More Money, More Problems | Golden Hour

Welcome back, everybody.

We're back Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks again for joining us today. Kathy and I just love coming back and chatting with you guys.

So so excited to be back today. Like many other days, we're going to be answering some more of your fan questions. Make sure you're submitting those. We love reading them. We love answering them and commenting, and just go to Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour and submit away.

We want all your questions and your updates.

All of it.

You know, you can also dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.

So how's how's your week been? How's it going?

Okay, that doesn't sound good.

You should see the face right now.

Yeah.

Today, let me just say today like, I am as far from paradise as you can get. Okay, I am taking a friend to the airport this morning. I leave the garage door open and we're getting in the car. I start to put out of the garage. My garage doraw which weighs like six hundred pounds because it's solid wood with metal backing, crashes into the hood of my Mercedes Dens. It it looks like you know it looks like I don't know, monkeys were jumping all over.

They usually like bounce off and stop and they go, no, this bounced and didn't and stop. It hit it.

And what happened was the handle in like several places, the handle like the release handle you know for an automatic garage. Somehow it came loose because the string was whatever,

So it's their fault.

Yeah, So I called up the manager and I said, well, I said, your your workman said, you know, we have to do better, and he goes, not we, and I said, exactly, your worker needs to do better, And would you like the name of my my uh, you.

Know, collision repair company. So my car. Really it looks like someone just pounded it. That was my fun.

Nobody got hurt, nobody got the car. It's just but you know what it's the only car I have. Did you have a good day, You're having a good week.

Yeah, it's been a crazy week.

Actually, yes, it's it's always crazy, but I'm enjoying it.

Okay, been crazy.

Yeah, but you know what that's that's that's summer in Austin. That's the way.

That's what it is here all the time. So you know, welcome to my world. All right, you're ready to get in the episode. We're going to start with the question of the day.

Here we go.

How does money play a factor in adult friendships? You know, what are some faux pas regarding money that you wish more people were aware of? Can I just say, now that you've been studying French, you know what a faux pas is.

Let's just say.

Let me just say people are clueless sometimes about about money.

Well, like for my friendships, I think friendships are just enjentships.

Like when the girls all go out to dinner, Like after work, we go out to dinner and the one girl doesn't drink at all, and the other girl has to have three espresso martinis afterwards, and that gets added to the bill.

Like, think about it.

This girl doesn't work or doesn't have as much as you have, like think about it.

So I think that's one of the faux pas that people will order the most expensive thing on the menu and fifteen drinks and then go, hey, Kathy, let's just split the bill. And I'm looking even but I have been and it cuts both ways. I think another faux pas that one is to order expensive food, lots of drinks, appetizers, and then Kathy rolls in, you know, orders a salad and a glass of water, and my bills one hundred bucks. Like what, So that's a faux pop. Be mindful of

What happened Susan, Oh, I do they get amnesia? I've lent money out, I borrowed money from you. I'm remember a good friend. It always hurts a friendship, Yeah, it always does. I mean I've had this situation quite a few times that I've lent money and I had to call every your text every pay day.

Oh, I can't do it this week. My rent is to excuse me.

Yeah, you know what happened to me with a very good friend. I think I've told this story before. And I lent the money and she said she'd paid back when she was a nurse. She said she would pay it back when she got paid in.

Six weeks now and still hasn't paid it or no.

She finally it was ugly and she said she finally fessed up and said, you have more money than I do. You you don't you have you can afford it? And I said, oh, no, nothing I know. So so that's another faux PAP thinking that when you borrow money, you don't have to pay it back big No.

Well no, I mean like when you and I are on our cruise.

I've paid for a couple of things, You've paid for a couple of things, and we'll straighten out.

But you and I are like.

That, We'll say, yeah, well it's still money and it's still with a friendship.

But not when you're both doing it and you're going away together and you're splitting.

It, you know what I mean. But I'm just saying, it's like it's you have borrow.

That's different than when we're doing something together.

Yeah. I think anyway.

I think when you go out to dinner, they'll My experience again has been men are like, let's just split the bill. Women are either what we said initially, like you know, they'll order the most expensive thing and then say let's split the bill, or they're very vocal, I only want to pay for my bill, oh, or someone says I forgot my wallet, you know, can you put it on I'll pay you back later a long time.

But I also some people if we're going to split, and one person because you and I have been in this situation, and the one person says, no, no, no, I only had this, this, and this, and they want to pay exactly that.

No, no gratuity, no tax tax no. I'm like, whoa, whoa, wow.

I don't If it's a difference of twenty bucks, I'd rather not.

Great.

Well, I'm glad well on this criticism. Thank you so much. I'll be letting you it's only.

Twenty twenty bucks until I don't worry about it, Susan, it's on you. I do think money though it can, it.

Can cause a lot of problems.

It can.

I think it's been self aware, as many things in life are. It's oh, you know what, I went to the spa. SU's gave me one hundred dollars because I forgot whatever. I need to go back to my room and catch you the hundred bucks like it just it's just being self aware. And Susan, I don't have the hundred bucks to pay you back. So thanks so much. I really appreciate me, Kathy, I do know on my phone.

Oh my gosh.

Alright, we're going to start our fan questions.

Okay, Anonymous here from Delco my area, got.

The Old Boy.

I can't wait to read this one. I need some advice. I recently moved in with my boyfriend of two years. I couldn't wait to start this next chapter. Let me start by saying I lived on my own very comfortably, within my means. He lives in a more expensive area and his rent is expensive. Now he makes more than two times my salary, but he expects me to pay half of everything. I give him half of his rent every month, and I think he appreciates it, but he

Any advice will be greatly appreciated.

Oh yes, delco, delco, delco, We love you, Kathy. What's the first word that comes to mind with the sea curb? Hit him, send him to the curb, communicate you need to sit him down and freaking tell him exactly what you told us.

You make more, you live in a more expensive place.

Yes, I like the idea of send him to the curb. This is a red flag. She's right to tell you, Delco. But I think he's earning twice the money. He's looking to have a nice situation where he listened in a nice place and you're paying half the rent if you This is why. By the way, again, listen, miss s Delco. I'm sure you're a lovely girl. I bet you are because I know people from Delco and they are all lovely people.

So here's the thing, though, if.

You moved in with him and you didn't have these conversations first, and maybe they did, maybe he earned less money. But the fact is, if you didn't have these conversations to begin with, you know, Joe, I don't earn a lot of money, and you know I'm a whatever you know whatever she does, And I don't have a lot of money. I don't have a lot of disposable income. So how are we going to work this out? Because if his life is a fair yeah, well what's fair is splitting everything down the middle?

And is she totaling up the food bill because I know grocery store are expensive.

No, but she's saying, I try to buy groceries.

The fact is, it sounds like he wants to split everything down the middle. And that's fair in the legal you know, most finite definition of the word.

It's fair.

She moved into his place, which was way more expensive than her place.

Well, and that's where she went.

We're going in. You're right.

Before going in, I would have said, Babe, my rent is not like this, So how do you want to work this?

Because I cannot afford.

Or susan, I got a really simple solution for Hey, buddy, you tell him you want sex, money on the table, charge him every time.

You'll be telling you money.

You'll be moving. You'll be moving to the penthouse here pretty soon.

I know you're thinking it'd be better to go back on your own, living within your means. But before you do that, if you really do love him, and if he loves you, he will make the time sit down and communicate and share exactly the truth always sets you free, tell him exactly how you're feeling. This okay, but I don't feel like I could keep up here. I moved into your place and he's collecting half, so he's on scott Free and makes more than two times more than you.

Then that's not fair.

I wouldn't present it like an ultimatum, but I would definitely at the end of your conversation, because if we can't work something out, I'm going to have to go, and that's an ultimatum.

Susan, Well, if we can't work, that's still an ultimatum.

I'm telling you.

I would say, Delco, you need to back up and say to him, let's test. Let's test how you know how much you are his roommate and how much you're his girlfriend. If you say to him, hey, Joe, I really do love you, but this is too much for me. I don't have any disposal income. I can't go out with my friends. I can't buy the new pair of shoes I want because you know, you earn twice what I do, sweetie, and and good on you. You've got lots of raises, but this is what I earn and

Well, that's the same thing I said.

No, no, no, don't don't, I will give I will move out. I would move out, and I would say, you know, if things change, we become engaged, whatever. But right now, this take I guess what I'm saying to her is take charge of your life, be responsible for who you are, for your expenses, and you know, don't expect him to say, oh, that's okay, sweetie, I'll cover everything.

Yeah, well, you know, what is that how she wants to live?

What he may say it's okay to move out? No, no, no, no, that he'll pay more.

I say it. Does she want to be a kept woman?

I don't know. I think these are things women. She's still going to pay her way, but just not right.

I think the I think the lesson here is miss Scalco, lovely woman that you are, and to everyone else listening, have these conversations.

Before you move in.

Don't wait until you're knee deep in it, and it's going to get ugly.

I mean that that was a simple question.

So let's talk about what you expect from me.

Like if I move into your house with you, Susan, I mean I can't because Frederick is probably going to be there.

But let's just say, you know you have the master. I'm being serious.

Let's just say we were two girlfriends, friends that we are, and I decided to move to Philly. And yeah, I'm making this all up obviously.

Would you expect me to pay half of everything because you have the mask paid for?

But I expect you to pay rent? Yes, yes, but I'm sayingbody that lives here with pay rent? Right.

Yeah, But here's the thing. When you're young and they all have expenses, then you have to sit and do a budget.

I bet they against Can I afford it?

Yes?

She so, Delco. You should have done that. You should have seen if she didn't. But she is now she is let us know, let us know how the conversation. Susan's right, how the conversation rent?

Right, nast and so.

Yeah, Susan listened, Delko, you know you might want to move over there?

Well, let me tell you the pool you get.

But here's the thing.

When she's home, she'll cook for you, she'll grocery shop, she'll straighten your hair for you.

It's really just have to be really neat.

Oh god, no, you have to beyond really neat. I hope you don't mind. While you're eating, she's going to be sweeping the floor underneath your chair. But other than that, thank you so much for writing in and we good luck. And you know what, I hope that the love with that you have for this man, I hope it, you know, continues. But work it out. Try to work it out, all right, Let's move on to question number two.

Hi, ladies, I need some advice.

My friends and I are all recent college graduates, all working our first full time jobs. Most of us make stable money, while our friend Tilly makes well over six figures as she works in finance.

Here's the deal. Tilly is the.

Only person in our group that nickels and dimes us for everything, and there.

It is always the way.

For instance, everyone else pays for drinks, calls cars, et cetera, and never requests money because we all know it's a constant flow of us getting things for each other.

Well that's a mistake anyway.

However, anytime Tilly buys anything, she charges us for it immediately. Some of the girls have tried to talk to her, but she always just says, just request me and I'll pay you back. It hit a breaking point when she Venma requested us each one dollar and thirty seven cents exactly for uber to go to someone's house for dinner. It was an uber to our friend's birthday dinner, and she also requested the money from the birthday girl. Is this friendship break up worthy since we've tried to talk

Okay, Susan, can we answer this one in unison?

Man a dollar thirty seven? I would give her pennies?

Susan would so No, Susan would venmo you a Nickela day, a nicola day for the next Oh jeez, let me just say there is something wrong. It's ridiculous. There's something wrong. First of all, yay, Tilly.

That was my grandmother's name.

By the way, she's making great money.

Yeah, six figures right out of college. It's the name Tilly. I love it tight, whatever it is, she said. Some of the girls have tried to talk to her, but she always says, just request me and I'll pay you back. Here's where the problem is. Remember I said earlier day, not request, no, no, no, Remember neither a borrower nor a lender. Be Remember I said that. Here's what she said.

Yeah, it is.

That's your problem.

Because if you don't have a kiddy, if you're all going out for dinner and you don't put the money in the kitty to pay for the ubers and the drinks, whatever, you got a problem.

You got a problem if you if.

You say, oh, it all comes out in the wash, well to Tilly, apparently it doesn't come out in the wash.

And so so what do you think, Kathy? Is it something that you you know?

Wait, since wait, some people don't know what a kidd is. We got to tell what a kidd is. A kiddie is you put your money together, you put it in a wallet, and it's where like a group of girls are going out, you say, let's each put fifty Yeah, let's each put fifty dollars in the kiddy. And that's what everyone pays that night for. So one person's responsible for managing the money, and that way, nobody is quote paying for things and it all comes out.

In the wash.

Everyone's paying and equal share. That's the right way to do it. So I would I would tell people that try that would kill it. Yeah, before you break up and say, you know what, we're gonna do it differently. Now when we all go out, we're gonna have a kiddie and everyone's going to put in and decide what the number is, and none of this venomoulater stuff.

Cash on the bare head, right, cash.

Pennies a dollar thirty seven.

It's going to be heavy, and I give her one at a time because that is bullshit.

She is being an ass. If you ask me, I mean, maybe let's catch up for the birth, says.

I'm going to play the devil's advocate here for a minute. She's earning six figures. You know what, maybe chilling thirty seven? No, maybe Tilly is Maybe Tilly's trying to prove a point.

We don't know. We're only getting one side of the story.

Maybe Tilly has paid for several rounds of drinks and the girls and the girls.

Alike, you think the girls would have said that.

Maybe maybe not. I mean, we're only that's why they have courts of losses.

You're living, darling. You don't look good right now. You're making a lot of money and you're to send it a text that you want a dollar third. You're not hearing what I'm saying. Maybe I'm hearing and I'm reading and I'm listening.

But maybe Tilly, No, maybe Tilly has paid more than her fair share, and maybe she's tired of it.

Some of the girls have tried to talk to her. Anytime Tilly buys anything, she charges them immediately.

So no, she has not picked up the tap.

You don't know that.

It says it right there, and ink it.

Says she's the only one who nickles and dimes. But she goes on to say, Susan, Darling, that we all just kind of flow. The money flows because we all pay for things. That's the problem right there.

Con don't do low of us getting things for each other. How getting things for each other, don't do it. However, when Tilly buys anything, she charges them immediately, So well, do her own tab. If you still want to be your friend till you're on your own, do your own thing or not.

I mean, I honestly, I honestly would probably cut you know, make her listen to this podcast and say yes, and so Tolly congrabs on your six figure job. We would love for you to take Susan and me out for drinks and you pay, and we will each them you one dollar and thirty seven cents as our contribution to the evening.

And a lot of times we go out and you buy around. I'll buy the next round, Nancy will buy the next round.

It's all fair.

It's all even when everybody's doing the same thing. If one person's having a coke and two people are having champagne, you know, it's different.

And that's why and that's why money back to the question of the day, that's why money becomes an issue because we don't know the you know, the elephant in the room here is you don't know who has money and who can afford it, who's the last of the big spenders, and who really is on a tight budget, And damn it, I cannot afford to buy Susan too, martiniz tonight.

You know, you don't know.

It's funny.

I'm the one that's on the tight budget and I end up picking up the tab for so many people because they hesitate, and then I feel uncomfortable.

I always do it.

Okay, wait, I have to tell you I went out for drinks. This is so funny. We're having this conversation today and you know the girls. I won't mention her name, but what my friend's here. She I went out and met her for drinks. And I had been out for lunch with a friend, and so I wasn't hungry, and I had some chips, you know, that were on the table, and I had two drinks and I said, let's split the bill, because I'm like you, God forbid someone call me cheap. She goes, no, no, no, you just had

Twenty eight dollars.

That guy got a hell of a tip. Or she put a lot of money in her life.

Would have been good. And she took it right.

Oh, yes, she did, see what I mean.

But I'm just saying you and I are kind of the same cloth, like God forbid. Oh that's Susan Knowles, she said. Damn, yeah, I don't ever want to be that.

Well, we wish you lucked out.

Let us know, because I really really would like to send her a Vemo charge for a dollar.

Hey, Tilly Kelly, listen up, girl.

I love your name. It was my grandmother's name. But you got to stop being so cheap either nice. Say to the girls, hey, I'm treating tonight, and then stop nicol and diming them. Just do one nice thing for your girlfriends, because you know what, the girlfriends are worth so much more than the dollar thirty seven they're paying you.

It's so true, all right.

By the way, Susan today, Wait, Susan, Yes, why haven't you paid I? Venmo requested you two dollars and ten cents. You have not paid me yet.

I would laugh at you, Okay, I know, its just literally laugh. Today we're going to be doing a Golden Spotlight segment, so there's no games today, Kat. It's a Golden Spotlight segment where we talk about something that impacts the golden community. Today, we're going to be talking about scams. I mean, how about how they get over on so many elderly people I mean are golden okay, okay, and we're very proud of it, and we preach to everyone

So here's the thing I think golden's and and honestly, I don't put myself or you in this category because I think you and I are more aware of because we're on social media. We you know, we keep up a little bit more than some everybody, right, I will, So I think that's why, because golden people don't always know they can't hear's. I'll tell you a story, true story. My mom, my stepmom who passed away two years ago, who was really my mother. She got scammed. I'm not

It did now Western Union. There was a settlement.

There was apparently there was some insider you know bs going on, and she did recoup some of the money. But when I said to her, you know, I sat her down and I said why, She said, I don't know. I just thought maybe he didn't want you to know.

Said the first reactions to help your grandchild exactly.

And I said, so, so that's part of it.

They they even on the phone they say it's the I R S, or I do it.

I get it from Amazon, saying I like.

What I think because it. People didn't grow up, Susan with Amazon. They didn't grow up with click here for your delivery date. You know.

Oops.

They now have your contacts and they've you know, they've they've gotten into your bank account.

I R S. The I R S will never ever send you a text message.

Either, either does the electric company saying if you don't pay five hundred dollars right now, they're turning off your power. And so the thing that we can do PSA is say these things over and over.

But I think it's I believe everything.

Check it out first before you give any money or your bank account or your social Security number.

Right.

But here's the thing that I think they're victims because many Golden people are not sophisticated with technology today, and so they believe it when you know, some creep reaches out and says we're going to turn your electricity off and it's one hundred degrees out, they believe it because they can't imagine how somebody would have gotten their number, because they don't understand technology. And I think that is if I had to give the single biggest reason that

But I do love AI and more Goldens should use it because your questions. You don't need encyclopedias anymore. I don't even think the modern day child here and there's what encyclopedia is.

I use GPT constantly.

Well, it should be Gemini. I'm a Google girl. It should be Gemini you're using I don't. I don't use it because I'm I'm a writer and I don't need help writing.

But it's not about writing that answers a lot of questions.

So Google, I mean, I just.

Do things like it's like Facebook, going the Instagram, you know what I mean.

It's like here's your step up. But it's the way of the future. And you you're right.

Goldens don't trust more modern things because they're not used to it.

Lucky, I don't.

I don't think it's that they don't trust. I think I think they do trust, Susan, that's the problem. They trust it. They don't understand that that the goodness, the good parts of AI or technology and technology to use it can be abused to to scam you out of money. And so how many times locally, Oh my god, I hear it all the time on the I get them all the time on my phone. You know, click here, and you know what they'll do. They'll copy like it'll look like Amazon.

Uh.

But here's here's here's what I say to people when you the first way to get a scamp to cite one is when you get an email and there's no picture on the on the on the thing, there's no picture of a person.

And the email is some bizarre email.

It's not Gmail dot com, it's you know ITBX, it's a bot and so you know, people, but again, goldens don't know how to look for that stuff. You and I do, because.

A lot of times they're doing it by phone. They're calling them.

Well, you know what the answer to that is, Susan PSA number five for the day. If you do not recognize the phone number, do not answer it. Let it go to voicemail. And then if you have any question, you call one of your kids, call a younger person, say I got this call.

Do you know they leave a detailed message like these scammers I've had, and I'm laughing listening to it.

A couple of times I thought twice.

Like you know what I've done, I've called them back when they say your you know your tax bill is late. Well, I happen to know my tax bill is never late. And so I call them back and I start whimpering, going, I'm so afraid.

What do I do?

Oh, we're going to help you. Oh no, I keep them on the phone. So I figured the longer I keep them on the phone, the less time they have to screw with somebody else's life.

They should all be hung I'm telling you, well, you know what. It's taking advantage of seniors.

It's just not right.

I think taking advantage of anybody is true. And and but get ready buckle up because scams with AI are about to you know, multiplis so Golden's. If you're listening. If you're not sure, don't answer the phone. If you're not sure, don't open the link. Never open a link unless it's from your children. And you'll know what their email is. Just don't when and down ever, do money.

Don't give them bank accounts, social Security numbers. Be sure, go check with someone else.

How about the skim weight? Can we talk about the love skim Since we are talking, we do love to talk about dating. How about the.

People they have a friend? Many times I have a friend who actually.

Never, She never said money, but she fell in love with a tall, dark and handsome guy who was not tall, dark and handsome. He was in jail in Nigeria. I was, I mean, it was like, are you kidding me? So you know again, if you're if you are desperate for love, not take do not take two people that email you out of the clear blue and tell you they love you and they want to marry you and they live in Nigeria.

Not a good idea.

Well, I hope we helped you, delco and till that person get it together with your dollars, tell you you're gonna be okay, Just open up your wall a little and all.

Our goldens pay attention.

Don't get taken advantage of because it's so done so often it's.

Sad scams and let word, I know scam. And this has been fun.

Right, always fun with you, always fine. I love you, I love you too. Listen, be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we have new episodes and new scams coming down. No scams here, no scams, but we have new episodes coming out every week. You don't want to miss them. We love hearing from you, so you know what to do.

We absolutely do and make sure you submit your questions. You can go to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or just dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.

Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app, or wherever you listen to your podcasts until next time.

Next time, have a great week,