Episode 235: Can't Cheat in Peace (Feat. Tommy Davidson)

just now they here. Yeah. I like that, Like you know how that is because even for you, like with your career from early on, you gotta make it happen. It doesn't stop. It doesn't stop from the second I hit the apolo here doing comedy and DC, nothing's been the same, right, you know? And I want it um. But I lost at the finals. Yeah, I lost the finals, but it was kind of a set. There's still a win though, because the win is that a lot of

people had the opportunity to see you. And then it kind of jumped started more than it was the thing. But but but he pulled the technicality East Coast technicality on so the audience with the audience was voting, So it came down to that. David Peason, remember David Peason, the singer that was a while back. I only think you google Piece and the singer. It was down to

me and him. But I was a comedian. No comedian had ever won that thing because all these singers, and that's when Paulo, you know, was real, you know, the one that was sad Man came out, you know, every five minutes. Sam Man never got a chance to hit the stage back in the day because everybody was so good. So the MC goes, so that, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, the yeas even right, So then the MC goes, so who do you want? Do you want Tommy Davidson from Washington,

d C. Or David Piece from New New York? Are David Pizza to come up here today? But you know what, it's cool. He had a great career and you know, but honestly, a win is like even if you look at shows like American Idol, people who don't win and are like runner up, sometimes they end up being the bigger, right, what who was the running rock that was that's really big? Wasn't Differ, wasn't Jennifer Hudson? She won Fantasia. Yeah, Fantasia did one right, you know, but it wasn't Jennifer Hudson

and runner up. I'm gonna be honest with you, watching the show just can't stand it now. I think, yeah, she might be the biggest. Yeah besides Kelly Clarkson. Did she win or she was a running up to Kelly? She won? I think Kelly she was the first winner. Okay, all right, Well anyway, so we normally start the show off, and by the way, before we're going to get more into the book Living in Color, which is out right now, which tell us a lot about your life and which

we had no idea. But as a matter of fact, you might not remember this, but I met you a while ago when you were performing and singing at like my friend Butter he was a drummer. And where was it that was it down to it here? Yeah? It was in New York and there was all these clubs and you would be like and I thought you were going to really like launch this real singing career at that time, and he was like, yeah, I'm working with Tommy David saying, you know, he could sing da da

da da da. And so during that time I did get a chance to see you like do some stuff. Okay, Yeah, I got, I got some singing in me, and Butter's real talented. So that's that's I'm waiting on that. That's the next That's a phase, a couple of phases off. But now I'm starting to think that's apollo. Loss was your fault because you could sing, and you had the jokes, so you could have just snatched the mic. And Black

he could sing, sing, sing, he could sing. No, I think I think I improved my chances because I was so unique being a comedian. Yeah, back then, the younger black comics hadn't really blown I came into the scene where the only young black comics that were really blowing up were sin Bad. You know, Martin. Martin hadn't hit the scene. Uh, nobody had hit the scene. Chris Rock hadn't He hadn't hit the scene. Day Chappelle you came up with. Chappelle hadn't hit the scene. Nobody had hit

the scene. I was the first one to like hit the scene and come with comedy. There was another generation in front of me. It was Eddie Murphy generation, which simbadis in that age. So plus I had lost in d C because I tried to sing. Yeah No, But then one of my friends pulled me to the side. He said, you're not unique. Everybody sings. You sing everybody singing, so why don't you do comedy? So when I went to the Apollo, I was like, okay, I'm funny. We

try comedy, but in comedy I sing. Okay, yeah, fed your rund zogy you bigg made me live again. You've turned on mom, fine bay, come on nine to reach out. You know what else too? That's fascinating that you actually got to performer greats like Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor. And you met Paul Mooney too, right, Yeah, yeah, we had an interesting interview with him on the Breakfast Cup that never made it to the air. I don't know, it got a little weird. We got weird about it.

I can imagine Paul isn't his old self put it that way, all right. So we usually set the show up with a full disclosure and that's when a couple of us tell full disclosure stories. We don't have anything. It might be something we've never shared before about ourselves. So Stephanie, it's only right because you gotta do it. Go ahead, you might um you're bruised up today, so yeah, we need to hear. So the last that I decided to go out and drink, and I haven't been drinking

for like two years. For the most part, I don't get really drink. So I had like fifteen shots of patrol and I don't even drink. Way to go in. That's disgusting. Shots a drinking problem, but there is celebration one. No. I was just like, oh, oh, everybody's elside. I'm not sayingbody drink right exactly. So I went crazy and this morning I woke up with a black eye and I got this scrape. I don't know what that is. I

don't I took two showers. I don't know what that is, and it can't be the same thing you got to the fight. I called everybody, and I'm like, yo, was I fighting like everybody like yourself should see the other part. We were having so much fun. Somebody else is waking up like I got a black eye, rules nuck straight something? What I got penis has teeth marks on it? Like

home for yourself? Did you check your photos because sometimes like I find day oh, and I lost my phone main phone, so let me see you probably was fighting for your phone Larry, Larry, I had some great fight for your phone. You want happy. I woke up in the ambulance, but I got myself now. But I woke up in bed and my person was there. I was like, oh, I made it. Well, we're happy. You're hearing this right? And what would you start? What's that? Because I'm done

and here it is now. I was gonna say, me and Larry I have had some good times that we found out about on Snapchat. Yeah, because we first we got some men that we don't remember it, and then the next day we were like, look look at chat and we saw all kinds of things that we were doing that we didn't know. The crazy thing was fast right that how are you guys able to do that?

So so basically because one night I could think of in particular, we went out to eat and we went to the first foot Prince and then Stephanie, what the hell out we're doing the show? So it's like to hangoverd No. We were out of a baby shower the next day and the night before we had went to foot Prints and we ended up at Swede. We was only supposed to go to one restaurant and we thought that we went out, had a good time, and DJ

Scratch was with us, and DJ Scratches was us. We thought we just went home and I remember, to my ability, I swear I remembered everything. She couldn't make it up the stairs. I put a blanket off, fell on the floor. It was like a hundred and ten degrees. I was like, oh, she keeps the blanks. No, no, no, in my house. But I done that, said when I looked at next day we were on snapchat, I'm like, I snatched the thing out of the floor, like you know, like the

advertisement flags in front of businesses. I took it in front of a pizza place, was waving the flag. It was like pizza Pizza, Pizzai, like the sign spinners. It was like the ship that stands up. But when I tell you I thought I remembered everything, I don't remember none of that. But we had a whole night on that snapchat that neither. There were people we were hanging out with. We don't remember them being there. I was

like my cousin's husband. That husband now at the time, he was like, yeah, I've seen your cousin and she was buying the shots. I was like, why no, that's what's happening to me today. People are calling me like, yo, you yo, he was outside us, that was crazed, Like I don't even see you in years, like the last night. So yeah, so that's a couple of focus wells. Just so time me. It's your turn. I ain't got all

that stop you definitely, And that's last. But there every time that you had a night that you didn't remember and people have to tell you about it, of course, yeah, of course I grew up in d C two. Yeah, but that's been a long time ago. I ain't visited that for a while. That was a long long time ago.

I don't recommend it, but yeah, my disclosure is like you know, I um fell asleep watching forensic files and you know what I mean, Yeah, and then you have a bad second ye go to that you wasn't that good and then that's when you have a bad dream with forensic foles. I can't wake up white dude in front of me with a gun now, Yeah, but that

that's um. Remember those adventurous times though, you know, if you been through it, you know you ain't been through nothing right exactly like those things though, I really would make you like who you are, just being able to go through certain things and survive it, and it makes you like a stronger person as long as you can come through on the other side and be okay. Yeah, I mean, is it just a part of adulthood, you know? You know, the stuff is put in front of us

to do. You know, it's it's supposed to be called enjoyment and all that stuff, and you can enjoy it to a certain extent. But you know, everything got that flip side, right, You put that flip on your ass, and you the only one to know when to gauge it. You do only want to know, you know. And with today, with what's going on now, especially in the club world and and everything that's going on. Man, it's like y'all got it a lot better than read it, you think. So, yeah,

are you kidding me that? Because there's like, you know, there's so much going on. You know, we used to walk to a party. See look, I disagree with that because back then you could do stuff and get away with it. Now you can't get away with ship. Well yeah, because people are on the me and it's not even fun anymore. Everybody's out and they want to like take pictures, take selfies and their stuff there, like look back then, all the stories you told them the book. We had

no idea about some of these things. Right, if this is happening today, we got y'all got y'all got chat snap snap like that thing actually, man, that cat baby, y'all got book face. You find out now you're still in the club and they like put up the whatever happened to you? And you're still outside. Every time I catch my man in the club is because somebody put him on snapshot, right every time anything, Everything is always okay in the club. Right now, is that not your sweater?

I can see you in the back of the back of the back, I'll see you right there, zoom in on it and everything, and like so you can't even

cheating piece now, you can't chat. You can't be a bitch now Instagram what you call it cat snaps chat snap But think about it, like all the things that you went through and everything that happened, that she would have been all on blast, yeah you know, and so and sometimes that makes it hard for you to recover from things in peace because when everyone's talking about to everyone's coming up to everybody's weighing in on things. You can't even like deal with it because everyone else is

dealing with it. For you. I don't know. It's like everything everything is, you know, everything is different, nothing stays the same, you know what I mean. The thing I noticed about when I go to clubs now, you know, as as as as recent is probably about maybe six years ago. You know, six years ago, I go to Miami. You know, see people in the VI I P Section talking, you know, they are dancing on the dance floor. Never

everybody's like this, Oh my god, Oh my god. Everybody's back been sitting next to like all these hot chicks and right, come on and everybody's kind of like nodding their head to the hot song. Oh see them having a great time on their phone. It's just it's just an observation. It's so boring. Now. I feel like even even when I'm at a concert or I'm on vacation, you know, I've been I feel like I've been taking pictures for so many years on my phone. I'm sick

of it. Like I don't I'm not at the concert recording Beyonce. I'm watching it like I want to enjoy that. But sometimes I'm there and I'm like, but I'm not. Is You have to balance, You have to get a little bit to remember and to have the memory to post the show off, and then you enjoy it. That's all it's all about. Yeah, yeah, I figured, like Facebook friends and stuff like that, they don't deserve to be with me because exactly, yeah, I purposed him purpose I

purposely don't post like everything. I purposely don't post everywhere I met everything I do everywhere because it's just not for everybody. For one, and for two, I do so much that people would think I was like bragging there being obnoxious, and I'm just like, let me just not. I just so even believeing some ship you were definitely catch pure she was I was important and I didn't even I got on the airplane to but no, but

you didn't see me at the beach or smoking. Like I only posted a couple of pictures in the ghetto of Puerto Rico just to show that I'm not scary, and I could go to the yeah, like picture on the beach and the marcula snapped to the pool, and then I didn't already post a real picture until I was already back home. It was like days later when I posted that, I was, yeah, because they'll break into

your house. Now you posted you somewhere and next thing you know, they're break into your house and they gotta got a low jack on your ass. You know where you're at. Now, let me ask you this, How hard was it for you to discuss certain things in the book? Was it ever? Was there anything that you are hesitant about? Like not really, not really, because it was it was I wouldn't be me, I wouldn't mean me if I

didn't go through the experiences. So you know, when I when I finally really started thinking about it, I didn't even realize that all that stuff was like twenty something years ago, right, you know, that's a lot of a lot of growth took place. But you know, I had to have my own experiences. Yeah, you know what I mean, to learn who I'm going to be. You know, I went from an assistant chef at Ramada in something that I thought was a great accomplishment, you know, at eighteen,

to be doing that. My friend Howard told me he's about the stupidest ass person I ever seen. You know, because you should go to Hollywood and you should be doing movies and you should be doing that, you should be doing this. And I was like you no, you stupid because you ain't got no job and you make me lose my job, but loved me to death. That's my friend Howard who I grew up with INDC. You know, he's the one you give a watch too, because yeah,

yeah yeah. And Howard was like, Howard was the poorest person I knew. I had eleven brothers and sisters. He had moving blankets, you know, the moving blankets that you see Evans had them on a bit, you know, they eating shifts. You know how it was from the worst building around thee where I lived. Step Step used to beat his my other ass man, the whole family to

be out there. She'd be bleeding naked, you know. And he come over to my house one Christmas morning and he had a paper bag with three plastic army men in it and an orange and his bag had a bow on it. That's what he got for Christmas. And imagine that your Christmas president is an orange. You think somebod. So my mother was like come here. And when she said come here, I'm like, oh man, because I used to think she's crazy, you know, come here, come here me,

and she's gonna say something crazy to me. And she did. She was like, give him one of your watches. Why should I give him one of my watch? She said, because you got two of them. Your grandparents gave you one and I gave you one. So take the one that you like and give the other one to him. And I was like there. You know, for years, I was like, right, do you know that it's Howard? That there is the reason I'm sitting here Because Howard wouldn't

give me a break about comedy. Howard kept saying, man, dude, you gotta do something in comedy. You'd be the best. I'm telling you, you'd be a huge star. And so he finally got me a job at the worst strip club in d C. I mean the worst. He got me five minutes on stage. He even came over to my house February cold and ship okay, came over to my house a little dots and beat you tier with rope on the hood so it wouldn't come up when I'm driving my radiator bust the middle of February cold.

He just got out. He just got out the car. He was smiling and just went to the bus stop. He said, I'd be back here next next week, fix that ship. He came back next week. We went to the club. I walked in. The guy looked at me and he was like, is this the guy you keep talking about? And how I was like yeah. He said, you got five minutes. I turned to Howard. I was like, what what do you want me to do? He was like, and I don't care what you do. He said, get

up there and say something. And I got up there and from the first thing I said, people laughed. And I haven't stopped since. I swear that the first time I even said anything, people laughter. I stayed at that club for probably about probably about three months. Reputation went around, promoters started coming around. I started opening for concerts. Within a year. I was at the Apollo and that's where I met my manager there who became my manager. He was attorney and he was like, hey, man, you can

do anything you want. You can write your own ticket, I can take you to l A with me for a week, see how it feels. If you like it, let's move out there. So I went out there. That's when I met Eddie Murphy, Robert Townsend, Keenan and all them because I went into the Comedy Act Theater, which was the hot spot right and blew it up, and I said, I think we can do this. So we saved our money for like three months, got on his

Nissan Center. He rode down to d C, put my big gass TV in the back with glad bags full of clothes, and we drove all the way over. They're not knowing nobody, and that's just just built from there. You think things like that can happen nowadays, things like that can happen forever and a day, okay, because I feel like with like online and I felt like, also, I don't know, I feel like sometimes I think, yeah, yeah,

go ahead. You know. I just felt like people have these different types of shortcuts where they don't even have to like put all of that leg work in like you used to have to. There's nothing like seeing somebody

live in person killing a room. And there's such a difference between people being online and being funny and then being live in front of Being live and funny in front of an audience is completely Like we've seen a lot of people who are social media starts that are funny have a great following, but then they try to do stand up comedy and it doesn't right. You know, you actually built yourself from the ground up, like you took the leg work to do everything. Like you started

with the crowd, you went to bigger crowds. You know, you went from five minutes to a full set. And like you're saying, these people put up a thirty second clip and next thing that the funniest people in the world. And then you're like, how, you know what I mean, Like they didn't even no, not going well, the how is that? The howard is just just changed. It's just it's just you get more eyeballs on you because of social media, right, that's all. It doesn't mean you can't

take advantage of it though as a performer. Kevin Hart was an example or somebody who you know, used social media as a platform and got a lot of eyes on her. But he had done the work right before that. He had already been in the clubs and done all that stuff. But I forgot who I saw on a movie last night, little light skinned chick. She was on the reality show. My wife had told me she was on reality billion. So here she is doing a movie,

you know what I mean? And then there was a comedian from that I worked with on Martin Lawrences lit tour. We just started started. It was Morton also Jack Hurler's hype. It's hype. But what's her name? I forgot her name? And she wife knows everything. We don't get in all that don't even stop me. But but you know, her social media following is what brought her comedy, you know what I mean. And she's got some skills. Yeah, you

just have to work at some skills. But you're not gonna be able to build the same skills if it's social media, because it's non applied, it's not applied. That this is all opinion, that that all has to do with just being able to generate a lot of attention, you know. And I was talking to Chris Rock one time about movie projects and this any other thing, and he was like, he's like, what you know that um quality is out of style. I was like, he's like

popularities and style. You see what I'm saying. So the more likes, the more this, the more hits, the more this you get, you're gonna have a movie deal. You can do all that stuff. But what I've seen is when you actually have to do the tactile doing of

that thing that you've got so much attention for. You're not at the skill that you would have been had you just been doing that when no one was looking right, and you were doing that for a while and perfecting that for a while, regardless of what anybody thought of it, you know what I mean? I mean, And that's just it's just, you know, it's as simple as this to me.

I'm sure that people who were on horses, you know, when they saw that first card, they were like, look at that, you know whatever, you know what I mean, And then after a little while, hey, it's obsolete, right, kind of like O the CDs I have at home rights that makes me think, like, so all right, obviously y'all had the most one of the most legendary shows period and Living color, right, so yeah, about what is that? What's her name? Is that? Is that her? No? No?

Like so okay, and and like so many amazing quality like you use that where quality comedians and performers came from that situation. Do you think that there's anything because I think whiling out is kind of like they're trying to do that, like with the comedian, But do you think that they can ever be another show in this time where it can grow some of these comedians and put them Togethereah, it is wilding Out because it's just a different It's just a different set of rules. I

feel like yall have. I don't feel like wilding Out is anything closer and living colors that it was. That's what I talking about, the comedian. I'm talking about the concept of quality, Okay. I though it is kind of improv it's impress you are, It's like line is it anyway? But I'm talking about the concept of quality. So I mean, to me, my concept of quality is like earth and fire when it comes to music. Okay, So that's the

concept of quality. Horn arrangements, they said, any other thing and the way that things that, the way that that's done, pure vocals, you know, full bands and all that. But you know, I can't put that up against h. Dre and the way he produces his music. I can't put that up against these producers now who are producing stuff machines with with different sounds, and they do a whole

whole different thing, a whole different things. So I can't use the same, I can't equate the same because it's just not my same perception of quality with with that, because that's my preference. Like did you see the fifties show? Like I feel like people have tried to do sketch like it was. It was a show. It was a show where he had comedians. He wasn't on it at all. It was fifty cent. He might have came out on the first break and just blah blah, but the show

is it was total. It was total comedians, controlled by the comedians. But it was like no one stood out, you know what I mean, like to me as I was watching it. But it was also only one season. Yeah, but even in the first at Hunt even but even in the first season, I feel like Living Color, there was characters that you remembered, you know, characters that stood up. So I just felt like, is it the fact of social media that there's a reason why there would never

be able to be another show? I don't know, there could be another show like that, you know, there could be another Shout And that was definitely a right, But I also feel like it was it was him doing everything. They all wrote sketches, and that's not what I mean. I mean as far as like you have a gym Carrey, you have you get what I'm saying that Jamie FOXX

do you have? But that's because Jamie Fox didn't come to you later and the season's right and then it really was the way ins And you talk about that in the book too. And it's funny because like when you look at and Living Color, what don't you think all of them were? Like I know, this is like in our head, we think all of them are best friends. Yeah, hang out like the greatest friends that. But then you're like, okay,

there's a family. We people were We may not have been the best of friends, but let me tell you something. When it came to our work and when it came to respecting each other's skills, yeah, we're the best of friends and what we what see the thing about in Living Color was our success was dependent on our relationships. We had to collaborate to get it done. But you even said they were times they would have like little

parties and you wouldn't even get invited. You'd be like, yeah, people, yeah, yeah, what do you think I was just like that? Because your career was taken off solo, do you think that some people had like some kind of like you know, I hate kinda like, oh, well, how's he taking off? And I'm doing all this? There's always the element of competition, and no matter what we do. You know, if you take if you take Tom Brady and um, what's it like,

skimeboy name you? If you take if you take if you take Tom Brady and Pat Mahomes and put him on the same team. Okay, you know, somebody gonna lose playing time, right because both of them good. So you got a situation where you got all these people who got skills that are like, you know, wanting time. You know, everybody ain't like Woutang, but they can all get on

stage and they can all blend it. Well. No, there was definitely some standouts, I know, but I know, but when they got on stage, when they went to really go hard, that's the thing you liked about them the most is that they all came to the same as a unit. Yeah, they came as a unit, you know, So you know, it's it's it's all beautiful. It's all beautiful to just have the opportunities to do what you're doing. You know. I have just as much respect for for Trey Songs and Drake and all of them as I

do for Black Ivory and for the Shy Lights. You know, it's it's it's it's all the same. Really, just can't compare art, right, you know, it's art, you know. But y'all and what the flog girls? Like? What y'all all sleeping with the flog girls? And how did that work? Did y'all have to stay separate? You know, what's gonna do with them? Hey? You can have your number man with her and what? But you did have a suspicion that Keenan EVERYWAYNS and j LO might have had something.

It wasn't no suspicion, Okay, well yeah, I mean it was you know, a thing I guess, you know, I could only guess because he introduced me to her. Are they were together? Whatever? And I looked at her and I was like, you know, okay, you know that you better just be hanging that word y'all just hanging out because single life, you know. You know what's interesting about

the book? So you talk a lot about obviously work things and other personal things, your family life, but you don't talk a lot about your relationships like you mentioned them. But it doesn't go into depth like about a't like even today I was gonna say that you still I still eight? Look my my, I'm I'm a regular person, you know, I'm I'm an All American man, and I'm not I'm and I'm a human being. Were you a good guy though? Or where you like a dog? Yeah,

where you're a dog at any point? Honestly, keep it real back then, Oh man, got a little bit of to get it out at one. Oh my god, we gotta go. No, no, I mean, you know, let's let's let's like for me, it's you know, there's a certain something about us that y'all have to have, and this is a certain something about us do we have to I mean, there's a certain something about y'all that we have to have, and it's a certain thing about us that y'all have to have. And sometimes that exceeds our

own you know, self good. You know, we start reaching for that for what we think that thing and all of that, and here's this person here, and we hurt each other, we step on each other. We were not conscious of each other's feelings. We get selfish, you know, we we do all that stuff. We all on that, we all on that, and that's that's not that's a that's a road that don't end, you know, until the stuff stopped working. You know what, I how did you know about sex? If you if you luck didn't you yet?

How did your first then about I'm looking like your first Okay, how did that first learn about sex? Um? Watching porn? Probably that's not like the best way to learn because the first port I was more sophisticated to me. No, it was my friend's dad across the street and he was actually dying from lung cancer. So all he would do is smoke cigarettes and watch porn in the house. And we would come in and he would always be

watching porn. So we would be like standing in the hallway like no, yeah, he wouldn't even turn it off? Can I s c? Never mind the question? Yet she would right you the mountain. Welcome to Mr Davison. Let us welcome you to lips. He's got to do first, learn about sex, Like did your mom have a talk with you? Like what happened your brother? Just it's just, you know, it was just an adventure. Thing is eventual.

I mean, it's just it's just a nafter thing. I mean, you come to start knowing what what works and how it works and you got your guys and you're talking about girls and and that whole thing. That's how I learned. I just learned through experience. Remember your first like losing your virginity. Everybody remembers that. How was that? It was? It was interesting to be a little bit by surprise,

you know. And it was a girl that liked me a lot, and I didn't really know it, you know, and she was like, hey, I ain't going to detail, but she was like, you know, why don't we And so we did and that was it. The same question. I didn't care. She's like, let me bust this poem poem that TD Jake. I'm sorry, man, I know you watched you. Did you know what you were doing? Or were you terrible? Like? Was it like me? Quick everything,

take practice everything, take p disappointed in yourself? No? No, no, I was happy, you know, like like I tell you you should have you should have a manager of work, you know. And he said, ain't know, ain't ain't There ain't no such thing as bad boom boom. Anytime you can use your hand. Everything else is a step out when you don't got to do it yourself. Everybody is so crazy And what I'm glad different creature. I'm gladly different.

So was that like a girlfriend after that? Or was it like, okay, now I wasn't a girlfriend, just like an experience. I wonder how many virginities she took because this girl says didn't happen again? Was that the only time you and her? With you and her and the no, of course not but with her was one and when she wanted from you and moved on? Oh man, all right, now we have I have a question. What age do you think you stop the being promiscuous like being a

good guy? When when did you start being a good guy? You know what? You know? I never stopped being a good guy, being a good guy, like your whole face, like yeah, like when you were so you don't know the age. You don't know the age. There really was no age. It was really just it was really just a progression of experiences that led to a revelation that if I ever wanted anything, if I ever wanted anything that was going to be real, that I had stop that,

you know what I mean? And that took some time, right okay, and put all that together, because to treat somebody in order for you to be treated well, you have to treat somebody well, you know, you also have to be treating well too. You know, it ain't like men are dealing with an army of girls that don't cheat. What who? It ain't like like, it ain't like guys like hey, you know what I mean? That seems to be That seems to be the question that we're asked

a lot, you know what I mean. That's yeah, that seems to be the question that women ask, you know, when you're gonna be When did you finally start? That's it. That seems to be the question that we always get when did you finally when did you? But never but never gets asked the other way around. You know. One of the things that one of the things that we got to deal with is the fact that you know, this is opinion, is the fact that you know, we're

just stupid. You know, we were and were careless agree with that you do something like that. We won't worry about nobody's feeling or whatever. We're just gonna go for whatever. But women are a little bit more calculated, you know, and a little to me, a little bit more slick. You might not never know, and I think women cheat for different reasons. Than men too, and not even just cheat or even have more say they're not in a relationship. I'll tell me about that. So I would feel like

a woman would deal. Well, you can say why they cheated, you can say why they cheat, But I think why a woman would deal with more than one man is because men are showing that they're not seriously as certain men in their life, Like I'm going to emulate what the man is doing because obviously I don't want to put all my feelings, all my age in this back doing everything. So I was like, I guess this is the thing to do, but like the man personally, I

feel like I slowed down, like Swanny nine thirty. I feel like I'm tired now. I'm so tired to do a lot of guys. I don't. I have too much a d D To be talking to so many different guys like just one it's fine, and he gets on my nerves and then I'll go to another one. Like my grand My grandfather used to say to me, if everybody liked the same things, everybody be chasing after your grandma.

You know, we all different, you know we all you know, can't one experience, you know, trump the other you know, everybody on this on this dag on thing, this this thing that turns you know, we did not become a billion people deserve, you know, but being pious, you know what I mean, it's just a natural thing. And you find out what's good for you. You find out what's good for you, you know what I mean, and what works for you, and that's the comfortability. You know. Some

people don't want to be married. That's not that that's not the life that they want. I mean, or some people got married before say that's not for me. Some people might have messed up a marriage and said, you know what, I can do that better the next time around. But some people will convince you that they want to be married and they don't. What happened girl, Yeah, she's going I'm going through a situation. It just happened like yesterday the day before. So like with me, yeah, it's new.

So you're the enemy right now if anything. And I'm taking things that you know what I mean, because I know how to listen and learn as well, because when you go through certain things, you want to just see. Obviously everybody has been through trains, through things. And since you're a man, you have a different perspective obviously, and um, it's just weird because a person will let you believe that they want the same things as you to keep you around, you know, and then they'll be like a

different person with somebody else. I don't know the person they are with anybody else, and I don't care. But what I'm saying, you're you're I think, like a certain person to me. Why you know what I mean? And said it just being yourself. That's why it's hard to be with an actor. And I feel like I'm such an honest and forgiving person. I feel like I'm very forgiving. And you could tell me you don't have to pretend that you want to marry me for me to be around.

I respect you more from being this problem. The problem is with men is that they feel like every woman wants the same thing. They feel like every woman is looking for marriage, every woman is looking for a commitment. Every woman is looking to have their man's only mine. He's mine, he's mine, he's mine. So they come at you with this is what I have to do in order to get her. So they go to they go through this. Okay, well I'm gonna tell her this this that in the third because I know this is what

she wants to hear. But what they don't realize is there's woman out here who don't really care to be with one person forever or don't really care to just be with a guy to just for marriage. Like um So, instead of keeping it real and letting a woman decide what she wants or telling them what she wants, they put everybody in the same box and then she just don't work out. And I also felt like, it's okay, you don't want that stuff. But if as a woman

you can want that stuff. But if you said don't want that, don't sell me a dream just because you want me, you know what I mean, Allow me to make the decision on with you. Yeah, I like, let me, let me choose, like make my choice, let me use what I want to be a jass in it like you're gonna, oh, we're gonna get married x y Z time, and mean, while it's not even in your head. Yeah, have an opinion. He's like, I got we need you. Okay,

it's a main ingredient. It's a main ingredient. Okay. Main ingredient being being a group from the seventies, right, And they said, everybody play plays the food, hold on the time, hold on, there's no exception to the room. Listen hey maybe fact you maybe, but I can't lie. And everybody pleasing food now hold on song that music starts to play, and your ability to reason just when you throw it all away and you're like, hey, I'm gonna go with

you the next night because he goes high next. All right, well, since reasoning advice. Now, somebody emailed in a question, so we went to your advice. We're going off the internet, all right, So this is ask the service question. I hope you can help me out. My boyfriend and I have been dating for some time and we are having some concerns, concerns with my ability to have an orgasm. He got kind of sad about it because he thought that I wasn't being pleased because he's not able to

give me an orgasm. Even if we're go on several rounds back to back, I still have trouble. I know this might be t m I, but his size is perfect. He has a nice curve, which that that would be a benefit. But here we are to be honest. I've never had a guy give me one unless I'm on top, and I get myself there. So is this common? Should I stop using my vibrator due to the possibility of becoming desensitized? And what are some things we can do

in order for him to give me an orgasm? We've tried a vibrator for play and oral is that question for me? Yeah? What work? Hold on? Hold on? Hold on now? Can you do what the section need to say? Okay? So the advice is okay. She wants to know um about her ability to have an orgasm. She'd only get it if she's on top, and she does it herself. So I guess one. No, he can't give You can't give her and give it to herself. So she goes

on top, grimes on him. She probably plays with herself a little and that's how she why she need him there if he didn't have part in it. She likes it, but she just isn't orgasming and it's making him feel bad. No, but she can go and do that. To do that in corner where you lay there, come on now to make it. Tell me have you given every woman? Because the answers even if you thought the answer the answer is I don't really know, but you know I don't.

I don't don't write, I don't. I don't go into the situation going okay, now, how many of them are gonna get here? But but but but the thing is here. The thing is here, you know. Or my advice to her would be, you know, don't tell us tell him and that would be my advice. But she did just sad about it, you know, not tell him that he's not making it heap and tell him how to make it happenn't, don't. Don't tell your lives. Don't tell lies to tell me him. But sher house. It's like if

you want somebody to come in your house. She was, I don't know what I'm sair. The house is the house. Sorry, our house in the middle of the street. Our house in the middle of the street, in the house that's for the white board back there. They know what it is. See they're going to there, They're going, they're going, yeah, see white people know that our house in the middle of the street. You know what the middle of the street is. I'm not making it about. I just know

what I know. I just know what I just I know. Somebody comes in your house in the middle of the right or your house can be in the middle. You know, you don't want to do it in the middle of street. You'd rather do it in the house. But if it's our house in the middle of the street, okay. So if you if you want something done in your house and you want it done right, you want it done exactly the way that you want it. You guys aren't shy about that. You say no, no, no, no, no,

that's not what I want. I don't want it. I want I want I want it to be painted Oh sorry, I want it to be painted purple. But I want the framing to be white. And you and then you start with different. No, but I don't want that kind of white. I want to I want like an eracer kind of white, not like not like a hospital white.

You know, you know exactly what you want. So if you're if you're seeking, you know, a result that you can't get, then I guess the best thing that you can do in any situation is to communicate the specifics so you can help the person help you. Well, she

did say that they tried different things. She said they've tried UM four play, they've tried oral, and she also said it wasn't the only man that this happened, and I think she should do She should, you know, practice throbbing, you know, a little keygel action and it because you're getting she's coming anyway. She's coming anyway, So just just to make him feel you feel coming, and and you could beat you can take it, oh, and then get on top, do your thing. He find that he's sad.

He might happen, but then you might wake up and marks are all over you and you don't know what happened. Yeah, I think I think that I think that she should spend some alone time with herself and get to know herself. The problem is she's spending too much A long time. Did you vibrate? Said? Should I stopped using? I didn't say she should use a vibe note there's other ways for you to get Yeah, there's other ways for you to get there without using the vibrator. But but there's

also two different types of organs. There's an internal on an external. So she's probably provided she said, to her sensitivity. So if she's using the vibrator on her clitteress and she's having those type of orgasms, but then she wants an internal orgasm from the d Okay, okay, you guys. I know you guys got a lot of ways that that thing works. We just got one way. Y'all got all this so so. But but I think I think

this is a subjective. Well she asked for my advice, Yeah, I think I I think the best way because obviously she likes him, she does, she likes him him to feel bad that he can't do it. So I think the best way that the best way that she can deal with it is just to communicate to him. Community, communicate to him what she wants, you know, in the moment. Well, that's intimacy, m You know, Intimacy isn't just the action

of recent climax or whatever. Intimacy is reaching a place for both of you where you feel so uninhibited that you feel this this elation, this joy, this ultimate connection. How are you gonna get that connection if you don't communicate, He doesn't know and how's he going to do it? She should also think about things that helped her get there and stop thinking about the fact that she is not happening and think about what y'all come up with? Something else? We do him not I'm the only one ever.

Everybody you're saying you but as a woman that if that thing right there like that, you seem like, you know what, that's a good point. Now, let me ask you this, right because they always say that women are always trying to make ourselves come by focusing, and men are always trying to make themselves not come by thinking about other things. You think that's true. I think it's sickly you ever had to like try to stop yourself by thinking about something else? I wonder what, guy? Because guys,

but I mean, everybody is different. Everybody's different, you know, everybody's different. I mean I can't ever come if I try to think about it, I won't. I mean, fortunately, You'll got a lot more bullets in the chamber always like you know, you know, it's not everybody everybody different. You know, I have one bullet, you know, Yeah, I just it all comes down to the individual. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

For me, whenever like I'm whenever i'm getting or I think about porn, I think about, like the best porn scene that I've seen in a while, And that makes me, what's the best one you've seen in a while. She's not going to say she almost and then she put every definitely I would. I'm gonna go and she's not gonna say that the best and Bruce is all over her body, she can't find her phone, her person in a bed with her. The ways to be thinking about

right now? When am I thinking about? Now? The show? No, the best porn She's not going to say is the scene I said, Cornio, I watched gay porn and like it's like three guys they're all together and they're sucking on each other and they're sucking on each other. See, I've never that is what I like. I know I knew and I knew that, and y'all forced her to say that. I know not y'all forced her. Don't let her say it, y'all. We usually have in common, like dicks,

and I know that's my second goal. Yeah, lately I've been watching gay porn all right, But before everybody, you know, everybody and everybody's fine, dark skinned goes and they look good out with and they'd be like what And I'm be like, have you seen those those barbaras? Oh my god? That ship is so so living in color, living but

living in color. The book is about it's it's amazing read. Yeah, we can in either the heterosexual box one time, just once, okay, because I know back in the day they always used to be like so and so in the industry, they all but like there ever a time where someone in the industry, a man hit on you and you had to shut them down. That's every man, oh my god, all of us. Any man that's attract another famous man though, And I'm not saying don't say his name or I'm

not asking for that. He said, that's never happened, all right, because it has happened. That's happened to every man. Is it awkward, like did you have to work with the person after that? And was it awkward for you? I don't think it's I don't think it's awkward for for head or sexual men at all, you know what I mean. I don't think it's award at all. It's just a simple fact, you know. I think men are really factual. You know. It's the same as I like, you know,

that's that's not me. You know. It's the same as if a woman tries to hit on you, you know, like I'm sure, yeah, but I think it's just a little different because guys are supposed like so more macho. So I think it would even take a man a little bit more time to ask a man or approach a man than a woman, Like I say, take a little more risk. Risk is risk. But I mean, you know, like any you know this is my opinion, you know,

any you do this cool? And or where he is, he's not going to like breaks my nose, right as long as nobody that's not appropriate, you know that's not me and just kind of leave it at that. You know, was there ever any in Living color porn? You know how they do spoof? Not right now? Right there, keep that right there. I'm not looking at that. It is this definitely is. Can you show me and they to have a head detective? Oh that makes sense. That's so funny,

look at it. What else would be a really good thing with. Yeah, let's come up with something like y'all go ahead. I got my book right here, y'all right now, but thank you so much for joining us. I know you have a lot going on and we do appreciate it. Listen, listen, listen listen. No no, no, no, no no. The reason why I did this book, The reason why I did this book is because this book is like for everybody.

You know, when I just when I discovered that, you know, that I was black and my family is white, and I love them, you know, And that was like the worst day of my life when I found that out, because I was like, you know, how could people be so stupid that they let something as simple as color separate them. But as I started, and so at that age, like five, I started really seeking out the answer to questions like that, and the question just started getting bigger.

How can people with money or how can people do things to people over money? Or how can people do things to people over relationships? Or how can people do this?

Or how can people do that? That can be? And after a little while I stopped asking why and just putting into an index all of the reasons that life is good and all of the reasons that you can be happy, you know, and all the things that I went through, all of the experiences that I had, I took them and put it in a place where if you're ever in a situation where you don't know where you're gonna turn emotionally, or you don't know you don't

know how you feel about something that's coming around the corner, are you so scared you saw motherfucking scared to share something with somebody, you know what I mean? Or you you you lose something that you loved so much. I lost my mother. I lost my best friend Keith, he got murdered right before it moved to d C. You know, or how people do you? How you can love somebody and give them everything and they can turn on you and and and and and feed you to the sharks.

You know. I put all of that off in there to show how I negotiating my path around there and it was able to maintain happy and was able to maintain growth, and was able to maintain balance within the world that I don't have no control over. I know one thing. I don't know about no heaven. I don't never know hell. But I know about here, and I know here. I wasn't in the helicopter with my daughter

right the other day. And so if I am here with you and you were here with me, then that's the good part and the other stuff is just life. That's where I made the book. Ah, well, that's amazing. That is great. And listen if you and for guys, if you're fans of Tommy Davidson, fans of Common, your fans of anybody that is trying to aspire to something great. If you're aspiring to something greater, it is a great

read for you to get. And you have such a unique background, so it's important for you to see of that story because guess what, there's people out there that are going through similar things, and I'm sure reading a book like Living in Color, they might see themselves in you. Or it might be inspirational for people to say, Okay, I'm about to go and take a risk, and you know, risk it off of something that I know I'm great

at and that I love and not care about. Okay, what if this doesn't work, because it has to work, you know, Well, I can't wait to read this book and I get mine. Oh that's yours, that's mine, that's mine, all right, but thank you again. Yes, Tommy Davidson, no more. I'm never drinking again. I recon my drink. I say I'm never drinking again, but I think I'm really not doing too I say that every day. I'm about me a T shirt. Today Show