The A&G Replay Thursday Hour Two

So let's clean out the sound fridge.

Aw, we've got a bunch of great audio the crew got together that we didn't get to.

This is an example.

You could call it nutpicking, which is an expression I really don't like. It's where you pick out a particularly wacky member of the other ideology and feature them.

But this one, I just think number one.

There's so many of these, And the setup is you're not supposed to say, Wow, that's a person with real mental problems who needs help. You're supposed to say, oh, you're so brave. Clip number five Michael the.

First trans woman to have a successful uterus transplant oversent eggs included. And I want to be the first trans woman to have an abortion.

Oh my god.

I will let a doctor who has successfully transplanted a uterine complex before cut the organs out of a willing, healthy trans masculine donor place them in my body. I will devote myself, heart and soul to their aftercare. And I want to be the first trans woman to have an abortion.

You are full on metal, ill and evil.

Yeah yeah.

And any doctor who would perform that surgery knowing that those are his plans.

Yeah, I should lose their no, God, that is just sick. That's somebody who has terrible mental problems. And you're right, it is not picking to a certain extent, it's taking like an extreme example of the people you don't agree with in kind of act and then trying to pretend sometimes that it represents a large point of view, which

Well, and he's talking about a willing, trans masculine man. So is that a woman who's becoming a man who doesn't want her puss anymore?

Yeah? Correct, Oh yes, I don't.

Math like this. This isn't working in my head.

Yeah. Well, I got to admit at some point, and I'll bet I'm not the only one. As he was describing who he was going to do what with and that they were trans this and masculine, I was I was like, I need a chart. I'm losing track of, like who's who's going to bring the sperm to this party? Because I'm lost, for instance, who's.

Bringing the sperm and the bonus hols to this party?

Oh boy, again with that term. Oh oh, So. I saw a bud Light commercial I think was it was during the All Star Game, which, as we record, this was last night, and I didn't watch much of it because my beloved Giants have angered me and I'm just not a baseball fan anymore. I'm but the bud Light commercial and they never enunciated it, but it was like people screwing up.

A guy, you know, dropping the meat on the way to the grill.

I can't remember the specifics, and somebody spilling something, and then somebody breaking something, and then it went to bud Light. So easy to drink, so easy to enjoy, And it didn't occur to me until I was like, oh, oh, they're making light of the fact that they really fed up, and their commercial theme is look at everybody. Everybody f's up now and again, Yeah, dropping the ribs on the ground is not the same as making a decision. I'm sure there were a half dozen or more people involved

Take this too serious, leave it very briefly.

What the bud Light is a beautiful example of is that Anheuser Busch, or at least the people involved in the bud Light marketing became convinced, perhaps because they're personally down with it, but became convinced that that very tiny but outsized minority of Americans who pitches all this radical gender theory stuff represents most people. They got fooled. Yeah, and then reality which bat's last. Speaking of baseball, I said, not so much. We'll drink any other beer, literally, any

Oh?

Yeah.

A kid goes into Dunkin Donuts and he has four dollars with him and he wants some strawberry donuts and uh. He basically ends up wanting to get a few donuts and ends up with the whole box. Okay, so he explains how how he got him.

Because they didn't have the type of donut I wanted.

She gave me a deal. I could get cold strawberry donuts for the price of one, and I decided, can I get two for that deal?

So I could to pipe my month.

Of you.

I wanted some munchkins, but they didn't have that either.

She gave me the right.

You all of them.

There is a tool really pleased poor dollars. That is one very pleased woman with the number of cheap donuts you got. Wow, our sun drives a hard bargain too. What do you mean you're out of munchkins? Holy cal How are we gonna make this right? I'm asked people, the manager.

Please Karen in the making.

Yes, exactly, how are we gonna make this right? It's because I'm black, right, or a child or a woman or something.

E being racistly out of munchkins.

He's gonna end up running a hedge fund or something. Keep an eye on that. You send them trans didn't you, And that's why you wouldn't make more of these? Would you like me to go public line? Oh God, give him as many donuts as he wants to get him out of here, Michael, any introduction necessary to twelve Katie might be able to relate to this. This is when a guy gives you mixed signals. He is why he's giving you mixed signals.

He's even unsure about you the relationship or boy, if he's truly interested, he'll put in the effort consistently. So don't waste your time on a guy who's indecisive. Your job is not to convince someone, but to find someone who doesn't need convincing. If a guy stop talking to you, remember this quote. If your absence doesn't bother them, your presence never mattered to them. You don't belong with someone who doesn't want you. He's done you a favor by eliminating himself.

That's a good one.

Spitting truth.

No, my reaction is duck.

Yeah, well, that's one of the best things that Sex and the City ever came up with. That whole he's just not that into me thing as opposed to torturing yourself for both men and women, as opposed to torturing yourself. Well, why somebody is you know, didn't call you back or they always I've just been so busy, don't you know. Don't tie myself into knots because I've done this over it. They just they don't dig you that much, So move on.

Yeah, I'm not shocked to hear you say that, Katie.

We don't know you well, we've only worked together a fairly short time, but you do strike me as more tethered to reality as opposed to what you wish were reality than some folks.

Well, I mean I appreciate that, and I feel like if you're dating somebody and they aren't calling you back, and this is the fifth time that he says, oh I was busy, Hello, wake up. But I think it's pretty obvious he doesn't want to talk to you.

It's tough, though, if you really really want something to be true, though, to let go of that, I mean, that's easier said yeah, oh yeah, that's why you have to like rededicate yourself to clinging to reality over and over again in your life. If he isn't being bothered by your absence, he didn't care much about your presence. Yeah, that's pretty good that Yeah, no kidding, right, Gun doubled me over. Oh and let's end on a positive note, shall we, Michael, why don't you go ahead.

And roll thirteen?

Then I've got the details if we need him? Well, it means you want to do murder mystery.

Oh, I just always love.

I do a little bit of TikTok and when so, I think I'm gonna go ahead and get a second one. I'm gonna gift it on there and see if we can get you a little bit of love on there.

Oh.

Thanks, I want to thank everybody for the love and the kindness on the video. That red post is totally unexpected.

I'm in shock.

I don't even know what to say about it at the moment. I'm trying to wrap my head around it. Thank you again for all the kindness.

So here's the story.

This gent who is He looks to be I would say in his sixties, well into his sixties. He's a retired man, a veteran of the Armed Services, and he is living his lifelong dream of being an author. But he was sitting alone and ignored at a folding table at his local grocery store in Texas with his novel, hoping people might ask him about it or if he could sign a copy or something like that. That's I don't come across that. That often tables with novelists sitting there,

You know, it's so funny.

And you're right, Katie, I have this weird thing where if I'm like at a craft fair, Judy and I, you know, whatever the August days or whatever the what sits festival, and I'll walk through the craft fair and it hurts my heart, like everybody who's sitting there alone in their booth being ignored, some old lady who who paints glass and puts a little string on it that

Jack runs around screaming at grannies.

Anyway.

So uh this TikToker, uh shaw Jared Sweringen. He he walked into the store and he sees this guy and he wonders what's going on, and he figures out he's got a book to sell it on and he walks back out to his car and he says to himself, wait a minute, I keep thinking about this guy.

I'm gonna go back in and talk to him.

And so he talked to him, and he videoed him, and as he said in the caption, he said, you know what, let me put this on my TikTok.

Maybe we would get you some love.

The guy describing his book and everything Think rockets to the top of the best seller lists. The freaking power of the Internet. Is a book any good model? Or is it just a whole bunch of people feeling like you were describing where we feel bad for the old guy. He tried to write a novel. It's a dream, you know what.

It happened so quickly, I would imagine they probably went straight to Amazon and gave him a high rating. But his books did sell out that day as well. It was a dark and stormy night.

Lee Howard and the Ghosts of Simmons Pierce Manner. Sounds good. Are the hardy boys in it? Sounds like the hardy boys are in it? That would be a copyright infringement, Jack, But it's a ghost, an orphaned girl who uses the help of ghostly companions to solve the murder of her parents. All right, it's all telling stuff, man, all the execution obviously pelling stuff. Okay, that's ultimately a story about kindness and the kind spirit of a humanity. That's what it is.

No nursery stores a weird spot for a book signing, it is, That's what I'm saying, you're trying to reach the pickles, and this guy's sitting there with his books the table.

So I walked by the one table says can you give us some money for youth sports? And then I got him to the other table. It's a guy with a novel I don't.

And then on the way out, you're being sold chocolate bars.

Right exactly. Well, but inside the story even you're thinking, yeah, I got to get some some ground beef for the hamburgers tonight.

You gotta get buns and.

Ketchup, and probably ought to find a good summer beach rad too. An obscure novel, said nobody, but sounds good. I mean they solved the murder of her parents. Favor that, right, if it gone unsolved, it'd be disappointed. Well, right, yeah, I guess these sound. Fridge is now reasonably clean. Yeah, that mayonnaise was past it to date. I'm glad I

I will not eat another creature's testicules.

What about juggling them, I asked, Because I did that. I juggled pig testicles for charity. Oh really I did. They were quite slick.

M That is one of my favorite things you've ever said. You know, I didn't see that coming. I juggled pig testicles for charity. They were quite slick.

Yeah.

The feed loss in Western Kansas used to once or so they'd have what they called a ball fry because they had such a so many of them built up over a year of castration. Had a ball fry, and that's everybody would come out, and that's how you go through them all. Well, I suppose it is putting them to use as opposed to just throw them.

Yeah, wasting or juggling them like some sort of savage. It was entertaining. So now we played tug war with the intestines after.

It was a long day. Oh my lord. Yeah.

We called it the meat circus. It was a whole thing. Yeah, what was the charity?

I can't remember what it was.

It was something that was going against PETA, though I remember donating to like I think it was a butcher shop or something.

So we were a fundamentalist militia. The charity wasn't The charity wasn't neuticles for ball less hogs? Was it that? I don't know, weird circular logic thing there. Uh So this reminded me of a Saturday A Live bit from Saturday Night. The the idea because these rocky Mountain oysters, you can get him with your cheeseburger, where you've got fries or that or whatever, and they did you see the shrimp tower skit on Saturday Night Live James Broland.

I'll have to seek that out.

So we're about to play a clip at John Cougar mellencamp uh talking at a concert. Is this one of the concerts that he's doing with Willie Nelson and Bob Dylan or is he on his own here on his own hair? So he's touring with I know he's going to be I think at the Hollywood Bowl in LA which I'd like to see melonhead Willie Nelson and the ancient Bob Dylan. Of course, Bob Dylan's not ancient compared to Willie Nelson, who just turned ninety, right, it's got

Really.

It's pretty much the songs you expect, melonhead sings, pink houses, and you know that sort of stuff. I wonder why he's touring. A couple of years ago, he said he had no interest in being a jukebox. If people didn't particularly want to hear new music or new versions of old songs, that's fine.

He had no interest in being a juke.

He did get a tooth knocked out by his kid, like a year or so ago. Did that cause him any financial difficulties? He and his son got a fistfight.

I don't imagine he can afford basic dentistry. But I don't know. I have no idea of his financial wherewithal.

Why is will he doing it? That's just what he does. I don't think he can imagine any other life right, And like Keith Richards the Rolling Stones, why in the world would they play more shows, much less launch a giant tour. Well, I think Willie, that's what they do. Will he's paying off his tax debts, right. I don't know if he still has that, But that story was thirty years ago, Michael. But he also he travels with

It's just like he ready to be a smart like when I'm talking to Jesus.

And then it got real quiet.

What do you think, I mean an, hey, Joe, find this guy and then they see him after the show. Anyway, before I was a celubating, ruptured.

Guys. I can stopped this show right now.

I'm just doing.

Since you've been so wonderful. IM had to cut about ten songs.

Out of the show.

So that's a tape of did he actually leave? Wow? And he actually left? That's not cool. Don't let an a hole and the show. So you heard that the crowd was entirely on your side? Was one guy? So it's into a story. Some guy play some music, which is hurtful if you're telling a story that you think is either funny or important or something like that. Right, and but yeah, I think the rest of the crowd was at least willing to listen to your story, if not enthusiastic about it. Yeah, that was week.

No, it sounded like they were with him. They laughed at the joke and everything. It was just fine.

And some of them even went ah, hey at the guy who interrupted him.

A lot of people did.

Yeah.

So then he plays like six bars of Jack and leaves.

Wow.

Yeah, he's old and bitter.

I enough time for that.

I have thought about this a lot. I so on Charlie Rose, which I miss a lot, the TV show he had in the same week. I think John Mellencamp and John Prine. If you don't know Joan Prine, he was a very old singer songwriter who never had commercial success like John Mellencamp, but was hugely adored by people who like music anyway. He died COVID, but had him on both that week. So they're both super old and

And I just I don't know.

Could John Mellencamp have ever been John Prine in his old age? Maybe?

I don't know.

I don't know either. You're I think you're right about that. And at fifteen and twenty percent, you could either go fifteen percent more bitter and awful or fifteen percent more cheerful and optimistic, and that that makes a big difference in your life. I'm not saying it's insignificant. I'm just saying my body, his name is Dan, I was born annoyed. I'm never going to be Dan, right, And I love

Yeah.

I got a strength of character.

Yeah, all the good things about me are because I chose to be that way and I worked hard to be that right. I gotta admit when I when I was taking in the two different attitudes about growing over and your and your your best days being behind you. I related to the emotions of John Mellencamp a lot more than John Bryn. I'd like to be like John Bryan, but I feel in my head, in my heart more like John Mellencamp, whatever reason, because I think I'm born that way. I was, this is where I am. Yeah.

Is that what that is? Yeah, that's that's right exactly.

Yeah, yeah, No, it's there are like triggers that you have genetically, and if certain things happen to you or you run into them, that those switches might be flipped. But if you don't go through those things, they won't be If your environment is you have good nutrition or whatever, it'll never.

Manifest itself itself.

It's not like the entirety of who you are is determined by your genetics. Your experience in your life plays a role too in various ways. But you know, we're in the early days of really understanding that stuff. I just remember so they both sang songs that week and on Prime Song at that time. This is the last album before he died. I think it was When I Get to Heaven. And there's a line in there something about I'm gonna kiss that pretty girl on the tilted whirl,

Fathers get a day, but we get a month of alphabet soup. I like to the alternate people, what I don't think that's society is this.

I think that's the point of Pride Month. And that's so it's all due respect to my my gay friends who are uniformly with the meme I saw the other day.

LGB is all we need.

The rest is not us well, and it's not just a month, as you know, there are a whole bunch of other weeks and days around the same theme throughout the years, so it's not just a month a year, ye know.

But fathers get a day.

And the reason that popped into my mind is we have some kind of Father's Day related stuff and you know, maybe it would have been better then because fathers only get one day. Then you ought to shut up about the importance of fathers. Hey, you weren't here on Friday when Katie and I and Michael had the discussion that we've had for many years of looking for a Father's Day card and trying to find one that's not a

So I'm in coach pitch and you know, I'm so young, I don't really know what's going on at this point. Still, I'm still just playing baseball just to burn calaries and get out there and get some son right. And you know, I get out one day and I come back to the dug out crying, pissed. And you know, that's that's what a six year old does. He sits on the bench and he cries, and he doesn't want to go

That.

I like the Looney Tuthes reference that it is.

An amazing story.

That took a turn though she called CPS and they actually spent the night in jail.

Yeah, yeah, wow, did.

Not see that coming.

Wow.

Yeah, that is a good story.

Also, like the fact that he's six and he said the reason he was playing was to burn calories and to get some sun. I never thought about that when I was six, and I better work off this pop tart cool second shot with chip cookie was totally unnecessary. I'm gonna go play some baseball. Yeah, that's that's funny. It reminds me of a conversation we've had before that, you know, the and it's a cliche, and certainly the

Here is what it is. I'm not out of here.

I'm not out here to tell you everything's gonna be okay, because telling you go do it is telling you everything's gonna be okay. Telling you I You're fine, go run and play is that's a empowering message. To look at me a man to man, even as like a fifteen year old, and say focus, get this guy out.

That's it.

That's a compliment shift we've experienced. Yeah, i'd say, oh yeah, I can't. Plus you know, as I've said before, I was like you, damn right, I'm getting this guy out. You're not pulling me. And it's just it's that's what coaching is. That's what man to man coaching is. Now, it can cross the line into being an a hole if you're a bad coach.

But it was a very good coach.

I don't know. Anxiety.

It's going to cause anxiety. This is reminding me of a story my dad told me. He played football in high school and my grandfather. His dad was a surgeon, and my dad took a cleat to the shin during a game and my granddad sewed him up in the in the team team locker room and then said get your ass back out there.

And this was during this of war. Yeah, pretty much, I as well been.

Mid sixties.

On the other hand, Katie, do we need any setup for clip twelve?

Uh?

No, this is just where we're headed if this woke crap continues.

Hey, non binary offspring, Hey, non gender specific parent, just wanted to let you know that dinner is ready if you consent to it.

Of course I don't. I don't consent.

Well, I was thinking maybe in an hour or so, if you're up to it, me and your other non gender specific parent can sit in the living room and breathe for a little bit if it doesn't trigger you. Of course, you know, I'm not sure if I'm triggered by that or offended. I quite honestly, I don't know what to feel anymore. Trust me, I don't know either. Honey, Oh my god, did you just call me honey?

Oh my god?

I am so sorry. That's harassment. Please don't tweet about this. I already did. Well, it looks like my career is over. Well, maybe think twenty times before you talk. We'll have to live on the streets. Well, that doesn't matter to me because my feelings are more important than all of our physical well beings. Okay, well, I'm gonna go into the living room and cry I love you.

You don't have to say it back. I'm not going to wow.

Parent and child in the year twenty sixty.

That's pretty good. I don't know if I'm triggered or offended. I don't know what I'm feeling anymore.

I can't believe that dude's dad spent the night in jail. Yeah, all right, I gotta ask how hard did he kick him?

I don't know.

The boy looking back is he's full of love and he did the right thing and laughing about it, So yeah, he does. I don't know. That's crazy. Yeah, yeah, wow, that's quite a story.

You know.

They kicked each other pretty hard in those Limny Tunes cartoons.

Occasionally it was borderline brutality. Michael, you quit right, The Armstrong and Getty Show