Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Intimacy - podcast cover

Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Intimacy

Emily & Johnny Spigelmire | Christian Marriage Recovery Coachesbeyondbrokenvows.com
***Top 1.5% Global Podcast*** Dear Betrayed, Are you in shock? Confused, devastated, hurt, angry and feeling like you are not enough? Do you feel like it must be your fault, like you should have somehow seen the signs? Are you grieving the death of the marriage you thought you had? Dear Betrayer, Have you been believing the lie that if people knew what was really in your heart and mind, they would turn their back on you? Have you been convinced that your wife and family would leave you and you would lose everything if/when you came clean? Beloved, do you both feel like your marriage is over? Well, you’re right. That marriage full of secrets and lies IS over. But now there is hope for an honest and transparent marriage - one full of trust, safety, connection, forgiveness, acceptance, and intimacy that you’ve never known before. Bold statement, right? You may be thinking, “No way!” That’s okay. We understand… Hi, we are Johnny and Emily Spigelmire and we have been where you are... As a result of adultery fueled by pornography, the marriage vows we had exchanged as starry-eyed newlyweds and had worked so hard to keep were eventually shattered. We’ve been through hell and back. But we are here, together, to let you know that this devastation we experienced was actually a gift. Of course, we didn’t see it that way at first and you probably don’t either. But, through a commitment to recovery, our faith in God, and our hope for redemption, we set out on a journey of healing, and we can’t wait to share what we’ve learned with you. We now have a marriage that continually blows our minds, and we give God all the glory! So, if you’re ready to move from heartbreak and pain to hope and healing, grab your favorite beverage, get comfy, and join us on a journey of faith as we talk through difficult questions like; Is there hope for our marriage? Can I fix all the damage I’ve done? Can I ever trust again? Is true intimacy even possible? We will also do deep dives into the topics of: * Isolation * Guilt and Shame * Anger * Rejection * Addiction * Trauma * Body Image * Triggers * Communication * And more… Our story, like yours, is a messy one. But, with God’s help, it is possible to recover what was lost, stolen, or given away. We know this because God has turned the ashes of our lives into something beautiful and we believe he can do that for you too. You can connect with us at: support@beyondbrokenvows.com https://insider.beyondbrokenvows.com/ https://coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com/ We would love to be part of your journey to healing and wholeness!
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Episodes

21 | Breaking Free: How To Escape the Grip of Porn Addiction with Emmanuel and Bekah Guarino

The prevalence of sexually explicit content continues to surge, becoming increasingly accessible with each passing day. Who's it hurting? A better question might be, who isn't it hurting? Pornography affects everyone from innocent children to grandparents and there’s really no escaping it in our culture today. So, what can we do? Today we are sharing a discussion we had with a young couple who experienced the devastation of pornography use in their marriage. But, they didn’t let it destroy them....

Oct 02, 202336 min

20 | From Porn Queen To Child of God Now On Mission To Help Others Find Freedom with Elizabeth Spraggins

Hey Friend, Have you ever been curious about the untold stories of those in the adult entertainment industry? Do you question the authenticity of what you've heard about or witnessed on the screen? We've recently been talking a lot about the harmful impact of pornography on consumers and their loved ones, but only briefly explored the profound effects it has on those who take center stage. Today, prepare to be captivated as we engage in a compelling conversation with Elizabeth Spraggins, a remar...

Sep 25, 202355 min

19 | Feeling Like I’m Not Enough: How Comparison Can Distort Self-Identity

As a fallen human race, we tend to compare ourselves to others in many ways, the way people look, what kind of clothes they wear or car they drive, what job they have or what kind of house and neighborhood they live in. This comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy or pridefulness. I imagine most, if not all of us, have or have had some degree of comparison working against us in how we feel about ourselves. Today we are going to explore the feeling of not being enough and how the destructiv...

Sep 18, 202345 min

18 | Feeling Like I’m Not Enough. What If Pornography Is Not My True Addiction?

In our marriages when there is sexual betrayal fueled by pornography use or addiction, it is easy to only focus on the outward behaviors because they are so painful and destructive. But what if there is something deeper under the surface that you are unaware of? What if the addiction was only the evidence of an underlying problem. Would you be willing to explore the possibility? I’m a recovering sex addict with over 4 years of sobriety and I’m grateful that I discovered that there was something ...

Sep 11, 202332 min

17 | Is My Spouse A Porn Addict? 13 Clues To Help Expose Compulsive Sexual Behavior

As the wife of a recovering addict, I’ve learned that there were clues displayed by my husband that pointed to addictive behavior. I was aware of his periodic pornography use but didn’t put it together with these behavioral clues to realize that there might be a serious issue. Now that we have been working on our recovery for several years, I have discovered what I either missed or ignored as signs of a porn addiction. We are going to share some information with you today that I wished I had kno...

Sep 04, 202341 min

16 | ”It’s Just Porn, What’s The Big Deal?” And 4 Other Lies We Tell Ourselves To Justify Viewing Pornography

If pornography is no big deal, why are so many marriages destroyed by it? If pornography is harmless, why are so many people around the world hurt by it? If pornography is no big deal, why do we hide it from our wives? If pornography is harmless, why do we hide it from our children? How much do you know about porn and the pornography industry? I didn’t know much about it when I got married and I didn’t really want to. I thought it was something non-believers did. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to ...

Aug 28, 202330 min

15 | Giving Bad News? 6 Things We Said While Confessing Adultery In Our Marriage

Have you ever told someone something you knew they were not going to want to hear? Do you have something you need to tell someone and are terrified about how they will react? Are you afraid to say it because it could cause them significant pain and/or jeopardize your relationship with them? These are very natural emotions that come with telling difficult news. This was our predicament when we made the decision to tell some people about the reality of infidelity in our marriage. Today we will sha...

Aug 21, 202330 min

14 | To Tell Or Not To Tell: 3 Things We Did Right (And 1 Thing We Didn’t) When Deciding Who Needs To Know Our Infidelity Story

Your marriage has suffered a massive blow of betrayal. Adultery through pornography and/or extra-marital relationships has been discovered. You both want to save the marriage, if possible, by working on reconciliation and recovery. But now you’re wondering if you need to tell anyone or if you should just keep it private and work on it together. We went through this same scenario and today we are going to let you peek inside our marriage and the devastation we experienced through infidelity to se...

Aug 14, 202332 min

13 | His Triggers, Her Triggers – 4 Steps For Dealing With Triggers While Healing From Infidelity

Triggers, what are they and how do they affect us? Triggers come without warning and without our permission. Today we’re going to dissect the ways we are triggered and how we should handle them, so they are not destructive, but rather an opportunity for healing, connection and growth. And good heavens, do they ever stop? Grab your favorite beverage and buckle up as we talk about triggers. We pray this blesses you, Johnny and Emily 💜Work with us! coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond B...

Aug 07, 202335 min

12 | His Adultery Shattered My Reality. How Do I Know What’s Real?

What actually happens to a person who has experienced betrayal? What happens in the mind of one who has their reality shattered in an instant? Today we’re going to be discussing the effects of this type of mental and emotional injury when someone is betrayed. We’ll be sharing with you how this affected us after Johnny’s confession of adultery through pornography use and extra-marital relationships and how we sorted through the reality that our marriage was not what Emily thought it was. We’ll al...

Jul 31, 202345 min

11 | Freedom and Healing: 4 Keys to Unlocking Forgiveness After Sexual Betrayal

Do you find it hard to forgive someone who has hurt you deeply? On our show today, we’re going to unpack 4 keys to unlocking forgiveness. This method is simple, but it’s definitely not easy. So how do we get through this difficult process? We will share with you how this approach played out in our marriage after porn-fueled infidelity and where we turned for help. Grab your favorite beverage and spend some time with us as we delve deeper into the topic of forgiveness. We pray this blesses you, J...

Jul 24, 202338 min

10 | When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology

Do you appreciate getting an apology? Do you have a hard time extending one? Do you even know what a good apology looks like? Join us today as we cover the 8 steps to a healing apology, which is so helpful in a marriage, especially when there has been some form of betrayal. We have experienced the power of this healing apology in our own marriage after the discovery and disclosure of pornography use that escalated into infidelity. Giving an apology the wrong way can be even more hurtful than not...

Jul 17, 202341 min

09 | I’m So Angry! How I Overcame Anger from Sexual Betrayal in 3 Simple But Not Easy Steps

Do you get angry while driving in traffic? Have you ever had or seen road rage? Are you the person that yells at everyone making stupid and even dangerous driving mistakes from inside your car with the windows up? I can’t say I’ve never had a burst of anger when driving, but in recent years I have made it a practice to try and give other drivers the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they have an emergency, maybe their kids are distracting them... And it also helps to remind myself that I have probably...

Jul 10, 202342 min

08 | 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 2)

When you think of the word honesty, do you view it in black and white or on a sliding scale? Those who see it in black and white might argue that a person either tells the truth or they don’t. Those who prefer a sliding scale approach may categorize white lies at a 1-2, lies of omission at a 4-5, but a deceptive or premeditated lie at 9-10. Honesty, in this person’s mind, is relative. In our show today, we’re going to talk about rigorous honesty. We were first introduced to this concept through ...

Jul 03, 202329 min

07 | 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 1)

Did you know that there is more than one way to lie? A lack of honesty can leave others in your life on uncertain ground. How do we overcome this deceptive practice and what is the key to complete honesty? Spend the next half hour with us as we talk about 5 different ways we lie to each other, how lying affects our relationships and what we can do to change it forever. We will also be sharing some details from our sometimes painful journey to find freedom from the lies that plagued our marriage....

Jun 26, 202333 min

06 | Setting Boundaries After Sexual Betrayal in Marriage

Have you ever stopped to think about the significance of boundaries? What kind of feelings or emotions do you think of when you hear that term? Does it bring to mind negative connotations or a sense of being confined and restricted? Perhaps it even feels punitive or unfair. It's understandable to have these reactions, but let's take a moment to consider a different perspective. What if boundaries could actually be beneficial for all parties involved? In today's episode, we're going to unpack the...

Jun 19, 202347 min

05 | The Effects of Infidelity and How We Made the Decision to Stay Married After Sexual Betrayal

The decision to stay married after sexual betrayal is a very difficult one to navigate. We understand this because the effects of infidelity shook each of us to our core. If you've been listening to our show you know we are still married, but we didn’t go through this on our own. We had an incredible amount of support and guidance along the way. In this episode we're going to open up about the personal effects that infidelity had on each of us while shedding light on the reasons behind our mutua...

Jun 12, 202329 min

04 | Sharing Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery

Hi Friend, In today's episode we will be telling a quick version of our love story from how we met and got married up to the day of Johnny's confession of adultery that we call Discovery Day. If you haven't heard our story as told by each of us from our own perspectives, you can listen to Emily's story in Episode 2 and Johnny's story in Episode 3. We are telling our story together today to help you understand that we are ordinary people who love Jesus, but how the Enemy was able to wreak havoc i...

Jun 05, 202320 min

03 | His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values

Hi Friend, On today's episode, Johnny tells his story of how a young boy with hopes and dreams for a wonderful future ends up confessing to his wife of 31 years that he is a sex addict and an adulterer. His painful story is tragic, but also beautiful because he knows the One who makes a way when there is no way. Jesus can make something beautiful out of the ashes of our lives if we let him. We pray this episode blesses you! Johnny and Emily 💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching c...

May 29, 202345 min

02 | Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me

Hi Friend, Today Emily is baring her soul to tell the story of her husband's marital infidelity fueled by pornography use. And although it was Not Her Fault in any way, she is not perfect and you will hear some of the ways she fell short in her life too. But, God is bigger than any failure, heartbreak or trauma. He is the redeemer of the lost and the comforter of the broken-hearted. We pray this episode blesses you! Emily and Johnny 💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching....

May 29, 202325 min

01 | ”Why Are We Talking About Betrayal?” A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer

Hello Friends! This is our very first show on the Beyond Broken Vows podcast. Today we are telling you a little bit about us, what you will hear in this podcast, what you won't hear in this podcast, and our goal for sharing our personal story with you. Topics like betrayal, infidelity, and pornography addiction are difficult for many people to talk about, especially for those being affected in some way by them. We have definitely been through all of these, but we are also enjoying the blessings ...

May 29, 202315 min

Trailer/Beyond Broken Vows Podcast

Have you been devastated by marital infidelity fueled by pornography? We've been there too and have traveled a difficult yet victorious road to reconciliation and recovery. We believe that any couple who is willing to completely surrender to God can not only get through it but also experience a marriage made new and better than ever before! Listen on YouTube https://youtu.be/qH9y_fIZ6zw

May 29, 20233 min
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