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app to get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes all school year long. Get a zero dollar delivery fee for your first three orders while supplies last minimum $10 per order. Additional terms apply. Hey Australia, we added show added shows down on the mic. So listen Australia, go to bad friends pod.com for those tickets. We're adding shows in almost every single city because you guys bought so many tickets. Thank you so much, man. We're not giving you
the best. So you've ever seen best shows ever down on that. So go to bad friends pod.com for those tickets. I'm coming to see you in the fall. I'm doing my tour for my new hour. It's called the freeze peach tour. Come see me. I'm going to be in Indianapolis Charlotte, Iowa, Omaha, Kansas City Cleveland, St. Louis, Grand Rapids, Detroit, Chicago, Durham, Atlanta, Charleston, Philly, New York, Phoenix, San Francisco, Boston, and Minneapolis.
I'm all over the place. Go to Andrew Santino, not come for those tickets. Andrew Santino dot com. You two are bad friends. You're these two idiots. You two are disgusting. You two are disgusting. You two are something bad friends. Well, I'm back. I'm back. How was your world tour? It goes great. Donk it. It was a great little tour in my little Asian donkey. Yeah. Had a great time in Scotland. You in Charlie Day, huh? Yeah. How would love
it? Let me tell you something. I've been hunkered down here, man. Oh, you've been hunkering. Have you been hunkering? I'm hunkering down here, making things happen. First of all, you been falling out of bedbunks and busing your lip. You have zero privileges anymore to talk about. I like that. Yeah. My head bumps. Look at your dumb lip. Show your lip to the people. It's healed now a little bit. Whoa. You know what that looks like? A nasty disease.
It was nasty, dude. It was gross. If I hit my head in a certain way, I could have died. And you smile now. Do you know this is what I don't like about this show? And this is what I don't like about all of you guys, right? Dude, you mock me. When I had the earthquake and I hit my head, you did the same thing. It was a little bump, dude. Did you get stitches, dog? What? I almost knocked out my eye. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That's it.
Yeah, you watch your tone, dude. That's insane. It's the way too much. What I'm going to say to you is this. What were you dreaming about when you fell out of the bunk? I didn't fall out of the bunk, dude. Could you listen to my story, dude? Yeah. Listen to the story, dude. All right. Follow along, my friend. Also, I have some things I want to say about certain people. You know, people won't, anyway, what I want to say is this. Okay. Yes.
I do the show. I'm in Savannah, Georgia. About the, this is fully loaded. I'm doing the fully loaded thing right in Savannah, Georgia with Bert and everybody, right? Went up. It was okay. Fun. You did great. We heard. I killed it. We heard. I killed. We heard. Great night with my friends backstage. Then there's a little pow wow. You know, you know, I love pow wow. You're a big pow wow. I'm a pow wow guy, dude. I'm from pow
way. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, so we really love it. And we go, that's what you're doing a pow wow. That is? Yeah. Yeah. We're on a campfire. There's always a campfire. And there's stories being told. Do you smoke opium? No. I'm sober now. Okay. Yeah. Back in the day, though, we used to do that. That's real pow wow. It's like dick. Oh, yeah. Opium in the dick and advice for stuff. They go hand in hand. Exactly. So then I go, all right. So what
bus am I on? And they're like the last one, which is the fourth bus with who big J and no, I don't even get that bus. Who was on your bus? I didn't know. That's how bad my bus. You were with the crew. No, it wasn't with the crew. I was with the rigors and stuff. No, that's racist. Sorry. You were with the rigors? Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. We be rigging. Yeah. We be rigging. So anyway, what happened was I, no, was a Cisco sound.
What's his name? The thong song guy. Yeah. The thong song. No, what's his name? Oh, cypher sound. Cypher sound. So he texted me. You know this, right? Right. He was like, your boy, your boy is not happy with me. And I was like, why would happen? Cause I said, you tell you, well, yeah, what have you? Yeah, what happened? All right. So it's two in the morning. And when I get on the bus, Kelsey cooks, you know, I mean, obviously bottom
bunk. She's awesome. Her boyfriend. Very funny guy. Chad Daniels. Both so funny. But they're like, we got bottom bunk. We've already established. Well, yeah, there are a couple. They get priority, but they're not in the same bunk. They're separate bunk. You can't sleep in there with another person. You barely fit in there. I know. My point is, then why do they both get bottom bunk? What does that matter? Because they want to pull the curtain
back and have a little chitchat. What up and down? That's even better. You can, you have to look down one. Oh, that's true. That's okay. Anyway. And by the way, when you're across, they can sneak scurry across and then scurry back. Disgusting. Okay. Anyway, um, so I go, what are I, where am I? They're like that top bunk. Dump bunk. So I got to take all the shit off. And then there's no mattress. Right. I go, where's the mattress? Oh, yeah,
we took it out so we can put the stuff on. So I go, where is it? I, you know, we have to put it in there. Right. And then the pillow and the sheets smell like Tony Hingecliff. Because he slept in it. It's misery. It's camping. The worst kind of camping. Once the pony's in there, right. That's my stable. So I'm sitting there and I decide I'm going to watch battle circle act that go from season one. Okay. I'm watching the night drift.
You know how I dream? You be drifting. I drift. I dream. And I fantasize revenge fantasies. All the tick talkers. I'm going to kill. You know, you know, it does. Yeah. And then, um, I don't know, two in the morning, I go, you know, how one does pee most do one does all do sometimes. That's right. All the time. So me, I'm like, should I wait? You know, you're going to sleep. You're like, you contemplate. You wake up because of the pee. And like,
can I sleep through this? Right. But then it builds like a dam. It's bubbling. You're bubbling, dude. Good to see you, man. Good to see you. And I go, I go about this. I open the curtain. It's pitch black. What's so funny? Let me guess. You forget. Don't say rig again. Once I see pitch black, and we can't say rig. Sorry. Sorry. Yeah. You forgot you were on the top bunk. I didn't forget. Okay. Yeah. I know where I'm at. I'm not
confused. Watching you swing your little legs over the top bunk and dangle them. Yeah. It's like the funniest shit I've ever seen in my life. I know. It's just your little two little legs. Exactly. I should be up there. You'd have no business. Did they get you a ladder? Should put a little ladder up there. No, no ladder. So what happened? So I scoop my little legs over pitch black. And in my mind, I'm like, how do I get down?
Right? And I said, this is a way you reach over to the other side and put your hand on the edge of the other bunk. That's across the hall. So I reach and I go, there's no edge and I fall. Yeah. And my head hits the edge hilarious. My head gets knocks back. I follow the ground and I'm not I'm knocked out. I eat you know, you know what I mean? I don't know what the fuck. And then this pain in my mouth, I thought I lost teeth and I open
up and I'm drenched in blood. So I take off my shirt and I put it on my face and then I go into the the first half of the bus and I go to the bus driver and I go, I got locked unconscious and I think I need to go to the hospital. It won't stop bleeding my lips. Any good? Five hours away, bud. What am I going to do? We're in the middle of nowhere. Five hours away, bud. You can't just sit there five years, five and out of way. Okay.
Like I don't want to also to my first day on the tour. Right. My bus trip goes to the hospital then all the other buses up. I don't know how it works. But there's a group text and my text I go, you know, SOS, I'll show you. I'll show you the text later. So anyway, I text everybody like so everyone's on the text at how, but then also Leanne, Christchurch, Burts, wife, everyone's on it. And I take a photo of my mouth and I go, I don't know what
to do. I'm bleeding profusely profusely. You got it. Yeah. And I'm in so much pain and I just don't know what to do. Can somebody help me? Nobody helps me. No one responded. They're asleep. It's three in the morning. Oh, right. We're on the bus. Nobody wants to fall. Chad or no, no, no. And you know, they don't like me. Yes, they do. But I'll tell you what pissed me off now. Here we go. All right. Siphah sound. Siphah. I'm sitting there. Blood drenched shirt. Okay. He's awake. He walks out
like he just came out of a fucking, you know, man. Rave. I don't know. I don't know. It's a total funny. Try it again. We'll let him. Oh, shit. All right. He walks out. It comes out of like a smokehouse crack. A crack house. A smokehouse crack. It's just crack house. No, that's even worse. A smokehouse crack. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. It's not even a house. It's much more serious. It's so it's so fucking serious.
Because a crack house is one thing. But if you're in a smokehouse crack, yeah, yeah. It's insane. That's bad. Yeah. And so he's assistant or his body, his body. God rest this kid soul. He dead. He's dead. No. Well, what the fuck was that? I don't know. Thank you. God rest someone. No, I didn't say that. I said, thank you so much. God for putting him in my life. This kid had come out like maybe a half an hour before Siphah and sat
with me. He goes, you know what? I'll stay awake and I'll sit with you. That's very nice until we get to West Palm because you didn't want to go to sleep in case you I died in case you died. Siphah comes out. He goes, Hey, go to the pee. And I go, he goes to the pee. He comes out. I he goes, I go, I go, I got knocked on conscious. I don't know what to do. And he goes tired, man. And then went back. That's all he. Kissed me off.
But what could he have done? Stay up with me. He was tired. Dude, he told you there's blood everywhere. I have no shirt. I would stay up. But the relationship is different. You don't even know, Siphah. You called him something else. You don't even know his name. Yeah, because I didn't memorize it because of the thing that he did. Oh, you knew it. Or you memorize if I know that he's going to be in my life. That's right. That makes it. There's
not a lot of room up here. You know that right? No. There's only three, like the new girl. What's her name? I forgot. Wait a minute. Let's honestly guess. Heidi. She looks like Heidi. What's the letter of your first name? De. Deanna. Whoa. It's D. I was way off mental. Deanna. No. No. Diana. I just said that. Dork. Dork. Dumb dumb. Dork us. Anyway, forget it. Whatever. So there's not a lot of that room here. So I didn't memorize it. Anyway,
we get to us palm. I haven't slept. Blood is gushing out of my mouth. I think at nine stitches. No. Nine. Yeah. That's when all the way to the bottom, Dan. Wow. Yeah. And then as soon as the button and thank God for Leanne, she's the greatest person on earth. One of the best. She runs to the boss grabs me. Panicked. I'm sure. Panicked. Yeah. See, we got to go to the hospital now. We got to go. You know, man. She's number one. She got somebody. You know, man. And then, you know,
they called the paramedics. It was the whole fucking nine yards. Wow. Right. And then I went to the hospital. Some Chinese man, you know, did it. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. It was the best. The Chinese are the best at it. The stichar was Chinese. The whole thing was Chinese. Everyone you were in China. We're trying to root Chinese restaurant. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. He have tanks. No, no, we, um, you just get some duck and get some stichar. No, because we didn't go to the hospital. We went
to like a clinic. Oh, right. And emerged. So I go in there and there's a black lady there. Yeah. Excuse me. What was that? Was that her? Where was that the Chinese guy? That wasn't the Chinese guy. Well, I can't tell anymore. My impressions. Yeah. It's not good. What did she had an attitude? He's because of you? No, that's real. I was trying to make a comedic. But did she have an attitude? No, she did. She does. Can I help you? That's very nice. That's
better. Right. And that's more real. But was there a white person in there with them? No, they were all black. And I go, yeah. And she goes, nah, we can't do that. We don't do that here because in the mouth, right? You might have to go to the hospital. But then the Chinese doctor came out and he looks at me and he goes, no, we do it now. Whoa. Like you do it now. We do now. We don't know. He goes, we don't know how? What we do it now? If you weren't Asian, do you think he would
have helped you? No. If it was me, he would have turned around hospital hospital before you go. Right. And then it's sort of, this is not a lie. Right. They had to like move things around and then look for things. That's not a good sign. Yeah. I know it wasn't. But I'm like, he's doing it for me. It wasn't readily available. No, she's like, well, that's, you know, I mean, the sutures and all that stuff. Yeah, we don't know that, you know, they don't know.
They're like looking at things. Right? They don't know. They're like scrambling. They're bringing chairs in that aren't supposed to either. I mean, right. And then she's like, he's like, there's no apparatus. He goes to the lady and she goes, he goes, all by him out. Right? So she opens my mouth. Keep it still. So she's like doing with different fingers. Right. And she's like just doing it like, you know, I call it the first blood style. First blood. We're
remember first blood when he falls off the fucking cliff. That's you. That was me. Wait. Did he, are these disappearing stitches? Are they taken back out? They're disappearing. They're the ones that mold into you. They mold in? Well, they go into your skin, right? They dissolve into your skin. Yeah, they dissolve in the skin. Yeah. Yeah. But what does that really mean? Is that it's like you think there's a scar? Could that be another? Is that another vaccine?
Oh, maybe they can actually dissolve by being absorbed by the body as wound heels, but I just don't trust them. Yeah. Because it was a Chinese guy. It could have been, you know what it was? Bamboo, probably. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. It was fucking bamboo. It's you think he helped you because you were Asian 100% if you weren't Asian, you'd have sent you away. Go go. Yeah. What if you were black? What if you were a black guy? Because the black girl was in front. No. He wouldn't even give me
a suggestion. I don't think the black girl. Yeah. We need the debt. What's the person on it? Yeah. We did. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. But he looked at me and he was like, I'm going to help this guy. He felt like he had to do it for the motherland. Right. So then I, um, I go, you know what? Alright. So I get the stitches and I'm, they're like, well, what about the show tonight? I go, I think I can do it. But I haven't slept all day. I just been bleeding into my shirt.
I'm going to go to a hotel, right? And I slept for like seven hours. Wow. I wake up and I couldn't talk. Right. You're swollen. I'm swollen and it's, there's so much pain. I'm because I'm in an A and stuff. I can't take any medication for it. Right. Except I be profan. And I just call them and I go, this is, I can't do the show. I'm so sorry. And they're like, we understand. What did it sound like? I can't do the show.
Like that. Yeah. Anyway. So they go, so I just took a flight back to LA. You came home. I came home and I just spent like five days alone just weathering through it. Have you been really? Yeah. You seem like you were upset when we talked. What was upset? Um, here's the thing. I'm grateful that I didn't hit my head. You know, like, you know, I mean, like if I hit my forehead, yeah, I think it would have been way worse. Yeah. You'd have been like Carlos. Yeah.
And I don't want to be like Carlos. Nobody does. It's insane, dude. You have a good body. Thanks, bro. But I don't have that. So I would have just your mind. It's your body and it doesn't work. Yeah. It's end game. I get that. Yeah. So no offense and no non-taken. Non-taken. Okay. Good. Non-taken. Yeah. We're going to this point. I'll take some. Yeah. Take some. I secretly took some. Take one. Leave some for other people. Yeah. Leave some.
Leave some for the other people. So, um, did you hold your pee this whole time? I? Dude, it's not like I was bleeding in my shirt. I'm like, I got to hold the pee too. I was like, no, I went to pee. That's what you were thinking about the whole time. What's going to the story? Like, what's the pee happened? Yeah. When is the bad thing? It's saying true. Did you pee? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What's like watching a movie? You just assumed that I get by just up planning the kingdom
of the apes, right? Yeah. Right. There's no shit seen, but you just assumed that they, the monkeys are shitting somewhere. I would like to see. I would love to see a shit scene. Why are they not? Why am they not showing that? Yeah. They don't show that. Because the ones that throw the shit, that's always fun. I'd love to see that. Yeah. What? You weaponize it? Yes. Weaponize your poo. So anyway, yeah, you any movie, when's the last time you saw a movie and they go,
oh, that's a good shit scene. Um, never. Not one movie you can tell me. Unless it's a comedy. Oh, yeah. I know. Um, there's no dumb and dumb. That's the only one where you can't flush the toilet. I assumed that that in pulp fiction. Yeah. Yeah. Trouble. Yeah. Right. I assume he was shitting because he took long enough. Oh, yeah. That's, yeah. That's it. The pop stars came up. So that's a good scene. Yeah. Let's think of
another really like powerful one. There's train spotting. Yeah. Train spotting. Very good. Oh, I know one. What? But I don't think he was shitting. It doesn't matter. Good. Just a good bad through. All right. So it was the guy that lawyer in Jurassic Park. Oh, really good. To the fucking owner body like a coward. Lose the kids there. Yeah. It's just a trembling. And then there's fucking the T-Rex. Oh, it's a great scene. They split them up half, right?
They split them in half. Yeah, bit of a half. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Something about Mary. Such a good bathroom scene when he zips his beans over the Frank. But you rarely in a drama or a suspense or like a. It's always in comedy. It's never in like a serious movie. Well, because the end of day Lewis is not going to poop on camera unless it's a vital part of the story. I would love to see Abe Lincoln poo though. What is he thinking when he's pooping?
Three scores, four scores. How many scores? It depends on how many shots. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He just hears like poop. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Four scores. I mean, that's the way he came up with that. Yeah. So are you good now? Yeah. I'm going to go back out two days from now. Oh, good. Yeah. I'm going to do two more and then I think I'm done. I'm done. But they, um, they've been so nice and caring about what's going on. Tour is great. You've done it. Yeah. It did last
year. It was amazing. And this one you're with Whitney. No, I was not well with Whitney. Oh, she's on it now. Yeah. I'm not on hers. I'm on another. The other leg. Yeah. Mine. Tour is with Sodor. Love Sodor. Uh, Morrell. Sam the best. Yeah. Uh, what a crew. David Tell. King. Greatest. Yeah. Um, big J. I said, big J. Oakley. He's on. Oh, for son. Yep. I love him. He's a great guy. Who else? I'm Kelsey Cook and Dan Dan. Yeah. I mean, not Dan. Matt and wait.
Why'd you say yes if I said Sullivan? What's his name? Matt. No, Chad Daniel. Chad Daniels. Chad Dan, not O Daniels. I just met him. So I don't know. Chad Daniels. I just met him. He's going to be in my new. I'm going to put his name in here. He's very funny. But psycho psycho. No. You don't like cypher sound. Psycho cypher sounds as gone. I can't memorize it. No. You know what? It's so funny because I know he called you in Scotland. Yeah. Dana. Is your name Dana? Uh, uh, okay. Yeah.
Yeah. Debbie. Uh, it's like, it's something hippie like Dandelion or something. Danica. Dormat. Denise. Denise. No, it is. Darla. No, it's Denise. Is it Denise? Okay. We'll level figure out later. Don't stop. Yeah. So yeah. Um, and I'm going to go back out. They assure me about a monk this time. You should. I would hope. Yeah. I refuse to get out of with it. It's not so funny. They made you go up top again. I follow a fill again. Who's sleeping in the back back?
Nobody. Why don't you sleep back there? You're a little bit. You busted your lip. They that because they left. Yeah. I should do that. You deserve that. And I'd make I throw a thing. Yeah. I'm going to I'm going to get bad bunk backbunk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you so much. You deserve back. What are you texting somebody? I'm going to text. I'm going to text. I'm going to text. I'm backbunk. Yeah. But you know, you know, I haven't broken a bone ever. I really haven't.
And I've never been hurt like that as an adult. So it was sort of like I was kind of like when I was healing, I was like, I'm just grateful. You know what I have? You seem so disinterested. Who? Carlos. I'm not. Why? You're such a piece of shit. I was looking at Andrew to see what he was doing. We're doing multiple things. It's fine. I mean, we are like just talking about the same injury for 20 minutes. I'm going to take it tonight. Oh, forget it. Not good for the lip. Was that the boner pill?
Yeah. Yeah. You're going to take that. Okay. This is what happened when I was cleaning the other day. If I don't get a pull at the end of this podcast, there's going to be another. There's going to be another thing coming. Morgan Morgan. I'm driving. Whoa. I'm my bad. Are you okay? No. Well, let me call Morgan and Morgan. Okay. You know why? If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan and Morgan. Because
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by going to rocket money dot com slash bad friends. That's rocket money dot com slash bad friends. Rocket money dot com slash bad friends. We're doing my pain. I was like I don't know what to do tonight because I'm not going up. So I go. Yeah. When you don't know what to do you go to the hustler store. Yeah. Everyone does generational. My family. My family's always done that in pain. And I go and they know me now. They go, hey, Bob, what's up? And you know, it's like, you know,
cheers. All right. What's up? Norm? Was you there? It was normal. Yeah. Known was there too. And they go, it's you know, you know what it reminds me of. You know, in like triple X or like bond movies, there was like, you know, me and come here and they opened up a thing and there's like these gadgets. Yeah. I have that guy there. Mr Lee come on in and you know, man, and I go and they're like, oh, we got this black market. And they have all these like, you know, there's a new toy
that I got, right? And I literally kiss it when I'm done using it. I'd already go, thank you. And I kiss it. I put it to bed. What? What's the toy? It's just a new apparatus, right? And it's so powerful and it's so beautiful. It's a suck machine. It's beyond that. It's my girlfriend. How much does a her name is? How much did it cost? They're not. I also, I went online and I bought like four of them because you know what happens is you break them. Not just the
break them. They always discontinue things. And in my mind, I'm like, I got, you know, I mean, as if it's like, you know, you know, it goes out of season itself. Yeah. Yeah. Like they're never going to make it. Let's say it's like those breakfast carnation bars in the 70s and 80s that I loved and they don't make them anymore. So I'm afraid that they're going to discontinue discontinued them. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. I showed McCone my collection. Did you like it, McCone?
I mean, I've never seen anything like it. I don't know. Oh my god. That's so good. Yeah. Yeah. He's been very, you know, also he snaps on me now. McCone, have you noticed that? Yeah. He gets a little added. No, even even when I'm running into Mad The Comrade Star, he'll snap. What does he say? And so now I know that underneath, there's a resentment. And he won't tell me what the resentment is because I don't want it to
get out of control. We know what happens when that happens. No, yeah. And I apologize for that. I, I see. What do you remember? What the snap was about? I remember exactly what it was. Okay. I took a picture of your busted lip and then you said, let me see it. And then I said, it's film. And you got mad. Oh, that's, but that's not how we said it. Can I tell you? Right? Yeah. Yeah. Let me see it. You go, it's film. And I go, whoa, dude, I just said film. Like what's the fucking anchor about?
I was just texting Leanne. I said, you got to give my boy the backbone. And what did you say? In a show with Bert, call you in a few. Okay. Probably going to discuss. We'll have to discuss the deal terms though. But I will act as your attorney for this. Thank you. Look, I just think that given my clients trauma, yeah, I just believe it's safer and better for everybody, including psychosycophonyms. Yeah, yeah. To have you removed from, from his area? No, I want to see
Seifer. And I want to say about what's him. He's a very funny guy. He's great. He's dynamic. He also DJs, right? Yeah. Yeah. He's got the whole thing. And he really is a nice guy. In fact, in the, I think he was too high. And in the morning, before I got shipped off to the, the makeshift hospital, the Chinese man, he was like very apologetic. And he was like, I was super high. I know what the fuck was going on. That's nice. And so I was just, as a joke, putting
him on blast, you know, on blast. But it worked. Yeah. But he says a joke. And he's a nice guy. He's a bright future. I'll never do anything with him. Right. Yeah. I mean, but I'm sure he'll help pay his way. Yeah. He's a, he's a, he's a way. I don't know. I guess so. Can't we only hope? I hope so. I hope he has all the fucking equipment to do that. To physically pave like, as you mean like road work stuff? Yeah, he's,
he's, his limited days and comedies. Oh, no, he's very funny. And he's just mad at me. He's a super nice guy. He was a super high. And it was like a, yeah, it was a moment. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny who, you know, when I was in pain, it's like, who called me? You did a lot. Yeah. What the fuck? And you were in Scotland. I called you from Scotland. Hold on. Hold on. Leigh, it's calling right now. Okay. Let's, let's discuss. Okay. But I do want to hear who called you. Okay.
Hi. Mr. What's up? Hey, you're on bad friends with me and Bobby. So don't, don't say anything that you usually say. Don't say crazy shit like you usually do. Okay. We have to, we have to be good with our, our audience. And I know that you're known to just say, wild shit. I noticed that my client Robert Lee is injured from your tour. I, you know, I'm attorney at law and I'm not going to take legal action, but I am going to, I'm going to fight for my client. And, and, and, oh, wait, it was
my client's fault. Yeah, it was operator error. Okay. My client tells me that the gap between his bunk and the next bunk was significantly larger than normal buses. Is this not true? I think it's about length of arm, maybe. Length of arm. Yeah. But you know that your client, but the client, how you know, his arms are not human arms. No, my clients are very much smaller than normal human arms. You are aware of that. I am now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, moving forward. So let's put
him on a bottom bunk. If you don't mind, please. I can do that. I can make that happen for you. Fair enough. You will see no legal ramifications for this. I really appreciate you and, and have a wonderful day. Now I, I can't wait to have him back. We love you. I'm me too. I know I miss you guys and I'm sending him on behalf of me. So I love you guys. Have fun. We'll talk to you soon. Love you. Love you. Bye. Bye. She's the best. She's the best. Number of fucking one. She's number one.
He, she's too good for him. For Bert. Yeah. No. What do you fucking talk? Oh, but he's good too. He's really good too. Who would you see her and you go? Wow, I get it. Every guy that's with a woman that like that is always going to be worse than the woman. Like they're always outkicking their couple. Yeah. You're going to end up with someone who's like your wife was way better than you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're going to be with someone who's way better than you. That's how it goes. Look at
fancy. Look at fancy. Above his league. His wife is stunning. Stunning. Yeah. Look at, um, that's it. That's it in the room. Yeah. That's all. That's it. And McCone, he outkicks his coverage. I mean, so does Carla. You see anybody? McCone? Not currently. Yeah. How about you, Carl? You's calling Carl? It feels better, right? Carl, are you not hooking up with anybody right now or dating or anything? I hooked up with someone last week. I don't think it will last and talking to
a couple of girls right now. Yeah. That's it. Yeah. Nothing fun. It doesn't sound fun. You sound a little low today. It's yeah. I'm not like super into it. I'm not like, I'm not like a crushing or anything like that. Well, the summer's common. Don't you want to be a little free summer boy? Like a white boy summer. Yeah. Don't you want to have a little white boy summer? Kind of, but I'm just more hanging out. He seems like I can't wait until you find there will be
one woman that he's going to go. That's it. Or man, that doesn't. I mean, what else? Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Right. Well, it could. Could it not be a guy? It could be a really handsome, like cool guy. And honestly, can you see yourself marrying a guy? Be real? No. That's illegal, isn't it? Yeah. In some places, I think. No, I wouldn't marry a man. But you are like Henry Cavill. Like if you're like, if Henry, if Superman and
Recavill goes, Hey, I want to let's get married. Would you marry him? Yes. Why? Because he's so handsome. All right. So that's the end of the rest of your life. Oh, and you wouldn't. Henry Cavill or Tom Hardy or Austin Butler. I would fuck one time for the story for the story. You wouldn't marry. No, I wouldn't. 100% now. I would marry. Okay, good. What's so funny? What do you mean? You would definitely marry. No, I wouldn't.
Shut up. No, I wouldn't. Yes, you would. I would not marry. I have security. Well, you love the fame. You would love the fame. Not as famous you. You would love the fame. You're famous. No, I'm not. Yeah, I am. And would I marry you? No. Yes, you would. No, what the fucking man. If I set it up, right? What? If I set it up, right? Operation. Yeah. No, because you know what it is. Once you smile, ever and sex and once you smile, we would
overrupt in a laugh. And we wouldn't be able to fit it. It would be too funny. Who else called you while you were hurt, by the way? Oh, here we go. So I called you from around the fucking world. Yeah. So you called obviously the people from, you know, I mean, the two were called. Right. You know, people that were close to me, like my manager and stuff, right? But no one else from this side of the my business. Really? Yeah. None of these people. I texted you.
I texted you. Never called though. Because you never pick up my call. So I texted you. In this, when it comes to lifetime injuries, yeah. And it's severe things you call. It's a call. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But he didn't reply because this is a call time. That's call only injury call. Yeah. Injury called it. You don't you don't text. I'm sorry. I didn't want to buy nothing from Carl. Carl, you had nothing? Nothing for Carl. I don't want to bother Bob. He said he called you Bob.
I I'll call you Bob. Yeah. Yeah. You call Andy? Yeah. I've never said you don't call Andy. Yeah. Big. Yeah. You hate Andy. Right? Yeah. So gross. But why? Because now because we're so close now. Can I please be like one guy to call you Andy? No. I'd rather you make up a nickname for me. No. I want to call you Andy. Make up a nickname. And no. Yeah. Yeah. Angie. Can I call you Angie? This doesn't have to be derivative of my name. It can be anything. Yeah.
Like you, you're my dumpling, my noodle, I call you all sorts of stuff. Hot link. Hot link? Yeah. Hot link. Yeah, I'll be your hot link. Yeah. Or a red hot. HT, hot link. I don't know. I wanna call you Andy. HT. Yeah. I'm gonna call you Hot Link. I know I'm Andy. I'm gonna call you Andy. No. Please. How would it be the one guy in earth? That'd be cool. And then people are like, I can call him back. No, no, this is reserved for me. Let me have the one thing with you. Make him cute though.
Make him. No, Andy's so cool. Look at, look at fucking, uh, uh, piglet. Make me a little piglet. That's better? Yeah, I'm a little piglet. But what is your thing with Andy? It just sounds too childlike or? Yeah, it sounds like, it sounds like a kid. Yeah, people, you call me Bob. I don't like that. I let you do it. Like, when I don't often call you Bob. You have though. And I don't correct you. Well, then I won't anymore. Okay. Deal. That's how offensive Andy is then.
No, I, I, it doesn't really, it doesn't bother me. Okay. It's just, it's not my name. Okay. My name would make more sense for me than that. Okay. And Carl, you don't like that. No, it's like, no, you are Carl though. You are Carl. I don't like it. I like it. Yeah, yeah. Can we do Carl? 100% yeah, yeah, yeah. You already changed. Yeah. Like, there's a guy that I know that that calls me, you know, because it's Chido, he calls me cheese. And I don't like it, but I do, I, I do like it. Is he black?
If a black guy calls you anything, yeah, yeah, it's gonna sound cooler than if a white guy says it. Right, because I have black, com, com, it's called me Chan. Love that. What's up, Chan? Like, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then like, the other day I saw post, Chrissy D, right, they were doing a baby, like, about like, who was cuter, black babies or Asian babies? Right. And Miss Pat was the guest. And she goes, she goes to her assistant, hey, you're not Chinese guy. I do this podcast sometimes.
He doesn't even know my, she doesn't, she doesn't even know my name. I know that. And she's done it. My party got so many times. That's okay, because it's just on brand on mouse. Yeah. And everybody else did that. I'd be so mad. They forgot my name. She said, all them Chinese babies look like Bobby. Yeah. That's Bobby leave. That's Bobby leave. She said, very funny. But it is true. A bunch of Asian babies and she's right. Yeah. That's true. I mean, it's collectively.
Yeah, but the argument is, um, which black babies cuter, black babies are Chinese baby? Yeah. What is do you think? Black baby. It's not even close. It's not even remotely close. But look at the one in the hoodie, dude. That looks like baby Yoda right there, dude. Did that right there, dude? I will bet on that baby over any black baby you find me. I'll find you. Look at that baby, dude. That's a, yeah, look at that one. That's what they usually look like. Yeah, yeah. It's torn up.
Not cute, though. Just give me black babies. Yeah, cute baby, black baby. Let's see. Not even close. Look at the first one. Click on the fucking first one. That's a 26 year old guy. Yeah, you're right. Look at how good looking that kid is. Yeah. He's a baby. He wrote a book already this one. He wrote, yeah, yeah. He's gonna, he's on tour right now with Matt Rife. And Matt Rife are opening stadiums. Wow. Oh my God, cute. Little black babies, number one. Number one, dude.
And then also when they have attitude, I love it. Yes. I mean, Mr. I don't know. You know, when they do that, I love it. I love it, you know, man. And then it's like, you're two. How do you know that attitude? Amazing. I love it, dude. And the Chinese one, they don't have. They don't know. They don't know. Right, do they? They don't know, dude. No. Yeah, yeah. Chinese babies. Asian baby. She was so in touch. She's probably six years old, in touch with her feelings.
She was basically, mom, I just want you to know that you know, you're the greatest and you know, I mean, feel your heart. Cute. Right. And just live in the moment like all these fuck, I was like, yeah, at six, dude, I didn't even know the English language. No. Yeah. You're still behind. I got the goal. You know, I mean, eating my burger. I mean, like, I'm, and then there's kids are like, they, they're full sentences and they, they're very mindful, emotionally developed and developed.
That's weird. Like you, you weren't like that. Like, six lunatic. If I asked you at six years old, I go, um, how do you feel about life now? I was snow far. I was at six. Yeah, you be a six year old. Yeah. Go ahead. Yeah. That way. How do you feel about life so far? Yeah, no, me too. Yeah, I'm a toy. Toy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. My dad's gone. A file. Yeah, that's it. I pull you on file.
Break, break, break, break, break, break, break, break, break, break, break, break, break, yeah, yeah, that's exactly what it is. Yeah, that's it. Ruined break, destroy. When did I even learn to even put a thought together? Probably 12 mid 20s. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a real thought. Maybe in my, like, why am I here? Well, that one is. Yeah, that one. Yeah. That'll get me. Yeah. Maybe mid, maybe teens I started to think about stuff. Before I was a teenager, I didn't think about shit.
He was living. Yeah. He was kind of going about your shit. I remember when I thought, why am I here? I was, and I know the guy's name. I was at painted rock elementary school. We were playing softball. Right? I was running from first base to second base. And you know what I mean? Kick me in the nut sack. Why? I don't know why. I don't like that. And I felt on the ground. And I remember it was so much pain. And I remember also thinking, wow, my nuts are so small, he hit it right on.
So he was a sniper, right? And I remember going, why am I here? Yeah, what's the purpose? Like what's the point of this? This is ridiculous. What's that? That's painted rock. Yeah, I lived literally five minutes from there. Painting rock. That's amazing that they have that on the internet. Oh, it's everything. Yeah, they have everything. Yeah, yeah, you forget. I guess sometimes when I go to powe, I'll drive by my house. You drive by your old place? Yeah. I drive by it.
And it just, it instantly puts me back. Do you smell something? Do you, what is it? What's the take? What's the moment that brings you back? Like what's the thought or what's the emotion? I think of my dad, I think, mainly. Like the way your dad talked or sounded. Yeah, I mean, because I talk about my life as it was kind of grim, but there were pockets of joy. And there were pockets of good memories with him, you know, and my mom, you know. What was your best memory with your dad?
My dad, my mom would yell at him like, you don't have a total of nothing. You don't ever take him enough. Nothing. Like he was not one of those guys that's like, you know, let's go to the ball game or, you know what I mean? Well, you don't have to teach you how to do this. Yeah. So one day he didn't know what to do. So he like just put me in his car and he didn't know where to go.
So he's just trying to drive around and just knew this as a kid and instinctually I go, this fool doesn't even know where to go. You're supposed to put it in father's Sunday, you know what I mean? And he just went to some like generic park with a bench. You go like this, you know, if he had me to come here, yeah, right? We get out and we just sit on this bench, right? And I remember this because he yelled at me later because I forgot my jacket there.
Yeah. But I remember being on the end of the, why, what's it, why are you smiling? I'm listening to a nice, great junior dad. So in my mind, I'm like, this is the reason why I remember this is because it was so, it was such an anomaly, right? And I sat there, we didn't talk. But I just remember thinking go, he's trying. It's really nice. It was nice, but then later he's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Where the talking? You know what I mean? Hit me, I think, you know what I mean?
But I just remember that day though, was nice. I like those moments. Yeah, do you smell, do you, do you remember how it smelled in the house? I do. Do you know what I mean when you remember how a house used to smell? It smelled like kimchi the whole time. Yeah. Remember having to tell people, you know what I mean? Get a load of this. Prepare yourself for this smell, right? And then, because my house always smells. Now when you're in it and you're like, during the summer, you don't smell it.
But then when you go to school and then you come back, you smell like regular, you know what I mean? Like classroom. And then always when you came in and go, oh yeah, here it is, you know what I mean? It's like dead, you know, a whale pussy. That's what it smells like. Dead whale pussy, yeah. What a white people's house to smell like when you were, I love it. When you went to a white house. There was a little bit of malt like with the cotton, malt balls. Yeah. Does it hit a malt balls?
I don't know. I always smell a hint of coffee. You were always drinking coffee. Yeah, a hint of coffee. And then it's always like, and I didn't know the word for it back then. Baloney soap. No. Oh my god. Pumpkin spice. There was always a little pumpkin spice. Like a hint of that kind of like, it's a nutmeggy, like you know, mean, like fall smell, which I love. It gives another has smell that you hear. And because I'm a connoisseur of white smells. I don't know if you know that. No, you're big.
I've been in many white houses. I've spent the night there, you know what I mean? And there's a little bit of leather. Yeah. And you know where the leather's from? A baseball mitt usually. We got, we leave those around the house. Do you really? I have one in every room. Yeah, yes. I always smell that. And I always talk about it when I did Naka. The college, the college thing.
Yeah. You know, I, you know, one night I was in Indiana and they're like, you have to spend the night at these old people's house in the attic for one night. And then you could have take the Greyhound bus to the next thing. All right. So I remember and they're like lights out at nine. Right. And it's no, it's the dental winter and it's cold as fuck. And they gave me a thin, like, you know, one that they fucking knitted one of those blankets. So it's like itchy.
Yeah. So I'm in this attic like this creaking, right? And I'm like, oh, there's no one to sleep. There's fucking no one to sleep, right? But I remember going, let's analyze the smells. What's in there? I tell all the things I told you about. Yeah. And that's how I'm an expert. Leather. Yeah. Leather stands out. Are you an expert of smells of people's houses? No, but I do walk into something people's house that I do not like the way it smells sometimes. Yeah. Okay. So let's say I'm Armenian.
What would you smell? I'm not coming over. Really? No. Not even to play chess. No, of course I'm coming over. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It smells like cologne. A lot of it. Yeah. So much that it's I can't, I'm a little, I can't breathe. I'm stuffy. I get stuffy. Right. I get stuffy. But what's, let me ask you something, pal. Andy. Yep. Go ahead. Right. What would be the perfect smell in the house? If I walked in. Laundry. That's smelling houses. Their houses always smell laundry.
Way too much though. Doesn't matter. Why do they use so much? I love it. I use a lot because of them. They inspire me. Yeah. I overdump. I overdump. I overdump. Yeah. I'm smell my shit. But that's why because I want to smell my shirt four days later and it still smells like laundry. Dude, they figure that out. They just overuse. I think they, it's a good thing. Yeah. That's cultural. Yeah. I love how they re-fried the bean. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. They clever, they're clever in that way.
If they're going to fry the bean twice, they're going to put in two tide pods. That's, that's the clear. Exactly. Dude, that dude, the thinking behind it. Right. Well, do twice, huh? Two times the concentration. That bottle right there. It looks like that black people love that to drink. Right. You got anything in the fridge? Yeah. We got fabulous. Yeah. We got a, that's what it sounds like. We're full of classic, orange juice. Fabulous. Fabulous salt.
Holy, that just gives you diabetes once you drink it, I think. Fabulous salt? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It gives you diet. Yeah, you die. Yeah, you die. That's what you're saying that stuff. Yeah. So I want to talk about another thing that, and I don't know what to do. I'm at my last, I'm at my last. Your last gas? Yeah. And, um, and there's nothing I can do. But you know, I, you know, I spent some money to interior design my house. I have brand new fiat refrigerator at my house. It looks great.
It looks like a movie, my house. But I can't sit on any of the furniture because of Ming. What's going on? My cat Ming decided, I don't like this furniture. So I'm just going to pee on every bit of the phone. Oh my God. She goes to every piece of furniture and just pisses on it, right? So then I go online, I go, okay, like the spray, you know what I mean? Like, you know, I mean, the anti, she loves it. She thinks it's like, oh, pee more.
Yeah, I mean, like it's almost like you, I should pee here. Yeah, right. Where the spray is, right? And we went to the hospital. You know, I mean, everything's fine, right? And I just don't know what to do. So it's just like, and I talk to Ming every night. I go, yo, dog. It's like, bro, it's like, I really do have these confidence. What if you keep Ming in one of your rooms that like it? No, because I don't, I want my cats to be free as well.
But I mean, does she do this when you're home or when you're not home? Usually when I'm not home. Well, that's right. So when you're not home, keep her in a room where she learns her lesson. Right. But then when I'm sleeping, I don't want to know. She won't do it. Yeah, I can't do it. You got to coach her through it. Really? Right, though. I mean, you do that with dogs. You got to train the cat. The cats are smarter than dogs. But she's 12. She knows what she's doing. She just started doing it.
Because she doesn't like your fucking taste. She doesn't like it. Yeah, like, you know, I don't like modern. Yeah. She's doing it. She's more of a contemporary. Oh, I see. That's what it is. Um, during the construction, we had so many people over. Oh, she didn't like it. It's dressed it around. Well, that, yeah, you shouldn't have done that. That pissed her off. Yeah, I know. But anyway, you spent the fortune and all that furniture. It's all fucked up.
Yeah, but still it's still worth keeping a cat. My cat. I love her. Well, yeah, I'm not saying, get rid of the cat. Yeah. But, you know, I, um, I do look at her and I go, why? Why? Yeah, yeah. It was so nice to come home and see my dog. Yeah, what was he like? She, she was freaking out. Freaking the fuck out. Piddled a lot. She pitles a lot when she sees me. When I come home off a road trip, I have to greet her outside because she pisses everywhere. She keeps pissing. She pisses on you.
She pisses on everything. She just pisses because she's so excited. Yeah, she pisses. Yeah, they call it pittling or coddling or whatever. Yeah. But honestly, dude, she just keeps pissing and she'll roll over on her back and I'll scratch her. She likes bellies and she'll just be pissing in the fucking all over the place. Inside the house. That's why I greet her outside. I, whenever I come home from a road trip, like a, like a, like a show or tour. Yeah. I keep, I put my suitcases aside.
Yeah. I open the door and I let her run out and greet me outside because she pisses everywhere. Wow. And it's got to be weird for someone walking by, like, look at that. That's so cute. And it's just me, Smiley and Scratch and Dog and piss on all over the place. Wow. She usually pisses all over my clothes when I come home. She does. She's excited. She loves you so much. That's hilarious how much she freaks out.
And then she'll lay on her stomach and on her back waiting for me to keep bellying her. But I don't want to keep doing it because I'm pressing on her stomachs and then she'll pee more. That brings me to this question. Yes. I lick it off or no. What is that? Yeah. Do you eat it? I don't know. I'm not. So I'm dating a vegetarian. Oh, no. What is it? Well, what? If you're now, she's bringing up, you know, you should not eat meat. You should not eat meat. Yeah. You're such an animal lover.
I mean, why can't you, you know, apply the same thing with dogs and cats to the cows and chickens, right? They'll stop. No, well, I know. And she makes complete sense to me because, you know, whenever I'm eating meat, you go and denial. You know, you think it's just that. No. I know that it's a part of a, you know, a living thing, right? So it's like, but what did it look like when it was alive? Right. Bring up a chicken. I mean, no, I'm sure this is my point.
Yeah. No, I got no problem eating that. Yeah. I got zero problem. Yeah, okay. The chicken. Chicken and fish. Right, right, right. But then what about cows? Cow. I mean, look, I could, I get, I get the argument for cows. You do? Yeah, cows are cute. They're so cute. Look at that cow, dude. Oh my God. So cute. Imagine how good that thing tastes. Oh no. Pig. What about pig? We shouldn't be eating pigs at all because they're so fucking bad for you. I mean, so shitty for you. Right. So pig.
And also, you and I are Muslim. We shouldn't be eating. We are. So Muslim. Well, and also they're very smart, right? They are. I could stop eating pigs and beef I could. But chicken. It's like, fuck that. Dumbard. I mean, that stupid fucking thing. But it still have feelings. The chicken? Yeah. I doubt it. You ever talked to one? I don't. They don't, they have no idea. It has to have feelings. They have nerves. I don't know. Look at that guy. Dude. No, that's a chick. Now to check in.
Oh, so you wouldn't eat her. I won't eat the baby. Cute. I'll eat the adults. Right. Yeah. I'm not eating the baby. Can we do like an age thing? Yeah. What's the, like, you know, like, how long do chickens live for? Generally. All right. Let's guess before you do. Oh, yeah, yeah. I would say three, four years. No, I would say 12. They last a long time? I don't know. 12 years. Five to 10. Okay. We're both wrong. Split the difference. Yeah, yeah. So at age eight. Yeah. They're edible by eight.
Midlife. Midlife, you know what I mean? What do you think? I'm eating it at midlife. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it as good though? No. Well, you think at the younger, it's better. Gross. Fancy. Fucking pervert. That's gross, even saying. Yeah. But have you ever thought about that or no? I've gone veg. Vegan to me is out of control for, I can't, but I've gone veg two times. I've tried this. I've done it for a month, a month or two stretch. And I didn't like the way I felt. I felt really tired.
So I probably needed supplemental protein that I wasn't getting and I couldn't eat more fucking beans. I just couldn't do it. So I've tried it. I think the thing I could get away with is pescatern. I could get away with just fish. Because fish I love. Yeah. If I can eat shit from the sea. So Katie fish, because they don't have any feeling. It's okay to eat fish. That's long. Because they don't have, no, that's a song. Yeah, Nirvana. What song is that? Something in the way.
It's okay to eat fish because they don't have any feeling. Is that the line? Yeah, it's okay to fish because they don't have any feeling. Yeah. You know, they probably do. That's what I'm saying. I think CricoBand would be sarcastic. Okay, what about a what about a plant? They don't have feeling. How do you know that? Because they're just like, but they have vibrations. Oh, yeah. Yeah, or like mushrooms. They're connected. They communicate. Correct. That's what I'm saying. Oh my god.
Let's just what we're going to die. Soy. Is this what the soy have feelings? Yeah, soy is a bean. It's a plant. They're all connected. Let's just drink water. Right. Does hydrogen have feelings? Yeah. So are you thinking about it? Is that why there's a? No, it's just it's a philosophical. I thought that comes up. I, I, as time goes on, it becomes harder to do. There's a certain level of hypocrisy that we're able to just bank and accept. And you have to judge your hypocrisy levels.
Yeah. Like your phone, this is made by fucking slave kids. Why are you cool with this? I know. Why do you even say that, man? You bring it up. You can't do it. This is just, this is a testament to, you got to pick what you're okay with. So if you're okay with consuming animals sometimes. That's true. You got to pick or there can be just a completely different revelation and revolution in our minds. And then we just stop all of it. We'll go veg then. I want you to try it. Try it for a while.
And just we just mine our own food, make our own food. You know what I mean? No electricity. Just go back to the old days. Yeah. It's just, yeah, who's going to stitch your lip when you fall out of a bunk bed? Yeah. Let's see. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You need it. Yeah. We need future. I just see. Yeah. I know it's hard. Well, what are you getting pressure to switch? No, I'm not getting pressure, but it's like interesting. Like we went to a hope. Yeah. And you've been there?
No, but I've seen it a million times. You know who told me about it was the Englishman, what's his name? I talked to a host. Oh, James Corden. Yeah, Corden told me. He's got a good hope. Yeah, you got to go hope. He produced a show. I was on. And we were talking about my area where I lived. And he was like, you got to go to help. Is he vegetarian? I think so. But when we go there, I'm always going, oh, this is good. Yeah. It's good food. Yeah, of course it is.
Yeah. This is lying to yourself for a girl. I'm worried. Well, it's not going to, he's not, he's going to keep eating me. Yeah. You're going to give up bulgogi? Oh, shit. Why'd you say that, son? I know what I know it gets you horny. I love bulgogi dog. You're going to give that up. You're going to give up Korean barbecue. That's like your wetest adventure. Dig bra. Yeah, you're right, man. I can't. I can't do it. Yeah, I'm just going to, I'm just a hypocrite. You're, you're allowed.
We're hypocrites. No, it's not. We're lie, we lie. We live in a lie. But it's not hypocritical to eat meat. To hypocritical to tell other people not to eat meat, and then you do it. Or you don't do that. Right. You don't say shit to other people and people make their choices. Yeah, and when, you know, when you're vegetarian, I go enjoy. Wonderful. No judgment. But they don't do it back. Well, they judge us. They look at us and they go, eh.
Vegetarians to meat eaters are the way that San Francisco is to Los Angeles sometimes. Where they're late, I get it, but I don't know. They're like, eh, eh. Oh, yeah. And we're all like, I love San Francisco. Yeah. I'm really, I'm really, I'm also, I have my car window in place. Yeah. You're a man. Nobody's not smashed in. Nobody's pooping in my car. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going up there this weekend. Are you doing cobs? Yeah, I'm so excited. I love San Francisco. Yeah, me too. I have so much fun.
Every time I go, we never did. We never did our show in San Francisco. Huh. Did we know we bad friends never went to San Francisco? No, well, then we should do. We should do. Let's just do one off. Let's do one San Francisco one. I'm so down. Let's do it. It's going to be fun. What's this? Can I tell you something before we do move? Yeah. I will say this. Yeah. Had a great time in Scotland. Oh, yeah, tell me, tell me about your ventures. It was amazing. I had a wonderful time. People are great.
The food is, and I mean this with every ounce of my heart. Great. The worst food I've ever had in my life. Yeah. It was unfuckin' real. You could be a vegetarian there, because you can't fucking eat anything. Let me guess. A lot of potatoes. No, dude.
It's, okay, when you get meat and somebody told me, I don't know if this is true, but because a mad cow disease maybe swept through there years ago and that was a popularity, they cook meat to a, it's not even fucking, it's burnt to a place where you're like, is this a character from a Batman movie? What? The pain would eat it. Fuckin' my eatin'. What are you talking about? No, it looks all cr- It looks like- It looks like- Two faces face. Did you ever see this?
You know that new Matt Reeves Batman? Yeah. Okay. This is amazing. So they cut out a Joker scene. Do you know that? No. Right? Where, um, this is Barry Kogan? Barry Keegan. Kogan, yeah, yeah. It's fucking amazing. And the Joker's face in it looks like the meat from Scotland. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So try to google what he looks like in the, um, that deleted scene. Yeah. At the end, go toward the end of this scene, right? While he's leaving. While he's leaving.
Right there, right there, that's perfect. Is that what the meat looks like? 100% that's the meat in Scotland. That's the meat in Scotland. That's the meat in Scotland. When you go home watch that scene. And that looks a little bit more tender than the meat in Scotland. Oh really? But I think it was just, it was just the food was just fucking unbearable. That's like, you know, we have 159 complications right. Yeah, right. Three of five reasons that have died in the latest society.
They were really depressed. I'm exploded in the same way as. I'm with them. Phil προ İyi? We went with them and went, I'm afraid they're bleeding again. That's right. They've gone with them. All of the fish and chips, like seven times. So, okay. Lost me. Must be the best fish and chips you ever had? No. Of course. I love fish and chips. I know what we do. We did west Old Town. That's right, all right. They get it anywhere. That's right. All right. And then they had Hagas.
I had Hagas for the first time. What is it? zoom in there. It's a savory pudding containing sheep's pluck minced with chopped onion oatmeal. Yeah, it's like minced meat in case in the animal stomach, artificial kit. Yeah. Haggis. There's no no boo there. Yeah, yeah. That was the first thing I said when we landed in Edinburgh, I said, where's no boo? Because when I was in Hungary, Budapest, all I every night at the no boo. Yeah, it was just new. You were going to get a good meal.
The meals were just weird and you know, it's just was not what I wanted. Couldn't get couldn't get a good old fashioned. What a France. Yeah. Next time. No, it's good. Where's the good what's European cities to get food? France. All of them. Italy. London. Spain. London. Everywhere. Right. Maybe not Eastern European. You know, no, I'd love so you could have me. I love some some uh uh uh uh uh uh what am I thinking of? I have no idea what you're saying. Well, I
went to check report Prague. Prague had great food. You went to Prague. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, it's delicious. Yeah. Why do you think the women over there are so beautiful? The Eastern European women are the prettiest women on the planet. I know. Aren't they? Oh yeah. For some reason, they're like the prettiest women women on the planet. Yeah, you can tell their daughters when they're American then you they'll be hot. Oh, because when they come over here, it's like there's something off. Like
whenever there's a hot girl on hinge and it says Ukraine, it's like, okay, that doesn't count. You don't support Ukraine. No, I just don't get a some car. What the fuck are you talking about? Come on, Carl. Right now. Explain yourself. Yeah. You're saying what you're saying. When you have a girl, she's super hot and then you see, oh, she's not American. It's a whole thing with her. Why? What is it? What is it? It's like it because she has PTSD from the war. No, it's like, though, like
think you're cool. Like you need the American. That that's why you need the American mind. You need to be validated by the effects. The hotness. Yeah, only like Italy or Spain, but if it's like Bulgaria or something, it's like I'm not fucking with that. It could be like a sex trafficking thing too. You never know. Could it be? Yeah. What the fuck are you talking about? What is this a girl from there that's coming here to your talk? What is website? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
What are you? Yeah. Yeah. You keep showing me this. I don't know. Like you don't know. What's her name? What's your name? Yeah. Dugan. Diggin. Diggin. What is it? Tell me. Dan Delaney. Delaney. Delaney. Delaney. Delaney. I'll remember that now because there was an old bar on Santa Monica Boulevard called Delaney's. And I think it's closed. Look up at that slow. Sorry about that. You're bad. I'm in bad all day. I'm so tired. I'm still on jet lag. I'm so
fucked up still. Where's my pill, dude? Right now? Yeah. Get him his rhino pill. Do you not want to be on camera? Handing him? Yeah. Just throw it on the table. No. No. No. Keep the change. Yeah. You keep the change. That's how it goes. You keep the change. That's how it works. That's how it works. Delaney. Delaney. That's how it works. You keep the change. She kept it. Oh, fired. She didn't know. Yeah. Yeah. We'll take it and let's roll. Okay. Hold on. That's sweet.
That's sweet. Thank you for being a bad friend.