KiKi L'Italien: I'm the host of Association Chat KiKi L'Italien. And today I want to do a mini episode. It's a special episode, not just me talking no special guests, it will be a short one, about trust and associations trust and associations. Now, why did I want to talk about that? It's one of my absolute favorite topics. I love speaking about it. I deliver a lot of keynotes
and presentations in breakouts and workshops about trust. And I ask a lot of questions about it. Because I study it, I read it, I obsess about it. And the reason why is because no one actually pulls you aside in school, at least not when I went through school, to teach you how to proactively go about developing trust, you might learn about interpersonal communications, you might learn about maybe even creating a culture of safety, which would be advanced, I think, but needed in this day
and age. But very rarely do you go about proactively learning how to demonstrate and cultivate trustworthiness in your interpersonal relationships and on behalf of brands and organizations? And because this is a favorite topic of mine that I teach about, and I talk about, I actually asked this question as a question of the week in both the Association Chat community this week, but also, at big red M, which is, many of you may know that I'm the VP of Marketing and community
engagement there. And wanting to find out like, how does trust work with the way that we work with associations. And so many of you have already responded. And that was just posted yesterday. So within 24 hours time, I've received over 15 responses, and all the different places where this has been
posted. And I certainly have heard and seen different types of stories being told so many times countless times leading up to asking this question, but I thought for today's Association Chat podcast, because I am trying to create a more consistent schedule and come to you every Tuesday. Typically, I have a guest every Tuesday this week, I did not and so I thought, let's talk about trust. Okay, so what about trust? So
who cares? Why is it important? If we have it? I think one of the first things you either have it or you don't, I don't know that you can build it, it takes a long time to build it. I mean, some all of this can be true. But is all of this true all the time? No. You either have it or you don't. Kinda or maybe you have some level of it. And it's all about demonstrating why you deserve more. It takes a long time to build it not
necessarily. There are countless of exam, countless examples of why somebody decides that they're going to fast track trust. And we have so many examples of it that we can't say that's always true. Sometimes you can fast track trust. Sometimes you have to like when you decide that it is safe to get into that. Uber, you're making a trust decision. But there are certainly things that help lead us down the path. Now why is it important for us to cultivate trust? Why is it
important for us to even ask about this? Because as you have times of uncertainty which that phrase coming out of the pandemic, we've definitely heard ad nauseam. When you have societal changes taking place, technological changes taking place, lots of questions being asked, you're going to have even more questions being asked this is just the way that it is because people are trying to establish what is true, and what
can they trust. Now for associations, the role that associations play, part of an associations value proposition are the three C's, and it's the commitment, the content and the community and ostensibly with that comes trust that we can
trust what an Association puts out there. Because we have things like peer review, or because we have a curated set of members or leaders in a position, who will make sure that decisions are being made properly and that the organization is representing the industry or science or whatever profession in a way that is in keeping with its mission. So there's this idea that associations are supposed to be
more trustworthy. So that is, first and foremost, one of the big The things we want to establish why we why it's important. But beyond that person to person, human to human, it's important because there's this need for belonging and survival. And if we don't trust the people we're around or the groups that we're affiliated with, that creates chaos, it can create inefficiencies, it can create all kinds of things, the CYA, which is cover your applications, I'm just going to
make this family friendly. That creates inefficiency. And it definitely can create a more toxic environment. But unfortunately, can sometimes be a necessity right now, I think that this is an interesting question for us to ask about ourselves independently, because we need to think as individuals, how we are acting in a way that can demonstrate trustworthiness on a regular basis. One of these things that you can do that's relatively easy in the grand
scheme of things, but not maybe easy. As you're setting about doing it in our day to day busy lives, is consistency is showing up when you say you're gonna show up creating a pattern. Humans look for patterns. When we create consistent behavior, we create behaviors and patterns that other people can believe in. And they see that as proof of our trustworthiness as evidence if you're going to check the box for
trustworthiness. There you go, you've got one really great piece of evidence, what do you think about the way that trust and associations intersect or how trust what role it plays in the work that you do in the association industry, I can share with you what some people have been sharing on the different Association Chat channels, and also internal to big red M, not sharing names. If you're part of the groups, you can go to those groups and see it for yourself. But over on
Association Chat, on LinkedIn, we had a great comment. And this person said, Without trust, we have nothing we need to trust our members, and they need to trust us trust on teams is imperative six to success. That's the key to providing outstanding member experiences, elevating the professions we
serve, and enhancing our relevance. Absolutely. This trust on teams part is so key because obviously, when you're talking about associations, a lot of times you're thinking about, how are we cultivating trust with our members and our
volunteer leaders in the public at large. But we also need to be thinking internally about how we're cultivating trust amongst ourselves like with our own teams, and a lot of times, that's where a lot of this strain and struggle can come up, when there is too much of a cya culture where people are afraid to send emails or to take chances on new ideas, because taking that risk is just too much of a risk. And they're afraid of things being shot down or of having some sort of
retribution, come against them. This is something that gets in the way of making change. It's something that gets in the way of innovation. It's something that gets in the way of creative
thinking. All of these things are problem solving behaviors and ways of thinking that we really need to begin to figure out how to embrace more of that and to make our teams and our associations and our companies, the types of places where people feel safe enough to be able to raise their hand if there's a problem, to let others know if there is a better way to do
something to offer up ideas and suggestions. Not that those things need to happen right away, but just that they'd be considered and just that for sure that somebody isn't ostracized because they've ventured to have a new idea. Some other ideas, some other thoughts that we heard from people over in the Association Chat group on Facebook, somebody wrote, as a consultant, I strive to build trust with my clients,
but they need to show me that they're worthy of my trust. And then we had another response, just as the single most important and meaningful cultural component of the work environment without trust, nothing will operate at its highest level. Check out an old Colin Powell video that makes the point and then this person shares a link to that if you
want to see any of these comments. By the way, if you're a member of the Association Chat, a new era, it's called Association Chat, a new era study New Facebook group, you can go join that. We also have another conversation going on the Association Chat group on LinkedIn. And then obviously, if you're watching this, then you're seeing it on YouTube, or in the Facebook group, or you might be watching it on LinkedIn. So in which case, it won't be too hard to join those
groups that way. And then, of course, make sure that you join the newsletter, because I'll summarize all of this and put it in a handy little list of takeaways for the week. But back to what some people had offered up as some of their thoughts on this question. Absolutely everything. If there wasn't trust, neither my association or the role I play would survive. I learned the hard lesson, after 23 years at my former
Association, this person rights trust comes in many forms. And I think that can be where this question becomes more interesting. I think most of the professionals here agree that trust is an essential component to individual and organizational success. in the people business we are in, it means different things to everyone. First character, top of the list is Are you a person of good character who people trust, it is not about performance or results. This is the I leave my
dog with them for a week type of trust. Number two, and I love that number two performance, I leave my dog with them for a week, but wouldn't hand over a client. It's tricky, right? We all know these people, they help you anytime you needed it, you give them the shirt off your back. But are they always going to deliver the goods? Maybe not? I'm sure you know, the reverse as well. I'm not sure I like this person, I'm not sure if I trust them to watch my dog. But if I need something done,
they're the person I want to do it. And the third is responsibility, in my opinion, the most important form of trust for staff culture and organizational success. I had a boss who had a sign in his office that was just this, d w YSYD. Or SYWD may say that again, DW YSYWD. Other than being a palindrome, which I always like it stood for do what you say you will do. It's trusting your teammates that more often than not, if they say they will call someone they
will, if they commit to a report by Friday, they will do it. If they tell you they can't be somewhere when you need them. It's the trust that there is a sound reasoning behind it. Teams need this kind of trust the most in my opinion, I know if they say they're going to take care of my dog, I trust they will show up when they say they're going to follow the instructions I provide. And, and then he followed this up with it's everything. And I really think that that's true, right? It's so
true. We have a comment coming in here from Facebook user. Today, we live in rapid change knowledge levels fast and fast I got it. Governance is 20th, even 19th century, and institutions, including associations are not adapting to the new environment. Thus, trust is harder to gain. The manner in which Trust is earned is also changing. An organizational environment that fails and adapting to new times will not long survive. What a
great point. The thing about trust is that even if you've built it once, even if you've had it, even if you've established it, whether it was over a great dinner, and suddenly you really trust this person, or whether it's been over 15 years, we all know what happens when you lose, it doesn't matter if it was over 15 years, over 15 minutes. Once you
lose trust, it's really hard to regain it back. So the idea that we're always cultivating trust that we're always working at it that we're always thinking about how we can demonstrate trustworthiness to others is so key. And I'm pausing because I've been talking a lot and usually I would have a guest talking by this point. But it's also because I think that it's really a key point to think about that piece right there. We can't control everything around us.
What we can control is what we do, we can control most of the time, we can control what we do. And that element of doing what you say you will do is so key. I used to have a post post it note. I kept on the bottom of my computer that said My word is gold. My word is gold. And I took it off at one point because I became disgusted with myself because I found that I was constantly doing things. Even if it was something small it was like I I would say, Yeah, I'll give you a call before the end
of the week, and then I didn't do it. Now, okay, we all get busy and many of you are probably very busy yourselves. And you're also, if you're watching this, you probably know you're being probably nice people. And you're going to say, Yeah, but Kiki, I know, you can't be perfect. And that's true. But the fact that I took the post it note down, you should know that it was many times that I failed, in my
estimation, to uphold to my word is gold. My grandfather really believed in this neck, I know that this is something that we try to aim to do a good job at. But it's something that I've seen the benefits of when you have that consistency. And I've
also see what happens when you don't. And in starting this new job, with big red M. One thing that I've seen is there is this new team that I'm working with, and I'm regularly going in to try to like every time I'm reporting on what I'm doing for the week, I asked this question of the team over at Big Red and to see like, how does it impact the way that they're working
with associations. And so for those of you who don't aren't familiar with big red am, just really quickly, there's this consulting side, there's also the sales side sells, membership and sponsorships and exhibit sales and all kinds of things and works with associations that way consulting consulting side, you'll hear all about it supports with membership, recruitment strategies, and values, Proposition work, and that kind of stuff. So if you want to find out more, I
encourage you to go over there to Big Red m.com. Find out more. But anyway, so every Monday, I asked a question over there to find out more about how the team feels about the work that it does with associations. And this is what one of our AES that works over there said, Trust is huge and needed from both sides
in order to have a successful long standing partnership. And the situation of a new client, the best way to build trust, in my opinion, is to ask a lot of questions from the beginning, listen, be a sponge, give honest feedback, show them that you're working on their behalf and as an extension of their staff, we also need to trust that associations will be honest with us, for example, if they're having conversations with prospects, they should fill you in on those conversations and
pull you into them. building that trust with each other shows us as one team to the prospects and bears success at close closing a sale. The worst situation is when an association is talking to a prospect and doesn't tell you, and then you find out from the prospect when you try to pitch them and it makes you look like oh, you and the association are not on the same team. And it creates a divide in the relationship but also confuses the prospect, you and the association are on the
same team. And having that mutual trust gives off that impression to prospects. I see you Facebook user Facebook user says social media is also making trust more difficult. Ai makes us ask if it's real. And short trust is developed under new and evolving behaviors, our thinking must evolve. So true. And I think about this a lot as somebody who really tends to love technology and learn all of these new tricks, and things
that you can do with it and ways to use technology as a tool. He began saying, who's using it for nefarious purposes, who's using it, not for good, but for the more negative things that can be done with it. And it does make you ask more questions. It also makes you value your interpersonal relationships even more. That's why our meetings are probably becoming more important because when we meet in person I'm looking at you I'm not looking at some AI version of you an email that could have
been crafted by anyone. I'm not looking at some sort of SEO optimized version of you, I'm talking to you until you can make some sort of fest similarly that that attends in your place, I'm going to be talking to you in person. So these in person events become even more important if we know how to do our best at putting our best foot forward. And then take those relationships and cultivate them in a meaningful way. And that's the thing that I'm worried about is actually
once we have the trust, what do we do with it? And I'm thinking about this a lot because I'm now in the seat of focusing on one organization's marketing F hurts and how to not just spread awareness but also to like, build those relationships. I'm thinking of what happens when somebody signs up for the newsletter, what happens with the communication after that what happens when they show up to the CEO event, what happens when they show up to ASC annual and go to talk with somebody who
represents the organization. And it's these types of things that have me thinking even more in depth about how important it is every step of the way, not just that I'm interacting at a certain level, we're hoping that's going to be demonstrating trustworthy behavior. But then after that, like, how is the organization doing it? And how can we also build on that and educate others within our organizations, to not just trust each other, but to also cultivate that trust for our
members? And for our volunteer leaders? I started out working in associations, I always think from that perspective, first, and how would it be with building those relationships in an association and it's the same for communities, any community? How am I doing it for the Woman's Club of Winona, I could do better there, there are definitely ways that we can improve, usually looking at communication first, and then looking at other ways that we can work on our relationship
building skills, purposefully. But a lot of times, some of the simplest things that we can do is to begin with ourselves, and to look at how am I making sure that I show up the way that I'm supposed to? How am I showing that I'm accountable? And I'm trusting in others around me? How am I demonstrating trustworthiness to my team members? How am I demonstrating trustworthiness to the members or the volunteer leaders that I work with? And where am I most off brand? Where am I most where
am I not meeting the mark? So asking these types of questions can really help you because we can begin to chip away at some of the different types of trust busting behaviors, that we have the things that can destroy our trust, and begin to work at that purposefully, to try to build that not just for ourselves, but also for our organizations. And I'm talking about not just associations, but also the for profits in our industry, as a vendor. If you're an industry partner, if you're whatever you
want to call yourself, right? If you're a consultant, this issue is important for all of us. And I do think that how it impacts the role of trust and associations is a worthy conversation that we should continue to have and work on and develop along the way. So that we can find meaningful ways to do better. Think about how much better the value proposition for your association, if you're an association leader, think about how much stronger it would be if
the trust piece were stronger. Think about if you just focused on that part of it. How much stronger would your loyalty be? And your volunteer base? If the trust were stronger there? And what are some ways that you could look at cultivating that trust what is happening within the industry that we need to be aware of, and showing that there is that leadership and that guidance that feeds into the competency for the character, part of it competency and character of trust for the
character part of it. Just doing what you say you will do? Not spreading gossip, making sure that you're you are treating yourself with respect and treating others with respect. And I think in a lot of cases when we're looking at all of these stories of governance gone wrong, right lately, open AI the questions of what did they understand their fiduciary responsibility? And were people actually doing what they said
questions about about behavior and transparency. Transparency doesn't always equal trust, but this question about were things hidden on purpose, but was there a lack of checks and balances? Was it systemic Pick what was broken there. And this idea of figuring out how to write the ship, but also to make sure that your ship never gets to that point. If you're an association that is not an AR, or even the NRA, if you're an association that is not in that crisis, don't get there. Ask yourself,
Where is my association most on brand? Where are we strong? What is the trustworthiness that most of our Association members and volunteer leaders? How would we rank? How would we rank ourselves? There's a book that someone gave me recently to read tomorrow, called trusted leader eight pillars that drive results. And this is great. I've read a lot of books on trust. This is the latest one. And it talks about the eight pillars of trust and really, how you can evaluate yourself on these
pillars. And I'll just tell you the pillars really quickly. There are eight pillars clarity, compassion, character, competency, commitment, connection, contribution, and consistency. That's and consistency, not inconsistency, which would be a totally different story. Okay. So yeah, eight pillars, and this, again, is called trusted leader, eight
pillars that drive results, it's by David horse hugger. But I think, as I wrap up this idea of the role of trust and associations, I want to underline and highlight and bold and put an asterisk by it, I want to tell you that this is one of the most important pieces of the value proposition for associations is this trust piece, right? The fact that our education, associations offering education, or publications, or research, or any of the other work that good associations do,
most often all comes back to trust. The reason why the media reaches out to the association of fill in the blank whenever there's a new story is because it's the established trusted leader in that field, right? The source of truth. So we need to protect that, especially in a time and age where we have things like AI, which can, on the surface level, at least, seem to be a new source of truth for all things. But really, it
is at best surface level. And we need to be very careful and conscious in the way that we not only protect, but purposefully demonstrate and proactively cultivate trust for our associations. So that's my TED talk for today. I promise you, I will be back next week with a special guest next two weeks in a row, we have guests after guests, it's going to be
amazing. We're moving from topics about technology, talking about things like AI, and those types of things, which was a focus for the latter part of January and into February, and we're moving into leadership topics. So for all of March, you're going to be looking at leadership topics for Association Chat. But I hope that you will tune in, I hope that you'll continue to ask questions, and I hope you'll keep learning every day. And the reason why you ask why do I care
about curiosity so much? Because Joseph Campbell once said, A cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek. So keep seeking and keep looking in those caves and dare to ask the questions and have a great rest of the week, everyone