Hi, I'm Kristin Davis, and I want to know are you a Charlotte? Hello, everybody. We are just going to have a little recap of All or Nothing. It's episode three ten. It aired August thirteenth, in the year two thousand and This is a really, really, really really good episode. It's one of my all time favorite episodes. Directed by Charles McDougal, one of my favorite directors, and written by Jenny Banks, one of my favorite writers. And in this
episode we have great people. Of course, we have Corbett it's playing Aiden. We've got Kyle playing Trey, we have Franny playing Bunny. We have Josh Hamilton playing George, whom I love so much. He's a great actor, you guys, and his part's really funny. So this is the episode. The gist of this episode is that this is when Carrie has been cheating on Big. She has not confessed to any of the friends that she has been doing this.
She is trying to just kind of move along with Aiden as though it didn't happen, and focus on the fact that she has a wonderful boyfriend. And then she'd be walking along and she'll have these flashbacks of the
sex with big, and then she's like, oh God. And she's really really good when she has these, because I mean, we've all been there, and she's you know, internally riddled with guilt and trying to kind of somehow muddle her way through, and she's like, I'm never doing it again, and you know whatnot, so let's.
Talk about it.
Basically, what happens is she's got these flashbacks. We come, we start at Samantha's new apartment in the meatpacking district. We're having this little like party.
Where one of the really funny, very.
Time type things we're talking about is how you can have anything delivered, because Samantha says, I said, oh, did you make these whatever we're eating, and she says, no, I have them delivered, just like the dinner and the drinks and the DVDs. And we're like, oh, you can have DVD's delivered, Like it's it's so much the year two thousand, it really makes me laugh. So she's like, yes, you can have anything you want delivered. Yesterday I had
condoms delivered. And then someone says, I hope you didn't have sex with the delivery guy and she's like no, anyway, it's pretty entertaining, and she goes to the window. Samantha goes to the window and her this is her beautiful new apartment in the meatpacking district that she bought. She goes to the window and she opens the window and she kind of shouts to the meatpacking district like.
We've got it all.
Basically, she wakes up the next morning, she has these huge windows, the sun is shining on her face, and she is sick. Samantha is sick. We have rarely seen Samantha sick. And she goes to try to shut the curtains and she breaks her curtain rode. It falls on her because she's kind of delirious because she's got a fever. And so then it's like, breaks my heart. This whole
montage breaks my heart. She starts going through her black book and calling the guys that she casually has sex with and asking them if they could come over and hang her curtain rod, and all of them say no. It is really sad to watch. I felt really really bad for her, and I fully relate to this because it's tough being a single goal and having stuff break
around your house. And my advice is to call the handyman I'm sure we all remember that Charlotte actually has sex with her handyman in the second season because she's so excited that he comes over and fixes something at her house. I mean, I relate to all this. I know it's probably very sexist for me to say this or whatever, but it is very relatable, and.
I feel really bad for Samantha.
So eventually, luckily in the episode, Samantha calls Carrie and Carrie does go over there to take care of her. And I had fully forgotten that Samantha basically makes her make the syrup that people in Atlanta drink, which is like cold medicine codeine, which I don't think Samantha has, and what's the drink, like Fanta or whatever. Yeah, it's kind of funny. So she has Carrie make this medicine for her, this drink, and she's like, give me my drink.
It's pretty funny. It's a pretty funny little scene. So Carrie's over there with six Samantha. No wait, she confesses
after the party, I forgot. So once the girls leave the party, it's just Carrie and Samantha, and Carrie decides that Samantha is the person that she should confess to because Samantha might not judge her, which of course she's right, and Samantha is a very good listener and says, you know, I'm not going to judge you, and Carrie says, like, go ahead, go ahead, judge me just a little bit. Samantha's like, not my style, and that I thought was a really beautiful moment, and I think it's great to
have a friend who's not going to judge you. I think that's important because obviously Carrie's being hard enough on herself, which doctor Orna in our Companion episode this week does say that Carrie feeling guilty is a sign of being healthily integrated in your mind to your actions. So I think that's very important that Carrie got the stamp of
approval of being a healthy person from doctor Orna. And I want all the people who hate Carrie to hear that, because if she was really a full narcissist, she would probably not even feel guilty. That Orna didn't spit that out, but I think that's really what she was saying, is that they compartmentalized to the extent where they're not even really necessarily aware of the things.
That they're doing.
That they shouldn't be doing, so they don't even feel guilt, which is terrifying to think of.
So Carrie is not that person. She's not that person at all.
So she confesses to Samantha before Samantha gets sick. Samantha is a very good friend, does not judge her, and then Carrie tells Samantha it's not so. Samantha says, so you're having an affair and Carrie says, no, no, no, no, it's just this one time. So you're like mhmm, because of course we all know that's not true. Then Carry goes after over there and takes care of her, which is really adorable. Then Samantha's better and comes to my engagement party, so we'll get to that in a second.
So we find Charlotte in Burgdorf's.
This is the scene I remember so well that I talked to someone about Kyle. I guess we were in Burgdorf. We had somehow hauled a big crane up there, and Charletts wanted this shot, kind of an aerial tracking shot through the China department. I don't know if you guys remember in the first season, Charlotte goes out with the guy that Carrie had dated because she thinks he's the marrying type, but then she does not date him when they see some china in a window and he doesn't
like the pattern that she likes. He likes a different pattern that she does not approve of. Charlotte has some very specific opinions about china patterns.
So we're in Burgdorf. I'm flipping this plate over.
I'm looking at it, and then I'm looking at who made it, and we did it like thirty six times, That's what I remember. And Kyle's there, and Kyle comes over and looks at the china and says, I believe He says fourteen hundred dollars, which does seem insane, but apparently that is the actual price of the actual plate that I was holding, which.
Is also like crazy. I don't think I.
Knew at the time that I'm like flipping over a fourteen hundred dollars plate in burger If I think, I would have been really scared. But Kyle Trey says, you know, oh, you know. He kind of makes a space and he's like, I can't afford that because we'll be eating ramen off of this based on my china debt and Charlotte pouts and then he's like, oh, I can't take that face.
And I'm like, see, this is all because I saw Bunny do that alrighty thing, you know, where she put his hand on his arm and then he does what she wants. But it's not a good relationship situation to be pouting to get what you want. So I was like, wow, I blank that part out. That was interesting.
Tray's like, yeah, yeah, we'll register for that.
And then I say, did you do your wedding your engagement party list and he says, oh, yeah, I almost forgot. So he gets these papers out, he hands them to me, he walks away. The China saleslady's looking at us. I think because we kiss or something. She's like disapproving or whatever,
which was interesting. And then I look at the papers and I see his really really messy handwriting, which I was also interested in, like, I do not think that that's Kyle's handwriting, but okay, and then I look at a paper behind that and I say what's this and he says, oh, that's.
A pre nup.
You know, it's just normal. Everyone in my family does one. And I look kind of shocked. And then we he says, oh, just have your lawyer look over it. We cut two lunch with the girls. Who is my lawyer, Miranda, Miranda Hobbs is my lawyer. She's reading over She's like, oh, it's all standard. But Charlotte, Charlote's got some big eyes, and she's like, but it's so unromantic. And basically she I'm saying, like is it?
What do I do?
And Miranda's saying, oh, it's just normal. You know a lot of people get prenups. Carrie's like, oh, yeah, a lot of people get prenups. And Miranda says, you know, this is just an opening offer. You can negotiate. And I say, but I don't want to. It's not romantic. And she says, oh, you know, it's pretty standard. And then she goes, oh, but this is odd. He has you on a on a vestment thing something like that.
I'm not, obviously not not versed in prenup language, where if you have a boy you get oh here it is here it is for every five years they're married, she gets a percentage of five hundred thousand dollars over thirty years. I mean, that's lame people. And obviously Charlotte feels the same way. And then if Charlotte were to have a boy child, she gets one hundred thousand dollars free and clear. And then Carrie says, well, what does
she get for a girl? And Miranda says nada. And as doctor Orna and I talk about, that is horrifying, and for some reason Charlotte doesn't seem horrified.
Enough in that scene. I don't know why.
I don't know if I wanted to be horrified and they didn't want me to be horrified, or if I'm just generally upset and they didn't want me to be specifically upset about that. But it does seem really fully one hundred percent insane that somehow he would give me one hundred thousand dollars if I had a boy baby, but nothing if I had a girl baby.
What the heck? Man is just wacky.
And also, five hundred thousand dollars over thirty years, based on every five years, that's a horrible deal.
That's a horrible deal. So I hadn't really thought.
About all these numbers, because back at the time, I
don't think I was paying attention to the numbers. I think I was so stressed by the scene that I knew was coming where I have to try to negotiate with Bunny and the engagement party scene and I have to say to her, I'm worth a million, which lives on on the internet, which is of course a joy, but at the time, so scared, you guys, to do that scene, so scared, so weird to do a scene where you're actually saying a number, a figure of money that you're worth to marry someone.
It's very, very weird.
But when I watched the scene, I did really love it because I love Franny Sternhagen, who's playing Bunny, and I remember the scene because I was in such a panic, and I remember Jenny talking to me about it. I remember Charles talking about it, I remember Darren. I think Michael Patrick, like so many people, had a lot of ideas about how I was supposed to do it, and I feel I feel like what they wanted was for me to be very strong, and when I watched it, I felt like I was strong.
Because I think just to even say it is strong.
But I don't know if I delivered it the way they wanted, because I remember feeling at the time that I hadn't done what they wanted.
But when I look back on it, I think I did fine.
It's one of those ones where I'm like, see that I was worried for no reason there. But I do really like that scene because I don't feel like we see stuff like that very often. And I also feel like it is, of course showing us a lot about that family that they would have this prenup that apparently everyone in the family signs. That's kind of bonkers, right, And I do feel like Charlotte should have been worried. But I also feel like when I say I just really love him and I want to marry him, I
do think that's one hundred percent true. And also what I've forgotten is like I go to the girls to tell them like, oh, I did it. I negotiated with Bunny and I signed the papers, and they're like great, baby.
And then they don't call me baby. They say great.
And then Kyle comes and says, can I steal my bride? And I go off with him and I kiss, and I think Sir Jessica Carrey says something like at the end of the episode, I think she says something like and then there were three. I'm just like, oh God, it seems like I'm leaving them. I totally forgot about that. But we all know it doesn't last, so it's gonna be fine, you guys. But I had a moment of panic. I'm like, don't do that, Charlotte. Leave them, don't leave
them into a scary family. That's not smart. That's how I felt watching it. I don't know how you guys feel watching it, but that's how I felt. Okay, then let's go back to Samantha for a second. Did I carry everything?
Yes? I did? I did. Oh no, I forgot. She's sick.
Carrie goes over there to make her medicine for her. Samantha says some totally crazy Charlotte like things. It was I didn't remember this at all. She basically says I should have gotten married because there's no one to hang her curtain rod right, and Gary's just looking at her like who are you? And then later on, thank goodness, I mean, she just say we are all alone, Carrie, and Carrie says, no, we're not.
We have each other, which is adorable.
And then luckily at the end, when Samantha feels better to come to my engagement party, and Carrie says something like, yeah, you were saying some crazy Charlotte like things. She says, oh, yeah, I'm fine now you know I had a fever. And you're like, oh, well, golly, that was scary. That was scary, Samantha. So let's talk about Miranda for a second, because I had remembered that Joshua was on the show. I'm a big josh Hamilton fan, but I did not remember this
part at all. So when we're at the early scene where Miranda is reading the prenup to me, this handsome lawyer.
Walks by and he's like, oh, you're working over lunch and.
She's like yeah, and he said, oh, you sent me to this hip restaurant. And Carrie's like him and looks at Samantha, I mean sorry, Miranda like, oh, you're not him, which is also funny. And then it turns out they have a date that night, so they go on the date and then they make out in the hallway, but then the guy has to go his character's name.
Let's see, his character's name is George.
George has to go back to Chicago where he lives, and she says, you know what we do it agangst is all very hot, and heavy in the hallway, and he says, of course, I come and go all the time, but there's also the phone, and she's like, okay. So then they start having phone sex, and it's kind of.
I feel bad saying this. It's a little cliched.
Okay, it's a little cliched phone sex where I had to think through, like what do people actually say?
And I feel like it. I guess if you have.
Never had sex with the person and then you're having phone sex first, which kind of seems odd, but I guess that might happen in life, then you might just go to kind of like the stock things that you would say, which I feel like is what they're doing. But I also feel that in the year two thousand, we have probably not seen characters on television show having phone sex, right, so so I'm going to give our
writers a break there. But I did think, like, we need to be more creative at our Phone sex was really what I was thinking, because they were having basically it seems like they're having phone sex every night, and then the really entertaining thing happens, which is at.
One point, oh, I forgot this.
At one point, Miranda's having phone sex and I call her about the prenupt to tell her that Bunny's not going to negotiate, and I'm like, I'm in a panic on the other line, but she's having phone sex. She's like, Charlotte, I've got to go, and you can hear me trying to talk to her and she clicks over right, which is.
Kind of funny.
Then the next time we see them having phone sex, he gets another call and he clicks over and then he comes back to continue the phone sex, but he's skipped ahead in the phone sex to a part that they weren't at, which alerts her that something is off, and she's like, no, no, you were kissing my breast and he's like, no, no, I was thrusting and she's like, no, no, you weren't.
We hadn't gone to that, and then.
He goes, oh uh, and she says, wait a minute, and she sits up. Are you having phone sex with other people? And he's like, well, Miranda, we never said that we were exclusive. Like he's kind of entertaining, and that's the end of George. We don't get to see Q Josh Hamilton again, which is kind of sad. And apparently I read in the notes that he was in
the other room. He wasn't recorded pre recorded, And this is something that we would very commonly do, especially in the early days, Like if we had a phone conversation that was in any way important, right, like, like I mean really any phone conversation, if there was any way that the other actor could be there, we would do it that way. Because what you're left with if you don't do it that way, you would never have a pre recorded voice of the other person because that would
be weird. You would have the script supervisor read it. But of course the script supervisor is probably a woman. They normally are I don't know why, and they're just reading it kind of like without emotion or whatever.
So it's hard to do your.
Performance in the same way that you would do it
with the actual other actor. Right. So like even if it was you know, I don't remember if I also was in the other room to call Miranda, I could have been, but I also could have been on another set doing another scene, right, So you're always trying to make it work out that you're free for the time that they need you to do the other off camera, you know, voice, which is your your performance, your side of the phone performance, right, But I remember, like I
have an argument with Miranda coming up down the line where I say, I choose my choice. I choose my choice. Do you guys remember that? I remember one hundred percent. She came and sat on my apartment set so that we could actually act with each other. I can't see her because I'm on the phone, right, She's like behind the wall. But you know, it makes a huge, huge difference in your performance for phone conversations. I don't know if everybody does that or not, but that's what we do.
That's what is preferable, I think. Anyway, Carrie, let's discuss. Oh my goodness me, this is just like the height of Carrie's really intense drama, but also the height of Sarah Jessica's like incredible acting, like incredible acting. I felt like it was so real and grounded what she always is. But just the guilt when you're just like just can
eat hardly think straight because you feel so guilty. And of course Aiden's just being super sweet, because that's always how it is when you've done something bad to somebody. They're being super sweet because they don't even know. It's super interesting. So first we see Carrie and she's you know, happy and kissing Aid and then she's saying that she's going to go off with us, and he says, oh, what do you guys talk about? And she says, oh, you know, we braid each other's hair.
It's really funny.
And then he goes, well, don't you talk about the Fellas and.
She's like, uh, well, you know, I guess it comes up.
Which I'm just laughing because, you know, this is like the commentary about the show right at this point is that, you know, we talk about men, and we talk about men in the ways that people didn't used to think women talk about men, which is all very interesting. And then at some point he says something about his head
of hair or whatever. I can't remember why, and then he says he's not losing any and then apparently later in the show we're going to see some rogue and there's gonna be some conversation about So that's one of those things that the Internet would be very upset with now, but we didn't have Instagram back in the olden days, so we got away with it, I guess. But she's all loveyw with them is basically what I'm trying to say.
Then she goes off to see us at Samantha's new apartment, and then she ends up confessing to Samantha, and then even though she wasn't supposed to see Aden that night, she goes and knocks on his door, which was another time that I thought about the now versus the then when we were doing and just like that, we had a scene where Chay knocks on Carrie's door and Miranda opens it, and I personally got so many texts like
that would never happen. Why didn't Chae ring the bell down on the street like it's real like in reality, And I was like, oh my gosh, you guys like sometimes someone's coming out the door and you go in the door. But now that like in a New York City building. I don't know if that made sense, but like you know what I'm saying, sometimes you don't have to use the intercom because you can just go anyway.
My main point that I want to make is that now that I'm rewatching the show show, I'm realizing that it happens.
All the time in our show.
Big shows up at Carrie's and just bangs on the door. Carrie shows up at Biggs with all the different outfits. You think he's buzzed your up.
No, people are not prepared and people show up at their doors.
It's just what we did because you know why, it's dead screen time to watch people buzz. Now. I do remember other scenes in Carrie's out because Carrie has a little intertercom by her door where people would buzz. So I guess if it's something interesting, we would have them buzz. But it's not something interesting. It's dead time. We don't
have time. We only have twenty five minutes to do the whole show, right, So that's why we don't do it, which is the same reason why we don't hug each other every time we see each other or every time we say goodbye. There is not screen time. There's no hugging aloud. Anyway, back to this show, So Carrie ends up going back to Aiden's apartment.
She comes in.
He's in a sheet, he's all adorable and he's like massive sheet for his naked sleeping self. And she comes in and you can tell she just so happy that she has him and that he doesn't know the truth about what she's been doing, and it's kind of sweet. And then She's still struggling to try to get the thoughts out of her mind a big and so she does all this organizing in her apartment, wearing the cutest, weirdest little green like jumpsuit, one of her very unique,
you know, at home outfits. She's smoking a lot, and then she calls Big and she's like, we.
Need to talk about what happened.
And he's like now, and he's kind of his regular dick self, if I might say, and she's like yes, because you know, it was just a physical thing and we are not going to be that immature and let that rule us.
And he was like, we're not.
And she goes, no, we can, you know, go against those urges. And he said, well, can you really do that?
And she's like yes. Cut to them in bed together. So sad, so sad.
So I was really having a lot of mixed feelings because I was on aid inside this whole episode. You know, I don't know why. I guess it's just a on the episode whose side I'm on. But they sleep together again, and then Aiden's been out of town.
I left that out.
He had to take a chair to someone in Pennsylvania, which I'm like, wait and just like that. I think he goes to Virginia, which is where he lives, but in this time he has to go to Pennsylvania in the truck. It's all very it's all very. Aiden has a lot of similar similar through lines. So Aiden comes back and she's like, oh, I missed you so much, and there's no sheets on the bed because they smelled
like Big. But Big had said he can smell Aiden on the sheets, and she's so worried that Aidan's gonna smell Big on the sheets, so she taken the sheets off. And then, oh, Samantha, weirdly had said to Carrie in the first scene, if Aiden hasn't said I love you yet, then you're a free agent. And I thought that that was so odd because why does Samantha care what the guy is gonna say. Shouldn't it be up to the woman if she's a free agent or not. Thought that
was really interesting. So then Aiden comes back and he says, Carrie, I was thinking about something while I was gone, I love you, and you can see carry just like man. It's oh god, apparently now I'm not a free agent now. And then she of course tells him that she loves him.
Back and then oh, this was so scary. It's like maybe the next morning and the phone rings, and oh, Aiden, proving he's so smart, is filling in the password the sorry the crossword for her, which is like so impressive because there's this whole through line with the crossword puzzle.
I don't know if you guys remember where carry walks down the street and she sees Big on the street and he's trying to do the crossword and she leans over and tells him a word in the crossword and he looks up at her like, well, I didn't know you were so smart, which of course he should have
known because she's a writer. So in this particular scene, Carrie's doing the crossword puzzle and Aiden leans over and says and she says what and he says exotic animal four down EMU and she goes, oh, well, I would have gotten that, and he said, no, you wouldn't because you have this word over here and it's wrong, and I'm like, Aiden, awesome job. Then the phone rings.
She picks it up. It's Big.
He's like, I need to see you and she's like, oh hey, Miranda, and you know, tries to carry it off and he says, I'm downstairs and I'm coming out.
I'm coming up if you don't come out, and I'm like, what a jerk, you know.
So then Carrie's got Aiden upstairs and Biggest downstairs on the street, and we've already seen that he's willing to just show up, right, So she goes down there and she says she has to walk the dog, Pete, and you know what's coming, you guys. This is one of the most terrifying, terrifying storylines in the whole show.
I think she takes.
Pete, the adorable, innocent dog down with her. BIG's down there wearing the weirdest like Hawaiian shirt. I don't even understand what's happening with that shirt. And they're in the beautiful village in the spring. It's gorgeous. Carrie's wearing her adorable gym shorts and her red slides heels, and Big is like, you know, I'm telling my wife tonight.
And she's like, no, don't do that. She gets really.
Mad, and she gets she kind of gestures with her hands and then she looks down and Pete's not there.
He's run away. You guys. The anxiety I have watching this scene.
I cannot live through it because I couldn't remember what happened to Pete.
I was like, is Pete gonna be okay?
He's running through the West Village with all the cars and all the people, and he's running full tilt, right. So when she realizes he's gone, she runs in the heels and they track along with her. The most gorgeous shots, like the trees are blooming. It's just gorgeous. But it's also terrifying because the dog is running through the traffic and Big is running and huffing and puffing after her, and I was like, Big needs to work out more,
That's what I was thinking. And then Carrie, of course, because Sara Jessica is a pro, she is running in those heels like nobody's business. And I'm just so happy she didn't an ankle because there's not even an ankle strap on the shoes, right, they're just slides and she's running. But this is who the woman is, guys, she really does this. It's impressive. So she runs, she runs, She
runs for three hours. She never calls Aiden, who's at her house, because she doesn't have a cell phone, and because she can't find his dog she thinks she's lost his dog forever. Can you imagine, Oh my god, I was dying. Then it starts to rain and she's wet and her shirt is fully see through, which I did not remember, you guys, And this was in our peasant shirt phase. We all, she bought me some peasant shirts. We wore a lot of peasant shirts this one summer.
And her shirt and her bra or sea through and I'm like, does Sir Jesca know that that thing happened, because I don't know if she knows, but I felt something anxiety about that, but most of those really anxious about Pete. She goes home in total defeat, and thank god, Pete is there, you guys.
He's at the apartment. He found his way home. What a relief.
And then Aiden says, basically, I can tell that you're cheating. And she sits down and she looks crushed like she's going to have to actually tell him. But what it is is that he thinks she's been smoking cigarettes, and so he says, you've been smoking, haven't you? And she's like, uhuh, And the voiceover says something like it was true and it was true. Of course it's not the whole truth, but it was in fact true. So then she gets away with it, but not for long, as we all know.
But it's so good. It's so good.
I mean, I can't even live through watching that dog run through the village though, I can't even watch it. It's just really stressful, but just so good, just so incredibly good. Oh my gosh, Oh should we read her really excellent voice over in the beginning.
It's so good.
I mean, this is one of those those episodes where we were really I think cheating is just fascinating, is that doctor Orner says. There's so many different reasons that people cheat and different things why they might cheat or what they might be trying to express. But I mean, it's endlessly fascinating to me why people cheat and whether they tell or don't tell, And you know, it's fascinating. So this is Carrie's initial, you know, thought for her column.
Since the since birth, modern women have been told that they can do and be anything we want, be an astronaut, the head of an internet company, a stay at home mom. There aren't any rules anymore, and the choices are endless, and apparently they can all be delivered.
Right to your door.
But is it possible that we've gotten so spoiled by choices that we've become unable to make one The part of us knows that once you choose something one man, one great apartment, one amazing job, another option goes away. Are we a generation of women who can't choose just one? From column ad? We all have too much to handle? Or what's Samantha right? Can we have it all? And I say no, we can't have it all, But I think we can have it all, just at different times.
I think it doesn't. It's not possible to have it all at once. That's what I think. That's what I think we need to understand and give ourselves a break about, Like you're doing one thing now and you can do something else in the future, or maybe you used to be focused on one thing, but then you can change your focus to a different thing. But I do think it's hard to focus on everything at once because there's just there's always so much time and energy and something's going to suffer.
That's what I think.
I hope that's not not a downer, that's like Kristin not Charlotte, obviously.
But it's a really good episode.
I hope you guys enjoy it, Let me know your thoughts on Instagram if you want to, and thanks for joining us.
Bye,