So I think that like triggers sometimes just aren't like the obvious things that you would think of. I think sometimes they're very small and like subtle.
And then also like there's a common thing of like, only soldiers get PTSD. Yes, yeah. Then that just is not the that's not, that's not true. I know a lot of people who have PTSD from like I know people who have PTSD from sexual assaults. I think it's very common to develop a PTSD after sexual assaults. I think it's also very common to develop.
There's also things like CPTSDI have a friend who does have CPTSD, like complex because it's compounded like in childhood, it's just like constant traumatic events that eventually just kind of change the landscape, I guess the landscape of your brain. And like, there are a lot of things that can actually cause PTSD, which is why I was kind of like, it's interesting that we don't talk a lot explicitly about PTSD. We talk about trauma in fiction,
but not explicitly PTSD. And it's, it's very common. And like a lot of, you know, different things can happen to thing, a bunch of different things can happen to kind of 'cause it, which I I think is like less known for sure. Yeah, you, so you mentioned that basically that you thought it was important to show somebody as a protagonist who's recovering from PTC versus like a character that's actively experiencing the trauma, which is much more common.
So how did that with that in mind, how did that alter your approach to like writing the story? Yeah. So I would say that with Monster Sona, which is the previous work that I've released with Tiny Ghost Press and that was my previous YA work, Monster Sona was largely edited during the time that I was like first initially diagnosed. So that book, as I was like kind of learning to like edit it, edit it and like go through it again, I realized that it was a book that was kind of about the
onset of PTSD. And so with Monster Sona kind of being a book that was about the onset of PTSD, as I was editing it and going through therapy, going through therapy prior to the release of that book, I started to kind of learn different sort of techniques and sort of to kind of like adjust and like get my mental state back to a better place. And that's how I was able to kind of write Haunting Melody.
So like the difference between the two books is definitely very stark because Monster Sona is very dark. It's very foreboding. There's not like a lot of there's not necessarily like a lot of hope in that book. And this book, I wanted it to definitely be like a little bit more optimistic and opposite in tone. So one of the things that I knew when I wrote Haunting Melody is that while Monster Sona is sci-fi horror, I wanted a Haunting Melody to be more about a more optimistic and happy.
I wanted to kind of feel like a Disney Channel original movie. It's just that this one person has, this one person just has this disorder, and she's got to learn how to work with that. So I think that if I hadn't written Monster Sona, I would have really struggled at writing Haunting Melody. But because I knew where I'd taken things with Monster Sona, which centered on that onset, I was able to kind of separate those things out and figure out what I needed to change in this
book. What things I needed to kind of keep consistent in terms of like side effects, symptoms, things like that, but what things I needed to change? So Disney Channel Original movie if they tackled mental health in a healthy manner. Yes, exactly. Yes. I wanted it to feel like Halloween Town, kind of. Yeah. So love Gravity Falls. Gravity Falls is like one of my favorite shows. I don't have any artwork from Gravity Falls on my wall behind me, which is unfortunate, and I
need to fix that. But Gravity Fall, like I wanted it to kind of feel like Gravity Falls, just like with queer
characters. So I wanted it to be creepy and definitely have the sense of dread and like definitely to fear because one of the things that I think Gravity Falls did really well for kids is like scaring them, but also giving them the sense of hope at the end of the episode that everything's going to be OK. So that that definitely that definitely that was also like another like huge influence that I think went into developing the book in terms of trying to
balance the scary but balance the funny. Yeah, in the book, music plays a large role, and I noticed that you usually create playlists for readers to listen to while reading your books. Yes. If you had to pick one song to be like a theme song for haunting melody, what would it be? Oh my gosh, do you mind if I pull up the playlist real quick
to just get it? OK, yes, because a part of me wants to say beach bunnies weeds because that is literally just the song is about somebody who has like anxiety or has like a really big self like problem with their self-image. But I feel like that's not necessarily as hopeful or as let me see. OK, OK, yes.
The theme song that I would use for haunting melody would definitely be Caroline Plotchek's Welcome to My Island 'cause I think that it's about there's there's a lyric that she says where she says welcome to my island. Hope you like, Hope you like me. You're not. Oh gosh, what is the lyric? Let me see here. Welcome to my island. Let me see. Hope you like me. You ain't leaving. And then it kind of talks about desire. And there's like a lot of other lyrics that kind of pertain to
desire. And I was like, I think it's really funny that I was able to find, like, this song that sort of connected to the idea of arriving on an island and kind of starting fresh, which a lot of the book is about starting fresh and trying to start anew. But then there's also like, a huge component about desire as Melody Kennett grapples with her feelings for Cyrus. So that I think is what I would say is the theme song. It's amazing how music can like perfectly describe a piece of media.
Side note, I noticed in another playlist you have you had 7 by Taylor Swift. So are you a Swifty at all? I am a little bit of a Swifty, admittedly, I, I'm not a big fan of her like the I'm not a big fan of like the last two albums that she put out, but I really love folklore and folklore was definitely one of like folklore is like one of these comfort albums for me that I revisit. But I've been a lifelong Taylor
Swift fan. I went to like the Speak Now concert when I was a kid and that that was a very cool concert. Yeah, for sure. Sounds awesome. We relate a bunch of Taylor Swift songs to media, so I just had to bring it up. Yeah, 7 is just such a really good way. Good one to like, like kind of tie back to like work that I've written. I think that that one, I'm going to say that one was on the Monster Sona playlist.
And then OK, OK, yeah. And then my tears Ricochet is another one that I really, really love and that hasn't influenced like Haunting Melody or anything, but it's influenced like a lot of other works that I've written, like the idea of if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake cursing my name, wishing I'd stayed. And I think that that's a really excellent song to kind of illustrate like, like a breakup and things like that, that I, I go back to that one all the time. I love that one.
Awesome. Yeah, it's a perfect one for paranormal stuff. Yes, it's good. Yeah. All right, so back to the book. Melody's goal to redeem herself after her failed hunt is this central theme, something she beats herself up about quite a bit. How did you explore the idea of self worth and redemption, and how does Melody's journey mirror that of someone in recovery? That's OK. Those that's a really excellent question.
I think that I knew I wanted her to kind of be this person that was very despite the things that she's been that she's been through. I wanted her to be extremely driven and kind of like desperate almost in a way to like get through this particular to to get to the bottom of this particular mystery. Because I think that there are little things that we do sometimes when we're trying to recover from a mental illness or trying to like, I guess reframe
our way of thinking. We kind of pick like one thing that we can sort of focus on as like a central goal. Maybe for some people it's like being able to leave their house. Maybe for some people, it's like, I want to be able to watch this violent movie without it, like without me needing to turn it off. Or maybe it's I want to be able to go to this place again where this really bad thing happened and like have a good time. And for.
So thinking about that and then thinking about Melody and how she, I think is tying the idea of solving this mystery as a way to go back to who she was in the beginning as a way to kind of prove that she is the same girl that her everyone always thought that she was. And I think that that is kind of what adds in this sense of desperation and ambition for
her. As she kind of progresses throughout the book, though, it sort of becomes clear that maybe in some ways, like she's not necessarily ready to take on like solving a mystery all by herself, especially when she's never solved a mystery before. She's she's bold in that way. I love, love the confidence, girly, but what are you thinking? Like, I don't know, I don't
know. So like there are some things that I think if you're really excited about recovery or you're just like, I need, I need this to be over. I need this to be over and I need to go back to how my life was before. There are times where I think you're going to challenge yourself in ways where that's not necessarily like, healthy or like the best thing to do. And you know, you're gonna push yourself really way too hard and it's going to actually like backfire on you.
Like she has instances where she's kind of like having. She has instances where she's kind of like having, I guess. I guess the word for it would be like a little bit of like a meltdown or like a panic attack, things like that, where it's it's she's kind of going backwards. So I think in some ways like her journey is like about taking those setbacks and and things like that. But then, you know, you have the involvement of Cyrus.
Cyrus who is despite understanding that there's like a murder mystery going on and that some of it's been pinned on her. Cyrus, I think, is so patient and has like, almost better sort of skills to kind of cope with stress. So Cyrus is the one that sort of steps in to encourage her to like, hey, you should probably, like, eat breakfast this morning before you leave the house. Like, we wouldn't want anything bad to happen to you. Like, nothing's going to get solved any faster because you
decided to skip breakfast. You're just going to pass out. And Cyrus is the one that kind of encourages her to calm down and like take a deep breath and like take a moment and really slow down. So I think that that's kind of how the idea of like self, like the, the idea of the redemption
is kind of explored. And that in terms of the self worth, I think that with the self worth, she kind of gets to the end of the story and realizes that, oh, like my family loves me. They're just concerned about me. And they were just trying to like they, they, they were the ones that messed up in this particular, in this particular book, they were the ones that messed up and they were just trying to protect me. And they are human and they make mistakes and they fuck up quite a bit.
And they're not skilled with words. Melody's dad especially is not skilled with words. So I think she gets to this point where like she realizes that self worth is just something that you have to work on, that people in her life still love and support her, and that she didn't need to solve like this murder mystery necessarily to redeem herself in that sense. That, that makes total sense. And again, I just love it. You have created such a beautiful book. Thank you. Thank you.
I that really means a lot to me because this is just Yeah. I mean, you never, you never know how people are gonna respond to things with like I think especially with like femmes that are kind of coping, coping with like chronic illness
or like mental illness. Like sometimes I'll see reviews for like not my books, but like other books where it's like this particular, this person is so annoying and I'm like, this person literally has a mental I, I would be a little bit nicer, but like this person has a mental disorder. I think that you need to give them some grace and some patience because that's what the story is trying to explore.
So you always just, I think that when I sit down to write stories about characters who have like a mental illness or like a disorder that they're coping with, like there's always this thing in the back of my head where I worry someone's going to think that this person's annoying someone's what if they're not going to get it? And I'm just really excited to
see that. Like there's people that get it and people that connect with it and people that understand, 'cause that's, that's so important for somebody that is struggling with mental illness. Even if they don't get it, it's still making them feel something. Yes, yes, that is true. That is true. Yeah. Even if, even if, I guess even if you come away from the book feeling like you don't necessarily understand everything that happened.
Maybe it's thinking, making you like, think about things a little bit better. There are still a lot of people that might have that melody mindset where it's like, all I need to do is just do it and then I can get through it and it's going to be fine. And it's like, no, that's not, that's not how this works. So you're actually, you're probably going to make things worse.
So yeah, I think that that's definitely I, I, I hope that for people who can't connect to it or relate to it, that it pushes them to a point of understanding or wanting to understand and explore these things more. So we do have two spoilery questions if you're OK. With that, I'm so excited, yes. OK, so for anybody who has not read the book yet, go forward like 10:00-ish minutes, or go read the book and then come
back. Either way, if Hunting Melody were turned into an interactive experience like a video game or Choose your own Adventure, which decision point in the story would you let readers change and why? Oh, gosh, the decision point in the story that I would let readers change and why? I think, gosh, that's a really good question. I think that a decision point and if I was to like remake it in a way where like it could have like a branching narrative and it could have like multiple
different endings kind of thing. I think that actually it could be interesting to have Melody decide maybe not to work with Cyrus. I think that that could be an interesting way to explore because it is kind of presented to her as like this choice. So like choice whether or not like to work with the ghost or not. It could I think be interesting if Melody maybe worked less with ghosts and worked more with like Tamaya and trying to solve the
to solve the the mystery. I think that that could be an interesting place to to go, go to, yeah. That would change the entire story. Right. Yeah. It would change the entire story for sure. And then I think that there's always going to be this idea that Cyrus, I think that there would always be the sense of mystery about Cyrus as you're trying to connect things.
I also think that maybe another change I could make is maybe Melody and Cyrus don't leave the theater when they realize that Cyrus might be like getting set up to like take the fall for
them. I think it could be interesting if instead of like they double back to Melody's house, maybe they go somewhere else trying to be like a little bit more remote, which I think could be a Dumber decision in some ways because it's like you have to like, I don't even know, like then Melody would just be reported as a runaway. But I think that that could be another interesting way to sort
of explore things. If Melody like ran away from home with Cyrus to try to avoid detection and things like that, she was like, no, Simon's going to figure this out. I I got to go. Yeah, just leave all the resources behind. Just. Yeah, just leave all the. Resources behind that's the hard mode. That's the hard mode ending. Extra special challenge mode. You get the extra special ending or or something, you unlock a special ending.
Well, Speaking of the ending. So at the end of the book, Simon makes something that reverses Cyrus's transition into becoming a Wraith. I'm curious, is this something she can use indefinitely, or will they have to deal with the inevitability of losing each other at some point? That's a really good question. So if haunting Melody ever gets a sequels are dependent upon like sales is I'm just I'm just going to say, like publishing as business sequels are dependent
upon sales. But I have given a lot of thought to this because one of the concerns that I think I have with Cyrus and Melody staying together is that Melody is going to age and Cyrus is not going to age because Cyrus is stuck at
this. What I was thinking is that they would be if, if I had a sequel in mind, I would want them to maybe go to the mainland, check out some colleges and things like that and maybe form relationships with other mediums who can teach Melody kind of more about the old ways in ways that Simon doesn't necessarily understand. I think that there could be other kind of like potions or selves or devices that they could use that could kind of
help Cyrus like age in a way. But I also think that the idea of necromancy could be really interesting to explore or like recreating some, some kind of like temporary body or like vessel that she can use. I think that there's like a, a couple of different ways that like you can explore it and a a couple different ways that you can challenge it.
So I, I definitely think that when it comes to the South, like the South is going to stop working at a certain point or she's just going to need to explore different and more kinds of things. For sure. Yeah, agreed. Yeah, I do have another question. That I just thought of, and I don't know if I just missed something, but I believe that ghost hunters are special in the way that they can see ghosts and like other people can't. Right.
Yes. Yeah. So if if a ghost has the decision if a ghost has the ability to. Ghosts generally have an ability to like, hide themselves, but hunters have, I guess this, I think I explained it as like being able to see like a certain like light wavelength that ghosts occupy or something that regular humans can't. Yeah. OK, so Cyrus just wants. To be seen like it's only Yeah, Cyrus. Got it. Cyrus wants to be seen. Yeah.
Cyrus wants to be seen. And I think that even Cyrus, like, even I think like struggles to. They do turn invisible at one point in the book, like her and Melody together. But I think that even there's a struggle to kind of maintain that invisibility for sure. Yeah, got it. Thank you. Yeah, no worries. Yeah. That that was actually a very confused, that that confused us like a couple times because we forgot that that was like one of the the plot points for the ghost hunters.
And like, especially with the invisibility scene, I'm going to be honest. Like me and my editor went back and forth on like that to try to like, make it less confusing and like, try to understand it because, yeah, that that that's, that's, that was an interesting kind of caveat about sort of designing the world out with the ghost hunters and the ghosts. Yeah, especially. With melody, not melody. Cyrus. Like, joining the world, basically. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.
OK, so that concludes the spoilery stuff. It is now safe to return. If you are listening to this anyway, I noticed that you are also a filmmaker. Yeah, yeah. Any hopes to one day? Turn Melody's story into a film. I I hope so.
I really hope that someone I would I think that it can make like a cute animated series if it was just like about about like these teenage kids on like this on the island, like or hopping like over to the mainland to try to solve like different figure out like how to get ghosts to crossover, trying to like unlearn like ghost hunting practices and things like that and like learn new techniques. I would love for it to be like ATV series. I would love for it to be a film.
I really think Disney Channel would be great, but I know that they have been a little bit little bit homophobic as of late given like the decisions that they've made to like axe the owl House and thing things like that. I think that they've like axed a lot of their like their queer media in general, which is just kind of ridiculous to me because that seems to be the things that people want to see.
And the I could, I could go on. I could go on for like another 30 minutes alone on the Owl House cancellation and how mad that still makes me. But I will not. I will not. But yeah, I think that there could definitely, I would, I I would love to sit down and maybe like write a film script for it at the at this point. But right now I kind of want the book to just get out in the world and sort of look at things, sort of get more feedback from audiences and things like that.
Because sometimes I think with like film and like TV adaptations, people want it to be like a, a play by play of like the actual book, which I think is fine. But I personally like to look at my work and see how I would change it to screen. And maybe that means taking like some create different creative choices. Like right now I'm working on a script for like a separate like
adult body horror novella. And there's definitely going to be some things that deviate from the original plot just to kind of support like a film structure better. Yeah, that makes sense. All right, Related but not related. If the characters in your book could meet the characters in a queer TV show and interact in the show's world, which show would you choose? Oh my gosh. I now that I said the Owl House, I know it's going to be the only thing that's stuck in my head.
I think that they would love the Owl House. They would they would love to meet the kids from the Owl House and I think that they would have a really great time together. I think that it would be really cool to kind of see how the Owl House's like version of magic might contrast from like haunting Melody's idea of like magic because there are witches in Haunting Melody. They're just not like no one. None of the main characters are a witch.
They're they're just kind of like mentioned in passing. So I think that could be very cool for sure. Have you ever? Watched Yellow Jackets. Yes, yes, I. Love yellow jackets. Yeah, well, I feel like if. These two worlds collide. That would make one hell of a show. Oh my God, that. Could be so scary. I can't wait for the next season of Yellow Jackets. I love yellow jackets. Oh, my God. So good. So good. Yeah, that could be so. That could be so fun to see.
Cannibalism and then lost in the woods, learning how to survive. I feel like Tom, I would really struggle out there in the wilderness. I feel like Melody might be like, oh, this is nice. I get to be one with nature again. Cyrus would probably be indifferent until my would be like, I'm dying here. I'm struggling. But then also. They could bring back all the people who's died in yellow jackets and they can, like, communicate what's happened. Yeah. That could be cool.
Yeah. Melody's just like so this, this person did this, that person did that. Don't trust Misty. Yeah. Bottom line, don't trust Misty. Don't. Trust Misty spoiler that that that reveals. That one made me mad. I hope that I I'm really interested to see if they ever figured out that it was Missy that destroyed that. I know I I don't. Know I will cut out the spoiler stuff for. Yellow jackets, don't worry. I just, we need to, we just need
to talk. No literally though I was just like how are how are they still even talking to her like years later? I don't even, it's fine. It's when we get to it, we're it's going to be so much talking about it. Anyway, back to the book. Our last question is. What do you hope? People take away from reading this book.
That's a really good question. I think that what I hope people take away from reading the book is that I think you need to have patience with other people and understand what they're going
through. And that I think is for the people that like don't have PTSD, the people that don't have PTSDI just want them to like be patient and learn something and maybe like take something with them and understand that like some people have like these individual struggles that they're going through that you might not necessarily know a lot
about. And then when it comes to like people who do have PTSDI do want them to understand that like your life might be changed, but just because it's changed doesn't mean that it's ruined. Doesn't mean that like there's not something small that you can put together to kind of get through to, to kind of get through your day-to-day and also
improve upon your life. I think that one of the things is you might feel like very afraid and very scared to confront the world and maybe there's just some things that you're not going to be able to do again or that you don't want to do again. And that's OK. Like it's OK for things to change. You can still just kind of build a beautiful life with like the what you have. Your world hasn't shrunk. It can grow. It's just going to grow in different ways. That that's so beautiful.
Thank you. Yes, well, thank. You, Chloe, this is This concludes the interview. We appreciate you taking the time to come talk to us today so we can get to know you. Our listeners could get to know you before we officially sign off. Is there any words of wisdom you'd like to leave the audience with? Oh. Yes, there is an environmental component to this book that I don't think but I didn't really take the chance to discuss. But I would just say recycle, reduce, reuse, recycle and try
to explore greener options. Try to take try to find ways to take care of your community, even if it's small and not very time consuming. Find ways to take care of your community that is OK calling it a. Beautification committee, even though it's actually an Environmental Protection they. Can't use the word climate change, right? No, exactly. Language matters. Indeed. That's a great way to end this. All right. All right. Thank you, Chloe.
For everybody listening at home, please check out Haunting Melody. How can people connect with you on the Internet if they want to follow you or support you? Chloe Yeah, I think that the best way. To to. Kind of follow me is by going to [email protected]. I think that you can also follow me on Instagram and TikTok where I'm at it's hey it's Chloe Spencer I'm on Twitter too, but not as active on Twitter.
Loki might delete my Twitter, not sure kind of thinking it over, but yeah Instagram TikTok at hey, it's Chloe Spencer all right you've. Heard it here everyone. So until next time I drink for lesbian Jesus and get it up all over. The place bye. And with that, we've been big. Gay Energy, thank you for listening. We'd really appreciate it if you downloaded this episode and left us a review, no matter how brief your contribution will. Help us reach a wider.
Audience we would love to hear. From you about everything and anything. You can find us on all social media platforms at Big Gay Energy Pod or e-mail us at Big Gay Energy [email protected]. Join our Discord server to. Connect with us and our friends who also love queer media. The link to join. Is in our episode. Description below if you'd like to. Support us, check out our merch store on Big gayenergypod.com or join our Patreon for early access to episodes, exclusive
content and so much more. Until next time. Hydrate from lesbian. Jesus and get it up all over the place.