Men's Month - Men's Physical Health

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Good evening, good evening. We are running a little bit late, but I'm glad you've stayed with us. It's talking Point on your Sabbath evening here and it's really good, really really good to have you with us. We're live in studio. We're not often live, or we're not always live, let's change that. But we are live today and we're here to talk men's health, both physical health and mental health in light of it being Men's Month. I am going to can I Pedro and over to Pedro. He's going

Are you there?

Alright?

Yay?

Everybody, welcome to Talking Point.

So today we were doing a series of different shows about men's health, and today we're gonna do the one on physical and mental.

Uh.

With us, we have two folks that what would you call all you have professionals? Would you like to get professionals?

Uh?

What is doctor Sopho. I'm not gonna say his last name because I will butcher it. His first name actually his first name, sorry, his last name is Sopho. And then we also have Mark, who's a regular on Talking Brain. Been a minute, but he's back and joining us again. So we're got to have them both as we talk about men's health and the pits and the falls and the pros and the cons and everything else that goes with men and.

So uh, real quick, actually do you wanna go into what we normally do, is an here or.

Are you just gonna yeah, well, we just I mean, it's Angie on She's she's alright, let's jump into it because we're pressed for as it is anyway, I know, Andie's on locations, so she's kind of trying to find a spot and trying to find a good signal so she could be aboard.

I think, I'm yeah, So we're gonna, we're gonna get started.

Aul.

Yeah, everyone, thank you Edul for joining us again.

All right, so doctor, could you just say your full name and then say who you are and just give us a brief like description of yourself.

Sure.

So my name is Dr Quartin Guardian, born and raised in Ghana.

Came here to stay young, and I'm currently a General Practitioner registrart so GP Registrar in training one more year and then main consultants giv.

Wow, okay, congratulations.

Did you do all your studying here or.

So partly? He partly back home. I was one of those moldy kids that.

Were sent back you see, when you were threatened as a young childs and you back home.

I was one of those who sent back you know, changed turn my life around so good, and then came back here in my studies in the university.

So I studied in London and.

It's a little which was a bad boy because you guys said, you know, but look at it like this and you know we got some back.

You will be where you are now. I would say that things time for a reason. All right, then we got Mark.

You're gonna just go bring you know, you know who you are. But just for those who may not heard of it the first time talking, I mean listen.

Yeah, my name is Mark Semple, the traumatologies therapist, psych psycho therapist, CBT therapiest you call it all the different therapies. I also volunteer with it something of conference, the COXSIT Service, Cornerstone I Conference. I also have my private practice, so I'm pleased to be here.

Thank you.

Of course I'm drawn by my host and Angela.

Hello, Hello again. Anything else, well, I'm just grateful to have these two gentlemen on board, looking forward to the conversation. Mark, welcome back. As said, it's been a minute, but you're already our resident consultant expert. And I'm throwing out to doctor Southher here that he could possibly potentially be also well I'm just I know, and I just lock him in, just lock him in, right, okay, you know, just like all right, that's my cue, that's my cute.

Like you should know by now.

I was easy.

It was.

I was easy to it. Like I said, first, we're.

Going to talk about men's physical health, and I guess right off the back, being a male like doctor southh just wanted to find that from you and in in terms of I guess give a brief just general synapsis of what men's physical health will be, because sometimes people may have it, may think of it as something else, or you know, have they may incorporate health mental health with physical health. So could you give us like a synapsis of what physical health would be would be considered.

So when we talk about men's.

Talking about as diseases which have a mental impact a man's physical and to do that as mental health, actually who.

Has a part to play in that? Because some degree of mental health can actually manifest.

Physically as well in individuals. So I think we should have definitely.

Just categorize of mental health as something that happens just in the mind, but sometimes in a certain individuals especially extreme cases, they may experience.

Physical vicinities as well.

But even to focus maybe on.

The physical related health issues associated with men, what we tend to realize is that men tend to present quite late at the stages of your disease.

And then the reason for there's you know, many things with men.

In generally we don't like to go to the down.

Type, and that's pretty much a known fact. And also in terms of men, we tend to downplay a lot of the issues that we face because we see as.

Even trivial or you know, we have other things to worry about.

So as a result of a combination of these things and others, men meant to present quite late.

In the stages of things such as because that's quite late, and then there are many other things. So these are common things that typically happened to correlated correlated.

Okay, I just want to ask, is everybody hearing doctor Saffo? Clearly?

I think I think there needs to be a little bit he's a little bit lower, so I think it's coming off on the radio a little.

Bit low, Okay. And also I don't know if it seems to be that you're cutting out. I don't know if it's signal where you are? Is it generally okay?

Where you are?

The signal is okay?

Firefi okay better.

That sounds better, okay, all right.

Yeah earlier it sounded sound yeah, but it's fine, okay, called working working through the process.

Yes, all right, doctor.

Can I jump in as question?

Yes, just you mentioned that that men don't have to go to the doctors a bit reluctant. Where does that and maybe we're gonna come a little later, but where does that stem from?

What is that?

What is that about?

And you in terms of the men that you beat, do they ever give you any particular reasons or you know why people didn't come sooner, or what's their reluctance or so.

Usually it boils down to a few things. One is they're usually too busy to make time for their health, and they feel that there are other greater responsibilities that they need to address or you know, focus your mind on. And sometimes when you have certain physical conditions which don't impact you or disable you physically, may I can deal with it, you know, I'll just take some pain relief or whatever it is. I'll just see how it goes Over the least couple of weeks, couple of months and

Older, or this is the part and parcel of perhaps.

They understanding of that particular condition maybe or that particular symptom maybe give them to what a doctor will see.

So for instance, if.

They are having fluctuating thou symptoms, they make it thing that, oh it's because I ate something wrong, or I didn't drink enough water and so forth. But as a doctor we may consider, oh is this a sign of cut cancer. So sometimes it's the lack of understanding of the path of physiolity behind the symptoms or so makes them a

Thet is like.

No, I do think this is worried and we go and check it and they reluctantly like the first common they always.

Say is oh, because my wife said I need to come and see and.

Goes for us.

We're like, you know what, You're very thankful that you know the you know, the females in their lives are you know, in quote unquote to them nugging.

But it ends up being quite useful because without that push, they're very reluctant to come by themselves.

I think ladies continue what you're doing to neever may see nagging.

But we appreciated very much side of nottice.

Oh well, as I said, this is just saying that every man is a great bat.

Behind every is a nagging going to go there?

Do we get results?

We said, we say, of lives.

How do you challenged that?

Obviously you know you are fakful for the women that maybe behind them all they come in.

You know, how as a doctor can you I suppose gen being courage because you don't want to seem like a bagging, but to sort of say, look, you know, how can you reiterate the importance because especially if you think that you know, you're saying they have extra responsibilities. They maybe providers, they've got families that put jobs. If they get sick, that knocks all.

Of that back into the background somewhere.

So you know, how can you kind of yeah, like you encourage them or do you think what would you say something to sort of say, look, you know, we get it, you're busy, You've got the time that think it's important.

However, I think every patient is different.

That's why in the world of general practices and family medicine is quite difficult, because one one medicine will be suitable for all men out there. And I think the few the few approaches that I tend to take is I try to find out is there any particularly important event in their life that they will like to be

So, for instance, if it is about as or prostrate cancer.

And letting them know that, you know, not routinely coming into a GP surgery, this increases your chance by x amount of percentage and as a result, you're less likely to reach that particular mouthhone that you want to reach is when you break it to them in that way. That's when they're like, oh, wow, this is actually quite severe or this is why this. So I think those

They hear that's it.

If you set them a target and achievable and attainable target, it makes it easier for them to do it because even tells them the whole you know, I just don't want to see you. They don't They can't quantify how many times you want to see the chip orders see and typically speaking every a a check club every six months or so is actually quite good when it comes to lend because we can give full for a routine

Yeah, so as.

A male, I know exactly what you're talking about. Doctor is I don't like going to the doctor? Actually, I do have a question. So do you find that people that work in the medical field are more unlikely to go to the doctor than say, somebody that is not a medical Ooh, you.

Could actually get both ways. I think the worry with so obviously you.

Get certain individuals who work in the medical field who are reluctant because they can of out I know this is, this shouldn't be anything, or they don't want to waste their doctor's time because sometimes they're aware of the impact of or the lack of resources within you know, the healthcare system, so they're like, I don't want to waste time, I will go on.

There's a bit more serious. So you have individuals such as that.

Then you have the individuals on the other side, which you know, you mainly say or they have contracts, or individuals who because they know the medicine doctors are usually quite worse for this as well. They know the medicine, they know that although a lot of symptoms can be benign, when we doctors see it, mind automatically goes to.

The thing that's will to cause us of the worst. So you tend to have these individuals who over present.

To the GP or over present to an emergency department because they're like, you know what, Yes, I know that there's a chance that this can be benign, but I'm also worried about all of these other things which I know can also happen.

So you can get to people on either side of the coin.

So in otherwise you get what you get. The ones that think they know what you know, Oh yeah, that that happens all the time. They come with the yeah, yeah, we have a lot of people who.

Come with especially in this now a day and age where it's very difficult.

To get a hold of your GP or your family physician.

People tend to come with a shop and a list of things that they want to talk about because that's the only opportunity that they will get probably a long time in.

CIG as a GP, and I know, like keV GP has like probably with ten thousand patients. It's very hard to see ten thousand patients, you know, in a week or in a month. How does how does the GP adjust so that they can get the men to come in more? I mean you gave you know with the wife and everything is yeah, like how do they get an outfit that you need to come in to be seen?

Like do we do we date? Do you guys text? Do you guys? Shall not? Notices like that?

Or so? I think every practice is different and sometimes you have to use.

Certain landmarkets.

So for instance, we're in this month of November and obviously we all know that it's Men's health month and it's as a GP practice or a a GI surgery. When you see these sorts of events or these sorts of dedicated months set in place for men, you.

Should use the opportunity to then.

Say, okay, you know what, we're doing a campaign trying to get as you said, you'll send out texts to the men on your on your.

System, put in certain banners or some sort of.

Adverts out just to try and draw more men because they're more susceptible to come in during this month because this is such a big campaign and orders on everybody's mind. So I think it's utilizing those sorts of opportunities. But otherwise it is quite difficult. As you said, we have a large number of patients that are on our list, so to send like for instance, MERGP surgery, we were a combination of three and it's like thirty thousand patients

You know, GPS usually work from Monday.

To Friday, but you also have the Saturday Sunday, maybe setting up a storm in your local area, having men come out and you may get their blood pressure shed, their blue coach checked.

These common things.

That are all respectors for disease having those things to check in the in the comfort of their own community.

You know, whether they a person going to the grocery.

We can easily just get a few of these things assessed and if there is an issue, give them the information to say that, hey, this is what we found today.

It would be a good idea for you to go and see.

U a GP.

A lot of men don't like to be forced to do things, So I think that's where the encouragement comes in and say that, hey, look, I'm not going to control you your life, but I believe that this results means, like X, Y and Z, you have this level of risk, I think it will be appropriate for you to go. And then at the end of the day, we're all humans. We have to people should be allowed to make bad decisions.

And utilize that.

But you will have done the best that you can as a family, friend, as a commission and so forth.

And I also want to just jump in, Can I just jump in here, Pedro and say that we can also do a lot of work within our workspaces, schools, organizations. I know, for instance, we've run meetings where we've invited certain certain businesses that cater for this, so they come in they do spot checks. And so if you're running an event as an organization, that's an interesting that's a very good thing that you can do to sort of

Even churches too, like we do like belfairs maybe twice a year. And you know, and and like she said, spot say, I think you need to contact your GD.

Yeah, I know.

Like my wife she makes me do blood pressure because every like once a month, just make sure my blood pressure is okay.

Yeah, my husband it was.

High out the night, so she was like, oh, I was like, look, if it's high in the morning after sleep, then I'll go to the GP.

But it was okay. So she was like and she did not.

I'm not lying my wife. Literally, I'm laying in bed. It's about seven in the morning. All of a sudden I feel a blood pushure cup put on my arm, and all of a sudden, it's what is going Are you really like you wake me up?

Just do it on my arm?

What do you do?

What it takes?

I said, we get results?

There you go, there you go.

I mean.

She's like you.

So it was okay, So I got this. I didn't got to go see the GP this time.

I'm not against our I'm not against our wives or our partners picking up the phone and making the appointments either. I mean I've done that. I've done that.

If if I keep holding back, going back on what you said too, because I was thinking what you said earlier at the very beginning you was talking about we we always instead of my health, we look at the other things that we have going on in our life, and I think it's man, we have to we have to kind of realize that if we're not healthy, we can't take care of the other things that we're worried

Bothered me so much. I can't function the way I need to function, and it's taken long at the hell.

So I think sometimes it's made me have to realize, if you just take them a couple of days, rest goes longer than trying to push through the pain, because then you end up hutting yourself further down the road, and then you end.

Up breaking down faster.

So I guess that would be my you know, that would be my kind of tipp it on why men should go and see the doctor.

When they should go see the doctor, then rest if they say.

Rest Mark, I see your microphones off or on? Rather, is this something that you want to jump in and say. And now we're talking physical health, but I'm sure you have a comment to two here.

I just think that.

You know, as much as the physical health situation, the mental side of things is.

It is so wide.

Men don't go to doctors because of society. Big boys don't let big boys don't cry m hm. So we start to grow young men in terms of that whatever you feel, don't cry about it, don't you don't stress about it. Also, we ourselves men as if we are always we're fixers, so we think that we will always fix whatever it is that's happening to us.

We'll fix it. Also, society doesn't relect be a man that is vulnerable. We talk about it a lot.

And you hear people say I would love to see my man cry, but how many times do you want to see him cry? Yeah, So all these societal things that happen you find that you end up and what the doctors. Also, it's compounded and then you find that like for example, my my wife books all my appointments. I'm too busy or it's not, it's it's not keeping me in once, it's not keeping me in bed.

I'm going to go to work.

Yes, So it has to be very a very serious situation for a man to crawl to go to the doctor.

Yeah.

So yeah, that's absolutely true, doctor Saper. So the other thing I was thinking of two is that's definitely his true.

Mart.

I think the physical the mental does combined in this whole thing, because it's even though we're talking about the physical, some of the physical things we're talking about as the mental part of why we don't physically do what we need to do, because it's mental involved. I guess question I have for your doctors out for next was about what like health screen is can we do at home? Like what can we do at home that will benefit us? Or like keepers going as men? But then also it's

Like the most is it? Like obesity? Is it blook? Is it diabetes? Is it stress?

Okay, so I think funny enough.

I even done a talk for the health team yesterday for our local church, and the title.

Of my talk was the little things matter, and I think that is the key answer to the question that you didn't propose, because a.

Lot of the time when we talk about help, we tend to think of the big, dramatic things.

You know, you know completely revolution as.

In you know what we eat, you know of throwing out all of the crapping in our cupboards and replaces with or just fruits and vegetables. We think of the extreme things, but sometimes it's the little things that also count. If you're at home, the few things that you can do to just give yourself a routine check to see how things are is number one.

Your blood pressure.

High blood pressure is a killer of many men, and it actually affects multiple organs in the body.

So if you think of the blood vessels in your body, like plumbing.

Work, there are certain organs within your body that require delicate or get small supply of pipes.

So the pipes that go to these areas are very tiny and as a result, they need quite.

Adequate supply of blood pressure, but as well as ensuring that their.

Blood pressure is not too high.

So even individual has high blood pressure, just like with pipework, if you have high blood pressure or high pressure going through if.

It's more likely to burst or leak.

It's the same thing with the blood vessel within our body, things such as your heart, your kidneys, your eyes, these are all structures that require small or good control of your blood pressure.

So I think blood pressure is something that is very much tea and.

One thing I would always advise as your wife has been doing control checking your blood pressure on a monthly basis, and if you do notice that your blood pressure is high, So normally you say that blood pressure is high when there's about one three five over eighty. So usually those sorts of values above that were usually worry So if you do see something like that, the key thing that a DP would always ask you to do is take your blood pressure for a week, take.

It in the morning and in the evening, and then what you need to do is you need to take.

An average of those blood pressure readings and see where your blood pressure sits.

If your blood pressure is on average above that one three fib.

For eighty, then go and see your GP may be a case where we need to have a conversation about what needs to.

Be done to change.

So that's bloo pressure. The other thing that I would always always encourage you to do is check their weight. Obviously your heights does not changed, or your weight will fluctuate throughout now weight or in other terms, obesity is a large marker of many chronic diseases.

So diabetes and joints or authritis.

Relate to pain and things such as your kidney, things such as heart attacks and as strokes. These are all things that are linked to the things that we take for granted. You know, sometimes when we wake up or when we are going through it, we might describe a biscuit here, a snack there, everything that, oh, yeah, it's not an issue. But all of these things compound all the time, and you know when you feel like, oh it's just one biscuit, it has an impact on you

So wait, blood pressure and sleep.

Sleep sleep sleep.

That's another thing that men aren't very good at doing.

You know, some people pick up night shifts, some people who work weekends, some people will only get four hours.

Maybe you have a child in your you know your sleep is.

Not that great.

These are all things that you compound over time. You may not see the effects now, But even a simple thing that's sleeping.

A good seven eight hours a day.

I know that it's very dramatic and a lot of us are like, whoa, we'll sleeping that that many hours is never going to happen. But you know that sleep is linked to your risk of getting dementia or even outsiders. But it's not an issue now. But you won't see the effects now, but in due time you will see that your memory will about to be impacted. You see that you become forgetful. So these are things that you can make changes now to ensure that you're in a better position in the future.

I think these are the small things.

Always asks patient to focus on the small things, because the small things you can continue to do that. There's no point starting something completely crazy, a completely new diet and it only lasts one week and go back to square away. But if it's a case of Okay, I used to eat I don't know, five customer creams a day,

Line anicity with their oublicity being of the way they always said that when you're that, it makes your borkins work harder. Yeah, So I guess my question would be so like five to ten thing that should be about.

I don't know exactly what I think.

It's will be like one ninety Now realistically I'm not I'm not jumping on this stuff, but like, realistically, what would in your kid, your pigon what would be a good weight that if I can't make one ninety, what would be realistically a good like a good way for somebody that that Because I know that you want you want to like yours, the GPS wants to be.

Within that that range. But is there a little is there a little leeway?

Is what I'm acting is there's just a little way way leeway because some people just like to feel a little bit bigger.

Than they than they are. Does that make sense what I'm acting?

Yeah, yeah, I mean the BMI is more completely accurate because some individuals have different depositions of protein in their body. Some people will have more protein than others, and obviously protein also adds to that weight. So I wouldn't say taking the bois is so viable is a key thing, but it's rather working towards that ideal weight and trying

Have an issue with is reducing that amount of fact.

If you're gaining protein as a result of these changes that you're making, your weight stays the same, that is fine because you're losing fact and replacing them.

With proteins, so that's not an issue.

And one thing that we always.

Advise individuals to do is one hundred and fifty minutes of exercise. That is the standard that every individual above the age of eleven should or about the age of fifteen, so it should be carrying out one hundred and fifty minutes of exercise. So that's two and a half hours of exercise throughout the week. And I'm not saying take out.

I do a complete two and a half hours work out at the General. But just a case of splitting it up.

It doesn't have to be in a crazy to be simply walking for thirty minutes. It can be cycling for thirty minutes.

It can be running, it can be you know, swimming.

There are so many activities that you can carry out.

But by doing one hundred and fifty minutes of exercise a week, you know that you add three to four years and more to your life just by doing that two and a half hours of exercise a week.

But people will think that this is trivial, this is oh, it doesn't mean anything.

This is just exercise. It shouldn't you know.

I can do it here and then my work gets me to walk more than enough.

But is these more subtle changes that will come down all the time.

Now my wife is listening and everything you just said, my get me. That's me.

I do not like the exercise, and I always think that I would say to I park about a block away from the job and walk to the job.

She's like, that's not exercise. So so now, thank you very much.

You just now I'm gonna have to have a discussion when I get off this point talking point to because I number wife could but like I told you, I told you.

Hear it anyway. But yeah, matter of fact, she's yeah, she just texted me and said that's what I've been saying. What's happened. It's actually even going to mark.

It's actually these sort of things that she helps your mental health as well, like exercises.

Right, that's gonna be my next question actually, So like if you don't get enough sleep, if you don't if you are if you don't get enough sleep, if you don't.

Think, wouldn't that kind of affect the way you.

You make you irritable, make you responded, make you depressed, make you That goes to the mental part. So that's it's all. That's why I'm saying the physical and the mental is all combined in one, and that's why it's both. It affects both. So like you were saying, like as you get older, you can get more of a chance of dementia, but you can forget be more forgetful. But it can also make you just more of a surly male or like somebody that just always nasty all the

Not taking care of yourself physically.

Yeah, I think that a lot of times we don't look at it all. Exercising and these things affect your mental health. One of the things I talk to my patients about is about how exercising, every time your muscles are basically contracting, your body actually secretes lopamine and serotoning into like mental health med isis into your bloodstream so

A problem is that we're living in a society that.

Like Weig speaks m hm mm hmm mm hmm.

And so that's one of the problems we have right now. But if someone.

Doing exercising, even when in terms of addiction, when I speak to addicts and I tell them in terms of how they can be able to keep their dopemin, uncertatoonin and endurving levels at a normal level, I direct them to exercising because once Europe coming off the as I say to them, the brain does not basically say, oh, you're giving me alcohol or or if you're smoking or whatever it is. The brain says, what you're giving me a synthetic either dopa really the sretoning and derphings or

Some triggers and so on and so forth.

Emphasising is the best thing to regulate your mental health.

Yeah, fantastic.

I just want to add to what or not add but just reiterate what doctor Sapo said about small steps, especially as we're approaching the New Year's and generally about that time, everybody is about their new year resolution and they're looking at those big, major life shifting changes that we make and then we keep for about two three days or you just keep renewing that new year. You know, oh my new year is February first, it's March first. It's you know, we shift it back, we shift it back.

Society and going up here, for not going up going up in the States and living here. Is there. It gives us the culture because there's two different cultures. So doctor, for the.

Physical part, what I find here is that the GPS are more medication lists absolutely have to. We're in the States. They just go straight to all you need, googles, the web. Take these pills, you need black blood pressure, take these pills. Whereas head the doctor will say, well, you said d the week and then we'll talk.

And then before they even give.

You pills, then they'll say, you know, exercise eat right, you know, let's put you on the diet.

Let's do this, let's I.

Can send that for a fact of going to the GB and they tried, they try everything possible before they go to medicine to try to make you to fix the palm that you may be having.

Do you find do you my other? I guess the thing would be like living in the UK. One thing I learned.

You guys love your coffee, and I know caffeine is one of the major things that can affect a man's physical health. And they love the alcohol intake. They love

Yeah, I mean she knows.

I think it all points down to you.

I was mentioning before because I never I don't.

Agree with the thought of going cold Turkey.

I think the smaller proportion of individuals that works for, but a large ruleship doesn't. Now we're the reason with cold Turkey is because obviously, let's say you've been smoking for ten sistors and you decide to go cold turkey today.

You have to fight.

Against the the nerve nervous or the nurse system pathways that have been formed over the last ten to fifteen years within that twenty four hours. And I promise you you are not going to beat your brain doing it. So, because the brain is a powerful When I say it's a powerful working, it's.

An extremely powerful working.

So what I always advise people when it comes to coffee smoking, whatever the addiction is, is a case of cutting it down.

Okay.

So if there's an x amount or let's say you smoke fifteen a day, okay, that's fine. Let's try and cut it down to maybe twelve with it. Then you set do as your new baseline, and then.

You cut it down to ten and then you keep the working way at it because the way.

It does is that you re set for you every time you drop it down and you stick to that, that becomes your new norm, and your brain is like Okay, we're still smoking, we're still getting the benefits, but I know that we're only smoking twelve and that becomes a new moment.

Then you set it down to ten and they'll both and so forth.

Well, as Mark said, we do it in the society where everybody wants that quick.

Fit or I need to get it sort of like straight away.

So we lack the patience to be able to take those small incremental steps which will be beneficial in the long run.

And it's the same thing with you know, making money.

A lot of people want to be million of years straight away, you know, but that process is a long process. It's not something that happens overnight unless you're gonna win the MTU, which let's be honest, is unlikely.

I'm trying to say, of course.

And I think you know, when you look at millionaires, a lot of them are you know, in their fifties, in their sixties.

It did not come overnight.

And it's the same thing.

We're tackling our addictions, tackling our habits then breaking certain habits as well. It takes time and you have to be in it for the long run. The same thing with investment, when you put you know that good one hundred pounds in the months, you're not hoping to make

And the same thing. We're losing weight a lot of them this I know with this is men's months, but I'm going to catch.

The ladies a bit as well. A lot of the ladies that we tend to speak to is like, you know, I want to lose you. I'm going to lose weight, and there is a lack of patience on that said, that's where a lot of people go and do you know a ze pic you know, these sort of instanting related pills they take this way.

To us tease and so forth.

Is the same thing as.

Human beings like the fast sticks.

But we have to remember that a lot of the time we're dealing with with habits that have informed multiple years in advance, and our nervous system has been rewired to go in a particular direction. It's not going to change that real hairing just because you said so today. So I think that's the key thing to remember when it comes you see either caffeine, alcohol, just trying to cut down bit by bit and see and sticking with that.

In a long word, preach it, bye, brother, preaci it. That's good. Yeah, who he is?

Right?

I mean definitely.

I had one quit when you was talking to hit me in the head stress because you was talking about right, so physically for male, even for a woman, how much can stress affect you too? Because I think stress, I think people sleep on the fact that I remember years ago I read a book and the first thing, the first line in the book says, stress is the number one killer. It's worse than high blood pressures, is worse than heart is worse than everything that you can think of.

So how does.

How do you tackle something like that with somebody that's like that's very overt stressful and then that that kind of goes.

Into the mental health but it's but it does affect physically though, too.

So that's what I mean, like you know, it does affecture physically when you just when you're just always thinking of stuff for stressing over something. So in your as a GP, I'm totally sure you deal people that do stress a good amount.

So like what do you what do you what does your take from that part health?

Though, yes, I mean it's interlinked with marks areas expertise because stress, I mean, from our point of view GPS, we tend to always refer when it comes to mental health data stuff to you know, our cd T team or our furviest team and so forth, because there are certain things that we won't be able to achieve in that tend to steam and it's time for that consultation. But when it comes to the physical aspect of its

As, oh, we're in a fight or flight situation?

Are we getting attacked? Is there like a danger nearby?

That's how your body perceives that stress or that particular emotion. It does not see that, oh, you know, you just got a parking ticket and you now need to try and figure out how to get the money for it. You know, it just sees as that we're in danger, and in doing so, it actually releases hormones called cortisol, corts's stress hormone. Now, what people don't understand about cortiso is that in the short period of time it's health in terms of making you allowing you to have make

Is being released. Now, what cortisol does is that.

It actually accelerates the amount of sugar production in your body, because your body's like, Okay, we're in a final flight situation, whether we're fighting, whether we're running away, we need sugar. We need nutrients in ability to get this body moving.

So that's one number two.

Cortosol will get your heart beaten more faster, and also get your pressure to increase, because again we're dealing with the fight or flight situation.

Your body's trying to repay you yourself in order to do or carry out certain actions.

So for instance, you're to see a lion, you that's not the ideal time for your heart to be taking it. You know, it's a wonderful sweet time. No, the heart means to between them to try and get blood around the body. So in that particular moment when cortosol released, your body can't distinguish between whether it's a lion or your work deadline.

You will treat it as the same.

So again, your heart rate goes up, your blood pressure goes up. Not obviously over time that increases your risk of high blood pressure. And this is just as a result of you worried about something. And that's what I was saying before in the beginning, that there is a when people think of mental health the thing that always just in the mind, but the brain is so powerful that they can actually manifest itself physically, and you start to have issues physically as a result from the stress

Yeah, yeah, yeah, spot on the ducks. But as I'm not even going to repeat to what the doctors said, spot or I would have said the same thing. However, what happens is that most of us grew up in a stressful environment, and that is when you have top ex trauma that pops in because the body gets so cussed up to living in ice stress that the brain does not switch off. So what happens is that we our brain basically rating in a high high stress even hence why a lot of us broke.

Yeah your mark.

People, yes, sorry, but that yes, that's why some of us procrastinate because of the fact that we get so positive to the high stress that we're living in.

The more through the.

The more close the appointment or whatever it is happening, school exams or whatever it is. If we think that we perform at our best when we are stressed out, you know.

And so these are things, and so what happens the brain says, because.

Of the fact that you're always in a fight flight mode, then I have to basically keep the partisan and adrenaline pumpy.

And so for example, sleeping.

Most of us go to bed, and the brain says, because safety is not the environment, safety is in your brain. So you can lie on in a safe house and still feel worried that somebody's gonna come in, you know.

So then what happens in terms of people.

Not sleeping is that the brain says, okay, one of us have to stay awake in case we got to go to fight our flight situation.

So while we are awake, the brain sleeps. So in the morning.

Hence why a lot of us make a lot of mistakes when we are so stressful that we are at work because at that time we're awake and the brain.

Is sleeping, you know.

So basically that's happening to us. And so the body basically continue to pump the cortisol. The problem as the doctor talk about cortisol and basic bleach to sugar, if it in the court that cortzol but you is basically an energy. Cortisole mixed with adrenaline gives you that energy boos okay. So it's so the body keeps popping it out, the brain keeps popping it out, and the bodies like, we have enough, what are we gonna do with all

Yeah, well, I'm really glad we have to had the discussion, especially on the physical health and along with the mental. We're gonna put a pen in it. We're gonna go to our song singing.

Yeah we surecast.

Yeah, yeah, let's go to he has.

Before we do that.

Doctor South, I know you're not able to stay with much smaller, but I was, like I was saying to early in the beginning of the before we got on the radio, you are on different you know, media platforms and stuff. I don't know if you want to share so that people can see because, as I said, your reals are really insightfied. I've not watched all of the watch all a lot of them, but I did watch one or two, and I just want, you know, to

Yeah, so yeah, sorry that I can't stay for long.

Rai's been a pleasure to be on this platform, and actually we're really insight for having this conversation.

I'd love to join again in the near future. But in terms of my platform, so I tend to do short.

Rules or short videos to educate and provide individuals knowledge about conditioners that are coming to them.

And I just weren't saying sure that people are.

Empowered and able to make informed decisions about their own health. So you can find me on Instagram, on TikTok, Facebook at the at sign doctor d R and then SOO s A r FO.

So that's at d R s A r f O.

And I'd love to hear from you guys on those platforms. Thank you once again for having me and I'll be back very shortly.

Thank you so much to join us.

We really appreciate your insight on the physical health of men. Definitely, we definitely will be calling you back.

I look forward, take can all right, all right, so we'll go to a song now, Marvin. Stop.

He has his hands on you.

Okay, listen, he sees she sees a tea.

You cry, and he said he sha shut inside them soon in time. You want what he loves.

She's to.

Go through.

What do you go through?

Listen? Ches No, he said, that's a good place to slip up those hands and give him some place.

Oh, I can't get no help for me.

That's a good place to lessen. Listen, Let's look at the workers.

See your old day.

Shock even when the soul is armed.

Yes, and from the top of your shore shout shout.

Oh well nonever well there ever here is changed. She won't share, But shall I do? Can I tell you one thing? Remember hes no.

Airs here his hand.

He has, Yes, it does, he said, I see you through, and when you cry, gets holding you.

So just live he chi not.

So he will he will fall bad, Yes he will, yes, he will.

Just know.

He as he said, old Sometimes you feel so lone like a child long spill. No, thank you Jill leading you to this stroke. What you say when win?

End? When will lie? When? When I win? That's why I want to know.

But Chase.

No, he has his hand, he has a say it's all Yes he does, Yes, he does.

He says, if you.

And when you fight, he's holding you.

So you can chess.

Just see him first hand time here will you? He will lie? No cheers. No, he has his head end when times.

And see son cannot understand, but simp size if we were said to focus what it needs to be.

He is hand. See he has a sid on you and when you cry, he's alway. So just seim you your head. You to mother?

You know.

I am home from her? Yes, said why you will us know? Just a hesitant. And when you came he said city, he'll be gonnaway.

Why don't anybody.

Else socialsity, no names about femly.

Chersten. No he has his head yeah, just no, he has his head, just his Oh.

Shoot you.

Welcome back to talking from everybody. Thank you for joining us. As we were talking about.

Medical health and in the physical ended up aspect of a mentor and doctor.

Southold had to leave us.

So we're now continue to be joined by Mark Simple, who has come on the program as we said before many of times, and he's a residential poking the point co host.

He's pretty much like a cost of arts. We need to get him a T shirt.

Actually, yeah, get yeah, yeah, yeah, we need get him a T shirt because it's definitely he's definitely a part of the potagon anytime we need him become so definitely. Uh So, as we were talking more just talking about the physical government and everything, so now you you deal more in some of the the physics also there mostly in the mental of men. So what what would be what in your opinion, what would be the biggest mental

Okay, at at present, one of.

The biggest issues with facing men now in new divergence. And when I see new divergence, you have the autism aspurgis ADHD and it's now being a lot more pronounced. I think the biggest issue in all of this is that in terms of what we spoke about in the beginning, men are are free to present and actually try to understand what's happening to them. The biggest issue is not the illnesses. I think the biggest issue for men is being able to present and get diagnosed or checked out.

But when it comes.

Tomental that these things should always stay intact.

Mm hmm.

Yeah.

Do you find that men?

Do you find that men with mental health like, like we just said, is it just because like if they go get say like that's why they don't like to see the dact way, they don't want people get psychiatrist or of us you know, the top their problems out. Is it so what you're saying is that like a black man doesn't want to get to the bottom, like get to the bottom of why they're feeling that way.

Because do you, okay, let me put it this way.

Do you think that some black men or even men in general, know what part of the problem is, but they don't want to address it and that's why they don't get the help that they need. So, like, let's say I'm just looking a example. So let's say like I just lost my brother and I mentioned this last week, and I said, I need I know, I need to get I know I need to get some grief counseling because I have not thought any grief throughout this process,

And just keep working.

The question is why are you pushing it up?

Right?

And that's that's what I'm afraid of. That's what I'm afraid of because and.

Because of the fact that they are several narrows tives that are attached to the why for example, by may be pushing it off because one, as you say, it will bring up other issues too.

Even though we talk about mental health culturally.

Everybody's you know, there are different words that people use that really shouldly. It's like I don't want to mainly moot most of the Africa and our guys said, I don't want people to think that I am mad, and so those words get it's still it's still root.

They are still rooted in our culture.

We don't want anybody to know that we having therapy or whatever, because each songs as if we're less of a man if we actually do these things.

I need to get you off.

And I just said when you just said the first thing you just said, I think that's part of the crunch right there. So you said that we don't want people to live we mad. I think the problem is that men over the years have instead of being able to express themselves, when they have expressed themselves, they have come off as mad and they've got it so ostracized or so they've been so like, how could you be like they don't. The person doesn't understand that they're going

What I'm saying something? Because I'm like, am I saying it right? It gets help a lot of us as men who reach out for help. We do, but it's only once. Most men only reach out for help once. In this era where GPS.

Are, you know, you gotta keep calling about some forty to fifty times before you can get any.

We want, we reach out.

That if we are not being wored, we met shut down, we go into hiding.

Because of the fact that.

As men, we still we were brought up in homes where mommy did a lot of.

Things for us. So, man, we need to get it straight. That is why God gives us a woman.

And as you talk about our wives basically calling the GPS and so of, because of the fact that we're going to do it. If it doesn't work, we shut it down. We're not gonna you know, it's going to take a long time before we cry out for help again. And so hence why you find that we need agreement along with us two. Basically, if we cannot do it, they will basically pick it up and do our blood pressures as.

To be hard before and so on.

So for because of the fact that we're going to reach out and if we don't get the result we want, we shut down.

So that's one of the problems we have. Yeah, go ahead, Petro.

Well, so I've been there for nineteen years and I had two boys before then. And do you think having both parents in the house can help the mental health of the boy or the child? Or we're talking about men,

Are married in two person household.

So yes, the research has shown that there they are benefit benefit of man being in a hole.

You have to understand two parents being in a hope is not the because you can have two parents in a home and a home it's a fairly dysfunctional. It's still on one parent. That's only one parents parenting. Yes, I got you right. Definitely neithern what children need. Put this for a young man, you know, or.

To bolt tomate home and go in his own home with a wife and treat his wife wonderful, then you know mommy has done her job, because mommy is the one that teaches a young man how.

To actually give and receive love from it from a woman.

When a young woman leaves her home and basically and she has a wonderful relationship, then daddy has done his job because of the fact that collectively mommy and daddy working together make that chall around bach individual. Because of the fact that the things that mommy while mommy love and Mommy here is more emotional and so on and so forth. That is more disciplinary, disciplinarian, and so children need those boundariest. So when mommy and daddy is around, you get more of a wrong with child.

When it's just mommy.

It is.

There are a lot of as we can see that.

There's so many stats all day that talks about single parental especially with mommy. The whole situation is the research has shown that children growing up with fathers to a whole lot better.

Than with children growing up with mothers. Is that particularly for boys or for both.

I'm sure there may be something.

I go with my mother who I was fourteen then she met my father, and it definitely I think I definitely not would have.

Went differently if my mother never married my father. So I can kind of see where you go with that.

I guess I can see my life and then I would have been a different mindset if I didn't have my father for fourteen going up till he passed away, because he just told me different things. But like for a single parent that doesn't never never get remarried or get married, That's where I guess co parenting or having more models, or having like a mentor to help, or even reaching out and getting assistance with the different programs

They kind of address it.

Look move men, ill each you started from childhood, Yeah, and it starts from the home environment.

What's happening between also even.

Start from us. We call it in you through trauble from in the worm. And I can even push it.

Back further if here and here here is one of the research that game. Do you know that if your father is a cheater, that.

Cheating on your mom, then basically that gene what is sarming with that child is basicly and that child has the potential to cheat.

And because of the fact.

So what happens when that child is born the home environment facilitated the process of that child cheating.

Wow, wow, I think we might have spots on debate there. I'm sure our listeners are are mulling that one of And you've got your hand out if.

You had a question, and I'd just about to tell the question.

Yeah, I was kind of going to go back, and maybe it's following on a little bit for what you're saying, because you were mentioning it's quite interested to.

Hear that there seems to be and I don't know why this.

Maybe just increased awareness of neurodiversion conditions, but I'm just wondering, and obviously because many people, and I guess it's the same for men and women get can get diagnosed quite late because I don't necessarily think they don't ass you know,

Those kind of things. But as as you get older and an adults, they may present themselves in different ways.

So I'm just wondering what things they could be. So if somebody is thinking maybe something.

Seems a bit awful, not quite right, what could they be looking out for that actually could signal possibly.

Can like that?

Right?

Well, in terms of all these things are new researchers that are coming out in terms of new divergence. Someone you in the olden times, we will say that if pay for example, adhd, adhd is hereditary, you know, under said. But then now they're realizing that adhd is not hereditary. Ad it's not it can be hereditary and it cannot be hereditary.

All right, And so you ask yourself the question why what what? What's this?

What's the difference? Because of the fact that as what I just say, adhd can come down with it, because of the fact that one of your parents that or whatever it is, has basically and so have adhd. And so it comes down in the g because we have to there are a lot of work now that is done on gene and what comes through the gene of of a child.

You see what I'm saying.

So then so ADHD comes down from your father, lies, it comes down from your your dad's life. Now Dad is gonna be basically marry mom. The relationship that they have is going to facilitate the process because of the fact that ADHD is basically we're main So the brain basically is in its protection. It cannot stay still right. The brain is constantly pumping up, you know, all the different adrenaline and.

So on and so forth.

So rom environment it's going to facilitate that process. It's just like like they say, we.

Find the alcohol gene, yes, so why does this child basically even though you find the alcohology, why does the children of alcoholic becomes alcoholic on it? Because of the fact that the Whoman environment provides that if the child has choices, if the child has you know, all the different things, then children are not going to boom to that. But what they have is that they need daddy and

That's basically what it is.

Okay, So most of us, for example, when it comes to children again, what we do understand the neuroplasticity and all these different things that happens with children.

We think children are Oh, don't worry about them. And we hear people we say this, don't worry about them. They they're not gonna understand this.

They may not understand what they are making, meaning hm hm.

Yes, yeah, I think we need to give kid more credit.

So for example, listen to this baby in the boom.

It's already saying whether outside of this boom it's faith or whether.

It is not.

The baby also knows songs of voices who are safe and who are not.

Now, I have a child in the boom.

That hasn't started, and they haven't been a tree or whatever. It is already making meaning means that the moment that child comes out of the book, the child is already saying, well, look, I am in an unsafe or I'm in a safe environment. Hence why some of us got clay babies, and hence why some of us have babies that can explore and mom and daddy, because you know, praise every because of the fact that we're already setting this child of the either be successful for the either not.

I like that, and it puts the honest on our parents.

It puts the honest on our parenting to be vigilant, to to to do the work so that we're providing safe spaces, we're providing opportunity for for our children to get the support they need. And I know this is this is this is not easy because, as we've already discussed, the NHS is overwhelmed. It may take persistence, it must be may take just being maybe loud, vocal, present, whatever it means to make sure that you're getting the help that you need. And I'm talking to parents and I'm

Our family or wives.

Just raise our hands and say, you know what, I think I'm struggling here, or I think something is wrong and we need to we need to look into it.

That's actually read my next point, Mark, what do you what do you say to Like we talked about the physical way they said, like we were talking about how the woman nags.

The husband to go get you know, get see the doctor.

The kind it kind of applies even in the mental health of a male too, would you say, I mean, I know it may be a little bit different in the sense of a lot of times they make the male may get more irritated or more like leave me alone.

I'm fine.

But and what what what could a woman, us a wife do that can help a male that may not want to admit that he may need some some some help or that his mental like, you know, not recognize that he's struggling mentally.

I think that because us men, we just show that women, when women talk, they lower their stress levels, when men.

Talk increase stress levels.

Right, So aband the quiet plate actually online?

Okay?

Is quiet?

However, what our wives can do if the male has a trusted friend that it can let.

I think it's more us raising the topic.

Mark, You've gone a little quiet, so I'm just gonna ask you to speak.

We need to raise these topics with because of the fact that nobody will actually start talking about this as men were suffering, young men are suffering, us, as older men are suffering. And because of the fact that we don't have a forum where we can raise the topics either.

At home in the church.

Uh.

Because of the fact that a lot of times, and again.

That the whole premise of you know, I told him so, it's it's like even this program here, I know a lot of wives are going to basically be on men their husband as if I told you so, you should have done this, you should have done that, you know, bring it back, uh and talk half that the topic opening of talk about it.

What asked him?

What are are different ways he can basically work with to actually either go to the doctor to actually ea rest an issue. And because of the fact that we're not gonna basically just jump up and go pop the therapy.

I'm not gonna do that.

Sure, So it's about having that conversation that is in a safe.

Environment for both men.

Because if a man feels if you are treating him like a child, even though he wants that, at.

Times, he's gonna shut down. Mhmm.

Yeah.

So it's about opening it up, having that conversation and yeah, and do.

You have a question.

What are you talking? I can't Hey, okay, all right, And I'm sorted a little bit of that's love that I mean to do that. Yeah, I really, yeah, I agree with you totally with that. I think my wife and I we I can get a little into the still of my wife when she when she comes to me with stuff like that. I'm trying to get better at it, not saying I get like mad.

I'm just like, you know, just leave me a lot.

I'm fine, But like you said, she just keeps like plotting me insane to me, you know, like listen, I'm just worried about you.

I just want to you know, just want to bring it to your attention.

And then she wouldn't even say like think about it, like because she does give me the time to sit and you know, by myself, and she'll say, well she gonna sit off and think about it and come back and then we get talk like so I think that does just to help with the as a male, help with.

The mental health of what you're going through.

Sometimes you just need to be able to take a minute and think, to try to get all the because I think sometimes its nails. We have so much things going on in ahead at once that we we get we get confused and all the all everything, and then we don't fix the issue that we need to fix, and then then the mental part that you know comes up.

Because the thing about it is this that as men, one of the things that we don't talk about is getting overwhelmed. Yeah, there's so much locally, there is so much.

We have to think about, you know, and because of the fact that we don't talk about it, everybody assume that, oh the word about it, he's fine, and not realize it that easily happened where this one can be overwhelmed and you just don't know about it.

And and that's where the conversation.

I think maybe because my wife's bless her, she's a wonderful woman. People's are therapies that we operate, uh, you know, way she knows. I don't like when I go to the top four EXCEP. When I go to the doctor, by doctor say should I put nine nine nine on speed dial? Because you actually hear in front of me.

I don't turn out, you know, I would put you know, so they always you see I turned up. What she does for is that she's like, Mark, look my book misappointment for you. You're going you know. So it comes down to our wives in pufty. You need to know each other. You need to understand each other.

The fighting and Lisa tried to know each other. Try to understand talk about these things, and so you know your partner and you know what are the strengths and what are their businesses. My businesses is booking appointment. My wife knows that and so she books the appointments for me. But if we did have those conversations, she would have been on the wisel.

That makes sense.

Can I just.

Ladies have a question? Well, you're both standing there looking like you have something to say.

Well, it's basically to share some stats and get your thoughts on it. Mark and the rest of the team. Because I was in preparation for this program looking at them, and I've got them right today. I've spilled stats out before and got them completely wrong. But it's dismal and the picture is looking quite bleak, and I want to know Mark, if this is what you're seeing in your own practice, and then oh, we can look at addressing it.

Percent more likely.

Than all black and white counterparts to be diagnosed with mental illness. And a lot of these stats relate to men who are under fifty, so these are young men by all accounts, Mark, are you seeing this in your practice? I mean, do these figures sound skewed? The sound about right?

And what do we do?

What do we do? I would say they are about right at five percent.

I think it is underreported, especially within the black community.

It's underreported when it comes to as I said before in the other programs. I wrote in paper or.

The effects of PTSD and complex PTSD within the Black and Ethnic Minority community, and they said black men are twenty times more likely to commit suicide than the white pump part or because of the fact that the black what I really realized, because of the fact that the black community is hush hush m hm. Those things are not reported, those suicide attempts are not reported, are not even to our family.

Wow.

Because of the fact that we're faithful. Again, the stigmatism that is running within the black and ethnic minority community. The research show also black a young man is seventeen, as you said, in terms of diagnosed with mental health. And because of the fact that the first thing, and I've worked in a lot when I was working with NHS in a lot of mental health units and.

So on and so forth, the first thing that they think.

When a black child homon talk about mental health is that one.

They're lying.

Wow.

So there is a barrier in terms of in terms of treatment.

Okay, So if you think that this young man is lying whatever he says, basically.

You're not listening. Two is that you know he wants to get off of with work easy or whatever.

So there's a lot of around A young think about him, a young black boy six two, six feet three coming and saying that he's having anxiety.

And he's not six feet two, six ft three all. He's also six feet two, six feet three.

Wide, so he's you know, he's passive, and I work with him, and you look at this guy, you have to actually say, sit.

Down and listen to them.

Because the whole sitting step needs.

To be change is that the church has in part of playing it. And I think the problem again is that we is a church a partab with these things.

Also yeah, uh see see in terms of our laity and so on and so forth.

A young black boy picked up a joint smoke. He has been suffering with that illness for over eight years.

Yeah, Angie, want go ahead?

No, no, no, I was gonna say, Angie had a question regarding the church as well, which might come in quite nicely here as well.

That's yeah, yeah, I was gonna say, it's interesting that you do mention that, because I'm also wondering, you know, what our church, our church could do more of, because really, when we think about it, especially from coming from a Christian perspective, there are lots of kind of probably biblical principles about us looking after our body doing things, but kind of tapping into it's something that's doctor South has said at the beginning where sometimes men don't necessarily think

So that kind of underlying principle.

I wonder how much as a church we really do promote that talk about that. But in a way that's kind of understanding. As you're talking about the need to listen to understand where people's situations are. I don't think it's quite as clear cut as you know, this is what you're supposed to do, because there are so many

You know, how can we kind of.

Encourage those principles but in a kind of caring, listening way that it just doesn't gloss over the surface.

It really gets to d you know. And Jesus, he you know, he kindlights the importance of rest.

When he was under stress and pressure, he went to find a quiet place, you know, away from the hustle and bustle.

Of everything and away from his his responsibilities that his under might be. Yeah, Yeah, I'm just wondering how how can we as a church do that better?

Most of the churches that have been to.

Observe most of other churches basically what I call it into what we call religiosity, okay, and that is if you look at most churches, no, we have at least a deer is a campaign happening early spring, and there is a campaign normally happens sometimes it sent them October side right, spiritual. Where is the campaign for mental health? Where is the campaign for see what I'm saying so basically we have stopped saying pray, brother, pray and praise

M hm, doesn't sound.

So things like bay one of another's borders is not gonna basically be be sorted in church because church is not a safe place for anybody.

We bear the burtons up to a point.

Because of the fact that I may not be able to yeah, I may not be able to deal with.

Your body, you know what.

For example, what happens when someone gets up and say I was doing this or whatever it is, The.

First thing we do as a church is jumped to shut them up.

We take them out the back and somebody talk with them, and then we let them go free. We don't basicly say well you know what, we you know, we have this I'm gonna contact this person for you or whatever it is we you know, so the truth and again if we actually wrap it up in it's houltrue. Well, the look at the churches and all the churches that we have within the Culting Conference or or whatever it is, it's predominantly either Afro Caribbean or Afro you know, or Africa, yes,

Yeah, Angie, can I can I ask you to come in here because I know you're Your church in particularly has a very robust is it a mental health team or and maybe some some tips or or best practices can be shared with with our listeners. Sorry, Petro, I mean.

You there where.

Do you have a mental health and well being team? And there's a team made up.

Of practitioners and really it's about kind of highlighting the importance and recognizing and being aware of your mental health.

So they've done a range of things from there's always.

A message in out bull liveting highlighting something I think, you know, whether it's just encouraging you you know that you're not so I think today's one was if you feel like you're struggling, you know that you're not alone, you're special, you're value, et cetera.

So there's always something in the bulleteer they've.

Run, They do PM spots within Saddle School, and then they work with They've worked with different departments, the youth, the seniors, running workshops or having space, you know, taking space to actually have those conversations, and.

Offering their support from a group level right down.

To individuals as well. I mean recently our church has gone through a real period of loss grief, and you know, they've been on hand to kind of support people, and whether that's just kind of giving you a hug or just you know, praying with you, just being there for people to talk to, but against really highlighting the need for you know, for you to be doing something about it.

You know, it's important and I think as well, it's really important.

To highlight that it's not just when you're having a crisis, because often people will reach out when things are going completely wrong. It really should be our lifestyle choice should be things that we're doing naturally, which is why I kind of think, you know, the whole idea when we think about the biblical principles, it's right there.

But how we should be living our lives, you know.

The Bible is full of those promises, full of those key tips and everything else.

And sometimes I wonder whether we for kind of forget that, and I cirvile of that.

It's very easy to think I know what I should be doing, but sometimes you need the encouragement.

From wherever it's coming from really from a you know, where its from a biblical.

Perspective, or you've got these practitioners who are sharing with you practical tips on how to do this, you know, because as you said, whilst I recognize prayer, it is all important if I'm struggling with.

Something that may not actually be what I need.

It may to be someone to kind of hold my hands and say, you know what, you've got this, and if you need some help, come and talk.

To me, you know, And I know for me that's been very helpful, especially of the last couple of weeks.

So having those kind of initiatives, and again there's lots of things they can't do everything, and they're starting as small as it were, but I think it's a really great start to kind of just really hard and it's been quite amazing to see the impact and how people have been able to share, open up and just kind of it can be very scared to be that vulnerable as well, but actually being open to talk about it, and I'm fit doing some dedicated work with our men

Some manychap saying, you know, giving you a heart rcre telling you I love you or I appreciate you, that kind of thing.

You know, they're coming from a trauma place and that informs their behavior.

But trying to kind of change that stigma, change that story, change that.

Narrative, what there can be is all important. And you know, initiatives that ones, we have them from.

The starting end, but we've got at Balam is a great way to start.

So I definitely really encourage the churches to kind of, you know, seek at those people because you've probably got those I said, practitioners with your age within your churches and communities that you can call upon to do that. But so yeah, so I guess you know, it's it's a good it would be a good way to start. Yeah, you know, sometimes we question about whether.

Xenerine I always have a conversation. Do men really have these conversations?

Did they talk? Did they open up to each other? And I think they probably do in smaller pockets. But there's more to be done, and I think as a church and as Christians, we should be able to change that narrative that the society has been peddling for many years, you know, telling you a situation.

I was in America, New York a few weeks ago and a friend of ours, a friend of or.

As basically I know this individual citizens and box, if you want to put it that way.

We grew up in the you know, in church, we hang out and everything like that. I'm for and myself and my brother, my brother came.

I was doing a presentation in New York and my brother came to support me, and this friend came to see us, and we were just sitting chatty and this.

Guy dropped the ball on us. I never knew that this guy.

Was suffering from anxiety.

And these things I am telling you.

She's my brother and I know and whether he did open up and talk us about me, I, myself and my brother were looking at each other like.

Far to something. We know you over forty over fifteen years, and we never know this about you.

Sometimes we assume that men are having those conversations and really a truly or not, because for us it's difficult and and here is the keep them. I asked the question, so what are you going to do about it? And they look at me as if why are you asking us that question.

You know.

Sometimes, or we can ask sometimes when we hear these things, we rush stay in hell and and and we have to have the.

Right time. Yeah, and that's one of the problems. Again.

We can we ask questions, but the wrong MHM allow this individual to basically be able to say, yes.

I need its help.

Mm hmm.

Yeah.

Yeah, because of the fact that not all of us are talking about it. And I think that the church, Yeah, Angie, I've heard a lot about Ballot and I'm very happy for Ballot Church and their mental health. But I think that most of our churches need to even if it's a little thing that little and basically help people to do some.

Work in you know.

Again, we run out into the community and not looking at what's happening in our churches, and we need charity begins at home when these things happening.

So I would say and Parner Store counseling service.

But I know we had started a number of years ago running mental and support groups in different churches.

So so talktal since the teen.

Be or the.

Stone, they would be able to one of us can form entreeing up individuals with Indian churches.

In terms of to run these groups.

And tow and so on and so forth, so fantastic.

So we have a wealth of professionals HM were now utilizing them.

I was actually gonna say that, so on that note of Devon, I was gonna say that anybody listening like that in the church or like they can, can't they contact Dallum to talk to Devon so that he can because I know, not just in the church and Ballance Church himself, he also does it for men's health outside the church. He has mess programs, men's only programs and stuff and events and stuff online on zoom in person too, and that they are they're actually very well well done

Will contact the station.

Yeah, yeah, so that you could get more information on that, because it's definitely there's a lot of stuff out there, like you said, Mark, that we just don't know it's there and it's sitting right there, but nobody, nobody utilizes it.

That it needs to be utilized. Yeah, definitely, And I think that one of the things that.

We need to do all suits train up people that are willing to do this work within the churches too.

Yeah.

Uh, we kind of.

Or young people that you know, especially young men and so and so doing different things that and they need that guidance and we need to be able to work with that.

So that church can grow and we can help each o.

All right, Well, we're gonna have to put a pin in it because, as we always say, time going so fast talking and next thing you know, we're like, how can we get two hours of this? We we always did until we said how we're gonna do two hours? And then we like, we need more than two hours. So yeah, we'll come, we'll come to the time that we have to get ready to sign off. But we want to thank Mark so much for helping us and coming on and giving us the knowledge you know and

We're looking forward maybe to bringing bringing some other persons on the planel And we always say it. We always say around.

Yeah, I tell you right now, we do around. We do around table. So we mights to talk.

We might as to talk to the to the manager of vegemating and say, look, we need three hours or something.

Around table is not gonna be two hours is not gonna be enough. I'm gonna take you that right now.

That's all good. That's all good.

I guarantee you that, so you know, but we'll work on that in the future.

Also be good. Has to be a qucket thing for one of our talk reports on the talking points on the road as well.

And it would be a great kind of way to kind of if you could get and I say, weep as a woman as a group, you know.

Come together actually mean price or have that kind of discussion. If we're allowed to kind of do that sort of thing.

But yeah, maybe do one, maybe do one that's not recording one and then break it up.

Yeah, absolutely absolutely, just do it.

And then how long it goes, it goes, and then we just break it up and sort it out. We figured it out later. So you have ways to get ways to do it, so pre record.

What we do is pre record topic, yes.

Around table and period card. So ever it goes over two hours, because still we don't we're not.

We're not time abound.

Were just having time restraint, So.

We just do it.

If it's three four hours, that's fine, and then we can break it up and then put it over what to the shows kind of the kind of like maybe a series.

Of like something like that.

Just this is a good point to say that we're thinking of doing actual live workshops. So maybe that might be the context of the place that we can do something like this. We're put that out then putting it out there, and it could be as part of an a y program, but it could be that we set up something in a community center or something like that. We will invite our listeners to come along meet you guys, but also maybe have conversations like this, and it's not

So I'm pretty sure that you looked up because I didn't.

I'm sorry, do you look I know we have Cornerstone, yes, well as what's the other I'm going.

To put you on this Samaritans. I believe there's one one six one one six yes for the Samaritans, so you can contact them. And also there's a lot of information on mind Mine's website that you can leverage. Angie,

You need to go.

Yeah, so I get to say this now, Dear.

It's all right, so right, definitely, Father, thank you so much for this conversation. I feel it's been impactful. I feel that it's made a difference to those who have listened. I want to pray in particular for doctor Sappho and for Mark. May you bless them, Bless the work that they're doing in their communities, Bless the work that they're

Joining point today as you always say, my name.

Is, my name is Anja. Oh goodbye.

One day we'll get it right.

That's what we did. It good that we absolutely perfect. Once in a blue is better than.

Nothing, indeed indeed, and we'll keep at it. Bye, guys, God bless you.

Thanks Mark.

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