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My goodness, Being Frank, where the only way to be is Frank. Hello everyone, and welcome to Being Frank, where the only way to be is Frank. I'm your host, Frank Lebuono, and I'd like to thank you for joining us on what we like to call the Intelligent Conversation podcast, where no conversations out of bounds and all points of view are welcome. We go live to tape recording. That is why I give you the date so you have some context and relevance to our conversation. It is the
twenty first of November. In my standard weekly opening, I describe Being Frank as the Intelligent Conversation Podcast for a reason. It is my effort to describe a forum where people can find an alternative to the plethora of other podcasts that will say virtually anything simply to gain ratings that often includes deliberate miss and disinformation. Well, that's not what we're about. It's not that we dalt difficult or controversial subjects. As I also say in my intro, no conversations out
of bounds and all points of view are welcome. We are willing to discuss virtually anything with anyone, as long as it takes place in an environment that encourages discourse, not dissonance, and we have often bringing leaders from industry, academia, the media, and community groups to have our discussions. But being Frank's goal is also to reach out to our neighbors, the people from our communities who, by how they live their very lives, serve as an example to all of us. Recently,
through sheer happenstance, I met just such a person. We had both attended a lecture at our local library and we're leaving at the same time. I noticed that she had a bit of trouble negotiating the library steps, so I offered my assistance. She accepted that and my offer to walk her the remaining block or two to her apartment. It took just that brief walk to know that I had met an exceptional individual that I needed to know more about, and when I did, I was not disappointed.
And neither will you be born and bred in the Bronx. She later moved to Chelsea, where she lived for thirty years. After college graduation, she went to Los Angeles and acted in Shakespeare rep in children's theater. She eventually moved back to New York and did Dinner theater in the Southwest US. She had mirrored jobs while looking for acting gigs, and later learned the computer, where she spent many years as a database researcher. About eight years ago, she moved from Washington,
d C. To her latest place in Niak. She is currently working on an illustrated children's book with local artist Bobby Belfry. Please welcome my guest and friend, new friend, Maxine Burstein. Maxine, thank you so much for taking the time to join us here today.
Well, thank you so much for having me.
Well, you know, let's start early on. And I know it's kind of rude to ask a woman her age, but you know, we have to have some context to what we're talking about here in terms of the history that you've experienced. So when were you born?
I was born in nineteen thirty eight, which makes me an eighty six year old young senior.
Okay, I was going to say thirty nine, just you know, but okay, as I found you to be very truthful from the beginning. So you mentioned growing up in the Bronx. What was it like at that time? You mentioned you were born in the thirties, so obviously the early part of your life spent in the Bronx. What was it like at that time, Oh, it was wonderful.
I lived in a small side street of two family houses right next to each other. It was a lively community. I had a lot of friends, and I had a wonderful little dog named Topsi, who I loved and was probably my best friend. And I at a very early age, was taken to the movies, which I completely fell in love with. So I spent a lot of my time when I wasn't in school going to the movies, going to one of the two local theaters and watching all my famous movie stars see these drap books, and dreaming
of being a movie star myself. I think at that point I loved it so much. I wanted to be an actress. I wanted to be in the movie. This was way before I got into the theater.
Yeah, but that was kind of your epiphany, Maxine, If you will, you knew even at that moment that at least a good part of your life would be in the theater, and you did me.
I was a very very imaginative child. I spent a lot of time playing with my cutout dolls and I would act out all the parts, so I really knew I had something going on there.
Wow. Now you mentioned your neighborhood. What was it like. Was it a very mixed neighborhood? Was it more a group of one grouping of one people?
It was really a Jewish neighborhood.
Mostly Jewish people lived in the and that area of the I think, I don't know. I think it was right off the concourse, right off the Grand Concurse.
Okay, interesting, And we only.
Knew each other and had parties on special occasions. I had a lot of friends to play with, and when I got a little bit older and I had a friend, we would play make the League games because the make the League games. And who do you think wrote the script for most of the things going on to faries visiting the team. It was me and I think one or two of the people who lost contact with went into the entertainment industry as directors and producers.
Let's talk a little bit about some of your role models. Now you mentioned movie stars being some who were your favorites? And who else might you have considered an influence.
I really didn't have a mentor unless you considered the movie stars because I was so attached to the movies that I.
Loved the stories about the women who were brave and strong and face all obstacles and then came through as heroine. And my very favorite actress is Betty Grable, and she taught me that no matter what problem you had in life, when you went out and did your job and sang and did your dance, when you got back off stage, all your problems were solved.
Wow.
I loved her.
Wow Wow.
No.
Have you lived in many various places. We talked a little bit about it, from the Bronx to Chelsea, DC, Los Angeles. Was that by circumstance or choice?
Well, it was by choice. Once I got old enough to leave my home. After I graduated college, I went out to Los Angeles to live with a cousin of mine because I still had dreams of being in the movies or on television. My favorite show is maver I love James Garner, and my dream was to be on the show. But unfortunately, it was very difficult to find an agent to represent me. Every time I would bring my picture in or have an interview or something, they take.
Oh, well, look at this isn't this interesting? Well, that was the Tis Death. I never heard from him after they did it.
Wow, it was very incredibly interesting that Wow.
So I never got on the show, but I did get to do that Shakespeare and rep and Children's Theater and I was there for two years and then came back to New York and did another Shakespeare production and a lot of showcases in sho Goo in art galleries doing I had a friend who.
Was a playwright. I did all of his plays.
And then I got into Dinners Theater and traveled down to North Carolina and Oklahoma and Mississippi and it was all a.
Wonderful You talk about that experience, Maxine, it was positive. You went to again. I said, it's so fascinating that this girl from the Bronx is experiencing all Like you said, North Carolina, Mississippi helped. It couldn't get more different. What was that experience like for you?
Oh, Dinner Theater is wonderful.
It's absolutely wonderful because you experience with an audience and getting their reactions. And I did a lot of Neil Simon at the North Carolina Theater and I.
We were very.
Successful that the audience as loved us, and we had some free time during the day, so there was a company card that we could use and we could go to the malls and go shopping. And since I'm the big animal person, the word got out that I was down there at the theater, so all the animals would come to the door, and of course I would adopt them, bring them into the theater, and then find homes for them.
Mississippi, word got out you were a softy MAXIEK. God, I'm guilty of that. All the stray and injured animals went up on our door steps, so I can.
Relate, right, Mississippi was a little different. Pots tell us about it, so friendly, and I felt I didn't feel comfortable there, although the audience blowed those And in Oklahoma we did very well and it's a big, sprawling place and we just drove.
Around and.
Which Denis, it was wonderful and wonderful learning experience.
So overall the experience for you was positive. And you you know, you mentioned some of the down stuff and it's it's part of the overall experience, but you always seem to try to make it into something positive. I think that's an important element of your your thought process. Talk a little bit about that.
Well, there was a long time in my life where I was depressed about not getting parts and having to do jobs that I didn't like, and it was hard to get out of it, and I would come home and drink a bottle of wine and then feel terrible the next day. And after going into therapy, the doctors helped me a lot. And also some of the pills, the antidepression pills they gave me help me a lot.
And I had a very very very wonderful close friend who would talk me out of my depression and would be very supportive to me and taught me to face all my problems and start looking at the positive side.
It was.
It was a very hard thing to learn and I'm still learning it. But these past few years in Nyak have been so wonderful that I feel like a new person, especially being here with you.
I want to talk a little bit about your community involvement in a few moments too, and because I know that that's an important part of your life very much. So that's that's how we met. And you belong to writers' circles and you keep busy and I know that's important. We're going to talk about it in a minute, but I also want to talk about your sense of history. You've seen so much, You've traveled, your work has allowed you that through your dinner, theater, experience, your personal experiences
of living at different parts of the country. So you've seen change obviously in your eighty plus years, hopefully for the better. But I'm not going to put words in your mouth. Having a witnessed so much history. What are some of the things that stick out in your mind that has shaped you as a person and also as an American.
Well, I think one of the biggest things I remember was my first time voting. I was living in Los Angeles and I had ants and d dollar and I voted to Kennedy. When he got elected and served as president, I loved him, and of course the assassination was something horrible to experience. And then when Obama got elected, it was a joy for me. And what I have seen that has been so different. See, the fifties were a
time of safety. I could go on the subway late at night and come home late at night and never be afraid of being hosted or rape or anything. There was nobody out on the streets late at night. I lived near the subway, and I could come home.
There were no.
Guns, there were no stories of schools being hurt.
It was safe to go to school.
You had a lot of friends, you did a lot of activities after school, and it was a safe time. It might have been a little bit of a room rest time, but it was safe. And I felt good growing up. And then the sixties came along, and that was wonderful. That was wonderful. I loved I was doing acting, I was doing my dinner theater, I was doing some shows. I was in California for two years doing the Shakespeare,
as I said, in the children theater. And then I came back doing some more shows and working a lot of tech jobs. And I learned how to use the computer from a friend.
Of mine early on in the sixties. That was really cutting edge.
Yeah, And it was like, you know, when there was just one server.
And you didn't have pcvs, and so you had to learn the system. And it was called a modem system.
I don't think modem. I forgot the name of it anyway. One of the jobs that I got, one.
Of the the tempo that I got with with a public relations agency where I had to use and do email and mailings on the computer, and then I got hired by them. I was with them for quite a while before they offered me a job, and so I took the job because I would get health.
Insurance and all sorts and then be employee.
And at some point later on I gave up acting because I got really sick and tired of sitting in all the audition rooms and seeing the same faces and saying to myself, what am I going to do this when I'm fifteen years old sitting in this room seeing the same face, So don't you just not do it anymore? So I took the job, and a good things happened out of the job because they decided they wanted to have some research done and they hook up with a database.
I forgot the name of it. It's a very popular database where you can get all sorts of media to get information.
So I learned that.
And I was doing research for all the people in the agency. I set up a library for the agency. I was doing like the work of a librarian without a degree, and it turned out to be a very interesting experience to me.
Another thing that was really interesting was.
In the evenings of there was this newspaper in New York where you could take courses in the evenings a very little bit money, and there were all different things. The only thing that stayed interesting to me was a horseback ridding. Being an animal lover, I wanted to be near a horse, so I signed up. I did four
weeks to that. I was absolutely terrible, but I stayed on and I signed up for lessons and I stayed at that for years and years and years, and I learned how to ride a horse, interplications in it in Ireland.
Riding and the band for Girl from the Bronx.
Huh yeah, so they took the place in theater for me.
Oh interesting. Now, One thing I want to and you mentioned the feeling of safety in the fifties and the challenges of the sixties and then through the seventies as well, with the Vietnam War creating discord in this country. Certainly like I've never seen until now in your mind, what's happened? How did we go from the ability and you mentioned things not perfect, but certainly I don't know if accessibility
is the right word. Civility is put in there. We seem to have lost so much of that what's you're thinking? What happened?
I knew what happened.
I mean that that Trump becoming popular and becoming president the first time and spouting his eight two people.
I don't know what happened.
I think what happened was that the rich cut richard and the middle class started to lose their comfort and their future and things.
Started to change for the worst.
And people's people were not really paying attention to what was going on, and most of them just would listen to to short, short speeches. They wouldn't they wouldn't go on TV and listen to the people who were telling us what was going on, and so they were taking shortcuts. And then when Trump came in, they believed.
Him and they listened to him.
And I always felt as though he had a group of people that were supporters, but I didn't know that there would be so many has happened during the election with a public vote.
I still don't know what happened.
I'm absolutely sick and frightened to death because he's already shown and he's taking over everything. He's putting all these idiots in dot can listen to him and follow what he wants to do.
You know, don't don't hold back, Maxine. I'm sorry, you know, I'm not at all. I'm I'm encouraging you. This is, you know, open honest conversation. It's being frank, and I appreciate your frankness, I really do. That's why I asked you to come on. I knew you would be forthcoming and honest talk a little bit too. You know, as a woman and as an independent woman, you've obviously always been your whole life. And yet many women seem to have some Trump for president. He wouldn't have We won
the popular vote, he won the electoral vote. Your thoughts on that As a woman, I've tried to.
Figure out how that can be. I mean, the women who are married to the Trump men, well, you know, they probably even have the same feelings or listen to their husbands.
Although I've seen some.
Of these women for Trump and they're like they're as bad as the men when I've seen them on TV. I think the Latin women supported Trump. It was the men who will have this motto feeling and loved that Marconis of Trump voted for him. But I think they the Latin women voted for Trump. I'm really not sure about why a lot of white women, working women.
Voted room. I can to drive off. I just can't to grove off.
Well, you know, America has changed. It's obviously, I mean it's it's it's a it's a living thing. Democracy, the Constitution is supposed to be a living thing as we hopefully progress. So you've you've seen so many changes over the course of your lifetime. How has America changed for the better or for the worse or both? What have you seen that really strike you?
What strikes me is that there is a big divide between people, and there's a big feeling that we're not doing.
As well as we really are.
For some reason, people bought the fact that they wanted the better economy will our economy is doing so well. They don't understand why they think that, And people want more. I think Americans are very singular. Me me, my mine, I want, I want, I want. A lot of Americans.
I'm not going to.
Say every American, but most Americans are give me I want, I want to and so they want America to be great again. So I think there's a great divide between the people who feel as though they should have more, and they're very upset with the government that doesn't give them more, even though Biden did.
And it's a great country. It's a wonderful country.
I'm absolutely thrilled to be an American and not than anywhere else in this world.
And well, I'm not rich, you know.
I can take care of myself and I and it's enough for me.
But I think society makes.
You want to have more and more and more, and that's why people have developed their love for Trump.
It's a perfect segue into my next couple of questions. And then we'll take a quick break, Maxine, I'll let you get some water. I'm making you talk to the point of jump. Okay, you will take a break in just a couple of minutes. Two more quick questions. You you live alone, but you don't. You don't seem lonely. Is that an accurate statement? Talk a little to that.
It's a very accurate statement. Because I'm very busy. I keep myself very busy with volunteer work and joining groups. My library is an absolutely wonderful treasure and it has wonderful things to join. I'm part of a Shakespeare reading group. On Mondays.
We read the.
Play, we watch tapes of the plays, we talk about the planes. I also belong to a wonderful group of senior actors called Maturely Motivated Players, and we perform at public libraries and senior centers and read humor through people like the Jerry Steinfeld, Demita Radner and and like that, and we.
Make people laugh.
And we did three shows about getting older and life is of stable of charities and getting rid of all your stuff, and we've been very successful so far, so I've been very lucky to be part of that. I also volunteer at the First Store where I mark the clothes they go out on the floor. I belong to an adult writing group at the library called Powels Older
Writers Lab. And there's another senior group called Creative Aging in NAT, which is an absolute marvelous group of seniors who have to live in Naya to join, and we meet every other week and have programs and teach us about getting older, teach us all about different things that can affect their life. And I did a wonderful program on humor for them where I made them laugh and forget all their cares. And they're very helpful. When I had my hip replacement, they did my shopping for me.
They came and brought me through. They helped me drive me to the market to go shopping every week. They're an absolute wonderful support group. So I'm very busy.
And also I did volunteer work at an elementary school in the first grade, helping kids read. So I'm very busy.
I can't I can't compete, I can't even keep up. What would you then say, was, is that's your Your key to living a happy, full life is experien but.
Or not with all these activities, there are still some days when I have time for myself.
So I do a lot of reading, and then I watch old movies and then I do some writing. So I'm very busy.
I keep myself active, which is very important, especially for seniors. You should go out, you should volunteer, you should meet new people. You should join the community, don't stay home yoursel.
You mentioned writing and busy, and I'm going to just tease it a little bit because we're going to take that break that I promised, and then we're talking. You're writing a children's book, and as I mentioned, it's being illustrated by a local artist who's an artist in many ways. He also has a wonderful singer Bobby Belfrey. I talk a little bit about what the book is, how you came up with the idea for the book, and where
it's going. So a lot more to come with is that. Okay, we'll take a little break at a little bit of water. Let's catch our breath, and we'll come back strong and finish this up. Okay, okay, very good. My very special guest is Maxine Burstein. You're watching Being Frank, and I'm your host, Frank Lebono. We're back with more after these brief commercial messages. Don't go anywhere yet. This is great.
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Welcome back to Being Frank, the Intelligent Conversation podcast. Thanks for sticking with us. I'm your host, Frank Lebono, and of course our followers know. Our engineer is the mailman, mister Neil Richter. Our very special guest is Maxine Bernstein, and we're talking about well life. We bring our audience a fresh topic every week and stream from Hudson River Radio, located in beautiful and historic Stony Point, New York. But remember you can catch Being Frank anywhere you get your
favorite podcasts. That includes Apple, Spotify, iHeartRadio and all the others. And because every Being Frank is archived, you can listen to any of our programs anytime you like, yes, even this one. You can find the link to Being Frank on the Hudson River Radio Facebook page or at our website Hudson Riverradio dot com. Just click on our icon and you're there. All right, back with Maxine Berthsteine, and we're talking about life and a life well lived and a lot more to go with a busy, busy lady.
She gave you just a brief list to some of our activities, and one of the more important ones is she's written a children's book. As I mentioned, it's being illustrated by local artists. Bobby Belfrey. Tell us a little bit about the book. What's it called? What's it about? How did you come up with the idea?
Well, it's a mystery, and I came up it's the idea. I just shot at the computer and the first line came up, and then I just took it from there. And it's a book about a cat or what a surprise until that catch in my life.
Who is a detective.
He is called to a farm where the hen has lost her chicks, and all the film animals were looking for the chicks and couldn't find it. So someone suggested, let's call Dexter, the wonderful detective. So Dexter comes driving on call the her horse who lives at the farm. They are the animals will have riper names, by the way, which I love giving animals human names. So he comes and he looks and he looks, and he can't find them.
But on a future tries, he hears a sound near the front of the farm under a pile of dirt, and sure enough there are the chicks and he finds them and they returned to their mother, and it ends happily with Dexter saving the day.
And what's the name of it, what's the title?
Dexter Saves the Day?
Well, there you go, Dexter saves the day. Talk a little bit about Bobby sketches and what he's creating for you.
Oh, your sketches are absolutely adorable. He hes texture in a sherlockoholme oat with a little type and hat, and all the animals are adorable, and I understand he has some more illustrations in me than he's going to bring me. But I, I obviously have never published, and I don't and they know nothing about publishing. So I've done a
lot of research online of how you get a book published. Well, I don't want to go through the extent of publishing it myself, so I looked up how you get some get a publisher without an agent, and there were about six or seven that would accept your manuscripts. And then you know what what they require you to put in a letter and what they require and how and what the format will be, and don't nail it, but send
it by email. And so I just finished writing the proposal letter and I send it to a couple of friends to look over and make some some corrections and contestant and and so the next step is sending the letter and the story out of the publishers.
And keeping my things cossed. It would be absolute.
Miracle, Maxine. If anybody can get it done, obviously it would be you.
Was wonderful.
You know. Keep in mind to put the pressure on Richard, the owner of Red Books, But we have a wonderful local bookstore resource right here in the heart of Nayak the read books. Perhaps he can help. We'll see, because it's so exciting and I think a lot of people would like to see this get done, Maxine, not only I think you have. You have a lot of fans, you really do, and I think after this podcast you're gonna have a lot more.
Oh jil that would be absolutely one.
Well, we'll see. Well's two last questions. First, if you could what advice And we've talked a little bit about it, but if you can kind of summarize, what advice would you give to people, particularly young people who want to live a good, long, successful life. Is there one key? Two key? How could you if you could? I don't know. It's a very difficult, maybe esoteric concept, but what would you tell people? What's the key to living a good, successful, happy life?
Be open? Can experiences be good, be honorable, be truth tom, do the best you can and deal with all your failures as a living experience, and.
Keep smiling and keep laughing, and keep finding things for the humorous and life rather than horrible.
It's so, what's in the future, we say the book? What else is in store for Maxine Bernstein? Going forward? And you're always moving forward.
Oh well, I'm going to continue with all my activities. And I didn't mention that I'm a member of Elmwood Playhouse and even get a show there. So I'm going back to Elmwood to help out backstage in their upcoming plays. And by the way, they played The Humans, which is on now, is absolutely wonderful.
Yes, I've seen it. We had their director on and and with a terrific show. And I saw the show Humans. It's really a great experience.
Yes, go get tickets and what is what is in store?
I hope to be in the new production when they're it is ready of the mutually motivated players, so we can go around and make people laugh and feel good. And I don't know, maybe something else t'ar up that I don't know about that I'm interested in.
That I can join.
It's the it's the open mind that you talked about, always open to new things, keeping and I.
Keep finding new authors to read by watching the zoom author talked. So I found two new authors, so I'll keep on reading.
I think you're awesome. Vaccine. I'm so glad you took the time. You know, we we we had a breakfast the other day and I said, we've got to do a podcast, and I'm so glad that we did and it worked out so well. I hope you had a good time.
I did. I did. I was very nervous before, but I'm feeling you're a wonderful man to.
Well, you know, just Maxine being Maxine, and that's good enough, good enough for me. I'm sure it's good enough for our audience. It's well too. I really appreciate you being so frank with your intelligent conversation, Maxine. It's been a real pleasure.
Thank you so much for having me, and by all my.
Neighbors and trends and great of course, we offer special thanks to our listeners who take the time to give us a voice in their lives too. Remember we offer a fresh topic every week and catch us wherever and whenever you get your favorite podcasts. Can also check us out on the Hudson River Radio Facebook page. Like us, leave us a comment, and we ask you to consider sharing being frank with others. You know, I always leave you two little things relatives kind of a sloganer saying
relative to our conversation, and some really great music. Never disappoints. Original music by many of the great local artists that live here. But first this quote from John Lennon, and I think it's simple and eloquent. Counter age by friends, not years, counter life, by smiles, not tears, simple, direct, beautiful. We've got some great closing music. As I mentioned Bobby Belfry, a multi talented artist. Not only is he doing the artwork for Maxine's new book, he's also a wonderful singer.
Here he performs with the incredible David Budway, who is also the proprietor of Maureen's Jazz, So the great Jazz Club right here at Nayak with one of these days for our engineer Neil Richter, I'm your host, Frank Lebono, and we hope to have you join us for the next being. Frank, where the only way to be is Frank, take care, everybody.
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