Human Design for Parents and Partners with Erin Claire Jones

Music. This is belonging a podcast that explores being alive in the age of loneliness I'm your host Becca piastrelli, a writer mother and Community tender currently living on the ancestral lands of the Coast Miwok people in present-day Marin County California. In this show we explore topics like Rites of Passage cultivating meaningful community. Seasonal and cyclical living and what it means to be a good ancestor in these times.

I have thought-provoking conversations with friends teachers elders and ancestral medicine Keepers to help support you in bringing more meaning and connection to your life. I also pop in here and there to share updates and learnings from my own story because we were meant to do this together cosmically holding hands as we walk the spiral of life. You can expect to be challenged by New or Old ideas face your beliefs and what systems informed them.

Curious and brave to tell the truth about the deeper harder things and feel comforted in the knowing that you don't. Music. Hello welcome back to belonging the podcast it's Becca piastrelli here coming to you.

In an early October Vibe it's the best month isn't it in so many ways, really feeling the crispness and the mornings and the crunch of the leaves and it's definitely not sweater weather where I live but I put one on for like, thirty minutes in the morning before the sun peeks through the trees and I live for it, I live for a seasonal transition I live for the sap going to the roots, I live for the slow down even though it can feels so difficult

I actually had a friend texts me this weekend I was really honored actually we knew each other a long time ago and we still sort of keep in touch and she said hey I think what I'm experiencing right now, is because of the seasonal transition and I just thought of you like I'm having a really hard time slowing down I'm really weepy I think I might be getting sick and I was like yeah what you're feeling is from a seasonal transition it is asking us to slow down.

Does impact our nervous system it's okay to feel grief as the sap literally descends. Down down down like this is all normal this is all an eight.

So she gave herself a day a rainy day inside at which was a big deal for her and I was just yessing that in a big way and I'm guessing that to myself and to all of you if you're struggling to slow down but also really craving it look to the ways of the trees outside your window no matter where you live, you may it may be spring time the sap is rising in the Southern Hemisphere or whenever you're listening to this but it's okay it's okay to want to slow down and it's okay if it's hard,

nature can show us how to do it. I wanted to let you know about a little event an online Workshop I'm hosting with the wonderful sea grape apothecary if you have never heard of sea grape Apothecary get on the internet look them up are based in Portland Oregon run by a fabulous group of babes and their Instagram is really fabulous and they have an incredible I'm like virtual event program and

I am telling you about an event that's on December 11th and I'm telling you now because you know what happens in December to our calendars so I'm doing an event called basking in your glow rituals from The ancestral Hearthfire. And we're going to talk about easing into.

The end of the calendar year while also on the other side of the witches New Year and really bringing a different way of reviewing the last year and preparing for the Dreamtime and preparing for the year to come from like anise ancestral agrarian perspective looking at the way our lives and our Creations go from dream to seed to sprout to flower to fruit to seed again. So you can look them up they'll be a link in my bio on Instagram but if you go to Sea grape.

One word sea grape Apothecary and click on their events mine is called basking in your glow rituals from The ancestral Hearthfire and then I have a coupon code. The coupon code is belonging I think you get 10 or 15 percent off tickets and tickets are really affordable so come join me for that wanted to let you know.

Okay today's episode I've been really looking forward to this one is with Erin Claire Jones The One and Only the human design I'm not saying Guru because I don't believe in gura culture but she's a badass when it comes to human design and I have a really fun story about how we came into each other's lives that I share in the episode but if you don't follow Aaron clear Jones on Instagram she's got the pink background and she shares just such

good information and affirmations based on your human design type if you don't know what human design is you'll find out on this episode I've had guests in the past talk about human design I I really like it and you know there are people who are really into Enneagram their people are really into astrology people who are really into the gene keys and I understand when you're passionate about something it's like your thing, and my thing is human design,

and I just find it to be so helpful so I asked Aaron on to talk about human design as it relates to parents and partners so, feels like a little different from maybe what you've heard about human design and trying to make it work for your work life I know for me it's been really, important for me to understand like how to best work with my energy and my multi passionate nature and.

And how to divest from capitalism in a way that feeds my energy and also serves my purpose in the world and my creations.

And it can be helpful in relationships to and when you have kids so that's really what we focus on so let me give you the Bayou air and clear Jones uses human design to help thousands of individuals and companies step into their work and their lives as their truest selves and to their Highest Potential, her work as a guide coach and speaker has attracted a growing community of 190,000 people who turned her teachings for practical tools digestible tips,

and deeper self knowledge they can access to live with greater ease and authenticity every day she's got some really awesome things to share with us including the blueprint book which I'm excited to get mine and there's a coupon code for that too, it's belonging that's the coupon code,

that's just always going to be the coupon code when we have things to offer you and yeah why don't you settle in and listen in whether you have a partner not or are apparent or not if you're curious or you're like super in with me and want to learn more and want to go deeper I think this episode will be really helpful okay let's Dive In. Well Aaron clear Jones welcome to belonging so good to be with you so happy to be here thank you for having me.

So we have a connection that I just think is a beautiful way to begin this conversation which is we knew about each other on the internet, because of mutual friends and you're just like this incredible human design voice particularly on Instagram and then I somehow knew that you.

Moved to Upstate New York I somehow know I don't know how because you're not like you know loud and proud about that, and then we had connected about doing human design I think my friend Nisha was like you got interview her and then I was like hey. Where do you live before we ever talked right before that we see me like before recorded yeah you like oh I know about your book and I was like oh where do you live.

And you're like this town in Hudson Valley Upstate New York and I was like okay well that is the literal exact town I am looking to move to, from California and thus began this like beautiful. Friendship that we've had where you've really supported me in this big.

Huge migration decision that Tim and I are undertaking and you even gave me the name of your realtor which is how we found the farm, which is a very magical story so I'm very looking forward to being in community with you and I just publicly say to the world thank you for all your generosity and welcoming me in a big momentous transition I'm.

Trusting oh my God I it's been my pleasure I think that I am so excited for more people to come up here and I think it's such a special place, and I also am so excited for like more mothers and parents and families and so I think I was like had an agenda I was like I wish I could move here this would be amazing so I'm just I'm so amazed and like in true manifesting generator fashion, I'm so amazed by like you just feeling like I'm going to do it and then like just doing.

You know I feel like people Express interests often and then it's like okay like you know who knows but you really just like, you made it happen so it was so funny so Becca and that for the first time in person a couple weeks ago but it felt like we're already so connected because we're like oh we've been texting for a long time so I'm so excited to have you up here and have more time together.

Yeah on our girls night must have girls very excited to be in Mama Community with you yeah okay so I asked you on because human design is hot hot hot yeah. And I literally can't stop myself from bringing up Hoon design in almost every conversation I have like.

With my head trainer like with my mama friends like I'm constantly pulling up Jovian archive and like looking up people's charts and texting I'm a screenshot like and and then people like oh you do human design reading some like actually all I know are the types and the authorities and it's enough for me to have like very important and deep and fun on the way,

conversations and so I am just like biased and a fan I'm not this isn't going to be like the Enneagram episode and the Myers-Briggs episode this is like human design underline highlight Becca laughs so. I find that some people get very overwhelmed particularly with the visual when you get in your human design it's like a body and there's like lines and things and people feel like okay what's going on so I brought you on to just give us a primer like what is human design.

How do you feel like I mean it's what your work is about like how do you feel can benefit us I will probably try Min and then we wanted to talk as, as Mama's about incorporating him a design into the parenting and maybe partnering, side of life because it's just endlessly helpful so maybe yeah you just probably have a Spiel I think a great entry point is the types yeah which is what you share on your grandma lat. We can go from there okay perfect so.

Human design for those new is a system based on your time date and place of birth that reveals your energetic blueprint and how your unique be wired to thrive, whether it's in your work in your family and your relationships and it basically gives us each our own kind of unique roadmap to finding more flow in our lives.

And I think what drew me to human design is that it's very actionable, like not only gives us all this like juicy self-knowledge about how we operate best but it gives us all these tools to actually step into it and my experience with human design is that it's often not about telling people anything new.

It's just giving them a language for things they have always felt and known to be true about themselves and having like a stranger mirror back or like oh my God yes, like I feel such permission to be me so it's been pretty tremendous that I think when I first discovered human design, it was not hit it was not a cool thing and like no one knew what it was and so I was like this is amazing like what are people going to care and so

it's really just been so inspiring to watch it grow in popularity and watch people just start to integrate human design into their language and how they do business and how they pair it and all the things so it's an amazing system and it's one of many tools but it's one that I have fallen very deeply in love with. Did you want to share anything about your love for human design before I talk about types. Yeah so I sort of found like a I mean I'm very into astrology.

I could kind of get into any G but I often get my numbers confused because numbers are hard for me and there is something about human design which I know has its origins in like all these different sort of mystical ancient like but the daodejing and astrology and all these ways in which. Those all contribute to like a body of knowledge that really was channeled which when I first heard about that was like what but then just having, it like the blueprint I love that term.

Reflect back to me literally everything I knew to be true I find sometimes that people like oh that's so Virgo of you and I'm like. I don't know about that or like I find myself questioning it there's something about human design that just feels. Affirming yeah. And I find I never feel you know how sometimes with a I don't I'm trying not to shit talk astrology because I very much like it but you know what people like oh that's like so scorpy on it and you're like.

Is that a dick, I don't know if that's big where is there such a human design where it just all feels uplifting and useful and I now just want to know everyone who comes into my life I am really want to know what their design is so that I can how I can best be a friend to them.

How I can invest in Courage them and how I can take like cues or ways of being and just like not make it means some story and actually understand how they operate so it's just, great and it's really great for my marriage for me to remember I'm married to a pure generator and it's just like. I'm constantly reading about it too like okay that's what's going on that's what's going on got it what is his authority.

Sacral like mine okay cool I am we can talk about what that is for those who are new but, I love hearing that you know and I think that it is it is meant to be such an empowering and uplifting uplifting systems I'm just so glad that that's been your experience you know I think it's easy to go like I can't do this because then this type and it's like no. Thank you design or like any system like doesn't tell us what we cannot do it just lets us know how we can do it best at our own unique way,

and so it's really meant to be a thing that empowers and uplifts us and doesn't limit us so. Let's start with the tights yeah so in human design there are like Becca said you look up the chart and you'll be this is crazy there's so much information but there's a lot of very like at the surface information that's incredibly useful and it's a beautiful place to start with.

And so one of those pieces is your tight and there are five different types manifesting generators generators manifestos projectors and reflectors. You can look at my Jovi and you can look it up a human design blueprint.com all you need is your time date and place of birth and again don't try to make sense of the chart immediately it's super not intuitive just look at your time.

And so you have a family full of generators and manifesting generators, lots of powerful energy in your household so we'll start with generators and manifesting generators and I'll talk about them together and then separately and then the three other types so.

Generators and manifesting generators are really here to be the doers, the ones that have such tremendous energy to build create and make things happen when they are so genuinely lit up and excited by what they're doing and so I would say one of their biggest lessons is really prioritizing their excitement. And knowing the more lit-up they are the more energy they have the more magnetic they become the more they kind of uplift everyone around them.

Another big lesson for both of these types is boundaries. Because they have such tremendous vitality and energy available to them people can really want to just like get in and take advantage and like you saw that precious energy and so really having strong boundaries and trusting your gut to know what you're available for and what you're not. I think when we talk about the distinctions you know manifesting generator so like you and your daughter are both quite multi passionate.

You know you're not really meant to like lock yourself into one career or one way of doing things like you might find yourself weaving in between different passions and excitement You Are multi-hyphenate by Nature your career likely will not look super linear you're not really meant to stick with the same thing forever,

you're quite quick in your ability to make things happen so I would say your gift is probably not handling every single step along the way so it's really nice to have people around you that can support you and that in a way that kind of allows you to move fast and be in your flow.

Whereas your husband and generators really carry this kind of very steadfast like committed energy so again if they love to do lots of things I'll never tell them not to do it but it might be more like I'm gonna die really deeply into this one thing you know and then like when it's time like really deeply into this other thing you know and so really it's just trusting that and I would say do notice that difference in your partnership

in terms of kind of your multi passionate versus kind of his more I'm going to dive deeply into this one thing yeah it makes him really nervous when I your energy in that way energy yeah probably when I project it right I'm like but let's do this in this and this and this and this and this and so now we sort of have, archetypal we've named it in an archetypal way like I'm the dreamer and he's the logistical doer and I do but like.

I think that's maybe the manifesting side which we can talk about in a moment I'm sure but. Yeah he can work for so long on one thing and it can go so in depth. And that's really I mean we also kind of live in a generator. Capitalism feels like a generator world and so he's been able to do well for himself but also he burns out. He doesn't always know when to stop.

And I think I have a bit more of like okay it's time to move on or hope it's not feeling well oh this feels good or you know where I think that can. That's nice for him to see in me and remind him of.

Yeah and I think it's you know I've seen so many generators who can be so competent at so many things you know they carry such powerful energy but like, then actually being excited and lit up and satisfied by it is the most important thing you know and so it is just like really that I'm learning how to prioritize that in the smallest of ways and learning how to support each other in that in Partnership.

And the last piece that I would share about generators and manifesting generators is that you're really not meant to chase after anything. Your strategy is all about responding or I just think of it as magnetism like you basically are meant to like let the things show up, wait for them to spark you and then like if your gut lights up and you're like yes I feel drawn to an expanded by this thing then go make that thing happen.

You know but you're basically waiting to be led by your God and not by your mind or what you think you should do so just kind of noticing any places you've been pushing or Forces versus the ones you kind of allowed yourself to wait for that natural response to guide you. Yeah that's the biggest challenge for me yeah well I think also the go ahead. What do you think also oh I was just thinking of like the your move to the Hudson Valley feels like very much in response.

Deuteronomy and like it feels like but it was a wait to respond it was a wait wait wait wait like you even want to do for a while. Yeah oh well we've known for years we wanted to move. Cease well first it was somewhere else and then it was East and then we went to Vermont last October thinking for sure it was Vermont and we just. Couldn't get to a yes A got yes, but we are brains like we got close like we went and toured properties and fully were like we could make this happen right now but.

I guess we're wise enough and I've had enough wrong like wrong turns and life to be like no, no so that when we saw this place that our realtor showed us it was just like. Yes like big guess even we were trying to convince ourselves it was a no but it was such a gut yes but we waited and I think we had a therapist. Like five or six years ago we were in some sort of like question about life I think it was actually about moving.

And he said to us the decisions not ready to be made yet and that has been my mantra for us. Is like the decisions not ready to be made yet because we don't have enough information in our bodies our guts are not saying yes because our brains could literally. Do anything but it's just like the decisions already been made yet and and then yes always comes and it always requires. Quieting which is also a challenge.

Yeah and it's like and especially for you and Tim and this is the authority piece that I referenced earlier it speaks to how we best make decisions that are human design. Like you and Tim are both I got full body like it's full body towards a no. Or it's a not now you know and it can be really annoying when it's like I want a yes before I'm getting it but it's almost always worth it to wait for it.

You know and so waiting for that moment we're just like every part of my body says yes even though like my mind might be trying to tell me a very different story whether it's convincing me into her out of this thing. Mmm-hmm so the other types we've got projectors manifestos and reflectors so projectors are really here to be leaders guides teachers advisors not here to do all the doing.

So so much of being a projector is knowing that your gift is not and how hard you work or how much you do but really kind of in your perspective and how you see. These people are often very innately wise to and kind of wise about insensitive to people. And they're often people they love human decide they love often any system that kind of helps them better understand people and how they work.

Their energy will likely Evan flow so really building space Andres and he's into their days is so beneficial to them and everyone around them and their strategy is waiting to be recognized and invited in so. Again no chasing no initiating, waiting for people to be like I see you I value you I want your perspective like I want you and the invitation is our most powerful tool as projectors to just like know who's ready for our energy and when.

And I think one thing I've discovered is that projectors like they see a lot and it's very time they don't want to share all the things that they see, but if they share them and people are not open and often won't land and it can just like cultivate a lot of bitterness and so that invitation is like that energetic opening of like are they ready and do they actually value it so it's like not a waste of my energy or theirs.

Yeah every human design person I've ever known it's a projector I know it's and there are non projector human design people who are amazing, but they do it is a very natural place for us just because like we love mastering systems we love guiding people like we love asking the right questions like it's a really nice fit for those things. So is the not-self theme bitterness.

And and The Bitter End so we all have kind of signals that reveal Winter Walk Off Track and so for a generators and manifesting generators frustration is that indicator kind of a resentment dissatisfaction sense whereas, to be on track is to feel deeply satisfied and fulfilled for projectors to be off track is bitterness and that's really rooted in a sense of like,

I've got so much to share no one's asking me you know or I don't really feel recognized or appreciated for who I am and to be on track is Success which like. Of course could manifest is material success but more important than that it's really around like I just feel so recognized and appreciated for like who I am and what I do. Yeah so many projectors I know.

Feel a real challenge in like our culture especially like our work culture, around living their design particularly around rest in the invitation. And then I've had some friends like be like I'm a projector but like I think I'm fully in a trauma response working as a, generator yeah and like you say to that when people are like I don't think I'm actually being the projector I am.

Why I think most of us are you know I think that when I first discovered human design I was like I was trying so hard to be a generator, I was like I don't and I still do you know some days and like it's been so useful to have a partner know my human design and just beg Aaron like you could rest right now I'm like oh that's an option cool you know so I think that like. I think what I remind those people of is like one that's so normal.

You know like we live like you said and like a very generator and manifesting Generator world so it's really easy to kind of get our worth tied up in that I think often as projectors we can get away with it until we're like around 30 and then kind of it starts to become clear that were like this is not sustainable anymore and I would just say is projectors like start small.

You know like start building and rest in the smallest of ways and just see the difference I think what I've noticed is the more I allow an arrest and support and he's like, the more successful in the better I am you know like I'm way more effective at my work and I think what I used to feel as a projectors that I felt like even rest had to be productive I was like okay what course we'll listen do what podcast will I like to listen to and it was just like,

I never give myself time to be like unproductive and so that was a big kind of initial learning of like what if I give myself time to do nothing. You know and like there's no achievement or productivity associated with this moment, and that's been really powerful and then you know to the invitation Point as well one piece I didn't mention is that like.

As a projector it's hard to rule the invite you and if they don't know you exist and so one of our biggest jobs as projectors is to let people know that we exist, you know and not Pitch people but just like share you know share what you're inspired by and what you're thinking about like, not because your Desiring to be seen by certain people but you're just making yourself available to be seen you're making yourself available for the right people to kind of resonate with and come to you.

And you're in partnership with a generator right. Right so you're the Barack Obama and he's the Michelle Obama and Michelle I'll take it but but yes and and we also work together, so it's been a really, is the projector generator Duo can actually so wonderful in business and life but it worked gosh why are your is that you realize how different you are. Yeah I I do enjoy collaborations with. Projectors actually okay I've gone through a few reminder I'm a manifesting generator.

I've gone through a few iterations of like recruiting like people for my team and I get a lot of projectors. I mean like it's amazing because I asked I asked for people to share their human design yeah and I'm wondering what you have to say about that as like a manifesting generator, type like running the business like being the Visionary and then and then having projectors apply to like.

Do the stuff it feels counterintuitive to me but I also don't want to like put that on these people you know.

Yeah and I also know that you power them you know what I mean like and not in a way hopefully that's is empowering for projectors but like when you're lit up like it will give them energy, and so like I think that if they feel really recognized and appreciated and valued for the gift that they're like going to be offering and like the area they're gonna be focusing on it can be amazing you know and projectors can be so good at asking the right questions giving you things to respond to

we definitely have attracted almost purely projectors that are business, really enter partner really fuels at all thank God for him so but I think that it's a really nice balance but I would say that it's probably a good balance for you to like have, I don't know how big your team is or what the support is like but I think having a balance of different types specifically having like more generators and projectors can be really nice.

But there is a me right now but it's so not sustainable and so I'm excited too. Bring on more people okay so let's go to the next manifest stirs our. Really here to be the disruptors the innovators the ones that are really good at getting things started and initiating not always going to do all the doing but often hater like get the ball rolling they are often people that thrive when they feel a sense of freedom and autonomy and control.

They are not here to be told what to do or manage are guided in any way here to do things on their own terms and in their own way, and their energy can often operate in Creative bursts where they can make a lot happen very quickly over the course of a couple hours couple days couple weeks and then it is going to pull back on a rest and wait for the next inspiration it kind of arise within them

and their strategy is about initiating their here to make the first move wait for thing to arise and follow it and also about informing and what I mean by that is just.

If they're going to make a big decision or take action on something it's really healthy to keep the people around them in the loop and just give them a heads-up before they fly and it makes me feel kind of feel like they're on their team and they can really kind of support that vision, so then do I have a manifest stir in my generator like how does that manifesting generator is that is that a combination of both so you know it's,

it's a little bit confusing so I would say that like it's most important reader like remember that you're a generator but I think the idea only because like if you start initiating things in chasing after things you're probably going to burn out, would be my guess whereas like when you let things come to you it's your greatest tool to actually know if you have the energy for it. Once you have that clear gut response is something as come you can make things happen like a Manifesto very easily.

That's kind of where it comes out it's like once the response is there like let's go you know let's like make it happen and manifesting generators and all types are so nuanced and the actual individual design but. It's more around like wait for the regenerative response and then you can kind of Be That Power House making it happen. Yeah oh yeah I am just thinking of my two friends who are manifest errs and. Man how jazzed I get.

I like their ideas in the projects they bring to me and like our friend dates are so epic like it's just so full of life and newness and energy. It's just feels so good to be around them yeah and they're so inspiring. You know and they also can be like a little bit provocative like they're just like you know I do their own things that's like really nice for them to be around people that really like like you were like oh this is like such an inspiring energy to be around it's so impactful.

But sometimes people can like want to control them or feel like a little bit threatened that they're not fitting in or like into a box that they're familiar with and so I think it's really important as a Manifesto to be surrounded by people that really emboldened you, and like remind you how powerful you are and like really want to give you all the space to be free and all the ways you want so so now let's talk about,

isn't it like 2% of what profession one percent okay are reflectors reflectors are, really our Collective mirrors there are people that are deeply sensitive to their physical space and always kind of taking in and magnifying the energy that they're around, and so you really get a good sense of how a team or company is doing based on how that reflector is showing up and so it's important for them to just be really ruthless about where they spend time,

but spaces with offices would homes but City's what coffee shops and who they spend time with because they will magnify that. The magic of reflectors and there so many magical things but one piece is that they're very fluid.

They might have days where they feel like a generator like a manifesting generator like a projector like a Manifesto or so, third job is not to be just one thing our shop and just one way but honor whatever feels like them that day knowing that is all them and, we call them evaluators in the context of business just because they have such a gift for like seeing and sensing things that most people miss and so they have such an invaluable and such a powerful perspective so,

really important for them to be in spaces where that perspective feels really recognized and invited in so what's there not self theme there not cell theme has disappointment. And that's often when they're kind of in the wrong spaces with wrong people know the signature that an alignment so that sign is around being surprised.

They're kind of just like surrender to whatever wants to come through and not trying to control it and manifest sirs to be in alignment is piece kind of able to do what they want when they want and off-track not self is anger, which often is rootedness answer feeling disempowered or a lack of control cool so that's a great starting point everyone so you can go to human design blueprint, dot-com right and put in all your information and it'll pop out.

A lot of information but if you just look at the type talking like scroll back and or like you know go rewind whatever you do in a podcast and listen to what we just said. And think about how that shows up for you and then like you can go down the rabbit hole of human design drive it home yeah. Yeah so okay anything else you want to share about it or should be what do you want me to share about it around parenting.

With the tight I do I guess I just wanted to talk about Authority really query of course. Because I have a daughter with emotional Authority this is a perfect segue actually independent great okay. So yeah what is the authority types like what is what is that about. So there are seven different authorities and they are I would say the next piece that I would recommend diving into and it reveals how we best make decisions.

And so it's obviously so important because we're making decisions all the time and it really helps us know how to make decisions in the most aligned way and none of us are meant to make decisions for our minds like none of us are meant to create these like procon lists and rationalizing our way in our out it's more just like really tapping into a deeper knowing and human design reveals but that is for us so,

we talked about mine and Tim's yeah it is sacral so from the gut and the as well waiting for the all the information and waiting for the gut yes, uh-huh are the uh uh yes and then Atlas my child we found out. Okay so I was telling okay slight Side Story but worth it Aaron and I were like having.

Coffee and pastries in our in our new town and I was telling her about how when she gives birth which will be soon, how she needs to have a cosmic cheerleader text thread which is like all the most beloved's like. Tuning into the birth enough to be like what's happening but to be like sending love sending energy and then to celebrate when the baby comes and so I'd this Cosmic cheerleaders text thread.