Hello and welcome back to Authentic One Air with Bruce Alexander. I am your host, Bruce Alexander. I can almost guarantee you this will be a topic that I will have to come back to in the future because I feel like dog crap today, which is becoming more and more common. And I'm starting to wonder if maybe there might be something larger that I have to deal with. I'm not going to deal with it right now today, so I'm not going to get too deep into that. But the topic of today's episode is...
Impulsive faith I have taken on this idea of being impulsive as a positive and not only Trait but as an identifying characteristic is being impulsive is become part of my identity and I have also pretty recently gotten pretty close to God and so these two ideas of faith and impulsivity I was trying to decide if this is a thing that these two are complementary or if they're incompatible. And I wanted to explore that a little bit on today's episode. But first, let's catch up.
And last week, since we last spoke, my body feels like it's falling apart. Like that's, you know, I'm doing all of the things that I've been committed to doing, you know, walking every day. doing some stretching, trying to get my body in a place where it's not falling apart and it feels like it is more falling apart than it was last week. It might just be my mental state, but it definitely feels like I feel like crap and I'm constantly trying to fight off some sort of sickness. So not ideal.
Doesn't mean that I don't see that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It just means that on some days it is dark and I will keep moving through the darkness till I can see the light again. and then I'll still keep moving because that's what it means to be a, um, unshakable person.
You just keep doing the things regardless of the outside or external influences you keep doing the things that you know are going to move you towards your goals and that like my physical my body goals mean that I just have to keep moving every day. Today I have slept a lot today but I still got up and I took a very short walk because I know that I don't want to lose any days. I've lost so many days in the past that it's just not really acceptable to me anymore to lose days.
I just want to get something in. And that has been done. So, pat on my back, whatever. It's all about getting towards that ultimate goal of being a more fit and active father and being able to not have to try so hard to be active. And that comes with shedding a little weight, getting a little more active. You just do it. Things with...
God has been like I said that we've gotten much closer but in this time of moving and stepping out on faith and doing this this big grand gesture like I feel like I'm I'm trying to date God and this is the this is me doing the massive like say anything moment of standing outside God's door holding up the radio is taking my family out to move into the wilderness without too much of a plan. because we feel like God is calling us out of Oklahoma. So we have moved out of our house.
The movers picked up everything today and has put most of it in storage. We are, I would say built high speed, low drag at this moment. And we are kind of going to be testing the road out and seeing what makes sense as we go. Right now we're in Tulsa. I don't know where we're gonna be next week. And that is, that is. a faith move. We are waiting for things to start making sense because we knew that this was something that we wanted to do.
It's something that we both desire to get out of Oklahoma. We both felt called to do. So we're doing it without a plan. I mean, I guess that we do have a plan. The plan is to like listen to God's urging and follow where it feels like we both can agree we're supposed to move.
And, you know, as exciting as that is it's still a little scary at times and we're hoping for some Some type of direction soon because we're ready to go They're speaking of which two is just here So but it's it is It's been a little harder to feel as close to God because there's been so much going on like my morning routine has happened every day, but it has been much less of a morning routine and much more of a like throughout the day getting things done.
And so I feel like my mind hasn't been as clear to get that connection with God, like I've been getting in the morning. And I would like to get back into that. But right now there's we're in Tulsa and there's a lot of responsibilities here and I'm, I'm excited to get back into some sort of routine into which we are not being called upon so much.
Oh, As much as I enjoy the people and I'm happy to see them, I feel a little spread thin trying to homeschool, pack unpack, do all that stuff, keep some sort of normalcy going for the kids and also for myself. I don't feel like it's really... We haven't figured it out. We haven't figured it out yet, but it will happen. Right now, Kate and I are finding a new depth in our relationship. We're having to face some things that we have faced before poorly.
As a couple, we have tended, it has tended more towards the push each other away side whenever stress has happened. It has acted as a wedge for us and we're starting to lean more into being pushed closer by stress. And it's really exciting for me.
I don't love the stress, but I love the effect of feeling closer to my wife in those moments, being there for her and supporting her whenever her anxiety is an issue or whenever there is... A lot of pressure coming from her family, being able to support her in a way that before I didn't really do. I wasn't very good at seeing her side of the story and seeing how her feelings were important. I just wasn't. I was not very awake to that. And that's something that I've been much more in tune with.
And I've seen a lot of fruits from that. I've definitely felt closer to her and I've started to feel her look to me as a person of trust in those moments versus an opponent. And that is really something that is highly prioritized in my book now is I don't want to be an opponent with my wife in stressful situations anymore. I want to be a team. Team Alexander, all the way. And it is looking more and more like that is the case. But things are going to get more and more stressful.
And I just have to remember that my job is to show up unshakable in the truth and keep my desired goal of wanting to be that support for her. whatever she is saying, whatever she's going through, like I want to be that support. So that means I can't get sucked into my emotions in that moment. I have to remember what my goal is. And that is something that can be really difficult at times, but I'm learning more and more how to do it better and better.
So the business right now is, you know, I've got my clients that I'm currently seeing doing that on the road. We'll should be fine as long as we're not, you know, I'm being Proactive about blocking my schedule out when we're actually like actively traveling because I can't see clients while I'm in the car You know traveling with a bunch of kids that would be really unprofessional But you know, I'm like I've got my mobile studio set up here.
It'll be just as easy to see clients What has been hard it has been? switching gears and Like I said doing the homeschooling the packing unpacking feeling like I'm just not getting my routine done and finding the comfort to get the work done that I'd like to get done. I'm trying to build a new webinar to help bring new leads in that is based on the impulsive philosophy. And I'm really excited about doing that because it makes a lot of sense.
I really believe in this core philosophy of trusting your inner voice and allowing it to lead you to purpose and things that you're passionate about, like things that truly matter to you and allowing that to remove a lot of the... the self -doubt and indecision that comes with being ADHD. I think it's a great move. I think that this is the key to kind of blowing my business up.
And I think that because I think it's the key, I'm both making it too important, like it needs to be perfect before I work on it, but also like I'm kind of scared to like open the floodgates while I'm on the road without any sort of routine. Because if I were to have five more clients right now, trying to schedule them would be. a nightmare because I don't know where we're going to land next. So that's, you know, wow, that's super long. So, and not knowing where we're gonna land next.
So that is something that I'm currently trying to work my way through and I'm going to just start trying to work on my webinar slowly instead of just like not working on it at all or trying to finish it all tomorrow. I'm just gonna keep putting work in, doing good solid work to build this webinar out in a way that makes sense. And that's something that as ADHD adults, we often forget that there aren't only two time periods. It's not right now or never. It can be some now and some later.
It can be a little bit now and a little bit in a little while. There's so many different ways that can be balanced, but we get so used to doing right now, right now, right now, or it's never going to happen, or we have to do it all, or we're not going to do anything that, I mean, that's a really, it's a really toxic mentality for us to have, but we get really entrenched in it. And I don't. I know that that doesn't work for me in this type of situation.
I cannot finish all this webinar where I'm at, what I'm doing, but I can keep working on it. And so that's my goal and that's what I'm gonna be working on over the next week or two. I'd like to have it, you know, the ideal goal would be to pick up doing webinars again next week, but I feel like that's probably the right now goal. Two weeks I feel like is very fair.
And allows me some time to do it well and then start bringing in clients again and that's the goal so Anyways back to today's topic and this is gonna be pretty short like I said I'm probably gonna need to do this again because I I just want to get through it today is like it not very I'm not in it. I do feel better just being here and talking about it But I'm not super excited to be recording a podcast right now because I'm exhausted My tonsils are swollen. I feel crappy.
I You know, I'm wondering, do I have some sort of autoimmune disease that's going to keep me incapacitated for the long term? It's been kind of freaking me out a little bit. So that's something I'm concerned about. But I have faith that God gave me this body for a reason and that there is something I'm supposed to learn from being in this state that I'm in right now. And I think the thing I'm supposed to learn is keep going. Just keep going.
Like I've got this plan in place that is going to help me earn all of the things I've ever wanted in life. If I just keep doing the simple things every day and then your body starts to play tricks on you. Your mind starts to play tricks on you and starts to make you question the plan. It's really important to have faith. But then also I want to be impulsive. I want to trust my inner voice. I want to trust my gut and my urges. I think that it's really important.
to understand that these two things can coexist. For me, my faith in myself and my faith in God have been strongly intertwined as I've started to uncover this, is that I have faith in myself because I do feel like God has imbued me with certain talents and gifts and abilities. And so whenever I'm trusting myself, I'm trusting that God gave me the sovereignty. to be able to make these decisions for myself. He imbued me with a certain amount of strength that I've been taught to separate from.
And I think that it's really important that I stop listening to mainstream society that tells me that the ADHD brain is broken, and I start listening to what is in my heart and tells me that there is something special out there for me if I trust myself. If I believe that I'm good enough, and I actually listen to what I have to say about the conversation, then there's something really special for me.
So, I don't know, some like currently the biggest move of faith and, and in Paul it's been, this move has been something that has been something that we've been discussing for years and I wasn't able to have the conversation because it meant destroying the life that I lived.
And well, Ended up that the life that I lived got destroyed anyway, so that felt like it was a sign from God to me to Leave behind everything I knew and then as I started to have this conversation with my wife about leaving, Oklahoma the urge happened it stopped being a Responsibility, I felt like I needed to fulfill or even just a calling from God to come out it started to feel like something that I wanted I deep inside of me.
And sometimes I don't know if it is like which came first, the chicken or the egg, if it was a calling first and it was urged second or if those things are the same thing. Is the calling inside of me or sorry, is the calling the urge just like manifested? I don't know. They feel different. Like sometimes I feel like it could be two sides of the same coin.
But I feel like whenever they Whenever they align and I feel the calling from something greater and I feel the urge from inside myself, like there's no doubt that I'm on the right path. And then I'm seeing signs that are showing that things are lining up for me, that this is the path that is supposed to be happening. And, you know, that's, it feels like at times I'm making myself like hyper important to think that God is. taking such care to put these signs in my life and to talk to me that way.
But if I think about what God means to me and that he is omnipotent and he is all knowing, all seeing and all being, it doesn't make any sense to put any limits on what his capabilities are. And that's something that I used to struggle with really hard as an agnostic like I was for a long time is that I... Well, I know if he could do this and he could do that, then why didn't he do this? And why didn't he do that? And like, for one, he can do anything.
He can, like he's he's able to do anything, but that doesn't mean he's going to do everything. He is like he's got a plan that is. It's timeless and we think we're thinking about our tiny little span of life. And why isn't this happening for me? Or why isn't this, you know, why did this happen to this person that I love? And there's this millennia long plan that we can't see the whole big picture.
And I think it's important to realize that when you feel called, it is because it is your time to step into your part of the plan. When you start to feel those urges, it is because it's your time now. There is not always going to be a time whenever you are going to have a role. that is affecting the plan. And that's okay. A lot of people are, they go their whole lives and never feel called to do anything.
And that sounds depressing to me, but also being called to do something is stressful as fuck. Like feeling like you have to ignore what everybody else says and what you, that you have to believe in yourself no matter what, that this is the thing you're supposed to do and you need to make it happen. That's kind of scary.
But whenever you're impulsive also and you know that you can trust your inner voice, that you can feel those urges and you can lean into them and you can gain power from inside of yourself, then it becomes less scary because what everybody else says doesn't matter anymore. Like, I'm not going to say it doesn't matter. I mean, of course it matters. Of course you still care to some degree, but whenever you really trust yourself, You are not going to let what they say affect how you act.
It might change how you feel to some degree, but you are going to do what you know that you have to do because you are going to listen to what is coming from inside you versus what is coming from outside. And that is, I don't know, that's. That's pretty like heady thinking, it's, you know, kind of lofty, but when you feel it and you understand it, like there's no, there's no unfeeling it. There's no un -understanding it. It's just, you just, you just do that.
And that's why I'm able to come on this, you know, podcast and talk to the 12 people who listen to it. Because I, I don't care if they agree with me. I care that I'm listening to what's inside of me and I'm sharing that because I know there is somebody else who needs to hear it. And the more I get comfortable with and the more I articulate that, the more people... are coming back to me and are commenting and are engaging with and are having conversations with this.
And I think that's what's important. Both the people who are talking shit and the people who are taking inspiration from it, it's the conversation that needs to happen. People need to start asking questions about, is this voice inside of me a real thing? Is this urge that I feel, is it the self -critic or is it the inner voice? people need to start thinking about that and sifting through that and having a relationship with that.
And if you are an ADHD parent, I think that the more you listen to it inside the constraints of the code of telling the truth and then having a compelling vision that you're trying to gain, then it becomes really, really powerful. But trying to do it, just trying to listen to your urges all the time is really dangerous. Like without... faith without structure, then your impulses could easily lead to ruin.
And so that is what I've what I've done is put a structure in place for me to to have my shit together before I just go out and live impulsively. I have my body being balanced and business in check at all times to where I know that I'm doing the right things. So whenever I'm listening to that urge, that urge, I can tell when it's off. I can tell when that's not something that I'm supposed to follow. That is my self -critic trying to destroy me versus my inner voice trying to guide me to purpose.
Because they both exist inside you. You know, we have this constant dialogue inside of our head that neurotypicals don't have. And that's what I think is like, that's why this impulsive thing is geared towards ADHD parents, because I don't think that... It is really in the wheelhouse of neurotypicals to be impulsive. So I don't know. I'm going to wrap it up because I just... This is all really important stuff to me, but at the same time, I don't want to get too far out there in this format.
It's kind of a, it's something I just want to introduce this thought to you of, do you have faith and do you listen to your inner voice? Like that's the question. If you don't have either, why not? And if you are... wanting to learn more about listening to your inner voice and living impulsively, then I would love to have a conversation with you.
Go to www .impulsive .life forward slash consult and get a free consultation where I will give you at least three free strategies to help you start living impulsively. That means to uncover the powerful potential inside you where you are able to release the regret, fear, shame, and guilt that have been bred into you. for being an ADHD person and learn to live with power and potential. That's it for today. We're gonna wrap it up there. It's not making a whole lot of sense.
It could tell I feel a little sick, but that's today's show. Bye everybody.